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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 28 ก.ย. 2024
- www.ted.com William Ury, author of "Getting to Yes," offers an elegant, simple (but not easy) way to create agreement in even the most difficult situations -- from family conflict to, perhaps, the Middle East.
TEDTalks is a daily video podcast of the best talks and performances from the TED Conference, where the world's leading thinkers and doers give the talk of their lives in 18 minutes. Featured speakers have included Al Gore on climate change, Philippe Starck on design, Jill Bolte Taylor on observing her own stroke, Nicholas Negroponte on One Laptop per Child, Jane Goodall on chimpanzees, Bill Gates on malaria and mosquitoes, Pattie Maes on the "Sixth Sense" wearable tech, and "Lost" producer JJ Abrams on the allure of mystery. TED stands for Technology, Entertainment, Design, and TEDTalks cover these topics as well as science, business, development and the arts. Closed captions and translated subtitles in a variety of languages are now available on TED.com, at www.ted.com/tra.... Watch a highlight reel of the Top 10 TEDTalks at www.ted.com/ind...
“When angry you will make the best speech you will ever regret” facctts
I quite appreciate William Ury's focus on peaceful conflict resolution & his suggestion that we have the power to make peace happen. US politics have been focused on making war with the other side to the point where war-making is a growth industry. We can all opt out of that & opt into helping us all based on our interests.
I loved the way he started with a story which was mind boggling...Great one!!
Hostility to Hospitality.
Re-frame the way we look at things to get to that hospitality mindset.
Not easy but not impossible.
It takes strength to be courageous and endure and walk that hard road.
Amazing video; I especially like how he opened the video with a with story. It demonstrates how we deal with issues on a regular basis and how crucial negotiation skills are.
I love TED talks... the intellect of these individuals amazes me
the definition he gives for the terrorism and the opposite of terrorism is awesome and commendable. Hats off to you William Ury
This man is a gift that humanity got. we really need him in Africa. Ury, you are great!!!
Uma mensagem para ser refletida e levada a serio.
Parabéns!!!
Excellent lecture.
A collaborative way can bring nations together.
The guru of negotiation. Worth listening to.
What a great insight. Thank You William and Ted.
*snaps snaps all around. At the end of the day it is all about ourselves and what we can do for our community that will bring peace into our lives. If we just take the time to get to know others there would probably be less hatred and confusion. Also, if a conflict arises just take a step back, take a break, or have fresh eyes/ears in order to come into an agreement between all parties. Great Ted Talk brb I need to do the Ted Walk, haha.
I really enjoyed his story from the African tribe where they put away all weapons and sit down to talk to reach a solution. They do not stop talking until a resolution is met and if someone does not agree with the group and are still upset, they are sent to be with family until they find peace. If everyone in the World followed this method instead of fighting, war and destruction, we would all be living in harmony. We can learn a lot from deciding to choose a third side in conflicts. If we can assist others on complete opposite ends of an argument with a fresh perspective then maybe we can find greater peace than conflict in many areas. He also mentions the story where he was the mediator and found himself getting verbally attacked. He then stayed calm and redirected the conversation back to the main point. If we find a mediator to help us in conflict, the third side, we may be able to reach greater solutions.
Arriana Roehl
MGMT 4300-70
Beyond 'talking' - this is a great 'walk' - Highest Recommendation. ~ Much Love, James
Hey James, are you alive rn? If so, hmu!
These are good ideas for humanity.
What a beautiful idea, and he has great shining eyes!
The word solution represents something static which is not possible in a dynamic world.
THE POINT is: a 3rd party is a way of changing the vector of dialogue. ANY dialogue constricted to a single direction will take the form of conflict over time since the parties represent different dynamic systems. It's about stepping in once in a while to point out the constrictions that a static vector poses on individual and COMMON INTERESTS, it's about staying in motion parallel to shifts on the outside.
The explanation of this idea is very good. But I think it's incomplete because the heart of conflicts' matter is not only a reason of kind of behaviours, it's also because of the confrontation of our different personnalities. According to me, the open-minded quality, listening to people, be objective are the keys of the resolution of a conflict. The knowledge of ours opposites is essential.
great insight.thankyou mr.william.
the idea here is that individual moral choices, i.e display of the virtue of hospitality, particularly across borders, can ultimately solve political problems...which makes a fair amount of sense in a democracy, because it promotes a more compromising viewpoint (this being the "third side" he mentioned)
@DJGelbart I think you missed the point; 'The solution is simple, not easy', but it works. That's it.
Just love these talks! I have to share this. thanks a lot for awakening our brains :)
Very inspirational
Excellent Talk - and worth exploring at every opportunity. QUESTION: WHAT DO YOU DO IF THE EXISTENCE OF TERRORISM OR HOSTILITIES IS THE VERY RATIONALE FOR AN ENTITY'S EXISTENCE? (Specific example: What will happen to the military-industrial complex if PEACE TRULY REIGNED on this Earth? No weapons required - not even a hand gun!)
Amazing perspective
Very good.
"The secret to peace is us". The secret to conflict is us in caps
Excellent insights
very enlightening.
he reminds me of GANDHI, who did a similar DANDI MARCH...a 15 day walk to the beach to break the salt law .......all this happened when britishers ruled india about 60 years ago.
please search google images with the search words ' dandi march' to see it.
The irony of this talk is that, if abraham had never existed, the conflict in the middle east would probably never have happened....
@ToSho29 i know, i'm just saying, the problem is not that 17 doesn't divide by 2 or 3 or 9 but that the will lives out 1/18 of the camels. say that it wasn't camels but something dividable, say 17 kg of gold, the first brother gets 8.5kg the second ~5.66kg and the last ~1.88kg all together ~16.05kg and that's w/o the wise woman's contribution so where does the remaining 0.95kg go?
@kiddhitta Did you purposefully missed the point that in that particular case, geogrpahy, culture and yes Religiuos belief is what unites them? It about negotiation and finding common ground. If you go to that region to preach them about how their religion is wrong you might as well just stay home. It's about NEGOTIATION, not religion! it just HAPPENS to be the common ground in that particular case.
@Zotov13
inner peace shines thru. dude's got something. :-)
I agree with his idea of the third side.. although with today's society people know less and less, and their interests lie in the mundane. We need to start with a knowledgeable third side to solve any issue
amazing video, values
damn this goes hard
@Salvat1onD3neid
The reason this is rated highly on ted.com and not on TH-cam is because the average intelligence of the TH-cam community pales in comparison. Reading the comments here I realized that there is a glaring lack of appreciation for out-of-the box thinking and also an inability to understand subtle differences in mindset and how these are relevant in the larger picture. He does *not* have answers but he does have a supposed 'first-step' from which other can progress.
Great vid
With the headline I'm surprised this video has any views at all. The headline and thumbnail is the only indication we have to find out which video we are going to watch next. If that means we can not accurately decide which video is good for our knowledge level, then we are all idiots.
Maybe the way to resolving conflict between religions is not trying abolish the religions, rather we should try to use them as a positive unifier.
nicely said :)
A bit simplistic about the Middle East story. The basic story is that nothing was put in place from the start of the creation of the state of Isreal to make sure people could all benefit from coexisting, that they could benefit from living together, not simply take over, steal land and homes, build a wall and oblige the indigenous population to be lifetime refugees, or who live enclaved, little freedom of movement, with no jobs, in poverty with no development or a future.
Interesting 🤔
3:02
Great comment bro
feel spartan races promote the same thing. need to push for races in the middle east
Abraham is the same guy who almost killed his own son? Right? Just checking.
@frilink
Belief in a "higher power" isn't an ability, it's a disease of mind. Belief in a "higher power" causes all kinds of destructive behavior, and is a huge problem in a vast amount of populated areas.
print(" whoops forgot ending brackets")
abraham here, bible there, where he lost his point? where he lost what he is talking about? begining of this talk was awesome, i liked that story about 3 brothers, but i rly didnt needed to hear about some wierdos made some religious journey which had 0 symbolic value to other religions which are more common in middle east and he wanted to do something to unite them...
Glenna Corner
Alysa Stravenue
@neoaeonian Well, everyone has their position on that. The Keynesians were screaming the money was far from enough, and the government failed to regulated what the banks did with what money they got. It may just have been a failure of imagination on their part, but still, simple just-in-case regulation shouldn't be that hard to institute. The idea is that the cost of living climbs nowhere near as fast as the increased likelihood of loans. Corruption = obvious regulation, solutions are avaliable.
Free Access, for all, (all with the luxury of internet access) to the mind and work of one of the Originators of 30yrs of Harvard Research in navigating the Psychology of Human Conflict Negotiations is PRICELESS / INVALUABLE, regardless of IQ/EQ, Education/Social Economic Status, Experience
@57beachbum If you had have kept watching, you might have had a more informed comment
@kiddhitta Fair enough,
- - - friends yes and no are different sides of the same coin - - - at least to me - - - ok there is a third side too - - - good lesson learnt - - - friends are we following the third side ? - - - never mind if we have failed in the past - - - let us give the third side a chance - - - please - - -
It isn't difficult to understand his points or to recognize his sincerity--this man truly wants to get his ideas across, for the benefit of everyone.
I read in some of the comments that he should not have used religious examples--I agree, but it seems religion is the last piece of overweight armor that man needs to overcome. For all its benefits in forcing people to be moral, the power for us to become master of ourselves yields far greater benefits. I agree with this man that conflict can be resolved--mostly through understanding, empathy, and tolerance.
I talk about philosophical and societal topics that help us grow as people. I also made a video on religion and morality: how it is high time for us to overcome our own fear of understanding. All I want is for us to accept the truths of our humanity and of our reality for all that it is--the good and the bad. I want for us to become the truest humans possible; fully embracing our responsibilities. That is all, no more no less. Good day to everyone! :)
***** Well said.
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Dude, such a great comment.
The explanation of this idea is very good. But I think it's incomplete because the heart of conflicts' matter is not only a reason of kind of behaviours, it's also because of the confrontation of our different personnalities. According to me, the open-minded quality, listening to people, be objective are the keys of the resolution of a conflict. The knowledge of ours opposites is essential.
William was able to use stories to keep the audience involved and understanding. He used real-world scenarios to make his point. When said the secret to peace is us, it helped me realize that we can do more than we think if we stand together as a community and share common goals.
"From the Balcony" a great reference point. For those that have made negative comments about the story of Abraham & using a religious person as a focal point, missed the main point...The common denominator.
He does say treat negotiation with hospitality, or you could say, "Do unto others as you would have done unto you." Making a point to find a common interest among the parties. What does that region value? Religion, first and foremost. Muslims, Jews & Christians all respect Abraham. Which brings a common perspective to the table & sets the groundwork for positive movement.
My Ury said, "It takes two sides to fight but a third to stop." There is real science and math behind this. Its called a mediating variable. In statistics, a variable that transmits the indirect effects of an independent variable or variables on a dependent variable. For example, the relationship between social support and exercise adherence could be mediated by motivation: social support leads people to be more motivated which in turn leads them to adhere to an exercise program.
What are your thoughts on Universal Basic Income?
German:
Viele Elfchen mit Stil
MEIN E-book, Andy Clausen
I have been with kurdish people, most of them practice this,,,they welcome people in the most amazing ways, such a friendly place,,,,good people...
The last time we did that in Afrika - Europeans colonized us , to this very day !!!
This was exactly the right guy to bring to the Russia/Chechnya talk.
This is one of many conflict resolution of William Ury without these lessons the world would be a more terrible world
Tl:dr version: be kind to others
You are a great resource to the whole world.
TED has changed my life, seriously there's something here or in the lifehack series for absolutely everyone!
The "Third Side" concept is even more powerful if you define it (and this works best among people who accept Jesus Christ as the authority on what is truth and right) as what we (or "us" as William says) believe Jesus would do in a given situation. My wife and I have used the "triangle analogy" in our marriage with great success. In a triangle you have two corners (sides) that are unique and different and opposing, but when both "sides" submit to the will of Christ (the 3rd Side or the corner at the top of the triangle), then the "two sides" (or opposing corners) move towards each other in a harmonious manner, or they go from a "hostility" as William says, to "hospitality." So the answer to peace is not a watered-down concept of "us" but lies in the God of Abraham, who is Jesus Christ. Abraham has a special understanding of the meaning of the Atonement as he was asked to and almost actually did sacrifice his son, Isaac. Walking "Abraham's Path" is to know Jesus Christ, and William Ury gets some inspiration from this prophet's life, but I suggest even more inspiration is available as you consider the letting Christ be the Third Side to any conflict, even if you are warring against yourself dealing with foibles.
Well, looks like you aren't walking through Allepo in 2016 :-(
I really enjoyed his way of sharing stories and some of his personal experiences dealing with conflict and trying to find the secret to peace. A story I enjoyed was about the Sun Bushmen, the hunters and gathers on how they would deal with their own conflict by sitting down and talking to one another. Additionally, how there is a third side to when there is a dispute between to other sides. One thing I learned is that the secret to peace is us, and that it is important that we stop fighting for a moment start talking because we may lose perspective.
@Rimsh7 It's because TH-cam lets commenters be anonymous, whereas TED.com makes everyone use their real name. It's amazing how much that single requirement gets rid of trolling.
2015 ... Walking the path of Abraham. In Aleppo ? ... ???
The key for terrorism is uninterference with the private affairs of your neighbors. If the jews were not forcibly planted in their current territory by oppressing the indigines - no conflict would ever happen. If Russia did not conquer Caucasus and did not threaten the nearby countries - no hatred would ever be toward it. Terrorism is basically the desperate attempt to confine the aggression with aggression. The bare diplomacy will not help settle the conflicts, justified by the policy of the people and the country. Only the political neutrality in regard to the neighbors can guarantee absence of aggression on their side.
Please explain Saudi terrorism then. Terrorism is simply a technique. Sometimes, a technique encouraged by idealogies that preach it is spiritually preferable.
that's what we really need, AWESOME!
I'm not religious at all, but that story choked me up. Beautiful.
so much negativity...who is really watching these talks...you spend 20 min watching them and you don't get anything out of it? Why is going against the grain/ knocking people down more satisfying than actually supporting the movers and shakers of this world. THESE people that are at ted ARE the ones that are going to make a difference in the world in a POSITIVE way. everyone needs to check themselves befoe they wreck themselves yo!
I do not appreciate being given a lecture about Judaism and how the main message can solve the middle east issue by a man who is obviously biased in the conflict, refering to giving 'respect' to 'terrorists'. The main problem in the conflict is that Israel reffers to palestinians as 'terrorists' in the first place, at the same time occupying and settling on their land. I understand that in a universal context his message may apply, but my comment is directed at his obvious hypocrasy.
@fitobcnfito i partially agree with you, but come on... laurance of arabia?
your description fits the jewish people more than the arabs...
as an arab, to me - and lots of my people share my convection - the root of all evil is the states system.. the more you divide people to groups, the more susceptible to conflicts the system is
no states, no countries, no politicians/nasty-presidents/kings/prime ministers, free living based on mutual respect & cooperation=much better world.
@samwisekayfizzle Hardly, Abraham's willingness to kill his only son is just as important as his other actions. It is useless promoting hospitality to strangers when you have a population that is thought that the celestial dictator and his ideology is above everything even family members at the same time. That attitude gave rise to the suicide bomber
It's now very annoying that whenever someone voluntarily watches a talk that doesn't pique their interest, they complain that the quality of the talks is going down. Get over yourselves, the point is to hear different ideas and perspectives, not just the one's that you agree with. There's too many of you psuedo-intellectuals out there. Just be quiet.
@bathetcnow oh thats bullshit, there are so many other commonalities across the vast majority of mankind. Love and the rest of human emotions, our biomechanics, our ability to reason, imagination and many other cognitive abilities... how can you say there is only one thing we have in common?????
This is wasted time. I can't find anything inspiring nor interesting about this talk. There are no real solutions presentend, no information not already known, and I can't see why the comments left on ted.com are so for this video.
William Ury = Real-life Picard
how sad.. All those places You mentioned GAVE YOU the THIRD EYE on the spot.. Food hospitality and you were confused since ALL THOSE places had been targeted DECADES and still Extended hand and gave peace of their own last bread. how about third eye opener to start HERE.
Amazing. Watching this video from time to time, still far better than others in discussing unity issues. Thank you
Really enjoyed the story in the beginning and the examples throughout the video. What was especially interesting was the story of walking the 'Path of Abraham.'
The example of the woman is wrong....It was a man and the example of the life history that you are giving relates to the life of Hazrat Ali (AS) the cousin of Holy Prophet Muhammed (PBUH).......
@humanist7117 No on the contrary it is quite relevant. The ME is fucked up because people follow that example too. Instead you should say that you are being far too optimistic
Abraham is known for hospitality? o.O
I guess that's not out of touch with the nearly oxymoronic statements in abrahamic religion; Islam is peace, God is love, Jesus is forgiveness.
So, why the title then? When does he explain the walk from no to yes? He just explains "the walk". This video was supposed to be about negotiation, not an Utopian belief.
@MomoTheBellyDancer wow! You completely missed the begining of his talk regarding conflict resolution. Dialogue like yours does nothing but dilute the situation, please take a minute and watch the intro again. The mideast is very religous and Abraham is a central figure that unites them. This guy isnt just some feel good yuppie, he has been a mediator in national negotiations for many many years.
There are plenty of brilliant people in the world, but this clown is not among them. I'm really starting to expect to be disappointed by TED talks these days.
@Zotov13 I noticed the same thing about his eyes & even his mannerisms...He gives off a peaceful vibe even through video.
Really nice talk indeed, too bad that religion divides more than it unites the people...
@aaser018 Is the Catholic church a force for good in the world?
"th-cam.com/video/0kuzYwzGoXw/w-d-xo.html&feature=related"
Stopped listening shortly after he started talking about Abraham. Last thing we need is more religion.
12:04 does anybody know if there is water inside of that roofed area in the center where the woman is sitting? (The Aleppo pic)
I usually enjoy TedTalks. What this guy says about Middle East does not make much sense!