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seriously. like yeah, its normal to feel let down that a creator you like is a shitty person, but i cant stand when people defend them so heavily. unless you have personally known them for YEARS (and i say years bc you can know someone for a year and not REALLY know anything) then you shouldn't say shit bc you dont know them.
you realize most men who clame to be nice guys are the most fucking weirdest strange ass perverts period 😅 that’s like saying james charles is a nice guy and not a creep sorry but what why would anyone want to defend perverts and creeps i just don’t get it
I was thinking how Emma Chamberlain met Cody at 17 and if it came out that they hooked up people would be horrified. But for some reason when it’s Tana nobody cares. It’s so messed up.
victim-blaming! a lot of girls act like tana in a response to being molested as a minor. instead of getting help, they get seen like they “deserved” it due to how they start acting when BOTH are the fault of the predator. our society favors evil and punishes innocence. we can fight back if we educate ourselves and others!
I think it’s because at some points she has defended, worked with, and stood by abusers. Not saying it’s right…but it makes you less sympathetic. Not that it should take away from Cody’s actions, fuck him! It’s obnoxious that instead of just listening to her and taking action against Cody - it has to be a side-picking situation. Tana can be problematic sometimes, and Cody can be a predator. Two things can be true.
When I was 16, I dm’d a 23 year old, the older brother of a classmate, and began flirting. He was polite, but then checked my facebook and responded “how old are you…?” and i replied truthfully. He goes “You’re a beautiful girl, but you’re 16. Find a 16 year old guy who thinks you’re cool. I’m too old for you, I promise you’ll have no problems finding someone your age.” and then blocked me. HES SUCH A KING. And he was right!!!!! My husband is less than a month older than me. His bday is May 24 and mine is June 20 of the same year. I just wish every other 20+ guy i hit up as a teen was like the one who rejected me :(
See, people?! It shouldn't be hard to be a decent human being! On a side note, I'm 15 days older than my bf and it's just so great. We live similar experiences at similar times, we grow together and we have a similar mindset. We disagree here and there, but having someone with a healthy and contemporary mentality on dating, disagreements and things like that is a 100/10.
That's how a decent guy responds, and I'm glad he did that. You know someone's a creep the moment they drop the "16 is the age of consent" argument. 14 used to be the age of consent in the UK till it was changed to 16 in 2008, and I'm pretty sure it used to be pretty normal amongst a few weirdos, but now it's illegal. So idk why 16 is fine and acceptable, even though it's only two years.
@@HusnaArtz2 Maybe it's similar to my country? Age of consent is 14 yo, BUT from 14 to 18, they can only consent in certain situations. If there's a power dynamic, if the older one uses their experience and/or the lack of experience of the minor to have sexual relations/force them to do anything, etc (and honestly, I struggle to think of a circumstance where an adult would not use the minor's lack of experience to force them/convince them to do stuff). The problem is that they are sometimes scared of reporting to the police or the police are too incompetent (which unfortunately tends to happen with all types of SA or r-pe).
I always think about the amount of 20 something year olds that slept with girls in my school at 16/17 and wonder what kind of men they are now (I’m 30 now for context). ‘Everyone’ did it but of course that doesn’t make it okay.
@@helloimelsa239 I'm 46 now, and when I was in highschool, a lot of my friends when were as young as 15 or 16 were in relationships with men in their early to mid twenties. At the time, nobody seemed to care - not even parents of these girls - and in restrospect it's seriously horrifying. I hope that parents don't accept that kind of thing anymore.
Fr, I remember my friends thinking I was so cool at 15 cause my 20 year old boyfriend would pick me up from school... now I'm 28 and even at 20, I was like that wasn't cool... that was weird and I had no one in my corner to tell me it was weird of him to be attracted to me..
i’m 24, my best friend is 19 and I literally see her like a baby sister. I could never see anyone her age romantically. Shes fetal. I joke about her tripping over her umbilical cord
Okay so I was a very dedicated Cody Ko fan for years. THE SECOND I heard this; blocked on everything. I’m sorry but we have to maintain consistency with everyone no matter if we are a fan or not. I wish people would stop pretending it’s hard not to COMMIT LITERAL SEX CRIMES ON WOMEN AND GIRLS. Period. End of.
Same 😭😭 lunch time is very different now. I can’t look past this plus the Colby thing. If he made a video addressing both things I’d watch it sure, but otherwise I want nothing to do with him anymors
THIS! the victim-blaming is unreal! trisha had a great point also, that she only acted in those ways (hyper sexual at too young) bc she was also touched sexually too young. Instead of seeing these women wrongly and thinking they deserve it, why don’t we look into the impact of childhood molestations and put the blame on the ACTUAL PREDATORS than the victims
@@magikpotato it’s considered rap3 because of brain development research.that proves those age ranges don’t have access to parts of the brain that could even allow them true decision making. it’s like making a decision without knowing all the details of what each choice means or comes with. demi lovato was 17 with a 29 year old and was in love with him for many years. she wrote a song once she turned 29 with proper brain development and realized how wrong it was even though she *THOUGHT* she wanted it all along. one of her lines is “17 would never cross my mind” meaning as a 29 herself, she could NEVER be with someone that young admitting how wrong that is. there is a reason humanity came up with terms like “grooming” to help understand this evil issue. the one being groomed believes they like it, they want it, they are not even a victim at all…. it takes “un-grooming” yourself which is similar to the process of “un-brainwashing” from a cult. you need distance away and time to process to see clearly. some people never see clearly even after they get away to not face the true weight of how bad it was but prefer to keep a form of delusion about it forever as a form of self-protection, but this actually causes worse damage later on “the body keeps score” is a great book about how trauma can live on undetected as well as the dangers of unfaced trauma turning into physical ailments in later years.
Cody Ko is fucking scary. How is that this situation is being talked about, yet Cody hasn’t seemed to receive any backlash?😭I don’t care much for Tana, but there are people saying she’s unreliable bc she’s a ‘drama seeker’ or smtg, like?? That doesn’t excuse Cody being 25 and sleeping with a 17y/o 🥲🫠
Tana is known for lying a lot. At least that is what I know her from. I personally believe her, but I can see why some may not just based on her history.
this is obviously sickening on cody’s part, but more needs to be said about cody’s best man at his wedding, Colby Leachman. apparently he raped two women at Duke and recorded them. cody must have known about this and still considers a rapist a good enough friend to be his best man. makes me wonder if Kelsey also knew of this man’s past considering it was her wedding as well. 🤢
If we know, it’s safe to assume they know- also, he showed the video to his frat brothers so he mightve not only known about it but even been shown the video of his groomsman assaulting women.
Also even if Tana doesnt feel traumatized by it, he didnt know thats how she would react to his actions. He took advantage of a minor and risked potentially traumatizing her for life just for his own sick pleasure. Like, when we watch things like to catch a predator, we never go "oh well even tho he tried to meet up with a minor in reality he failed and was talking to an undercover adult the whole time, so he's good". No, we recognize that attempting to do something harmful and failing by chance makes someone just as bad as if they succeeded. This cody l case is no different
And, to piggyback off of that, when she talks about how she subsequently went and hooked up with many and much older men, she doesn't seem to clock the fact that THAT could be her being traumatized. Maybe she would have behaved like that anyway, but I can't imagine being taken advantage of as a child FAN helped at all.
I love how Cody reached out to her and didn't even ask if she was okay and just only cared about himself (as always) and brought up his wedding and everything.
@@alexisgee2314 tana and cody hooked up 2015; and cody and kelsey (according to insta) didn’t start dating until sep. 15 of 2017. honestly, i feel bad for tana; as she’s the one having to re-process all of this. while i’m glad she doesn’t feel as though she’s been victimized, she was still a minor in a situation that she NEVER should have been in. and i feel bad for kelsey, ASSUMING she had no prior knowledge of this. i had no idea who cody ko was until this whole thing came out, and as an almost 22 year old, i can’t even imagine befriending a 17 year old! let alone sleeping with one! this man was 25, had been ‘warned’ prior by another adult … and still chose to sleep with a minor. it’s vile!
I cannot stand Tana or her content. HOWEVER, it is so disgusting and gross what’s happened to her. For her to say “worst things have happened” is just so sad. I’ve loved Cody’s content for years, and she’s absolutely right. If he was a hated creator it would be different. There’s No excuses. Edit: I’m not removing anything I’ve said. Instead I’ll add, even though I didn’t mean to. It comes off as insensitive for me to comment my feelings about Tana. She is the victim here, that’s what matters. Not any of the controversies.
The cannot stand tana or her content part was a little unnecessary. No one is going to assume you to be a super fan because you disagree with statutory rape
as others have pointed out, this is actually kind of a pattern of behaviour for cody, too. back when he was in college one of his frat buddies raped a woman, then invited other members of their frat up to rape her whilst he recorded the whole ordeal. following this, said-offender went on to show numerous others from their frat this video and has even been taken to court over it (though, it was extremely difficult for the victim to get the ball rolling on this, because he's a duke nepo baby). cody remains his friend to this day, and even featured him as a part of his wedding party. most of cody's audience is staunchly-against this behaviour, so it's pretty crazy to watch in real time how people will completely bend and contort their morals just to feel justified in defending a random person who doesnt even know they exist
Knowing you won’t be believed if you come forward because the person who SA’d you is so well liked and loved is truly one of the most difficult burdens to carry
She keeps reiterating that it was just the lifestyle she had at the time. That makes me wonder if her environment groomed her to not associate hurt or trauma with things that are extremely wrong. Like she was prepped to not internalize these interactions because she started yt at 15. That brings in many other encounters that were probably unsafe, its like it tore down her guard and internal protection for herself to allow other things to happen to her without emotional pushback.
the interactions she had w shane dawson on camera were weird as hell. i can only imagine how weird he was w her behind the scenes. esp bc shane was also weird with trevi moran when she was a minor as well
It is clear in her old collabs w men, she is seen as an object. The way they treated her as a claim for fame and normalised it bc it's "Tana". What makes it worse is, it is obviously her childhood trauma that made her believe it's fine. The thing is ppl calling tana dirty, sl*tty or whatever, clearly never met anyone who went through extreme trauma at a young age. She shows the real side.
It’s even more disgusting because tana had been through so much and was definitely so vulnerable. They were also collabing and working together, so it so creepy and unprofessional on Cody’s part, even if she was of age. It’s crazy that Cody is just ignoring something so serious and something that is clearly traumatic in some way to Tana.
This entire situation has honestly made me feel so unsafe around straight men. Like Tana talking about how it would be so much easier if the predator in the situation was already disliked is so real because a lot of men won't turn on each other even when they do the most heinous shit.
@rmac02 oh stop it 🛑 u KNOW we live in a world that excuses straight cis men's behavior. that doesn't apply to other demographics, so it's not comparable. this comment is giving male apologist.
When I was 17 I was dating a 25 year old. He even proposed! I said no n ran far far away. I look back n feel so gross about it still to this day. I'm 30.
Love or Hate Tana or Cody. But it’s just straight up wrong that Cody as a 25 year old man could sleep with a 17 year old girl. He straight up took advantage of her even if she didn’t feel taken advantage of she definitely was. And the fact Gabbie Hanna took the time to tell him that Tana was a kid and he shouldn’t. He’s a criminal and a creep. He’s a father now and is married to a woman who use to be a teacher.
Im his same age too and I remember being grossed out with myself for going on a date with a 21 year old when I was 24. He wanted a 17 year old?!?!?! 🤢 They’re still BARELY adults and we absolutely knew better back then. So relieved I could never get into his content
The only way he could keep a shred of dignity and claim that he changed as a person since then, in my eyes, would be to remove himself from his career permanently and like become a monk or something. I really hope we are at a point with the internet where we let him fall off because we don't like kid diddlers and we don't let people sweep things like this under the rug and move on. I was a fan, but no longer.
I relate to Tana's feelings about this heavily. I was in a relationship with a 20 year old when I was 15 which is wild to think about. Literally a lot of adults knew we were together and didn't care because we both went to church? Like insane shit to think about. But I don't even associate that with a traumatic event at all, it just was what it was. I know it was bad, and I still side eye the dude, but for some reason am so desensitized to it. I do not care for Tana, and was a Cody Ko fan, but I absolutely believe her.
Yes I had similar experiences as a teen and it was totally normalized in my life I didn’t think it was weird. I think many women have had these experiences and it is honestly sad to realize
When I was growing up it was no big deal nor unusual for a 20 year old guy to date a 15 year old girl. Society didn’t care so we can’t now look back and hate the men for it. Rules have changed and it’s no longer acceptable. You need to judge based on the time period. I have no idea how long ago your instance was but I’m guessing it wasn’t that long ago, making it worse than if it happened decades ago.
@@organiclady it should be inherent not to be attracted to a 15 year old as a 20 year old. biologically and psychologically. without societal rules. rules created by perverted men in the first place.
So I’m seeing now that one of Cody’s groomsmen SA’d at least two women and videoed and shared it. And I adored Cody prior to Tana’s story coming out. He’s going to take the Nikita Dragun route and just not address it unless he’s forced to. His latest IG post is full of fans telling him to answer for it. Not so much on Kelsey’s (which I understand, she’s a new mother and the burden isn’t on her). Unfortunately, unless the pressure builds I don’t see him having to answer for this.
Honestly, I feel for Kelsey. She just had a child and I'm hoping she didn't know about this before. Like what do you even do in this situation? Leave as a new mother and with the salary of a teacher? Stay? Damn.
Tana is really starting to unravel her trauma and is doing it in such a mature way for herself compared to what she used to do. I really think she has started to come into a comprehensible stage in life and it will take time for her to understand what happened to her, wasn’t her fault or her actions that brought these events on.
I just said this with jojo to a friend, if these problematic kids can grow up, mature, and learn, ill make space for their growth. Tana was a kid for the start of her career and i think about 19 year old me i would not have organized tanacon well either. Adults did fail her. And i hope shes learned sooo much and heals.
Tana’s situation really reminds me of Demi Lovato’s song “29” where she said “17 would never cross my mind.” It’s sick. I’m glad Tana is okay and isn’t traumatized ❤️
@@salmansdriver9561 Demi Lovato got into a relationship with a man when she was 17, and he was 29. She’s basically saying now that she is 29, she would never even think about dating a 17 year old. I hope this helps! I highly recommend listening to it 😊
@@Emma_78 thank you for explaining! it's very unfortunate how common these kinds of experiences us for us... i will listen to the song, i really like her voice
It’s so disappointing to me that he’s facing zero repercussions. I’ve been a fan for years and I stopped watching him point blank period. I can’t believe the rest of the fans don’t care.
It’s possible that they don’t even know. This is the first time I’m hearing about this and it’s so incredibly saddening and disappointing to hear about this. I can’t look at him the same anymore.
@@storm_clxudsfor sure a lot of them don’t know. it’s being pushed down so much. like adam said, even his subreddit is blocking tana’s name. so sad and disappointing
I’ve also been a fan for a while and it’s really surprising honestly. I just feel weird watching his videos knowing what happened. First it was Griffinilla now this
it sickens me how people excuse the possibility of this act happening to tana by sayint that shes problematic. there are no perfect victims, and women who are seen as attention seeking can be saed just like anyone else
As someone that’s been through heavy trauma, I can empathize with experiencing something and thinking it’s “not that bad” but there’s also a very real trauma that comes with looking back on something and feeling gross about it because now you know how bad it was. I really wish Tana the best and I hate that people are blaming her.
trauma is tricky. her brain could be protecting her from most of the feelings related to it still through dissociation just because we can’t access our full feelings, doesn’t mean it didn’t harm us recommend “the body keeps score” book on trauma ❤
And once you've unpacked and actually processed the heavier trauma, that's when the unprocessed, less obvious trauma comes to the surface. which means often feelings change, from "this was fine" to "this was actually horrible" but there's some idea of "oh, I told him we're good, I've said publicly I'm not traumatized by this" because it's all RELATIVE to whatever trauma is currently at the forefront of the mind!
I hate how so many people just assume that someone is a good person just because they are a liked influencer or celebrity. This worship culture is disgusting. Thank you for talking about this.
HE and Noel lost me when I saw a clip of their podcast giggling about how they saw a poor teenage girl get harrased at a Starbucks by a grown man and they did nothing to stop it
What people don't get is Tana actually was sexually groomed by so many different men before she was an adult. That's why she acts the way she does, that's why she's so promiscuous (nothing wrong with an adult being promiscuous btw) why she is the person she is. Trauma has sculpted her, it's also why she's problematic and defends predators and bad people sometimes. Also why she acts like a highschooler even though she's older/ bout the same age as I am. Look to Trisha as an example of what sexual trauma can do to you and the way you act/treat others. Trauma doesn't excuse the things she's done or said but it is an explanation and foresight into why she's practically excusing what happened to her specifically and why she talks about how she was with other guys, like her bringing up sleeping with 30+ yo's. It doesn't excuse how she was treated. Not that there needs to be a reason not to treat someone that way, but in no way shape or form was she asking for Cody to pursue her or take advantage of her even if she was the one making advances. In no way did she deserve it and whether she sees it as it or not, it's trauma. Tana pushes all sexual trauma to the "consensual" file to cope. I did the same thing, why I didn't realize until this year that I've been SA'd and (statutory) r8ped when I was 15. It's kinda like "boys will be boys" mentality. "Cody is fine for taking advantage of Tana cause she was the one coming onto him and she's beautiful and how can he resist" it's no different from saying "ya that 5yo was asking for it cause she was wearing a cute dress and playing alone and she was really friendly and cute so he couldn't control himself." 1. disgusting and horrible mentality, if men can't control themselves they need to be put down like the dogs they are (obviously not all men we're talking about predators rn) 2. I think we need to give some men a little more credit because probably a majority of men aren't like this. I know a large amount are, but most are not and it shouldn't be the norm to excuse horrible behavior when the majority aren't committing these disgusting acts. Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk, didn't mean for it to be this long 😭thanks for anyone who made it to the end😅
thank you!!! trying to put this education out there also! trisha touched on this it makes me sick how society thinks. the victim blaming is insane. if a boy is getting hit at home and he becomes aggressive(bc children model the behavior), would society think that kid just “deserves” to get beat up in the future also bc he’s a “bad boy” ?!?!?! NO (reactionary abuse is more like self defense especially in a CHILD) so why if a girl got molested at a young age and then starts acting more sexual(bc children model behavior), would society think she “deserves” to be sexually assaulted in the future also bc she’s a “bad girl” ……………… how about we blame the cause instead of the outcome, adults instead of children, predators instead of victims. my, my what a fallen world humanity has made…
Here's an actual argument that the predator my parents (whom I don't talk to for this and numerous other abuse related reasons) are still friends with used in court, after SAing two pre teens (including his daughter's best friend) for three years used in actual court: "She wanted it, because she moved her pelvis when I touched her" and "The Bible says that if a woman lies with a man in the town and doesn't cry out, she wants to lie with him." Yeah, fuck that guy. He got six years, let out in 3. And he had an affair with their mother too. She knew, didn't do a thing, and faced no consequences. I fortunately have never had anything that bad. I know I'm downplaying, but I do compare, I can't help it. But I was groomed and gr*ped by a man in his eighties when I was 14. My mother knew and didn't do anything until everyone else started to notice and expressed concerns to her. Then she accused me of having an affair with him. I'm trauma dumping - sorry
@@rachelstanger6079 honey no, you're allowed to tell your story however you need, in whatever context. That is so horrible and I'm sorry, just remember it wasn't ever your fault and your trauma matters just as much as any other survivor. I am also someone who compares trauma unfortunately. I grew up in an abusive household and am pretty antisocial as a result, I found someone who treated me nicely but was 18 (I was 15) and dated him, expressed I didn't wanna do anything yet he.. did anyway. I know it's not as horrible and traumatic as most victims stories yet I can still acknowledge its smth that shouldn't have happened and that was wrong, I never realized until I spoke about it in therapy as an adult. I think it's only natural to compare trauma to minimize your own pain and thus protect yourself from the trauma. I've always minimized anything bad happening to me as "well I've had worse so" or "other people are dealing with worse" I think it's a type of trauma response. Don't ever apologize for talking about your story though, we're survivors, not victims.
This situation with Tana and Cody Ko has me heavily reflecting on my own experiences. When I was 16yo I was sleeping with a man who was 26. I was in high school, partying and getting high constantly, and he was a grown man who had just gotten back home from his most recent deployment in the army. He was my best friend's (who was 2 years older than me) boyfriend's brother. I hadn't thought about it in years, and saying I understand where Tana is coming from as far as not considering it as "real" trauma is an understatement. At the time, I had already been sexually assaulted, was being groomed by another man in his late 30s, and had just been raped by 3 older men in their early 20s who I had trusted. And I went on to endure worse. I am a survivor of being trafficked. So when I think back to those encounters with the 26yo army man I never looked back in anger and hurt. This whole thing has me really thinking about that relationship (if you can even call it that) and how disgusting it was.
Cody ko is a massive weirdo if it wasnt Tana and another girl or influencer with a better track record with the public people wouldnt be defending Cody Ko. Its disturbing that people are okaying it because its tana its not okay and its illegal
I think the saddest thing i found out is she would have had to report him within a year for a misdemeanor or three for a felony of the event. I cant believe theres a statute for statutory
this prevents so much justice bc MOST victims need that time to process, regain the ability to speak for self, rebuild health, rebuild finances/life, get to an okay enough position to even take on a mountain like that.
@@k_singsss_1556 Ya but it also prevents justice from being poorly excuted. I am not agreeing with his actions just saying yall act like these things exsist just to fuck over women as if there is no logic to the justice system.
@@TheLostOne232 strange bc forensics can develop over time and cause re-openings of cold cases from decades before. may not be the best because witnesses remember less and other factors… but it’s still justice even if years later. this should be the mentality for everything. it takes years to process the victim hood, get help, get financially okay, etc to fight back against most abusers.
@k_singsss_1556 1, where in this situation is forensic required ? She is not claiming to have been raped. Furthermore, the example you brought up still requires a crime to be reported in a timely manner in order to then rely on advancements in science and technology. It is very crucial to report crimes as early as possible so that the appropriate evidence can be compiled. Even if current technology can't solve it, perhaps future technology can. Nothing I have said disagrees with your mindset.
Not every person who is robbed at gun point will be traumatized. Some will experience trauma and some will not. However, all have had a crime committed against them. And in each case, the "robber" knowingly chose to commit that crime, aware of the possibility it could cause trauma.
this! i’ve been attacked by two dogs; one bit my arms and stomach and another bit my face. Only the first one traumatized me. The week after the second attack happened, I was rolling in the grass with the dog who’d bitten my face. Still love him to this day. Its all relative!
louis mcclung's video had this segment about cody ko's friend from college that he still associates with, and its very telling of his morals and where he draws the line (or doesnt)
i’m a small streamer and when i was 17 a 29 year old, with a much larger audience than me, groomed me & initiated a sexual relationship with me. i relate to tana so much with my thought process. i was a fan of his and he knew that, he knew i was a minor and still initiated everything with me. i didn’t realize i had been groomed until i saw allegations from another fan saying he was pressure her to talk about sexual things with him and she was about 10 years younger than him. i realized that if a legal adult is uncomfortable with their age gap then what he did to me was definitely not okay so i wrote an anonymous twitlonger about my experience mainly because i knew there were other minors in his community and i wanted to protect them. for a while i wasn’t sure how to feel about it and felt guilty for ruining his career as he was a full time content creator. i’m now 20 and realize just how much that relationship affected me.
I don't know if you need to read this, but just in case: I don't know who you are and I don't know who you're talking about, but his career being ruined is NOT your fault. It's a consequence of his own actions. I know it's not easy to stop feeling guilty, but it's a process.
tana may have done a lot of shitty things in the past, but what happened to her was fucking awful. i feel for her so deeply and it’s disgusting how people have reduced this whole situation down to “oh it’s just tana”
NO ONE DESERVES THAT! AND MOST GIRLS START ACTING LIKE TANA’S BEHAVIORS FROM BEING MOLESTED AT A VERY YOUNG AGE. TRISHA TALKED AB THIS WHY CANT MORE PEOPLE REALIZE THIS?! HOW DO WE GET TO A POINT WHERE WE VICTIM-BLAME AS A SOCIETY ⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️
People's obsession with the "perfect victim" is baffling It all makes sense now, all her past behaviours could be correlated to the amount abuse she was put through I hope she heals
@@greenthinggg YES! I truly believe that ALL girls who act promiscuous were groomed to act that way. no one is born overly sexual. society has got to stop with the blame and shame. start actually helping and healing!
I feel for Tana when she talks about how relatively this isn’t traumatic for her. I also appreciate that she recognizes that is her own journey and how just because this wasn’t as impactful for her as other events, it is still bad. Both can be true at the same time and it can be hard to come to terms with that
So I was groomed by a 23 year old when I was 15. We were together for 8 years. At this point we’ve been broken up for about 6 years- I am 29 years old and just now really processing what happened to me. For awhile I would still occasionally talk to my ex. But now it makes me feel physically nauseous to think about them and I do not want to be reminded of them at all. Tana may feel differently as she processes things that have happened to her and whatever she is feeling is valid. I am just glad she has support ❤
@@sainttheresetaylor2054 that’s a fair question. The person who groomed me is my best friend’s cousin. We met because I went on a trip on summer vacation with my best friend and her family. Before I went on the trip, my mom told me that my dad was moving to another state and that when I got back we would be moving in with my grandma. That’s a lot of unnecessary details, but basically I was 15 and about to have a lot of life changes happening, and that made it very easy for someone manipulative to swoop in and get to work. I put in a lot of effort to hide it from my mom and she was going through a hard time herself. By the time she was aware that this person had bad intentions, I was 18 and she did try to talk sense into me without pushing me away completely. There are definitely plenty of adults that should have stepped in throughout the entirety of that situation, and I obviously do not think my parents are blameless. But I would also not be quick to assume that anyone that has a child that experiences this is a bad parent. Also, thank you for your comment! I have been apprehensive to talk openly about this issue good practice for me.
THIS! during me too movement I learned how many people I knew personally were rapists. a lot of them, the women could not speak up bc the predators were well liked in the community. this is a MAJOR problem
also side note if you’re 25 and find yourself in circles with 17 year olds you should question that immediately like i don’t even know any children besides my family😭
I can really resonate with her point of view around feeling like she was just having fun because I had “relations” with older men from 16-17 years old. My first boyfriend was 21 and I was just turning 16 for an example. I don’t see myself as a victim either so I just get what she means so much. As a mom with a daughter I would never allow her to be with a man when she is a child so I know it’s wrong but I still don’t see my situation as a victim situation so I really do get what she is saying.
part of the huge problem (and why it’s illegal) is BECAUSE brains that age in development can’t see with full clarity in their own situations even if it feels that way. it is like being under a spell. sometimes the spell can have residue into adulthood to never really see the real issues. highly rec book “the body keeps score” even if we don’t feel our trauma, it is in there somewhere & it can cause real health problems if ignored for too many years. many ways to release inner, trapped trauma that you may not even realize is there. best wishes ❤
My opinion on people saying “this adult doesn’t have anything in common with this minor, why do they want to be friends with a minor” is that i think firstly, I think that phrasing creates a generational gap where both sides think that they have nothing in common with the other, and thus when an adult DOES have something in common with a minor, the minor feels special and is more at risk of being groomed. And second, I think it’s important for minors to have friends who are normal adults not trying to groom them because then they have an idea what a friendship with an adult is SUPPOSED to be like and recognize the warning signs when they’re being groomed. Of course, these kinds of friendships with inherent power dynamics requires the adult to maintain proper boundaries with the minor - you can have a friendship with a minor who’s a fan of something you’re a fan of or whatever, but it’s the adult’s responsibility to make sure that they don’t treat them like they would their fellow adult friends and keep the friendship about the shared interests instead of personal topics
It's gross that people discount and don't believe women for literally any reason... and it's so gross how Cody's capitalized off of this "good guy" persona. It's really simple to just unsubscribe from someone and not support someone the moment allegations come out. I swear the fans are bending over backwards trying to not only protect a rapist, but also the whole situation with Cody and Kelsey having a rapist (Colby Leachman, who should have been convicted) in their wedding party. He's rich beyond belief and I'm sure isn't addressing the issue because he's been advised legally not to, but it's disgusting as hell to see him still coming out with videos. All he cares about his money. And all his fans care about is trying to protect his image and convince others he's a changed man now because he has a family. Fuck that.
12:18 the fact that people are saying, “but it’s Tana mongeau” is genuinely so disgusting :( To insinuate she deserved it bc of her “lifestyle” (e.g., she talks about sex, she’s popular, she struggled with substance abuse disorder), truly shows how people degrade and punish women. I know she’ll never see this but TANA!!!!😭😭😭 you are worthy of being protected, defended, loved, considered, respected, nurtured, and SO MUCH MORE. You did NOT deserve what happened to you. NO ONE deserves to be victimized. I’m so sorry this happened to you.
not to mention that “lifestyle” (i also hate that word lol) usually comes from trauma like the hypersexuality & substance issues. everyone wants a perfect victim that rarely ever exists
My ex and I were the same ages as her and him and I ended up married to him for 7 incredibly shitty years because he knew how easy it was to manipulate a literal child. I can’t even look at Cody Ko anymore. It makes my skin crawl.
There is truly a lot of darkness in the TH-camr scene Tana was basically groomed by Cody while I don’t always agree with her and she went off the rails herself later on I am glad Gabbie said something to Cody to at least try to stop or discourage him. But this truly makes me think how dark the big TH-camr scene is/was.
Regarding this summer being so hot, reminds me of that one Simpson’s meme that’s like: this is the COLDEST summer of the rest of your life we are quite literally cooked
Tana and I are the same age so I’ve always cut her some slack because even though we are different people I can kinda understand her mindset due to the fact our minds are developed somewhat at a similar rate. I think over the years we’ve learned so much about what she’s been through and maybe why she is the way she is. I’m not above shaking my head at her from time to time but I just think Tana is owed a lot more empathy than she receives. And it broke my heart to see her refer to other victims as real victims because even she isn’t grant herself the grace that she sometimes deserves.
it's so crazy, why can't people understand that even "loved" people can be WRONG, he is very wrong for sleeping with her and it's even more wrong to reach out and try and guilt trip her! WTF? he needs to address it and own up to it. PERIOD
legitimately. like i have been a cody and a tana fan since i was a child and the second i hear about this i stop watching him. it’s not that hard his content isn’t that good anyways
I mean as much as im uninterested in Tana, and have only watched other people talk about things she has done (so my perception ain't really that high of her) I am glad she spoke up about it because it helps put in perspective that even if she did 'consent' this and 'had fun' or whatever, is a problem of the adult in the situation and this is not ok. it's just too irreversibly irresponsible to go on and defend that dangerous adult just because the child in the situation may not have found it to be bad or traumatizing, the point is the adult is targeting children for sexual acts period and that is not and never will be ok. I also don't think anyone online has a right to tell Tana how she *should* feel about this situation (as someone who holds things in unique ways to where if I were to try and explain them out loud someone might find me pitiful or feel sad for me because they think it comes from a certain place when really I was truly just born this way and wired a bit differently), but I do appreciate her talking about it and making it clear that even though she didn't and still doesn't think that deeply of this situation, it is still a disgusting situation and as the adult in it all, Cody, was really fking disgusting and gross for doing that. The Adult should not even be entertaining anything remotely close to sexual or intimate things with a child no matter how much the minor in question 'wants' or is ok with it, that is a dangerous Adult targeting a child for sexual pleasure and that is nothing to take lightly and Cody is disgusting for doing that. in the real world, we have well-established names for men like him, and this is a serious matter that shouldn't be swept under the rug just because they are TH-cam celebrities/influencers.
Being "mature for your age" doesn't mean your brain is older. It means you have faced so much shit that you have little in common anymore with people your actual age. And having nothing in common with other 17 year olds doesn't mean you have meaningful things in common with adults
I personally don't click with Tana, but differences aside, I always believe the victim. It was Cody's responsibility to say no. He was older than her. And Tana makes a great point, when she said she feels fine, even though this thing happened to her. Often times, society ignores the morality and the principles of sexual assault if the victim isn't traumatized. It's still BAD that an adult preyed on a young girl like this, regardless of how she feels about it.
i appreciate tana having a nuanced talk about how an act is still wrong/criminal, even if the person it happened to doesn’t label it as traumatic. people process things differently, and it’s not necessarily a requirement for someone to consider something wrong that happened to them to have been traumatic for them. as long as they’re not dismissing or downplaying others who’ve been through it and feel differently, then they can categorize their experience however feels appropriate for them. but that doesn’t mean that the other person should be given a free pass, because what they did was wrong regardless of the end result. we’re not here to scrutinize the minor’s point of view of what happened, we’re here to condemn the adult for choosing to sleep with someone who they knew to be a teenager. it doesn’t matter if the minor was ‘cool with it’, they’re not the one who should be judged, it was the grown adult’s responsibility to not commit a crime by taking advantage of someone who was forced to grow up too fast.
A really f’d up thing for me is Cody Ko looks like the guy who r-worded me (of course it WAS NOT Cody Ko!) and I couldn’t watch him and then stopped liking him after him and Noel said on their podcast something like ‘Andrew Tate is just getting his bag’ (I don’t remember the exactly what was said) and now this is coming out and it’s just… trippy in a way? Gives me like the heebie-jeebies 😰
society is so cruel to victims just because they like the person being accused. tana may not see much trauma in what happened to her specifically, but that doesn't make it any less evil. he knew exactly what he was doing and still did it anyway.
Unsubscribed from Cody and Noel once they had that super shitty annoying response to their sexism backlash. They aren’t real allies in any way and this proved it
People justifying what happened to Tana because of who she is gives the same energy as MGK justifying the weird stuff he said about Kylie Jenner when she was 17 with "she's a celebrity so it's different"
Tana (and Brooke) are the only influencers I have ever followed on socials, and it’s truly because i have such an immense respect for Tana. She has lived a LIFE so far by age 26, and it’s incredible to me how well spoken and eloquent she is when she speaks on trauma and her past experiences. I just think as a woman in her twenties, Tana is breaking down a lot of barriers and dispelling a lot of myths for others if that makes sense. She’s continually exposing Hollywood and the influencer sphere for what it truly is and it’s extremely refreshing. I always hope with everything in me that she has a great psychiatric team, and I’m so glad to see how close she remains to her chosen family and friends.
I💜the way he says tour, among other words. So much for telling stories no one else will hear, there was no way that was gonna work. They had to know that though.
I know they're youtubers and collabs were a big thing back then but why was a 25 year old collabing with a 17 year old in the first place? So gross. And that goes for the others too, like Shane Dawson.
When she talked about him reaching out to her the first time this picked up, that’s all I need to know. On top of his silence now, him saying “my wedding is coming up” is such a crazy guilt trip route to go
people who use the law to defend a person in their mid 20’s going after a teenager is wild. 18 or not, a 25 year old should not WANT to be with someone that age…and the people who don’t understand that scare me 🙃. good morals > what the law says is “okay”
What makes me MAD is how the internet picks and chooses when they care based on who’s involved. If its someone wildly loved everyone is on their side and wants to support them. If its someone wildly disliked like Tana people don’t have their back even though they are still a victim
Also cody makes the grossest crudest sexual jokes , and I'm just always kinda like 'okay do you expect your new born son to never be on the internet or r u okay with you child not being able to look at u .like' its so uncomfy
red flag fr fr poor kelsey maybe therapy can help them? he needs real remorse, care over what he says/promotes, care over who his friends are, better protection over his family
She makes such a good point of how people clearly have this black-and-white idea of what a good vs bad person is like, so they can't wrap their heads around how someone as likeable as Cody would have done something so horrible. It's crazy that despite knowing now that the halo effect exists and historically there have been vile people who went under the radar for so long due to being conventionally attractive or having a super agreeable personality, we still are facing the issue of people going "well he couldn't have done this, he's so nice." Humans are more complicated than that. Having a great sense of humor and making the disgusting choice of sleeping with a minor are not mutually exclusive.
When I was 15 I dated a 19 year old and even that age gap seems ridiculous to me now. Those few years take such a toll on your mental state- not to mention how much it affects your decision making
i think this whole situation could be so retraumatizing to tana. i didn’t realize how much trauma i held until 1-2 years after i was r*ped in college. i’m not trying to push my reaction on her, but i feel like her trying to bring this up randomly for years was her way of trying to move forward without knowing it. i feel so sad for her. i hate that she’s gone through so much and her being so open about her current sobriety journey feels like she’s only now processing why she reacted to her trauma the way she did/does
![🎤 ไปกันต่อออ! จับฉลากร้องเพลง x P’ #XXSIVK [EP.2] (1/2) เพลงของใครจึ้งสุดน้าา 💓🎤 #MXFRUIT](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/mLI_K0sAS4o/mqdefault.jpg)
Parasocial relationships are such a weird thing… “but he’s a nice guy!” … you watch heavily edited footage of this man. You don’t know him.
seriously. like yeah, its normal to feel let down that a creator you like is a shitty person, but i cant stand when people defend them so heavily. unless you have personally known them for YEARS (and i say years bc you can know someone for a year and not REALLY know anything) then you shouldn't say shit bc you dont know them.
and he's friends with Colby Leechman and had him in his wedding
He is a sigma, cry about it
@@10yearoldSigmaMale🌽🏀
you realize most men who clame to be nice guys are the most fucking weirdest strange ass perverts period 😅 that’s like saying james charles is a nice guy and not a creep sorry but what why would anyone want to defend perverts and creeps i just don’t get it
I was thinking how Emma Chamberlain met Cody at 17 and if it came out that they hooked up people would be horrified. But for some reason when it’s Tana nobody cares. It’s so messed up.
victim-blaming! a lot of girls act like tana in a response to being molested as a minor. instead of getting help, they get seen like they “deserved” it due to how they start acting when BOTH are the fault of the predator.
our society favors evil and punishes innocence. we can fight back if we educate ourselves and others!
I think it’s because at some points she has defended, worked with, and stood by abusers. Not saying it’s right…but it makes you less sympathetic. Not that it should take away from Cody’s actions, fuck him! It’s obnoxious that instead of just listening to her and taking action against Cody - it has to be a side-picking situation. Tana can be problematic sometimes, and Cody can be a predator. Two things can be true.
Who tf is Emma camberlan? Is she another generic looking influencer? Lol
@@goober112 how do u not know Emma chamberlain 😭😭😭
Adam talks about her all the time
When gabbie hanna is the voice of reason you are in serious trouble 😮
Gabbie has her moments
If i had a nickel for every time gabbie hanna is the voice of reason id have 2 nickels 😂
@@knitwitchpghwhat was the other time?
Lmao for real
A broken clock is still right twice a day
When I was 16, I dm’d a 23 year old, the older brother of a classmate, and began flirting. He was polite, but then checked my facebook and responded “how old are you…?” and i replied truthfully. He goes “You’re a beautiful girl, but you’re 16. Find a 16 year old guy who thinks you’re cool. I’m too old for you, I promise you’ll have no problems finding someone your age.” and then blocked me. HES SUCH A KING. And he was right!!!!! My husband is less than a month older than me. His bday is May 24 and mine is June 20 of the same year. I just wish every other 20+ guy i hit up as a teen was like the one who rejected me :(
See, people?! It shouldn't be hard to be a decent human being!
On a side note, I'm 15 days older than my bf and it's just so great. We live similar experiences at similar times, we grow together and we have a similar mindset. We disagree here and there, but having someone with a healthy and contemporary mentality on dating, disagreements and things like that is a 100/10.
That's how a decent guy responds, and I'm glad he did that. You know someone's a creep the moment they drop the "16 is the age of consent" argument. 14 used to be the age of consent in the UK till it was changed to 16 in 2008, and I'm pretty sure it used to be pretty normal amongst a few weirdos, but now it's illegal. So idk why 16 is fine and acceptable, even though it's only two years.
@@HusnaArtz2 Maybe it's similar to my country? Age of consent is 14 yo, BUT from 14 to 18, they can only consent in certain situations. If there's a power dynamic, if the older one uses their experience and/or the lack of experience of the minor to have sexual relations/force them to do anything, etc (and honestly, I struggle to think of a circumstance where an adult would not use the minor's lack of experience to force them/convince them to do stuff). The problem is that they are sometimes scared of reporting to the police or the police are too incompetent (which unfortunately tends to happen with all types of SA or r-pe).
I remember being 12 and crushing on a 14 year old. He told me I was too young for him 😂
At 22, it is actually revolting to think about doing that with a 17yo. Legit a high schooler. So messed up. It’s a crime for a reason
I always think about the amount of 20 something year olds that slept with girls in my school at 16/17 and wonder what kind of men they are now (I’m 30 now for context). ‘Everyone’ did it but of course that doesn’t make it okay.
@@helloimelsa239 I'm 46 now, and when I was in highschool, a lot of my friends when were as young as 15 or 16 were in relationships with men in their early to mid twenties. At the time, nobody seemed to care - not even parents of these girls - and in restrospect it's seriously horrifying. I hope that parents don't accept that kind of thing anymore.
literally this. im 24 and anyone like 19 and under is a fetus to me
Fr, I remember my friends thinking I was so cool at 15 cause my 20 year old boyfriend would pick me up from school... now I'm 28 and even at 20, I was like that wasn't cool... that was weird and I had no one in my corner to tell me it was weird of him to be attracted to me..
i’m 24, my best friend is 19 and I literally see her like a baby sister. I could never see anyone her age romantically. Shes fetal. I joke about her tripping over her umbilical cord
Hearing that Gabbie Hanna clocked it, and warned him, takes away all his deniability that he had
cope more foid
@@10yearoldSigmaMaleleast obvious rage bait channel, try harder next time
@@10yearoldSigmaMale this has got to be the worst rage bait ever, your username "10yearoldSigmaMale" doesn't help 😆
@@grimsyn8174 tbh I am actually 11 lol
@@ShilohXE I stopped being 10 two months ago but yea
Okay so I was a very dedicated Cody Ko fan for years. THE SECOND I heard this; blocked on everything. I’m sorry but we have to maintain consistency with everyone no matter if we are a fan or not. I wish people would stop pretending it’s hard not to COMMIT LITERAL SEX CRIMES ON WOMEN AND GIRLS. Period. End of.
or the “other people did worse” line
WORSE THAN SEXUAL CRIMES AGAINST CHILDREN?!?!?!
I'm so disappointed. I keep seeing his face and it feels so weird now. I'm now 25 yo and idk how anyone could even consider sleeping with a 17 yo.
Yeah, instant unsubscribe because what?!
Agreed
Same 😭😭 lunch time is very different now. I can’t look past this plus the Colby thing. If he made a video addressing both things I’d watch it sure, but otherwise I want nothing to do with him anymors
She was 17. He was 25.
It doesn’t matter if she stripped down naked, lit herself on fire, and jumped into his lap. It was his job to say no.
well said
THIS! the victim-blaming is unreal! trisha had a great point also, that she only acted in those ways (hyper sexual at too young) bc she was also touched sexually too young. Instead of seeing these women wrongly and thinking they deserve it, why don’t we look into the impact of childhood molestations and put the blame on the ACTUAL PREDATORS than the victims
but why? what if you want it
@@magikpotato it’s considered rap3 because of brain development research.that proves those age ranges don’t have access to parts of the brain that could even allow them true decision making.
it’s like making a decision without knowing all the details of what each choice means or comes with.
demi lovato was 17 with a 29 year old and was in love with him for many years. she wrote a song once she turned 29 with proper brain development and realized how wrong it was even though she *THOUGHT* she wanted it all along. one of her lines is “17 would never cross my mind” meaning as a 29 herself, she could NEVER be with someone that young admitting how wrong that is.
there is a reason humanity came up with terms like “grooming” to help understand this evil issue. the one being groomed believes they like it, they want it, they are not even a victim at all…. it takes “un-grooming” yourself which is similar to the process of “un-brainwashing” from a cult. you need distance away and time to process to see clearly. some people never see clearly even after they get away to not face the true weight of how bad it was but prefer to keep a form of delusion about it forever as a form of self-protection, but this actually causes worse damage later on
“the body keeps score” is a great book about how trauma can live on undetected as well as the dangers of unfaced trauma turning into physical ailments in later years.
@@k_singsss_1556 so age of consent should be 25, and age of going to the army 25, age of driving 25...
Cody Ko is fucking scary. How is that this situation is being talked about, yet Cody hasn’t seemed to receive any backlash?😭I don’t care much for Tana, but there are people saying she’s unreliable bc she’s a ‘drama seeker’ or smtg, like?? That doesn’t excuse Cody being 25 and sleeping with a 17y/o 🥲🫠
Tana is known for lying a lot. At least that is what I know her from. I personally believe her, but I can see why some may not just based on her history.
Tanas getting tons of victim blaming and thats just vile. She was a child.
thankfully on instagram people are flaming him in his comments. however like you said he has not addressed it which is so disturbing
Well apparently the parents didn't care.
I feel like Tana is known for being brutally honest? She can be dramatic, but she tells it how it is even when it gets her in
Hot water
this is obviously sickening on cody’s part, but more needs to be said about cody’s best man at his wedding, Colby Leachman. apparently he raped two women at Duke and recorded them. cody must have known about this and still considers a rapist a good enough friend to be his best man. makes me wonder if Kelsey also knew of this man’s past considering it was her wedding as well. 🤢
If we know, it’s safe to assume they know- also, he showed the video to his frat brothers so he mightve not only known about it but even been shown the video of his groomsman assaulting women.
literally so fucking disgusting bruhh. and he still follows him on instagram.
Those Duke boys don't know the meaning of no. Famously so in that area.
@@lavenderoh so disturbing! the fact that he went to trial and wasn’t found guilty is even more troubling and my heart goes out to those women 😔
@@ilikesmosh101 100% agree! So sick 🤢
Also even if Tana doesnt feel traumatized by it, he didnt know thats how she would react to his actions. He took advantage of a minor and risked potentially traumatizing her for life just for his own sick pleasure.
Like, when we watch things like to catch a predator, we never go "oh well even tho he tried to meet up with a minor in reality he failed and was talking to an undercover adult the whole time, so he's good". No, we recognize that attempting to do something harmful and failing by chance makes someone just as bad as if they succeeded. This cody l case is no different
And, to piggyback off of that, when she talks about how she subsequently went and hooked up with many and much older men, she doesn't seem to clock the fact that THAT could be her being traumatized. Maybe she would have behaved like that anyway, but I can't imagine being taken advantage of as a child FAN helped at all.
cry beta
@bobbii sure foid
YES thank you!!!
@@10yearoldSigmaMaleHaving a youtube gimmick account is extremely embarrassing.
I love how Cody reached out to her and didn't even ask if she was okay and just only cared about himself (as always) and brought up his wedding and everything.
and how he proposed to kelsey right after like,,,,,if i were kelsey i'd be so upset
Predators, abusers, rapists and people of that nature don’t see themselves as being in the wrong.
@@Ducky2613 wait did it happen while he was with Kelsey?
@@idkhtcmsittCody and Kelsey have been together a very long time. Unfortunately, yes.
@@alexisgee2314 tana and cody hooked up 2015; and cody and kelsey (according to insta) didn’t start dating until sep. 15 of 2017.
honestly, i feel bad for tana; as she’s the one having to re-process all of this. while i’m glad she doesn’t feel as though she’s been victimized, she was still a minor in a situation that she NEVER should have been in. and i feel bad for kelsey, ASSUMING she had no prior knowledge of this.
i had no idea who cody ko was until this whole thing came out, and as an almost 22 year old, i can’t even imagine befriending a 17 year old! let alone sleeping with one! this man was 25, had been ‘warned’ prior by another adult … and still chose to sleep with a minor. it’s vile!
I cannot stand Tana or her content. HOWEVER, it is so disgusting and gross what’s happened to her. For her to say “worst things have happened” is just so sad. I’ve loved Cody’s content for years, and she’s absolutely right. If he was a hated creator it would be different. There’s No excuses.
Edit: I’m not removing anything I’ve said. Instead I’ll add, even though I didn’t mean to. It comes off as insensitive for me to comment my feelings about Tana. She is the victim here, that’s what matters. Not any of the controversies.
The cannot stand tana or her content part was a little unnecessary. No one is going to assume you to be a super fan because you disagree with statutory rape
as others have pointed out, this is actually kind of a pattern of behaviour for cody, too. back when he was in college one of his frat buddies raped a woman, then invited other members of their frat up to rape her whilst he recorded the whole ordeal. following this, said-offender went on to show numerous others from their frat this video and has even been taken to court over it (though, it was extremely difficult for the victim to get the ball rolling on this, because he's a duke nepo baby).
cody remains his friend to this day, and even featured him as a part of his wedding party. most of cody's audience is staunchly-against this behaviour, so it's pretty crazy to watch in real time how people will completely bend and contort their morals just to feel justified in defending a random person who doesnt even know they exist
@@zaddyfaye6880what???
I completely agree!
@@zaddyfaye6880what?!… where can I look into this?
The “hey are we ok? I just have a lot coming up for me” text is so so sick.
Knowing you won’t be believed if you come forward because the person who SA’d you is so well liked and loved is truly one of the most difficult burdens to carry
This. Been through it. It’s so isolating and such an emotional burden. You feel like the only one in the world who knows the truth.
i'd literally never wish that on anyone. i hope tana gets the justice she rightfully deserves and is able to heal from all that horrible bullshit :(
She keeps reiterating that it was just the lifestyle she had at the time. That makes me wonder if her environment groomed her to not associate hurt or trauma with things that are extremely wrong. Like she was prepped to not internalize these interactions because she started yt at 15. That brings in many other encounters that were probably unsafe, its like it tore down her guard and internal protection for herself to allow other things to happen to her without emotional pushback.
yes if this is normal to her , there must be more we don’t know about
Yes so true. And I think it also just reflects society’s hatred towards women who don’t act the way they want us to
the interactions she had w shane dawson on camera were weird as hell. i can only imagine how weird he was w her behind the scenes.
esp bc shane was also weird with trevi moran when she was a minor as well
It is clear in her old collabs w men, she is seen as an object. The way they treated her as a claim for fame and normalised it bc it's "Tana". What makes it worse is, it is obviously her childhood trauma that made her believe it's fine.
The thing is ppl calling tana dirty, sl*tty or whatever, clearly never met anyone who went through extreme trauma at a young age. She shows the real side.
Exactly, this is such a good point.
It’s even more disgusting because tana had been through so much and was definitely so vulnerable. They were also collabing and working together, so it so creepy and unprofessional on Cody’s part, even if she was of age. It’s crazy that Cody is just ignoring something so serious and something that is clearly traumatic in some way to Tana.
cry about it foid
@@10yearoldSigmaMalefoid? excuse you
@@geoxoxo2414 cry some more and make me a sandwich foid
@@geoxoxo2414 get on your knees foid
@@geoxoxo2414 cry
This entire situation has honestly made me feel so unsafe around straight men. Like Tana talking about how it would be so much easier if the predator in the situation was already disliked is so real because a lot of men won't turn on each other even when they do the most heinous shit.
cry some more
@@rmac02 Dude, shut the hell up.
Exactly
@rmac02 oh stop it 🛑 u KNOW we live in a world that excuses straight cis men's behavior. that doesn't apply to other demographics, so it's not comparable.
this comment is giving male apologist.
When I was 17 I was dating a 25 year old. He even proposed! I said no n ran far far away. I look back n feel so gross about it still to this day. I'm 30.
Love or Hate Tana or Cody. But it’s just straight up wrong that Cody as a 25 year old man could sleep with a 17 year old girl. He straight up took advantage of her even if she didn’t feel taken advantage of she definitely was. And the fact Gabbie Hanna took the time to tell him that Tana was a kid and he shouldn’t. He’s a criminal and a creep. He’s a father now and is married to a woman who use to be a teacher.
As those creepy mf always are
@user-xr7ci8tf3e jesus
Im codys age. And 28 is my minimum age. And it bumps up every year, i cant imagine dating someone 25 let alone be 25 and attracted to a high schooler.
im not even 25 but i have a younger sister in hs and if someone my age or older was going after her or her friends… immediate jail time!!
Im his same age too and I remember being grossed out with myself for going on a date with a 21 year old when I was 24. He wanted a 17 year old?!?!?! 🤢 They’re still BARELY adults and we absolutely knew better back then. So relieved I could never get into his content
Same, I'm 25 and I think 23 is the lowest Id go lol
i'm only 20 and would never even think of being attracted to anyone in or just graduating high school...it's so disgusting
cry about it beta
I'm so happy her cohost said everything I was thinking too and she worded so well what Tana needed and deserved to hear in the moment.
yeah she was being very sweet
I’m convinced the reason he won’t say anything is because he knows if he does his career is fucked.
thinking of how he’s gonna keep providing for baby
have another plan maybe? 🤦🏻♀️
@@k_singsss_1556he’s rich enough if he can blow 25k out of his pocket for a music video 😤
@@k_singsss_1556 plan a: don’t commit crimes
@@109digitsofpi if you did commit crimes, like cody, make another plan besides online content creator considering no longer an appropriate role model
The only way he could keep a shred of dignity and claim that he changed as a person since then, in my eyes, would be to remove himself from his career permanently and like become a monk or something. I really hope we are at a point with the internet where we let him fall off because we don't like kid diddlers and we don't let people sweep things like this under the rug and move on. I was a fan, but no longer.
I relate to Tana's feelings about this heavily. I was in a relationship with a 20 year old when I was 15 which is wild to think about. Literally a lot of adults knew we were together and didn't care because we both went to church? Like insane shit to think about. But I don't even associate that with a traumatic event at all, it just was what it was. I know it was bad, and I still side eye the dude, but for some reason am so desensitized to it. I do not care for Tana, and was a Cody Ko fan, but I absolutely believe her.
Yes I had similar experiences as a teen and it was totally normalized in my life I didn’t think it was weird. I think many women have had these experiences and it is honestly sad to realize
When I was growing up it was no big deal nor unusual for a 20 year old guy to date a 15 year old girl.
Society didn’t care so we can’t now look back and hate the men for it.
Rules have changed and it’s no longer acceptable. You need to judge based on the time period.
I have no idea how long ago your instance was but I’m guessing it wasn’t that long ago, making it worse than if it happened decades ago.
@@organiclady it should be inherent not to be attracted to a 15 year old as a 20 year old. biologically and psychologically. without societal rules. rules created by perverted men in the first place.
So I’m seeing now that one of Cody’s groomsmen SA’d at least two women and videoed and shared it. And I adored Cody prior to Tana’s story coming out. He’s going to take the Nikita Dragun route and just not address it unless he’s forced to. His latest IG post is full of fans telling him to answer for it. Not so much on Kelsey’s (which I understand, she’s a new mother and the burden isn’t on her). Unfortunately, unless the pressure builds I don’t see him having to answer for this.
Who’s the groomsman ??
@@Ryliemei23Colby Leachmen
@@Carriesue1982 tyy
Honestly, I feel for Kelsey. She just had a child and I'm hoping she didn't know about this before. Like what do you even do in this situation? Leave as a new mother and with the salary of a teacher? Stay? Damn.
@@ItsJustValHereshe apparently went to leachman's fiancé's bachlorette party recently. idk how she wouldn’t know about it.
Tana is really starting to unravel her trauma and is doing it in such a mature way for herself compared to what she used to do. I really think she has started to come into a comprehensible stage in life and it will take time for her to understand what happened to her, wasn’t her fault or her actions that brought these events on.
I just said this with jojo to a friend, if these problematic kids can grow up, mature, and learn, ill make space for their growth. Tana was a kid for the start of her career and i think about 19 year old me i would not have organized tanacon well either. Adults did fail her. And i hope shes learned sooo much and heals.
25 is when your frontal lobe gets fully developed so it doesn't surprise me at all 💀
i hope she's doing well.
@@FlamingTurtleCake right?! so it makes it even worse that Cody took advantage of her at his age knowing she was 17
Tana’s situation really reminds me of Demi Lovato’s song “29” where she said “17 would never cross my mind.” It’s sick. I’m glad Tana is okay and isn’t traumatized ❤️
what does the lyric signify? /gen
@@salmansdriver9561 Demi Lovato got into a relationship with a man when she was 17, and he was 29. She’s basically saying now that she is 29, she would never even think about dating a 17 year old. I hope this helps! I highly recommend listening to it 😊
@@Emma_78 thank you for explaining! it's very unfortunate how common these kinds of experiences us for us... i will listen to the song, i really like her voice
@@salmansdriver9561 no problem 😊
It’s so disappointing to me that he’s facing zero repercussions. I’ve been a fan for years and I stopped watching him point blank period. I can’t believe the rest of the fans don’t care.
It’s possible that they don’t even know. This is the first time I’m hearing about this and it’s so incredibly saddening and disappointing to hear about this. I can’t look at him the same anymore.
@@storm_clxudsfor sure a lot of them don’t know. it’s being pushed down so much. like adam said, even his subreddit is blocking tana’s name. so sad and disappointing
same i was a big fan too but after that i stopped watching altogether i dont know how he has 0 repercussions
It's the same on the Reddit too. People are getting banned for even saying Tana's name. If he wants to seem innocent this is the worst way to do it
I’ve also been a fan for a while and it’s really surprising honestly. I just feel weird watching his videos knowing what happened. First it was Griffinilla now this
it sickens me how people excuse the possibility of this act happening to tana by sayint that shes problematic. there are no perfect victims, and women who are seen as attention seeking can be saed just like anyone else
Exactly
@@ghostinthecity yeah isn't it also weird how he hung out with her a couple of years ago too? he's 10 years older than her lol
An extra creepy aspect is that an 8 year age gap would have been the equivalent to HALF of 17yo Tana’s life. Barf
As someone that’s been through heavy trauma, I can empathize with experiencing something and thinking it’s “not that bad” but there’s also a very real trauma that comes with looking back on something and feeling gross about it because now you know how bad it was. I really wish Tana the best and I hate that people are blaming her.
trauma is tricky. her brain could be protecting her from most of the feelings related to it still through dissociation
just because we can’t access our full feelings, doesn’t mean it didn’t harm us
recommend “the body keeps score” book on trauma ❤
And once you've unpacked and actually processed the heavier trauma, that's when the unprocessed, less obvious trauma comes to the surface. which means often feelings change, from "this was fine" to "this was actually horrible" but there's some idea of "oh, I told him we're good, I've said publicly I'm not traumatized by this" because it's all RELATIVE to whatever trauma is currently at the forefront of the mind!
I hate how so many people just assume that someone is a good person just because they are a liked influencer or celebrity. This worship culture is disgusting. Thank you for talking about this.
HE and Noel lost me when I saw a clip of their podcast giggling about how they saw a poor teenage girl get harrased at a Starbucks by a grown man and they did nothing to stop it
what's the clip?
Haven't seen this could you link it ?
What people don't get is Tana actually was sexually groomed by so many different men before she was an adult. That's why she acts the way she does, that's why she's so promiscuous (nothing wrong with an adult being promiscuous btw) why she is the person she is. Trauma has sculpted her, it's also why she's problematic and defends predators and bad people sometimes. Also why she acts like a highschooler even though she's older/ bout the same age as I am. Look to Trisha as an example of what sexual trauma can do to you and the way you act/treat others.
Trauma doesn't excuse the things she's done or said but it is an explanation and foresight into why she's practically excusing what happened to her specifically and why she talks about how she was with other guys, like her bringing up sleeping with 30+ yo's. It doesn't excuse how she was treated. Not that there needs to be a reason not to treat someone that way, but in no way shape or form was she asking for Cody to pursue her or take advantage of her even if she was the one making advances. In no way did she deserve it and whether she sees it as it or not, it's trauma. Tana pushes all sexual trauma to the "consensual" file to cope. I did the same thing, why I didn't realize until this year that I've been SA'd and (statutory) r8ped when I was 15.
It's kinda like "boys will be boys" mentality.
"Cody is fine for taking advantage of Tana cause she was the one coming onto him and she's beautiful and how can he resist" it's no different from saying
"ya that 5yo was asking for it cause she was wearing a cute dress and playing alone and she was really friendly and cute so he couldn't control himself."
1. disgusting and horrible mentality, if men can't control themselves they need to be put down like the dogs they are (obviously not all men we're talking about predators rn)
2. I think we need to give some men a little more credit because probably a majority of men aren't like this. I know a large amount are, but most are not and it shouldn't be the norm to excuse horrible behavior when the majority aren't committing these disgusting acts.
Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk, didn't mean for it to be this long 😭thanks for anyone who made it to the end😅
thank you!!! trying to put this education out there also! trisha touched on this
it makes me sick how society thinks. the victim blaming is insane.
if a boy is getting hit at home and he becomes aggressive(bc children model the behavior), would society think that kid just “deserves” to get beat up in the future also bc he’s a “bad boy” ?!?!?! NO (reactionary abuse is more like self defense especially in a CHILD)
so why if a girl got molested at a young age and then starts acting more sexual(bc children model behavior), would society think she “deserves” to be sexually assaulted in the future also bc she’s a “bad girl” ………………
how about we blame the cause instead of the outcome, adults instead of children, predators instead of victims.
my, my what a fallen world humanity has made…
Here's an actual argument that the predator my parents (whom I don't talk to for this and numerous other abuse related reasons) are still friends with used in court, after SAing two pre teens (including his daughter's best friend) for three years used in actual court: "She wanted it, because she moved her pelvis when I touched her" and "The Bible says that if a woman lies with a man in the town and doesn't cry out, she wants to lie with him." Yeah, fuck that guy. He got six years, let out in 3. And he had an affair with their mother too. She knew, didn't do a thing, and faced no consequences. I fortunately have never had anything that bad. I know I'm downplaying, but I do compare, I can't help it. But I was groomed and gr*ped by a man in his eighties when I was 14. My mother knew and didn't do anything until everyone else started to notice and expressed concerns to her. Then she accused me of having an affair with him. I'm trauma dumping - sorry
@@rachelstanger6079 honey no, you're allowed to tell your story however you need, in whatever context. That is so horrible and I'm sorry, just remember it wasn't ever your fault and your trauma matters just as much as any other survivor.
I am also someone who compares trauma unfortunately. I grew up in an abusive household and am pretty antisocial as a result, I found someone who treated me nicely but was 18 (I was 15) and dated him, expressed I didn't wanna do anything yet he.. did anyway. I know it's not as horrible and traumatic as most victims stories yet I can still acknowledge its smth that shouldn't have happened and that was wrong, I never realized until I spoke about it in therapy as an adult.
I think it's only natural to compare trauma to minimize your own pain and thus protect yourself from the trauma. I've always minimized anything bad happening to me as "well I've had worse so" or "other people are dealing with worse" I think it's a type of trauma response.
Don't ever apologize for talking about your story though, we're survivors, not victims.
you worded this perfectly
The majority is like this hun.
This situation with Tana and Cody Ko has me heavily reflecting on my own experiences.
When I was 16yo I was sleeping with a man who was 26. I was in high school, partying and getting high constantly, and he was a grown man who had just gotten back home from his most recent deployment in the army. He was my best friend's (who was 2 years older than me) boyfriend's brother.
I hadn't thought about it in years, and saying I understand where Tana is coming from as far as not considering it as "real" trauma is an understatement.
At the time, I had already been sexually assaulted, was being groomed by another man in his late 30s, and had just been raped by 3 older men in their early 20s who I had trusted.
And I went on to endure worse. I am a survivor of being trafficked.
So when I think back to those encounters with the 26yo army man I never looked back in anger and hurt.
This whole thing has me really thinking about that relationship (if you can even call it that) and how disgusting it was.
my heart goes out to you, and I really hope you are healing from these brutal events. i hope you are safe and surrounded by support and love now.
jesus dude where were your parents? I'm so sorry ❤
Cody ko is a massive weirdo if it wasnt Tana and another girl or influencer with a better track record with the public people wouldnt be defending Cody Ko. Its disturbing that people are okaying it because its tana its not okay and its illegal
Cody is also close friends with an SA. He was in Cody’s wedding, Colby Leechman
I think the saddest thing i found out is she would have had to report him within a year for a misdemeanor or three for a felony of the event. I cant believe theres a statute for statutory
There is a statute for straight up SA too in a lot of states too if I remember correctly. Or at least there used to be.
this prevents so much justice bc MOST victims need that time to process, regain the ability to speak for self, rebuild health, rebuild finances/life, get to an okay enough position to even take on a mountain like that.
@@k_singsss_1556 Ya but it also prevents justice from being poorly excuted. I am not agreeing with his actions just saying yall act like these things exsist just to fuck over women as if there is no logic to the justice system.
@@TheLostOne232 strange bc forensics can develop over time and cause re-openings of cold cases from decades before. may not be the best because witnesses remember less and other factors… but it’s still justice even if years later.
this should be the mentality for everything.
it takes years to process the victim hood, get help, get financially okay, etc to fight back against most abusers.
@k_singsss_1556 1, where in this situation is forensic required ? She is not claiming to have been raped. Furthermore, the example you brought up still requires a crime to be reported in a timely manner in order to then rely on advancements in science and technology. It is very crucial to report crimes as early as possible so that the appropriate evidence can be compiled. Even if current technology can't solve it, perhaps future technology can. Nothing I have said disagrees with your mindset.
Ngl your intonation on "but it's still hot as BALLS in here!" Had me cracking up
Not every person who is robbed at gun point will be traumatized. Some will experience trauma and some will not. However, all have had a crime committed against them. And in each case, the "robber" knowingly chose to commit that crime, aware of the possibility it could cause trauma.
this! i’ve been attacked by two dogs; one bit my arms and stomach and another bit my face. Only the first one traumatized me. The week after the second attack happened, I was rolling in the grass with the dog who’d bitten my face. Still love him to this day. Its all relative!
louis mcclung's video had this segment about cody ko's friend from college that he still associates with, and its very telling of his morals and where he draws the line (or doesnt)
i’m a small streamer and when i was 17 a 29 year old, with a much larger audience than me, groomed me & initiated a sexual relationship with me. i relate to tana so much with my thought process. i was a fan of his and he knew that, he knew i was a minor and still initiated everything with me. i didn’t realize i had been groomed until i saw allegations from another fan saying he was pressure her to talk about sexual things with him and she was about 10 years younger than him. i realized that if a legal adult is uncomfortable with their age gap then what he did to me was definitely not okay so i wrote an anonymous twitlonger about my experience mainly because i knew there were other minors in his community and i wanted to protect them. for a while i wasn’t sure how to feel about it and felt guilty for ruining his career as he was a full time content creator. i’m now 20 and realize just how much that relationship affected me.
I don't know if you need to read this, but just in case: I don't know who you are and I don't know who you're talking about, but his career being ruined is NOT your fault. It's a consequence of his own actions. I know it's not easy to stop feeling guilty, but it's a process.
I don’t know how people live without air conditioning. I truly get sick if it’s too hot.
Temperature intolerance is physically horrible
I feel you ladies. I am thankful, I got over my intolerance😂
tana may have done a lot of shitty things in the past, but what happened to her was fucking awful. i feel for her so deeply and it’s disgusting how people have reduced this whole situation down to “oh it’s just tana”
NO ONE DESERVES THAT! AND MOST GIRLS START ACTING LIKE TANA’S BEHAVIORS FROM BEING MOLESTED AT A VERY YOUNG AGE. TRISHA TALKED AB THIS
WHY CANT MORE PEOPLE REALIZE THIS?! HOW DO WE GET TO A POINT WHERE WE VICTIM-BLAME AS A SOCIETY ⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️
People's obsession with the "perfect victim" is baffling
It all makes sense now, all her past behaviours could be correlated to the amount abuse she was put through I hope she heals
@@greenthinggg i hope she finds healing too ❤️
@@greenthinggg YES! I truly believe that ALL girls who act promiscuous were groomed to act that way.
no one is born overly sexual.
society has got to stop with the blame and shame. start actually helping and healing!
What’s sad is if it was Jake Paul there would already be a Washington post article
Jake Paul got away with abusing Alissa violet. Even men with bad reputations are given the benefit of the doubt
13:04 I’ve seen so much maturity in tana in her response here. very proud of her.
I feel for Tana when she talks about how relatively this isn’t traumatic for her. I also appreciate that she recognizes that is her own journey and how just because this wasn’t as impactful for her as other events, it is still bad. Both can be true at the same time and it can be hard to come to terms with that
Although in life we grow and learn many lessons, NO ONE ever deserves to be groomed or taken advantage of as a minor. It breaks my heart.
NO SERIOUSLY THIS SUMMER HAS BEEN SO HOT IT'S CRAAAZY
And winter was cold af
@@theoutsiderjess1869 Not in the Northeast U.S.
It's giving me flashbacks to 2022, that summer was awful!
@@DefyReality-ll2cg ikr I'm dying !!
just remember it's the coolest summer of the rest of our lives 😍
I think most people knew that Tana was vulnerable to these things due to trauma. It’s horrible to see that used against her
“You might hear a fan in the background”
*me waiting to hear a fan screaming in the background* 😐
So I was groomed by a 23 year old when I was 15. We were together for 8 years. At this point we’ve been broken up for about 6 years- I am 29 years old and just now really processing what happened to me. For awhile I would still occasionally talk to my ex. But now it makes me feel physically nauseous to think about them and I do not want to be reminded of them at all. Tana may feel differently as she processes things that have happened to her and whatever she is feeling is valid. I am just glad she has support ❤
I'm so sorry for you. but also i always wonder why your parents didn't intervene?
@@sainttheresetaylor2054 that’s a fair question.
The person who groomed me is my best friend’s cousin. We met because I went on a trip on summer vacation with my best friend and her family. Before I went on the trip, my mom told me that my dad was moving to another state and that when I got back we would be moving in with my grandma.
That’s a lot of unnecessary details, but basically I was 15 and about to have a lot of life changes happening, and that made it very easy for someone manipulative to swoop in and get to work.
I put in a lot of effort to hide it from my mom and she was going through a hard time herself. By the time she was aware that this person had bad intentions, I was 18 and she did try to talk sense into me without pushing me away completely.
There are definitely plenty of adults that should have stepped in throughout the entirety of that situation, and I obviously do not think my parents are blameless. But I would also not be quick to assume that anyone that has a child that experiences this is a bad parent.
Also, thank you for your comment! I have been apprehensive to talk openly about this issue good practice for me.
I think we have leaps and bounds to go in learning that people who loved and are dear to us are capable of committing crimes.
THIS! during me too movement I learned how many people I knew personally were rapists. a lot of them, the women could not speak up bc the predators were well liked in the community. this is a MAJOR problem
also side note if you’re 25 and find yourself in circles with 17 year olds you should question that immediately like i don’t even know any children besides my family😭
THIS
I had to stop being friends with my ex male best friend of 10 years. He had been hiding it from me. It was really sad
I can really resonate with her point of view around feeling like she was just having fun because I had “relations” with older men from 16-17 years old. My first boyfriend was 21 and I was just turning 16 for an example. I don’t see myself as a victim either so I just get what she means so much. As a mom with a daughter I would never allow her to be with a man when she is a child so I know it’s wrong but I still don’t see my situation as a victim situation so I really do get what she is saying.
part of the huge problem (and why it’s illegal) is BECAUSE brains that age in development can’t see with full clarity in their own situations even if it feels that way. it is like being under a spell. sometimes the spell can have residue into adulthood to never really see the real issues.
highly rec book “the body keeps score” even if we don’t feel our trauma, it is in there somewhere & it can cause real health problems if ignored for too many years. many ways to release inner, trapped trauma that you may not even realize is there.
best wishes ❤
My opinion on people saying “this adult doesn’t have anything in common with this minor, why do they want to be friends with a minor” is that i think firstly, I think that phrasing creates a generational gap where both sides think that they have nothing in common with the other, and thus when an adult DOES have something in common with a minor, the minor feels special and is more at risk of being groomed. And second, I think it’s important for minors to have friends who are normal adults not trying to groom them because then they have an idea what a friendship with an adult is SUPPOSED to be like and recognize the warning signs when they’re being groomed.
Of course, these kinds of friendships with inherent power dynamics requires the adult to maintain proper boundaries with the minor - you can have a friendship with a minor who’s a fan of something you’re a fan of or whatever, but it’s the adult’s responsibility to make sure that they don’t treat them like they would their fellow adult friends and keep the friendship about the shared interests instead of personal topics
well said
This is so random, but the way Brittany Broski collaborated with him and not Tana.. and then probably won’t speak out about this. 🙃
It's gross that people discount and don't believe women for literally any reason... and it's so gross how Cody's capitalized off of this "good guy" persona. It's really simple to just unsubscribe from someone and not support someone the moment allegations come out. I swear the fans are bending over backwards trying to not only protect a rapist, but also the whole situation with Cody and Kelsey having a rapist (Colby Leachman, who should have been convicted) in their wedding party. He's rich beyond belief and I'm sure isn't addressing the issue because he's been advised legally not to, but it's disgusting as hell to see him still coming out with videos. All he cares about his money. And all his fans care about is trying to protect his image and convince others he's a changed man now because he has a family. Fuck that.
I love Tana just being so fucking real about it, and I'm glad that she's able to be honest about how it has or hasn't made her feel.
12:18 the fact that people are saying, “but it’s Tana mongeau” is genuinely so disgusting :(
To insinuate she deserved it bc of her “lifestyle” (e.g., she talks about sex, she’s popular, she struggled with substance abuse disorder), truly shows how people degrade and punish women.
I know she’ll never see this but TANA!!!!😭😭😭 you are worthy of being protected, defended, loved, considered, respected, nurtured, and SO MUCH MORE. You did NOT deserve what happened to you. NO ONE deserves to be victimized. I’m so sorry this happened to you.
not to mention that “lifestyle” (i also hate that word lol) usually comes from trauma like the hypersexuality & substance issues. everyone wants a perfect victim that rarely ever exists
I was 16 when I got into a relationship with a 20 year old. To this day, I don't understand wtf was wrong with that guy
My ex and I were the same ages as her and him and I ended up married to him for 7 incredibly shitty years because he knew how easy it was to manipulate a literal child. I can’t even look at Cody Ko anymore. It makes my skin crawl.
There is truly a lot of darkness in the TH-camr scene Tana was basically groomed by Cody while I don’t always agree with her and she went off the rails herself later on I am glad Gabbie said something to Cody to at least try to stop or discourage him. But this truly makes me think how dark the big TH-camr scene is/was.
Just because you can doesn't mean you should.
People who are so quick to say BUT IT'S LEGAL need to looking in to
It would be like if DV was legal again, they’d be joking about how it’s ok to hit your wife 😒 Not that people don’t do that already…
I feel that sitting in front of the fan, I am currently sitting right beside my vent trying not to melt from the heat 😭
Do you guys remember when Jake Paul confronted Cody Ko and everyone thought he was crazy for it. He was dating Tana back then, it's so weird.
😂 I doooooo
Regarding this summer being so hot, reminds me of that one Simpson’s meme that’s like: this is the COLDEST summer of the rest of your life we are quite literally cooked
Tana and I are the same age so I’ve always cut her some slack because even though we are different people I can kinda understand her mindset due to the fact our minds are developed somewhat at a similar rate. I think over the years we’ve learned so much about what she’s been through and maybe why she is the way she is. I’m not above shaking my head at her from time to time but I just think Tana is owed a lot more empathy than she receives. And it broke my heart to see her refer to other victims as real victims because even she isn’t grant herself the grace that she sometimes deserves.
it's so crazy, why can't people understand that even
"loved" people can be WRONG, he is very wrong for sleeping with her and it's even more wrong to reach out and try and guilt trip her! WTF? he needs to address it and own up to it. PERIOD
I hate how all the cody kringe fans are just letting this all slide... it makes me sick to my stomach.
legitimately. like i have been a cody and a tana fan since i was a child and the second i hear about this i stop watching him. it’s not that hard his content isn’t that good anyways
We have been getting 95° days already here in eastern North Carolina. ITS HOT AND HUMID!! But thankfully we have a/c cause I could not do it without
She doesn’t need to be traumatized for it to be wrong‼️
I mean as much as im uninterested in Tana, and have only watched other people talk about things she has done (so my perception ain't really that high of her) I am glad she spoke up about it because it helps put in perspective that even if she did 'consent' this and 'had fun' or whatever, is a problem of the adult in the situation and this is not ok. it's just too irreversibly irresponsible to go on and defend that dangerous adult just because the child in the situation may not have found it to be bad or traumatizing, the point is the adult is targeting children for sexual acts period and that is not and never will be ok.
I also don't think anyone online has a right to tell Tana how she *should* feel about this situation (as someone who holds things in unique ways to where if I were to try and explain them out loud someone might find me pitiful or feel sad for me because they think it comes from a certain place when really I was truly just born this way and wired a bit differently), but I do appreciate her talking about it and making it clear that even though she didn't and still doesn't think that deeply of this situation, it is still a disgusting situation and as the adult in it all, Cody, was really fking disgusting and gross for doing that. The Adult should not even be entertaining anything remotely close to sexual or intimate things with a child no matter how much the minor in question 'wants' or is ok with it, that is a dangerous Adult targeting a child for sexual pleasure and that is nothing to take lightly and Cody is disgusting for doing that.
in the real world, we have well-established names for men like him, and this is a serious matter that shouldn't be swept under the rug just because they are TH-cam celebrities/influencers.
Being "mature for your age" doesn't mean your brain is older. It means you have faced so much shit that you have little in common anymore with people your actual age.
And having nothing in common with other 17 year olds doesn't mean you have meaningful things in common with adults
I personally don't click with Tana, but differences aside, I always believe the victim. It was Cody's responsibility to say no. He was older than her. And Tana makes a great point, when she said she feels fine, even though this thing happened to her. Often times, society ignores the morality and the principles of sexual assault if the victim isn't traumatized. It's still BAD that an adult preyed on a young girl like this, regardless of how she feels about it.
i appreciate tana having a nuanced talk about how an act is still wrong/criminal, even if the person it happened to doesn’t label it as traumatic. people process things differently, and it’s not necessarily a requirement for someone to consider something wrong that happened to them to have been traumatic for them. as long as they’re not dismissing or downplaying others who’ve been through it and feel differently, then they can categorize their experience however feels appropriate for them. but that doesn’t mean that the other person should be given a free pass, because what they did was wrong regardless of the end result. we’re not here to scrutinize the minor’s point of view of what happened, we’re here to condemn the adult for choosing to sleep with someone who they knew to be a teenager. it doesn’t matter if the minor was ‘cool with it’, they’re not the one who should be judged, it was the grown adult’s responsibility to not commit a crime by taking advantage of someone who was forced to grow up too fast.
Ngl I fucking love Trish and Tana tho they had a new concept TTT! Tana and Trish time travel together tell me that’s not hilarious
that sounds funny as hell😂❤
A really f’d up thing for me is Cody Ko looks like the guy who r-worded me (of course it WAS NOT Cody Ko!) and I couldn’t watch him and then stopped liking him after him and Noel said on their podcast something like ‘Andrew Tate is just getting his bag’ (I don’t remember the exactly what was said) and now this is coming out and it’s just… trippy in a way? Gives me like the heebie-jeebies 😰
society is so cruel to victims just because they like the person being accused. tana may not see much trauma in what happened to her specifically, but that doesn't make it any less evil. he knew exactly what he was doing and still did it anyway.
Unsubscribed from Cody and Noel once they had that super shitty annoying response to their sexism backlash. They aren’t real allies in any way and this proved it
bestie please also mention cody is STILL friends with colby leachman... PLEASE..
I can’t go outside without crying WHY IS IT SO HOT
I stopped going outside. Will resume in September/October. 😂
People justifying what happened to Tana because of who she is gives the same energy as MGK justifying the weird stuff he said about Kylie Jenner when she was 17 with "she's a celebrity so it's different"
Tana (and Brooke) are the only influencers I have ever followed on socials, and it’s truly because i have such an immense respect for Tana. She has lived a LIFE so far by age 26, and it’s incredible to me how well spoken and eloquent she is when she speaks on trauma and her past experiences. I just think as a woman in her twenties, Tana is breaking down a lot of barriers and dispelling a lot of myths for others if that makes sense. She’s continually exposing Hollywood and the influencer sphere for what it truly is and it’s extremely refreshing. I always hope with everything in me that she has a great psychiatric team, and I’m so glad to see how close she remains to her chosen family and friends.
I💜the way he says tour, among other words. So much for telling stories no one else will hear, there was no way that was gonna work. They had to know that though.
I love so many of Adam's pronunciations. What a beautiful accent.
Really wish you would talk about Colby Leechman :(
I know they're youtubers and collabs were a big thing back then but why was a 25 year old collabing with a 17 year old in the first place? So gross.
And that goes for the others too, like Shane Dawson.
When she talked about him reaching out to her the first time this picked up, that’s all I need to know. On top of his silence now, him saying “my wedding is coming up” is such a crazy guilt trip route to go
Cody Ko also needs the call out dr kid inspect is getting
people who use the law to defend a person in their mid 20’s going after a teenager is wild. 18 or not, a 25 year old should not WANT to be with someone that age…and the people who don’t understand that scare me 🙃. good morals > what the law says is “okay”
What makes me MAD is how the internet picks and chooses when they care based on who’s involved. If its someone wildly loved everyone is on their side and wants to support them. If its someone wildly disliked like Tana people don’t have their back even though they are still a victim
Also cody makes the grossest crudest sexual jokes , and I'm just always kinda like 'okay do you expect your new born son to never be on the internet or r u okay with you child not being able to look at u .like' its so uncomfy
red flag fr fr
poor kelsey
maybe therapy can help them? he needs real remorse, care over what he says/promotes, care over who his friends are, better protection over his family
I get age gap relationships between consenting adults, but a 17 year old and 25 year old is disgusting and illegal
FR THO ITS 105 HERE IN SAC, CA!!!! Its insanely hot, and its not even that bad since july is the hottest month
omg im from sac too! did u see its gonna be over 100 every day next week… i almost cried😭😭😭
@@victorianator The AC bill is going to be through the roof the next month😭😭😭
the fan in the background is me yelling "OMG I'M SO EARLY" all the way to the UK
😂😂😂
She makes such a good point of how people clearly have this black-and-white idea of what a good vs bad person is like, so they can't wrap their heads around how someone as likeable as Cody would have done something so horrible. It's crazy that despite knowing now that the halo effect exists and historically there have been vile people who went under the radar for so long due to being conventionally attractive or having a super agreeable personality, we still are facing the issue of people going "well he couldn't have done this, he's so nice." Humans are more complicated than that. Having a great sense of humor and making the disgusting choice of sleeping with a minor are not mutually exclusive.
tana stays glowing
When I was 15 I dated a 19 year old and even that age gap seems ridiculous to me now. Those few years take such a toll on your mental state- not to mention how much it affects your decision making
Yeah but it also heavily depends on when you start hooking up/ dating
i literally have a cody ko concert to go to next month… 😭
Sell your ticket and treat yourself to something nice!
Nah, just go. See what happens and if he says anything about it! Try to record whatever you can!!
@@TheKatarinaGiselleoooh, I second this!
refund possible?
go and just yell from the crowd the whole time “TALK ABOUT TANA”
i think this whole situation could be so retraumatizing to tana. i didn’t realize how much trauma i held until 1-2 years after i was r*ped in college. i’m not trying to push my reaction on her, but i feel like her trying to bring this up randomly for years was her way of trying to move forward without knowing it. i feel so sad for her. i hate that she’s gone through so much and her being so open about her current sobriety journey feels like she’s only now processing why she reacted to her trauma the way she did/does
Haha I love Adam but the “heatwave” hitting London is crazyyyy. 78• F is such a LOVELY day here 😅
It's 78 at nighttime here in the states. 😂
It's because all our houses/ flats are built to keep the heat in 😭😭😭 no AC anywhere