Would You Love the Same Man On and Off the Pill? | Dr. Sarah Hill | EP 403
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 15 พ.ค. 2024
- Dr. Jordan B. Peterson sits down in-person with researcher, professor, and author, Dr. Sarah Hill. They break down sex-based differences in regret, competition, and academia; the balance between life exposure and safeguarding when raising a child; the practice of “mate-choice copying” among women; and why our hormones are a foundational part not just of our physical makeup, but also of who we are and who we have the potential to become.
Dr. Sarah E. Hill is a researcher and professor at TCU and author of “This is your brain on birth control: the surprising science of women, hormones, and the law of unintended consequences”. In addition to being at the forefront of research on women’s sexual psychology, Sarah is also a sought-after speaker, consultant, and media expert in the area of women’s hormones and sexual psychology.
This episode was filmed on November 14th, 2023
Dr. Peterson's extensive catalog is available now on DailyWire+: bit.ly/3KrWbS8
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- Chapters -
(0:00) Coming up
(0:42) Intro
(1:50) The pill and the hydrogen bomb…
(3:45) The definition of female
(4:46) Your gametes change everything about you
(6:59) Is a woman a single organism?
(8:26) Negative emotion sensitivity and puberty
(11:19) What the process of evolution via selection was designed for, and what it wasn’t
(14:06) Investment strategies and personality predictors, the dark Tetrad
(18:27) Likelihood for feeling regret
(21:00) Your level of investment echoes all the way up the chain
(24:11) Financial success and it’s bearing on attractiveness
(25:40) Why men are willing to elevate and honor other men
(29:22) Lekking: mating through association
(30:40) Mate choice copying: the perception of hidden amazing qualities
(32:43) Love investment by mothers: old versus young
(36:06) Cultural reasons for the rise of over-invested parents
(42:54) When love eradicates independence
(47:10) An exchange of vicious questions…
(54:02) Recognizing toxic femininity as a woman
(57:51) 1 in 5 women… the Law of Unintended Consequences
(1:01:55) Have the benefits outweighed the cost?
(1:04:45) The most lied to demographic
(1:05:25) Happiness, reward structure, and work-life balance
(1:08:36) 1 in 100: the intersection of disparate traits
(1:14:00) Synthetic hormones impact on the body, the integrated self
(1:17:15) Should we equate a “good” hormonal state with the male default?
(1:20:24) Are the Feminists to blame?
(1:23:43) The two states of ovulation on and off the pill
(1:26:58) Jaw size and attraction in regards to the menstrual cycle
(1:30:14) What women want
(1:31:38) We have no idea how much birth control has impacted politics, but it’s not zero
(1:34:52) Our hormones are supposed to shift
(1:37:43) Dominance and seduction
(1:39:39) Alcohol and violent crime
(1:41:15) The utility of cortisol, and what you trade it for
(1:47:57) Yes, birth control affects the development of your brain
(1:53:18) Male birth control
(1:55:03) Dr. Hill: A Message to My Daughter
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As a young woman, I really appreciate not being lied to. Thank you.
People need to watch this video… I had the amazing chance to sit in and listen to a lecture by a renowned endocrinologist, 25 years ago, when I was an undergraduate student.
I remember his words to this day: “I do not understand why fertility is being regarded as a disease that medication needs to be given for. Messing with hormones is never a good idea. Women are being given a medication for something that is natural in their bodies”.
@@RJ-ho8pn not sure what to make of your reply. The pill takes away the natural process of reproduction. Cavity and cancer are ABNORMALITIES, otherwise everyone would be getting them no matter what. Anyway, he was just a Nobel prize winner… what does he know, right?
It might be true for a high amount of people. Not true for me at all but doesn't mean they are lying. Psychology is all about theories. They are just discussing what they believe is true
Both cavities and cancer are by definition disease processes. Reproduction is not.
As a retired aerospace engineer, this I know: that everything is data and that data is everything, including what @student8885 characterizes as being lied to.
IOW, it helps to not take -- the good &/or bad stuff of life -- personally. Otherwise, everything then becomes as being about you, when in reality it isn't, if truth be told.
As a mob hitman said, It ain't personal; it's just business, your hormones notwithstanding. Which is how AI also looks at human life; it really doesn't care.
But I digress as is my wont.
I haven’t seen Jordan interrupt his guest this much in a long time 😅 He’s so excited by this conversation he cannot help himself. It was a great talk & I have immense respect for JP 👏
😂😂 sometimes i think the difference between interrupting and interjecting is whether or not youre actually enjoying the discussion. 😂😂
at first I was a little annoyed but then I realized Jordan Peterson can interrupt with genius any time he likes👍
Yeah I noticed this too, was actually a bit annoying, and he asked several in depth questions in the same very, very long sentence so we missed a lot of answers from Dr Hill. Might be interested, but god man, let your guest talk too!!
Good job seeing the upside - I truly am not sure how she felt about it though. He needs to let people finish their words.
I love JP but this is so annoying
I experienced this first hand. After we had twins and my wife went back on the pill, she was EXTREMELY temperamental, and even threatened to divorce me over a couple random things that triggered her. I urged her to stop taking the pill after about a week of this, and she eventually listened, even though she thought her feelings were genuine. A couple days later, and she looked back and couldn't believe how crazy she had been acting.
Ye I think that was definitely a part of it for my ex wife. Thought I was trippin but I wasnt
Women are crazy, but under the pills they are crazier. I tell you man.
All these drugs from big pharma. Aka it's witchcraft. Its like it put then in a transe. No wonder it made them act like that I'm definitely getting off mines cause you can tell your emotions be off.
Did u end up getting fixed or her jw?
Kind of had the same experience (except my wife went right back on the pill but we’re getting ready to have another child so she’ll be getting off the pill shortly and we’ll see the effects).
When my wife was pregnant… and this was when COVID was revving up (so they didn’t let me go to some of the initial doctor’s appointments and such) and we went throw a derecho (which to overly simplify is hurricane winds but nowhere near the coast) and our power was out in the middle of an extremely hot summer for 7 days when she was 7 months pregnant… she was an absolute f’n’ all-star. She was positive the whole way through, no complaining. Even had the option to stay at other people’s houses in other nearby-ish places that had power back already and she chose to stay home with me and the dog.
Before that she kind of had OCD and a little negative at times. Since then (not saying child birth had nothing to do with it) has massive OCD, negative the majority of the time, pretty short fuse and so on and so forth.
Especially seeing all the research (and our first hand experience) it’d be no surprise if the pill didn’t have some to most of the blame for it.
This made me cry at the end. I can't believe how much information we aren't aware of when it comes to hormones and birth control. We think and were led to believe that birth control was the answer to all of our problems. Thank you for putting this information out there!
It was wickedness that they pushed it so hard, they really took advantage of alot of women
All you need is s working brain...
@penultimania4295 they pushed it to children, you can't merely blame the people tricked. The people trusted as experts said it was fine.
I'll give you a chuckle.
Just after 1:30:10 Jordan says the word "companionship", but the first time he said it I thought he'd said "penmanship".
I had to rewind it and check, because I'm quite sure women have never been attracted to me because of my gorgeous cursive.
It disgusts me that birth control is usually pushed on girls as young as 12 or 13. Luckily I never got on it during my teen years. And all of my female peers who were on hormonal bc complained of side effects such as weight gain and bad acne.
I did end up trying it at one point when I was about 22 years old for all of 10 days. Almost immediately I started to feel depressed and su1cidal and just very mentally unstable. It took several weeks after stopping the drugs to even feel like my normal self again. The doctors brushed it off like it was no big deal and nonchalantly suggested I try a different kind of bc. No regard for the fact that I have a history of serious mental illness & su1cidal thoughts and that messing with my hormones severely exasperated this to a point I was a danger to myself. They didn't even bat an eye, just suggested I experiment on myself like some lab rat.
Doctors also always tell women who are experiencing any irregularities with their cycles or having pms that birth control is the best solution. What a weird way to address hormonal imbalances. They never try to find the root cause, just want to prescribe this or that medication which typucally come with unwanted side effects.
And they still wonder why people these days are so distrusting of doctors
Like so many other girls, my friends and girls I knew in school were on the pill for “acne control”. Doctors sell it to us for that reason. My friends were afraid to get off of the pill because they were worried they would get a big acne breakout if they did.
My 40 year old cousin is still on it even though her husband had a vasectomy because she admits she’s dependent on it and is afraid of what might happen if she gets off. I’ve never been on because my mom refused and didn’t want anything messing with my hormones. I’m so grateful to her!
Hi, sorry if I'm coming out as intrusive but I was curious what alternative did you use for birth control?
@@abbyesteban1707 i am not a person you've asked but i can give you my answer - condoms. And safe days. And in anycase man shouldnt ejaculate inside woman's body. That worked for me for 15 years like charm so far. And because it is not 100% protection you also install another layer of protection - no sex with random men.
I did pill for a 2 years(from 18 to 20). I had no obvious bad effect. But most of my friends on pill suffered various problems.
I am not a doctor but i think that messing with something as important as healthy cycle seems like a bad idea. If it is not broken - it does not need a fix.
@@abbyesteban1707 Breastfeeding a baby is great as birth control for the first 6 months at least if you feed him regularly. When periods come back, not having sex between one week after periods start and 2 days after you are certain ovulation is passed makes sure nothing happens. This gives you 2 weeks of calm every month and practice to not take the other for granted. Of course, it's not for those who lack self-control.
@abbyesteban1707 I only used the pill for a couple of years after I got married, and it was terrible for me. My ovulation isn't regular (but we get pregnant very easily), so we stick to good ol' condoms. I understand it isn't as comfortable, but my physical and mental health are more important.
A motivating factor for my husband is that he is the only provider in our home. No condom=severe morning sick mom for 8 months and a new mouth to feed.
So, are you happy with your 10 kids?
Was it worth it?
Now this is what I call intellectual chemistry! It’s so much fun to see two well-informed individuals from different fields of study critically thinking their way through problems. It’s actually exciting to watch. A very important conversation.
What universities were "supposed" to be for...
I agree chemists are morons, we need the intellectual modifier 😂
100% agree!
Agreed! You gave me language for what I witnessed in this conversation: intellectual chemistry. Many commenters admonished interruption in the flow of conversation. I was not able to articulate, even to myself, why I experienced their interaction so differently. I found expression in your words “two well-informed Individuals from different fields of study, critically thinking their way through problems”.
@@Jo-Anne.Clarke thanks. In retrospect, I think I left a word out. “Critically thinking their way through problems *together”* is probably more appropriate. That’s why to us it didn’t seem like interruptions. It’s just part of how two minds think together.
I took birth control for 2 months when I was around 27 yrs old. My husband and I had known each other for almost 10 years at the time. On the second month we both looked at each other and said I need to get off of it. We both could tell it was changing me and neither of us could stand it. This experience made me start connecting the dots in our society.
Imagine being a man having to deal with your girlfriend on birth control and all the emotional dysregulation it causes but not being able to point it out.
Would be like if whatever the percentage is of women who are on birth control, that percentage of men were taking steroids and women were just expected to treat it as normal and not even bring it up
Also you needed to have kids
It messed up my thyroid.
No doctor will ever confirm, but that’s when problems started. I felt it
100% true!!
Wow, as the father of a young daughter this was eye opening. Sharing with my wife and telling her to share with other moms. Thank you for sharing this entire interview.
Mothers should ideally be homeschooling their children. It's not over or under investing either way necessarily. Depending on resources. But if you expect other adults (or God forbid other CHILDREN) to raise your children, that's a problem.
What in gods name does this have to do with ops comment. Get a life mate
@@ari3lz3pp sending a child to school is not expecting someone else to raise them. You send them to learn academic skills, you teach morals and values at home.
My condolences.
@@bn09185 The education system is completely inefficient at teaching most children anything.
I learned more in this episode than I have in years about this topic. As a woman I want more people to know everything discussed here. This is so important so we can all be educated.
If you find this interesting, you may want to check out the Modern Wisdom podcast. That guy tends to interview a lot of evolutionary psych people and tech people and the modern dating problem is a central issue there.
@@jackiekjono0
Same here. I've learned more that i didn't know and confirmed more of what i already knew just watching JP i can listen to him all day and never get tired of listening.
Her book is great, it even has a chart showing the specific contents in a bunch of the hormonal common birth control methods, I definitely recommend it. A quick read but I learned so much!
Same here. I put the link on my IG urging people to watch this.
I love these interviews. I'm a young mother raising 3 kids. My husband and I both have rather problematic mothers (mine is way worse). My mother was viciously intelligent, a Nuclear Physicist for the Naval Nuclear Power Corps, but she had severe mental health issues and has serious psychotic episodes. I want to be a great mother and I'm trying to work through everything I went through as a child. I've found most therapy unhelpful, focused on blame and emotions, but Dr. Peterson has a way of explaining and giving actionable steps. Listening to his discussions on motherhood has really helped in my healing.
Same here girl. I SO relate 💗
If you are looking for more sources and have little kids take a look at “NowThatWeAreAFamily”. Learned so much from them.
😢god bless you
SAME! I had a raging narcissist for a mother. She had me at 21!!! She's doing much better as a grandmother . I still hate her guts but little less after him explaining her behavior.
my generation would have loved to had known this sooner. I can’t tell you how many of my friends got divorced shortly after they started trying to have a baby and the girl stopped taking the pill. I always thought it was just the pressure of the family scared the girl but it was always the girl that wanted the kids in the first place. Mind blowing stuff.
If they wanted kids then they shouldn't be whores on WHOREMONES
I knew it always. It's primal. Hormons rule peoples emotions and lifes.
Anecdotally, as someone who did not notice any discomfort whilst on the pill, no symptoms or anything; when I got off them my period disappeared for 9 months... I couldn't believe how much clearer everything was, it was almost like my vision cleared or like I'd been seeing in black and white somehow. It lifted a kind of depressive fog I didn't know was there, and then finally, as I'd met my now-husband whilst off the pill--- got on the pill for 8 years-- and then when I was off of it, I realized that I could "smell him" again! I know it's a pheremone thing, but it's also a scent that had been taken away from me I'd forgotten was there. I'll never ever go back, and if there are any young men out there who are considering biting the bullet to be with a girl, if you can sacrifice your own sensitivity by wrapping up for her instead of chemically altering her brain; trust me when I say it's a game changer for her (and ultimate *your* lives).
Or don't date a woman on birth control? I wish I had met someone else. Now I'm stuck taking care of someone who only ever drains me 24/7 and it's exhausting but I can't leave we married and have 1 kid. Breaks my heart I wanted 4 but she is too mentally unstable
Thank you for sharing your story
@@LilJbm1same boat. We have 2 now but my wife is like an overgrown child with extreme lethargy.
@@LilJbm1Can’t your wife get off it and see what else you can do to improve personalities and relations?
@@Amazonian11Ouch! I may conclude the same if I met your wife, I don’t want to judge you as harshly as you judge her just based on this single thing you say but how do you even live in the same house with someone you speak so unkindly of let alone share utmost intimacy? Are you sure there’s no area you can improve on as well?
My wife was forced on birth control when she was super young. She went off birth control shortly after dating me and it was crazy to see the difference between her then and now. Less water retention, so she lots some weight and visually leaned up. She also had a lot of depression medicines that she was one too, so that definitely played a big role in her change as well. But her personality really seemed to explode in prevalence. Which was amazing!
I'm very happy for you, mate. Hope you and your lady have many years of love, comradery and passion ahead of you. May you guys always have the wind at your back.
isn't the opposite. don't those things have steroids so keep u leaner?
Birth control is poison
@@lionheart93No. They basically make you body think it's pregnant so you gain weight
The birth control is the reason why a lot of young women look like they've had at least 3 children when they have never even been pregnant. They're secondary s€xual characteristics are so overgrown while on these birth controls. That's why they struggle to lose weight on the most basic lean diet. And by the time they have children and reach the age of 35 or 40, they're even more overgrown and waddling like a senior citizen.
This needs to be told to women BEFORE they go on birth control. I already have to deal with several mental problems, going on birth control made them much worse as well as adding new problems. It was miserable.
Just don't do it if you already have issues and pay attention to what is going on with your mind and body.
A dermatologist recommended it for me as a cure for acne when I was a teenager. I decided against it and I’m so, so happy I did. All my friends have issues with fertility now, irregular periods and such. We ought to talk about it more!
Definitely! Women and girls are owed much more background info and warnings before pursuing the pill. Instead, doctors hand it out like candy.
I've heard this story so many times......It's fucking sad. We have all be duped.
been*
I'm so glad that this is now something that can spoken about with polite company. Thank God that people are willing to speak of the problems that the pill presents.
We sneer at society a century ago where Ulysses & Lady Chatterley's Lover were censored. Our era is immeasurably worse for censorship - because the Cathedral censors discussions that actually matter.
Pill ruined my fertility
And I am a pharmacist. Was taught it's 100% safe,
Polite phhhffff. I scoff at your polite compliant company. 😉
As I recall I heard some church ladies talking about this fact thirty years ago, and they were *very* polite society. The problem seems to have been in the "media society" or "academia", or "normie culture", but whatever you called them they would have been perfectly happy to be rude to approved targets.
I’m shocked that they didn’t even mention that the pill is a known (Class1?) carcinogen. Also didn’t mention how many female infertility problems are caused by its long term use. A very knowledgeable OB/Gyn once said clomid & progesterone are ALWAYS needed for females to get pregnant after long term BCP use. Also the hormones in the water supply are undeniable. Everything has its cost and risk/reward but the risks are silenced.
In-person dialogues are so much superior than online dialogues. Please keep this up.
The cortisol issue explains why so many young women talk about how much "trauma" they have from minor things. And it explains why so many keep making the same mistakes over and over again and not growing as a person. Which only makes the problem worse each time.
As a young woman of 20, this is why I'm grateful my mother discouraged my use of birth control, and why I get annoyed when middle aged and elderly adults tell me that I "have time, and chill out". Like, no, I dont, for children? Not really
Thank you so much for this conversation, it was VERY enlightening. It's insane to think about how acceptable it is to mess with our hormones without really knowing the consequences.
It's almost bizarre to be frank. It's such an obvious concept that trying to min/max hormonal flow in a person would take a personalized program with tracking and regular updates to have any success.
Sure you can get some efficiency through trial and error with preset drugs, but its pretty clear conceptually that isn't the best case.
All of that without asking what are we min/maxing to...
Whenever I learn about this kind of "discoveries" I think about the vacs we had to take because of covid.
I know girls who were on it since they hit puberty until their 20s. All of them are sterile now
Best talk on hormone and behavioral differences between the sexes. Thank you for normalizing women's behavior.
Jesus Christ this woman is smart you can tell she has jp respect and deference
@@metoceedeelee xD
Strange thought process. Especially on the internet.
She’s very smart and this is an incredibly interesting topic
What a interesting conversation 👍🏼
Let's not normalize hypergamy.
This must be without a shadow of a doubt, one of the most important conversations of the 21st century! I am certainly going to forward this to as many people I know!
she didn't even mention its a number one carcinogen! (right there with cigarettes)
My wife of 17 years left me after going on birth control. She became a different person shortly afterward, thought she wasn't happy with our life, tried antidepressants, and eventually just left. I will never understand how women just accept chemically altering themselves and not attributing their unhappiness to the foreign substances they had put into their bodies.
Now I'm left empty and alone. She's a completely different person, and I feel like the world isn't even the same place it was when she left in 2020.
Maybe she was told the pill was necessary, and her behavioral changes and emotions were just her fault. Get a vasectomy and get her back!
This was a stellar episode but it baffles me that there’s no discussion whatsoever (on Dr. Hill’s part) about the now alien concept of temporary abstinence? The idea that one cannot “get through college” without being on birth control is astounding. It was clear that Dr. Peterson wished to raise this idea at several points but that he held himself back, perhaps out of fear of offending his guest. Understandably, it would be near impossible to even discuss this concept without being subject to ridicule nowadays… but it is, and always will be, the most simple, risk-free solution.
I kept thinking the same thing. People just keep looking for the magic pill that will allow us to have all the fun with no consequences or side effects. I was also surprised Natural Family Planning - NFP - never came up, as if it doesn't exist! (As a 43-year-old mother of two, married for almost 20 years, believe me - NFP works.)
Yes, agreed.
amen.
What's strange to me is that when she described what hormonal birth control does, she said that it basically imitates the hormonal state a woman is in when her body is in a post-ovulation limbo waiting to determine whether she's pregnant.
That immediately raises the question, "If hormonal birth control badly imitates a natural, recurring hormonal state, why not use the natural hormonal state rather than artificially induce it using birth control?"
The answer to that would probably be something like, "Because that hormonal state lowers my libido." But that just raises another question -- namely, "If you know that the natural state that hormonal birth control imitates lowers your libido, why would you think that the bad imitation wouldn't?"
Funnily enough, it was when I was busy trying to get my degree for my future and avoiding expenditures to keep my debt as low as possibly while being constantly stresses that I found out that it's incredibly easy to not have sex. It has really made me jaded towards people who talk as though it is inevitable, as if people should be alcoholics or nymphos or drug addicts.
This interview is incredible. Please have her on again in the future.
This is easily one of the best interviews you've done. It has been highly enlightening.
I was on the pill for 10 years. I had long term relationships but I wanted to focus on my career and it was first recommended to me my gynecologist for acne control (at 18 years old). I stopped during COVID because my depression felt mostly physical and even though I was concerned about my acne returning, I couldn’t stand it anymore. I was a vegetarian since I was 15 years old. I feel I did severe damage to my body due to my personal choices. I have no proof but not doubt that the combination was disastrous. My life has dramatically changed. Thanks so much for this conversation. This channel Dr. Peterson has been not only a hope for a never ending pit, it has been life saving. Thank you.
One quote that kept coming to mind during this conversation was "There are no solutions. Only tradeoffs."
~ Thomas Sowell.
Also, he'd be a great guest if he's still willing!
Team fortress 2
This is probably the best, most useful conversation between a man and a woman I have ever heard.
Dr. Hill is a brilliant scientist and a truly gifted communicator. She puts very complex scientific knowledge into easier to understand terms. I’m completely enamored with her. I would love to take a class on the subjects she teaches. And she handled Jordan’s way of interviewing like a master.
I love you Jordan. I’ve listened to hundreds of your online videos, Read 12 Rules for life, saw you speak in person. You have definitely positively affected my life, but would you please,please,please, stop trampling over the ends of peoples thoughts/ sentences. I’ll bet you did that to her a hundred times in this interview . You deny the listener when doing this. You deny the speaker of completing their thought to your question. And you deny yourself something you might not know.
I make the exact same mistake all the time. I hate when I do it. I am working earnestly on my listening skills to correct this terrible flaw. I’m sure it’s an endless practice. The current state of humanity begs that we all practice being better listeners. Deeply hearing each other.
I am currently a carpenter and I want to become a Yoga Therapist. I was told that listening is the most valued skill of any type of therapist. I have a hunch it’s true.
I love and respect you Jordan, but please do better with this. It’s rood to your guests and listeners. I say this with all due respect.
Peace and Love, Paul
I'm glad she didn't let him cut her off though, she usually continued with what she was saying
He does it all the time in the bible series, guess he is getting old.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Jordan does NOT allow his guests to complete their thought.
Yeah, it helps to watch people's mouths. You can actually see the visual cues that reveal when they are starting to speak and when they are finished speaking.
Yes I totally agree- I wanted to listen to Dr.Hills train of thought and he kept cutting her off! Jordan Peterson is great but I felt defensive for Hills during this interview, thinking "let her talk!"
I was on the pill for 13 years not just for birth control, but my periods before going on it were a nightmare. Intense cramps, heavy bleeding and they lasted over a week. When I described the pain to my doctor, he said it was similar to the early stages of labor. The pill worked out well for me both physically and emotionally. The only reason I had to stop was because my blood pressure kept going up in the last couple of years.
Same here. All these videos are demonizing the pill even though a lot of women have 0 issues with them. I got off for about 8 months and noticed absolutely no difference except for horrible acne. Turns out my testosterone levels are too high naturally and the pill helps balance them out🤦🏻♀️🥲🤷🏻♀️
@@Esthie229I agree with both of you. I haven’t had an issue in 10 years with my birth control. I am still very attracted to my boyfriend, I still smell him, I still have regular emotions and clear thinking. No issues with anything other than small cysts that were there prior to birth control. Reading all these comments have me wondering when my time will come for birth control to completely ruin me, I suppose.
@@unbittentoenail I guess it makes sense that the people who do have issues with bc will watch videos about it and voice their opinion. People who don’t have any issues often won’t write comments
@@Esthie229 you’re spot on!
This video is so important. The fundamental differences between men, women, women on and off the pill AND what that does to male behavior/ interest.
All of this just hiding in plain sight.
Insane.
Now Jordan looks much better, healthier, more handsome. Nice to see it. I hope his health is going to improve even more.
Really happy that this is now being discussed. My body and brain never got on well with synthetic hormones and I started the pill at 16. Since having my daughter, doctors kept trying to get me to take the pill again and I have refused. It severely impacted my cognitive functioning, my sleep, my attention. For me, it wasn't worth it. It took me years to realise it was the pill making me feel bad.
We don't discuss enough the relentless pressure to go on birth control immediately postpartum. The last thing women need during the most hormonally chaotic period of our lives is to throw another synthetic hormone into the mix!
@@abigailsmith8690100% this!it is mandatory for your OBGYN to discuss birth control options at your 6 week checkup. I was shocked after having my baby. No discussion whatsoever about just letting my body do what it was meant to do naturally!
hubby got me off it, wont go back to it ever.
Yes! I have a 9 month old and doctors have pushed bc on me too. I will honestly never go back on it and have decided to use natural family planning techniques and a diaphragm instead. I realize the chance of accidentally getting pregnant is higher, however I also think it’s about knowing/learning your body (signs of ovulation). In which doctors never seem to teach people.
Fantastic conversation and such an eye opener. I was thinking of my wife whilst watching this and have so much more respect for what she must be emotionally going through constantly. I’ve sent her this link and would like her to watch this as I don’t think she is informed of the risks and effects of the pill to this degree, on her and our daughters. Thank you so much ❤
I love the smiles she gives him when he goes off on his trail of thought. Taking it all in, trying to synthesise their ideas on the fly.
I learned so much from this. As a grandmother, I feel this is useful in helping other female family members better navigate this subject. Thank you both.
How blessed your family is to have a granny who cares about their psychological needs❤
I would have learned even more if JP wouldn't interrupt his guest do many times aggressively before she even rolled out the deeper stuff. JP is a terrible host, dramatic, and is using too often over eloquently words for minimal basics. Thank you JP, today I've learned from you how I am currently and don't want to be in the future anymore.
I feel this is useful in helping other female family members better navigate this subject"_ - like, will they ever listen? I mean, those females actually within the "pill age"? Cuz I frankly doubt it.
I was prescribed birth control as a teenager. The nurse told me, “oh, you are going to love it. It will clear your skin, ease your period, so great to have.”
It took me quite a while to realize that my personality changes, depression and nausea were from birth control.
I think many, many girls are being told that birth control is a cost free fix. I had one doctor tell me, “there is no medical reason that any woman should have to have a period”.
If you need birth control, maybe it’s worth it’s risks and downsides. But let’s not treat it as the risk free choice.
Wow.. that is just wild that s doctor would make that statement about ANY medication. Just wild. Thanks for sharing.
I before birth control I would sometimes burst into tears randomly before my period.
After birth control this got much better and I am more emotionally stable.
I tend to think that maybe my hormones were imbalanced before I started the pill and after taking the pill I got better.
For others, maybe the hormones were fine in the first place but when the pill was introduced to the body it knocked everything out of balance.
@@PaperGrapeI disagree. Doctors are drug salesmen these days. Often the work for the institutions doing drug trials! Think Universities!
@@jessicafang3273 Indeed. Some people assume that if something works for them, it works for everyone.
@@skylinefever Yeah, the crazy thing I’ve heard about birth control pill stories is how little the doctors do to consult patients.
My doctor gave me a 15 minute lesson on what different birth control pills do and side affects of the pills and that only ended when I assured him I read up on the pills and the side affects before I asked him for the prescription. Then for my first prescription I was only given one month of pill for the first prescription to make sure I had no side effects.
A lot of doctors just don’t do that in the US I guess.
Just the way he opens this conversation is absolutely fascinating.
I think one of the best podcasts you've done. And I could see you were incredibly engaged the entire way through. Dr. Sarah Hill, you've got a new fan. Thanks guys!
I only started seeing the impact of birth control on me a year before I got off the pill. I was on the pill for 3 years and I had gained 10kg, had severe acne breakouts and just exhausted all the time. I even had a low libido. But now that I am off it for about 1 months, I am always ready for my husband and I to do the deed, I long for him constantly and he is super happy 😃. Even my moods have changed, I am happier and I feel like I am slowly losing weight.
Feels like a (free) college course! I follow each and every one of Jordan's interviews because of this. I am getting smarter by the week because of these. I so wish I had had this opportunity when I was a young man. Oh well, it is what it is. To all young men out there, my suggestion is to hop on Jordan's train and take a journey of learning. Godspeed.
I also recommend Andrew Huberman for free high quality university lectures (interviews, practical protocols)
I am in the same boat. Have you tried telling the truth or not lying yet? That's the Holy Grail right there.
So well said...men and women for that matter !❤
You should also check out Personality And It's Transformations 2017. Jordan Peterson's Psychology lecture series.
This is such a needed conversation and topic of study. It is scary to think about the effects it has on so many areas of society, but we can’t deny it!
Top 3 JP interviews for me. Sarah is a brilliant woman. And she has made me raise my concern for something I never questioned properly before. You can’t really overstate the gravity of what is being discussed here……
Thank you! Will be rewatching and doing a lot of reading as a result of this to make sure I can help my future children (possibly daughters) and the daughters of others. Make informed sensible choices.
❤ to all x
I could never put my finger on it, but in high school I would always get a feeling when a girl was on the pill. Not even girls I was into, just friends and classmates. It completely changed them.
When you do a quick google search about the short and long term effects or birth control on women, everything talks about the effectiveness of birth control! This was an infuriating realization! I had to DIG DEEP to find any good info on this topic, so THANK YOU VERY MUCH to people like you 2. Thank you for studying this and sharing it with the rest of us! You are the feminist we need. Also, Jordan, it's crazy that so many people paint you as a misogynist. If you actually listen, you very obviously care for both men and women. Thank you for all you do!
Google controls the info you see. Not an accident. :/
I always knew this. It's pure basic biology. Hormons run your emotional and sexual life.
I couldn't agree more... @JP I loved the attitude of learning displayed in this convo, though atimes I wished you allowed the guest Dr. Sarah dropped the words asper finished her thoughts, as I felt like a man in a competitive learning classroom; Thankfully I still got the 'aha' moments. Big thumbs up for discussing and sharing this talk.
As a young man, I heard & followed the message of abstinence; I'll be preaching abstinence my lifetime. Nature is Wisdom not foolish, we require time to unfold it's vastness.
Thank you Daily Wire.
This is SO important!! I was prescribed birth control right after I turned 15 years old because I had ovarian cysts. I wasn’t given any other option (and probably wouldn’t have taken it because I was so young and didn’t know any better & trusted my doctor) and I didn’t understand what I was signing up for - other than I wasn’t going to get a period anymore, such seemed like a win win!
Fast forward 11 years, I finally got off and I actually feel like myself! Being a woman is so beautiful and I hope this reaches many more women. I genuinely feel free!
This could be the begining of a change on this little issue. I've learned a lot, i admire your courage and thank you for sharing Dr. Hill.
Fascinating, enlightening...& heart-breaking. I was put on hormonal birth control for acne when I was 13... came off it in my late 30s ... I feel so betrayed & naive. So much about the trauma response portion really hit me hard...makes a lot of sense. And very sad too. But praying God miraculously heals & reverses any/all damage in my body & mind from the decades on the pill. Thank you so much for this powerful & important discussion!!
100% agree
Thank you for sharing your experience. This breaks my heart but I truly believe in the healing power of GOD. Christ be with you as you heal. This is such an eye opening conversation to have with my daughters and your experience helps not take the pill for acne as suggested. Love love this platform ❤️
@@carolinatovar1624Amen. Christ heals all.
Thanks for your comment, I wish you well on your journey of recovery. If you don't mind, I'd really hope to know what your experience was dealing with acne without hormonal BC. I have a friend I'd love to help get off BC, but is resistant because its the only thing that has helped with her acne. Seemingly doesn't consider deeper hormonal imbalances and factors that she could seek to improve instead. As someone invested deeply into a holistic health view, I'd really like to know more approachable action steps that could at least mitigate acne for women coming off BC, do you have any suggestions that could work?
@johnhauge5921 my acne came right back after coming off the pill but I found natural methods to get my natural hormones back in balance: a workout program called Metabolic Renewal that is designed to balance hormones with the added benefit of improving strength & fitness built upon the foundation of hormonal harmony. I also found a more natural supplement called Acne Clear + a high quality probiotic I take daily. Additionally, I do medical-grade red light therapy for my skin overall, with blue light being particularly effective for acne (there are in-home LED devices available, I use Platinum LED brand.) And hitting the IR sauna for 30-60 mins twice per week has been very beneficial as well. I hope your friend can find encouragement in any combination of these options that have helped me - I empathize greatly with the stress of adult acne.
Dr. Hill was my favorite guest on this podcast thus far, and one of my favorite guests on ANY podcast.
Awesome episode, will be recommending this to many.
Thanks Sarah for all the great work you do and the bravery talking about this openly! You are a true champion not only for women but for all of society!
This conversation is something I have been waiting on for awhile…some of my favorite academics/thinkers right here…THANK YOU!
I haven't gotten through this whole interview yet but it always touches deeply so far. My mom put me on BC when I was 12 or 13. Looking at it now I can't believe that people are ok with this. When I came off it the first time I left my ex, realizing that I always had that voice in the back of my mind telling me he wasn't right for me. I met my husband and we had our daughter and I tried to go back on it after being BC free for over 2 years. That was one of the most awful experiences of my life and I quickly got back off it. In hindsight I realize it was probably a huge driver for the anxiety and depression I struggled with as a teen and young adult. I'm so glad to be free from that prison. My goal in life is for my daughter to have a better experience than me in that regard. I obviously made my own choices, but I want to give her that chance to make those choices as a teen and young adult free from the haze of pharmaceuticals.
Thank you JP for doing what you do and always finding amazing and insightful people to speak with.
What a well spoken woman this is! It is interestingly kind of relaxing to watch JP being successfully contradicted for once 😅 And he takes it very well, as expected, because he is a real scientist himself.
Many thanks to both of you for letting me be part of that very enlightening conversation. Warm greetings from 🇨🇭
One of the best discussions Ive heard coming out of this channel, Peterson is on the ball but that is to be expected. Dr. Hill was one of the most eloquent speakers Ive heard take questions from him. Thanks for sharing your knowledge.
This woman is a gem. Saw her before on a podcast that focused more on the scientific mechanisms of her work which was great. Now i get to see her talk with a much more philosophical tilt due to peterson’s core interests as an interviewer.
I liked her a lot. Jordan’s guests have been hit or miss recently, but I could listen to these two conversing all day long.
I got off birth control at 26 after being on it for a very long time. I had various health issues that doctors prescribed it for. (It never helped those issues). There were a myriad of reasons for my divorce, but I do wonder if birth control had contributed to keeping me sedate in a terrible situation with a man who was very dysfunctional in his masculine roles. (That was not the reason I left. I didn’t even realize I was missing that until later).
When I got remarried, I wasn’t on birth control. Off of birth control, I chose a very masculine man with healthy function in all those areas. When I got back on birth control briefly a month into our marriage, I’ve never felt less connected to my husband. When I got off it, all of that attraction and connection came back. I’d never thought of the connection that way before, but wow. Insidious.
Absolutely disturbing
The pill is evil and anti human at every level
Clearly amongst my TOP-5 Best talks for 2023.
- Absolutely love Dr. Sarah Hill's clarity, in-depth explanation of the topic & enjoyed the super-kiddishly excited Jordan interrupting her like craZy.... many times, mid-sentence... 😀... made it real ! (Jordan challenged the judgmental me to keep dropping it !)
- The perspectives and questions posed by Jordan were pertinent = the perfect interviewer / discussion partner in this video.
- Honesty of the discussion was inspiring!
Good work guys, rare moment that I managed the whole talk with only one break.
Cheers!
The porn take was dangerous to say the least. Don't go giving ideas to men that porn doesn't cause any damage to your sexuality and overall sex drive; it can work as a complete replacement for actual intimacy, which can lead to a very serious depressive state in the long run. Everyone starts it super young, were talking pre-teens here, and it has the absolute potential of a perfect storm to wreck your whole emotional & sexual progress and life upside down.
You can literally make it your partner: You and your cold computer screen, watching another man having the time of his life while you sit at home and "fill your need" by "satisfying" yourself to said act. The reality of the situation is cold on an abyssal level. There's no way in all the nine hells that's good for you.
I fully agree. As far as I can tell, not only does porn cause men to be less interested in real women for a huge variety of reasons, not the lest of which is cheap and easy sexual gratification, it also causes a whole slew of mental and physical health problems.
YES!! I've seen the emotional issues that come from watching too much porn. My ex husband was obsessed and it got to a point that I was no longer good enough for him because I could not live up to the videos he was watching. His mental health also declined the longer it went on.
Spot on except for the idea that the guy on screen is having the time of his life. That simply doesn't represent the industry and average mindset of those who have made that their "career". Lila Rose recently interviewed a former "award winning" male porn star, so you should listen to him talk about the extreme nature and prevalence of depression and brokenness and hopelessness of porn actors and actresses, and how common suicide and suicidal ideation is. They're not enjoying themselves in the way you imagine, granted there is a certain base level of purely biological stimulation going on, obviously, but they're numb and empty and harbor great shame very often, and these encounters for them are so routine and anti-intimate, it's literally "just a job" they feel they can't escape from. There is rampant mental and emotional abuse and manipulation and degradation too, for both the men and women.
I don't know what happened to me but I used to watch porn all the time and even my partner would watch it with me. I got sick, and had to go on various medications. It's been roughly 2 years since I looked at porn but the addiction, and also any desire for sex just dissapeared. I always wondered if that has something to do with getting old.
@@richardsackler7627 yes but, how old we talking? Also when your partner can't measure up to the videos that does really dampen things, as guys are highly visual. It's the overwhelming factor for most, in terms of attraction and arousal, otherwise you may have to force it, which you should do anyway for a variety of reasons. But you can recover from that and it will be enjoyable. Only through Jesus though, otherwise you're screwed.
Glad we are touching this topic and the long term effect that birth control hormones has caused on woman’s life and society !
I was just sharing about this with a friend. sitting in the clinic is also part of the cycle, sorrowful, but greater joy at times then ever before. For one person, "they [hormonal birth control] just make me feel crazy."
Fascinating discussion from both. I love her in every interview I've seen, and have learned something new from her each time. She's just so casually engaged and well-informed about biology that no one else really seems directly involved in studying.
My significant other has been on birth control for almost 10 years and has recently stopped taking it, so this topic was of particular interest.
Also if by any chance you Jordan are reading this I just wanted to thank you from the bottom of my heart for the wisdom, knowledge and example you have brought to countless people across the globe all these years.
Hope you and your close ones are doing well!
I love this, and I hope that Jordan sees this and that you. I wish you and your S/O the best of luck!
One of the potentially huge problems with being in a relationship with someone on hormonal birth control the whole time youve been seeing each other is that some of them find completely different men attractive after they stop taking it, n to some its on a subconscious level like the smell of your pheromones
I think one of the things that is not talked about enough but should be bloody obvious, is how one major consequence of going off birth control is pregnancy and then having a child/children to raise. Even just the prospect if becoming pregnant could cause a shift in mindset in the woman. Raising an infant is a massive investment and puts her in a very vulnerable position, emotionally, physically and financially. This also has a massive impact on the way a woman will perceive their partner and on their relationship dynamic. Part of it is hormonally driven but the other thing is that the stakes have just become raised to an extreme very suddenly. Things that would not have bothered her before will suddenly become so important. The level of support and maturity she will expect from you will be so much higher than before. Sexual opportunity as well as desire may also drop between you due to the hormones, fatigue from all the new demands and building resentment over failing to meet the other's needs. A lot of couples will struggle a lot with these changing roles and expectations.
@@charlesthompson8013happened to me twice. The opposite of way around either time, from on to off, and then off to on. It definitely makes a difference.
You're fixing to become a single man.... best of luck.
I was on the pill for almost 25 years. I was naive like many young women, but took advantage of the benefits. Sorry to say at menopause, everything changed. I have never had symptom’s so bad. I read many blogs about menopause, but I had all the symptoms! All of them. I couldn’t sleep I was depressed, I had non stop hot flashes, and more. I was miserable. I finally got bio identical hormones and am better, but I fear I will never be able to go off these. I have tried, but all the worse symptoms come flying back as soon as I back off from my hormones. I know it was the pill that basically destroyed my normal hormones, and it is a hard reality to face.
I was on BC for about 7 years between 30 and 37 due to hemmoraghic ovarian cysts. I had 2 kids at the time. I went off hoping to have another baby. I noticed that my hormones were so different off the pill. My sex drive was much higher and enjoyment much heightened. I did have 2 more kids, the last at 40. I'm 55 in 2 months and am waiting for menopause. I don't have hot flashes, but definitely notice sleep issues, especially near my cycle.
you are so right! I started on BC at 16. Went off at times. Stopped taking the pill at 32. Had horrible menopause at 40 and had a hysterectomy at 41. I lamented the fact I didn't have my fourth child. That has always bothered me. Women should stay off the pill!
On the pill for 25 years, but was it worth it bc u could party and work and do whatever u wanted?
Menopause causes these symptoms whether you have a history of birth control use or not. It doesn't destroy your natural hormones, menopause IS a deficit in these hormones (more info on the internet). Your symptoms improved because of the hormone replacement- an indicated treatment for those who don't tolerate the symptoms of menopause well (it's awful for many during transition then improves). Birth control is also therapeutic in certain conditions such as PCOS which can cause a deficit of these hormones. It runs in families & my mom has it so I probably do too. Before starting 11 yrs ago, I had very abnormal cycles & chronic apathy not due to depression (once my grandma cried bc I "never cried"- maybe did 2x in a yr total). This medication made me feel normal- I wasn't overly emotional but I wasn't emotionless as I was prior. It also improved other things assoc w/PCOS (excessive hair growth) & targeted treatments of BCP such as acne & abnorm menstrual cycles. As w/all meds, side effects are highly variable (some have none, others have severe).
That was an absolutely fascinating, spirited and dynamic interview
As a homeschooling stay-at-home mom of 4, the part around 39 minutes where they are saying moms who don’t work outside the home have nothing to do is an utter joke. Come on over and I’ll give you plenty of work….
I think you misunderstood their point. They were talking about stay at home moms who only focus on their kids ans have no live outside of them.
1 kid vs 4 kids is a huge difference! Ill find out what 4 kids is like in a couple months :)
But maintaing the home and watching 1 child is a walk in the park compared to 4!
My wife was a healthy young woman. Once she took birth control, she had issues with digestion, random vaginal bleeding, and random strong cramping, among others. She overall always had something wrong with her body and didn’t feel like a healthy woman. Once we decided to have her stop it, she began feeling better and shortly after was almost back to normal. Digestion was never the same again though. We fear birth control a lot. Can’t believe doctors push this on women the way they do. They should be decertified if they don’t explain all these side effects which for many don’t outweigh the pro.
Oh no! Yes birth control greatly affects/changes your gut microbiome…which is possibly why her digestion isn’t the same. Definitely have her look into ways the might help restore it…that should help tremendously!
I don't take it for a long time I never get sick
exactly!
This is easily now within my top 3 favorite all-time conversations I've heard Dr. Peterson have on his TH-cam channel. Great talk, great topic, amazing amount of material covered, I learned so much, so many levels were explored. I loved that it was in person. That makes communicating so much easier and it's so physically evident. Please, more like this! Talk about those hard questions in-person! We see it.
This was brilliant, one of the best interview I've seen. Will certainly watch more of this lady, nice boots btw
This interview was extremely compelling all the way up to the final statement. Thank you for a very enjoyable event.
I had my IUD removed this week. I only had it for 2 months. I'm often given hormonal methods to give me relief from endometriosis. And every time I take myself off it because I HATE the way I feel on it. Bloated, fatigue, water retention, headaches, depression and no sex drive. And all my Drs and even some family members keep saying it's best to be on hormonal contraceptive and the alternative is irresponsible. It's just crazy that for me to choose my natural body is the "wrong" choice today.
I was heavily pressured by my OBGYN to keep taking hormonal contraceptives despite side effects that were making me miserable. I couldn't believe it, he downplayed my problems entirely.
Read the actual package inserts of any medication 🤯
Unfortunately, doctors don't know a lot about Endo. As far as I know, the only treatment is laparoscopic surgery with hormonal support and even then, it can come back.
Hysterectomy works too, but that's another can of worms.
It's a poorly understood issue with meh solutions.
My friend recently had her IUD get dislodged, had an ectopic pregnancy, bled out horrendously before getting medical treatment, and may have scarred her fallopian tubes to the point of having fertility issues. I would stay far away from the IUD.
Fascinating. I went off the pill when I read that it changes your way of thinking. Have then suffered with severe PMS and migraines every since. Now 51 patiently waiting for menopause... Great talk! Women should be taught this in school!!
Fantastic conversation. Thank you Jordan and Dr. Hill.
I am thankful for the opportunity, as someone from a non-English speaking country, to partake in these classes where we delve into a myriad of topics with experts from various fields. This gratitude stems from the instructor's skill not only in imparting knowledge but also in teaching us how to approach critical thinking, perspective, and even presentation, including attire.Greetings from Colombia.
I've listened to virtually every JBP lecture, interview, podcast at least once and this one is a real winner.... riveting.
My kids are now 4 (girl) and 2 (boy) and I wish I can remember about this interview when they are teenagers so I can clearly show them how sexuality matters, what drugs do to your brain and body and they can make they decisions. I’m totally buying her book now to use it later.
Buy her book and keep it on the shelf until then!
You can further your education on the matter. If something is fundamentally important to you, you won't require reminders.
I pray someone finds this comment in 10 years and likes it so you can come back to it lol ✊🏼❤️🙏
SAME!!! I wrote on every paper in my proximity a reminder to buy her book for my children!!!
Watched this with my daughter. Really appreciate this in depth discussion. Its really a must see for our young daughters and sons too.
What an incredible conversation . These two should have more podcasts together
This was an outstanding interview and conversation. Dr. Hill and JP should start a series.
Wow .... that was incredible . They listened to each other and were inspired to take it further for each other . Dr Sarah Hill is amazing and it was great to see JP's mind at work without confines ... to help us through it . A few hours of true brilliance .
What struck me most about this interesting interview was a deep sense of compatibility between these two.
It's sad that her conclusion is that her daughter being sexually active as a young person is inevitable. Maybe the problems could be taken care of if women would take back their moral responsibility. It sounds far better than this birth control path. Motherhood is such a beautiful honor within the confines of a loving relationship that has become a marriage. It sounds better than constant stress responses, devastating mistreatment by partners, and destroyed hormonal patterns, just to have sex with whomever you want whenever you want..
Agreed. I am glad I saved myself for marriage. I saved myself a lot of unnecessary drama. I really don't understand how sleeping around is seen as an advantage.
Yes. I think contraception in general is a big part of the problem, more than just the pill. Our contraceptive culture is destroying the soul of the human being.
Agreed. And this goes for men, too. Men used to be expected to participate in the preservation of a woman's virginity before marriage. The evolutionary biology types tend to reduce men down to their most base urges.
I totally agree. I think that’s another blind spot she has. Just accepting the sexual activity of a 16 year old dropped my jaw. The sex before marriage culture we have now which was largely enabled by birth control is also a huge problem. I hope JP does a whole interview on the effects of sex before marriage on mental health and marriage health and relational health in families.
Media is very powerful in shaping our perceptions of the world. Numbers are more frightening and reassuring at the same time: Kids are becoming active at a much younger age than ever now (think 5th and 6th grade). However, the percentage of teens who are sexually active is still at or under 50% depending on the data source. So, even in 2020 about half of all 18 and under are NOT sexually active, but those who are do so younger and more often. Clear impact of media consumption.
“I wonder if he’s got a brother?” Hahahaha
She is a cool and funny. (Obviously wicked smart)
This conversation was one I’ll watch multiple times. Thank you both!!!
Lunkhead that I am, I know enough to know I don't know enough, and yet when I heard that women on the pill have no cortisol response just floored me. Even if women are hormonaly frozen in the their cycle, at least that's not an abnormal chemical balance in and of itself. _Destroying_ an evolved chemical response system is just... wow.
I've been togheter with my wife for over 11 years now. The only time we ever used any birth control was a morning after pill after a night during a trip. Her friends are all on the pill and their longest relationship any of them have had is 3 years, plus they seem to get sick with a lot more frequency than my wife, and my wife has a chronic thyroid problem she has to control with medication.
We always were skeptical of birth control medication (I just have always used condoms), and this interview has really been eye opening. Thank you.
Wow. I didn't want this interview to end! Another two hours would have been fine.
Thank you for sharing.
I'm very blessed to have had 3 healthy children in my late 30's. Due to my traumatic past, it took me awhile to get my headspace straight, and luckily I was healthy enough to conceive 3 vibrant babies in 4 years; last infant at age 39.
My eldest, just coming to age, asked me about the pill, and I told her that it messes with your hormones, and you will view feminine men more attractive over masculine men. Her reaction, "Nope! Not putting that in my body." God bless her. ❤
Never used anything except 'the rubber',yet prefer less masculine men my whole life.
You would have turned lesbian by my calculations lol@@ST-yc7uj
@@ST-yc7uj statistical outliers will always exist. I am sure plenty of KPop stans aren't on birth control, but really love the way KPop mem look.
Thank you for sharing this. I had a tramuatic past too and it has taken me years to get my headspace right.... now I am ready to have a family but no husband to speak of. Quite distressing thinking I may never have a family.
Brilliant interview! Couldn’t stop watching. Thanks for making me procrastinate during this finals season.
I didn't know Dr. Sarah Hill but I've become a fan. This was a genuine good faith conversation.
Omg I learned so much I didn't know. I look at my life and see how bc has impacted me. I've been on it since 15. Depression, suicidal thoughts., lack of sexual drive, weight, stress adaptability. No desire to have children on and on. Bc may not be the only reasons but based on the change I experienced during the one year I got off of bc I can now understand how possible the hormones effecting me are. I am furious that I was not educated about this when I got on them. I didn't even know to look into it or where to look. This info just blows me away.
As a stay-at-home Mom (an older one, too) I do take a bit of umbrage at the implication that mothers who don't work outside the home (who don't have anything better to do, as I think I hear the implication here) are more susceptible to spoiling their children. In my experience, it is often the mothers who work outside of the home who feel the need to overcompensate for their lack of time/ attention to their children who spoil their kids (with a new gameboy, fast food, toys, etc). Often these mothers have one child, in later years, who they finally had after making amazing careers for themselves - and these careers are an on-going time drain and attention-getter, taking them away from their family lives. I loved this talk until this came up - and it really disappoints me (because, once again, stay-at-home moms - that "invisible minority" - are seen as people who don't work, and maybe don't even "have a life" for their children to see).
Motherhood has been so demonized in our culture that it's no surprise that the mentality slips in here too every so often. Keep fighting the good fight as that invisible minority raising the next generation of people well.
I see you. You’re not invisible. I think she was getting at the older woman of one child with lots of resources rather than the busy mother of two or three young kids who is busy all day caring for them.
I am an older stay-at-home mom too but I don’t think they were trying to offend. They’re talking about the helicopter mom. They were saying it’s important for mothers to have their own interests not just their children and showing your children that too. I don’t have a “job” but I am constantly working in the house by making things from scratch, taking care of the home, taking care of others, serving in our community…I invite them into that.
Totally agree with @katyeads1627. My mother-in-law is a sweetheart but she needs something to do other than run her grown children's lives. We have a young family and doing our part to raise our family but now that her kids are grown and have families of their own, she has nothing to do. No interests, no hobbies, no community involvement. I genuinely feel she gets bored and spends way too much time worrying about her children and all the ways she can "help" by taking our learning opportunities away from us. I dont think this interview was trying to offend, but being on the receiving end of helicopter parents is smothering. They've had their life experiences, we want to have them too.
❤exactly . Your child probably didn’t get exposed to cartoons which encouraged them to jump on sofas svd furniture sbd be defiant like my daughter who was in total care of by the exwife who have her the smart phone to distract her
I was on hormonal birth control for 3 months before my wedding and 3 months after (huge regrets because it majorly messed up my metabolism and gave me mood swings), and I accepted my husband's proposal long before I was on birth control. We have been married almost 17 years. Our marriage has had its ups and downs, but I love him more than I did on our wedding day.
Thank you for bringing light to this subject!
Dr. Peterson, thanks for inviting Dr. Sarah Hill. She did a fantastic job explaining her work. I rate this episode in the top 10 of your channel. Thanks for sharing
One of the most educational talks I've ever heard as a woman.
Thank you both.
Nahh thats a top class conversation with an ocean of knowledge.
This conversation is so relevant and important and extremely underrated.
TY JP. I shared this interview with my 3 daughters and wife. I hope they watch it in its entirety.
My biggest regret is getting on birth control when I was 15. I was on it for 12 years and finally got off it because I hated how it made me feel and not feel. I am thankful that it did its job and I never got pregnant, but I can't wrap my head around how much damage it has done to my body/mind.