We have 3 kids, two with special needs and one regular. We loved the childhood years but as adults it is now constant heartbreak. Two will need our constant supervision and direction forever and the regular neuro typical child rarely makes contact which breaks our heart. Having kids is no guarantee to future joy so don’t ever feel pressured into having them if you are not up for the constant worry that comes with it.
Am I the only person who hates the term mini me? Children are their own people and I grit my teeth when I hear parents talk about their mini me's. No, Karen, she's not your mini you. Perhaps you should have your own identity and goals and not throw all of them on your child.
Couldn't agree more...children are their own persons, even if they do get traits from their parents. Then parents expect children to do whatever they want without considering that children have their own ideas and feelings which may not coincide with theirs. It is entitlement and also a way of emotional slavery, because parents have so much influence on their children and kids don't have many other places to turn to.
So true I don't understand what kind of pride people get putting pressure and making children follow their guides.Like the child is his own persona.i know so many people my own nephew wants to be animator but his parents keep pushing him to do medicine as she couldn't do it herself,she tried 3 times make him study medicine and now he is so depressed he says he doesn't a thing.ugh such people are so mean towards children honestly.
I don't get the term "Mini me" the offspring has genes from both parents. It's so confusing to hear that, especially from married couple, like one parent see their kid with all of their genetics, but they haven't fully grow yet... Smh... I agree to the comment though
I don't think that I regret not having children, my future of doing whatever I want and sleeping, traveling and living my life is better than pregnancy.
@@Amek909 No, I lived with a baby and he wakes me up at night because he cried every night, he is my nephew, I understand that he is a baby but at the end when I moved out he still with his mom and not with me and I see all the money that people spend on children, diapers, baby food, formula are extremely expensive, I can save all that money in a month, having kids are not going to make me happy or help me with the books that I'm writing, I don't have time to waste on razing a child, I work a lot and I don't think the motherhood or maternity are for me, I hate children's song and tv shows, I hate children screaming or having tantrums, I saw many older children doing that on the supermarket or street, even my nephew don't do that and the most important thing, the body deformation when the baby is out of the body, horrible, disgusting idea of seeing my body like that, I would hate my life after that, hate my body and lost my happiness, I have an ed (ARFID) and a chronical disease that is very painful, pregnancy is going to make it worst. So no kids for me thanks.
@@wmarch88 yeah after a year the baby will sleep throughout the whole night, the first year is pretty hard I admit bc they wake up every 2-3 hours for a feeding but after that year it’s over with. & diapers can be expensive but baby formula is provided by WIC where I’m from so I don’t spend any money on that. As for your career I can see why you wouldn’t want children you need quiet and peace so I understand. Kids aren’t for everybody but you initially said you couldn’t travel or do what you want and that’s wrong, I was just stating that you could. But yeah raising children can be a handful but it’s part of life to most people, I don’t disagree with you tho & besides you said you have health issues so if I were in your position I probably would feel the same. Anyway good luck with your career , may God bless you and give you all the success 🙏🏼
I was speaking to a lady at work yesterday who is now 60. I told her that I do not want kids and her face dropped. She says she regrets not trying to have another child after a miscarriage. She then continued to make me feel bad and said that she sees a baby in my future and that I'll change my mind... Blah blah blah.. It's so rude when people say that. Like, I have made up my mind. Every woman does not want kids! 😤
I'm relatively certain people with children wonder what their life would be like without children. And many are parents are envious of our freedom and independence but of course they will never admit to it.
Appreciate this video. Never could figure out a good reason to have children. I am so grateful that I live in a time that I could make that choice. 72.
No regrets at all! I love the ability to do whatever my husband and I want without having to worry about kids. School recently started back up here and guess what we're doing...going on vacation, because we can! I love our child free life!
I'm so excited for my child free vacation beginning September 3rd-13th. I always take vacations when school is in session 😌I enjoy Aquariums also .....more space please
I am 55 yrs young and have no regrets. My husband and I have a full and contented life. I realize that some may view us as selfish but we are happy. I have not heard a lot of people with 2 or more kids making this claim. It is the most unselfish act to fully think out your goals and dreams with a similar minded person. Sometimes kids are just not in the picture. More people need to understand this!!!
That is great! I never understood why people would say not having kids is selfish? How is it more selfish then having kids? Also, you're living for your own happiness, that is not the same as selfish. Remember,misery needs company.
58 and no regrets at all!! I get to come and go as I please!! I get to travel at the drop of a hat and call my time my own and I love my alone time with, my precious kitty cat!!! 😺
I had my daughter very young, she's 15 now. I love my relationship and having someone who loves me. But I don't want to do it again. You give so much of yourself. It's exhausting. I'm glad she's older now.
I had 4 children. I’m 49. My exhusband was anti kids yet he used them as pawns in our divorce. My regret is I didn’t have more. Let me tell you it’s been very hard one is special needs and one passed by an accident. Even though it’s hard I couldn’t be without them. I respect all women who abstain from children and understand that as passionate as I am others aren’t.
Not only do we need more conversation about the option to have kids or not, but there also needs to be more focus on what would you do if you have a baby with special needs. There’s always a chance that your baby could be born with any number of difficulties, health concerns, or limitations. It’s important to ask yourself how you would be able to handle that. Often times, I think people romanticize parenthood, and get excited for a small toddler who says they love their mom, and holidays, first bike ride, etc. But there is a possibility that you can have that baby that you want (or think you want) but not end up with the lifestyle you’ve envisioned.
Thanks for the video! I do NOT want children and I am tired of older men telling me I'm gonna feel lonely when I age. If you really don't want kids and you know this to be true for you then STAY STRONG. Only you know you.
SO GREATFUL I found your channel and the community here! I'm 49 and ALL my adult life I heard "Oh the motherly gene will kick in" or they look at me like I was a monster when I say I don't want children. My reasons: I don't know what a healthy mom or childhood looks like growing up in abuse and I don't want to put my child through that not knowing what to do or go the opposite direction and spoil them and they turn out mean and selfish. I also NEVER had the desire, I got baby dolls to play with when I was little....but they just sat in my closet. What made it FINAL, was that I had Really bad endometriosis at 32 and not treatments worked so had surgery at 36. I have no regrets since I want to travel the country and bring my drum wellness program to different locations (in peson and virtually). Right now I do a program with seniors and stress relief program for staff and would love to create a program with kids.😁
33 so not 'old' yet,but I can definitely see myself being a happy, relaxed, independent senior without kids in the future. Just booked a vacation to an adultsonly beachresort!
@@frummel403 that’s amazing!!!! Enjoy:) That’s my preference as well, adults only. I don’t hate children but I do prefer to not be around them. I’m 45, I have a 24 year old that wants no kids and I’m all for it.
I'm a man in my 30s now and I still don't want kids, I've felt this way since I was a teenager and I've already been guilt tripped and shamed saying "oh you'll change your mind yet" - I have high functioning autism (Asperger's Syndrome) and I already have enough difficulties with myself let alone a child. I think this is the year I finally get the snip! And here's to hoping I find a child free woman who holds the exact same morals on this stance.
My wife and I are 43 now. Married at 27. Wanted kids but never happened. Doctors said we were healthy but cljust couldnt conceive. Life kept us busy. Attitudes changed when we turned 41. We decided we don't want kids anymore. Not because we don't like kids. It is because our unborn kids arent missing much. World is going crazy by the day and financial system is stacked against them. We are financially well off now and we will enjoy life whay we got
I have three nieces. Two of them have kids and the daddies are not in the picture. One niece is 20 and has no plan for her future...and said to me yesterday that if she gets pregnant...it will all be ok. Her mom and dad will help her out if she just "accidentally" gets pregnant. I did want kids....but now at 44 I feel like I dodged a bullet too! I see my nieces lives...I am mad at my sister and brother in law for not helping their girls out and teaching them that they are more than just baby makers and dependent on a man or the state to take care of them. Now they are adults...and treat getting pregnant like a meal ticket. It is sad. For my future, I don't think I will be alone and sad. I have a rich life with my husband and know other childfree and childless women around my age group. I know that we exist and probably have fuller lives because we don't have kids in the picture. I remember my mother and sister not knowing what to do with themselves when the kids left the nest. Now its about the grand kids to fill their empty void. I don't have a void now because i learned early on not to depend on kids to fill it. I had to be creative and willing to go out and explore socializing outside a family unit to get the knack of making friends and being happy with my interests. I have met amazing people with and without children that add to my life. I don't feel at all depressed about not having children anymore and I now embrace it. It is a small part of who I am. It doesn't make me sad anymore or regret. Each year that goes by I find easier to say that I am childfree and happy. I will always be there for my nieces and kids if they want to hang out and do things, but I am always happy when they go home and its just me and the husband with our two pooches. Life is sweet.
Thank you for sharing your story. I think this is something people will be able to relate to. It can take effort and work to feel comfortable with the childfree life and that’s totally ok. 😃
@@WifeWithoutKids Hey there. I just think that we don't have discussions enough about different ways of life and the cycle of poverty. Poverty is generational. Mindset and how we are brought up is definitely a factor. Nature/Nurture and Environment. I think things are changing now with the internet and connection. I think I was able to break free from that cycle by not having children and exploring different avenues. I was the first in my family to go to college and get my degree in social work. My family on both sides places motherhood at the center of why women exist. If you are not a mother, you basically did it wrong. To me, life just isn't about having kids; I thought it was for a long time, but there is so much more to life. Along with poverty, there is mental and physical abuse. My family has had its struggles with alcohol, drugs, and abusive men. I was married to a very abusive man in my early twenties and luckily didn't have kids and divorced him. Its interesting that I ended up with no kids and did differently than my parents, cousins, and sister. Its silly really that some of them think I am so different and act better than. I don't. Due to my situation, I found a different plan and other options. I was forced to grow in a different way. People tend to fear different. Thats the herd mentality. It took a long time for me to embrace my childless status...and now my childfree status because I thought something was wrong with me or missing from my life. I don't feel that anymore, but it took reframing. I still work on it to this day when I get the negative commentary on my life without for some to even know my story. It is always easier to pick apart someones life that doesn't fit the natural narrative of what is considered "normal". Thank you for the channel. Thanks to the internet and connection we get to be different. And that is OK too!
Very interesting video Hannah!🤗 It's wonderful listening to other people's experiences being childfree! Knowing that there are many childfree people who love their lives even when they are older it's wonderful and very calming 🍃 You make me feel less alien and less alone❤️ 🤗 Thank you as always for creating this beautiful channel and community!
Im definitely weird and I wonder if anyone might be similar. I LOVE babies, tiny squishy lil babies. But I DONT like children. I am a daycare teacher, and think we may foster in the future. I know I would adore the baby phase, but I am truly uninterested and unequipped for older children. I have never met anyone similar.
I noticed that quite often even childfree women wants to emphasize to the world that they DO like children as if it wasn't the case, they might be perceived extra negatively. I think a question "do you like children?" doesn't make sense. It's the same like to ask "do you like adults?" Yes, if they nice, polite and well mannered I like them whether children or adults 😉
I am exactley the same. I like babies, that's why some people tell me "I should have children". But I will not, because I like only babies (and not all of them, only some of them😁)
My mom actually told me I’m smart for not wanting kids! Not sure if she remembers telling me that. 😅 But I’ll never forget that. I definitely love relaxing A LOT - like I take a lot of naps randomly during the day if it’s my day off from work. If anything I see kids more like a burden than a plus. That’s just me though. I know lots of women enjoy being moms. Good for them! Not everyone wants to be a mom. Also my hobbies are important to me. I can fill up my time quite easily, I don’t need a child to fill any “void” thank you lol. 😂 Where I work I see a lot of misbehaved kids and miserable moms too and each time I witness that I am like thank God I’m childfree! XD
So happy to have found this video. I remember the exact moment I decided I did not want children. I wanted freedom to live my life doing what was important to me and that is what I got. At almost 67, I still do not regret that decision. I have run an animal rescue for the past 22 years and get all the nurturing I need from them.
Your TH-cam channel is my happy place!!! 😊🌼🤸♀️🤸♀️🤸♀️😄😄😄 I feel so calm and happy every time I watch your videos! I feel like there's a connection of people out there who think that life can be absolutely wonderful in so many ways - without having to put kids into the world! I love this channel so much!
I'm NOT taking care of my parents when they're old. Dad was never in the picture and I moved out of my mom's when I was 13. She hardly noticed. If my state has laws requiring me to cover their medical expenses, I'll leave the country.
Great to hear the experiences of these women and everyone in the comments.😃It's reassuring to hear from people who are on the same page. Thanks Hannah!
I have 2 daughters and have told them that if they choose not to have kids, I am 100% ok with that and they will not get any pressure from me. I have a son whose wife just had a baby and I love my grandson, but they do struggle with daycare and finances. It's just the reality of having kids.
Me and my wife don't want kids, we have I have 31 years old and she have 29 years old, we always hear from family and friends that we will change our minds I HATE those comments, and I won't change my mind!!
I’m 28 and I’m on the fence about having kids which is why I’ve been watching your channel. I keep thinking “maybe later when my life is more put together”. I’ve started to realize I may just not have any or may have or adopt them later in life. For now my focus is on getting a dog in the near future. ❤
I'm in my 60s. I don't regret not having kids. I'm happy being single & childfree. I also have 3 close childfree friends, 2 are in their 50s & 1 friend, is nearly 60. We all have pets, cats & dogs. Our lives are great. 😊👍😸🐶⛵♥️
I have a great fear of being old and alone but also no desire for children. I know children are no guarantee for avoiding loneliness in old age, but looking at the generation above it does seem like the better bet; my parents, aunts and uncles and family friends with children seem like they have a much stronger community around them than my uncle who did not have children. I love my uncle but he recently told me how when he needed to get a medical treatment recently he literally had no one to drive him home after (he lives in another state)! It broke my heart. I know there are lots of ways to keep building community as a childfree person in older age, but I'm just working through this fear!
I understand your fear. But please remember that having a family (aka kids) does not automatically mean that you'll have a good bond with them. Or that they'll be there for you. Build your own community of people around you and be nice and kind to others. That will increase your chances of having people help you out when you're old.
I'm 72 & never had kids. I understand your concern about being older & needing a little help. I think we all feel that. But, truthfully, w/ my friends who have children...their kids are mostly in another state so they would not be available to help w/ a drive home from a medical procedure anyway. The best way to deal w/ situations like that is to help w/ these kinds of issues w/ your friends & then they can help you when you need it.
Do not be misled by these other people commenting here. I am reaching out to let you know that your instincts are correct. How can you build a community by not inputting your contribution to it? Embrace having a family. It can be thankless and may ultimately leave you feeling alone in the end (no guarantees), but you can never regret the unique person who you have brought this world. This is how community is built, not in forums with strangers but in your home with many thankless days you will never regret.
I would imagine Hannah in your 80s will have silvery short hair, not long hair. Wonder what u'll be thinking when u watch this video 40 years from now 😂
Thanks for creating this channel and sharing these topics. I'm in my late thirties and single and whilst dating I've been encountering a lot of single fathers or men who really want children. After a difficult few years I'm not totally sure but I'm feeling indifferent currently to having children, it just hasn't been my focus. Mostly I'd really like my own successful business and a loving, compatible faithful partner. I already find housework etc tiring so I'm not sure how I'd fit children into my life.
It's such an important conversation to have. Deciding whether or not to have kids is a huge decision and it helps to be able to have communities where real conversations about it happen.
I knew early on that I didn't really want kids. When I was in my early 20's, all my co-workers were having babies and would bring them in to meet us. Everyone would go crazy and want to pick the baby up. I always thought kids were cute, but I never really got that excited over them. However, when a friend would ask me if I wanted to meet their new puppy, cat or horse -- that was a different story. I love animals and have always had a dog or cat in my life, and I have zero regrets about not having children. I don't mean to sound crazy, but I feel like having kids isn't really for everyone and that's ok. I feel the same way about people who tell me they would never want to get a dog or a cat. It's better to make your choice and own it than to live an unhappy life because you tried to conform to what everyone else says is "normal".
Contemplating. Who will take care in old age. Relatives and friends will fade out slowly. So practically, is it possible without anyone taking them to hospital
We couldn't have kids. My wife had type one diabetes. The child we conceived almost killed her, destroyed her kidneys and put her on dialysis. She always wanted kids and the grief even 16 years later is almost unbearable to see. I wouldn't wish this on anyone. As I have gotten older I am faced more and more with the realization that even though I had discounted it and tell my friends I dodged a bullet, I am grieving our empty house. I don't know how to help her or myself get through.
I’m so sorry that you both had to go through this experience. Life can be very devastating at times. You are welcome in this community. Hoping you both will find healing. ❤️🩹
55 and no regrets really but being here in the buckle of the Bible belt makes it challenging sometimes because EVERYone has kids in these small towns around here so I feel like a freak sometimes but deep down I really never had that deep desire like my mom did plus I have A.D.D./Major depression so I just don't think I could handle it. I loved my young adult years....I was so free to travel around with a band and go anywhere anytime and I did just that! It was fun. Plus I value my sleep and don't think I could work and raise children plus handle a husband. I've been a public school music teach off and on for 30 years and have seen single moms with problems like mine or worse, struggling and their kids suffering with problems as a result and I'm so glad I bypassed all that. As a teacher I have experienced the effect of messed up kids due to parent's poor choices like using drugs during pregnancy, or alcohol, etc. No thanks!
Both my wife and I think kids are wonderful, but we never wanted to have any. We do appreciate their precious moments of exploring their surroundings with good intentions, grand innocents, curiosities abounding, and that cute child like naïvetés which delivers a good warm hearted moment like nothing else. But with kids you can count those moments with one hand, Both my wife and I prefer watching those kid moments on TV family shows so we can shut off when we've had enough. Then it's off to Monte Carlo to enjoy our life's success that was not stymied by having any of those disgusting self defecating spoiled things.
I wonder, where do they find those amazing men that DON'T want children??? I am childfree since a very early age. I never felt pressured by my patents,they completely support me. I've been in relationships a few times with very good men. But it had ALWAYS ended in me leaving them exactly because of their future goals. They all wanted to have kids in the future😭 so we had to say goodbye. One even called me back in one year with a question if i hadn't changed my mind(it makes me angry!) I met a few men in my life, who said they did not want to have children(i was NOT in a relationship with them, just knew them), but one of them was a narcissist, another was a person with a very low social status, the third was just very bitter and angry at the world. All those are not an option for me. Or for anyone normal for a relationship at all 😅 So my question is real.
NOPE // NADA zero regrets esp. in 'this' climate of greed and not taking care of those already in need like the thousands of children in foster care and adoption systems. Also so happy that I knew when a young teen and was lucky to never have stress from family. In this day n' age of our escalating issues from an ill planet due to humans and corporations constant greedy decisions.
I think it's important to do what we can to try and preserve our precious planet. There should be enough resources to go around, but yes, human nature can be pretty greedy.
i have twins as 1st child 2 adorables girls (is it soo difficult but so grateful to have them ) Since i got them it s very happy and full life but with all the struggles To taise kid they are 15 months old I started to build for them the best future I can ( trying to buy 2 condos for each girls for later in their 30s) so much love and happy moment for now and hope it ll continue I finally got a goal in my life provide protect and be the better version of me for my kids I m 35 and kinda old but I ll endure it no more social meeting and event but I m okay with that since all my friend got multiple kids
No. Had an abusive husband very early in life, and disgustingly took life away from me👶. Taught me a valuable lesson. What I see what’s plays out in my environment also, so my conclusion is someone above was watching over me.
When there’s over 8 billion people in the world 🌎 and many parents are NOT up for the challenges of parenting -let alone the cost- childless people should be praised. The planet doesn’t have room anyway.
That’s not true at all the birth rate is getting dangerously low in many places. I personally don’t care if people have kids but overpopulation is a myth.
Is it? Is overpopulation a myth to all the sentient beings that die or a left as refugees after we tear down their homes, clear the land and build houses on it? Are people all that matter to you? What about the creatures that have been wiped off the face of the planet due to habitat destruction? Overpopulation is not a myth and there is no scenario where billions more humans is a good thing on a planet of finite resources and with so much unique wildlife that also have a right to life.
And the parents who have kids that won’t help them when they’re old. My friend has 5 and 1 helps her. The first one. She regrets having them at 73- except the one who helps her.
Don’t regret it. Oftentimes they move to some other area, country or state entirely, or judge you, or blame you for your divorce from the dad, or are just plain a-holes that you can’t believe you’re related to. Or their spouse is weird and influences them not in a good way. So many negatives. Abandonment. I’ve heard and experienced some of this. No matter how much you gave of yourself it goes wrong. Enjoy the peace of mind without them.
@@richie9878keep telling yourself that. Kids aren't for everyone and if I ever had kids they would end up in the hands of dcf or the police. You don't need kids for love you need to love yourself
@@The_unknown269 sure but quickly find out actually raising them is one of the most selfless things anyone can do with their lives. And when they are old and have many kids and grandkids that love them it’s a sense of fulfillment that is hard to match
Over 50 AND childfree? Now that's the type of woman I would like in a life partner, only because they are confident in who they are, they know what they want (and what they don't want), and they play no head games (unless it's "Head Games" by Foreigner). As for regrets on being childfree by choice, I have none because you can never miss what you never had.
Being childfree at 71, 1 thing I wish I had known sooner & now advise any young woman who's positive she won't be having kids: don't marry, move in with, heck if possible don't even fall in love with an alpha/strong-willed/bossy partner. Because espec. for old females who are living with an old alpha, your only advocate (& unfortunately sometimes protection from the partner) will be an alpha/bossy son or son-in-law. Because if your old alpha partner is male & becoming even more stubborn & unreasonable, the only person there's a chance of him listening to is your alpha son or son-in-law. (I know of one case of an alpha daughter helping her elderly mom but it's rare; most old alpha males will only listen to someone with that all-important 3rd leg.) So it's sad and shouldn't be the case, but take it from me: it is most of the time. You have been warned.
If someone truely loves children, then they can do a lot of community service by raising funds for orphan kids, children with disabilities, or children coming from abusive households. Someone necessarily doesn't have to be a biological parent in order to prove their love for children. I don't even want to adopt lol! I can do the said first thing in order to prove my love for them.
I wanted to have children, but health problems and failed traumatising IVF made me opt for “it is time to stop with this stress and finally live my life childfree”. Perhaps I could have gotten a baby with my next IVF tentative, but I am too exhausted to continue. Anyway, I do not have the urge to have kids anymore, all I have been through killed all the sparkle I had inside.
I'm a man who felt the same way, I was not into having kids until my friend had a daughter and I helped raise her. Boy was I ever wrong!!! That baby made me laugh every day, I bonded with her and never loved anyone more. Take it from a former kid hater, you don't know the love you are missing out on
I'm 64, never married no children. It's weird I never really wanted kids myself, but now at this age I think it would have been nice to have grandchildren. Of course you can't skip that step in the middle.
My neighbors spent 15 years together, building a company and making a lot of money never wanting kids. When they decided let's have kids she couldn't get pregnant. He left her with a 25 y old young model. She was jobless and lost.. After 2 y she finds a man that makes her go crazy about family, I don't know how but things like this always happen. You spend a decade with wrong people and wrong beliefs and suddenly you find yourself with 3 kids a big house and a lot of dreams. Life is all about Good and Bad timing. Chill out
Hi Hannah! Have you or Michael talked in a video about permanent birth control options? This is something I'm looking into as a male in my 20s and would love your perspective!
Thank you for this video. I’m aware & at timers know I’m not relatable with many of my family members, I hope one day ‘a’ family member may ask me “what was your life like w/out kids?” Interesting & affordable.
I have never wanted or having the urge to have children. My mother is a alcoholic, and so was my father. Both me and my sister struggle with anxiety dissorder. She just had a child, and is now having a total mental breakdown. Sleeps 2 hours a day. My advice to people out there who do want children is that you need a SOLID support system around you. You AND your spouce need to be of good mental and physical health. You don`t need to be perfect, some minor issues is ok. But this is going to be F¤cking hard. We are talking about zero sleep for years on end, and maby having a child with issues. If you are not mentaly, economicaly, physicaly prepared for this then most likely having a child is not for you. Also be aware the fact that the divorce rate is 53%. You are MOST likely over the time of 10 years going to be divorced. If you spouce or partner is a narcissist/addict/asshole etc then PLEASE DON`T MAKE THEM A CHILD AND FIND A HEALTHY PARTNER TO DO IT, OR DON`T!. if you don`t know what a narcissist is or know about addiction then educate yourself on it. You are not entitelded to be a parent even if the world tells you this " story". Have respect for the child and it`s rights.
Damn ..this is the saddest video and comments I've seen all day and I just saw one about a bunch of kids killed in Gaza. By the way some here probably love that sort of thing.
Hello i recently found your channel,i am from asia and not having children is very looked down on here saying"who will take care lol" we will be so poor when old( I am 37 already haha idk why they still bother). I wanted to ask how to save for the old age?as we know that a lot of time we get sick and hospitals takes a lot of money,my country is not that safe so I do not want to put all money in house.if you could just give over view of how to plan for it,like the money saving.I would be really grateful.
We have chosen to invest our money in multiple areas just to have a more diverse portfolio. Real estate, retirement savings, tax free savings account, work match programs, stocks, etc…. Each country has their own unique terms for these options so you’d just have to look into what your country offers. It can get complicated pretty quickly as there’s so much information to wade through, but good luck!
I had a Girl she is 8 … I was so afraid to have a kid … but I was in love … and I need it a reason to live since life can be lonely… Being a dad is the best feeling ever … yes I was afraid but with faith and praying and hard work you can become a parent … and most important Love in Christ… I can say I am part of being a parent and I have planted my share in this life … I admire those that don’t want kids …I thought like that once but I put all confort things a parent free life has to offer … To do God’s will … Why I am writing this … to those that plan to have kids … but don’t want no kids now … I understand how you feel … But being a parent has gave me a reason to live has made me stronger and a better person … I know there is a lot responsibilities but is worth it … to have a reason to live …
So what would you say to a guy who just doesn’t care of either eventuality? I sort of learned what It takes to be a great parent, but mainly cause I assumed I’d end up dating someone who wanted them, since that’s the majority. So wouldn’t you know, fate decides to give me the minority and so I’ve been dating a girl for a year that ended up being completely child free. I sort of brought up not minding kids early on in the relationship before i knew about that, but again it was cause I wanted to attract her, not really because I’m crazy about them. But now because of that, it’s really hard to convince her that I’d be happy being child free with her, because of the few things I said early on. Part of me thinks this is a new decision she’s made somewhat recently because she never once rebutted my talks about it during the first few months. How could I talk to her about this? Like if she changed her mind, I wouldn’t mind. If she changed her mind, but was infertile, I wouldn’t mind. If she stayed on this path, I wouldn’t mind. It’s hard to give her a hard “no” to wanting kids, cause I’ve never really thought of that as my choice as a man I guess. I’m only 23, she’s 25 and I never thought about this that deeply before so I’m struggling on how to convey my feelings :S This was half an actual question, and half just me trying to put my thoughts of this into words, so no prob if no reply 😅
I think just being honest about how you feel right now is a good place to be. Sometimes things change and sometimes they don't, but time is usually a good indicator of how things will turn out. If you both know where the other stands it's a great starting point.
📢📢📢 Hannah I soooo wish you 'would' set up a CDN based dating service for only those 'proven' to be without and zero desire to have kids. Especially here in BC please, haha.
What's with older, single people and saying they have to live on their own? Just find some fellow roommates your own age. *shrug* That's what my ex-boyfriend's mom did a few years ago in her early-70s when she was separated from her husband.
I noticed my friends without children are the eternal Peter Pan and the women are the Wendys. I love them but they a limited understanding of their friends with children and grandchildren. Most of their conversations have to do with depression. They have a hard time accepting turning old.
I'm 49 and have no regrets. I love being child free!
Thanks for sharing. 😄
At that age your kid wouldn’t be a child anymore 😂
You’re lucky.
Wait till you are 80
Suree 😂
I'm 85. When I look back I think having children is the scariest thing could that could have happened to me.
I like kid's, but never wanted my own. Knew this since I was 17. Now at 60, there has NEVER been a moment of regret. Keep up the great vid's!
It’s always great to hear from people who know at such a young age that they don’t want to be parents and have no regrets.
I decided to be childfree when I was 17 too I'm still 17 lol but feels good to know that I'm not too young to know my own mind.
You'll change your mind when you're older.
@@autobotrock4789 lol he's 60, I think he would have regretted it by now if ever XD
My life is shallow and empty without kids and no legacy!
We have 3 kids, two with special needs and one regular. We loved the childhood years but as adults it is now constant heartbreak. Two will need our constant supervision and direction forever and the regular neuro typical child rarely makes contact which breaks our heart. Having kids is no guarantee to future joy so don’t ever feel pressured into having them if you are not up for the constant worry that comes with it.
Am I the only person who hates the term mini me? Children are their own people and I grit my teeth when I hear parents talk about their mini me's. No, Karen, she's not your mini you. Perhaps you should have your own identity and goals and not throw all of them on your child.
I don’t even know anyone that refers to their kids like that!
Couldn't agree more...children are their own persons, even if they do get traits from their parents. Then parents expect children to do whatever they want without considering that children have their own ideas and feelings which may not coincide with theirs. It is entitlement and also a way of emotional slavery, because parents have so much influence on their children and kids don't have many other places to turn to.
I absolutely agree with you! Children are their own person!
So true I don't understand what kind of pride people get putting pressure and making children follow their guides.Like the child is his own persona.i know so many people my own nephew wants to be animator but his parents keep pushing him to do medicine as she couldn't do it herself,she tried 3 times make him study medicine and now he is so depressed he says he doesn't a thing.ugh such people are so mean towards children honestly.
I don't get the term "Mini me" the offspring has genes from both parents. It's so confusing to hear that, especially from married couple, like one parent see their kid with all of their genetics, but they haven't fully grow yet... Smh... I agree to the comment though
I don't think that I regret not having children, my future of doing whatever I want and sleeping, traveling and living my life is better than pregnancy.
It’s good to enjoy life!
You can do all that while having kids just saying
@@Amek909 No, I lived with a baby and he wakes me up at night because he cried every night, he is my nephew, I understand that he is a baby but at the end when I moved out he still with his mom and not with me and I see all the money that people spend on children, diapers, baby food, formula are extremely expensive, I can save all that money in a month, having kids are not going to make me happy or help me with the books that I'm writing, I don't have time to waste on razing a child, I work a lot and I don't think the motherhood or maternity are for me, I hate children's song and tv shows, I hate children screaming or having tantrums, I saw many older children doing that on the supermarket or street, even my nephew don't do that and the most important thing, the body deformation when the baby is out of the body, horrible, disgusting idea of seeing my body like that, I would hate my life after that, hate my body and lost my happiness, I have an ed (ARFID) and a chronical disease that is very painful, pregnancy is going to make it worst. So no kids for me thanks.
@@Amek909 no you can't HAHAHAH maybe if you were a d3adb3at father you could.
@@wmarch88 yeah after a year the baby will sleep throughout the whole night, the first year is pretty hard I admit bc they wake up every 2-3 hours for a feeding but after that year it’s over with. & diapers can be expensive but baby formula is provided by WIC where I’m from so I don’t spend any money on that. As for your career I can see why you wouldn’t want children you need quiet and peace so I understand. Kids aren’t for everybody but you initially said you couldn’t travel or do what you want and that’s wrong, I was just stating that you could. But yeah raising children can be a handful but it’s part of life to most people, I don’t disagree with you tho & besides you said you have health issues so if I were in your position I probably would feel the same. Anyway good luck with your career , may God bless you and give you all the success 🙏🏼
I was speaking to a lady at work yesterday who is now 60. I told her that I do not want kids and her face dropped. She says she regrets not trying to have another child after a miscarriage. She then continued to make me feel bad and said that she sees a baby in my future and that I'll change my mind... Blah blah blah.. It's so rude when people say that. Like, I have made up my mind. Every woman does not want kids! 😤
It seems that people still have a lot of assumptions about women and children and that they must always go hand in hand.
Damn.. that lady stepped out of line! Seems like she's projecting her own regrets on you, really unfair and rude.
@@WifeWithoutKids exactly! Luckily, your videos help me feel like I'm not alone 🤗❣️
@@frummel403 IKR... People think it's ok to ask why don't you have kids. That's like me asking them why they chose to 😂
I'm relatively certain people with children wonder what their life would be like without children. And many are parents are envious of our freedom and independence but of course they will never admit to it.
71 No regrets. I do know many people WITH children who DO regret having children. Yes, I'm smug. VERY SMUG!
Appreciate this video. Never could figure out a good reason to have children. I am so grateful that I live in a time that I could make that choice. 72.
Thanks for sharing!!
No regrets at all! I love the ability to do whatever my husband and I want without having to worry about kids. School recently started back up here and guess what we're doing...going on vacation, because we can! I love our child free life!
Yay for vacation time! 😻
You go girl. You've got my dream life
I'm so excited for my child free vacation beginning September 3rd-13th. I always take vacations when school is in session 😌I enjoy Aquariums also .....more space please
You go chick. I wish I could go on vacation. Except I can't not because of kids but because there's something always getting in the way.
I have 2 kids and I can also take vacations?
Children are no longer the way they use to be.
I am 55 yrs young and have no regrets. My husband and I have a full and contented life. I realize that some may view us as selfish but we are happy. I have not heard a lot of people with 2 or more kids making this claim. It is the most unselfish act to fully think out your goals and dreams with a similar minded person. Sometimes kids are just not in the picture. More people need to understand this!!!
That is great! I never understood why people would say not having kids is selfish? How is it more selfish then having kids? Also, you're living for your own happiness, that is not the same as selfish. Remember,misery needs company.
Taking the time to really thing about our choices is so important. 🙌
@@frummel403 yea there's nothing more selfish than child rearing 🤦
But who’s gonna take care of you when you get really old and your husband is not there? Would you wanna go to home care?
@@amiinaden4132 Even people with kids do not get the consideration and care from their children.
Another great video. Nearly 57, knew from about 8 years that I never wanted children. Happily married for 25 years!
Wonderful! Congratulations. 👏😃
58 and no regrets at all!! I get to come and go as I please!! I get to travel at the drop of a hat and call my time my own and I love my alone time with, my precious kitty cat!!! 😺
Sounds like you are enjoying life to the fullest. 👍
@@WifeWithoutKids Yep. I sure am.👍
Your children would be grown by now anyway.
By the time I’m 58 my kids will be 33 so I’ll be able to do the same 👏🏼😂🙏🏼
@@Amek909 Nah. You'll be the baby sitter. Wanna bet?
I had my daughter very young, she's 15 now. I love my relationship and having someone who loves me. But I don't want to do it again. You give so much of yourself. It's exhausting. I'm glad she's older now.
Thank you for sharing this.
I had 4 children. I’m 49. My exhusband was anti kids yet he used them as pawns in our divorce. My regret is I didn’t have more. Let me tell you it’s been very hard one is special needs and one passed by an accident. Even though it’s hard I couldn’t be without them. I respect all women who abstain from children and understand that as passionate as I am others aren’t.
I'm sorry about the tough times you've faced in life and glad that your children were able to be the positive spots in your life.
Lol if you were really happy you wouldn't be in childfree channel
I prefer to regret not having children when I'm old than regret having them my whole life .....
I think so too.
Not only do we need more conversation about the option to have kids or not, but there also needs to be more focus on what would you do if you have a baby with special needs.
There’s always a chance that your baby could be born with any number of difficulties, health concerns, or limitations. It’s important to ask yourself how you would be able to handle that. Often times, I think people romanticize parenthood, and get excited for a small toddler who says they love their mom, and holidays, first bike ride, etc. But there is a possibility that you can have that baby that you want (or think you want) but not end up with the lifestyle you’ve envisioned.
100% yes! Some of these things are tough to talk about, but we still need to have the conversations.
Very true. Or people also go through miscarriages and still borns. It’s important to consider all the possibilities.
I love your videos Hannah. As a man without children I have so much respect for women that choose to be childfree.
Thank you!
Thanks for the video! I do NOT want children and I am tired of older men telling me I'm gonna feel lonely when I age. If you really don't want kids and you know this to be true for you then STAY STRONG. Only you know you.
I love kids but have 0 regrets, and I'm almost 70.
So good to hear.
No regrets either and I am 66.
No regrets at 71 either!
SO GREATFUL I found your channel and the community here! I'm 49 and ALL my adult life I heard "Oh the motherly gene will kick in" or they look at me like I was a monster when I say I don't want children. My reasons: I don't know what a healthy mom or childhood looks like growing up in abuse and I don't want to put my child through that not knowing what to do or go the opposite direction and spoil them and they turn out mean and selfish. I also NEVER had the desire, I got baby dolls to play with when I was little....but they just sat in my closet. What made it FINAL, was that I had Really bad endometriosis at 32 and not treatments worked so had surgery at 36. I have no regrets since I want to travel the country and bring my drum wellness program to different locations (in peson and virtually). Right now I do a program with seniors and stress relief program for staff and would love to create a program with kids.😁
Your program sounds like it would help a lot of people. Good for you!
as a guy, it's really nice to hear women talk about this.
Thanks.
33 so not 'old' yet,but I can definitely see myself being a happy, relaxed, independent senior without kids in the future. Just booked a vacation to an adultsonly beachresort!
Enjoy every moment of your vacation!
@@WifeWithoutKids thank you 😁❤
@@frummel403 that’s amazing!!!! Enjoy:) That’s my preference as well, adults only. I don’t hate children but I do prefer to not be around them. I’m 45, I have a 24 year old that wants no kids and I’m all for it.
By the time your a senior your kids ain’t kids anymore , they would be adults 🤦🏻♂️😂😂
@@Amek909 Haha no, because I'm not having any kids so by the time I'm a senior I'd still be childfree. Without a care in the world!
I'm a man in my 30s now and I still don't want kids, I've felt this way since I was a teenager and I've already been guilt tripped and shamed saying "oh you'll change your mind yet" - I have high functioning autism (Asperger's Syndrome) and I already have enough difficulties with myself let alone a child. I think this is the year I finally get the snip! And here's to hoping I find a child free woman who holds the exact same morals on this stance.
My wife and I are 43 now. Married at 27. Wanted kids but never happened. Doctors said we were healthy but cljust couldnt conceive. Life kept us busy. Attitudes changed when we turned 41. We decided we don't want kids anymore. Not because we don't like kids. It is because our unborn kids arent missing much. World is going crazy by the day and financial system is stacked against them. We are financially well off now and we will enjoy life whay we got
I have three nieces. Two of them have kids and the daddies are not in the picture. One niece is 20 and has no plan for her future...and said to me yesterday that if she gets pregnant...it will all be ok. Her mom and dad will help her out if she just "accidentally" gets pregnant. I did want kids....but now at 44 I feel like I dodged a bullet too! I see my nieces lives...I am mad at my sister and brother in law for not helping their girls out and teaching them that they are more than just baby makers and dependent on a man or the state to take care of them. Now they are adults...and treat getting pregnant like a meal ticket. It is sad. For my future, I don't think I will be alone and sad. I have a rich life with my husband and know other childfree and childless women around my age group. I know that we exist and probably have fuller lives because we don't have kids in the picture. I remember my mother and sister not knowing what to do with themselves when the kids left the nest. Now its about the grand kids to fill their empty void. I don't have a void now because i learned early on not to depend on kids to fill it. I had to be creative and willing to go out and explore socializing outside a family unit to get the knack of making friends and being happy with my interests. I have met amazing people with and without children that add to my life. I don't feel at all depressed about not having children anymore and I now embrace it. It is a small part of who I am. It doesn't make me sad anymore or regret. Each year that goes by I find easier to say that I am childfree and happy. I will always be there for my nieces and kids if they want to hang out and do things, but I am always happy when they go home and its just me and the husband with our two pooches. Life is sweet.
Thank you for sharing your story. I think this is something people will be able to relate to. It can take effort and work to feel comfortable with the childfree life and that’s totally ok. 😃
@@WifeWithoutKids Hey there. I just think that we don't have discussions enough about different ways of life and the cycle of poverty. Poverty is generational. Mindset and how we are brought up is definitely a factor. Nature/Nurture and Environment. I think things are changing now with the internet and connection. I think I was able to break free from that cycle by not having children and exploring different avenues. I was the first in my family to go to college and get my degree in social work. My family on both sides places motherhood at the center of why women exist. If you are not a mother, you basically did it wrong. To me, life just isn't about having kids; I thought it was for a long time, but there is so much more to life. Along with poverty, there is mental and physical abuse. My family has had its struggles with alcohol, drugs, and abusive men. I was married to a very abusive man in my early twenties and luckily didn't have kids and divorced him. Its interesting that I ended up with no kids and did differently than my parents, cousins, and sister. Its silly really that some of them think I am so different and act better than. I don't. Due to my situation, I found a different plan and other options. I was forced to grow in a different way. People tend to fear different. Thats the herd mentality. It took a long time for me to embrace my childless status...and now my childfree status because I thought something was wrong with me or missing from my life. I don't feel that anymore, but it took reframing. I still work on it to this day when I get the negative commentary on my life without for some to even know my story. It is always easier to pick apart someones life that doesn't fit the natural narrative of what is considered "normal". Thank you for the channel. Thanks to the internet and connection we get to be different. And that is OK too!
My sister has 2 kids and she always tells me don't have kids with a miserable look on her face 😖. She can't stand her own kids 🤨
Aw, that doesn't sound like a very happy and fulfilling life.
@@WifeWithoutKids well she chose to have kids she's a single mom... No surprise 🤨
Very interesting video Hannah!🤗
It's wonderful listening to other people's experiences being childfree!
Knowing that there are many childfree people who love their lives even when they are older it's wonderful and very calming 🍃
You make me feel less alien and less alone❤️ 🤗
Thank you as always for creating this beautiful channel and community!
I totally agree. It's great to be part of a community and know that we are making the same choice. We all get to support each other.
Child free by choice and proud 🌹🌹🌹I’ll be a great auntie 😊😊
Girl... The Auntie life is where it's at! 😎
Auntie life has been enjoyable.
Great channel and another brilliant video, thank you Hannah 👌🏻
Thank you so much.
Im definitely weird and I wonder if anyone might be similar. I LOVE babies, tiny squishy lil babies. But I DONT like children. I am a daycare teacher, and think we may foster in the future. I know I would adore the baby phase, but I am truly uninterested and unequipped for older children. I have never met anyone similar.
It’s good to be unique. 😃
I noticed that quite often even childfree women wants to emphasize to the world that they DO like children as if it wasn't the case, they might be perceived extra negatively. I think a question "do you like children?" doesn't make sense. It's the same like to ask "do you like adults?" Yes, if they nice, polite and well mannered I like them whether children or adults 😉
Me toooo
I am exactley the same. I like babies, that's why some people tell me "I should have children". But I will not, because I like only babies (and not all of them, only some of them😁)
My mom actually told me I’m smart for not wanting kids! Not sure if she remembers telling me that. 😅 But I’ll never forget that. I definitely love relaxing A LOT - like I take a lot of naps randomly during the day if it’s my day off from work. If anything I see kids more like a burden than a plus. That’s just me though. I know lots of women enjoy being moms. Good for them! Not everyone wants to be a mom. Also my hobbies are important to me. I can fill up my time quite easily, I don’t need a child to fill any “void” thank you lol. 😂 Where I work I see a lot of misbehaved kids and miserable moms too and each time I witness that I am like thank God I’m childfree! XD
So happy to have found this video. I remember the exact moment I decided I did not want children. I wanted freedom to live my life doing what was important to me and that is what I got. At almost 67, I still do not regret that decision. I have run an animal rescue for the past 22 years and get all the nurturing I need from them.
Your TH-cam channel is my happy place!!! 😊🌼🤸♀️🤸♀️🤸♀️😄😄😄 I feel so calm and happy every time I watch your videos! I feel like there's a connection of people out there who think that life can be absolutely wonderful in so many ways - without having to put kids into the world! I love this channel so much!
So happy to have you as part of our community!
I'm NOT taking care of my parents when they're old. Dad was never in the picture and I moved out of my mom's when I was 13. She hardly noticed. If my state has laws requiring me to cover their medical expenses, I'll leave the country.
Great to hear the experiences of these women and everyone in the comments.😃It's reassuring to hear from people who are on the same page. Thanks Hannah!
So welcome!
I have 2 daughters and have told them that if they choose not to have kids, I am 100% ok with that and they will not get any pressure from me. I have a son whose wife just had a baby and I love my grandson, but they do struggle with daycare and finances. It's just the reality of having kids.
Me and my wife don't want kids, we have I have 31 years old and she have 29 years old, we always hear from family and friends that we will change our minds I HATE those comments, and I won't change my mind!!
I’m 28 and I’m on the fence about having kids which is why I’ve been watching your channel. I keep thinking “maybe later when my life is more put together”. I’ve started to realize I may just not have any or may have or adopt them later in life. For now my focus is on getting a dog in the near future. ❤
Nope, don't regret it and still happily married 32plus years later ❤️
I'm in my 60s. I don't regret not having kids. I'm happy being single & childfree. I also have 3 close childfree friends, 2 are in their 50s & 1 friend, is nearly 60. We all have pets, cats & dogs. Our lives are great. 😊👍😸🐶⛵♥️
Love this!
@@WifeWithoutKids Thank you. 👍
51 and free…I knew young and baby sat and kids love me. All is good.
Nice!
I have a great fear of being old and alone but also no desire for children. I know children are no guarantee for avoiding loneliness in old age, but looking at the generation above it does seem like the better bet; my parents, aunts and uncles and family friends with children seem like they have a much stronger community around them than my uncle who did not have children. I love my uncle but he recently told me how when he needed to get a medical treatment recently he literally had no one to drive him home after (he lives in another state)! It broke my heart. I know there are lots of ways to keep building community as a childfree person in older age, but I'm just working through this fear!
I understand your fear. But please remember that having a family (aka kids) does not automatically mean that you'll have a good bond with them. Or that they'll be there for you. Build your own community of people around you and be nice and kind to others. That will increase your chances of having people help you out when you're old.
It’s a fear you can definitely work through. Good for you for taking time to do that.
I'm 72 & never had kids. I understand your concern about being older & needing a little help. I think we all feel that. But, truthfully, w/ my friends who have children...their kids are mostly in another state so they would not be available to help w/ a drive home from a medical procedure anyway. The best way to deal w/ situations like that is to help w/ these kinds of issues w/ your friends & then they can help you when you need it.
But one can have children who are living overseas. So even if you are sick, there will be no one to fetch you too in old age.
Do not be misled by these other people commenting here. I am reaching out to let you know that your instincts are correct. How can you build a community by not inputting your contribution to it? Embrace having a family. It can be thankless and may ultimately leave you feeling alone in the end (no guarantees), but you can never regret the unique person who you have brought this world. This is how community is built, not in forums with strangers but in your home with many thankless days you will never regret.
29 and I do not want kids
Childfree is a great option!
Same 😊
I would imagine Hannah in your 80s will have silvery short hair, not long hair.
Wonder what u'll be thinking when u watch this video 40 years from now 😂
Yes, my hair probably won’t be long, but my photo editing skills are limited so… 🤷🏻♀️ 😂
Thanks for creating this channel and sharing these topics. I'm in my late thirties and single and whilst dating I've been encountering a lot of single fathers or men who really want children. After a difficult few years I'm not totally sure but I'm feeling indifferent currently to having children, it just hasn't been my focus. Mostly I'd really like my own successful business and a loving, compatible faithful partner. I already find housework etc tiring so I'm not sure how I'd fit children into my life.
It's such an important conversation to have. Deciding whether or not to have kids is a huge decision and it helps to be able to have communities where real conversations about it happen.
I knew early on that I didn't really want kids. When I was in my early 20's, all my co-workers were having babies and would bring them in to meet us. Everyone would go crazy and want to pick the baby up. I always thought kids were cute, but I never really got that excited over them. However, when a friend would ask me if I wanted to meet their new puppy, cat or horse -- that was a different story. I love animals and have always had a dog or cat in my life, and I have zero regrets about not having children. I don't mean to sound crazy, but I feel like having kids isn't really for everyone and that's ok. I feel the same way about people who tell me they would never want to get a dog or a cat. It's better to make your choice and own it than to live an unhappy life because you tried to conform to what everyone else says is "normal".
Exactly right. And you’re not crazy at all!
Contemplating. Who will take care in old age. Relatives and friends will fade out slowly. So practically, is it possible without anyone taking them to hospital
Hello, I am new here... I'm 40 and 6mo yo and have to make the decision soon...😅🎉 Happy Holidays to all.
We couldn't have kids. My wife had type one diabetes. The child we conceived almost killed her, destroyed her kidneys and put her on dialysis. She always wanted kids and the grief even 16 years later is almost unbearable to see. I wouldn't wish this on anyone. As I have gotten older I am faced more and more with the realization that even though I had discounted it and tell my friends I dodged a bullet, I am grieving our empty house. I don't know how to help her or myself get through.
I’m so sorry that you both had to go through this experience. Life can be very devastating at times. You are welcome in this community. Hoping you both will find healing. ❤️🩹
you’re so pretty!!! I 💙 your videos!!!!
Aw, thank you. So glad you are enjoying the channel. 😃
55 and no regrets really but being here in the buckle of the Bible belt makes it challenging sometimes because EVERYone has kids in these small towns around here so I feel like a freak sometimes but deep down I really never had that deep desire like my mom did plus I have A.D.D./Major depression so I just don't think I could handle it. I loved my young adult years....I was so free to travel around with a band and go anywhere anytime and I did just that! It was fun. Plus I value my sleep and don't think I could work and raise children plus handle a husband. I've been a public school music teach off and on for 30 years and have seen single moms with problems like mine or worse, struggling and their kids suffering with problems as a result and I'm so glad I bypassed all that. As a teacher I have experienced the effect of messed up kids due to parent's poor choices like using drugs during pregnancy, or alcohol, etc. No thanks!
i totaly agree with every thingle word that you said
I'm 57yrs old and never wanted kids from since I was a teenager. Still no regrets, just dont like kids.
YES! Some of us will never change our minds no matter what people say.
Both my wife and I think kids are wonderful, but we never wanted to have any. We do appreciate their precious moments of exploring their surroundings with good intentions, grand innocents, curiosities abounding, and that cute child like naïvetés which delivers a good warm hearted moment like nothing else. But with kids you can count those moments with one hand, Both my wife and I prefer watching those kid moments on TV family shows so we can shut off when we've had enough. Then it's off to Monte Carlo to enjoy our life's success that was not stymied by having any of those disgusting self defecating spoiled things.
People nowadays are having fewer kids! Life is hard and unpredictable.
Very true.
There are better things to do, then have kids.
Yeah like help the kids in need
When I make dinner reservations I say I am allergic to kids - strangely I’ve had staff tell me it made their day and they couldn’t stop laughing.
This is great. I might try this lol!!!
I often go to a restaurant and ask for a quiet area, even at McdDonalds
LOL. People can be allergic to anything these days, so I guess that could work.
Having children seems overrated to me. Im glad I found this channel, You are well spoken and the formatting works well. 💀✌
I wonder, where do they find those amazing men that DON'T want children???
I am childfree since a very early age. I never felt pressured by my patents,they completely support me.
I've been in relationships a few times with very good men. But it had ALWAYS ended in me leaving them exactly because of their future goals. They all wanted to have kids in the future😭 so we had to say goodbye. One even called me back in one year with a question if i hadn't changed my mind(it makes me angry!)
I met a few men in my life, who said they did not want to have children(i was NOT in a relationship with them, just knew them), but one of them was a narcissist, another was a person with a very low social status, the third was just very bitter and angry at the world. All those are not an option for me. Or for anyone normal for a relationship at all 😅
So my question is real.
You are a breath of fresh air! Keep up the excellent videos. Best Wishes from England 🇬🇧 xx
Thank you so much! 🌷
NOPE // NADA zero regrets esp. in 'this' climate of greed and not taking care of
those already in need like the thousands of children in foster care and adoption
systems. Also so happy that I knew when a young teen and was lucky to never
have stress from family.
In this day n' age of our escalating issues from an ill planet due to humans and
corporations constant greedy decisions.
I think it's important to do what we can to try and preserve our precious planet. There should be enough resources to go around, but yes, human nature can be pretty greedy.
i have twins as 1st child 2 adorables girls (is it soo difficult but so grateful to have them )
Since i got them it s very happy and full life but with all the struggles To taise kid they are 15 months old
I started to build for them the best future I can ( trying to buy 2 condos for each girls for later in their 30s)
so much love and happy moment for now and hope it ll continue
I finally got a goal in my life provide protect and be the better version of me for my kids
I m 35 and kinda old but I ll endure it
no more social meeting and event but I m okay with that since all my friend got multiple kids
No. Had an abusive husband very early in life, and disgustingly took life away from me👶. Taught me a valuable lesson. What I see what’s plays out in my environment also, so my conclusion is someone above was watching over me.
These videos are great! You need to show them in all US high schools, especially in religious schools.
Kids should be made aware that they have a choice. Feel free to share my videos if you think people would find them helpful.
@@WifeWithoutKids
I will try my best.
When there’s over 8 billion people in the world 🌎 and many parents are NOT up for the challenges of parenting -let alone the cost- childless people should be praised. The planet doesn’t have room anyway.
That’s not true at all the birth rate is getting dangerously low in many places. I personally don’t care if people have kids but overpopulation is a myth.
well western people don't have kids but poor countries have kids more than 5 haha wonder the future who will invade ur country becareful maam!
Is it? Is overpopulation a myth to all the sentient beings that die or a left as refugees after we tear down their homes, clear the land and build houses on it? Are people all that matter to you? What about the creatures that have been wiped off the face of the planet due to habitat destruction? Overpopulation is not a myth and there is no scenario where billions more humans is a good thing on a planet of finite resources and with so much unique wildlife that also have a right to life.
Some don't have children so as not to pass on a serious genetic condition.
And the parents who have kids that won’t help them when they’re old. My friend has 5 and 1 helps her. The first one. She regrets having them at 73- except the one who helps her.
Don’t regret it. Oftentimes they move to some other area, country or state entirely, or judge you, or blame you for your divorce from the dad, or are just plain a-holes that you can’t believe you’re related to. Or their spouse is weird and influences them not in a good way. So many negatives. Abandonment. I’ve heard and experienced some of this. No matter how much you gave of yourself it goes wrong. Enjoy the peace of mind without them.
Approaching 50 and still no regrets.
Keep telling yourself that lol. You don’t know love until you feel the love you get for your kids it’s the ultimate purpose.
@@richie9878keep telling yourself that. Kids aren't for everyone and if I ever had kids they would end up in the hands of dcf or the police. You don't need kids for love you need to love yourself
@@The_unknown269 selfishness leads to loneliness
@@richie9878 people have kids for their own selfish reasons
@@The_unknown269 sure but quickly find out actually raising them is one of the most selfless things anyone can do with their lives. And when they are old and have many kids and grandkids that love them it’s a sense of fulfillment that is hard to match
Over 50 AND childfree? Now that's the type of woman I would like in a life partner, only because they are confident in who they are, they know what they want (and what they don't want), and they play no head games (unless it's "Head Games" by Foreigner).
As for regrets on being childfree by choice, I have none because you can never miss what you never had.
Exactly.
Being childfree at 71, 1 thing I wish I had known sooner & now advise any young woman who's positive she won't be having kids: don't marry, move in with, heck if possible don't even fall in love with an alpha/strong-willed/bossy partner. Because espec. for old females who are living with an old alpha, your only advocate (& unfortunately sometimes protection from the partner) will be an alpha/bossy son or son-in-law. Because if your old alpha partner is male & becoming even more stubborn & unreasonable, the only person there's a chance of him listening to is your alpha son or son-in-law. (I know of one case of an alpha daughter helping her elderly mom but it's rare; most old alpha males will only listen to someone with that all-important 3rd leg.) So it's sad and shouldn't be the case, but take it from me: it is most of the time. You have been warned.
oh yes, avoid alpha narc males
Bossy is never good!
Bossy and so called Alphas are attactive at younger age but as they get older they act so unreasonable.
People call us selfish because we're not in dismay like them. Like the old saying goes "Misery loves company" .
This channel is AWESOME!
Glad you think so!
I'm 52 and look 20 years younger . No stress related of taking care of a child, never regret not even a fraction. Noooo wayyyyyyyyy!!
Love it! 🙌😀
Being a twin is amazing!! 🎉❤
If someone truely loves children, then they can do a lot of community service by raising funds for orphan kids, children with disabilities, or children coming from abusive households.
Someone necessarily doesn't have to be a biological parent in order to prove their love for children.
I don't even want to adopt lol!
I can do the said first thing in order to prove my love for them.
I wanted to have children, but health problems and failed traumatising IVF made me opt for “it is time to stop with this stress and finally live my life childfree”. Perhaps I could have gotten a baby with my next IVF tentative, but I am too exhausted to continue. Anyway, I do not have the urge to have kids anymore, all I have been through killed all the sparkle I had inside.
I am thinking about the same thing after trying so hard for so long.
I'm a man who felt the same way, I was not into having kids until my friend had a daughter and I helped raise her. Boy was I ever wrong!!! That baby made me laugh every day, I bonded with her and never loved anyone more. Take it from a former kid hater, you don't know the love you are missing out on
Raising kids just isn't for everyone. I'm glad your experience was a positive one.
Female and I dont want kids, Im 32 and had a ligation this year.
I'm 64, never married no children. It's weird I never really wanted kids myself, but now at this age I think it would have been nice to have grandchildren. Of course you can't skip that step in the middle.
My neighbors spent 15 years together, building a company and making a lot of money never wanting kids. When they decided let's have kids she couldn't get pregnant. He left her with a 25 y old young model. She was jobless and lost.. After 2 y she finds a man that makes her go crazy about family, I don't know how but things like this always happen. You spend a decade with wrong people and wrong beliefs and suddenly you find yourself with 3 kids a big house and a lot of dreams. Life is all about Good and Bad timing. Chill out
Hi Hannah! Have you or Michael talked in a video about permanent birth control options? This is something I'm looking into as a male in my 20s and would love your perspective!
We haven't....I've sort of stayed away from the birth control topic in general.
Thank you for this video. I’m aware & at timers know I’m not relatable with many of my family members, I hope one day ‘a’ family member may ask me “what was your life like w/out kids?” Interesting & affordable.
That will be a great answer.
I have never wanted or having the urge to have children. My mother is a alcoholic, and so was my father. Both me and my sister struggle with anxiety dissorder. She just had a child, and is now having a total mental breakdown. Sleeps 2 hours a day. My advice to people out there who do want children is that you need a SOLID support system around you. You AND your spouce need to be of good mental and physical health. You don`t need to be perfect, some minor issues is ok. But this is going to be F¤cking hard. We are talking about zero sleep for years on end, and maby having a child with issues. If you are not mentaly, economicaly, physicaly prepared for this then most likely having a child is not for you. Also be aware the fact that the divorce rate is 53%. You are MOST likely over the time of 10 years going to be divorced.
If you spouce or partner is a narcissist/addict/asshole etc then PLEASE DON`T MAKE THEM A CHILD AND FIND A HEALTHY PARTNER TO DO IT, OR DON`T!. if you don`t know what a narcissist is or know about addiction then educate yourself on it.
You are not entitelded to be a parent even if the world tells you this " story". Have respect for the child and it`s rights.
Damn ..this is the saddest video and comments I've seen all day and I just saw one about a bunch of kids killed in Gaza.
By the way some here probably love that sort of thing.
57 no regrets.
Hello i recently found your channel,i am from asia and not having children is very looked down on here saying"who will take care lol" we will be so poor when old( I am 37 already haha idk why they still bother).
I wanted to ask how to save for the old age?as we know that a lot of time we get sick and hospitals takes a lot of money,my country is not that safe so I do not want to put all money in house.if you could just give over view of how to plan for it,like the money saving.I would be really grateful.
We have chosen to invest our money in multiple areas just to have a more diverse portfolio. Real estate, retirement savings, tax free savings account, work match programs, stocks, etc…. Each country has their own unique terms for these options so you’d just have to look into what your country offers. It can get complicated pretty quickly as there’s so much information to wade through, but good luck!
@@WifeWithoutKids thank you,your comment gives me some idea to where to start from.
You're insanely beautiful 🌞🧚🏻♀️
Ps I'm Bulgarian and don't want kids like ever, but never met another Bulgarian that didn't want kids
Hopefully one day you will met another childfree Bulgarian! In the meantime you have lots of support here. 🙌
Zdraveite Avvva. my parents are Bulgarian. Was born & raised in US. And I am child free too.
I had a Girl she is 8 … I was so afraid to have a kid … but I was in love … and I need it a reason to live since life can be lonely… Being a dad is the best feeling ever … yes I was afraid but with faith and praying and hard work you can become a parent … and most important Love in Christ… I can say I am part of being a parent and I have planted my share in this life … I admire those that don’t want kids …I thought like that once but I put all confort things a parent free life has to offer … To do God’s will …
Why I am writing this … to those that plan to have kids … but don’t want no kids now …
I understand how you feel … But being a parent has gave me a reason to live has made me stronger and a better person … I know there is a lot responsibilities but is worth it … to have a reason to live …
You should get less Social Security when you retire. The system needs future workers period.
Future workers who will more than likely have their jobs automated. The future looks bleak.
I regret it.
Would you rather regret not having them or
Have then and hate them an possible lead to abuse or just dumped into foster care
So what would you say to a guy who just doesn’t care of either eventuality? I sort of learned what It takes to be a great parent, but mainly cause I assumed I’d end up dating someone who wanted them, since that’s the majority. So wouldn’t you know, fate decides to give me the minority and so I’ve been dating a girl for a year that ended up being completely child free. I sort of brought up not minding kids early on in the relationship before i knew about that, but again it was cause I wanted to attract her, not really because I’m crazy about them. But now because of that, it’s really hard to convince her that I’d be happy being child free with her, because of the few things I said early on. Part of me thinks this is a new decision she’s made somewhat recently because she never once rebutted my talks about it during the first few months. How could I talk to her about this? Like if she changed her mind, I wouldn’t mind. If she changed her mind, but was infertile, I wouldn’t mind. If she stayed on this path, I wouldn’t mind. It’s hard to give her a hard “no” to wanting kids, cause I’ve never really thought of that as my choice as a man I guess. I’m only 23, she’s 25 and I never thought about this that deeply before so I’m struggling on how to convey my feelings :S This was half an actual question, and half just me trying to put my thoughts of this into words, so no prob if no reply 😅
I think just being honest about how you feel right now is a good place to be. Sometimes things change and sometimes they don't, but time is usually a good indicator of how things will turn out. If you both know where the other stands it's a great starting point.
There’s no such word ‘if’
🍎
📢📢📢 Hannah I soooo wish you 'would' set up a CDN based dating
service for only those 'proven' to be without and zero desire to have
kids. Especially here in BC please, haha.
HA. Apparently there's a need!
What's with older, single people and saying they have to live on their own? Just find some fellow roommates your own age. *shrug* That's what my ex-boyfriend's mom did a few years ago in her early-70s when she was separated from her husband.
That is definitely an option. My husband’s aunts are both single and they’ve lived together for years. They love it and get along exceptionally well.
I love my identical twin dearly but I do not like being an identical twin
I noticed my friends without children are the eternal Peter Pan and the women are the Wendys. I love them but they a limited understanding of their friends with children and grandchildren. Most of their conversations have to do with depression. They have a hard time accepting turning old.