*Bloodthirster:* "Blood for the blood god! Skulls for the skull thro- oh bloody hell, they've sorted their cardboard correctly, not a pizza box in sight... pack it up boys." *Herald:* "They've put lightbulbs in with standard glass." *Bloodthirster:* "SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE!"
When I'm trying to sleep tonight, I'll be lying there thinking about how the source of Khorne's perpetual rage is the fact that the inhabitants of the mortal realms aren't sorting their recyclable rubbish properly.
Skulls go on the Skull throne, and Blood is dedicated to the Blood God. Even Bloodthirsters understand the value of sorting items into their proper place.
"Look at the sky, it looks like a smashed cake! The gods are huffing bonkers! We need to dedicate some of our precious time to a futile and time consuming ritual."
Guilliman is kinda the last one to execute people for being bureaucrats. It's the inefficiency that offends him. So, methinks it'd be more like this: inquisitor: bureaucratic stuff Guilliman: Okay, but why isn't anything being done? ... Inquisitor: Alright, you got me. It's not just bureaucracy, it's mostly self-serving bullshit. Also, like half of them are conspiring to depose you. Guilliman: okay, kill them all
Since the Lion is here, I'd think the "kill'em all!", is more in his style. Bobby G is a little bit to diplomatic for this, I am afraid. Let the Beast do the dirty work
@Hohmann Transfer Window Washer I have seen a seemingly sudden and ridiculous number of these references pop up lately. Has TFS released some new abridged stuff or something?
@@JakeSmith-em5sh I'm going to have to admit to actively sowing some of these misplaced referencing seeds myself. No, they haven't, at least not to my knowledge. I simply find these 'skits' enjoyable. Also (again, for now), until body of 40k Lion lore grows sufficiently, I'm treating his return with more than a little bit of contempt, much like I did with Guilliman's. Hence the lackadaisical referencing. I am enjoying the deluge of new vids like this one, though. And this one specifically is extra good.
The cult leader suggesting sorting the rubbish into seperate bins as a solution to Chaos Warp Storms is ironically more sensible than anything the Imperial Ecclesiarchy has ever come up with. Truly, he is possessed of the wisdom of the God Emperor himself!
and then Roby G finally realizes the wiseman has been reading one of his brother's books again, the one that now wears spikey armour and has horns coming out the four sides of his head.
@@ezonplays2260 different nature of their failures. Magnus had a singly fantastic mistake that cascaded, Lorgar continually worked and sabotaged the purpose that they worked towards.
Imperial Priest - "We need to sort our rubbish into seperate bins" Guilliman - "YES, YES, OH BY MY FATHER YES!" *begins feverishly organising all bins in the imperium and drowns the Tyranids in plastic*
The guy Guilliman is talking to is an Administratum clerk, not a member of the Ecclesiarchy. But I guess the fact that it's hard to tell an accountant from a priest in the imperium is pretty funny too.
I really thought this would be the Vectron skit, with Roboute increasingly confused about why everyone keeps worshipping his father despite that being explicitly against his instruction.
I love the bluntness of it. "Yeah, I know this probably isn't going to work, but all signs point to our imminent death. So I figure we better try something."
I like to imagine that if the Peep Show characters were each a faction in 40K, Super Hans would be so much of a coke-snorting lunatic he'd make even the Drukhari uncomfortable.
The sorting begins, and the sister's faith in the task causes a miracle to occur that saves everybody's ass. Roboute is slack-jawed with a face of shock and disgust. While the Black Templars are screaming fanatical praises in the background.
I imagine the chaos equivalent is a Heretic Space Marine being told by a sorcerer to add more spikes and skulls to his armor. "You know, just look evil, n'shit..."
Oh, the "Vectron" sketch would also be fertile ground for Guilliman not quite understanding where the whole "worship the emperor like a god" thing came from.
The best part is that the guy sounds crazy out of context but in the situation you gotta admit he has a point and is probably right. This pretty much sums up the galaxy Guilliman woke up in. Where the crazy soothsayers are right at least ninety percent of the time no matter how ridiculous they sound and logic is for suicidal morons. The galaxy is proof that the Emperor's way was wrong.
Quick, burn some incense, shoot a mutant, splash about some holy oils, make the Sign of the Aquilla, then find a hole to hide in and pray some Space Marines show up! But not the Lamenters...or the Flesh Tearers...or the Black Templars - look, just pray some _sane_ Space Marines fix everything, and then we can go back to our thankless toil.
I'd pay good money to see a show that was just Guilliman dealing with the idiocy of the Imperial nobles, in an office-like environment. No battles, no Tyranids, just him putting people in their place for being counterproductive fools on Terra. It'd be as much a tragedy as a comedy, FFS he looks like he's ready to throw himself out an airlock into a warp storm in the 10th edition trailer
Meanwhile: Big E: Magnus if I die you have to sit on this damn throne because all of this is your fault Magnus: How is this all my fault? Big E: If you just did what you where told Humanity would have it's own webway and I would not me a decaying corpe on life suport
its not futile, at the very least it makes you feel better. And that's not counting how the butterfly effect changes things. Who knows? Maybe sorting your trash will cause a chain reaction that improves the environment. Maybe during the meditative state of sorting trash, the person will come up with a solution to not make the sky on fire
Ironically not recycling is better for the environment. The UK doesn't have the resources to recycle much of anything, so ships it off to countries half way round the world who do have facilities, but they only recycle so much of a % and dump the rest and what we send them into the sea. In contrast if you tip everything without a care it'll end up in a landfill site in the UK, which is eventually covered over when full and later mined for methane as it rots down. Hilarious isn't it, like something from a carry on film.
The tiny problem, assuming perfect efficiency and reduction of waste on the part of the recycling process, is immediacy If you do that shit long before theres any problems, i.e any pressing reason to, then yeah, awesome If youre turning to that shit when the sky's already on fire and the mountain is pissing liquid rock, you're a little too late I think
"But the sky's on fire and it's the best I can come up with."
That is the best description of a tech priest ever.
That's not a tech-priest. The symbol on the robe identifies him as a member of the Adeptus Administratum.
Or any politician ever
@@nyet_maker7948 It got me thinking about the half assed measures regarding climate change.
@@cautiouslycynical9786 ... That's because that's what it's based on.
@@Hyndergogen9 Ah, then that makes perfect sense. Sorry, didn't see the original sketch.
"It's a proper shambles"
The 41st millennium in a nutshell
I'm in the middle of Prospero Burns and I can confirm it was true in the 31st as well.
In the dark future of the 40 first millennium, things are a right bit wankered
This millennium, as well.
When Guiliman woke up and asked "Hows Imperium of man doing?"
*Bloodthirster:* "Blood for the blood god! Skulls for the skull thro- oh bloody hell, they've sorted their cardboard correctly, not a pizza box in sight... pack it up boys."
*Herald:* "They've put lightbulbs in with standard glass."
*Bloodthirster:* "SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE!"
When I'm trying to sleep tonight, I'll be lying there thinking about how the source of Khorne's perpetual rage is the fact that the inhabitants of the mortal realms aren't sorting their recyclable rubbish properly.
@@freakishuproar1168 This is now my headcanon.
I legit loled, thank you for that 🤣
Skulls go on the Skull throne, and Blood is dedicated to the Blood God. Even Bloodthirsters understand the value of sorting items into their proper place.
@@HansLemurson Now we only need to clarify if
a) sorting rubbish is secret Chaos worship
OR
b) Khorne is in secret a traitor to Chaos
Now I'm imagining their "Are we the baddies?" sketch in 40k.
He has already done it, just watch "Champion of Khorne has an existential crisis".
Yea it's already on my channel mate
I did that joke on the actual "Are we the baddies" video. One of the most popular TH-cam comments I've ever made, turns out.
@@edwinvoncarstein I didn't realize that. I'll check it out.
The irony is that the Imperium is very much aware of the skulls. It doesn't mean death to them though but humanity.
"Look at the sky, it looks like a smashed cake! The gods are huffing bonkers! We need to dedicate some of our precious time to a futile and time consuming ritual."
It's too perfect.
Ah Sky Cake, why are you so delicious....
@@XHobbiesPrime The forbidden cake
"You know the gods, they love all that shite."
Guilliman, what the fuck are these Lords of Terra talking about?
inquisitor: bureaucratic stuff
Guilliman: okay, kill them all
Guilliman is kinda the last one to execute people for being bureaucrats. It's the inefficiency that offends him.
So, methinks it'd be more like this:
inquisitor: bureaucratic stuff
Guilliman: Okay, but why isn't anything being done?
...
Inquisitor: Alright, you got me. It's not just bureaucracy, it's mostly self-serving bullshit. Also, like half of them are conspiring to depose you.
Guilliman: okay, kill them all
Since the Lion is here, I'd think the "kill'em all!", is more in his style.
Bobby G is a little bit to diplomatic for this, I am afraid.
Let the Beast do the dirty work
@@12SickOne34
Guilliman: Fn dropping the formalities! Lioooon!
Lion: Whaaaaat?
Guilliman: Go for a walk.
@Hohmann Transfer Window Washer I have seen a seemingly sudden and ridiculous number of these references pop up lately. Has TFS released some new abridged stuff or something?
@@JakeSmith-em5sh I'm going to have to admit to actively sowing some of these misplaced referencing seeds myself. No, they haven't, at least not to my knowledge. I simply find these 'skits' enjoyable.
Also (again, for now), until body of 40k Lion lore grows sufficiently, I'm treating his return with more than a little bit of contempt, much like I did with Guilliman's. Hence the lackadaisical referencing.
I am enjoying the deluge of new vids like this one, though. And this one specifically is extra good.
if you imagine the laugh track is the aeldaris reaction its 100xs funnier
The Orks would be laughing too!
Harlequins...
Hahaha silly monkeh's
There is no need to imagine a laugh track when looking at the space elfs, their whole existence is a joke.
@@TheHuangShan you sound butthurt. What happened? Did Howling Banshees tear up your gunline?
The cult leader suggesting sorting the rubbish into seperate bins as a solution to Chaos Warp Storms is ironically more sensible than anything the Imperial Ecclesiarchy has ever come up with. Truly, he is possessed of the wisdom of the God Emperor himself!
Tell that to the sisters of battle with their actual angel and miracles so consistent they can plan around them.
He is WHAT!
@@michaelwoffindin He means a religious government. I think he wanted to sound clever by using the word 'ecclesiarchy' instead of being clear.
@@jennyjohn704 I think they used the term Ecclesiarchy cause that’s what the religious branch of the Imperial government is often called in 40K.
@@jennyjohn704 They weren't trying to be clever, that's simply what it's called.
I very much vibe with the declaration, "Yea it's really bad, but it's the best i could come up with."
and then Roby G finally realizes the wiseman has been reading one of his brother's books again, the one that now wears spikey armour and has horns coming out the four sides of his head.
The one whose fault this all is?
@@sunstorm_ Magnus. Its all magnus's fault.
Lorgar tried to fix his mistake by bringing the truth of Chaos to the Imperium, but it was far too late.
@Dangerous Days It was a success but in a different way
Like worshipping the Emperor as a god
@@ezonplays2260 different nature of their failures. Magnus had a singly fantastic mistake that cascaded, Lorgar continually worked and sabotaged the purpose that they worked towards.
Imperial Priest - "We need to sort our rubbish into seperate bins"
Guilliman - "YES, YES, OH BY MY FATHER YES!"
*begins feverishly organising all bins in the imperium and drowns the Tyranids in plastic*
bobby g, the ocd member of the family
Nids probably find a way to digest it
Collect a Tyranid army and you'll also drown in plastic.
Plastic is not a biomass, you’re onto something
If the sky is on fire and you are pissing into the wind, you're going to buy yourself some time!
The best he could come up with on short notice. 😂😂😂
That actually sounds like a wise quote
Genuinely reminded me it's bin night
same here in Las Vegas, lol
Stop editing for a second and segregate your bins mate!
Make sure to take the metal lids off any glass jars and sort them accordingly or you'll doom us all!!!
@@edwinvoncarstein It's something to do while after effects tries to melt my cpu during rendering
fuck, i saw this on a monday morning
When the sky's on fire, pissing in the wind sounds like a good idea
But you have to squeeze really hard to get your piss to go high enough to be effective.
This somehow manages to sum up how the imperium works perfectly.
Yes, with the addendum that it actually *works*.
I can't believe how well this fits. Feels like a "cannon" conversation.
Canon*
@@hieioni3354 Canoe*
The guy Guilliman is talking to is an Administratum clerk, not a member of the Ecclesiarchy. But I guess the fact that it's hard to tell an accountant from a priest in the imperium is pretty funny too.
he makes a fair ass point
"Pissing in the wind" definition of Imperial attempts in Imperial Nylus
I think Big Bobby G would actually prefer this guy to what the Ecclesiarchy has on offer.
I really thought this would be the Vectron skit, with Roboute increasingly confused about why everyone keeps worshipping his father despite that being explicitly against his instruction.
That would be a Life of Brian moment.
Gulliman wasn't at work last Wednesday and now everything is talking about this "god emperor".
By the God-Emperor's knees, let's crack open the chablis!
By the Emperor's golden wings, haven't you heard?
Greetings, by the Emperor's kindly power claw...
The fact that Webb even has the Civic Crown on is PERFECT
We have The Emperor and Malcador at home
The Emperor and Malcador at home:
"Tell you what Guilliman, that Warp dust is really moreish."
After only a single day of sorting the rubbish, the Eye of Terror did indeed shut close.
It hurts how slim the satire is, here.
I love the bluntness of it. "Yeah, I know this probably isn't going to work, but all signs point to our imminent death. So I figure we better try something."
The worst part is, he's right.
Its quite a good start, it would make Nurgle think twice about going to a planet that is too clean
This is the best one of these I've seen, it's proper legit.
"the sky looks like a smashed cake" :'D
As if Guilliman wasn't already seperating the rubbish in Ultramar.
This has to be one of the most perfect fits.
you know...this works, on alot of levels, and gave me a good laugh. Well done!
“A giant head in the sky is controlling the weather. Did you wanna play checkers?! Let’s be rational!”
To quote a certain deranged skeleton.
"Know my pain."
"My Lord, the galaxy is literally cut in half and we can't tell what's going on in the other half, not sure what you expect me to do"
Nope. This wise man makes sense compared to the Imperium.
That Mitchell and Webb Look - S03E04
at about 18 minutes in
This sounds like the last few years. Interesting times!
I just love the idea of Roboute Guilliman describing the Imperial Cult as 'Pissing in the wind!'
Take it from the Orks, if you believe it works it will.
These are dark days...
40K parody aside, this is brilliant satire.
I like to imagine that if the Peep Show characters were each a faction in 40K, Super Hans would be so much of a coke-snorting lunatic he'd make even the Drukhari uncomfortable.
This isn't from peep show though, it's a great comedy though. "The answer is crime" :D love hans
this is how every conversation with guiliman and Mathew went
Truly not a crossover I ever expected to see
The sorting begins, and the sister's faith in the task causes a miracle to occur that saves everybody's ass. Roboute is slack-jawed with a face of shock and disgust. While the Black Templars are screaming fanatical praises in the background.
Whoa. Respect on both the idea and the execution here.
Congratulations you don't need to read any of the new stuff with Guiliman in it. This was it. This was the books.
It’s very pissing in the wind 😂
🤣🤣🤣 best punchline ever
The VECTRON sketch would have suited perfectly, as well
Best one I’ve seen
This is one of your best - seamless matchup
I imagine the chaos equivalent is a Heretic Space Marine being told by a sorcerer to add more spikes and skulls to his armor. "You know, just look evil, n'shit..."
You know gods they love all that shit!
That was the line that got me.
You could have a video every daay fo the next 40,000 years with just using Mitchell and Webb
If the sky is on fire might as well piss in the wind....
Oh, the "Vectron" sketch would also be fertile ground for Guilliman not quite understanding where the whole "worship the emperor like a god" thing came from.
I am laughing so hard right now. This is genius in a lore accurate way.. :D
I forget WH40K is a British thing until something like this comes along
That is probably the most sincere Imperial Priest I've ever seen.
Mitchell and Webb is fertile 40k meme potential written all over it.
Thought this was going to be the "By Vectron!" Sketch
When the sky is on fire, pissing in the wind is your best bet to put it out.
The idea of Primarch R. Gulliman saying "pissing in the wind" ....priceless
The best part is that the guy sounds crazy out of context but in the situation you gotta admit he has a point and is probably right.
This pretty much sums up the galaxy Guilliman woke up in. Where the crazy soothsayers are right at least ninety percent of the time no matter how ridiculous they sound and logic is for suicidal morons. The galaxy is proof that the Emperor's way was wrong.
"It's VERY pissing in the wind"
Given the state of the 40k galaxy and all the weird shit the regularly happens, this idea legit could actually work.
The fucked up part is when it works and Guilliman has to go back to the throneroom to ask the emperor what the hell that was all about.
"I've got it, we should send more of the guardsmen into the eye, that'll solve it"
He is a reddit atheist in a world where reddit doesnt exist.
I am so happy to discover Warhammer 40k through laughter and memes
I mean, he aint wrong
He makes a surprisingly good Gulliman
Galaxy in 40k: "It's a proper shambles"
I feel like the "Vectron" sketch would've worked better for Guilliman.
This is good, but I would really like to see more Clarke and Dawe please,
You should do one of Your Highness, the bit where he finds the bone sword, would work with Abaddon finding Drach'nyen.
Quick, burn some incense, shoot a mutant, splash about some holy oils, make the Sign of the Aquilla, then find a hole to hide in and pray some Space Marines show up! But not the Lamenters...or the Flesh Tearers...or the Black Templars - look, just pray some _sane_ Space Marines fix everything, and then we can go back to our thankless toil.
If you piss into the wind enough then some of it might blow into the sky and stop the fire
This is entirely too accurate.
"It's a proper shambles". aka the Infinite Dark.. 😅
FOR VECTRON!
Did that priest just say God's plural, that's heresy.
I can't stop watching this
I was expecting this to be the 'Hail Vectron' sketch tbh
If the sky was on fire I would also piss on the wind
Yurp, that's what they're best at, pissing in the wind
Ah That Mitchell and Webb look, we meet again old friend!
This is very Pratchett
I thought it was going to be the "are we the baddies" sketch :)
Its tzeench laughing in the background
so according to 40k lore this is the future huimanity takes if the british became the ruling group of earth
I'd pay good money to see a show that was just Guilliman dealing with the idiocy of the Imperial nobles, in an office-like environment. No battles, no Tyranids, just him putting people in their place for being counterproductive fools on Terra. It'd be as much a tragedy as a comedy, FFS he looks like he's ready to throw himself out an airlock into a warp storm in the 10th edition trailer
"The Emporer recycles"
Not an Ecclesiarchy liturgical garb, but an Administratum cleric's uniform.
oh my,atleast he was honest XD
Meanwhile:
Big E: Magnus if I die you have to sit on this damn throne because all of this is your fault
Magnus: How is this all my fault?
Big E: If you just did what you where told Humanity would have it's own webway and I would not me a decaying corpe on life suport
its not futile, at the very least it makes you feel better. And that's not counting how the butterfly effect changes things. Who knows? Maybe sorting your trash will cause a chain reaction that improves the environment. Maybe during the meditative state of sorting trash, the person will come up with a solution to not make the sky on fire
Ironically not recycling is better for the environment. The UK doesn't have the resources to recycle much of anything, so ships it off to countries half way round the world who do have facilities, but they only recycle so much of a % and dump the rest and what we send them into the sea. In contrast if you tip everything without a care it'll end up in a landfill site in the UK, which is eventually covered over when full and later mined for methane as it rots down. Hilarious isn't it, like something from a carry on film.
The tiny problem, assuming perfect efficiency and reduction of waste on the part of the recycling process, is immediacy
If you do that shit long before theres any problems, i.e any pressing reason to, then yeah, awesome
If youre turning to that shit when the sky's already on fire and the mountain is pissing liquid rock, you're a little too late I think
@@greypilgrim228 I mean there is the problem of the stuff that doesnt rot though, thats gotta be dealt with too