Subtle Signs She Likes You, Dating Advice For Introverts & More
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 20 พ.ย. 2024
- In this video, Hallee and I answer your questions and provide a woman's perspective on some different situations. I hope you all enjoy and find this helpful!
HALLEE'S TH-cam CHANNEL:
/ halleesmith
CONTACT/ FOLLOW ME:
Instagram: @courtneycristineryan
EMAIL/COLLAB: courtneycristineryan@gmail.com
This is story of my introvert friend. He liked one girl living next door. So he would go to knock on her door and ask for sugar for his coffee every single day. That was going on for month or so. Then one day, he had a fever, so he stayed in the bed and didn't go. On that evening the girl came to knock on his door, because she was waiting for him excited and he wasn't comming. As an reason to visit him she asked for coffee, that she ran out. They are happily married ever after. (funny part of the story, the guy was actually working in sugar distribution company)
Sounds like a Disney cartoon movie...
Literally the girl next door lol
Could make a good lame chick flick from this story
What a fairytale 😂😂😂
When the guy didn't show up, she went to get honey from Chad.
@@dylanrichardson3405 A fckn Lame ass Movie for kids type shit! 😴
As an introverted man, I've always had quiet confidence so I never felt the pressure to prove myself to men or women. I was a bit of a late bloomer when it came to attraction women but it was a huge blessing in disguise because being alone made me more comfortable in my own skin and allowed me to just be 100% authentic. It got to a point where when I would reveal to women some of my awkward interests and hobbies such as wrestling/WWE, I would get great responses because I wasn't ashamed and those women would usually become interested in that thing.
Sounds like you’ve got it going on! This is great.
I can relate to this a lot lol
I can relate! I’ve been to Meetups where I do things out of my norm, but the chemistry between all of us feels so instant real that I don’t feel uncomfortable (such as dancing and Karaoke)
What about a shy guy?
grown man who enjoys watching almost naked strong man prance around in a ring to pretend fight.
I've been introverted pretty much my whole life. When I was younger, there were people who'd pity me about it, and come across as though they think they're better than me. I didn't know how to articulate my feelings about it then, but now I say that it's condescending. Looking back, I was actually just fine. I like to talk, but I don't let out every mundane thought in my head. I like to go places, but I'm never one of those people who's never home unless they're sleeping.
Love this, I’m the same way!
Same I have a younger coworker who’s like a little brother and he likes to talk smack sometimes 😂 (not in a mean way more playful) but I just ignore sometimes but other people think I’m not standing up for myself like I’m weak when In reality I like being stoic and am too mature to talk like my younger bro so I just laugh. I used to have a brother and he died so it affects the way I treat younger men.
Appreciated hearing your insights; thanks for sharing!
Same here, also I have a successful career in sales although I constantly hear sales people should be bubbly extroverts. Sales numbers don’t lie though.
Ive spent the last six months going through a brutally depressive separation from my wife. This channel has helped me to realize how complacent I've been. That I've always had great qualities within me that I've hidden away for years. Courtney, you're doing a fantastic job at helping people with problems they weren't even aware they had. Keep up the fantastic work. I've found it liberating and extremely encouraging.
I feel you brother, i had so many negative thoughts looping in mu mind for years until i slowly addressed them through help with therapy and i realizrd that i actully have amazing traits and that brings another sense of worth
That’s how I came across her videos(glad I did)Iv been doing some self improvement, becoming a better version of myself. Iv been going to separation also and realized I had lost myself. I had those good qualities hidden somewhere and now it’s time to bring them back to the surface. Her videos have been helping.
As a fairly introverted guy, a big struggle for me is that almost all of my hobbies/interests are male-dominated or relatively isolated (hard to meet new people while doing them). So while I do leave my apartment several times a week (a lot for an introvert like me), I rarely run into new women, which is why it can be difficult to make connections. Ultimately I've decided to just bite the bullet and force myself to cold approach if I see someone attractive in public, since it might be my only chance.
Most of the time, it is, so as a former extrovert who lost the ability to interact properly (or maybe I never was an extrovert, but either way, I'm on your side now lol) the best I can say is that when it comes to asking someone out, I would say, pretend you're in someone else's body when you do it (and ONLY when you ask her out, not a moment before or a moment after) and drive it like you stole it, say what's on your mind, which is that you'd like to ask her on a date. And if she says no, it doesn't affect you, because it's not your body that you're in atm.
Honestly, this is probably shit advice, but I'm going to try it out
I’m with you there! I too am introverted, and almost never had any luck with woman at work and college. I am deathly afraid to go to bars out of fear of being rejected. Honestly, I would love for someone to set me up with a girl. I’ve dropped hints and even flat out asked but nobody wants to; although I’m not sure if it’s because they can’t or they won’t. I just might use the cold approach too, but then there is the fear of rejection.
Do you have one friend with a similar challenge? It is far easier to approach women as someone else's wingman - and it is a great way to build your confidence approaching on behalf of your friend. You can make a pleasant opening, compliment the guy and ask if she would like to meet him (and if she says no, she did not reject you!). Then maybe your buddy can do the same for you. It is a lot easier to speak to someone who has expressed a willingness to speak with you. Also, it is an easier way to face rejection since it is split between the interested guy and the wingman who did not do a great job(!) - a failed approach can be a good laugh after too
@@dgwaters I am also very introvert… but woman find me a very beautifull men , I got a lot of attention… so much at the point I become more and more distance .. and don’t feel the need to approach , it’s hard to explain… maybe of to many options , u got selective, until I see a full 10 and still get fear of rejection… it’s weird… but what I can say no matter how good looking u are , a girl will rarely approach the men.. it’s a bridge to far.. but yeah if u want less risk of rejection , u have to wait on her invitation by her body language and eye contact.. cold approaches and u never get eye contact it’s hard. U are better of with a group date..
@@averymason7073 I wish! All of my friends are currently in LTRs
In regards to the Alpha/Beta issue I had a funny story. A coworker rode along with me on my route for training in case I got sick or whatever. This grown man felt the need to tell me about his sexual conquests, how his nickname was Romeo, how he stood up to bouncers at a club and they cowered. On and on and on about these unbelievable stories that don’t fit with his character. The one phrase that constantly kept playing in my mind was, “A lion never feels the need to tell everyone else in the jungle that he’s a lion.” Plain and simple. I’m a lion, I’m a lion, I did this, I can do that. Needless to say, it was a painful awkward drive.
That's hilarious
He was a true ALPHA MALE. dont you dare mess with him
Lions don't even live in a jungle.
He most likely made it all up.
Be vulnerable but not emotional.
Meaning don't tell her what makes You sad or angry because You might start crying after opening Your deep issues and past traumas and that's not what women want to hear.
Gotcha.
So be vulnerable as in - act like everything is okay and assure to her that everything is fine. 👍
For introverted men, try going to the bookstore. Since inward things give me energy, I like going places where I can be myself, be curious, and pick up something that will help me to think deeply and think often.
Yes I like to smell wonderful flowers at the maize garden. Mmmm yess that aroma smell. 😤
Strike up a conversation with all the women you can, you will get a feel for it. Its just conversation,remember that. You don't need a goal or a specific intent, just be confident and let it flow. You will leave a better impression if the vibes your giving off aren't goal oriented and ask open ended questions.
With regards to the discussion on experience, I was too scared to date for a long time because my impression was that guys had no patience for a girl with no sexual experience. The fear of, *ehem*, not knowing what to do and having the most embarrassing situation of my life was too much for me, so I never went out, and I avoided guys I found attractive.
Cut to: April 2021, I'm British, so we're still locked down (for the most part), and all my friends at this point are online introverted discord nerds. And that's where I met my first ever boyfriend (I know, cringy, right? Lol). I was 23, he was 28, he was a close friend who was more nervous with women than I was with men (which is saying a lot). It was genuinely the greatest comfort he could've given me that he was as nervous and confused about intimacy as I was. It was and still is about discovering each other (as Courtney says), not "being good". Celebrated our first anniversary last week, and going all the stronger
So I hope that's a comfort to guys out there, there's women out there who need someone like you, and the women who don't don't change that
'Don't pretend to be someone you're not in order to get someone to like you' -- great advice! Thanks for this video!
10:06: This is why we love Courtney. She’s sympathetic and relatable.
Yeah, I love her sense of empathy.
Amazingly, she was raised by a single mom who, apparently, was not a bitter shrew because she taught her daughter to respect men.
Yes I totally understand this, I’ve always been told that I have a quiet confidence about myself. You don’t always have to be the loudest person in the room or chase women to get attention, I think as long as your genuinely kind & down to earth women will naturally gravitate themselves toward you. You kind of become mysterious I guess. It also helps if your handsome, in shape, dress & smell nice.
The problem with dating as an introvert is that because introverts tend to like their alone time and rarely go out, it's difficult to connect with other introverts because you won't have the opportunity to meet these types of people if you're just sitting at home. Maybe online dating would be better than in-person interaction, but again, many introverts might not even be willing to create an online dating profile, it's a catch-22.
From what I hear, Instagram is the worlds largest unofficial dating website. So maybe if you have online "friends" on there that might be a subtle way to go about it. I'm introverted and selectively social, but I've had success on there. Something for you to think about.
Very terrible advice. Apps like IG and Twitter ARE NOT for dating. If anything I'm cautious of when I receive friend request from random people on either of those apps. I'm also an introvert myself and I rarely go out but Instagram have a lot ppl who run scams and if it's not a scam, those IG models are either escorts or OF secks workers.
I met another introvert, although it was through a discord server where such people are more likely to spend their time. They live across the country though, so it's hard. Still worth it though imo because we have so much in common and talk to each other every day, something I never felt with anyone else.
Exactly how I feel. I'm introverted but make a lot of friends, but I always let the friendships come to me and never pursue them. I see plenty of beautiful women, but never get the urge to ask them out. Not because I'm afraid of unconfident, I just don't naturally draw myself to people.
Nice looking girls have showed interest in me in the past but I'm shy, insecure, and on top of that my sister is always putting me down! I have very few friends and acquaintances therefore the only message I get and gets reinforced often is, I'm a failure!
It is difficult to get out of this vicious cycle for me it is!
As an introvert, the biggest thing I learned to do was to own my introvertedness and turn it into an asset. Sometimes people feel the pressure of feeling like they need to fill every second with conversation or feel like they have to put on a performance. If you try to play the extrovert, it's not going to come off as authentic, so don't do it. Introversion is misunderstood a lot, and carries a bit of a negative connotation. What I found is that a woman appreciates when you ask her questions, listen, and simply allow her to express herself. She'll like that you had the ability to recall points of conversation that she made, or that you are observant about your surroundings and make a comment about something that she may not notice, etc. She'll view you as thoughtful and perceptive.
Statistics show that being an introvert is NOT an asset
@@Justforthefifteen it is an asset if you'll embrace it and learn how to use it to your advantage
@@ktrickmusik595 Guys, it's not that complicated. Introvertedness can be an asset, if you have looks, it's a detriment if you're ugly.
You have to be like in the top 3% of personality wise of men to get females legit attracted to you based on that only anyways... It's not as big of a flaw as you think
Great talk! I also want to point out "Actions speak louder than words." That's true, yes. But I also want to add that there are people who can lie with their own actions. To me, those are lies that speak louder than words.
I do what Courtney mentioned, smile, and look away, and don't keep that look too long. Eyes are so important. She has to have that look like she likes him. My older sister is really good at getting a man to notice her that she likes him. She gave me some advice and men approach me more. She gets approached a lot.
Yes, no free attention but definitely smile so that you appear friendly and approachable. Good lol
🙌🏼 thanks for sharing this Courtney! It’s so true!
Very true. I would like to add that a lot of men would love it when women would be a little more tenacious in repeating those signs because many times they fly right over our heads. ( we can be dense like that ) Doesn't mean we're not interested , we just need some repeating to get aware and then react to it.
1. She gives you a lap dance in a strip club, and she doesn't work there.
2. She introduces you to a wedding planner on your first date.
3. She causally brings up the topic of baby names and is curious about your personal preferences.
4. She wants to meet your parents after you engage in small talk with her about the weather.
These are the kinds of subtle clues that an autistic introvert like me could pick up on if we were paying close attention. I remember when I was younger, like 18 or 20, and there was a woman I was interested in. I was sitting in a chair and she was on a bean bag chair. And we talked for hours about different things. Later she tells me that she was giving me all sorts of hints that she wanted me to join her on the bean bag chair. She asked if she should have just grabbed me and pulled me to her. I said, yes. Then I was puzzled as to why she would ask such silly question.
Bang on!. Am in the same boat. I have had a few women friends from my younger years tell me later in life that I missed all & every hint that they were interested in me years ago. The standard flirting cues just don't stick or make sense. I'm not ignoring them, it just simply doesn't register as such..... very frustrating. A unambiguous, direct approach is definately preferred.😉
Something my mum once told me that as always stuck with me is that the fun is in learning how to please your partner and teaching them how to please you not so much about how many people you have been with. Which I've always taken to mean that when you are with someone new you are both as experienced as each other because you are learning each other together which I think is a nice way to think of it personally
Everything after your first is chasing the dragon.
Agreed, no labels. "It's not who I am underneath, but what I do that defines me."
All people are somewhat attracted toxicity until you learn more about yourself.
Be yourself
Focus on yourself
Respect yourself
Take shit from no one
Enjoy being happy vs giving into your desires
Stay positive
Courtney is a boss!!
How to tell if she likes you; “if she likes you, you'll know.” 😅 great 👍 glad I found that out
Well three major ways to know is eye contact, the girl pointing her body in your direction or trying to get close to you, and she will start to mirror you or find everything you say funny and interesting
Once you learn that men are overt and women are covert, you have to start paying attention to what is going on that isn't being made public or obvious
Whenever I hear "if she likes you, you'll know" this comes down to body language. And believe me being the socially awkward kid who lacked body language, I had to study really hard to get a good grip on it. But a friend once shared a perspective with me that I thought was very true. When ppl exhibit certain body languages towards us, that actually emits emotions inside us. So when a person has uncomfortable body language, then by proxy they make us uncomfortable. We also have that same effect on ppl, if we have positive body language, then we can make the person feel positive. Now heres the thing. Feelings are a tricky thing. How can you tell which feelings you should ignore such as approach anxiety and which feelings you should listen to? I hope I can answer this question. If you have a fear thinking about approaching a woman, that is just approach anxiety, you can get over that. But if you actually walk up to a woman, talk to her, get a couple of sentences in and for some reason you feel uncomfortable and awkward there, then very highly likely she's exhibiting uncomfortable body language meaning she doesn't want you there. In this instance listening to your feelings is beneficial. I would suggest you read up on a lot of body language and start practicing it in your everyday life.
@@LatimusChadimus I honestly think this dynamic needs to change. Man or woman, both need to start being active with their dating lives and let the other person know they're interested. But because this is how the dynamics are setup by society, here we are.
@@GregXHunterz true but if you think back to what they call evolutionary psychology, a woman has to protect herself which is why they are covert. Men are overt because they have things to do and need to get it taken care of
Ladies, asking someone for an interview is WAY less scary than cold approaching a woman. I promise you. Reallly like your duo action in these videos. You strengthen each others communication. Result : good information in a fluent style. Well done !
When cold approaching for an interview you have a non-threatening excuse to approach, the interaction is centered around the objective. When you cold approach it's implied or at the least will be interpreted as, you wanting to sleep with her. The rejection is a lot more personal because a rejection here means they don't like or aren't interested in what you personally are.
For example I have no problem telling a pretty girl she dropped her winter gloves on the ground but I would definitely be nervous if I was trying to make small talk with the hopes of getting her number. Nonetheless I really do appreciate their acknowledgment of the difficulty of approaching !
@@Adam-ui3yn trust me, there are many reasons for a rejection some could be as ridiculous as you looking like her terrible ex. Never take it personal. In statistics, the bigger your sample size, the more accurate you’re at getting to the population/reality size. 10/10 guys still get rejections here and there so don’t let rejection stop you, keep going at it and you will score big. So many 10/10 girls don’t want 10/10 guys. It’s usually the 6s that are ridiculously vague on their expectations
I’m a classic introvert and found my way through photography and cinematography. Sometimes it’s easier to communicate through a visual means and I’ve found a lot of women like the quiet brooding artist 😂
I'm an artist too, and have had a long string of successes in this field such as won many awards, works in important collections and even in museums. My point is that none of this ever held the least bit of interest for women to my knowledge. If anything, this artistic interest has mostly been a detriment to my social life.
@@KpxUrz5745 its your personality then, not your interest in the arts
@@basedviet I see no factual basis for you to reach that conclusion. That seems to suggest that most or all women are automatically very interested in artists. I maintain that most women view artists as likely to not be good "providers" in terms of career success. (That is not my issue, as I am quite wealthy).
you are my evidence. you can have all the money in the world and still be single if you have a lame personality. my wife was specifically looking for an artist when we started dating
@@KpxUrz5745
@@KpxUrz5745 my wife specifically wanted to marry an artist but also recognized many are “starving artists” who wouldn’t be able to provide. If you are as successful as you say you are, it’s not your line of work holding you back and you should do some introspection as to what is actually holding you back.
Hallee: Courtney's MVO (most valued opionaire)
She’s cute
I think it's a tie between Hallee, Maria, Lina and Alexa!
🙌🏼🤍
@@jmwoods190 yes, her friends are great, but I only said it this way because she has appeared on the majority of the recent videos
@@LatimusChadimus Fair point, and I agree with you in this context, though we'll see with the other 3 as time goes on! 😉
The easiest way to tell if a girl likes me is when she sends she ask me if I have Cash App, or redirects me to another site.
🤣
Courtney and Hallee - my favorite dating advice duo!
Keep up the the good work ladies!!
No
Honestly when you do these videos with your friends you seem even more comfortable and there's a lot more laughter which is enjoyable
Courtney, I'm absolutely floored that you took my question (alpha males vs. beta males). Thank you so much!
As someone who is introverted and used to considor themselves painfully shy I appreicatiate Courtney & Hallee's advice. Part of my problem is I spend some of the week working from home and some days don't see anyone to talk to but I when I'm in the office and I speak to my colleagues face to face I check that I'm doing things like looking into peoples eyes.
Time to find/expand hobbies outside of your house 😉
I love the general empathy you have and the advice you gave was really solid. Thanks for helping out us men get better at understanding women and this dating thing
Best advice I can give is to get comfortable in your own skin.
Just be the best version of you, you can be and have passions and goals you are persuing.
Just get better day by day 😅
Thanks for this Courtney & Hallee! I would consider myself to be quite introverted and I have had (and still do to some degree) have a scarcity-mindset which is hard to get out of, even though I recognize it now. I totally agree with you both when it comes to how someone comes across, and that you have to be comfortable being ‘You’ and not trying too hard to impress. Impressing is one thing, but trying too hard is another!
Allowing your vulnerabilities to come out when you are asked CAN build trust I think; you are coming across as being genuine because there’s a very good chance the person asking can be trust-worthy too, so I myself would totally do that!
I think if somebody never really tries to get to know you on a deeper level like that then they aren’t really worth it, so don’t just announce anything anyway!
On another note I’d like to add, I think you have to ‘build attraction’ or a woman will only see you as a Friend and nothing more! I’ve made that mistake too many times (because I never knew how to) and then I would just get friend-zoned!
Being vulnerable is allowing someone to see your wounds without the pain taking you over still being able to keep emotional stability showing that it doesn't control you or Define you only that it has helped to grow you and that you wish to show that to someone whom you trust
That's showing your fears, that's not literally being vulnerable. Expressing your concerns is not being vulnerable, if your actually scared and need comfort from your wife, SHE WILL LEAVE YOU! However, if she's need comfort IT'S EXPECTED OF YOU. It's a tough thing to be a man. As a man only one person got your back and that's God. I would say yourself, but even that creature will fail you at times. I'm starting to realize that the next time I see a woman in emotional travail, she'll need to help herself.
13:50 I remember an old relationship where I listened to her complain about her previous relationships, ex-boyfriends, friends talking behind her back, family problems, etc, and I'd give her the time of day to vent out, get angry or cry.
But the first time I ever showed an annoyance over a customer at work I was given the response, "Why are you telling me this? This isn't my problem. Man up." I didn't shout or cry or get angry, I was just annoyed. Nope. Not allowed to talk about it. Being annoyed was enough for me to be questioned if I'm actually a man
Hallee is definitely my most favorite guest you have
I'm like a total roll of the dice, I can be either super extroverted, or really introverted, honestly I'm not one or the other, I do have the ability to muster up real confidence relax and talk to girls, but moments like those are pretty rare for me
If you study something,
Whatever it is.
You can become something.
Its called mastering the basics.
And feel free..oh my goodness that has everything to do with living an amazing life with that amazing person 😎
For all of the guys that never had a girlfriend, if you are going out dating, use that experience to get practice talking to women and building up your communication skills so that when it is time to go deeper into having a relationship with a lady, stress on the word lady, neither of you will care that you have no experience
8:04 I wanna add some 2 cents to the introverted part. I think there is a difference between being shy and being introverted. I'm an introverted person myself but I have never shied away from approaching a woman I find attractive (mostly in socially acceptable environments but even outside of that I'd still do it if the situation is right.). Also coming from the experience of going out to places that are interesting to me, these are my experiences so far. I can sometimes socialize in groups and make myself known, but if there isn't a click between me and a group I would find myself in my own company alone so it feels like I'm back to square one. In those situations, learning how to approach strangers you haven't met for the first time is very useful in helping to make new friends and finding dates. It doesn't have to be a group of people, just one person who you can really click with can make a difference in your day. Also my approach to cold approach is very different. I basically live my life and make it a point to go outside if there are things to do, and if I happen to meet a woman that I'm interested in, I consider both the environment and her body language and would strike up a conversation and would continue that convo if she's comfortable.
Also if you're someone who doesn't have friends and want to make new friends while doing things you like, social events are for you. They're socially acceptable environments and it's more easier to talk to people even if you're just some guy in an area by yourself. And the best part is, if you go to more social events you get to meet different kinds of people which can really give you that exposure if you take advantage.
@@urlauburlaub2222 wtf are you say??? Lol
That last paragraph you give out some good advice.
"The girl that goes after that one type of man, is not the girl for you."
That would be 100% of women.
I'm an introvert and I don't go out per se. I stay home working on my music mostly. If I do go out, its really just to perform. Even then, I am concentrated on my music. During a break, I would get a drink and chat with a few friends, but I don't pay attention to what's going on around me. I don't get approached by women so I don't talk to any. Currently I'm working on re-recording my songs and preparing for a Baltic tour. I was with a woman for 15 years but she passed away and since then I have just been a professional bachelor and I feel that I will always be one.
The low quality women did not like your comment!
Being an Introvert is either THE best or THE worst trait, depending on if you recognize your own strengths and weaknesses or not. One advantage extroverts have is that they can "fake it until they make it" a lot better than we can, but in the end that is not really an advantage because they lose who they are along the way. Also, us introverts reflect so much on us and the world around us so we can face harsh realities a lot easier. Also Halle seems to totally be my type
They give solid advice. Their understanding of relationships is quite impressive. The wisdom they carry admirable. Their calm nature and the laid back way they communicate makes the information easy to understand and take in. They carry an old soul you can see within their wisdom. You rarely see this combination of an old soul within a young energetic spirit. I've watched four or five video's now, and they're telling you right. If every man took their advice the world would be a better place, it's good advice take it. To the people who raised these young ladies, you did a phenomenal job!!!
105,000%
Even though she's helped me with fashion and a skin care routine, I'm still here supporting this channel with views 👍 and lots of algo boosting comments. This channel is great, and helpful so here i am scrolling to help more haha
BETA!
🤣🤣🤣
the title implies this is advice for men. I think the discussion applies to both sexes. this one was about how to behave well and recognize respectful behavior. I can apply this kind of advice. that's in high contrast to the joke "what women want from men" shopping lists in other vids and dating profiles 😎
@@Dasher49225 I'm as serious as a heart attack. I'm a single parent with a 15 year old son who's beginning to ask questions about girls and relationships. So I believe I could have him watch these ladies and he'd actually learn something. I'm 42, I date women my own age, and trust me 90% of women I've experienced in their 40s are far more immature than those two young ladies. Again, the wisdom they carry at their age is impressive to me. If you think otherwise, I love to hear why?
This Q&A was a lot of fun to watch. As a reasonably introverted single guy in his 50's, I think I learnt a fair bit from watching this. Thanks, girls
Hallee is an American treasure!!
She is! 🏆
BETA!
treasure hunt
@@Justforthefifteen D-bag comment. You have absolutely no idea the context the OP directed the comment. If you watched earlier segments with Courtney and Hallee, Hallee was kinda eye candy and didn’t offer much. She’s made improvements and interacts with solid advice from a different perspective now. Kudos to her growth. Just because you think a poster is “simping” doesn’t mean they are. Get over yourself bro.
@@Justforthefifteen says the real beta. If someone uses the alpha beta terms are the most insecure and weak minded
My personal opinion is that if you're relaxed...not hurrying love...not forcing love...having confidence with a positive attitude...not acting desperate with a scarcity mind- set...All of this equals being = Being YOURSELF!!!...Things will happen to you at the moment that you least expect it to!... Remember that...Other people see us much differently on the outside than we see ourselves! We're all very hard on ourselves and sometimes settle & sell ourselves" short!" So, give it time and when fate has it, then, you can open up to somebody and show them the " inside" of who & what you are!... Let ..." nature" take its course...
For me to make myself comfortable with being uncomfortable, in the final minutes of my morning shower I switch the water from warm to COLD and I stand in it and I remain calm and I let myself enjoy how uncomfortable it is. It is getting to the point where switching to cold water is easy, this will make all other uncomfortable things in life easier.
It is a great mastery of self control In my book if you can suppress the flight instinct in all situations like that, For me working outdoors I have developed this with the weather initially, Getting hit by a rain storm while trying to complete your job, its freezing and your fingers are going numb but a moment to pause, breath and absorb the discomfort and tendency to run is very satisfying and has allowed me to integrate this into other areas of my life where my introvert tendencies tend to rule, and my OCD, impatience for idiots etc.
Key insights:
💡 Stand out by being yourself and doing what you like to do and what you want to do, and they'll naturally attract you.
😕 If she texts you first or gives you more in the conversation, she likes you, but if she's very dry and ghosts you, obviously she doesn't really like you.
👀 Actions speak louder than words, so watch what people do and not what they say.
🏋♂ Go to places that are interesting to you, like a gym or a coffee shop, to meet people who share your interests and values.
💕 Vulnerability can deepen a connection, but it's important to approach it in a way that shows emotional control and strength.
🌱 Putting effort into yourself and your life is the baseline for attracting the right people.
🚩 It depends on the girl and her own experiences, everyone has different versions of what red flags are.
TLDR: Being authentic, pursuing your interests, and putting effort into yourself is the best way to attract the right people into your life.
1. 00:00 🔍 Women give subtle cues like smiling and being more outgoing when they like someone, and it's important to pay attention to these hints.
1.1 Women are open to giving guys who aren't their type a chance, and standing out involves being open-minded and not being narrow in what they're looking for.
1.2 Be yourself and do what you like, and you will naturally attract people who like you for who you are.
1.3 Women give subtle cues like smiling and being more outgoing when they like someone, and it's important to pay attention to these hints.
1.4 If a girl acts nervous around you, gives you attention, and texts you first, she probably likes you, but if she's dry in conversation and ghosts you, she doesn't like you.
2. 03:17 👍 Labeling people as alpha or beta is cringe and immature, and if you have to tell people that you are something, you just aren't.
2.1 The speaker and the mature women agree that labelling people as alpha or beta is cringe and they don't take it seriously.
2.2 If you have to tell people that you are something, you just aren't, and going around calling people "beta males" is immature and embarrassing.
3. 05:17 🔍 Pay attention to actions, not just words, and avoid the cycle of breaking up and getting back together with an ex, especially if there was cheating.
3.1 Breaking up and getting back together with an ex is not a good idea, especially if there is cheating involved, as it often leads to a continuous cycle of breaking up and getting back together.
3.2 Actions speak louder than words, so pay attention to what someone does rather than what they say, and don't talk yourself out of it just because you want something.
4. 07:21 🔍 Rekindling a relationship after a breakup can work out, introverted guys should push themselves out of their comfort zone to meet people and date, rejection is tough but joining groups can help.
4.1 Rekindling a relationship after a breakup can work out, especially if both parties have matured.
4.2 Introverted guys who don't have a thriving social life should force themselves to get out of their comfort zone in order to meet people and date.
4.3 Push yourself out of your comfort zone by doing one small thing every day, go to places that interest you, and join a community or group where you can naturally meet people with similar interests.
4.4 Rejection is tough, but joining groups can help, and lack of experience may not be a major issue in dating.
5. 10:41 🔍 Guys should be honest about their lack of dating experience, and true vulnerability in a relationship is about being able to talk about emotions and trusting someone with past experiences and fears.
5.1 It's okay to be honest about your lack of dating experience if it comes up naturally in conversation, but there's no need to announce it.
5.2 Guys often feel like they can't express their emotions in a relationship because they think women get turned off by vulnerability, but in reality, they may not be truly vulnerable.
5.3 True vulnerability is not about emotional instability or dumping traumas on someone, but rather about being able to talk about emotions and trusting someone with past experiences and fears.
6. 12:56 🔍 Sharing controlled vulnerability and opening up confidently can deepen connections and progress relationships, while emotional instability is unattractive to women.
6.1 Check out the video for a better explanation, as it's difficult to articulate, but the main point is that showing emotion doesn't necessarily mean crying or being angry.
6.2 Sharing vulnerability and opening up in a controlled and confident manner can deepen connections and progress relationships, while lack of control and emotional instability are unattractive to women.
7. 14:15 👫 Focus on an abundance mindset, be present, work on confidence, lower expectations, and redefine success to feel more confident and less rejected in dating interactions.
7.1 The speaker gives advice to an outgoing person who has trouble dating and suggests that insecurity may be the issue.
7.2 Focus on having a mindset of abundance rather than scarcity when approaching women, and try to be present at the moment rather than worrying about potential rejection.
7.3 Invest in yourself and work on your own confidence and well-being in order to naturally attract the kind of people you want in your life.
7.4 Lower your expectations, focus on small steps, and change your definition of success to feel more confident and less rejected in dating interactions.
8. 17:18 🔍 Open communication and aligned values are key in a relationship, don't worry about lack of sexual experience.
8.1 The speaker discusses concerns about lack of sexual experience and whether it would be a red flag for a girl he likes but ultimately concludes that it depends on the individual and their perspective.
8.2 Experience does not always mean better, open communication and learning about each other is more important in a relationship.
8.3 Open communication and asking about her likes are important, finding someone with aligned values is key, and don't worry too much about inexperience.
48 laws of dating
Law number 1 Never trust a dating roach especially female ones.
I love that quote you said ( fool on one me shame of you , fool of me twice fool shame of me ) . So true
Mark Manson does a great job talking about vulnerability vs emotional vomit in his book “Models”
I still remember a time when I was walking with my family on a sidewalk in town, and a group of young women walked past us. One of them made eye contact and smiled at me, and, of course, I was too nervous and quickly looked away. I've always regretted that.
I'm an ambivert, I'm 29 years old and have never dated anyone at least in person. I'm completely dry and haven't even had my first kiss yet. I want to date badly but I'm not the kind of guy that would chase women like others would. Often I can't help but think this would make other women think I'm a red flag. I overthink a lot too and often have a hard time getting out of my own head thinking of countless scenarios of why I'd be a bad choice.
I take care of myself and have surrounded myself with good company most of my life. I've even often been told that I am attractive but I still have trouble attracting women
You could be expecting women to come up to you and show their attraction. So many women won’t show their attraction out of fear so their fight/flight response makes them appear shy. But some have a lot emotional trauma that there’s no shyness at all. Make the move. Attraction isn’t always at first sight. From what you said about yourself, many women will love you once they get to know you
@@kelvinjunior3359 I see, thanks for the info
@@kelvinjunior3359 most woman are showing their attraction.. how better u look, how more attention .. eye contact etc.. woman find me a very beautiful men , out of all the woman I encountered , I think 1 procent don’t display signs,. The rest alway want attention from me en starring to me , like I am micheal Jackson of that kind… And I am single.. I don’t approach the girls , I am happy alone.. the attention fills maybe. my short comings.. and most woman don’t approach no matter your looks.. but they always invite u to come over if they like your appearance… the ones who are smiling, u don’t get rejection
Being vulnerable is simply embracing the situations of your life and being okay with someone knowing about your true emotions. Sometimes it is just saying "I feel this way, ai don't like it" and maybe "I need this".
Can you have Hallee talk about her teeth whitening routine? Like damn, they're bright!
Just talk to your orthodontist
Brightest teeth literally in the world. Sunglasses required.
Can’t speak for her, but look into activated charcoal.
Great advice, especially for the Introvert question. Gotta get out there... It's something I'm currently trying to work on.
The part when you said I can't sit in my apartment and wait for a girl as I sit in my apartment doing exactly that made me lol😅
Agreed a true alpha male doesnt put anyone down he tries to rise them up . Awesome video ladies😉💎
When I'm around somebody I like or am really attracted to, my eyes water uncontrollably. Then my nose starts to run. It's embarrassing.
When that happens to me, and no matter where I am, I pull out an onion and knife and start peeling. Perfect excuse for the nose and eyes 😜
I like being an artsy, intellectual introvert, so I'm sticking with that 🙂
Ya know what, I’m artsy and an introvert too!
HALLEE is back 😊
🙌🏼
I’ve had women come on really strong when they like me and that’s easy to tell, but when you get used to that, it’s harder to tell if the more reserved ones are interested. I basically end up with very masculine, direct women instead of the more feminine frame I would prefer. Im working on learning the more subtle signals so I don’t miss out just because she’s shy.
I was introverted. So one day, I just walk up to a girl and tell her that she is beautiful. I have been married to her for 17 years.
Damn fr? 😐
Lol. Wonder how crushing it would be to fail
Good one. If its clear, they like you, if you are confused or don’t know they dont. Yup, you feel the connection. It’s easy to see. It’s all about becoming someone capable to know what they want and going for it no matter how many times you put yourself together and get up. In other failed or misses in trying to find her in other people. Emotional resilience and knowing what you truly love and deserve
Vulnerability was a totally new concept for me awhile back. I opened up to a girl about a dark past after she told me to stop holding back! She then wanted to know more details about it and then I made her feel more special by giving her something made for me, which she still has to this day!
For her birthday, I have an idea to play our favorite song on my guitar!
Oof I could never. Too much risk involved. Best of luck to you.
@@LifelsGreat with risk comes reward. I'm nervous as hell doing it lol but I can't let it base my actions
Love!!!!
@@CourtneyRyan ever since I found out about my liver diagnosis a few months ago, I have been wanting to do anything and everything with no regret as if tomorrow never comes...
@@tommygunn6901 yeah but the ratio of a person using it against you v someone who won’t is overwhelmingly bad.
Saturday night 30 April 2022. Congrats on 309K subscribers. Thanks for what you and Hallee do for the manosphere! Take care and all the best.
I think the strangest thing I get on dating apps, or sometimes even in person, ive been told on multiple occasions that the girl thought I was too good for them... Which I have never understood, ive always seen myself as an equal to everyone, so im always shocked when thats said to me. I did have 1 girl explain to me that my profile was really open, showing all my interests in the few photos I have, which I guess is a hard thing to do for others.
Your the "nice guy." The one they friend zone and make jump through thousands of hoops dangling the used kitty in front of you as bait. And you'll jump through them thinking you'll finally get it, but she's just using you for validation and attention. If she had actual interest in you she'd give it up for the price of a drink or free, like she did for Chad or Tyrone her entire life. They only make the "friend zone" guys they have no interest in jump through the hoops.
@@funkfarmer7125 that's the reason, that when I ask what they want, if they say friend, im gone.
One piece of advice I have for introverts is when I was working retail it really, really helped me out with talking to strangers. You have to, but that kinda gets rid of the pressure, you know? Like you know that no one is going to find it unexpected, because it's literally your job so it's not weird at all. I used my cashier job at CVS to practice eye contact, and small talk and stuff like that. Idk I just found that to be helpful. Even just doing your job like walking around and asking if people need help with anything is a great way to get comfortable with the concept of approaching strangers.
Just don't actually hit on people and it makes for good practice for introverts. Your brain will find it much easier because of the repetition. Also a little tip I still need to work on, but when someone tells you their name, really try to make a mental note of it. People will be pleasantly surprised by "Hey, [name], how are you today?" the next time you see them. Normally I'll forget and after the convo I'll be like "Oohh yeaa, they told me their name... what was it?"
Watching this is giving me a good perspective because those people on podcasts that act a certain way “alpha male” are those trying to appeal to the majority of the men who have bad experiences with women and there’s many factors that play a part in why there’s a lot of “bimbos”. This video makes me feel like there are good respectful ,mindful ,caring ,understanding , and acknowledging women out there. And luckily I’ve met mine already and been nothing but happy that our relationship isn’t painted like how normal society does
Give a little more time, the happiness comes to a crashing halt. Better to be prepared than to be naive. And I know your saying "not me, this one is different." Just know every single guy destroyed in a divorce said the same words.
@@funkfarmer7125 This really isn't true since there are solid relationships out there, but unless the dude is a 7/10 in looks or has one hell of a funny stand out personality, he is not going to have much or any positive natural female attraction, and he will be forced to be an atm machine for good looking women like 98% of the dudes in the comments
What I just heard is open up and be vulnerable but not in a way she doesn’t think is cute or sexy. Yep, I’ll get right on that.
1:39 that's because in the back of your mind you want to impress that person and that becomes your focus in which you tend to lose your awareness and act a little bit differently. It's normal and it is definitely a good sign to pay attention for
BETA!
Stand out,and you shall be...Outstanding!
I thought I could go up to a girl in public but I got this feeling of fear and I didn’t do it, I guess I’m just afraid of embarrassing myself I’m introverted but when I get to know someone I’m the complete opposite Girls are difficult it’s tough out here but I’m going to keep trying 😂😂
I’m an introvert so this video will come in handy
Did you see last week's video?!? Please do so! Twas about how introverts are very attractive
Oh, and share it with your friends
🙌🏼🤍
Love Hallee’s input on these advice videos. Both of you ladies rock it and give sound advice
You and Hallee make a great team and these combo videos are great!
Combo videos? What you think this is, McDonalds?
@@Justforthefifteen You're right. I withdraw calling these ladies a combo and would name them a dynamic duo!
Nah she's better off combining with FitXFearless
for love is joy the love has been given do not let it pass you love is patient it is waiting for you
When you meet a new girl, talk to her the way you would with a guy. That's the key.
been doing it my whole life. still alone. doesn't work. stop being a Clown
As an Introvert(INTJ) , I click on every single video that has "introvert" in the title. Thank you!
That first answer to the first question is good. Going after someone/people that you're not their type makes me think of the definition of insanity. Doing the same thing over and over expecting different results. If you're not someone's type that's ok, you'll find someone who you will fit their type.
That's not something you know upfront. You have to approach all the girls you can regardless. You are going to get rejected and that's what men are AFRAID of
Totally, what I loved learning from bdsm was the open communication and getting to truly know another. It’s so so so useful.
The Alpha Beta dynamic is definitely more of a male oriented concept. I think it's hard for women to understand a dynamic that isn't important in female society. 🤔 To me, Alpha is being a masculine monster that is NOT toxic, a warrior mindset, a protector, a provider for my family and friends, and a safe place for a woman to be her feminine self without judgment, pressure, and expectations (unless they are mutually agreed expectations). SHOW who you are through your body language and actions. Don't talk about it. Be about it. "Don't talk about being a better man. Be a better man. - Marcus Aurelius.
Also, I practice being emotionally open and vulnerable 100% of the time. How can men truly connect to women on an emotional level if we don't practice our emotional mastery everyday? We can't.
The alpha beta dynamic is bullshit.
Be yourself, that’s masculine
To share emotions with a woman is to share something intimate that makes you human and venerable in that moment only, and only she can see that side of you for a split second before you turn back on the strength. It's the warm and fuzzy that it provides and also sense of security that the same person can protect you if needed.
Honestly I’ve gotten to the point I could care less what they think. I’m not here to impress anyone. If you are interested you show me.
Amen brother, the vast majority of these broads deserve none our MEAT. Money energy attention and time. If they want it, they can prove to US why they deserve it. The groveling days are over. They don't want to be traditional women? Fine, then I don't have to be a traditional guy.
Yeah I use to be pretty awkward but I still consider myself an introvert. I started watching prank videos of guys that go up to people in college campuses. So one day I decided to do it to overcome this shyness and man it was scary but I did it and now I much more comfortable in social settings.
If you're at a bar she just wants a free drink.
Good point. Don't be so focused that it has to be her. If you're not her type, it's okay. There are probably women who like you but they are not your type.
Don’t be vulnerable to your girl, I had a friend who cried at his mom’s funeral and his girl lost attraction towards him.
Her loss, I'd say. She has no heart and likely would have been a major burden to his life instead of a wonderful compliment to his life
@@LatimusChadimus real men don’t cry
@@Justforthefifteen Tell yourself that when you lose a family member or friend who you're close with. Tell that to male actors who do that on camera. Who wants a girl with no sympathy for others' pain? I lost my dad years ago and I cried because that's the normal human reaction. Anyone who doesn't is 1) covering it up, 2) not close with anyone and lacking in emotional connections (or void of emotion at all) or 3) if you're a guy, you're not a real man in my book. Any one of these is no good. Some guys will do this even if nobody sees, doesn't make them any less human. If they're not real men to you, then we couldn't care less of such opinions.
NEVER fully open up to a woman. the second you do she loses all respect for you.
Thats load of horseshit
It's so beautiful to see a smiling shieldmaidens who give valauble advices.Thank you Courtney !
Love you guys making videos together🔥💯
Me too! ❤️
11:20 Do not make yourself vulnerable. Ever. All that accomplishes is it gives the woman, or whoever, something to use against you. The Miranda warnings were created for this very reason, albeit in a slightly different context. You have the right to remain silent. Use it
I totally agree, ever long-term successful marriage I've ever seen, 50+ years of marriage, the guy has NEVER told the woman his problems.
the only guys who notice the "obvious" are the chads and tyrones; for the majority of guys, we simply don't know and the high probability of pain and ridicule is not worth the low chance of dating
Yes.. I amma super chad.. girls like my apoeance and get to much of attention.. but believe I had many blue balls… point is if u are not dominance and start acting weak , u are out. No matter your looks. We only have more room for error and get girls faster in their comfort… but can screw it up big times and that stings
Great tips! Confidence is probably the #1 thing you’ll need before you approach any woman…
And have no agenda, just relax, and talk to her like a human being - because women are people, whether you choose to believe that, or not! Lol
But seriously, behave around her like you would with your friends, that way - she’ll let her guard down, and perhaps, let you get to know her!
Just remember, it’s your job to put her mind at ease, if you can do that - amazing things will start to happen!
Anyway, that’s my two cents.
-Carlos Verde - Dating Tips
Great as always, Carlos! 🤍
@@CourtneyRyan thanks! I appreciate that. 😁❤️
Your confidence is your looks so have good looks before you approach.
Hi, Courtney Ryan this is great I’ve been watching more videos like this daily and I’m not single but I make sure when I see the videos you make and Marni your personal wing girl videos I have probably have been learning more than I ever knew.
Here’s the thing about me.
1. I’m always clean cut have build-up in the arms and shoulders one tattoo plan to get more dye my hair, and have black earrings.
2. I have good hygiene, and very respectful.
Honest, Loyal, Caring, Dependable, Reliable, when I can be and Responsible.
3. Back in middle school I wanted more than a Relationship w/ the girls that friended me I think though I’d one some had relationships never told me I had to get the hint they did so I’d respect that others were single so I had no relationships til my 20’s I’m 25 now.
4. When I was younger I felt like there was something wrong me and there still is I don’t know what it is but now I had to find out why that was it was because I didn’t care enough about of who I was as myself as a kid u know his kids are supposed to have friends to hang out with after school in elementary and middle school never did and I just was isolated back then but now I’m not but due to my in-capability of hanging out w/ friends in high school wasn’t something I did I put all my time and energy into helping animals 7 in half years and then in my 7th year is when I then got into a film school locally in Sacramento I know great deal.
5. I got a lot girls these days and girls with developmental intellectual disabilities but then it’s because I do too.
6. I had to grow up not liking myself cause I knew I would get judged back in elementary school and pre-school so I never spoke had to learn sign language but I forgot about it everyday when I would get home I didn’t know how to communicate so I probably felt frustrated that I couldn’t get a syllable out not even a full sentence and me being delayed by my lack of speech made me not like myself which caused me to hit myself like my head and having a short fuse with how infuriating it was not to able to talk and would hit my head other times because having a disability with problems can cause problems.
7. I have over-come a lot of challenges and yet people would say I don’t look like I have a disability but I do.
8. I had many romances but I stopped that and then figured out that searching wasn’t in the cards and then I found out that putting myself out there meant getting more rejection but I didn’t need that since I had so much other things going on like back in high school romances then being single then making choices for myself that didn’t require anything about pursuing girls but then I finally stopped when I was 18-19 after high school and never went to college and went to a school for independence and things were not good friends making bulls-shit 89 % percent of them were not great so I had gotten a job through the program/school for independence then I didn’t have to see them then next min some guy I knew mentally in head out of whack I knew him way to well back in high school then he says he had a gun and find out he’s an avid shooter he wasn’t lying and I took that into consideration and seriousness and stopped going went back most of my friends still there drama and newbies drama I finally understood that some people can’t seem to figure out what to do so they create bull-shit but then I left and other program bullshit then went onto a film school been there for 4 yrs coming soon and now I feel I have something now I can do I want to do for a job but to do it myself be my boss through it and a musician and an artist.
Idk I’m a confident introvert. Only put myself out there if I feel you’re interesting. I’ve had girlfriends and idc how hot you are if you have no depth I’m not going to put time in. A lot of guys could do themselves a big favor by actually thinking about what they’re actually going after.
Yeah, people think I'm scared of rejection but I just don't find alot of women attractive.
so be vulnerable but neither one of you actually know what that means enough to even explain it. great stuff.
I wish a female would approach me & start conversations. I’m a quiet introvert who speaks when spoken to.
I’ve had quite a few (assumed) feminists say to me, how would you like it if a ton of women approached, catcalled and harassed you?
And I’m like- That would be nice.
@@americancapitalist9094 well I would only like it if the ones who where interested in me initiated conversations. That would make things easier for me as an introvert. Just not all the other things you listed here
Thats what strip clubs are for
Please that is always on men and that will never change I doubt
Your friend is cool. You should invite her more.
I am an introvert to a degree, my biggest issue is not having enough to say or know what topics to talk about, even approaching others is not my thing, also I have lots of anxiety.
So what advice would you have for me ?
Drugs. Lots of them
@@Justforthefifteen 😭
go gym.....
With your face, you can be funny as fuck with a very attractive personality and women would only ever use you for money.. Someone needs to be 100% real with you dude, and let you know you're wasting time looking for something natural
You're both so pretty and give great advice! Thanks!