You gotta take action. That's the bottom line. It's a balance, if you're just bumbling about not examining your action, you'll make a lot of avoidable mistakes, but knowledge is useless. Knowledge in action is gold. Thanks for this perspective.
Tell that to Warren Buffet who spends 99% of his time learning and less than 1% executing. If self-improvement goes, let’s take singular phrases to embody success haha
@@niklas5948 I think his point is to not surround your life around self-improvement rather than pursuing and living life. Like he does. Basically, do less consuming and more doing. He is not the same as his viewers. He is doing less consuming and doing more. Aka focusing on his TH-cam career, outside work, experiencing life and help advising people. Self help is useless if thats all you surround your improvement by. Find a passion outside self help so you can actually implement it to be beneficial. Yes self help can be useful, however if all your focus is on self-help, it won’t get you to the same place as the people you may look up to. That’s why he brought up successful people. Focus on doing. (Learning about topics you are passionate about, going outside, exploring, learning new hobbies) rather than consuming self help n being isolated
The best self improvement method is to experience and learn from your mistakes and bad choices rather than let them dictate your life and turn you into a snowflake
@@AlexiaHDIntuition I’ve sort of gained a few ideals, such as to avoid jealousy, inferior complex and validation (has been my biggest struggle coming back to school) but having ideals while being in a conversation has been hellish because I have million different things in my mind obstructing with being simply present. For something that cures social anxiety it creates more. Self improvement is only valuable when you actually help yourself.
@@medonja9361 I at first read it as cockblock but never actually sucking. I'm a recovering porn addict bro, I'm still feeling the side effects a year later 😭
Wouldn't get enough clicks. Not attacking him or anything, I'm with him completely here, the title holds and it's not a false title and it delivers what it says. But youtubers also need to make some money. Making the title more attractive to clicking on isn't being a bad human, it's smart advertising, until it becomes false advertising, or as we on youtube call it, clickbait.
I notice that since a months ago, I only prefer to pursue my legitimit goals that I want and that's it!. I have live in a poor family, I only want a better house, better food, better clothes, to certain degree, and stay "stock" in there until I feel the need to improve something else, that's how I feel moving free and with confort in life, if sometimes I need to be more rigid some times on certain things, then I do it, follow your gut, sometimes I complain I let the place to feel like shit some times. In my opinion support the values, ideas, paradigms, that makes you feel better, that makes you feel that you have a normal bearable life, that makes you feel satisfied 80% of the time.
@@avananana No, the title is false , it clearly makes us think the problem is self improvment. I feel I wasted my time because there was nothing new. I already watched another youtuber talking exacly the same thing but with the appropriate title. I clicked curious to see why he is saying self improvement is a problem and if the title was right, I would not had wasted my time. "...need to make some money". It does not justify misleading titles and you talk as if he doesn't make much money. He probably makes more than us all combined in this discussion. But we have this mentality nowadays that to sell something using such tricks is "smart" instead of unethical.
Definitely agree with that one. It would give a bit more context as what he is trying to say. Throughout the beginning of the video, I thought he was spouting nonsense until I got to the end, but it was completely different from the title of the video.
Does self care count as being stuck in the comfort zone? I have anxiety and trying my best to find things to relax me but now I feel guilty for feeling I should be doing more.
Perhaps I’m looking at it the wrong way but I don’t fully agree with this. I concur with the general sentiment but I think it’s ok if you do what others do as long as it’s still authentic to yourself. Everyone’s just a blank canvas that gets painted on by numerous entities be it your parents friends society whatever. I think its about evaluating what they’ve painted and altering things where u see fit. Like of course most of my opinions have been held by others before me especially if it’s not regarding something personal to me but it’s about making sure the point is evaluated not just blindly believed. Of course my life will be similar to everyone else’s somehow but as long as it’s what I want to do and feel I should do. Of course someone else on Earth will share even my most esoteric passion and that’s ok as long as it’s what I truly want to do
I hate the fact that "self improvement" has become a cult of people that endorse toxic positivity. Working on yourself is amazing. Pretending that everything is possible is not!
pretending that everything is fun and games 24/7 wouldve been a greater way to describe it (my opinion) otherwise I totally agree with you... but literally everything is possible tho
We spend far too long sharpening our swords rather than actually slashing and hacking. We're almost fooling ourselves into thinking that we're growing but we're just stuck in our comfort zones.
For sure. I've built a wealth of knowledge from listening to many great people online that will surely come in handy at some point, but as of right now only a tiny portion of it is getting put to use.
@@HolyCodzta The main goal should be implementation instead of rampant consumption. If productivity is measured based on output, then we'll be doing a lot more with our lives.
@Takezo Miyamoto but he is right. Marcus Aurelius was right. The stoic philosophers all understood that out time on this earth is limited and you got to live life at the fullest
It’s also that if you’re always obsessed with self improvement to the end of time then you’ll never feel grateful about reaching your goals. You’ll simply have disappointment in yourself over not having yet reached a goal even further than the one you originally set. As a middle schooler who couldn’t even do a single push-up, I would’ve dreamed of having “average” chest strength, but now that I have average chest strength I feel just as miserable compared to muscular people. It’s the hedonic treadmill.
whenever I have an urge to post a comment on youtube or reddit, I just tell myself, "shut up, nobody cares about what you have to say." and so i'll delete whatever comment I'm about to make. Because that's the truth, as a man, if you are not successful, nobody cares about what you have to say.
@David Crespo he doesn't need to, because if you didn't notice. He found success by realising what he needs to feel and be; that's what all the people should do in their lives man. And as a plus, he's kind enough to share it with us, so reanalyse his comment, cause it might help you too... (I'm a psychologist btw so I know)
Let it out man! Don’t hide your light under a bushel basket. I like to read comments; some i agree with, some i dont but i enjoy hearing different and unique perspectives. Take care!
@@hussainbohra7235 disagree. You have to have your own goals that you wanted because... And your reasons. If you build your goals based on somebodys success, that you dont have you are not improving yourself, you only competing with somebody.
Obsessing over self-improvement makes me think of the phrase: “stay ready, so you never have to get ready”. However, when you’re obsessed with “staying ready” rather than just executing the very thing you’ve spent so much time preparing for, you miss out on opportunities.
Mi fi tell my girl, I swear, jah kno star... The mount of times that I do that too my self, I worry about other people approval especially family and not worry about what's going to get me to the that place "I have to be", yuh zimi, focusing on how I'm not there and journey it going to take now due to each set back, so I miss out because I have on track mind and fret about the possible misfortune and not actual being flexible or adaptable.
I know, right? This video somehow made me at peace! I have been thinking about starting some workout routine for a whole year now, and I'm only now realizing I make like 4 km of fast walking/running with a bag/or like 20km with a bike per day just by living that busy student life. I am on my feet educating and socializing myself from 7 to 7. F*** that evening workout, they exist to help you not hount you. Being healthy/fit is the goal here afterall!
@@anasubic3090 Depends on your goal. If you want to make yourself stronger physically, you probably need a weight workout. If you just want to be fit without being overweight, having a busy life like that is most likely enough
@@LEONSKENNEDY91 yeah, that's right. i keep weights in plan, but as long as physics takes 7-9 hours of pure lessons, not even counting commuting and studying alone, i will have to compromise.. so it was comforting for me to be reminded that achieving the priorities is an actual plan here ((and being fit and not overweight, as you said it, luckily comes in the package naturally))
Yes, a lot of contradictions and it can get quite confusing listening to everyone’s belief system. I think everyone should just do what works best for them. Trust yourself and just go for it, whatever it is. If you want to “self improve” then do it! We just have to learn to have a balance and not obsess
What made me realize this was seeing a picture of Mark Zuckerberg in his early 20s working to develop Facebook on his laptop. He was surrounded by various unhealthy drinks while giving the camera man the finger. Made me realize that “these people” got to where we all want to go by focusing in on the thing that was actually going to get them there; not doing some crazy workout routine or having an insane diet.
Nah it's very high IQ, smart people are the first ones most of the time, working hard is not enough to be a multimillionaire or being one of the best in a specific field
IMO, self improvement means growing as a human both mentally and emotionally. It's about learning to deal with the ups and downs of life and being content with your own life. It's about seeing where you're lacking, finding solutions to it, making those changes, and building good habits. You don't need to be the best at everything. It could be as simple as drinking more water and making it a part of your daily routine. You have to accept the problem, find a solution, and just start. Be persistent and watch the results over time.
Feel like Matt D’Avella and Better Ideas are taking a turn in their videos, they are more nuanced about self-improvement, and I think that is the way they can really help people start doing thing, and stop wasting their time on TH-cam watching self-improvement videos.
Obsessing over self improvement is the same as a musician thinking that an expensive instrument will somehow magically make them sound good Just like the sound is in the hands, your life is in yours Don't sweat the small stuff, just be yourself We're all winging it here, nobody is perfect, nobody has to nor should be
Last week I ran my first 5k without stopping and all the time I could hear the voice in my head saying that I can do it. Forwago, thank you so much for everything!!
Houlmnt I noticed that ages ago! On the available emojis on keyboards is the blue spiral too, I’ve always wondered why that’s there...no other colour, just blue. It’s not representing tornados or whirlpools or anything. The pink heart has 2 triple heart logos too, similar to the girl pedo heart inside a heart thing. No other colour. 😷🤔☠️
"Knowledge is useless without the wisdom to act upon it." Just because you read a self-improvement book doesn't immediately make you a better person. You need to get out there and figure stuff out on your own and EMBODY the good things that you've read.
Literally me. I know how to fix my shit, but don't want to take actions on it. I know I should seek therapy, but that would make me have to make changes and improvements. It's hard to force yourself into doing things when you feel like it's good enough....even when it shouldn't be
Hm...you’re right but isn’t wisdom about have years of experience or knowledge? If that’s correct that sounds contradictory. Lmaoo I’m just saying 🤷🏽♀️ You’re still right I actually got a new book which is Becoming Bulletproof by Evy Poumpouras a former secret service agent I am not just using for self improvement, but apply what I know to life. Because when you’re in a situation where someone is disrespecting you wait until there’s no one left, but you, and the other person. I learned that from the interview by Lisa Bilyeu who’s was interviewing Evy. Love that interview much respect.
I don't know man, by self-improving I feel my confidence levels rise. reading books and applying what I learned really does help me in a lot of situations. ever since I started staying home more and looking into my future I noticed one thing about my friends. All we used to do is go out hang out smoke a joint or a few drinks and talk about how we will be rich and how we will develop good habits. I started doing my own improvement which really made me realise my friends still do what they did for the past few years. their highlighted story wouldn't be of how they succeeded or what they achieved. it is more like how fucked up they got on whatever and be proud and say how I'm missing out. Their excuse is that gotta live while we are young. I want to be flying on Jet Skis and travelling the world while I'm young not getting fucked up in my dodgy town for the next 5 years. Thank you to whoever read this lol. was meant to be a small comment but got carried away.
@@idkicy2690 well, i quit drinking and smoking for months now, (I'm 21) which was part of the mission. Basically quit all my bad habits and some I'm still working on. i dropped out of college, was doing computer science for 3 years that was putting me in a bad place so i made a decision to move past that. Iv basically learned a lot about myself because when you cut the shit and get real work done that's when life gets really challenging. Failure after failure after failure but i pushed past it all and now i look back thinking.... i put on 10kg of muscle, I do novice Boxing. Got a nice car, Sometimes i feel like an alien within a crowd of small minded people, but when i meet someone successful or with same mindset it all makes sense. If you hang with 5 millionaires you will be the 6th, If you hang with 5 bums you will be the 6th. to make it short iv become a tank haha. i work full time i train everyday, nobody understands why I'm doing all this but iv to be a millionaire by 25 so..... in this world the only support is me myself and I. The biggest thing that i realised is, Close ones don't like to see you win because yous started at the same level, but once you start going up and they stay down, they cant bare and hate when you win, but they don't show it in obvious ways... Strangers in fact love see people winning.
@@danielprosvirnevs4818 I’m happy for you, it really takes a man to quit bad habits and start improving and actually take it serious, I know we jus strangers but I support you bro, keep improving n stay strong 🙌
@@idkicy2690 My brother, i appreciate it 100% why not use this post to throw out ur achievements, it would be great to know how your progressing through hardships and nailing success. We are strangers but we got similar mindsets . Keep up the hard work g
@@danielprosvirnevs4818 Thank you for your comments. They are very motivational, and thank you for warning me about close ones starting to be jealous of you. I have just started my self-improvement journey and I will try to remember your words. I would love to keep in touch with you here, to share some future thoughts and accomplishments. Keep it up, brother! I'm proud of you!
I agree with what you’re saying - to an extent. The whole point of self improvement is so we can apply what we’re learning to our everyday life and if we’re not then it’s a waste of your time and energy. I’ve read countless books and it helped me quit smoking, create better habits, manage my emotions and become a better version of myself and for my partner BUT AGAIN, it’s because I was applying everything I was learning to better my relationships and myself. I think individuals who think self improvement is a waste of time is because they’re not putting it into action. And it’s like losing weight, it’s not an overnight success. Self improvement takes time and effort! It took me about a year to unravel some trauma and face it, which ultimately led me to where I am now. Things take time!!
That’s bullshit. Try going into a university library without a student ID. The man with a stick will be just around the corner. Now tell me more about this power you speak of,
This video popped up for me during a time when I wasn't feeling completely secure in my own progress, worrying about what I should have achieved already, and what I should achieve by this age etc. Sometimes getting so caught up in those details that I would get overwhelmed and just freeze which is counter-productive. It's amazing how much you can self-improve 'in the background' when you're not actually focussed and self-improvement. This video was really helpful, thank you!
This should be the channel front page video, this is the big takeaway for sure. You find yourself in these places because you get knocked down or you're down on your luck, but no amount of sharpening the sword really fixes anything on its own as obvious as that seems like it is. Not being able to gain new skills just by studying up is something I had to learn the hard way in my college years, and it basically applies the same here but with being the version of you you want to be. That intangible confidence and wisdom doesn't just turn on eventually, you just have to actually be gripped by what you actually do in whatever you're after and start powering through being the not-so-desirable version of yourself you are now in the moment, because beyond just realizing the dreams of being better you _do_ still _right now_ really care about and want the stuff you need to do.
So one of the best self improvement advice I've ever heard is ironically about stop focusing on self improvement, but rather mastering what I like doing. Thanks man.
I definitely sabotage myself with my obsession with self-improvement sometimes. I often forget that most of my improvements will come from getting out there doing stuff. This is a really important topic, and a great video!
DUDE, I was stuck in this headspace for so long, reading books, and never actually applying the knowledge I was absorbing into the actions in my life. Once I was able to put more effort and time into actually DOING the work instead of learning how to during both my 9-5 and my passions on the side, did I start to improve and find more enjoyment out of them!!!
Consuming self improvement is not a bad thing, because we all need somewhere to start and learn from not just ourselves but others. Its consuming and not implementing which will keep you in an endless loop
Hadhoudtn you’re both right. Action is necessary to make any change in any direction but It’s not only about action, it has to be coupled With actually knowing what direction you want to be in life. It’d be pointless both reading books and putting into practice ideas about socializing if I’m already a very social person. So he’s right, aimless self improvement (including the ideas you put into action, practice and perfect) is kinda pointless if it’s not taking you to where you want to be in life. There’s a famous quote that says, “growth for the sake of growth is the ideology of a cancer cell.” I think it applies. Imo, at some point Action without direction, is as useless at not taking any action at all.
This video came at a perfect time in my life. I've been feeling depressed every single day for months, and I do believe that the main reason is thinking I should be a perfect man in every single are of my life that has all answers. It just isn't healthy.
@@stansvitsa1 Sincerely, I am at my best in quite a while. I feel good almost all the time, I have a nice job, a great relationship with my loved ones and made a lot of progress at the gym. Never give up, guys. Find your own path and always be grateful!
i really like the dull sword analogy. you can spend all your time inside your own head thinking about how you can be better at something but by doing so, you're forgetting that a lot of this is what you'd be doing anyway just by going out there and getting experience. some theory can make a big difference, for sure! but while you eventually get diminishing returns from theory, you can never have too much experience. sick video, man! :)
I agree with you about experience. I was thinking about all the things that I just went out and did in my twenties and what great things came from that action of going in and doing them. I also thought about the growth in my career when I made organic gut choices without wondering about it first.
Dawg I was just telling my cousin something like this last night lol. I felt like I've been spending too much time learning how to improve and haven't been applying shit in life
None of these "success's" will avail you when you die, what have you prepared for in the next life This life compared to the hereafter is like a water droplet in the Pacific Ocean
"There is no use continually brooding over who you really are. For, just as in narcissistic self-observation the preoccupation with the effect nullifies the effect, the self of the self-explorer is reduced as his need to explore increases. Excessive psychoanalysis weakens the psyche. A person does not find his self by turning his inner life upside down, he creates it by putting something on his feet in this world. A self that only sees itself ends up destroying itself"
@@Griot-Guild from a book called "Kleine Philosophie für Nichtphilosophen" by Friedhelm Moser. I read the spanish version, though ("Pequeña Filosofía para no filósofos") and I translated that part with google translator, so it might have some mistakes, I don't know.
The biggest problem with people who think they need self improvement is that they feel they have to put everything else on hold until they're satisfied. People even set aside developing relationships or going out to find one, because they don't think they're ready. You can go throughout your entire life trying to improve things but never feel satisfied. It can be pretty heartbreaking to think about all those missed opportunities.
This is why every time I watch one of these videos, I pedal my stationary bike at the same time. I'm in bad shape, and watching the videos gives me ideas, but ideas are nothing without action... so I make certain to be doing something and not just watching.
THANK YOU for articulating this so perfectly. Until recently, I was obsessed with consuming content, watching youtube, reading, doing everything I could do to educate myself. Filling my cup with knowledge until it overflows, every day, for hours on end. But I wasn't making progress and it was super frustrating. It wasn't until I decided to: - set goals for myself - watch only relevant content that would help me reach those goals and - started PRACTICING what I had learned that I started to see some progress. This is so important! There is this perception that knowledge is power, and to some degree that is true. But real knowledge comes from cementing what you learn with practice.
This is the truth. Ran into this issue and am currently on stress leave from work because of it. Have been doing great in life but was never happy or satisfied. Put myself down if I wasn't 100% on point. Would get angry when I didn't have time to read. Was chasing the next "improvement". Feeling better now and this video is great to hear.
Lately I've been on a self improvement binge, which is the first time I've done so in years, I got curious about this video wondering "Is it really that bad?", and then you talked about people's attitudes towards self improvement being a bandaid to try and fix life's problems, and I'm there thinking "Oh ya, I relate, which is why I gave it up before". lol Self improvement without expectations is probably the best kind, but some people won't do that because people love having expectations. Also, I relate so heavily on the self improvement for being social, due to my previous self improvement obsession, but sadly, while it did give me success in being around people, and I even had wonderful relationships and stuff like that, all my social interactions feel very artificial and disconnected and all doomed to fail, because I have a foundation that's more on script than genuine human heart.
When I was young, I heard that an admirer said to a pianist, “I’d give my life to play like this.” The pianist replied, “I did.” Everyone that runs had to learn to walk. They fell down and their parents didn’t berate them. The parents encouraged the babies...and what do you know? They not only learned to run, most kids learn to ride bicycles & learn to drive. We start at the beginning and practice. If you keep up, you’ll be good at it. Reading does go hand in hand with learning! Sometimes, it saves a bunch of falling down!!!
Sometimes the words don't make sense without the practice and experience and I think anybody whos "cerebrallized" socialising knows this horrible feeling.
So when I started my personal development journey, I found myself reading a lot of books, and being really excited about all the different ways I was going to improve my life and make a lot of money. I would take all this information and share this with my wife with a lot of excitement. Finally one day she came to me and asked me why I was learning all this when I was in applying any of it.I took that to heart and applied everything I learned from then on! I became an action taker!!! It changed my life!
"conditional happiness ." 😉 I gave up alcohol 8 years ago. I realized that achieving happiness is not the daily / hourly destination that I desire - today I focus on being content throughout the day. So far I'm learning to be content and uncomfortable situations where I was discontent. Hence my situational happiness /(conditional happiness) is being addressed.
I"ll add a slightly different perspective on the issue: you better balance your *theory* vs *practice* ratio. Self improvement is awesome and important, but if all you do is absorbing theory and not taking enough *action* , it becomes couter productive. In my view, *theory* and *practice* are both integrated parts of the whole, "Self Improvement." each one reinforces and informs the other. What you call "living life" for me i call: the practical part of self improvement; deliberate action. I wouldn't want to simply "live life" but rather take action in life that deliberatly improves myself. For example, i see going out and socializing as a technic for self imlrovement.
I'm having one of those nights where I felt so insecure about my image and my fashion sense that I told my friends I didn't want to go out for drinks with them. It's like I was meant to see your video. I never feel completely happy with myself and I'm constantly "improving" or "re-inve nting" myself without actually trying to be happy with who I truly am. Social media fucks with my head so much: buy the latest clothing, do your make up this way and you'll look better, your hair, your diet, your productivity and your career prospects... It's total overkill. Thank you for this.
I did Tony Robbins’ Personal Power II about 8 years ago, got myself out of a rut, and have never looked back. Going out into the world and doing things and changing the approach if those things don’t work is definitely the way to go vs analysis paralysis.
Brother you need to grieve unresolved trauma that goes into the subconcious is the cause of this, think during your day what causes you to get triggered
You're right that self-improvement is a means to an end, and that it's not a goal in of itself. However, I'm starting to wonder if it's a genuine character trait. Reflection and learning and improving is all I know how to do (along with daydreaming of course). I make mistakes. I ponder over them. And I change accordingly. It is somewhat of an obsession as I spend countless hours watching and reading about philosophy and psychology and grand ideas. Even if most of it simply my interests and hobbies and intended for self-improvement, I have noticed a difference (however small) in my day-to-day. Most importantly, it's helping me to find direction. I can't say if all this seemingly "wasted time" will work out in the end, but my relationships with those around me are improving. My writing is improving. And I'm becoming somewhat of a counselor for those around me. It's hard to find that balance, but after several anxious years of "what the hell am I doing with my life," I've learned to trust my gut and believe in delayed gratification. I trust that it will all work out in the end, and that the countless of hours I spent watching Matt D and Academy of Ideas would have all been worth it.
Wow, this aged poorly. I was definitely a victim of the "self-help brainwashing" Alice Cappelle mentioned in her video that recently blew up. I could go on and on about how I'm different now than when I made this original comment. But that's cringey. There's too much to say in a short youtube comment that wouldn't thoroughly address the problem. All I can say is this: you'll figure it out. Everyone's path is different, and so, the advice people need to hear is also different. Your "purpose in life" is going to keep shifting, and that's okay. It'll stabilize with life experience and confidence. Self-improvement is inevitable. No need to force it and overthink it. You'll figure it out.
tbh, with everything in life i just have to remember myself that doing something to the extremes is never a good idea, doesnt matter what it is. and yes this goes for self improvement too and most of what people online seem to tell you is kind of pointless because it doesnt even resonante with you or fit you. its just all about balance and doing things that feel right in a current moment and not what other people tell you you should do. this weekend was a nice example. i could have watched hours of self improvement videos or books and telling me how i should go to the gym or that i need to stop doing this or i need to do this or what ever... i could of... but i did not. you know what i did instead? i woke up and saw a glassbowl in my kitchen and randomly got the idea i could build a little terrarium in there and then i went out to the forest to collect stuff like moss and whatever and came back home to build it and then i had a little nap and after that was cooking something nice while having some music on and on the evening i was going out with a friend dancing in our fav. club. and i had a nice day... thats self improvement to me. to improve in having as many nice days as you can. and i dont need any videos for that either. its all balance. i am a human and not a robot, and not a productive working drone either. the only thing that matters really is to have fun and enjoy yourself, have some friends to share, and do or learn something new every day (and it doesnt have to be obsessive) just... something... small steps for accomplishment. maybe learn a new cooking recipe tomorrow or a new way to fold your clothes so you can fit your stuff into smaller storage... just something as new input to keep your brain moving. its not about becoming the best version of yourself or becoming a millionaire or becoming that successful guy at the gym... its just getting peace with yourself, enjoying yourself in the moment and on top... try to get a little bit better every day.
What i dont really like hearing is "go out there and socialize". Man how, with who? If you are unable to socialize in your work, in school or whereever you go for daily routine, then you lack social skills and you certainly cant just go out there, sit on a bar order a coffee etc then expect to socialize. You were supposed to learn those social skills by yourself at teenage years and if you didnt or better to say couldn't, the only option for you is to get so good at things. Being busy devoting yourself to things can led you to socialize, nothin else.
Its quarantine now so yeah theres not much of an option, but without covid you can go to any bar and talk to anyone. Everyday you go to the store you can interact with the people around you. Doesnt mean being annoying, but interact with the world.
I don’t know why author didn’t manage to learn to communicate with people alone, but I did it. I studied a lot of psychology, worked for free with psychologists, thought a lot about my thinking, and eventually I started to socialize better by correcting childhood traumas and dogmas. It is paradoxical that when I was surrounded by people, I did not know how to communicate with them as I learned being alone, engaged in the development of professional skills.
I still socialize, all that “mask and social distancing” was made for us not to socialize and talk, I do it anyways, fuck whatever everyone else says. If you peak my interest I’m gonna strike up a conversation with you.
If you go deep enough on their so called "self improvement". One of the best psychologists/youtuber jordan peterson brings up the topic of persona in one of his lectures. Persona is basically a psychoanalytic term that means a mask that you put out and its how people see you. Simply saying that we resent it too much that we see the persona as being fake whilst in fact its not. He says the so called mask is a gateway or a manifestation of our thoughts into actions and words. Its basically a window path into our true selves and the fact that we have under developed personas prevents us from socializing well because we almost immediately expect it to be easy. Everything in life either takes effort to do or atleast to master. And we should look into developing our personas as it is very important because evidently not everyone will be happy seeing you naked the first time you meet. You have to give it time.
i feel like i am unable to “go out and socialize” because what i am concerned with what people will think. I know complimenting someone on their laugh or makeup might make them feel nice, but i am afraid they will take it weird and and not like me, or that it was strange of me to do that to them because they are a stranger. i dislike that i don’t know everyone’s personality, it makes it feel risky to strike up a conversation (not that i know how to do that anyway), because of the reaction the person might have. awkward social situation are the worst.
I got into this self improvement thing in february last year. In october I was at the hospital psychiatric emergency at 4 A.M. Well, I had untreated mental health issues, sure, but at the beginning I was only getting better in life (I was 20). Excellent grades, reading a book per week, "sharpening my knife" and it is very very difficult to realise the problem with it when we're doing great. I got so obsessed with being perfect, amazing, totally not average, outstanding that I forgot myself and everything around me. what I really enjoyed doing, who I really enjoyed talking to. when I noticed it, it was kinda too late to stop the damage it already did to my mental health. I got to therapy, took meds and everything, but to this day I'm afraid of doing certain things and even feel bad sometimes when getting entertainment because of the mentality that I could be improving myself, this isn't right at all.
I feel you, I always felt smth was both right and wrong while reading self-dev, I stopped now and know enough, let's try to forget about all this and enjoy an authentic life
self improvement is like a drug, and you are one of it's many sad victims, it leads to elitism and perfectionism when taken to extremes which fucks your mental health
Dude you are an INSPIRATION!!! I lost my job due to the pandemic. Since then, I've started a TH-cam Channel on Personal Development...and it is GROWING!!! Thanks for all of your content, and to everyone else...NEVER GIVE UP!!
That's really good. I'll soon start my channel too, but the only camera I got is my phone camera and my earphone microphone. Let's see what I can do with it
i quit watching motivational videos when they started making me feel guilty about not workin on my goals "24/7" working hours upon hours happens when youre in a muse and ideas are flowing. but if youre unsure of your future plans then motivational content wont guide u
Exactly, if you’re not sure of your future plans and goals, self improvement is practically useless. The same thing happened to me, I spent a lot of time focusing on self improvement and I didn’t even know what I was doing it for. Eventually I decided to stop so I could just figure out what I want.
I think it's important to emphasize that through knowledge from books or gurus on self-improvement we learn aspects of ourselves that are not helping us. From there, those bits and pieces of information can make a big change in our lives. It isn't so bad to read and read, because at one point in our lives, the knowledge we gained can help us...Though it also right that we can't really expect to change our lives drastically by just reading and not applying what we learned.
This channel is really amazing and has truly inspired me to work harder and be more disciplined. Now I'm a first-year medical student and documenting my journey. Your feedback will be greatly appreciated on my first Vlog. th-cam.com/video/qkZp3rytPMY/w-d-xo.html
I don’t care how many flaws I have anymore, I have to start living and doing stuff because I can’t wait until I’ve already grown to start living. I want to start living now. This may be as good as it gets. I’ve been counting on myself changing but I haven’t, and meanwhile feeling isolated and like I’m not starting anything. I am so tired of analyzing everything I do. How are some people just good people? Why am I an ass, why did I do that to myself and others?
All you want is to level up in life, living the right way takes mental and spiritual hard work, can be you stoic? Can you do it? The seven spiritual laws to success by Deepak Chopra ❤ @kerbsidetube.CommunityTV.
actually spending a lot of time reading books on this topic made me able to step out of my comfort zone time and time again (even though it always is a small step at a time) despite my terrible anxiety.. which was not something I would ever expect...
I stopped researching self-improvement when I started learning about philosophy. The self-improvement "gurus" started to get on my nerves. Now I feel I'm much less stressed about everything, and I just go with the flow - but I take action (even if I'm anxious about it) for the things that I know I need to get done. Then I just try to enjoy the little things and recognise when I'm actually enjoying myself when it comes to everything else.
This channel is amazing and has truly inspired me to work harder and be more disciplined. Now I'm a first-year medical student and documenting my journey. Your feedback will be greatly appreciated on my first Vlog. th-cam.com/video/qkZp3rytPMY/w-d-xo.html
Hey man, late reply but worth a shot... What kinda philosophies would you recommend for someone in the same boat as this comment? Things like stoicism or optimistic nihilism? Or anything else?
Here's a thought I'd like to share, a couple of years ago when I first picked up self-help books like "The Happiness Trap" & "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F***", I felt very inspired reading them and I was able to effectively remember and apply the techniques and concepts that I read in these books. At the moment, after reading god knows how many "self-help" books, I feel like I got desensitized and I no longer feel inspired. There's a noise of bad (and 'good') advice that I received from these books that I'm overwhelmed by, and affects my decision-making. I can definitely relate to the thought of "I'm like an alien trying to learn how to interact with humans". Reading these socializing books have helped me a bit (like maybe 10%) but have also made me even more inside my own head when I interact with people. I don't remember it being this tedious to interact with people when I was in middle school, and I didn't read 300 social skills books back then. Sometimes we adult too hard, we over-engineer simple things, when we're supposed to take a step back and realize life isn't meant to be this complicated.
All you want is to level up in life, living the right way takes mental and spiritual hard work, can be you stoic? Can you do it? The seven spiritual laws to success by Deepak Chopra ❤ @kerbsidetube.CommunityTV.
bro this is honestly how i feel. I feel like everyday something is in my head telling me to have my whole life be sorounded with things to help me self improve and its getting yo a point where I think im more mature then everyone around me even though im not going out and actually getting expierience. But at the same time I feel like im running out of time if I just focus on what normal kids my age are focusing on which is school but I dont wanna persue school, I wanna work from home and make money wherever I go. I hope this feeling around me can come to an end and slow down because I feel like im going to fast to the point where I cant control my speed. I need some guidence, something to hold onto because I feel like im alone in this thinking space.
First, get yourself Balanced, then Neutralize ypurself and later on, Equilibrise yourself. Humans NEED and MUST have Equilibrium, that is not the same to Balance or Neutralising something. Philosophy is everything, people have forgot to thing about what they are doing, you are going to fast, stop yourself, think what you are doing. And have self imporvement, but at the same Time have some time to Entertain yourself. You cant live without that. It´s so funny, Humans want to Escape the Equilibrium, but at the same Time they crave it so they can have Order in their life.
@Better Ideas and everyone else: This is a long comment but please take your time to read it. Hopefully it will open your eyes to a new aspect of your life. What you discuss here is the problem with the personality culture that has evolved since the beginning of the last century. In western culture, we idolize the individual, and especially individuals who are very open and charismatic. For many people, this new culture suits them, but for just as many it does not. There are people who will always be more happy sitting at home "sharpening their swords" as you describe it, and who will never be at peace with themselves regardless of how good they get at "fighting the monsters outside". This is the problem with the personality culture that has evolved, as it sets an ideal that is only applicable to a percentage of the population. In the past, the character culture was the predominant one, in which traits such as honor, honesty, perserverence and empathy was in focus. Becoming the "best" was not the goal, but instead people were encouraged to become as good a person as each individual had the capacity for. This culture is a better fit for most people, and it does not require any self help. For instance, everyone knows how to be honest or how to show perseverence. In personality culture on the other hand, where traits such as charisma, well-spokenness and risk taking are prevalent, there are inumerable self-help books and media, becuase it is not obvious how to be, for instance, charismatic. For those who struggle with self-help, the best advise is to abandon it completely. Reflect on yourself and your personality, your goals and dreams, who you are, and you will find that you know exactly what makes you feel like you are becoming a better person. Quite possibly, you will find that being more like the "popular guy" is not the answer, but that being a loyal and loving partner, a great parent, a reliable colleague and someone your parents can be proud of, is what brings peace and a feeling of personal improvement to yourself. It will be difficult to cast off the yoke of the personality-idolizing culture that we have been brought up in, but everyone can achieve it.
Well said. I just want to be somebody in life and have my parents to be proud of me. I'm a lazy fat ass right now but I wanna improve. My mum and dad have invested very heavily in me and I want to re pay them back. That's all.i want man.
I like the point about doing more than just talking about what you're doing or reading self help books instead of pairing that with practice. I remember one of your older vids about achieving something without telling people about it, pursuing this can be hard but can instill the habit of developing skills properly. That's one of the things I'm trying to stay away from and why I end each video by saying 'stay practical'
Practical learning is very important, some people learn best by reading, listening, etc. but joining your learning with experience is what can really develop people's skills/knowledge
All you want is to level up in life, living the right way takes mental and spiritual hard work, can be you stoic? Can you do it? The seven spiritual laws to success by Deepak Chopra ❤ @kerbsidetube.CommunityTV.
The reason that people don’t “improve” while consuming self improvement content is when they don’t apply their knowledge. Instead of applying a video to become more social, they just watch another video. That’s when self improvement becomes counterproductive.
I like the little jokes sprinkled in with the advice. It makes your videos stand out from other self improvement youtubers. And it makes your videos fun and inspiring to watch. 😁
I heard this in the right moment. Even when I try to "improve" myself I still feel empty. I start to asking me what is wrong with me... But now I understand it.
Take a shot every time I say "self improvement"
Love your work Joey srsly was watching your overstimulation video didn't expect this
I’m already drunk
You gotta take action. That's the bottom line. It's a balance, if you're just bumbling about not examining your action, you'll make a lot of avoidable mistakes, but knowledge is useless. Knowledge in action is gold.
Thanks for this perspective.
I would have loved to hear you say “draygen” more than once :)
Now, thats a better idea.
Spend 20 percent of your time learning and 80 percent practicing what you learn. That's the way to go.
Tell that to Warren Buffet who spends 99% of his time learning and less than 1% executing.
If self-improvement goes, let’s take singular phrases to embody success haha
@@PA-eo7fs Oh yeah, all his investments are made automatically by a robot 🤦🏿♂️🤦🏿♂️🤦🏿♂️🤦🏿♂️
@Didac Cerver you're right.
That's beautiful
I noted this in my notebook. So right
„WHY EVERYTHING IS RUINING YOUR LIFE?” This should be the ultimate video
Why life is ruining your life?
Jasenka Vukelić why is your life ruining your life ruining your life
nailed it haha
"WHY RUINING YOUR LIFE IS RUINING YOUR LIFE"
@@jasenkavukelic5047 good question
The irony is that this video is actually a self improvement video.
My thoughts exactly! Isn't this guy's whole channel about self improvement?
i do find it funny that this dude is contributing to the problem with self improvement industry with his channel
@@niklas5948 I think his point is to not surround your life around self-improvement rather than pursuing and living life. Like he does. Basically, do less consuming and more doing. He is not the same as his viewers. He is doing less consuming and doing more. Aka focusing on his TH-cam career, outside work, experiencing life and help advising people. Self help is useless if thats all you surround your improvement by. Find a passion outside self help so you can actually implement it to be beneficial. Yes self help can be useful, however if all your focus is on self-help, it won’t get you to the same place as the people you may look up to. That’s why he brought up successful people. Focus on doing. (Learning about topics you are passionate about, going outside, exploring, learning new hobbies) rather than consuming self help n being isolated
@@mcod99 tell people they are shit, convince them you can makr them better. Motovator are just less obvious manipulator
The best self improvement method is to experience and learn from your mistakes and bad choices rather than let them dictate your life and turn you into a snowflake
it’s kinda crazy how nobody’s talking about Antozent, they are selling 250 self help books for the price of one
I will be the first reply
I will be the second reply
I will be the reply that ends the chain stupidly early
bot comment. antozent is a scam.
moral of the story: just go out and live, don't over obsess with improving your life without living it.
Yah carpe diem really ;-) Humans put so much pressure on their lives because it's the only thing they learned sadly!!
As a late teen desperately trying to make an philosophical equilibrium in the pandemic, i defo need this.
@@deadchannel443 it’s wonderful that you are able to assess your needs to better yourself 💕
@@AlexiaHDIntuition I’ve sort of gained a few ideals, such as to avoid jealousy, inferior complex and validation (has been my biggest struggle coming back to school) but having ideals while being in a conversation has been hellish because I have million different things in my mind obstructing with being simply present. For something that cures social anxiety it creates more. Self improvement is only valuable when you actually help yourself.
@@deadchannel443 U R welcome ;-)
It's like reading a cookbook but never actually cooking. haha
Good one
why did i read it as cockbook wtf
@@medonja9361 I at first read it as cockblock but never actually sucking. I'm a recovering porn addict bro, I'm still feeling the side effects a year later 😭
@@pjswag2118 dang brooo thats tough 😂
@@medonja9361 yeah, I was a mega addict in my past bruh, I thought I was over with that shit
At that point it isn't self-improvement that's damaging you, it's acknowledging self-improvement without executing it that does damage
Couldn't have said it better
Like practice to talk in front of mirror, that is self-improvement too.
@John Wick exactly, people go on and on about how they need to improve. But they never DO it. It's always some procrastination
bruh well said this is extremely true
@@wyattthacker3679 omg where can I get that sweater?
Self improvement is never making your Life worse but you have to take action. Thats what it is all about.
??? dumb
A more appropriate title would be this: Why the obsession of self-improvement is ruining your life
I agree 👍
Wouldn't get enough clicks. Not attacking him or anything, I'm with him completely here, the title holds and it's not a false title and it delivers what it says. But youtubers also need to make some money. Making the title more attractive to clicking on isn't being a bad human, it's smart advertising, until it becomes false advertising, or as we on youtube call it, clickbait.
I notice that since a months ago, I only prefer to pursue my legitimit goals that I want and that's it!. I have live in a poor family, I only want a better house, better food, better clothes, to certain degree, and stay "stock" in there until I feel the need to improve something else, that's how I feel moving free and with confort in life, if sometimes I need to be more rigid some times on certain things, then I do it, follow your gut, sometimes I complain I let the place to feel like shit some times. In my opinion support the values, ideas, paradigms, that makes you feel better, that makes you feel that you have a normal bearable life, that makes you feel satisfied 80% of the time.
@@avananana No, the title is false , it clearly makes us think the problem is self improvment. I feel I wasted my time because there was nothing new. I already watched another youtuber talking exacly the same thing but with the appropriate title. I clicked curious to see why he is saying self improvement is a problem and if the title was right, I would not had wasted my time.
"...need to make some money". It does not justify misleading titles and you talk as if he doesn't make much money. He probably makes more than us all combined in this discussion. But we have this mentality nowadays that to sell something using such tricks is "smart" instead of unethical.
Definitely agree with that one. It would give a bit more context as what he is trying to say. Throughout the beginning of the video, I thought he was spouting nonsense until I got to the end, but it was completely different from the title of the video.
in short: self improvement is only best suited for those who take ACTION
very clear and simple
Period
I think self improvement techniques are tools which should be actively applied to achieve things you're intrinsically, genuinely into.
as with everything lol
I couldn’t agree more 👏
Better to hack and slash through life with a dull sword than sit inside with a sharp one. I really like that. 🗡
hack AND slash *
I agree but I like the japanese quote better: 'I'd rather be a warrior in the garden then a gardener in a war.'
why not go around the forest
@@youngbazzy3751 its meaning is entirely a different thing it doesn't relate with the video
sounds like a gaming quote. :) which is applicable in real life as well. :) hmmmmmmm
"Like what else you gonna do? Get worse?"
Exactly what I've been doing for 2 years now.
Yep fuckin same man i’m ready to just go
Like I keep thinking I hit rock bottom but it js goes sm deeper
Agreed... Self-improvement can turn into self-sabotage when taken to extremes.
You have to find a limit then, listen to your body, don't rush anything and Self-Improvement will work much better
@sly dankass what do you mean ?
Does self care count as being stuck in the comfort zone? I have anxiety and trying my best to find things to relax me but now I feel guilty for feeling I should be doing more.
A noble pursuit: Do more. Say less.
is ruining your life?
@@muffinberg7960No I'm saying it's a noble pursuit rather than just talking about what you want to do without applying yourself
@@LiamMartyn is ruining your life? =)
Yes. If you spend your life planing and planing but not doing nothing at the end you might not know anything
@@PapolloDraws Exactly 👍
“Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation.”
― Oscar Wilde
good one. sharing.
“I’m livin in an idea, livin in an idea from another mans mind” -Frank Ocean
Perhaps I’m looking at it the wrong way but I don’t fully agree with this. I concur with the general sentiment but I think it’s ok if you do what others do as long as it’s still authentic to yourself. Everyone’s just a blank canvas that gets painted on by numerous entities be it your parents friends society whatever. I think its about evaluating what they’ve painted and altering things where u see fit. Like of course most of my opinions have been held by others before me especially if it’s not regarding something personal to me but it’s about making sure the point is evaluated not just blindly believed. Of course my life will be similar to everyone else’s somehow but as long as it’s what I want to do and feel I should do. Of course someone else on Earth will share even my most esoteric passion and that’s ok as long as it’s what I truly want to do
One of my favorites of O. Wilde:
_"Choose yourself, everybody's already taken"_
Oh the hypocrisy
Why I wouldn’t have thought about this dark side of obsessive self improvement.
Thank you for sharing this hidden perspective.
The biggest takeaway i got is that not taking action after preparing yourself to do so is a detriment to yourself. I needed this video thank you.
The biggest takeaway I ever got was from Dominos, it was like 6 pizzas and 3 boxes of wedges man
Nice conclusion
Is it just me who finds wedges with pizzas wrong?
Thank you, thats why I was stressed aboout
I hate the fact that "self improvement" has become a cult of people that endorse toxic positivity.
Working on yourself is amazing. Pretending that everything is possible is not!
Cult🤔
everything is possible
Smart kid!
pretending that everything is fun and games 24/7 wouldve been a greater way to describe it (my opinion) otherwise I totally agree with you... but literally everything is possible tho
@@misole999 nope, it is not. In the fundamentals of logic, it's not.
We spend far too long sharpening our swords rather than actually slashing and hacking.
We're almost fooling ourselves into thinking that we're growing but we're just stuck in our comfort zones.
For sure. I've built a wealth of knowledge from listening to many great people online that will surely come in handy at some point, but as of right now only a tiny portion of it is getting put to use.
@@HolyCodzta The main goal should be implementation instead of rampant consumption.
If productivity is measured based on output, then we'll be doing a lot more with our lives.
But we get out of them one slice at a time.
Yeah...been there done that :(
Summary: Preparation, planning and learning is key, but don’t overdo it. Take action, you are running out of time!
perfect recipe to build up stress and anxiety
@Takezo Miyamoto but he is right. Marcus Aurelius was right. The stoic philosophers all understood that out time on this earth is limited and you got to live life at the fullest
@Hendrik Kiefer what does living life to fullest even mean? You can't live life to the fullest everyday. That a recipe or anxiety and depression.
@@beastfromtheabyss it just means to enjoy one's life.
It’s also that if you’re always obsessed with self improvement to the end of time then you’ll never feel grateful about reaching your goals. You’ll simply have disappointment in yourself over not having yet reached a goal even further than the one you originally set.
As a middle schooler who couldn’t even do a single push-up, I would’ve dreamed of having “average” chest strength, but now that I have average chest strength I feel just as miserable compared to muscular people. It’s the hedonic treadmill.
whenever I have an urge to post a comment on youtube or reddit, I just tell myself, "shut up, nobody cares about what you have to say." and so i'll delete whatever comment I'm about to make.
Because that's the truth, as a man, if you are not successful, nobody cares about what you have to say.
It's not about other people caring what you have to say and offer. you have your own sword that you care about so show it!
@David Crespo he doesn't need to, because if you didn't notice. He found success by realising what he needs to feel and be; that's what all the people should do in their lives man. And as a plus, he's kind enough to share it with us, so reanalyse his comment, cause it might help you too... (I'm a psychologist btw so I know)
@@mxro_jo What field are you in? I'm curious, as I'm taking a class currently.
You're wrong, you are only looking from your own perspective. I care about what you have to say. This made me think, you had an impact on me.
Let it out man! Don’t hide your light under a bushel basket. I like to read comments; some i agree with, some i dont but i enjoy hearing different and unique perspectives. Take care!
"Comparison is the thief of joy." - Roosevelt
But if you don't compare
You don't improve
@@hussainbohra7235 disagree. You have to have your own goals that you wanted because... And your reasons. If you build your goals based on somebodys success, that you dont have you are not improving yourself, you only competing with somebody.
@@petrpernikovec6601 Maybe its called motivation
@@em3m998 Motivation is like a smell, it goes away.
@@petrpernikovec6601 This is like right and wrong at the same time lmao
Obsessing over self-improvement makes me think of the phrase: “stay ready, so you never have to get ready”. However, when you’re obsessed with “staying ready” rather than just executing the very thing you’ve spent so much time preparing for, you miss out on opportunities.
Facts fres 👏🏿
🤯🙌🏾
Mi fi tell my girl, I swear, jah kno star... The mount of times that I do that too my self, I worry about other people approval especially family and not worry about what's going to get me to the that place "I have to be", yuh zimi, focusing on how I'm not there and journey it going to take now due to each set back, so I miss out because I have on track mind and fret about the possible misfortune and not actual being flexible or adaptable.
Preppers come to mind.
That's so true it's like from Batman Begins bruce is like I've trained but Ra's says training is nothing the will is everything the will to act
The knight and sword metaphor is SPOT ON!! Love it!!
Stop being obbsesed of self improvement and start to live real life
I took note of that, the best advide I heard this year
I know, right? This video somehow made me at peace! I have been thinking about starting some workout routine for a whole year now, and I'm only now realizing I make like 4 km of fast walking/running with a bag/or like 20km with a bike per day just by living that busy student life. I am on my feet educating and socializing myself from 7 to 7. F*** that evening workout, they exist to help you not hount you. Being healthy/fit is the goal here afterall!
@@anasubic3090 Depends on your goal. If you want to make yourself stronger physically, you probably need a weight workout. If you just want to be fit without being overweight, having a busy life like that is most likely enough
@@LEONSKENNEDY91 yeah, that's right. i keep weights in plan, but as long as physics takes 7-9 hours of pure lessons, not even counting commuting and studying alone, i will have to compromise.. so it was comforting for me to be reminded that achieving the priorities is an actual plan here ((and being fit and not overweight, as you said it, luckily comes in the package naturally))
As an arsonist, I approve of this message
Internet: how to self improve.
Also internet: how self improvement is ruining you.
Wait what? A medium offering opposing standpoints?? Unbelievable...
Yes, a lot of contradictions and it can get quite confusing listening to everyone’s belief system. I think everyone should just do what works best for them. Trust yourself and just go for it, whatever it is. If you want to “self improve” then do it! We just have to learn to have a balance and not obsess
No it is just this idiot.
😂
F = -F
(c) sir Isaac Newton
What made me realize this was seeing a picture of Mark Zuckerberg in his early 20s working to develop Facebook on his laptop.
He was surrounded by various unhealthy drinks while giving the camera man the finger.
Made me realize that “these people” got to where we all want to go by focusing in on the thing that was actually going to get them there; not doing some crazy workout routine or having an insane diet.
Zuckerberg didnt developed facebook. He did steal it from the Winklevoss brothers.
@@TudasStrategiaAI that's besides the point bro
But an athlete needs workout and diet.
Nah it's very high IQ, smart people are the first ones most of the time, working hard is not enough to be a multimillionaire or being one of the best in a specific field
Facts
IMO, self improvement means growing as a human both mentally and emotionally.
It's about learning to deal with the ups and downs of life and being content with your own life.
It's about seeing where you're lacking, finding solutions to it, making those changes, and building good habits.
You don't need to be the best at everything. It could be as simple as drinking more water and making it a part of your daily routine.
You have to accept the problem, find a solution, and just start. Be persistent and watch the results over time.
So living life ?
@@TheLily97232 Everyone lives, not everyone grows.
Feel like Matt D’Avella and Better Ideas are taking a turn in their videos, they are more nuanced about self-improvement, and I think that is the way they can really help people start doing thing, and stop wasting their time on TH-cam watching self-improvement videos.
Hmm...you should make a TH-cam video about that.
@@QuillASMR hmm you should make a video on what other videos he should make
I think they reached a new level of understanding of life
They are the game changers.
& the game's called world!
Agree
Obsessing over self improvement is the same as a musician thinking that an expensive instrument will somehow magically make them sound good
Just like the sound is in the hands, your life is in yours
Don't sweat the small stuff, just be yourself
We're all winging it here, nobody is perfect, nobody has to nor should be
Amen
Beta mindset
@@mikeimmonen6619 Delta male grindset
Sounds like fucking excuses
Expensive instument better btw. Thats a truth.
Whats more important than learning is putting it into practice
Last week I ran my first 5k without stopping and all the time I could hear the voice in my head saying that I can do it. Forwago, thank you so much for everything!!
No one:
Better Ideas: “Why ruining your life is ruining your life.”
Houlmnt I noticed that ages ago! On the available emojis on keyboards is the blue spiral too, I’ve always wondered why that’s there...no other colour, just blue. It’s not representing tornados or whirlpools or anything. The pink heart has 2 triple heart logos too, similar to the girl pedo heart inside a heart thing. No other colour. 😷🤔☠️
"why ruinung life is fun"
"Knowledge is useless without the wisdom to act upon it."
Just because you read a self-improvement book doesn't immediately make you a better person. You need to get out there and figure stuff out on your own and EMBODY the good things that you've read.
Literally me. I know how to fix my shit, but don't want to take actions on it. I know I should seek therapy, but that would make me have to make changes and improvements. It's hard to force yourself into doing things when you feel like it's good enough....even when it shouldn't be
No knowledge is useless when you have logic 😂🤦♂️💀🙄.
It’s good to be confident not delusional.
Hm...you’re right but isn’t wisdom about have years of experience or knowledge? If that’s correct that sounds contradictory. Lmaoo I’m just saying 🤷🏽♀️
You’re still right I actually got a new book which is Becoming Bulletproof by Evy Poumpouras a former secret service agent I am not just using for self improvement, but apply what I know to life. Because when you’re in a situation where someone is disrespecting you wait until there’s no one left, but you, and the other person. I learned that from the interview by Lisa Bilyeu who’s was interviewing Evy. Love that interview much respect.
@@skillo6399 Man, I relate with you on so many levels..
I don't know man, by self-improving I feel my confidence levels rise. reading books and applying what I learned
really does help me in a lot of situations. ever since I started staying home more and looking into my future
I noticed one thing about my friends. All we used to do is go out hang out smoke a joint or a few drinks and talk about
how we will be rich and how we will develop good habits. I started doing my own improvement which really made me realise
my friends still do what they did for the past few years. their highlighted story wouldn't be of how they succeeded or what they achieved.
it is more like how fucked up they got on whatever and be proud and say how I'm missing out. Their excuse is that gotta live while we are young.
I want to be flying on Jet Skis and travelling the world while I'm young not getting fucked up in my dodgy town for the next 5 years.
Thank you to whoever read this lol. was meant to be a small comment but got carried away.
so wya 1 year later?
@@idkicy2690 well, i quit drinking and smoking for months now, (I'm 21) which was part of the mission.
Basically quit all my bad habits and some I'm still working on.
i dropped out of college, was doing computer science for 3 years that was putting me in a bad place so i made a decision to move past that.
Iv basically learned a lot about myself because when you cut the shit and get real work done that's when life gets really challenging.
Failure after failure after failure but i pushed past it all and now i look back thinking....
i put on 10kg of muscle,
I do novice Boxing.
Got a nice car,
Sometimes i feel like an alien within a crowd of small minded people, but when i meet someone successful or with same mindset it all makes sense.
If you hang with 5 millionaires you will be the 6th,
If you hang with 5 bums you will be the 6th.
to make it short iv become a tank haha. i work full time i train everyday, nobody understands why I'm doing all this but iv to be a millionaire by 25 so.....
in this world the only support is me myself and I.
The biggest thing that i realised is, Close ones don't like to see you win because yous started at the same level, but once you start going up and they stay down, they cant bare and hate when you win, but they don't show it in obvious ways...
Strangers in fact love see people winning.
@@danielprosvirnevs4818 I’m happy for you, it really takes a man to quit bad habits and start improving and actually take it serious, I know we jus strangers but I support you bro, keep improving n stay strong 🙌
@@idkicy2690 My brother, i appreciate it 100%
why not use this post to throw out ur achievements, it would be great to know how your progressing through hardships and nailing success.
We are strangers but we got similar mindsets .
Keep up the hard work g
@@danielprosvirnevs4818 Thank you for your comments. They are very motivational, and thank you for warning me about close ones starting to be jealous of you. I have just started my self-improvement journey and I will try to remember your words. I would love to keep in touch with you here, to share some future thoughts and accomplishments. Keep it up, brother! I'm proud of you!
I agree with what you’re saying - to an extent.
The whole point of self improvement is so we can apply what we’re learning to our everyday life and if we’re not then it’s a waste of your time and energy.
I’ve read countless books and it helped me quit smoking, create better habits, manage my emotions and become a better version of myself and for my partner BUT AGAIN, it’s because I was applying everything I was learning to better my relationships and myself.
I think individuals who think self improvement is a waste of time is because they’re not putting it into action. And it’s like losing weight, it’s not an overnight success. Self improvement takes time and effort! It took me about a year to unravel some trauma and face it, which ultimately led me to where I am now. Things take time!!
"Knowledge is potential power. It only becomes power when you apply it." - Tony Robbins
Applied knowledge is power!
That’s bullshit. Try going into a university library without a student ID. The man with a stick will be just around the corner. Now tell me more about this power you speak of,
@@Graeberwave lmao are you high? Or did you make a joke that just flew over my head?
Loved it
"JUST DO IT!!"
Shia Lebeouf
True
"RIGHT NOW!!"
Needed that : ))
This video popped up for me during a time when I wasn't feeling completely secure in my own progress, worrying about what I should have achieved already, and what I should achieve by this age etc. Sometimes getting so caught up in those details that I would get overwhelmed and just freeze which is counter-productive. It's amazing how much you can self-improve 'in the background' when you're not actually focussed and self-improvement. This video was really helpful, thank you!
This should be the channel front page video, this is the big takeaway for sure. You find yourself in these places because you get knocked down or you're down on your luck, but no amount of sharpening the sword really fixes anything on its own as obvious as that seems like it is.
Not being able to gain new skills just by studying up is something I had to learn the hard way in my college years, and it basically applies the same here but with being the version of you you want to be. That intangible confidence and wisdom doesn't just turn on eventually, you just have to actually be gripped by what you actually do in whatever you're after and start powering through being the not-so-desirable version of yourself you are now in the moment, because beyond just realizing the dreams of being better you _do_ still _right now_ really care about and want the stuff you need to do.
Wow! This one hit home for me.
Same
This was a finisher
Damn thank you for that...
th-cam.com/video/dQw4w9WgXcQ/w-d-xo.html
Because you are narcissist?
So one of the best self improvement advice I've ever heard is ironically about stop focusing on self improvement, but rather mastering what I like doing. Thanks man.
I definitely sabotage myself with my obsession with self-improvement sometimes. I often forget that most of my improvements will come from getting out there doing stuff. This is a really important topic, and a great video!
DUDE, I was stuck in this headspace for so long, reading books, and never actually applying the knowledge I was absorbing into the actions in my life. Once I was able to put more effort and time into actually DOING the work instead of learning how to during both my 9-5 and my passions on the side, did I start to improve and find more enjoyment out of them!!!
How are you doing now
@@badakh301 Doing much better now, struggling with different things as I peel back layers of the ego! Thanks a lot for asking! How are you?
@@RisenFallen am fine always striving for improvement now i am thinking of changing approach.... Moving towards spirituality
Consuming self improvement is not a bad thing, because we all need somewhere to start and learn from not just ourselves but others. Its consuming and not implementing which will keep you in an endless loop
@@ManoHertz I agree with you completely! Thanks so much for the reply!!
Short summary : Self help is useless unless you turn it into action.
And unless it takes you to where you want to be in life.
@@DrAElemayo For that you need action right ?
Hadhoudtn you’re both right. Action is necessary to make any change in any direction but It’s not only about action, it has to be coupled With actually knowing what direction you want to be in life. It’d be pointless both reading books and putting into practice ideas about socializing if I’m already a very social person. So he’s right, aimless self improvement (including the ideas you put into action, practice and perfect) is kinda pointless if it’s not taking you to where you want to be in life. There’s a famous quote that says, “growth for the sake of growth is the ideology of a cancer cell.” I think it applies. Imo, at some point Action without direction, is as useless at not taking any action at all.
And BAM, now you're dead
@@DrAElemayo, unless where you want to be is simply, Improved. Any better situation then your in now, would mean you've reached your goal.
Tired of "working on myself", I will now be unapologetically insane.
Mood
I love this
Fr
Truee
Simply; Live
This video came at a perfect time in my life. I've been feeling depressed every single day for months, and I do believe that the main reason is thinking I should be a perfect man in every single are of my life that has all answers. It just isn't healthy.
How are you now? Got out of depression?
@@stansvitsa1 Sincerely, I am at my best in quite a while. I feel good almost all the time, I have a nice job, a great relationship with my loved ones and made a lot of progress at the gym.
Never give up, guys. Find your own path and always be grateful!
@@muundus7 great to hear! So happy for you 🙏🏻
4:39 is such an impressive analogy. It's such a captive way to explain what he's saying.
You're working towards an idea instead of applying the idea.
_Me reading the title while procrastinating_ : "I knew it!"
_Goes back to procrastinating_
but for real, thank you for inspiring me to get into self development!!
Hahahah... Soon we gonna see: “Why procrastinating is good for health”
No man! NO!
@@betterideas "I'll just watch it later"
😂
i really like the dull sword analogy. you can spend all your time inside your own head thinking about how you can be better at something but by doing so, you're forgetting that a lot of this is what you'd be doing anyway just by going out there and getting experience. some theory can make a big difference, for sure! but while you eventually get diminishing returns from theory, you can never have too much experience.
sick video, man! :)
Fully agree!! 🙌🏻
I agree with you about experience. I was thinking about all the things that I just went out and did in my twenties and what great things came from that action of going in and doing them. I also thought about the growth in my career when I made organic gut choices without wondering about it first.
@Quantum Man The Photonic Mastermind! Thanks, Quantum Man. Good encouragement imagery
Dawg I was just telling my cousin something like this last night lol. I felt like I've been spending too much time learning how to improve and haven't been applying shit in life
Same
None of these "success's" will avail you when you die, what have you prepared for in the next life
This life compared to the hereafter is like a water droplet in the Pacific Ocean
You could say that you were living in an iFacade.
Maybe you should check out the "how to stop learning and start implementing" self help book haha
"There is no use continually brooding over who you really are. For, just as in narcissistic self-observation the preoccupation with the effect nullifies the effect, the self of the self-explorer is reduced as his need to explore increases. Excessive psychoanalysis weakens the psyche. A person does not find his self by turning his inner life upside down, he creates it by putting something on his feet in this world. A self that only sees itself ends up destroying itself"
Whered you get this?
@@Griot-Guild from a book called "Kleine Philosophie für Nichtphilosophen" by Friedhelm Moser. I read the spanish version, though ("Pequeña Filosofía para no filósofos") and I translated that part with google translator, so it might have some mistakes, I don't know.
thats very well written
Great quote
@@twistingtheway thanks, ill check it out
The biggest problem with people who think they need self improvement is that they feel they have to put everything else on hold until they're satisfied. People even set aside developing relationships or going out to find one, because they don't think they're ready. You can go throughout your entire life trying to improve things but never feel satisfied. It can be pretty heartbreaking to think about all those missed opportunities.
preach
This is why every time I watch one of these videos, I pedal my stationary bike at the same time. I'm in bad shape, and watching the videos gives me ideas, but ideas are nothing without action... so I make certain to be doing something and not just watching.
THANK YOU for articulating this so perfectly.
Until recently, I was obsessed with consuming content, watching youtube, reading, doing everything I could do to educate myself.
Filling my cup with knowledge until it overflows, every day, for hours on end. But I wasn't making progress and it was super frustrating.
It wasn't until I decided to:
- set goals for myself
- watch only relevant content that would help me reach those goals and
- started PRACTICING what I had learned
that I started to see some progress.
This is so important!
There is this perception that knowledge is power, and to some degree that is true. But real knowledge comes from cementing what you learn with practice.
"Go outside and live your life"
2020 pandemic - HAHA!
saganist and for extroverts to either go insane or be reformed. I’m one of the saved ones
saganist it’s sad ‘cause im introvert but i want to be extroverted. The pandemic is messed up
*else
I truly believe this video appeared in my recommended for a reason. I really needed it, thank you so much!
Same
This is the truth. Ran into this issue and am currently on stress leave from work because of it. Have been doing great in life but was never happy or satisfied. Put myself down if I wasn't 100% on point. Would get angry when I didn't have time to read. Was chasing the next "improvement". Feeling better now and this video is great to hear.
Lately I've been on a self improvement binge, which is the first time I've done so in years, I got curious about this video wondering "Is it really that bad?", and then you talked about people's attitudes towards self improvement being a bandaid to try and fix life's problems, and I'm there thinking "Oh ya, I relate, which is why I gave it up before". lol
Self improvement without expectations is probably the best kind, but some people won't do that because people love having expectations.
Also, I relate so heavily on the self improvement for being social, due to my previous self improvement obsession, but sadly, while it did give me success in being around people, and I even had wonderful relationships and stuff like that, all my social interactions feel very artificial and disconnected and all doomed to fail, because I have a foundation that's more on script than genuine human heart.
When I was young, I heard that an admirer said to a pianist, “I’d give my life to play like this.” The pianist replied, “I did.” Everyone that runs had to learn to walk. They fell down and their parents didn’t berate them. The parents encouraged the babies...and what do you know? They not only learned to run, most kids learn to ride bicycles & learn to drive. We start at the beginning and practice. If you keep up, you’ll be good at it. Reading does go hand in hand with learning! Sometimes, it saves a bunch of falling down!!!
Sometimes the words don't make sense without the practice and experience and I think anybody whos "cerebrallized" socialising knows this horrible feeling.
@@johnwoods7526 I totally get it. I enjoy your videos. Glad to have found you. You express your thoughts beautifully.
So when I started my personal development journey, I found myself reading a lot of books, and being really excited about all the different ways I was going to improve my life and make a lot of money. I would take all this information and share this with my wife with a lot of excitement. Finally one day she came to me and asked me why I was learning all this when I was in applying any of it.I took that to heart and applied everything I learned from then on! I became an action taker!!! It changed my life!
"conditional happiness
." 😉
I gave up alcohol 8 years ago. I realized that achieving happiness is not the daily / hourly destination that I desire - today I focus on being content throughout the day.
So far I'm learning to be content and uncomfortable situations where I was discontent. Hence my situational happiness /(conditional happiness) is being addressed.
Hope everyone’s having a good day
I"ll add a slightly different perspective on the issue: you better balance your *theory* vs *practice* ratio. Self improvement is awesome and important, but if all you do is absorbing theory and not taking enough *action* , it becomes couter productive.
In my view, *theory* and *practice* are both integrated parts of the whole, "Self Improvement." each one reinforces and informs the other. What you call "living life" for me i call: the practical part of self improvement; deliberate action. I wouldn't want to simply "live life" but rather take action in life that deliberatly improves myself. For example, i see going out and socializing as a technic for self imlrovement.
@vlаdimir рutin is аndrеi раnin jfk is jimmy carter I don't know for a 100% that it is round, but I believe the scientists and trust their experiments
@vlаdimir рutin is аndrеi раnin jfk is jimmy carter and btw I haven't said the world was round. I think you got the wrong person
I'm really glad this first self improvement video i see
I'm having one of those nights where I felt so insecure about my image and my fashion sense that I told my friends I didn't want to go out for drinks with them. It's like I was meant to see your video. I never feel completely happy with myself and I'm constantly "improving" or "re-inve nting" myself without actually trying to be happy with who I truly am. Social media fucks with my head so much: buy the latest clothing, do your make up this way and you'll look better, your hair, your diet, your productivity and your career prospects... It's total overkill. Thank you for this.
EllenGT500 u are not alone, now, remember that u are perfect just the way u are:)
Alexander Buchelli that’s really kind of you to say. Thank you
To sum up, put in work everything you read or learn, it's not just pure theory, it's also a matter of practice, lots of practice.
I did Tony Robbins’ Personal Power II about 8 years ago, got myself out of a rut, and have never looked back. Going out into the world and doing things and changing the approach if those things don’t work is definitely the way to go vs analysis paralysis.
you’ve elaborated a solution for an obsession that’s bombarding. I’ve never realized the amount of time I’d lose if I kept going like this. Thank you.
I'm not necessarily trying to improve myself. I'm trying to fix my problems so I can enjoy life without all that anxiety and depression
Brother you need to grieve unresolved trauma that goes into the subconcious is the cause of this, think during your day what causes you to get triggered
Self improvement will not fix anxiety or depression. That's what therapy is for.
You're right that self-improvement is a means to an end, and that it's not a goal in of itself.
However, I'm starting to wonder if it's a genuine character trait. Reflection and learning and improving is all I know how to do (along with daydreaming of course). I make mistakes. I ponder over them. And I change accordingly. It is somewhat of an obsession as I spend countless hours watching and reading about philosophy and psychology and grand ideas. Even if most of it simply my interests and hobbies and intended for self-improvement, I have noticed a difference (however small) in my day-to-day.
Most importantly, it's helping me to find direction. I can't say if all this seemingly "wasted time" will work out in the end, but my relationships with those around me are improving. My writing is improving. And I'm becoming somewhat of a counselor for those around me.
It's hard to find that balance, but after several anxious years of "what the hell am I doing with my life," I've learned to trust my gut and believe in delayed gratification. I trust that it will all work out in the end, and that the countless of hours I spent watching Matt D and Academy of Ideas would have all been worth it.
I feel the exact same way
Wow, this aged poorly. I was definitely a victim of the "self-help brainwashing" Alice Cappelle mentioned in her video that recently blew up. I could go on and on about how I'm different now than when I made this original comment. But that's cringey. There's too much to say in a short youtube comment that wouldn't thoroughly address the problem. All I can say is this: you'll figure it out. Everyone's path is different, and so, the advice people need to hear is also different. Your "purpose in life" is going to keep shifting, and that's okay. It'll stabilize with life experience and confidence. Self-improvement is inevitable. No need to force it and overthink it. You'll figure it out.
The irony of reading and learning about “socialising” but without actually doing it.
tbh, with everything in life i just have to remember myself that doing something to the extremes is never a good idea, doesnt matter what it is. and yes this goes for self improvement too and most of what people online seem to tell you is kind of pointless because it doesnt even resonante with you or fit you. its just all about balance and doing things that feel right in a current moment and not what other people tell you you should do.
this weekend was a nice example. i could have watched hours of self improvement videos or books and telling me how i should go to the gym or that i need to stop doing this or i need to do this or what ever... i could of... but i did not.
you know what i did instead? i woke up and saw a glassbowl in my kitchen and randomly got the idea i could build a little terrarium in there and then i went out to the forest to collect stuff like moss and whatever and came back home to build it and then i had a little nap and after that was cooking something nice while having some music on and on the evening i was going out with a friend dancing in our fav. club. and i had a nice day... thats self improvement to me. to improve in having as many nice days as you can. and i dont need any videos for that either. its all balance. i am a human and not a robot, and not a productive working drone either. the only thing that matters really is to have fun and enjoy yourself, have some friends to share, and do or learn something new every day (and it doesnt have to be obsessive) just... something... small steps for accomplishment. maybe learn a new cooking recipe tomorrow or a new way to fold your clothes so you can fit your stuff into smaller storage... just something as new input to keep your brain moving.
its not about becoming the best version of yourself or becoming a millionaire or becoming that successful guy at the gym... its just getting peace with yourself, enjoying yourself in the moment and on top... try to get a little bit better every day.
‘Experience is the teacher of all things’ - Caesar
What i dont really like hearing is "go out there and socialize". Man how, with who? If you are unable to socialize in your work, in school or whereever you go for daily routine, then you lack social skills and you certainly cant just go out there, sit on a bar order a coffee etc then expect to socialize. You were supposed to learn those social skills by yourself at teenage years and if you didnt or better to say couldn't, the only option for you is to get so good at things. Being busy devoting yourself to things can led you to socialize, nothin else.
Its quarantine now so yeah theres not much of an option, but without covid you can go to any bar and talk to anyone. Everyday you go to the store you can interact with the people around you. Doesnt mean being annoying, but interact with the world.
I don’t know why author didn’t manage to learn to communicate with people alone, but I did it.
I studied a lot of psychology, worked for free with psychologists, thought a lot about my thinking, and eventually I started to socialize better by correcting childhood traumas and dogmas. It is paradoxical that when I was surrounded by people, I did not know how to communicate with them as I learned being alone, engaged in the development of professional skills.
I still socialize, all that “mask and social distancing” was made for us not to socialize and talk, I do it anyways, fuck whatever everyone else says. If you peak my interest I’m gonna strike up a conversation with you.
If you go deep enough on their so called "self improvement". One of the best psychologists/youtuber jordan peterson brings up the topic of persona in one of his lectures. Persona is basically a psychoanalytic term that means a mask that you put out and its how people see you. Simply saying that we resent it too much that we see the persona as being fake whilst in fact its not. He says the so called mask is a gateway or a manifestation of our thoughts into actions and words. Its basically a window path into our true selves and the fact that we have under developed personas prevents us from socializing well because we almost immediately expect it to be easy. Everything in life either takes effort to do or atleast to master. And we should look into developing our personas as it is very important because evidently not everyone will be happy seeing you naked the first time you meet. You have to give it time.
i feel like i am unable to “go out and socialize” because what i am concerned with what people will think. I know complimenting someone on their laugh or makeup might make them feel nice, but i am afraid they will take it weird and and not like me, or that it was strange of me to do that to them because they are a stranger. i dislike that i don’t know everyone’s personality, it makes it feel risky to strike up a conversation (not that i know how to do that anyway), because of the reaction the person might have. awkward social situation are the worst.
I got into this self improvement thing in february last year. In october I was at the hospital psychiatric emergency at 4 A.M. Well, I had untreated mental health issues, sure, but at the beginning I was only getting better in life (I was 20). Excellent grades, reading a book per week, "sharpening my knife" and it is very very difficult to realise the problem with it when we're doing great. I got so obsessed with being perfect, amazing, totally not average, outstanding that I forgot myself and everything around me. what I really enjoyed doing, who I really enjoyed talking to. when I noticed it, it was kinda too late to stop the damage it already did to my mental health. I got to therapy, took meds and everything, but to this day I'm afraid of doing certain things and even feel bad sometimes when getting entertainment because of the mentality that I could be improving myself, this isn't right at all.
I feel you, I always felt smth was both right and wrong while reading self-dev, I stopped now and know enough, let's try to forget about all this and enjoy an authentic life
self improvement is like a drug, and you are one of it's many sad victims, it leads to elitism and perfectionism when taken to extremes which fucks your mental health
I think I needed this. been stuck 4-5 years spinning the same circles...
Dude you are an INSPIRATION!!! I lost my job due to the pandemic. Since then, I've started a TH-cam Channel on Personal Development...and it is GROWING!!! Thanks for all of your content, and to everyone else...NEVER GIVE UP!!
That's really good. I'll soon start my channel too, but the only camera I got is my phone camera and my earphone microphone. Let's see what I can do with it
i quit watching motivational videos when they started making me feel guilty about not workin on my goals "24/7" working hours upon hours happens when youre in a muse and ideas are flowing. but if youre unsure of your future plans then motivational content wont guide u
Same tired of grind and hustle culture 😂 like 24/7
Exactly! It makes me feel so anxious, like what I’m doing it’s not good enough, that I have to do/work always more!
Exactly, if you’re not sure of your future plans and goals, self improvement is practically useless. The same thing happened to me, I spent a lot of time focusing on self improvement and I didn’t even know what I was doing it for. Eventually I decided to stop so I could just figure out what I want.
@@nateromero4159 frr
I think it's important to emphasize that through knowledge from books or gurus on self-improvement we learn aspects of ourselves that are not helping us. From there, those bits and pieces of information can make a big change in our lives. It isn't so bad to read and read, because at one point in our lives, the knowledge we gained can help us...Though it also right that we can't really expect to change our lives drastically by just reading and not applying what we learned.
This channel is really amazing and has truly inspired me to work harder and be more disciplined. Now I'm a first-year medical student and documenting my journey. Your feedback will be greatly appreciated on my first Vlog.
th-cam.com/video/qkZp3rytPMY/w-d-xo.html
I don’t care how many flaws I have anymore, I have to start living and doing stuff because I can’t wait until I’ve already grown to start living. I want to start living now. This may be as good as it gets. I’ve been counting on myself changing but I haven’t, and meanwhile feeling isolated and like I’m not starting anything. I am so tired of analyzing everything I do. How are some people just good people? Why am I an ass, why did I do that to myself and others?
All you want is to level up in life, living the right way takes mental and spiritual hard work, can be you stoic? Can you do it? The seven spiritual laws to success by Deepak Chopra ❤ @kerbsidetube.CommunityTV.
actually spending a lot of time reading books on this topic made me able to step out of my comfort zone time and time again (even though it always is a small step at a time) despite my terrible anxiety.. which was not something I would ever expect...
That's because you learned and practiced.
I stopped researching self-improvement when I started learning about philosophy. The self-improvement "gurus" started to get on my nerves.
Now I feel I'm much less stressed about everything, and I just go with the flow - but I take action (even if I'm anxious about it) for the things that I know I need to get done. Then I just try to enjoy the little things and recognise when I'm actually enjoying myself when it comes to everything else.
This channel is amazing and has truly inspired me to work harder and be more disciplined. Now I'm a first-year medical student and documenting my journey. Your feedback will be greatly appreciated on my first Vlog.
th-cam.com/video/qkZp3rytPMY/w-d-xo.html
Philosophy is a generic word, it can in fact coincide with self improvement.
Hey man, late reply but worth a shot... What kinda philosophies would you recommend for someone in the same boat as this comment? Things like stoicism or optimistic nihilism? Or anything else?
One rule that helped me avoid this trap is: "Read, then apply." It also helps me weed off the irrelevant titles from my TBR pile.
I agree with you self-improvement without working it’s just wasting time. No pain bo gian. Make a lot mistakes for learning a lot things
"Those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything."
-George Bernard Shaw
unfortunately this is not true
@@katling6061 yes it is
Here's a thought I'd like to share, a couple of years ago when I first picked up self-help books like "The Happiness Trap" & "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F***", I felt very inspired reading them and I was able to effectively remember and apply the techniques and concepts that I read in these books. At the moment, after reading god knows how many "self-help" books, I feel like I got desensitized and I no longer feel inspired. There's a noise of bad (and 'good') advice that I received from these books that I'm overwhelmed by, and affects my decision-making.
I can definitely relate to the thought of "I'm like an alien trying to learn how to interact with humans". Reading these socializing books have helped me a bit (like maybe 10%) but have also made me even more inside my own head when I interact with people. I don't remember it being this tedious to interact with people when I was in middle school, and I didn't read 300 social skills books back then.
Sometimes we adult too hard, we over-engineer simple things, when we're supposed to take a step back and realize life isn't meant to be this complicated.
All you want is to level up in life, living the right way takes mental and spiritual hard work, can be you stoic? Can you do it? The seven spiritual laws to success by Deepak Chopra ❤ @kerbsidetube.CommunityTV.
bro this is honestly how i feel. I feel like everyday something is in my head telling me to have my whole life be sorounded with things to help me self improve and its getting yo a point where I think im more mature then everyone around me even though im not going out and actually getting expierience. But at the same time I feel like im running out of time if I just focus on what normal kids my age are focusing on which is school but I dont wanna persue school, I wanna work from home and make money wherever I go. I hope this feeling around me can come to an end and slow down because I feel like im going to fast to the point where I cant control my speed. I need some guidence, something to hold onto because I feel like im alone in this thinking space.
First, get yourself Balanced, then Neutralize ypurself and later on, Equilibrise yourself. Humans NEED and MUST have Equilibrium, that is not the same to Balance or Neutralising something. Philosophy is everything, people have forgot to thing about what they are doing, you are going to fast, stop yourself, think what you are doing. And have self imporvement, but at the same Time have some time to Entertain yourself. You cant live without that. It´s so funny, Humans want to Escape the Equilibrium, but at the same Time they crave it so they can have Order in their life.
everything has to be done with apprecation. Appreciate the life you're living and love improving at things in it. Love life, and everything about it.
@Better Ideas and everyone else: This is a long comment but please take your time to read it. Hopefully it will open your eyes to a new aspect of your life.
What you discuss here is the problem with the personality culture that has evolved since the beginning of the last century. In western culture, we idolize the individual, and especially individuals who are very open and charismatic. For many people, this new culture suits them, but for just as many it does not. There are people who will always be more happy sitting at home "sharpening their swords" as you describe it, and who will never be at peace with themselves regardless of how good they get at "fighting the monsters outside". This is the problem with the personality culture that has evolved, as it sets an ideal that is only applicable to a percentage of the population.
In the past, the character culture was the predominant one, in which traits such as honor, honesty, perserverence and empathy was in focus. Becoming the "best" was not the goal, but instead people were encouraged to become as good a person as each individual had the capacity for. This culture is a better fit for most people, and it does not require any self help. For instance, everyone knows how to be honest or how to show perseverence. In personality culture on the other hand, where traits such as charisma, well-spokenness and risk taking are prevalent, there are inumerable self-help books and media, becuase it is not obvious how to be, for instance, charismatic.
For those who struggle with self-help, the best advise is to abandon it completely. Reflect on yourself and your personality, your goals and dreams, who you are, and you will find that you know exactly what makes you feel like you are becoming a better person. Quite possibly, you will find that being more like the "popular guy" is not the answer, but that being a loyal and loving partner, a great parent, a reliable colleague and someone your parents can be proud of, is what brings peace and a feeling of personal improvement to yourself.
It will be difficult to cast off the yoke of the personality-idolizing culture that we have been brought up in, but everyone can achieve it.
Well said
Well said. I just want to be somebody in life and have my parents to be proud of me. I'm a lazy fat ass right now but I wanna improve. My mum and dad have invested very heavily in me and I want to re pay them back. That's all.i want man.
Thank you very much for thoses words we really needed them.
More production, less consumption. Thank you for the motivation.
I like the point about doing more than just talking about what you're doing or reading self help books instead of pairing that with practice. I remember one of your older vids about achieving something without telling people about it, pursuing this can be hard but can instill the habit of developing skills properly.
That's one of the things I'm trying to stay away from and why I end each video by saying 'stay practical'
Practical learning is very important, some people learn best by reading, listening, etc. but joining your learning with experience is what can really develop people's skills/knowledge
👍
thank you for this video . i always felt there is something about self-improvement , especially when you do it in a passive way
“Go make some mistakes”
Gah I needed to hear that.
All you want is to level up in life, living the right way takes mental and spiritual hard work, can be you stoic? Can you do it? The seven spiritual laws to success by Deepak Chopra ❤ @kerbsidetube.CommunityTV.
The reason that people don’t “improve” while consuming self improvement content is when they don’t apply their knowledge. Instead of applying a video to become more social, they just watch another video. That’s when self improvement becomes counterproductive.
I like the little jokes sprinkled in with the advice. It makes your videos stand out from other self improvement youtubers. And it makes your videos fun and inspiring to watch. 😁
"Go make some mistakes, go live life." That's a real good tip
Self improvement by reading is big because people are scared to make mistakes
This is something so simple but I never thought about it before. Nice one. Explains a lot of shit I see.
I heard this in the right moment. Even when I try to "improve" myself I still feel empty. I start to asking me what is wrong with me... But now I understand it.