Bingo! I'll occasionally present people's mistakes (usually anonymously whenever possible, which gossipers hate) or successes (something you'll almost never hear from gossipers) as opportunities to learn about proper or improper behavior. In other words, I'm trying to siphon wisdom and guidance from people's experiences. Gossiping to complain is so freaking destructive, I can't stand it! Gossipers are like vampires feeding off of people's apparent misfortunes. Very pathetic. As an adjunct to this, I find it laughable that "extremists" like me are accused, usually by gossipers, of not having many friends, meanwhile many of these people base a good chunk of their lives on bottom-feeding, lies, and deceit and because their lives are often despicably ignoble they feel the need to project, seek out, and hang on these tendencies in others, thereby exposing them to other gossipers. It's a vicious cycle of unproductivity in life. Don't get caught in other people's self-destruction and don't fall into these tendencies yourself.
So is triangulation, for example bosses expect employees not to talk about pay and some depend on it so they don't find out 1 persons being paid more and doing less usually the kiss azz.
I heard a manager was bad mouthing me saying that I think that I’m all that and I was not happy at all. And I even heard from another manager that she was talking about me which I associate with jealousy because I am pretty attractive. And I brushed it off but when it kept happening I did something about it and still she kept on even after I left that store.
Sad that most managers/leaders, when a TARGET of gossip does exactly what Dave says (have a negative? lift it UP a level to someone that can HELP)... instead turn the knives on the victim and make their life a living hell, for speaking up.
About 30 years ago when I was working at lunch hour there was a bunch of women sitting off in the corner yacking away about somebody's sex life and I thought to myself how disgusting so I sat way at the other end of the lunchroom and they asked me to join them and I said are you kidding join you and your filthy mouth and talking behind your husband you should be ashamed of yourself well they didn't like me since then and I didn't care cuz I'm very outspoken when it comes to gossip I can't handle it because they're screwed up in the head and once you ruin my trust you've lost my trust for years
It's good to have someone to share with, most times it's a friend or family but when it's toxic, it's no longer offloading or confiding because we need that for our own mind peace.. it's toxic when there is a twisting of your story, never in it's context or perspective. That's gossip, when your tribe stirs up a nasty version of that person they actually loathe or envy but pretend you're both OK so that you never cut ties, gossip in it's extreme form, narcissist stuff... when you're in a smear campaign is no different to murder, which leaves your family grieving whereas with toxic gossip, it is a character assassination and rejection a murder of your living self while having to face life with shame and seeing your kids/mom /sister look at you with deep disdain
This is so true. I worked in a place that was so bad I went home in tears everyday. Mine actually went beyond gossip to bullying. Leadership did nothing. They never followed through and fired anyone.
Same. I quit a job over it. It was a lab full of women who always had a scapegoat they were kicking around. Initially I thought the scapegoat was doing things incompetently and the group of older women were trying to correct problems. Then I noticed they’d move to a new person to focus their constant complaints and criticism. That their victims weren’t doing anything technically incorrect and that it was personal attacking I was observing. I saw them do it to 3 ppl one after another with the end point being the nervous breakdown of the targeted employee. That was disturbing when I realized there was a pattern of behavior. I thought as a nightshifter I’ll just stay out of it and do my job so well they’ll never choose me to do that to. I was wrong. It started happening to me. I started coming to work and finding notes in my locker, emails from my boss asking me to explain why I didn’t do this or why I did something the way I did. I would go home devasted and in tears. Couldn’t sleep and I realized what was happening and RAN to the hospital one town over, got hired on the spot because good night techs are hard to find and turned in my two week notice abruptly one week into discovering I’d been targeted by the menopausal dayshift clique of terrorists. Left them with no night tech for 4 nights of their week. They got to rotate nights until they could hire someone else. It’s been over ten years since that place and thinking about it still brings up feelings of the hurt, anger and betrayal over being targeted for that abuse despite working really hard to avoid it. I hate gossipers. I just want to do my job in peace. I will bluntly tell a piece of 💩 who tries to engage in this behavior with me to go contaminate somewhere else. I will quit a job where management supports this behavior.
Karen Abrams You couldn’t of said it better. I am disabled and worked my job for 20 years. I loved that job but the people were awful. I ended up getting sick and being in the hospital for 3 months. They got there wish and I never returned. They were trying to get me to leave so they could have my job. Part of my job was auditing for mistakes. When I would try and help them realize the mistake and how to correct it I was talked so rude to. Because of my disability I ended up getting long term disability and my SSDI and never had to return.
I hope hostile work environments created by manipulative gossiping bullies gets dealt with in the future like what Dave says he does. One warning then fired. That would make so many workplaces better for so many ppl who just want to do their work in peace sans unnecessary destructive drama. Sorry that happened to you. That’s a soul crushing demoralizing hurtful mess. ☹️
I definitely got some satisfaction out of swiftly sticking my bullies with my job that I know they didn’t want. It took them 6 months to get a new night tech and they had to resort to a temp agency. 😈
Gossip can also damage an innocent person’s reputation in the workplace and the energy vampires and narcissists will find ways to make that person miserable to the point where the tight nit social group can leave that person isolated like they don’t exist
I'm a victim of that. Coworkers actually stopped talking to me because of a rumor somebody who I didn't know spreaded about me. These were coworkers whi actually used to smile and talked to Mr while asking me how my day was going.
@@brandonray4379 Narcissists are very smart like this in a Corporation, but you want to know what’s crazy? At a Company function party with food and there is no work involved…they will blend in with you to get any information out of you
@@ilovemybeard3394 Yeah they will fake befriend you to get information from you. Sad. I pick up very well on non-verbal cues. I had a lot of typos in my last comment.
I am guilty of gossip, but I am really trying to stop, now when I hear some say something negative about someone else I say what do you think others are saying about you. They stay quiet. Work is the biggest gossip trap I eat lunch by myself, and keep conversations quick. I meditate on my lunch in my car and listen to music. I feel at peace rather than listening to coworkers complain for an hour on their lunch time.
I do not gossip, but I find myself sometimes listening to gossip and getting dragged into it, but I do hate it. So I try to work on it that I stay out of that conversations. It is sometimes nit easy if you have to work with someone who is constantly gossiping. I don't know how to stop them and it feels also awkward not to engage in their conversation. Then you have that awkward silence.....
I hate gossips too. It creates strain on relationships for no reasons and creates enemies with people who do not need to be at odds. I am trying to get my boss to address this problem at work.
That's not a problem with the guidance. That's a problem with the manager or supervisor. The guidance is perfect. The manager and supervisor should also be abiding by this guidance... as Dave Ramsey (the *head* of his organization) actually does.
@@UriyahYasharal you missed the point of what Marion was saying. The issue bigger then gossip is when the managers and supervisors are apart of the problem. Who do you truly turn to when not only the co workers are doing this but the people who are supposed to be in charge and leaders are doing it also? Makes matters even more crazy.
Right on. I had a "new manager" that would complain to me all the time about other team members. At first i couldn't figure out why, or how to take it. I lust listened, assuming he was "venting" ? Eventually realized he was doing the same to me. Talk to Jim about what a jerk Fred is, then tell Fred what a jerk Sally is, then tell Sally what a jerk Chris is, then tell Christ what a jerk... Jim is. Full circle.
@VenerableBede2510 he was trying to get employees emotional so they would go and tell on each other mistakes. The manager causing work harassment for employees. Eventually this would lead to some poor employee getting fired for no reason. Infact that manager should be fired.
If you walk in a room and people stop talking it's generally because YOU DON'T ENGAGE IN GOSSIP. If they are gossiping about you, who the heck cares. They often respect you by shutting up like little kids.
This is a true leader. Very inspiring. I love the no nonsense approach. It is incredibly difficult to work in a toxic environment and it comes from the top down!
It doesn't happen in work only but it happens outside. Gossiping is disgusting and we should respect each other instead of digging into other people's bussiness.
Joshua Cox, same thing in the Navy helo squadron I was attached to many years ago. It’s the reason I left the Navy. The immaturity was at a level I never thought imaginable. And to think people call all the people in the military a hero. Oh, I beg to differ.
Yes, same thing in a company. And we work so close together with that co workers, more time spent with them than being with friends or family members. So sometimes I am telling things about my privat life because it helps to talk about it with someone, but later I regret it, when I find out it is just the best news for them to spread around.
Got some years and miles on me and I've never seen or heard of a group of people with the gossiping disease being cured. People who want to get away from gossip have to break away and not participate. I've started telling people to go and say it to the persons face if they want to talk about them. Once I tell someone that or make it clear that I don't talk about people behind their backs then I hear less gossip from those folks and the people they know. I have to work really hard to not talk about anyone behind their backs because I have a tendency to slip toward gossip myself. Gossip is not so much something that people do as it is an aspect of their character. Different companies have different personalities because they encourage or discourage different things. That's how all the people in a department can end up with similar characteristics. One time I worked at a place where all the engineers and supervisors in a particular department ended up having the same character flaws because the dominant personality in the department ran off anyone he couldn't manipulate. An environment that is full of gossip attracts more gossip. As an individual who shuns gossip I have found that gossiping environments shun me back. A whole company that shuns gossip is like the emerald city or Atlantis, it just seems like a dream.
Bosses just need policies like Dave's. That's it. Fire anyone after the first warning. Most people will stop doing it at work if they're scared for their jobs. The gossip problems at my side hustle are not stopped because of poor leadership not wanting to offend anyone. If you start firing ppl everyone else will fall in line. It's also up to ppl of good character to tell ppl who gossip plainly that they don't want anything to do with it. The more ppl do that the less ppl gossips have to gossip with. Then they'll just do it at happy hour after work hours. It won't fix their character but it will change the location.
Michele Nichols Yes, but the problem is that its a lack of leadership that leads to the problem in the first place. Correcting those problems once they are going is like trying to stop a freight train.
I really hate gossip and what pisses me off is the fact that it's almost a not-a-concern thing around so many places in this country. I think the problem is in people's education only as Dave always mentions.
I salute Dave Ramsey for this boldness and intolerance of this in his staff and flock. I had to report gossip about us from leadership at a church and the leaders of the church were very dismissive and didn't care that there was gossip and they went and told the person we reported what we said 😕
I despise gossip. It is a waste of breath, time, and energy that can used for more productive things. Hence why, though I work with others, I prefer to work alone to tune out the noise.
Lol! Me too 😂😂. I tell my friends and my husband my dream job is to work on the Ramsey team😍. Problem is I live in TEXAS! How do I make this happen 🤔? Hahaha 😂😂😂!!!
I've worked at the same place since 2010. Turn over is high, but the same group of gossipers are there. I started their fresh out of school. I was actually less than fresh. It took me a year to find a job. Even though I kept my skills up by volunteering, my experience was basic. My supervisor and her bullies talked about me to the point I was ashamed to ask questions. I needed the job so I just did my best and just accepted that workplace culture. Others came and went, saying how toxic the environment is. Another young lady and myself stay because we feel we won't find anything better. After all there is mess at every place. At least we know this mess. Well this year I became so fed up I finally went to my supervisor, the root of all the gossip. I apologized to her for not meeting her expectations when I was hired. I told her but i am determined to have a better relationship with you. So everyday I make it my business to say hi and make sincere small talk with her. It's always short but it's eases my psyche. Nope the gossip and intimidation hadn't stopped, but I am not as anxious around her.
I always WORKED during work hours instead of discussing my personal life and that of my coworkers. So I was able to leave about an hour or two after school got out and go home with an empty book bag.
I go to work, real quiet and keep to myself, don't know nobody but my name is always in other people's mouth and I don't know what it is that I'm doing.
leadership that WON'T genuinely LISTEN, creates built up pressure between employees that organically makes this happen. Leaders need to TRULY listen to concerns, not argue with empolyees that people with concerns are wrong, or dumb, or bad.
I divorced a male gossip, only to find a church full of gossips, to flee all my family members who became like the church gossips. I now know no more gossips, and life is now peaceful. Eliminate every gossip from your life if you ever want joy and peace.
Me too. I HATE gossippers and slanderous the worst are bosses who encourage gossiping staff. Glad you ate not one of them I left jobs because of slandering gossiping colleagues.
“He who repeats a matter alienates a friend.”-Prov. 16:28 AS "Whoever forgives* a transgression seeks love, But the one who keeps harping on a matter separates close friends." Prov 17:9,
This is how I would handle my company if I had one. 😁 I worked for a toxic law firm and the only reason gossip continued was because the kiss asses were involved in it with management. Horrible law firm.
Recently I did this...handing the problem to leadership. All leadership did was call a meeting, allowed me to be spoke over, inforced that being snippy and biting each others heads off is normal among co workers, which I know better and then went onto suggest that I invent things and imagine things. This was in response to a 29 year old male student (who is married with a 2 year old) saying I am going to come over there and slap you, one of these days I am going to get out of my chair and come over there and slap you so hard. He went onto to say stuff about me to other students in the classroom. We are Radiology Technology students. I am a 48 year old female. I raised the issue after class to the instructor. And she set a precedent that it is okay! All because I was objecting to quiz and test dates being changed because notorious procrastinators once again had not studied!
Hi Dave, I was the brunt of gossip by my narcopathic, obsessive compulsive and depressive middle brother and narcopathic, obsessive compulsive and depressive middle sister! It drove me bonkers and bananas enough that I eventually went no contact with both of them, let alone my schedule didn't allow much time for them! I was constantly off to music classes and clubs, I've gone no contact with them for real now, it sucks in a way! They're my family, it's the hoping who I thought they were and not getting it that hurts! I don't blame you, congrats! Take care and thanks!
Dave is right. Gossip always comes from the dopes. I too would fire gossipers. They are false witnesses and unfortunately, people actually are such dullards they believe it and perpetuate it, regardless of all that you have done for others. Make them poor for evil behavior.
Though I like his boldness I agree he did come off a bit harsh at the beginning. Since we are all born into sin gossip is just another human trait along with the rest of our imperfections.
As someone who can’t stand gossip and keep my mouth shut when caught of the middle of it, I wholeheartedly support this. I shouldn’t have to walk into work hearing about the sheer level of toxicity amongst my peers because people can’t keep their mouth shut. It’s not hard to stay in your lane and not put people down behind their back. How can you trust anyone who has no scruples about badmouthing others to you? Surely they will talk about you in a negative light.
I've had people gossip about my work performance. The problem is that people will talk about you. Not just in the work environment, but the world will. That's fine if people want to talk about me, it just puts a fire under me to become a better, faster employee.
I hate when the person doesn't go to you about whatever their feeling. Why go tell someone else when you could just be honest with that person. Say hey, I really don't like what you said or, hey I can't help you with that. The dumbest thing is that grown adults will do this high school crap. I'm 22 and too old for that.
I have done this. I have passed the problems of bullying, micromanaging, mocking, gossiping, creating rumors, among others about a coworker, who happens to have 2 responsibilities in the school. One as my coworker and another as a supervisor of a team. Management have spoken to her over and over and nothing else gets done. Not warnings, not threat to get fired, not being suspended, nothing just a quick talk with the headteacher. A few people have come forward complaining about similar situations with her, so it's not just me who has experienced difficulty with this bad coworker/supervisor's behaviour. Still nothing gets done, she is still working there and it's continuing to do to other people the same she did to me and others who has already left.
" Whoever guards his mouth and tongue, keeps his soul from trouble". LOVE IT! If most women, especially blk lived by that rule, the divorce rate just might be a bit lower!
Working with gossip is one thing but working with a hard ass and coworkers who will sell you out b/c they’re afraid of the boss is another. I’d rather work navigate the office politics Game of Thrones style. I stay away from gossip
I wish this guy was a manager where I work. It is nothing but gossip and nothing and I mean absolutely nothing is off limits. And if you complain to management or HR they only pretend to want to help but never take any action and then later you find out that they are joining in on the gossip sessions. There are so many lies and rumors bouncing around the place you never know what to believe. And the people have all known each other for so long it doesn't really do any good to complain. I just keep to myself most of the time at work and that in itself makes me a target.
I just made a video on this! Gossiping is so destructive to your life. When you get rid of it it’s like taking junk food out of your diet! You don’t realize all the additional stress it brings to your life until you stop doing it. I wish the best for all of you!
I was trying to meet a new friend and I should have took note that right when I met them they were talking about someone else. They have talked about somebody else every single day. I had to let go in that so-called friend because if people are talking about others and don't want to be solution-minded or be helpful to others then soon they will be talking about you. I just can't have that kind of spirit around me. It's better to be positive and supportive of people and productive than to tear people down I just can't be a part of People not do that. And so I was looking up this topic on gossip and I found this and I think I pretty much feel the same
Also important to make a distinction in 'gossip' and 'genuine criticism'. workers are a part of the process. Every bigger company i have joined has always said change can come from the bottom or the top or anywhere between. we have valuable input as well as complaints and gossip.
Preventing gossip is mainly about having communication and being direct. I think people think gossiping is simply a healthy manifestation of venting, but it is more toxic than that. A coworker is a coworker, not a friend. They can be a friend outside of work, but your relationship must be purely professional inside the walls of your workplace
Some Gossiping stems from workers, employees, co-workers, ect..having problems that are above their pay grade and them taking it up the ladder and NOTHING is done about it.. this includes ideas, solutions to a problem that saves money and falls on deaf ears because it doesn’t concern/ affect upper management so they give not a shit! Gossip seems to be a natural outlet to let people vent that can’t get the help they need/ want from co-workers/ bosses... I could be wrong but sure seems like it to me.
This doesn’t apply to truly mean hateful people who have no control over their attitudes and or emotions towards otherwise peaceful individuals. I agree with Dave also but what’s the solution?
Venting is natural and healthy, at home. Not at work. You're at work. So work. Dave isn't saying to not vent, he's saying to keep that out of the workplace. If you took the problem up the chain of command and nothing happened, then build some social currency in your workplace and try again. Gossip is never okay.
Kenneth See Social currency? Doesn’t exist. Even if it did you wouldn’t need it if the place was run properly. Thank you for your attempt towards a solution.
Hi Dave, could you please come to South Shore Hospital in South Weymouth Massachusetts and please talk to the entire Operating Room staff. The gossip here is beyond belief. If it was acid it would dissolve metal in minutes.
Where I work, on the other hand, is GOSSIP CITY! I work at a supermarket, and you hear everything about everyone at one point or another! If someone came in and fired every single gossip like he suggests, there wouldn't be anyone left to shut the lights off and lock the doors and arm the security systems! To some point gossiping is tradition in any job where you work with the public, I am sure there's some nasty things circulating, and it shouldn't, but it does happen in the company and the workplace, it had for decades. The different things that circulate around the old water cooler and so on.
What is the dividing line between staying safe by keeping immediate family members informed on your day to day experiences and only gossip is not always easily discerned. Like when gossiping about someone who according to someone is only lazy while not willing to work too.
I got a text from a church lady who said she heard my husband had covid. I told her he didn’t!! His co workers were sick but no one had covid. She wouldn’t tell me who mentioned this lie to her. I’m curious who told it myself.
I wonder how does someone deal with an employer not enforcing policy. For example I notice many new employees where I work are lazy and don't seem to care about their jobs or learning anything about their duties (through the course of monthly evaluations there is no improvement). We have a high number of call offs. Where I'm at new employees are suppose to be on probationary status (6 months) and can't have more then 3 call offs (all of them have had more then 6 in the past 4 months) and previously if you agreed to cover an extra shift and then call off on the day you were suppose to work the shift you were subject to suspension (every week someone does this) . I can only do write ups and documentations but nothing when it comes to attendance. Only upper management has the ability to suspend or fire employees for this and it doesn't happen often (rules being enforced). I notice when the bad employees are able to run a muck eventually it creates a toxic environment where even the better workers start to become lazy/unmotivated. How is one suppose to deal with that? I suppose I could approach the owners but I'm afraid of the can of worms I could be opening up If I do. Lol
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Problem is most people who gossip about problems aren’t looking for a solution. They just want to complain.
I agree with you. Curious if the Ramsey crew is able to differentiate between gossiping and venting.
Bingo! I'll occasionally present people's mistakes (usually anonymously whenever possible, which gossipers hate) or successes (something you'll almost never hear from gossipers) as opportunities to learn about proper or improper behavior. In other words, I'm trying to siphon wisdom and guidance from people's experiences. Gossiping to complain is so freaking destructive, I can't stand it! Gossipers are like vampires feeding off of people's apparent misfortunes. Very pathetic.
As an adjunct to this, I find it laughable that "extremists" like me are accused, usually by gossipers, of not having many friends, meanwhile many of these people base a good chunk of their lives on bottom-feeding, lies, and deceit and because their lives are often despicably ignoble they feel the need to project, seek out, and hang on these tendencies in others, thereby exposing them to other gossipers. It's a vicious cycle of unproductivity in life. Don't get caught in other people's self-destruction and don't fall into these tendencies yourself.
This right here^^^
It's just fun!
@@bradleymaravalli2851 I agree Brad! No one would gossip about him, he's too dull!
Gossip is rarely about the target. Instead, it’s usually about the gossiper, and that person’s need for attention and drama.
Gossip is SO toxic, I wish more managers /directors would have this mindset.
Sometimes managers and directors are the culprits causing strife between their staff.
@@LBright4444 Sad but sometimes true.
So is triangulation, for example bosses expect employees not to talk about pay and some depend on it so they don't find out 1 persons being paid more and doing less usually the kiss azz.
I heard a manager was bad mouthing me saying that I think that I’m all that and I was not happy at all. And I even heard from another manager that she was talking about me which I associate with jealousy because I am pretty attractive. And I brushed it off but when it kept happening I did something about it and still she kept on even after I left that store.
Sad that most managers/leaders, when a TARGET of gossip does exactly what Dave says (have a negative? lift it UP a level to someone that can HELP)... instead turn the knives on the victim and make their life a living hell, for speaking up.
'No Gossip Policy' needs to be adopted at all workplaces!
Yes
About 30 years ago when I was working at lunch hour there was a bunch of women sitting off in the corner yacking away about somebody's sex life and I thought to myself how disgusting so I sat way at the other end of the lunchroom and they asked me to join them and I said are you kidding join you and your filthy mouth and talking behind your husband you should be ashamed of yourself well they didn't like me since then and I didn't care cuz I'm very outspoken when it comes to gossip I can't handle it because they're screwed up in the head and once you ruin my trust you've lost my trust for years
YES, I TOTALLY AGREE. THERE WOULD BE LESS STRESS AND MORE TEAMWORK.
For the entire World! Fear God!
It needs to be adopted in all places
Gossip isn’t just one of the most toxic and disrespectful issues in the workplace. It also plagues and destroys families.
I feel you!
It's good to have someone to share with, most times it's a friend or family but when it's toxic, it's no longer offloading or confiding because we need that for our own mind peace.. it's toxic when there is a twisting of your story, never in it's context or perspective. That's gossip, when your tribe stirs up a nasty version of that person they actually loathe or envy but pretend you're both OK so that you never cut ties, gossip in it's extreme form, narcissist stuff... when you're in a smear campaign is no different to murder, which leaves your family grieving whereas with toxic gossip, it is a character assassination and rejection a murder of your living self while having to face life with shame and seeing your kids/mom /sister look at you with deep disdain
True but you can distance yourself from family, not much you can do when it’s co workers
This is so true. I worked in a place that was so bad I went home in tears everyday. Mine actually went beyond gossip to bullying. Leadership did nothing. They never followed through and fired anyone.
Christine C This is so TRUE Christine!!! I'm dealing with this right now!!
Same. I quit a job over it. It was a lab full of women who always had a scapegoat they were kicking around. Initially I thought the scapegoat was doing things incompetently and the group of older women were trying to correct problems. Then I noticed they’d move to a new person to focus their constant complaints and criticism. That their victims weren’t doing anything technically incorrect and that it was personal attacking I was observing. I saw them do it to 3 ppl one after another with the end point being the nervous breakdown of the targeted employee. That was disturbing when I realized there was a pattern of behavior. I thought as a nightshifter I’ll just stay out of it and do my job so well they’ll never choose me to do that to. I was wrong. It started happening to me. I started coming to work and finding notes in my locker, emails from my boss asking me to explain why I didn’t do this or why I did something the way I did. I would go home devasted and in tears. Couldn’t sleep and I realized what was happening and RAN to the hospital one town over, got hired on the spot because good night techs are hard to find and turned in my two week notice abruptly one week into discovering I’d been targeted by the menopausal dayshift clique of terrorists. Left them with no night tech for 4 nights of their week. They got to rotate nights until they could hire someone else. It’s been over ten years since that place and thinking about it still brings up feelings of the hurt, anger and betrayal over being targeted for that abuse despite working really hard to avoid it. I hate gossipers. I just want to do my job in peace. I will bluntly tell a piece of 💩 who tries to engage in this behavior with me to go contaminate somewhere else. I will quit a job where management supports this behavior.
Karen Abrams You couldn’t of said it better. I am disabled and worked my job for 20 years. I loved that job but the people were awful. I ended up getting sick and being in the hospital for 3 months. They got there wish and I never returned. They were trying to get me to leave so they could have my job. Part of my job was auditing for mistakes. When I would try and help them realize the mistake and how to correct it I was talked so rude to. Because of my disability I ended up getting long term disability and my SSDI and never had to return.
I hope hostile work environments created by manipulative gossiping bullies gets dealt with in the future like what Dave says he does. One warning then fired. That would make so many workplaces better for so many ppl who just want to do their work in peace sans unnecessary destructive drama. Sorry that happened to you. That’s a soul crushing demoralizing hurtful mess. ☹️
I definitely got some satisfaction out of swiftly sticking my bullies with my job that I know they didn’t want. It took them 6 months to get a new night tech and they had to resort to a temp agency. 😈
Gossip can also damage an innocent person’s reputation in the workplace and the energy vampires and narcissists will find ways to make that person miserable to the point where the tight nit social group can leave that person isolated like they don’t exist
Oh, I can personally relate to that. I worked two years in such place and I'm left with a trauma from the same.
I'm a victim of that. Coworkers actually stopped talking to me because of a rumor somebody who I didn't know spreaded about me.
These were coworkers whi actually used to smile and talked to Mr while asking me how my day was going.
@@brandonray4379
Narcissists are very smart like this in a Corporation, but you want to know what’s crazy?
At a Company function party with food and there is no work involved…they will blend in with you to get any information out of you
@@ilovemybeard3394 Yeah they will fake befriend you to get information from you. Sad. I pick up very well on non-verbal cues.
I had a lot of typos in my last comment.
I'm all about that it's like 10 times worse in Connecticut
Gossip and drama go hand-in-hand.
I am guilty of gossip, but I am really trying to stop, now when I hear some say something negative about someone else I say what do you think others are saying about you. They stay quiet. Work is the biggest gossip trap I eat lunch by myself, and keep conversations quick. I meditate on my lunch in my car and listen to music. I feel at peace rather than listening to coworkers complain for an hour on their lunch time.
It’s also an addiction I’ve personally struggled with it so I understand
I do not gossip, but I find myself sometimes listening to gossip and getting dragged into it, but I do hate it. So I try to work on it that I stay out of that conversations. It is sometimes nit easy if you have to work with someone who is constantly gossiping. I don't know how to stop them and it feels also awkward not to engage in their conversation. Then you have that awkward silence.....
I hate gossips too. It creates strain on relationships for no reasons and creates enemies with people who do not need to be at odds. I am trying to get my boss to address this problem at work.
Gossip is toxic,may God deliver us from it!!!
The only problem with this guidance is....if the managers and supervisors are the ones gossiping.
That's not a problem with the guidance. That's a problem with the manager or supervisor. The guidance is perfect. The manager and supervisor should also be abiding by this guidance... as Dave Ramsey (the *head* of his organization) actually does.
@@UriyahYasharal you missed the point of what Marion was saying. The issue bigger then gossip is when the managers and supervisors are apart of the problem. Who do you truly turn to when not only the co workers are doing this but the people who are supposed to be in charge and leaders are doing it also? Makes matters even more crazy.
Right on. I had a "new manager" that would complain to me all the time about other team members. At first i couldn't figure out why, or how to take it. I lust listened, assuming he was "venting" ? Eventually realized he was doing the same to me. Talk to Jim about what a jerk Fred is, then tell Fred what a jerk Sally is, then tell Sally what a jerk Chris is, then tell Christ what a jerk... Jim is. Full circle.
@VenerableBede2510 he was trying to get employees emotional so they would go and tell on each other mistakes. The manager causing work harassment for employees. Eventually this would lead to some poor employee getting fired for no reason. Infact that manager should be fired.
If you walk in a room and people stop talking it's generally because YOU DON'T ENGAGE IN GOSSIP. If they are gossiping about you, who the heck cares. They often respect you by shutting up like little kids.
This is a true leader. Very inspiring. I love the no nonsense approach. It is incredibly difficult to work in a toxic environment and it comes from the top down!
We need Bosses like this in todays Workplace...Hard-nosed, No-nonsense, and a man of Integrity 💯
Indeed look for solutions only
You mean a tyrant who hates free speech.
It doesn't happen in work only but it happens outside. Gossiping is disgusting and we should respect each other instead of digging into other people's bussiness.
I’m in the navy, on a ship of 350 people, and this so true. You do or say one little thing. The whole ship knows about within an hour.
Joshua Cox, same thing in the Navy helo squadron I was attached to many years ago. It’s the reason I left the Navy. The immaturity was at a level I never thought imaginable. And to think people call all the people in the military a hero. Oh, I beg to differ.
Yes, same thing in a company. And we work so close together with that co workers, more time spent with them than being with friends or family members. So sometimes I am telling things about my privat life because it helps to talk about it with someone, but later I regret it, when I find out it is just the best news for them to spread around.
Amen. Gossip is destructive.
Every time I opened the door to my work place I heard gossip. I’d love to work for this guy their would be no stress at all what so ever.
I want to work at a place that has a no gossip policy so bad I can taste it.
Yeah me too. Whenever I bring up this type of stuff at my work it doesn't seem to change even if I get affirmations. And I've taken it up the chain.
Got some years and miles on me and I've never seen or heard of a group of people with the gossiping disease being cured. People who want to get away from gossip have to break away and not participate. I've started telling people to go and say it to the persons face if they want to talk about them. Once I tell someone that or make it clear that I don't talk about people behind their backs then I hear less gossip from those folks and the people they know. I have to work really hard to not talk about anyone behind their backs because I have a tendency to slip toward gossip myself. Gossip is not so much something that people do as it is an aspect of their character. Different companies have different personalities because they encourage or discourage different things. That's how all the people in a department can end up with similar characteristics. One time I worked at a place where all the engineers and supervisors in a particular department ended up having the same character flaws because the dominant personality in the department ran off anyone he couldn't manipulate. An environment that is full of gossip attracts more gossip. As an individual who shuns gossip I have found that gossiping environments shun me back. A whole company that shuns gossip is like the emerald city or Atlantis, it just seems like a dream.
Bosses just need policies like Dave's. That's it. Fire anyone after the first warning. Most people will stop doing it at work if they're scared for their jobs. The gossip problems at my side hustle are not stopped because of poor leadership not wanting to offend anyone. If you start firing ppl everyone else will fall in line. It's also up to ppl of good character to tell ppl who gossip plainly that they don't want anything to do with it. The more ppl do that the less ppl gossips have to gossip with. Then they'll just do it at happy hour after work hours. It won't fix their character but it will change the location.
Michele Nichols EXACTLY!!!
Michele Nichols
Yes, but the problem is that its a lack of leadership that leads to the problem in the first place. Correcting those problems once they are going is like trying to stop a freight train.
I like this guy and wish more companies would take this approach. He's direct and to the point.
I really hate gossip and what pisses me off is the fact that it's almost a not-a-concern thing around so many places in this country. I think the problem is in people's education only as Dave always mentions.
I salute Dave Ramsey for this boldness and intolerance of this in his staff and flock. I had to report gossip about us from leadership at a church and the leaders of the church were very dismissive and didn't care that there was gossip and they went and told the person we reported what we said 😕
The sad part is I know managers who gossip and it destroys many reputations.
workplaces are a cesspool of gossip and backstabbing mostly out of jealousy
A woman here at work put up a sign at her desk that reads, "No gossip zone." :)
Lisa Dinan Ashley I like her!
*and now everyone gossips about her, including you.*
@@haza123b4 Well, devil's advocate. I hardly think telling us about it constitutes gossip. Now, if she elaborated, that would be.
nice
What they tell you in 12 step about gossip is that it undermines relationships.. I'm having a problem with it at work right now and I hate it.
I need a boss like Dave.
Me too! He's the best! ☺️🙏✨💙
He sticks his nose in his employees personal lives, no thanks
If people only lived like this…..what a wonderful world it would be. Such a way of time and energy.
I despise gossip. It is a waste of breath, time, and energy that can used for more productive things. Hence why, though I work with others, I prefer to work alone to tune out the noise.
Want to start working alone in my house
Sending him my resume.... Sounds like a good environment he maintains there.
Lol! Me too 😂😂. I tell my friends and my husband my dream job is to work on the Ramsey team😍. Problem is I live in TEXAS! How do I make this happen 🤔? Hahaha 😂😂😂!!!
I've worked at the same place since 2010. Turn over is high, but the same group of gossipers are there. I started their fresh out of school. I was actually less than fresh. It took me a year to find a job. Even though I kept my skills up by volunteering, my experience was basic. My supervisor and her bullies talked about me to the point I was ashamed to ask questions. I needed the job so I just did my best and just accepted that workplace culture. Others came and went, saying how toxic the environment is. Another young lady and myself stay because we feel we won't find anything better. After all there is mess at every place. At least we know this mess. Well this year I became so fed up I finally went to my supervisor, the root of all the gossip. I apologized to her for not meeting her expectations when I was hired. I told her but i am determined to have a better relationship with you. So everyday I make it my business to say hi and make sincere small talk with her. It's always short but it's eases my psyche. Nope the gossip and intimidation hadn't stopped, but I am not as anxious around her.
LaT How God bless you Gossip is so draining
Hopefully you've found something better.
I always WORKED during work hours instead of discussing my personal life and that of my coworkers. So I was able to leave about an hour or two after school got out and go home with an empty book bag.
I go to work, real quiet and keep to myself, don't know nobody but my name is always in other people's mouth and I don't know what it is that I'm doing.
leadership that WON'T genuinely LISTEN, creates built up pressure between employees that organically makes this happen. Leaders need to TRULY listen to concerns, not argue with empolyees that people with concerns are wrong, or dumb, or bad.
I divorced a male gossip, only to find a church full of gossips, to flee all my family members who became like the church gossips. I now know no more gossips, and life is now peaceful. Eliminate every gossip from your life if you ever want joy and peace.
Me too. I HATE gossippers and slanderous the worst are bosses who encourage gossiping staff. Glad you ate not one of them I left jobs because of slandering gossiping colleagues.
I love the no gossip policy... no stress in
Life
“He who repeats a matter alienates a friend.”-Prov. 16:28 AS
"Whoever forgives* a transgression seeks love, But the one who keeps harping on a matter separates close friends." Prov 17:9,
It's usually the people who don't like you that gossip about you.
What if they don't know you? What if you never done them anything?
It destroyed my working relationships.
This is how I would handle my company if I had one. 😁 I worked for a toxic law firm and the only reason gossip continued was because the kiss asses were involved in it with management. Horrible law firm.
Dave Ramsey just earned my respect.
I wish my workplace had this policy! The gossip is so overwhelming and they still allow it to happen!
Recently I did this...handing the problem to leadership. All leadership did was call a meeting, allowed me to be spoke over, inforced that being snippy and biting each others heads off is normal among co workers, which I know better and then went onto suggest that I invent things and imagine things.
This was in response to a 29 year old male student (who is married with a 2 year old) saying I am going to come over there and slap you, one of these days I am going to get out of my chair and come over there and slap you so hard. He went onto to say stuff about me to other students in the classroom. We are Radiology Technology students. I am a 48 year old female.
I raised the issue after class to the instructor. And she set a precedent that it is okay! All because I was objecting to quiz and test dates being changed because notorious procrastinators once again had not studied!
Hi Dave, I was the brunt of gossip by my narcopathic, obsessive compulsive and depressive middle brother and narcopathic, obsessive compulsive and depressive middle sister! It drove me bonkers and bananas enough that I eventually went no contact with both of them, let alone my schedule didn't allow much time for them! I was constantly off to music classes and clubs, I've gone no contact with them for real now, it sucks in a way! They're my family, it's the hoping who I thought they were and not getting it that hurts! I don't blame you, congrats! Take care and thanks!
Dave is right. Gossip always comes from the dopes. I too would fire gossipers. They are false witnesses and unfortunately, people actually are such dullards they believe it and perpetuate it, regardless of all that you have done for others. Make them poor for evil behavior.
It's usually people that don't have anything better to do.
Dave Ramsey, Love is a much better attitude than yelling at us. Modeling a caring, loving attitude is so much more helpful than threatening.
Though I like his boldness I agree he did come off a bit harsh at the beginning. Since we are all born into sin gossip is just another human trait along with the rest of our imperfections.
As someone who can’t stand gossip and keep my mouth shut when caught of the middle of it, I wholeheartedly support this.
I shouldn’t have to walk into work hearing about the sheer level of toxicity amongst my peers because people can’t keep their mouth shut. It’s not hard to stay in your lane and not put people down behind their back. How can you trust anyone who has no scruples about badmouthing others to you? Surely they will talk about you in a negative light.
I've had people gossip about my work performance. The problem is that people will talk about you. Not just in the work environment, but the world will. That's fine if people want to talk about me, it just puts a fire under me to become a better, faster employee.
Gossip is a social instrument to regulate the group - has been done for ages.
I hate when the person doesn't go to you about whatever their feeling. Why go tell someone else when you could just be honest with that person. Say hey, I really don't like what you said or, hey I can't help you with that.
The dumbest thing is that grown adults will do this high school crap. I'm 22 and too old for that.
i just lost a job due to workplace gossiping. i couldn't believe the managers & bosses didn't nip it in the bud, rather helped spread it.
I have a friend who gossips bad about a of her friends mistakes. I find it very rude and judgemental. Very very tacky and shameful
A lot of people at work dislike me due to gossip. I still can't explain what I ever did.
I have done this. I have passed the problems of bullying, micromanaging, mocking, gossiping, creating rumors, among others about a coworker, who happens to have 2 responsibilities in the school. One as my coworker and another as a supervisor of a team. Management have spoken to her over and over and nothing else gets done. Not warnings, not threat to get fired, not being suspended, nothing just a quick talk with the headteacher. A few people have come forward complaining about similar situations with her, so it's not just me who has experienced difficulty with this bad coworker/supervisor's behaviour. Still nothing gets done, she is still working there and it's continuing to do to other people the same she did to me and others who has already left.
" Whoever guards his mouth and tongue, keeps his soul from trouble". LOVE IT! If most women, especially blk lived by that rule, the divorce rate just might be a bit lower!
Men gossip also, and bosses!
I would love to work for a boss like this.
Working with gossip is one thing but working with a hard ass and coworkers who will sell you out b/c they’re afraid of the boss is another. I’d rather work navigate the office politics Game of Thrones style. I stay away from gossip
Church gossip is the worst. They don’t work they just ruin reputations. That why I left.
Problem is it is tolerated as normal behavior everywhere including at church. It should not be simply ignored but not TOLERATED.
I wish this guy was a manager where I work. It is nothing but gossip and nothing and I mean absolutely nothing is off limits. And if you complain to management or HR they only pretend to want to help but never take any action and then later you find out that they are joining in on the gossip sessions. There are so many lies and rumors bouncing around the place you never know what to believe. And the people have all known each other for so long it doesn't really do any good to complain. I just keep to myself most of the time at work and that in itself makes me a target.
I wish more leaders were like you!
I just made a video on this! Gossiping is so destructive to your life. When you get rid of it it’s like taking junk food out of your diet! You don’t realize all the additional stress it brings to your life until you stop doing it. I wish the best for all of you!
What if it's your boss that's perpetuating the gossiping? It's terrible!
You better say this message a million times,, I HATE GOSSIP, ITS PATHETIC AND STUPID AND FOOLISH!!!!!!
gossiping people just know one side of coin so obviously gossiping is toxic act..
I pray employers will be relentless in dealing with this evil.
This needs to be adopted in all organizations
I was trying to meet a new friend and I should have took note that right when I met them they were talking about someone else. They have talked about somebody else every single day. I had to let go in that so-called friend because if people are talking about others and don't want to be solution-minded or be helpful to others then soon they will be talking about you. I just can't have that kind of spirit around me. It's better to be positive and supportive of people and productive than to tear people down I just can't be a part of People not do that. And so I was looking up this topic on gossip and I found this and I think I pretty much feel the same
The world would be a better place if corporations adopted a "No gossip policy" and stuck to it.
Also important to make a distinction in 'gossip' and 'genuine criticism'. workers are a part of the process. Every bigger company i have joined has always said change can come from the bottom or the top or anywhere between. we have valuable input as well as complaints and gossip.
Preventing gossip is mainly about having communication and being direct. I think people think gossiping is simply a healthy manifestation of venting, but it is more toxic than that. A coworker is a coworker, not a friend. They can be a friend outside of work, but your relationship must be purely professional inside the walls of your workplace
I hope I have a boss like Dave someday.
Absolutely toxic people always do GOSSIP and rumours as they are unhappy in there life
I agree with you. Can't stand it.
Some Gossiping stems from workers, employees, co-workers, ect..having problems that are above their pay grade and them taking it up the ladder and NOTHING is done about it.. this includes ideas, solutions to a problem that saves money and falls on deaf ears because it doesn’t concern/ affect upper management so they give not a shit! Gossip seems to be a natural outlet to let people vent that can’t get the help they need/ want from co-workers/ bosses... I could be wrong but sure seems like it to me.
This doesn’t apply to truly mean hateful people who have no control over their attitudes and or emotions towards otherwise peaceful individuals.
I agree with Dave also but what’s the solution?
Venting is natural and healthy, at home. Not at work. You're at work. So work. Dave isn't saying to not vent, he's saying to keep that out of the workplace. If you took the problem up the chain of command and nothing happened, then build some social currency in your workplace and try again. Gossip is never okay.
Kenneth See
Social currency?
Doesn’t exist. Even if it did you wouldn’t need it if the place was run properly.
Thank you for your attempt towards a solution.
😊 😊
I love you reading my novel lol! Thanks again and you're welcome! Take care, that's sweet and I'm honored to be a part of your family!
It’s draining and I’m sick of it in the workplace…snickering and yapping on and on. It’s draining.
Hi Dave, could you please come to South Shore Hospital in South Weymouth Massachusetts and please talk to the entire Operating Room staff. The gossip here is beyond belief. If it was acid it would dissolve metal in minutes.
When your prime was in highschool and you cant let it go....might as well rock a mullet and Jean vest
Where I work, on the other hand, is GOSSIP CITY! I work at a supermarket, and you hear everything about everyone at one point or another! If someone came in and fired every single gossip like he suggests, there wouldn't be anyone left to shut the lights off and lock the doors and arm the security systems! To some point gossiping is tradition in any job where you work with the public, I am sure there's some nasty things circulating, and it shouldn't, but it does happen in the company and the workplace, it had for decades. The different things that circulate around the old water cooler and so on.
Thank you sir. I have time fOr no gossip nor negative attitude peOple
What is the dividing line between staying safe by keeping immediate family members informed on your day to day experiences and only gossip is not always easily discerned. Like when gossiping about someone who according to someone is only lazy while not willing to work too.
Watching again, I watch it from my window every day. I refuse to participate in it.
Many people love to gossip and break many good relationships.
Well spoken.
They say talk is cheap.But the consequences can be expensive.
🌎🙏🙏🙏 love this video. Thank you. Stay away from negative gossip.
What if leadership has a deaf ear to the problem(s)?
Flashynista
Time to find leadership(new employer), cause they're not leading!
Truth is a form of gossip, peace out
Sometimes I’m guilty... but I speak the truth
NOW THAT IS A LEADER!!!
I got a text from a church lady who said she heard my husband had covid. I told her he didn’t!! His co workers were sick but no one had covid. She wouldn’t tell me who mentioned this lie to her. I’m curious who told it myself.
If she couldn't tell you the source, then that means she invented the lie in order to meddle. She's bored and has no life.
Usually women are the biggest culprits of this especially in the workplace
Totally agree with you 😊
What if it's the boss who gossips?
I wonder how
does someone deal with an employer not enforcing policy. For example I notice many new employees where I work are lazy and don't seem to care about their jobs or learning anything about their duties (through the course of monthly evaluations there is no improvement). We have a high number of call offs. Where I'm at new employees are suppose to be on probationary status (6 months) and can't have more then 3 call offs (all of them have had more then 6 in the past 4 months) and previously if you agreed to cover an extra shift and then call off on the day you were suppose to work the shift you were subject to suspension (every week someone does this) . I can only do write ups and documentations but nothing when it comes to attendance. Only upper management has the ability to suspend or fire employees for this and it doesn't happen often (rules being enforced). I notice when the bad employees are able to run a muck eventually it creates a toxic environment where even the better workers start to become lazy/unmotivated. How is one suppose to deal with that? I suppose I could approach the owners but I'm afraid of the can of worms I could be opening up If I do. Lol
I guess we know that Dave hates gossip