This is draining, it's constantly being on guard. You just want to be at peace and relax but their only goal in life is to take that away from you, so they wait till they catch you in a bad day to have you react and yell how fed up of them you are! 😤
Keep your distance. Physically and emotionally. I've had narcs in my life and after going no contact with them for years I got my peace back. There is a new narc in my life and I'm going to do the same thing again. Don't let them into your mental space.
The negativity from the narc is just draining .Yet they project onto you that you are the negative one .Listen closely to their conversation ,they never compliment or thank you.
I agree 100 percent. I no longer have trouble protecting myself. I used to absolutely twist myself into a pretzel for others. It’s possible to change but it takes courage, practice and being ok with not doing it perfectly every time. Adopt a growth mindset about it and anybody can achieve mastery.
I had friends who is always bossing me around making me do things that they wanted to do. So I turn it around and became a friend that is constantly asking for favors. I'll ask to borrow money, or to give me a ride somewhere in their car. To babysit my cat and even to pick something up for me on their way home. They got so annoyed with me that now they avoid me as much as possible. Without even realizing that they has given me peace and I have been able to do so many things that I wanted to do an accomplish so many goals without being interrupted by them. My tip is if they bug you then you annoy them and eventually they will go away and you'll enjoy your life with peace and quiet 😜👍
@@Fenrispro When it comes to family you tell them the truth. You tell them straight up that they are a nuisance to you. Then you let them choose if they want to cut you off or start showing you some respect and behave 🤗
@@AnitaBonita46If you tell them truth then they will be kind and respectful. There will be no toxic people in this world. Their problem is that they never accept the truth. They never change.
Stumbling upon Channels like these is one of the best things to ever happen to me. They are really helpful in helping me navigate and eventually, getting myself out of sooo many toxic dysfunctional relationships that I had unintentionally put myself in.
It’s so hard to detach when the toxic people are my parents. They have total control now and I am trying to get out soon but so tough. They want me in their life but I am ready to have other meaningful people instead of just family.
I'm your cheer section! Nothing makes me happier than someone stumbling onto a channel that helps lift them and advise them in this area, especially younger people. So, YAY!! 2 U.
@unitinharmony7546 this really gets much worse of its parents. You've normalized being abused and thts the intent. You live for their needs. The kids that went thru this are now easy targets as adults, then you have to repayment yourself. They don't see your value beyond how it helps/serves them. Once they're dead they don't care wht happens to you after that. Take care of you regardless of their anger and they'll trip themselves.
It's 1.20am in the UK and I so needed this! Got my 32 year old son living with me. In 2014 he was diagnosed with Aspergers. In July 2021 he came back to live with me. He hasn't spoken to his mother, my ex, since 2012. Earlier this year he was diagnosed with ADHD. But through this year he has become more narcissistic in his behaviour toward me. Thank you Stephanie for this. Helped me get a positive perspective tonight.
I tend to end up as a "trashcan" for toxic people... It's horrible, and i just fawn as a trauma response! But im going to take responsebility now! I have grown stronger and now i have the energy end spupportsystem i need to take this battle. Thank you for making theese videos ❤
I've been listening to you for years and all of your videos are spot on. It helped me thru and to overcome a difficult divorce a year and a half ago. Keep these messages coming Stephanie.. Thank you..
Work slowly towards getting away from them. Build your escape route daily and go when the time is right for you to free yourself. Stay positive never give up❤
I have the tribulation of living with these types of people. Sometimes you just need to ignore their comments, try your best to minimize your interaction with them, and have your own space. Also, prayer if you are a person of faith.
There should be no excuses for staying in a relationship with someone that puts you through more stress and pain over love and joy. 💙TH-camr That Helps People Overcome Toxic Relationships
Problem she dont want to leave me alone,i want break up but she dont want..its suffering and so toxic.where living in together i told her to go back to their home but she want to stay..i hate the fact i cant have my freedom😭
Great video Stephanie, this is the reason why I haven’t gotten divorced yet, my wife is needy and toxic and all her problems she blames on me instead of owning her lack of discipline and poor lifestyle choices. This video is what I might need to finally have the courage to go through this divorce because this relationship has given nothing but heartaches and disappointments for 12 years. I have to be courageous and fearless and know that everything is going to be ok and it’s ok to dive into the unknown and a new life.
You are a life savior, Stephanie. Thank you so much for everything you do. You have no idea how much your content is helpful to me. Thank you so much ❤
Looking back if I could have done something different with my toxic ex, it would have been to not engage in the crazy arguments, it just fed her and drained me. Remain silent or walk away is my aim if i ever encounter this again.
What narcisists are doing has nothing to do with me! - repeating This mantra is very helpful and it is true! Abusive behaviour and hurtful words tell on the abuser and not the abused! Thank you.
This is SO HELPFUL to me, thank you!!! I live with someone who has outbursts and blowups out of the blue on crazy, little things. It’s just nuts!! And living in this environment is so taxing and utterly exhausting! I want to run away from my home at times and not come back. I’m currently working hard to heal from a recent cancer dx and I’m realizing separating myself from this person/detaching from him at these times is crucial!!! Thank you for this great info!🤓👏🏻👏🏻 I especially appreciate the part about not taking their issues upon us. It’s their problem, not ours. Thank you for this❤❤❤❤
I have a toxic sister. She has badmouthed me in the past to other people. She is now homeless, has 4 dogs that she won't get rid of and expects my mom and I to be at her beck and call whenever she needs a favor. She is coming back in to town this week and I am dreading it. I know she is going to come around the house again. She has deserted all her friends and even family members. She's draining us physically, financially, and emotionally. Thank you for this video. My mom and I need to learn how to detach from her.
yes their alot toxic people on this earth and i run into alot of them like cass he a friend of my mom's and he nosey and be's toxic around me i just ingore him now and act like he not even around me
I try to view dealing with the difficult person as emotional weight lifting. The more I can keep my emotions in check dealing with them and also NOT ruminating on the interaction afterwards, the stronger I get. I will be honest though, it's a lot of work not smashing a glass bottle across their face.🤣🤣
Bravo!!! Love this. I just learned in February about narcissism… and finally getting “practiced” in dealing with them, as you poignantly stated. Thank you for all your truly helpful free content. Much respect and gratitude
I agree. It is hard though. Like being on a course in a systemically toxic environment where you’re deliberately; intentionally misunderstood, maligned and ostracised. Holding your head up Showing up Navigating that It’s hard Especially when there’s 17 months of a course left It’s that thing: not wanting to be sabotaged and derailed but questioning why you’re putting yourself through it day after day Never being invited to group anything Groups delight in having someone to exclude, throw off and generally hate on.
I have been through so many difficult relationships and situations after survivor several forms of abuse growing up. I have learned to do the work to produce a wisdom response in the place of a emotional reaction! This video is spot on and very helpful. Thank you for what you do.
This all makes sense but when it’s your mother it’s so hard. She is getting more evil every week towards me to the point I don’t even want to live anymore. I’m 43 and the thought of another decade of being made to feel so low is unbearable. I resent her so much, I have no respect for her and think she is a terrible mother but I have no choice, we are only a small family of 4 and both my parents are very unwell, the guilt won’t let me walk away. I feel so trapped
I had the same question for Stephanie : how not to take it personally, if you’re dealing with relatives? Because at work or with a spouse it’s easier, then with mother or brothers and sisters, especially if you live with them under the same roof. How you maintain boundaries with the toxic people if you live with them and have to take care of them? I guess my plan should be: 1) to get a better job; 2) move out of the house & 3) hire a nurse. Or share a burden with brothers, at least financial. Usually toxic parents end up in a nursing home, there they spill their toxicity on the staff. But staff can take it and they don’t even get paid that much. They smile at them, feed them, wash their butts. It’s easier to take care someone else’s parents that’s for sure. Because there are professional boundaries and no traumas from the past that weren’t healed.
I think you have not placed enough boundaries, doesn’t matter you are their son or daughter. They will try to make you feel guilty Always, if you drop into that they get their power on you back. Need to work on your self-esteem, doesn’t matter that it’s your parent.
All I can say is move far away It's what I did and there is light ahead. Really just cause their family your mental health is far more important. The best.
Thank you! You explain things so well! As soon as I hear it, I think, “Of course! This makes so much sense!” Thank you for continuing to love & share your wisdom!
Thank you Stephanie! Your videos are always informative, practical, and inspiring. I’m actually emotionally triggered with anxiety right now. I’m a light sleeper and living with my dysfunctional family. My parents are both toxic in their own ways and my brother is as well. It’s very difficult being around them it’s an emotional rollercoaster. A little joy but it never lasts with them because they not ready to get help and heal individually.
Could you please post a video how to deal with and help a toxic narcissistic attention-seeking manipulative coworker who is also suffering from mental illness (delusion mainly)?
As always, so helpful !!!! Exactly what I am dealing with. while co parenting or paralel parenting; liiterally within last week it was a roller coaster... playing nicr in the sand box one day, the nect day not, saying he will do something and than just not doing it with no explanation. This was soo helpful. Thank you Stephanie
Omg perfect timing...crazy story I have. I got to pick up at grocery and they repeatedly give me Brown rotten bananas. I have complained nicely. Still getting the gas lighting that there's nothing wrong with the bananas! The last two weeks every time I do a pickup something's missing in my order and when I complain they say it was in there LOL what to do with these kind of people I will watch this video 100 times LOL
I think they are deliberately upsetting you - some people take a malicious pleasure doing that. Change stores, or you need some way of regaining power so they back off & stop it.
Amazing video as always Stephanie!! I loved the tip about evaluating what we do after the interaction. And making sure we’re doing healthy things to sooth (outside of venting. Lol)!
I'm running out of skin to cut and I don't think I can live like this and I don't want to continue to live like this but I'm broke and unable to get my own place. My job and the rent doesn't match. The rent cost is getting higher and I couldn't chase after it anymore. Here I am hoping to get some tips on how to deal otherwise I might just not wake up anymore.
I have had to job share with a woman that works on the other side of the country. She has zero morals, no professionalism, manipulative, a liar and all around toxic. She calls out sick all the time and I am left to do her work. I know her issues are hers. I am in no way responsible for her toxic and erratic behavior. I rarely engage with her on our message board because of her behavior. It does make my job a little more difficult but I am a professional and just keep doing my work. I have respect for myself and have really stop letting her affect me in any way. It would be just a waste of time. I am a happy and content person that has wonderful friends, I don't make room for toxic people like her.
When i’m detached and someone creates drama to try get control over me, i make light fun of the situation. I might be like. Me: Can i ask you a question? Her: ok. Me: why are you so fit? It changes the mood in a positive direction. You don’t have to stay close to that person after but this lets them know they cant affect you and shows you care even when they’re throwing a tantrum. If its too rude or disrespectful… tell them to stfu and remove yourself from there.
A great video as always Stephanie and really really helpful as I have to engage sometimes with my narcissistic mother. I used to jump to her tune, mainly I now realise to avoid her narcissistic rage, but now I am in therapy and also watching your videos to educate myself I feel more empowered and can predict mostly her “drink of choice” and prep for it. But slowing down my reactions is something I still have to work on so that is my No.1 takeaway from your video today. Love them for validation, therapy and just a reassurance that it’s not me!❤🙏
Ignoring is a great method however I prefer the lashing out method as you can let your anger build up inside and then when it’s time you can just fill the air with hate and smash them to pieces , when they eventually heal you can repeat it all over again 😂 bless you all ❤
I'm not a fan of the whole creating a "bubble" since their behavior causes hostility in others and it's something that they don't mind because of the attention they garner as a result.
How to soothe yourself after interacting with someone who is nasty to you is really hard to figure out. I wish you could provide a few decompression strategies for us. Instead of venting what to do? Journal about it, go to the gym, pray, etc?
Thank you thank you thank you.... you have no idea how much I appreciate your videos. I feel heard, seen and understood. I was questioning my own reality and sanity, and down in the dumps... but after watching and learning and reflecting on my own relationships their role, my role, my wounds, their traits... I can see the dynamics..... You are giving us tools to use, that can empower us, so we don't feel as drained or blame ourselves when dealing with people like this.... I feel relieved to be honest.... Your channel is the right step in reclaiming my own sense of worth and my mental and emotional health. P.S Your programs I would love to do, however can you provide payment plan option eg 3- 6 months a direct debit/credit card payment to come out, rather than the whole amount at once. I have done this with other resources I have been interested in, it makes it more affordable and accessible. : You may reach more clients that way. :)
I have been detached for a long while now but then it was birthday on Monday and I found it really difficult being the first one without him. Then realised he hadn’t paid something that was overdue that he assured me he would and I reacted. I hate that I did and I wish I just ignored it but for some reason I didn’t.
I have a judge. Deliberately being toxic. I am being patient but it is taxing. She is new to this field of law and thinks I am being horrible (all because I am objecting to questions during cross examination) 😅
Well I have some very toxic people crossing my life every day, pretty much at work. Customers. They act like I have to deal with them and only with them all the time, draining my energy to the zero level. I feel so exhausted when I come home, every day. One man bringing candies all the time, not only to me, but he talks so "slimy", like a pedophile, and he is seeking attention from me all the time. I have quite a few of people like him at work. It is driving me nuts and I am angry at myself because cannot handle them.
It’s a killer and the barbed hook that catches you every time 😢 hurt people hurt . A damaged adult having a tantrum . Release remove yourself and live your life to the max . They hate to see you happy and being out of their control ❤️
Perfect timing! Thank you for this! At what point would you say it's best to cut ties and leave? Or is the point that it simply doesn't trigger you any longer? I am dealing with a challenging client and not in position where I can leave just yet.
Actually, since we are all the same, watch our for projections, observe what they say about other people. They can treat people nicely and be love dovey with everyone but when they are with you, if it's a co-worker, you will see, hear and receive different treatment. That difference should tell you a lot. Plus, since they cannot put up and hold their mask of stand-up citizen all the time you will see cracks in their performance with other people too. They WILL snap at them eventually. That's how you know they can't actually control the act and keep the garbage inside. It will spill out. Also, see how people avoid socializing with them. That's also one of the signs they are probably an angry, narcissistic, manipulative. Mybe they are just too egotistical or low on sympathy and empathy. Whatever they WILL ACT. They are actors. Remember that. They act out friendliness, sincerity, pretend they like you, whereas they are jealous of you and can't stand whatever you have (intelligence, beauty, kindness, "how come all that in one person"). They just can't help it. But you can stand up for yourself definitely. Standing up for yourself and calling out their incongruent words and behavior will definitely shut them down FOR A WHILE. As for me and my colleague, we do not communicate. Why? Because passive aggressiveness can't be unlearned. Also silence gives me a lot of freedom to learn new things, to be more introspective. Yes you are right. My responsibility for this situation is that I made it into an awkward uncomfortable silence. I am not proud of it. But I can only pray for the things to get "better". But this person will never change their toxic mannersims. This person told me right from the start that they are not what they seem a cute nice little librarian. My mistake I did not listen to that as a warning! So you see, some of those people just worn you Right from the start.
He said when we met I made him believe I'm something I'm not😰 he has now completely destroyed that precious memory!! When he can't handle a conversation he will bring up the past by saying I found you in a cat piss stained house!. And stuff like that... Then he wants me to move on and pretend nothing happened and where over that!! Well I can't for get and often think about that.,.. It's pushing me away for sure.... I'm becoming colder towards him... And I try to get some time out together to rekindle the spark and work on the relationship.... But he's not interested at all......... .. He said go out with your friends that's what there for!!! He said he's not interested in cafes restaurants or pubs! He don't like crowds.... It didn't seem to bother him when we met! when we had a spark.....
I know my husband has major narcissistic tendencies, but am I a narcissist too? Is it possible that we both are? I seem to be the empath, but I don't want to be in denial either. When my husband expresses how I effect him, it sounds exactly as I experience him. But I finally started standing up for myself 3 years ago, and we've been together more than a decade. I conformed to pretty much everything he wanted for 7 years. Now I feel like I'm lacking empathy, but I've also been stomped on (because of my choices) for so long that I've lost patience. I have 4 young children with him so I'm not in a position to jet out. I'm moving forward in learning how to change myself to become healthier.
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This is draining, it's constantly being on guard. You just want to be at peace and relax but their only goal in life is to take that away from you, so they wait till they catch you in a bad day to have you react and yell how fed up of them you are! 😤
Keep your distance. Physically and emotionally. I've had narcs in my life and after going no contact with them for years I got my peace back. There is a new narc in my life and I'm going to do the same thing again. Don't let them into your mental space.
@@goaldigger9815All of the DEMONS must stop they are evils
I get that. Sometimes it’s too much “work” to even be around a toxic environment. What works for me is to be in a creative orientation.
That is so true! I never realised this before. I am starting to though
M@@thegeniusjourney
The negativity from the narc is just draining .Yet they project onto you that you are the negative one .Listen closely to their conversation ,they never compliment or thank you.
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ......
☝️☝️☝️☝️what¶ats'app hjm..
So true. I kept thinking this to myself about my narc housemate. She never once uttered one word of genuine gratitude or kindness.
I agree 100 percent. I no longer have trouble protecting myself. I used to absolutely twist myself into a pretzel for others. It’s possible to change but it takes courage, practice and being ok with not doing it perfectly every time. Adopt a growth mindset about it and anybody can achieve mastery.
I had friends who is always bossing me around making me do things that they wanted to do. So I turn it around and became a friend that is constantly asking for favors. I'll ask to borrow money, or to give me a ride somewhere in their car. To babysit my cat and even to pick something up for me on their way home. They got so annoyed with me that now they avoid me as much as possible. Without even realizing that they has given me peace and I have been able to do so many things that I wanted to do an accomplish so many goals without being interrupted by them. My tip is if they bug you then you annoy them and eventually they will go away and you'll enjoy your life with peace and quiet 😜👍
😂❤
Friends u can walk away.. prob is if u got family around like thus
@@Fenrispro When it comes to family you tell them the truth. You tell them straight up that they are a nuisance to you. Then you let them choose if they want to cut you off or start showing you some respect and behave 🤗
@@AnitaBonita46If you tell them truth then they will be kind and respectful. There will be no toxic people in this world. Their problem is that they never accept the truth. They never change.
Your exactly right Stephanie. We cannot let anyone control our emotions. Good video. I need to slow down on my reactions 😑
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ....
☝️☝️☝️☝️what¶ats'app hjm
Stumbling upon Channels like these is one of the best things to ever happen to me. They are really helpful in helping me navigate and eventually, getting myself out of sooo many toxic dysfunctional relationships that I had unintentionally put myself in.
It’s so hard to detach when the toxic people are my parents. They have total control now and I am trying to get out soon but so tough. They want me in their life but I am ready to have other meaningful people instead of just family.
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ....
☝️☝️☝️☝️what¶ats'app hjm
I'm your cheer section! Nothing makes me happier than someone stumbling onto a channel that helps lift them and advise them in this area, especially younger people. So, YAY!! 2 U.
@unitinharmony7546 this really gets much worse of its parents. You've normalized being abused and thts the intent.
You live for their needs. The kids that went thru this are now easy targets as adults, then you have to repayment yourself. They don't see your value beyond how it helps/serves them. Once they're dead they don't care wht happens to you after that. Take care of you regardless of their anger and they'll trip themselves.
Once you pick up signs of a toxic person around you or in your life ignore, walk away do not allow power of you to them. Go away from them.
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ....
☝️☝️☝️☝️what¶ats'app hjm
It's 1.20am in the UK and I so needed this! Got my 32 year old son living with me. In 2014 he was diagnosed with Aspergers. In July 2021 he came back to live with me. He hasn't spoken to his mother, my ex, since 2012. Earlier this year he was diagnosed with ADHD. But through this year he has become more narcissistic in his behaviour toward me. Thank you Stephanie for this. Helped me get a positive perspective tonight.
I tend to end up as a "trashcan" for toxic people... It's horrible, and i just fawn as a trauma response! But im going to take responsebility now! I have grown stronger and now i have the energy end spupportsystem i need to take this battle.
Thank you for making theese videos ❤
That is the only way do it and stay strong God bless
I've been listening to you for years and all of your videos are spot on. It helped me thru and to overcome a difficult divorce a year and a half ago. Keep these messages coming Stephanie.. Thank you..
It’s amazing how many unaware toxic people there are out here! Some absolutely refuse to work on themselves.
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ.........
☝️☝️☝️☝️what¶ats'app hjm......
💯
So true
Toxic people are always around me and they are literally everywhere.
Work slowly towards getting away from them. Build your escape route daily and go when the time is right for you to free yourself. Stay positive never give up❤
I have the tribulation of living with these types of people. Sometimes you just need to ignore their comments, try your best to minimize your interaction with them, and have your own space. Also, prayer if you are a person of faith.
There should be no excuses for staying in a relationship with someone that puts you through more stress and pain over love and joy.
💙TH-camr That Helps People Overcome Toxic Relationships
Problem she dont want to leave me alone,i want break up but she dont want..its suffering and so toxic.where living in together i told her to go back to their home but she want to stay..i hate the fact i cant have my freedom😭
Great video Stephanie, this is the reason why I haven’t gotten divorced yet, my wife is needy and toxic and all her problems she blames on me instead of owning her lack of discipline and poor lifestyle choices. This video is what I might need to finally have the courage to go through this divorce because this relationship has given nothing but heartaches and disappointments for 12 years. I have to be courageous and fearless and know that everything is going to be ok and it’s ok to dive into the unknown and a new life.
You are a life savior, Stephanie. Thank you so much for everything you do. You have no idea how much your content is helpful to me. Thank you so much ❤
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ....
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Looking back if I could have done something different with my toxic ex, it would have been to not engage in the crazy arguments, it just fed her and drained me.
Remain silent or walk away is my aim if i ever encounter this again.
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ....
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Reversed ✌️
“This is a trigger, this is a trigger, this is a trigger” my mantra
What narcisists are doing has nothing to do with me! - repeating This mantra is very helpful and it is true! Abusive behaviour and hurtful words tell on the abuser and not the abused! Thank you.
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ....
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This is SO HELPFUL to me, thank you!!! I live with someone who has outbursts and blowups out of the blue on crazy, little things. It’s just nuts!! And living in this environment is so taxing and utterly exhausting! I want to run away from my home at times and not come back. I’m currently working hard to heal from a recent cancer dx and I’m realizing separating myself from this person/detaching from him at these times is crucial!!! Thank you for this great info!🤓👏🏻👏🏻 I especially appreciate the part about not taking their issues upon us. It’s their problem, not ours. Thank you for this❤❤❤❤
I have a toxic sister. She has badmouthed me in the past to other people. She is now homeless, has 4 dogs that she won't get rid of and expects my mom and I to be at her beck and call whenever she needs a favor. She is coming back in to town this week and I am dreading it. I know she is going to come around the house again. She has deserted all her friends and even family members. She's draining us physically, financially, and emotionally. Thank you for this video. My mom and I need to learn how to detach from her.
yes their alot toxic people on this earth and i run into alot of them like cass he a friend of my mom's and he nosey and be's toxic around me i just ingore him now and act like he not even around me
Her video's seriously changed my life, and taught me so many things.
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ.........
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I try to view dealing with the difficult person as emotional weight lifting.
The more I can keep my emotions in check dealing with them and also NOT ruminating on the interaction afterwards, the stronger I get.
I will be honest though, it's a lot of work not smashing a glass bottle across their face.🤣🤣
I love this
God bless you Stephanie for putting positive awareness out into the world! 🙏
Bravo!!! Love this.
I just learned in February about narcissism… and finally getting “practiced” in dealing with them, as you poignantly stated. Thank you for all your truly helpful free content. Much respect and gratitude
I agree.
It is hard though.
Like being on a course in a systemically toxic environment where you’re deliberately; intentionally misunderstood,
maligned and ostracised.
Holding your head up
Showing up
Navigating that
It’s hard
Especially when there’s 17 months of a course left
It’s that thing: not wanting to be sabotaged and derailed but questioning why you’re putting yourself through it day after day
Never being invited to group anything
Groups delight in having someone to exclude, throw off and generally hate on.
With the holidays coming and being expected to tolerate that person detachment and a pause is wonderful. I took my power back.
I have been through so many difficult relationships and situations after survivor several forms of abuse growing up. I have learned to do the work to produce a wisdom response in the place of a emotional reaction! This video is spot on and very helpful. Thank you for what you do.
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ..........
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I've had one bad relationship after another. Wish you the best.
Its crap for me. Because when I was 17 I was assaulted and I still feel the pain from all them years ago
This all makes sense but when it’s your mother it’s so hard. She is getting more evil every week towards me to the point I don’t even want to live anymore. I’m 43 and the thought of another decade of being made to feel so low is unbearable. I resent her so much, I have no respect for her and think she is a terrible mother but I have no choice, we are only a small family of 4 and both my parents are very unwell, the guilt won’t let me walk away. I feel so trapped
I had the same question for Stephanie : how not to take it personally, if you’re dealing with relatives? Because at work or with a spouse it’s easier, then with mother or brothers and sisters, especially if you live with them under the same roof. How you maintain boundaries with the toxic people if you live with them and have to take care of them? I guess my plan should be: 1) to get a better job; 2) move out of the house & 3) hire a nurse. Or share a burden with brothers, at least financial. Usually toxic parents end up in a nursing home, there they spill their toxicity on the staff. But staff can take it and they don’t even get paid that much. They smile at them, feed them, wash their butts. It’s easier to take care someone else’s parents that’s for sure. Because there are professional boundaries and no traumas from the past that weren’t healed.
I think you have not placed enough boundaries, doesn’t matter you are their son or daughter. They will try to make you feel guilty Always, if you drop into that they get their power on you back. Need to work on your self-esteem, doesn’t matter that it’s your parent.
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ..........
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All I can say is move far away
It's what I did and there is light ahead. Really just cause their family your mental health is far more important. The best.
Thank you! So very helpful. When all else fails, give yourself permission to discontinue any interactions. 🙏❤️
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ....
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Thank you! You explain things so well! As soon as I hear it, I think, “Of course! This makes so much sense!”
Thank you for continuing to love & share your wisdom!
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ..........
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Thank you Stephanie! Your videos are always informative, practical, and inspiring. I’m actually emotionally triggered with anxiety right now. I’m a light sleeper and living with my dysfunctional family. My parents are both toxic in their own ways and my brother is as well. It’s very difficult being around them it’s an emotional rollercoaster. A little joy but it never lasts with them because they not ready to get help and heal individually.
I always trust what Stephanie will say will make perfect sense.
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ....
Could you please post a video how to deal with and help a toxic narcissistic attention-seeking manipulative coworker who is also suffering from mental illness (delusion mainly)?
Yea living with this walking on egg shell and tension is what gives us hypertension ( high blood pressure)
What can I do when I start feeling anxiety around the toxic person when they are near me ?
As always, so helpful !!!! Exactly what I am dealing with. while co parenting or paralel parenting; liiterally within last week it was a roller coaster... playing nicr in the sand box one day, the nect day not, saying he will do something and than just not doing it with no explanation. This was soo helpful. Thank you Stephanie
Starting my day with this video. Thank you for taking the time to say what needed to be said. ❤ you
Praise God Stephanie you've got an answer
- Self-control and don't get frustrated
So self developin' and healin'. Interesting vid. Love it, thank you
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ....
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I like how calm she is in all her videos, she seems soo chillll lol
THANK YOU a million times over!!! Your message gives me hope that I can deal with THAT person in my life.
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ....
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I like when things are slowing down and giving me the time to heal up. ❤
I have had people who used to follow me around. And I am sure there have also cost me to lose my jobs. Yep be carful and slow down and stop
Omg perfect timing...crazy story I have. I got to pick up at grocery and they repeatedly give me Brown rotten bananas. I have complained nicely. Still getting the gas lighting that there's nothing wrong with the bananas! The last two weeks every time I do a pickup something's missing in my order and when I complain they say it was in there LOL what to do with these kind of people I will watch this video 100 times LOL
I think they are deliberately upsetting you - some people take a malicious pleasure doing that. Change stores, or you need some way of regaining power so they back off & stop it.
Amazing video as always Stephanie!! I loved the tip about evaluating what we do after the interaction. And making sure we’re doing healthy things to sooth (outside of venting. Lol)!
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ..........
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I'm running out of skin to cut and I don't think I can live like this and I don't want to continue to live like this but I'm broke and unable to get my own place. My job and the rent doesn't match. The rent cost is getting higher and I couldn't chase after it anymore. Here I am hoping to get some tips on how to deal otherwise I might just not wake up anymore.
I am running over each of your videos and having them related
Thanks a lot ❤🙏 for sharing all these 🤗🤗
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Thank you for your videos, helps me more than you know
Thank you for this video, I wrote some notes down.
I feel a lot more prepared now to handle the difficult people in my workplace :D
I have had to job share with a woman that works on the other side of the country. She has zero morals, no professionalism, manipulative, a liar and all around toxic. She calls out sick all the time and I am left to do her work. I know her issues are hers. I am in no way responsible for her toxic and erratic behavior. I rarely engage with her on our message board because of her behavior. It does make my job a little more difficult but I am a professional and just keep doing my work. I have respect for myself and have really stop letting her affect me in any way. It would be just a waste of time. I am a happy and content person that has wonderful friends, I don't make room for toxic people like her.
Run is correct Nevermind that kind of behaviour🙏🌠
Could not need this video more today! Much appreciated.
I miss the good ol days. I just used to beat the beep out of them. In my environment, that doesn’t work today. So this video is very helpful.
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ....
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😂😂😂😂
When i’m detached and someone creates drama to try get control over me, i make light fun of the situation. I might be like. Me: Can i ask you a question? Her: ok. Me: why are you so fit? It changes the mood in a positive direction.
You don’t have to stay close to that person after but this lets them know they cant affect you and shows you care even when they’re throwing a tantrum.
If its too rude or disrespectful… tell them to stfu and remove yourself from there.
Thank you so much, I will watch this again and again as it really resonated with me and helped me.
A great video as always Stephanie and really really helpful as I have to engage sometimes with my narcissistic mother. I used to jump to her tune, mainly I now realise to avoid her narcissistic rage, but now I am in therapy and also watching your videos to educate myself I feel more empowered and can predict mostly her “drink of choice” and prep for it. But slowing down my reactions is something I still have to work on so that is my No.1 takeaway from your video today. Love them for validation, therapy and just a reassurance that it’s not me!❤🙏
This is an EXCELLENT video! I've watched it 5 times! 😊
Verrrrry good advice. I do these things subconsciously but this video shows me what exactly should be done
The format of this video is really helpful with the steps at the end. Thank you.
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ....
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Ignoring is a great method however I prefer the lashing out method as you can let your anger build up inside and then when it’s time you can just fill the air with hate and smash them to pieces , when they eventually heal you can repeat it all over again 😂 bless you all ❤
You are super helpful for me 🙏.
So a big Big thank you for all your help 🌟.
You are so smart, Stephanie... thank you! I am definitely rewatching and taking notes! I need these tips burned into my brain and muscle memory.
I'm not a fan of the whole creating a "bubble" since their behavior causes hostility in others and it's something that they don't mind because of the attention they garner as a result.
Thank You. This Advice Is Always Useful Around The Holidays
I needed this!! TY! Perfect timing!
Thank you sooo much! This is just ❤ what I needed!!!!
So glad!
I’m so thankful for your TH-cam channel, thank you for your time and energy 💜
She right. It gets a lot easier.
How to soothe yourself after interacting with someone who is nasty to you is really hard to figure out. I wish you could provide a few decompression strategies for us. Instead of venting what to do? Journal about it, go to the gym, pray, etc?
Thank you so much for this😅Your videos have changed my life.❤
THANK YOU for this video!!!! Just, Thank you. So insightful during my newly separation with my toxic spouse.
Thank you thank you thank you.... you have no idea how much I appreciate your videos. I feel heard, seen and understood. I was questioning my own reality and sanity, and down in the dumps... but after watching and learning and reflecting on my own relationships their role, my role, my wounds, their traits... I can see the dynamics..... You are giving us tools to use, that can empower us, so we don't feel as drained or blame ourselves when dealing with people like this.... I feel relieved to be honest.... Your channel is the right step in reclaiming my own sense of worth and my mental and emotional health. P.S Your programs I would love to do, however can you provide payment plan option eg 3- 6 months a direct debit/credit card payment to come out, rather than the whole amount at once. I have done this with other resources I have been interested in, it makes it more affordable and accessible. : You may reach more clients that way. :)
Thank you and I learned to be calm
Thanks so much. I really needed this advice!
I have been detached for a long while now but then it was birthday on Monday and I found it really difficult being the first one without him. Then realised he hadn’t paid something that was overdue that he assured me he would and I reacted. I hate that I did and I wish I just ignored it but for some reason I didn’t.
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ....
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I have a judge. Deliberately being toxic. I am being patient but it is taxing. She is new to this field of law and thinks I am being horrible (all because I am objecting to questions during cross examination) 😅
Thank so much for everything you do we love you 💗💗😘
Well I have some very toxic people crossing my life every day, pretty much at work. Customers. They act like I have to deal with them and only with them all the time, draining my energy to the zero level. I feel so exhausted when I come home, every day. One man bringing candies all the time, not only to me, but he talks so "slimy", like a pedophile, and he is seeking attention from me all the time. I have quite a few of people like him at work. It is driving me nuts and I am angry at myself because cannot handle them.
It's hard to set boundaries when they keep telling you that "they will be dying soon," That the doctor says that they are left with a few years.
It’s a killer and the barbed hook that catches you every time 😢 hurt people hurt . A damaged adult having a tantrum . Release remove yourself and live your life to the max . They hate to see you happy and being out of their control ❤️
THANK YOU!!! This helps so much!
Sounds exactly like my wife. Refreshing video.
I hope in the future you'll think about saying "toxic behavior" instead of toxic person.
Grateful for your advice
Great video thank you 🌈🌈God bless you 🌈🌈
I'm dealing with a sadistic psychopath... I couldn't focus on revising and studying for my important exam and I failed it because of their abuse 😢😢😢
As I go down the hallway to see 31 patients.
I’m drained, hell yea.
Perfect timing! Thank you for this!
At what point would you say it's best to cut ties and leave? Or is the point that it simply doesn't trigger you any longer? I am dealing with a challenging client and not in position where I can leave just yet.
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ....
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I love my mom, but GOD!!!
I needed this now, thank you! ❤
Sum it up. Put them on no trespass notice.
This is right on time!
Actually, since we are all the same, watch our for projections, observe what they say about other people. They can treat people nicely and be love dovey with everyone but when they are with you, if it's a co-worker, you will see, hear and receive different treatment. That difference should tell you a lot. Plus, since they cannot put up and hold their mask of stand-up citizen all the time you will see cracks in their performance with other people too. They WILL snap at them eventually. That's how you know they can't actually control the act and keep the garbage inside. It will spill out. Also, see how people avoid socializing with them. That's also one of the signs they are probably an angry, narcissistic, manipulative. Mybe they are just too egotistical or low on sympathy and empathy. Whatever they WILL ACT. They are actors. Remember that. They act out friendliness, sincerity, pretend they like you, whereas they are jealous of you and can't stand whatever you have (intelligence, beauty, kindness, "how come all that in one person"). They just can't help it. But you can stand up for yourself definitely. Standing up for yourself and calling out their incongruent words and behavior will definitely shut them down FOR A WHILE. As for me and my colleague, we do not communicate. Why? Because passive aggressiveness can't be unlearned. Also silence gives me a lot of freedom to learn new things, to be more introspective. Yes you are right. My responsibility for this situation is that I made it into an awkward uncomfortable silence. I am not proud of it. But I can only pray for the things to get "better". But this person will never change their toxic mannersims.
This person told me right from the start that they are not what they seem a cute nice little librarian. My mistake I did not listen to that as a warning! So you see, some of those people just worn you Right from the start.
OMG perfect timing! Thank you so much. I wonder why this is playing out so much right now?!
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ....
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He said when we met I made him believe I'm something I'm not😰 he has now completely destroyed that precious memory!! When he can't handle a conversation he will bring up the past by saying I found you in a cat piss stained house!. And stuff like that... Then he wants me to move on and pretend nothing happened and where over that!! Well I can't for get and often think about that.,.. It's pushing me away for sure.... I'm becoming colder towards him... And I try to get some time out together to rekindle the spark and work on the relationship.... But he's not interested at all......... .. He said go out with your friends that's what there for!!! He said he's not interested in cafes restaurants or pubs! He don't like crowds.... It didn't seem to bother him when we met! when we had a spark.....
I know my husband has major narcissistic tendencies, but am I a narcissist too? Is it possible that we both are? I seem to be the empath, but I don't want to be in denial either. When my husband expresses how I effect him, it sounds exactly as I experience him. But I finally started standing up for myself 3 years ago, and we've been together more than a decade. I conformed to pretty much everything he wanted for 7 years. Now I feel like I'm lacking empathy, but I've also been stomped on (because of my choices) for so long that I've lost patience. I have 4 young children with him so I'm not in a position to jet out. I'm moving forward in learning how to change myself to become healthier.
Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇs ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ ᴏʀ ᴍᴀʀʀɪᴀɢᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ! ʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ sᴏʟᴜᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ.........
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very well explained. thanks