Hello Fran! I would really like you to know that you were responsible for me becoming an illustrator at the age of 40. I was 37 when I started watching your videos and I never stopped following you. I ended up quitting my job and now at 44, I'm 100% freelance.. so I guess it's really never too late. Let me tell you that we love you and even though I don't know you personally, it's like you're part of my family. My 11-year-old daughter is also a fan and please never forget your value and what you bring to the life of others❤ On a final note, I spent a lot of time working in NY in the past and despite being a fantastic city I never imagined myself liveling in it. It's emotionally draining and I never really felt at home, if you know what I mean.. I don't know, it's just a thought about the blues. A big kiss from your (possibly) oldest fan😊
I think there's this idea that if you experience depression it means you aren't happy with anything in your life or aren't grateful for what you have and that's sometimes just not the case. I also think if you have a history of depression already (or a family history), big life changes can trigger a depressive episode, almost like you're sad to let go of what was to make room for what is or what could be. Whatever the reason for your depression, Fran, talking about it and being open about it will always be a worthwhile conversation since it can help other people to not feel shame or embarrassment with their own mental health experiences 💛
Agreed. In addition to environmental/experiential/genetic factors, is biology. A chemical imbalance. Part of having a human body. It is effected by everything. Air/food quality, sunlight exposure, everything. So thank you for sharing Fran. Also, I’m so glad you have such a supportive therapist. ❤❤
What I’ve learned is that there are many different types of sadness like there are different types of love. And I think it’s wrong to class “being sad” as a bad feeling. I am at a point where I can accept my sadnesses and “accompany” them. Sometimes a sadness can struck me down and it’s hard to be get up again. I now accept that it is okay to keep laying on the ground for a while, I don’t have to get up right away.
Thanks for saying all of this. I came back to art after staying away for 30 years. I've been doing abstract art now full time since 2015 and I'm 63. Should have done it MUCH earlier, but still, better now than never. Thanks for all your inspiration.
I remember when I was going through a very extended bout of depression that I described it as constantly looking through a pane of glass. I was there and walking though life but I was never really participating. That glass was always there keeping me from reaching through and taking part. I’m sorry you’re going through it and feel so stuck! I’m glad you’re doing your best at accepting it. I think acceptance is the key (to a lot of things really). Just remember you won’t always feel like this. Nothing lasts forever. Some day you’ll be on the other side🙂💜 P.S.-I love the stationery “charcuterie” box! Way better than the usual spread in my opinion🙃
This was really refreshing to watch. I've been depressed for a long time, but it's gotten bad recently and it's been really hard to draw. I can't make art, it feels like a chore. I'm so young, only 23, and I feel like I'm not doing enough to work on my career. I want to rediscover myself so badly and start caring again. I've been looking up to you for a while, knowing that I'm not alone makes me feel much better. :'] Thank you Fran ❤ great vlog as always
Same age, same case for me :( I just got out of college and I'm feeling a lot of pressure to make art because I feel like time it's running out! But knowing that I'm not the only one it makes me feel better, we are all doing our best :')
Yes! Depression doesn't always match our circumstances. It's frustrating! The way I understand it, sometimes when things are going really well our mind might bring up more things that need to be processed from the past because we have time/energy/maturity to deal with it. Even if the timing is bad or doesn't make sense. Be gentle with yourself!
Depression comes in many different forms and severities, I completely get why you may feel reluctant to speak so openly on the internet, but please remember the majority of us understand and appreciate your words ❤
Ooooh Fran, te mando un fuerte abrazo! Entiendo perfectamente cuando hablabas de tener la motivación pero no la voluntad de hacer cosas. Yo estoy en mi semestre de graduación y es el momento de trabajar y esforzarme lo más que pueda para hacer un trabajo final del que me sienta orgullosa para graduarme. Tengo las ideas, la motivación, pero no los ánimos. También estoy pasando por una temporada de salud mental muy baja. Y mi vida es maravillosa también, trato de recordarme siempre lo agradecida que estoy, pero incluso eso lo siento forzado muchas veces. Cuando te escucho, en los videos y en los podcast newsletters, no escucho que te quejes o que seas mal agradecida, sino que escucho a alguien que refleja exactamente mis pensamientos y me siento más entendida, menos sola y hasta me siento consolada. Especialmente porque tú eres una persona que admiro muchísimo! y si escucho una versión de ti que es vulnerable y real, hace que la mirada que tenga conmigo misma sea mucho más amable. Muchas gracias por compartir
I feel you lovely soul ❤️ You are so brave to talk about your depression. The world needs more of you who can talk about it and make it more understandable and ”out in the open” as a part of ordinary life. I know how it feels, I myself have been depressed since teens (now 36 years old), you have better seasons and then you have those worse seasons (some of which can almost destroy you) but somehow you keep finding the strength to keep breathing, to keep waking up to another morning and building yourself up time after time. I think people need to hear and talk about these things more, so that they wouldn’t feel so alone with these things and could get some support from others who are dealing with same things. I’m still gathering the strength to do what you are already doing, keep up the good work, I’m proud of you, you got this! 🥰
I just turned 37, and I very nearly quit art literally like 2 days ago. I've been making art my whole life, but I had a whole crisis over why I make it, who I'm making it for, what's the point of it all, blah blah blah. I basically just said to myself, well, just keep making things because you want to, and try not to worry about the rest of it. I think people use Van Gogh as an example all the time because he is a really great example of all the things you talked about! I also struggle bad with depression, and it sucks A LOT. Your videos are some of my favorites, and I found this chat very helpful. Thanks Fran, take good care of yourself!
I hear you in taking away the judgement and living with the sadness. I sometimes describe depression as my "roomate", like your print! As someone with chronic depression too, I like to remind myself that although it sucks, the time that I spend depressed isn't less "worthy". Emotions aren't a hierarchy where happiness is the most valid and sadness is the least--we're human beings with very complicated inner emotional lives and living "sad" doesn't mean we're doing something wrong. It sucks that people see this chronic illness with the judgements that cultures place on emotions--when realistically our brains are just wired differently.
I lived in NYC (Upper West Side in Manhattan) for 40 years and 7 months (Spring 1981 to end of 2021). Even in the last months and weeks there, I would often look around my surroundings as I walked the streets and think, "I can't believe I live here!" I never became blase or jaded. I never lost my love for NYC. I would never have moved, but my wife, born and raised in Manhattan and Washington Heights (upper Manhattan), wanted to leave and live another kind of life. We're in a lovely area in South Carolina, but I will always love and miss NYC. The things I miss most are the easy access to the museums and its bookstores...and just walking its streets! The last time I was at the Guggenheim was nearly 5 years ago for a massive retrospective exhibit of the GREAT Alberto Giacometti.
It sucks so hard that so many ppl feel so much sadness and pain. I feel every word you say about feeling like I am too sad for the things in my life.. but that shouldn't matter. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, your creativity and your kind, amazing spirit. I loved this video again! Much love. 🐈⬛
Do not underestimate the power of grief. If you are grieving a person or a life you once had/thought you would have it can be difficult. You can be sad/grieving but also happy and grateful at the same time. Acceptance is great but it must also come with hope. Accept the current situation and that it might not ever change but have hope that it will. Keep working through it, you have so much support!
regarding the feeling that you're sadder than is warranted-- i find this is related to one's affect being off. often in depression there are two forms of misaligned affect: 1. having plenty of reasons to be sad but being unable to feel it out, and 2. even when not much is going on in the present moment, the feelings are overwhelming. the sadness you're feeling doesn't have to relate to modern times. in cases like this, your body and brain must be trying to process sadness you've gathered up during your life or things going on in the background. working on affect has helped me make sense of things when things simply don't make sense.
Fran es la primera vez que escribo un comentario y la verdad aunque no lo haga seguido amo ver tu esencia en cada vídeo. Aunque sea difícil vivir la depresión siento que aunque no lo parezca le pones mucha intención y valor a todo lo que haces aún con o difícil que debe ser para ti el sentir poca voluntad pero lo que reflejas es muchísimo más valioso de lo que piensas. Con tu contenido, tu pasión por lo que haces y la transparencia en lo que compartes a través de videos haces que muchos corazones se llenen, incluído el mío que valora mucho para segundo de plática que haces desde tu auténtica persona. Lo estás haciendo bien, y creo que el resultado de eso es la vida plena que te ganaste compartiendo todo aún en la adversidad. Un abrazo!! Espero tu próximo video! 💙
I always loved 'sitting with yourself' or 'sitting with your feelings'. You're not wallowing, you are allowing yourself to question why you are feeling the way you do. You are curious about it. You are allowing your self space to feel and be sad. Acceptance is very difficult especially with harder feelings. Thank you for honoring yourself and being honest , open and vulnerable. You are lovely, be super kind and gentle with youself. Sending love xx
Thanks for talking about this Fran, and sharing some of your day with us. You never fail to be genuinely you. I always look forward to your uploads, because even if there isn’t art i get to know Fran! It helps me feel more human about my own experiences with depression too. ❤
Thank you for talking so openly and so clearly about what depression is like for you - I feel like I can relate to most of what you said, and feel compassion, understanding and I also feel a little less lonely in what I'm going through, this enormous and crushing sadness, and that's comforting.
Fran, Thank you for sharing your truth with us! Your words resonate so much for me. It can be challenging for the mind when the source of the sadness is not tangible. It is beautiful to see you being gentle and patient with your body and mind. I hope this period of turbulance brings new beginnings and rest. It has been a privilege to see you blossom. Also In one of your most recent videos, you talked about how hard it is to find Spanish books in the city. Have you been to Mil Mundos? It's a small bilingual bookshop/community center in Bushwick.
After the worst phase of depression I've learned to be glad to feel sad or anxious, because those are at least feelings. In the darkest moments of depression I feel absolutely nothing. The happy feelings always take the longest to return after depression. It's such a weird thing when your own brain is against you telling you you're unworthy, or anything you do doesn't bring those dopamine kicks anymore. I've come to terms that this is a thing I have to live with and learn to cope for the rest of my life. And I try to live through the sadness being thankful that at least I'm feeling a genuine feeling, and usually after that the happy feelings start to make a slow comeback too. Many times after the worst of depression I still have just ghost-feelings, when I remember that this thing used to make me happy, but the actual happiness doesn't come. Much strength and hope for everyone who is battling with the same issues 💕
Girl. 💜 You are seen. You are heard. Depression is the worst. I love how you distinguished between the motivation to do something and the will to do something. I felt that so hard! I was like, "UGH YES I Know how that feels!!!"
Wow...Fran... I was sending you this message to let you know how much I truly enjoy your videos and watching you draw. But then I read Catia's message and realized how deeply your talent is impacting others, not just me. I hope knowing this brings you a large measure of joy! 🐈❤️
I am crying because you just literally described exactly what I am experiencing. I love my life but I am so sad. Just know that you are a huge inspiration to me as an artist and a human. Much love! Hope we will soon be back in our studios and creating.
Love the museum visit ❤ Have ever you thought of seeing a nutritionist? I had manic depression in my in 20s, I think Was lacking some essential nutrients. Also exercise helped me too, I know motivation is hard, but I would just tell my myself I going for a 5 min walk that’s all ( but it was always longer) You have a beautiful soul and your art is wonderful, I hope you find a way out of the sadness to enjoy your life more ❤
I relate so much to what you said about the mental health talk. Genetically I'm predisposed to it too, and even when my life is at its "best", my head can still be at its worst. It's really confusing! And definitely a bit tricky to talk about but I think you did a superb job explaining (especially for people who don't fully understand depression!).
Hi. I discovered your channel about half a year ago and since then I've been looking forward to every new video. Just want to say how much I admire you and think that you're just this wonderful person who is going through life, accepting all the ups and downs, making beautiful art and generally being brave. And I want to say thank you for all your videos, you are an inspiration! I hope that you'll feel better soon :)
Sending love and light, beloved. I’m a poet and artist - I hear you. Despite your sadness, you are still creating. Despite the challenges, you choose a color like red … I see it in your art, in your clothing … it’s as if there is a heartbeat, a pulse that continues to show up. As hope, as strength, as love. ❤
oooh fran;;;;;; este video es mi lugar seguro ahora mismo, siempre que hablo de mi depresión con mi círculo de apoyo lo hago desde una forzada esperanza dando a entender que ya no estaré más en ese estado, pero con este video me sentí comprendida y acompañada. No sabía poner en palabras la diferencia entre tener la motivación pero no la voluntad, y entiendo perfectamente que podemos ser duros con nosotros mismos juzgando el por qué estamos deprimidos cuando estamos pasando por cosas buenas, es horrible pero pasa u u nuevamente gracias fran, significas muchísimo para mí ❤❤
Stay safe Fran, get out in nature as much as you feel you can, and always remember to pencil yourself in your own diary (ie be extra aware of your own needs) I hope you enjoy your new course, and that each day, will bring you something to smile about 😊
For someone who has dealt with depression and anxiety- mostly anxiety - almost all my life, I found that the best way I managed is to imagine my life in a huge infinite space where everything coexist (happiness, sadness, anxiety, etc), and that everything is allowed to exist at the same time, the key is to know where I want to focus my energy into. I tell my anxiety to stay in the background while I go to work and that’s okay because we can all coexist in peace.
Theres a lil flutter of happiness each time I ever hear you say "its ok baby". it just showcases your sweetness in such a simplistic way. Ive learned that anxiety and depression dont need a reason to be prevalent in our lives. The more ive tried to understand why ive been feeling or reacting to a certain way the more i seem to disassociate with myself, and lengthen the time im depressed/anxious. Just be gentle with yourself. Ride out the wave, and trust in yourself that even though it might come back, it wont last forever. I hope you feel better soon.
Van Gough is a wonderful example. What we should do and what we do are so different……I think living naturally is most i,portent, this keeps us authentic and honest and true to ourselves….
I love your video and the way you talk. When you say you just want to spend all day working but don't have the will to do it I just related so much, I'm suffered a lot from the same thing recently and I thought that is because I'm too lazy and too afraid of failure, I didn't connect that with my depression. And I'm glad (and kinda envy) you can talk about your depression with us, I am a taiwanese and it's kinda awkward to talk about depression here, lots of people will think we just emo and craving for attention🥲Anyway I really love you and you're almost the most heartwarming person I ever seen💖
I feel the same way. Winter cold and lack of sunlight does not help. But Spring is here so hopefully it'll feel better. At least we NYC is always outside our door waiting for us.
Your words mean so much to me, you're describing exactly how I feel, especially the part on wanting things but not having the willpower to do them, that's literally me every day and it's so so hard
Oh, i feel you, Fran, & also all you dear Fran fans sharing this experience. Darkness, my old friend, has been around for me for quite many years, (from my 20s to my mid-thirties now). Recently I had an epiphany that I also have Adhd as well, which explains oh so much, but really fucks with my executive function and thus being able to do the things I wanna do. But I keep on fighting and doing as best as I can. Recently I've become much better with my depression, since I've decided to let go of my agony with having to study at University and doing the 1 thing I love instead: being a dancer & dance teacher & bringing joy, creativity and sillyness to the world. It's all still in progress, but I hope we will all get better soon and find our balance and joy & while being sourrounded by our loved ones. I send all of us lots of strength, love and compassion on our ways ❤! We got this!
Yep, depression sucks. I appreciate you being honest about where you're at. I too am struggling more these days. It is frustrating. You are not alone, my friend. Big hugs XO
You're the best, Fran. The willingness/motivation bit? I felt that 100%. I've been there before, and I'll likely be there again. I appreciate you sharing that.
Hola fran !! Queria decirte lo importante que es tu canal para mi. Cada vez que veo tus videos me siento abrazada, acompañada, es una de las sensaciones mas calidas que he sentido, estoy tan orgullosa de tí como un extraño puede estarlo por otro, gracias por hablar, por darme compañía, tengo años viendote y es maravilloso ver como hablas de tu realidad, de tu vida, me ayudas a crecer y mejorar, a pensar y avanzar, gracias 💗💗💗 un abrazo desde Campeche, México 🫂
Beautiful Fran. Thank you for sharing this... I also suffer from depression and anxiety despite my wonderful life. Mindful Self Compassion is working for me but I still have difficult days and weeks. Sending you love, and the blessing "May you live with ease". ❤
Hi, Fran! This vlog is so calm and comforting, thank you for sharing your thoughts and talking with us about your depression, I feel lucky to be one of those people that watch your videos. You're genuine and kind! Thank you for always! :) Love from Brazil! 💛
Thank you for this video Fran! I just graduated from music school and I’ve also found myself really depressed recently, and it helps me so much to hear that I’m not alone in going through this. Sending you love! ❤
I am so greatful you shared this with us. I was really struck by the diference between motivation and the will to do something. For me it was the opposite for the longest time. I was working on pure will but had no motivation. And now my will run dry as well. Depression is a b*tch! But we can beat her!
Depression is a hard thing to explain unless you have been/are going through it! In my experience, it is quite complex and comes with many symptoms besides sadness. Thank you so much for sharing and for taking us along to the art museum, and around NYC. I always enjoy watching your vlogs. ❤
I echo everything, and I mean *EVERYTHING*, you’ve said about your experience with depression. I When you said “I’m here, baby, and I got you”, I really felt that. I got you too Fran!!!
You’re a beautiful person Fran and you deserve all the good things in your life and we know that you are grateful for them. But you feel what you feel and are working hard to understand the reasons. Wishing you more peace and much happiness.
Fran, I can so relate. In my case, there is no studio but it is the same room I am living in and yet I cannot get myself to do the work sometimes, get up and to the corner where the table is, while it is not even far away... lately it is more often than sometimes. I think I envy you living in NY, with all the art exhibits around you, but I also get why you might be depressed, I really get it. I learned that for example art block can occur when there is a negative thinking and sorrows or worries. Thank you for being so open with us, it did help to some extend. I am sure you can overcome this depression/sadness, you can do it. 🙃🙂
Your kitty is so beautiful and soft looking! I adore the way you tell stories and weave your everyday moments into a magical montage of a life. Thank you, Fran. Whenever you show up is enough.
Hey Fran, appreciate your videos even when you are going through a rough time. It is hard to know what is triggering our feelings but taking a step back really helps. I hope you find your answers.
I've joined the course thanks to you! You've inspired me so much since I started learning to draw 2 years ago and now you've inspired me to take my first steps in learning art history and theory- thank you so much Fran, you and your content is always motivating me to keep going 🥰🥰
What a beautiful way to see, feel and handle depression. I hope you find that peace you need to return to your "normal" state, I send you a hug sweetie. Thanks for sharing this video.❤
After watching such environment, art and creativity, I too would have thought that weather I live there or not. You are lucky but more than that you also have done a lot of hard work for it. Enjoy it dear fran. I wish I could too watch such wonders some day. Thank you for making such beautiful vlogs. I love the art museum and Alex Katz work. He seems like a dreamer.
You are such a beautiful human, Fran! I love your channel, I've been watching your videos for many years now. I can relate to most of your words. You deserve the best, dear! A big hug from Italy!
Todo va a estar bien ❤ te entiendo a la perfección. Esta claramente no es la solución, pero siempre ayuda tomar once con tu gente cercana y comer sopaipillas con mermelada, a veces la vida se vuelve tan caótica, pero cuando como mi sopaipilla con mermelada siento que la vida es más simple de lo que mi mente me hace creer. Saludos desde Chile
Oh, Fran... this video was lovely! Thank you so much for sharing your experiences and feelings. I am currently going through a career transition. I feel so scared, depressed and anxious. At the same time, I have support from my family and friends, a nice house, nice things, and just like you, I don't know where this sadness comes from. Thanks for sharing, I don't feel so alone. Know that you are not alone either. We are all wishing you the best! You are special and loved.
Thank you for sharing with us Fran. You are wonderful and we love you. Glad you're taking good care of yourself. Sending you all the love and healing vibes xxx
Te entiendo completamente, estoy pasando por lo mismo solo que ahora sé cuáles son los pensamientos que detonan la ansiedad junto con los síntomas que físicamente me afectan terriblemente. Ya es un avance descubrir como ciertas emociones nos activan esto. Intenta estar en el presente y atenta a cuando llega ese cambio de emoción para saber que pensamiento es el que motiva la ansiedad y por ende el resto de cosas. Un abrazo, saludos desde Barcelona ✊🔥
Te mando un fuerte abrazo, haces bien hablando de esto. Al mismo tiempo que puedes ayudar a mucha gente a no sentirse sola, también verbalizarlo resulta terapeútico para uno mismo. Me siento muy identificada con lo que cuentas, hace años sentía que lo tenía todo para ser feliz y no entendía de dónde venía esa tristeza tan exagerada. Creo que solemos buscar el problema fuera de nosotros (qué está mal en mi vida?) cuando muchas veces está solo dentro y es cuestión de identificarlo (traumas, asociaciones negativas, sentimientos reprimidos etc). Ojalá puedas mejorar 💛 y vuelva la energía para hacer lo que amas. Es frustrante sentir que quieres y no puedes.
Hola Fran, te veo desde que estabas en Alemania (creo que es la primera vez que escribo). Siempre has sido una inspiración para mí. Yo también estoy con depresión desde hace ya un tiempo y verte me da fuerzas. Espero que todo mejore pronto :)
Thank you for the discovery of Alex Katz art and for sharing your feelings & mental situation here. I understand very much and recognize myself in what you share so I don't feel alone in not knowing where it comes from and why it feels not aligned with my life context.
i felt so incredibly fond and appreciative of you while watching this video ❤ i’ve been following you since you were in hastings back in the day and you somehow feel like an old friend. i go through the same mental health stuff and have always appreciated your willingness to be open and honest about the difficult sides of life. i wish you so much peace and joy and graphic novel publishing deals!! thank you for being here ❤❤
Fran give yourself some grace! You don't have to justify how you feel, or why you feel that way; you just feel. And that's ok. Well done for sitting down with it and allowing yourself to experience it rather than trying to push it away. It makes me think of that 'Going on a Bear Hunt' Book - "we can't go over it, we can't go under it, we've got to go through it."
Hola Fran! espero que estés muy bien Me gustaría agradecerte por abrirte de esa manera respecto a tu salud y a la vida en general, me parece muy valiente y valioso ese gesto. Me has ayudado un montón con tu visión sobre la salud mental. Acá va la parte intensa ja: Estuve muchos años con problemas de salud mental que se volvieron muy graves, tuve casos de mala praxis, intentos de suicidio, brotes e internaciones en clínicas psiquiátricas. Durante esos procesos, en mis momentos de lucidez, me refugie en el arte, me guió muchísimo para comprender qué sentía en realidad y qué tenia en mi cabeza durante ese tiempo. Ahora una vez recuperado estoy ante la decisión de estudiar ciencias de la cultura y arte, me da mucho miedo ya que está muy conectado a mi estabilidad. Pero al ver la vida del otro y los procesos que debemos pasar, me hace sentir que no soy el único, que no estoy perdido y que pertenezco a un mundo que me está esperando tarde o temprano. Tengo 26 años y la verdad es que me alegra mucho haber descubierto a personas como vos, me sos de mucha inspiración. Ya hasta te he agarrado cariño... En fin te quiero agradecer ya que con abrir tu vida también rescatas la vida de los demás. Espero que sigas en tu camino y te mando fuerzas. Saludos desde Argentina
You have the magic that I can’t stop smiling when I saw your face ❤ I’m so glad that you enjoy the life so much there and share all the beautiful moments with us ! Te quiero mucho !
Sounds like you are holding a lot of guilt for feeling down, but it is a natural feeling and it happens (especially with family history). Let that guilt be gone, because you definitely aren't at fault for the way you are feeling.
Thank you for sharing your feelings on your depression. I live with anxiety and it can be crippling and make me house-bound. I also understand when you say you love your life. That is me too. I love this quote from author Agatha Christie who said ""I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing." ..
thank you so much for sharing your genuine thoughts and feelings 💜 after years and years of battling depression, I'm at a point of seeing it as a part of me. I feel like it could sound scary to someone else, but after so many years of trying to get rid of it, changing the mindset around it from battling it to learning to live with it truly helps so much. thank you for a great video, as always 💜
Fran, thank you so much for sharing about your mental health! 🙏🏼 i’ve had anxiety since i was about 10, and later on i’ve been diagnosed with bipolar. so i relate to you saying that you don’t know why you’re feeling sad and down and depressed. i often go through this “not knowing whyyy” too! just wanted to give you a bit of a shoutout 💜 thank you for your vlogs, i love them so much! 🤍 sending you hugs! 💜💜💜
oh man, I feel what you say about being depressed and not knowing why. For me personally it turned out that I was and am an autist with adhd the whole time. Now that I know I can handle bad times way better. I hope you feel better soon, too!
Thank you for sharing these insights about depression, I can totally relate and somehow I feel less alone now ❤ I’m going through an extended period of grief right now - I’m going to embrace the sadness too ❤
(Could it be from drinking too much coffee? Maybe the adrenals need a rest?) Sometimes depression is just about mourning what you lost. Getting to where you want to be can sometimes give you the space to let it all out. Maybe you finally feel safe to be sad without needing a reason. I think it's a good sign, just keep welcoming the feelings and tell them, "It's OK, you can be with me. " It's so brave to talk about mental health, so I commend you, Fran!
You’ve been through a lot over the past few years, Fran. You don’t have to justify your feelings. You’re discovering who you really are and that’s a huge thing. Take care 💕🌈⚡️
For me is quite funny when you say that you're feeling sad all the time. I used to share the same thing a lot in therapy and what helped me a lot was remembering that when I was depressed I wasn't feeling anything at all. I know that is quite unintuitive to think this, but I keep seeing it as an improvement. When I was a kid I was definitely not allowed to feel these negative things so now that I'm alloying myself I learned how to adjust what is actual sadness and what is frustration/anger/tiredness. I made some changes in my life when I was 'getting better' and now I change it back XD I'm back to the city that I genuinely thought was not was not ideal for me. But now I see that part of my sadness was that I was not achieving the expectations of my idealized happiness, and in the end, it was just my childish idea of happiness. im just sharing that so you don't feel alone in this situation. we are always adapting for the expectations that we have for ourselves.
I don't know if this helps at all Fran, but it can be a relief to stop asking 'why do I feel this?' thinking we are choosing something, and remind ourselves that mental illness is a physical thing happening in the body. Our brain activity literally changes during depression, and in turn affects the rest of our body. I know that answer doesn't give you any helpful 'solution' but sometimes it is helpful to think of our mental illness like a broken leg or any other physical pain. Of course this doesn't mean we can't reach out for help or work towards better coping skills, but it is super grounding to have a reason why.
Hello Fran! I would really like you to know that you were responsible for me becoming an illustrator at the age of 40. I was 37 when I started watching your videos and I never stopped following you. I ended up quitting my job and now at 44, I'm 100% freelance.. so I guess it's really never too late. Let me tell you that we love you and even though I don't know you personally, it's like you're part of my family. My 11-year-old daughter is also a fan and please never forget your value and what you bring to the life of others❤ On a final note, I spent a lot of time working in NY in the past and despite being a fantastic city I never imagined myself liveling in it. It's emotionally draining and I never really felt at home, if you know what I mean.. I don't know, it's just a thought about the blues. A big kiss from your (possibly) oldest fan😊
May I applaud you on your pursuit of a art career at 40
@@lawsdraws Thank you so much Laura! It's not easy indeed🫶
🎉❤ That’s amazing!
So amazing 👏🏽!
Wooow this is so wonderful and the fact that alsoyour daughterlikes Fran almost makes me cry. This is beautiful.
I think there's this idea that if you experience depression it means you aren't happy with anything in your life or aren't grateful for what you have and that's sometimes just not the case. I also think if you have a history of depression already (or a family history), big life changes can trigger a depressive episode, almost like you're sad to let go of what was to make room for what is or what could be. Whatever the reason for your depression, Fran, talking about it and being open about it will always be a worthwhile conversation since it can help other people to not feel shame or embarrassment with their own mental health experiences 💛
This is so beautifully worded ❤
Agreed. In addition to environmental/experiential/genetic factors, is biology. A chemical imbalance. Part of having a human body. It is effected by everything. Air/food quality, sunlight exposure, everything. So thank you for sharing Fran. Also, I’m so glad you have such a supportive therapist. ❤❤
What I’ve learned is that there are many different types of sadness like there are different types of love. And I think it’s wrong to class “being sad” as a bad feeling. I am at a point where I can accept my sadnesses and “accompany” them. Sometimes a sadness can struck me down and it’s hard to be get up again. I now accept that it is okay to keep laying on the ground for a while, I don’t have to get up right away.
well said!
Thanks for saying all of this. I came back to art after staying away for 30 years. I've been doing abstract art now full time since 2015 and I'm 63. Should have done it MUCH earlier, but still, better now than never. Thanks for all your inspiration.
I remember when I was going through a very extended bout of depression that I described it as constantly looking through a pane of glass. I was there and walking though life but I was never really participating. That glass was always there keeping me from reaching through and taking part. I’m sorry you’re going through it and feel so stuck! I’m glad you’re doing your best at accepting it. I think acceptance is the key (to a lot of things really). Just remember you won’t always feel like this. Nothing lasts forever. Some day you’ll be on the other side🙂💜
P.S.-I love the stationery “charcuterie” box! Way better than the usual spread in my opinion🙃
The part about seeing life through a pane of glass sounds like dissociation. If you search dissociation and glass you'll see it come up.
This was really refreshing to watch. I've been depressed for a long time, but it's gotten bad recently and it's been really hard to draw. I can't make art, it feels like a chore. I'm so young, only 23, and I feel like I'm not doing enough to work on my career. I want to rediscover myself so badly and start caring again. I've been looking up to you for a while, knowing that I'm not alone makes me feel much better. :'] Thank you Fran ❤ great vlog as always
Same age, same case for me :( I just got out of college and I'm feeling a lot of pressure to make art because I feel like time it's running out! But knowing that I'm not the only one it makes me feel better, we are all doing our best :')
Yes! Depression doesn't always match our circumstances. It's frustrating! The way I understand it, sometimes when things are going really well our mind might bring up more things that need to be processed from the past because we have time/energy/maturity to deal with it. Even if the timing is bad or doesn't make sense. Be gentle with yourself!
Depression comes in many different forms and severities, I completely get why you may feel reluctant to speak so openly on the internet, but please remember the majority of us understand and appreciate your words ❤
Ooooh Fran, te mando un fuerte abrazo! Entiendo perfectamente cuando hablabas de tener la motivación pero no la voluntad de hacer cosas. Yo estoy en mi semestre de graduación y es el momento de trabajar y esforzarme lo más que pueda para hacer un trabajo final del que me sienta orgullosa para graduarme. Tengo las ideas, la motivación, pero no los ánimos. También estoy pasando por una temporada de salud mental muy baja. Y mi vida es maravillosa también, trato de recordarme siempre lo agradecida que estoy, pero incluso eso lo siento forzado muchas veces. Cuando te escucho, en los videos y en los podcast newsletters, no escucho que te quejes o que seas mal agradecida, sino que escucho a alguien que refleja exactamente mis pensamientos y me siento más entendida, menos sola y hasta me siento consolada. Especialmente porque tú eres una persona que admiro muchísimo! y si escucho una versión de ti que es vulnerable y real, hace que la mirada que tenga conmigo misma sea mucho más amable. Muchas gracias por compartir
I feel you lovely soul ❤️ You are so brave to talk about your depression. The world needs more of you who can talk about it and make it more understandable and ”out in the open” as a part of ordinary life.
I know how it feels, I myself have been depressed since teens (now 36 years old), you have better seasons and then you have those worse seasons (some of which can almost destroy you) but somehow you keep finding the strength to keep breathing, to keep waking up to another morning and building yourself up time after time.
I think people need to hear and talk about these things more, so that they wouldn’t feel so alone with these things and could get some support from others who are dealing with same things.
I’m still gathering the strength to do what you are already doing, keep up the good work, I’m proud of you, you got this! 🥰
I just turned 37, and I very nearly quit art literally like 2 days ago. I've been making art my whole life, but I had a whole crisis over why I make it, who I'm making it for, what's the point of it all, blah blah blah. I basically just said to myself, well, just keep making things because you want to, and try not to worry about the rest of it. I think people use Van Gogh as an example all the time because he is a really great example of all the things you talked about! I also struggle bad with depression, and it sucks A LOT. Your videos are some of my favorites, and I found this chat very helpful. Thanks Fran, take good care of yourself!
I hear you in taking away the judgement and living with the sadness. I sometimes describe depression as my "roomate", like your print! As someone with chronic depression too, I like to remind myself that although it sucks, the time that I spend depressed isn't less "worthy". Emotions aren't a hierarchy where happiness is the most valid and sadness is the least--we're human beings with very complicated inner emotional lives and living "sad" doesn't mean we're doing something wrong. It sucks that people see this chronic illness with the judgements that cultures place on emotions--when realistically our brains are just wired differently.
I lived in NYC (Upper West Side in Manhattan) for 40 years and 7 months (Spring 1981 to end of 2021). Even in the last months and weeks there, I would often look around my surroundings as I walked the streets and think, "I can't believe I live here!" I never became blase or jaded. I never lost my love for NYC. I would never have moved, but my wife, born and raised in Manhattan and Washington Heights (upper Manhattan), wanted to leave and live another kind of life. We're in a lovely area in South Carolina, but I will always love and miss NYC. The things I miss most are the easy access to the museums and its bookstores...and just walking its streets! The last time I was at the Guggenheim was nearly 5 years ago for a massive retrospective exhibit of the GREAT Alberto Giacometti.
It sucks so hard that so many ppl feel so much sadness and pain. I feel every word you say about feeling like I am too sad for the things in my life.. but that shouldn't matter. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, your creativity and your kind, amazing spirit. I loved this video again! Much love. 🐈⬛
Do not underestimate the power of grief. If you are grieving a person or a life you once had/thought you would have it can be difficult. You can be sad/grieving but also happy and grateful at the same time. Acceptance is great but it must also come with hope. Accept the current situation and that it might not ever change but have hope that it will. Keep working through it, you have so much support!
fran, your videos remind me that solitary is such a beautiful thing :,) and u make me feel not-alone somehow. thank u for ur work
regarding the feeling that you're sadder than is warranted-- i find this is related to one's affect being off. often in depression there are two forms of misaligned affect: 1. having plenty of reasons to be sad but being unable to feel it out, and 2. even when not much is going on in the present moment, the feelings are overwhelming. the sadness you're feeling doesn't have to relate to modern times. in cases like this, your body and brain must be trying to process sadness you've gathered up during your life or things going on in the background. working on affect has helped me make sense of things when things simply don't make sense.
Fran es la primera vez que escribo un comentario y la verdad aunque no lo haga seguido amo ver tu esencia en cada vídeo. Aunque sea difícil vivir la depresión siento que aunque no lo parezca le pones mucha intención y valor a todo lo que haces aún con o difícil que debe ser para ti el sentir poca voluntad pero lo que reflejas es muchísimo más valioso de lo que piensas. Con tu contenido, tu pasión por lo que haces y la transparencia en lo que compartes a través de videos haces que muchos corazones se llenen, incluído el mío que valora mucho para segundo de plática que haces desde tu auténtica persona. Lo estás haciendo bien, y creo que el resultado de eso es la vida plena que te ganaste compartiendo todo aún en la adversidad. Un abrazo!! Espero tu próximo video! 💙
I always loved 'sitting with yourself' or 'sitting with your feelings'. You're not wallowing, you are allowing yourself to question why you are feeling the way you do. You are curious about it. You are allowing your self space to feel and be sad. Acceptance is very difficult especially with harder feelings. Thank you for honoring yourself and being honest , open and vulnerable. You are lovely, be super kind and gentle with youself. Sending love xx
Thanks for talking about this Fran, and sharing some of your day with us.
You never fail to be genuinely you. I always look forward to your uploads, because even if there isn’t art i get to know Fran!
It helps me feel more human about my own experiences with depression too. ❤
Thank you for talking so openly and so clearly about what depression is like for you - I feel like I can relate to most of what you said, and feel compassion, understanding and I also feel a little less lonely in what I'm going through, this enormous and crushing sadness, and that's comforting.
Fran, Thank you for sharing your truth with us! Your words resonate so much for me. It can be challenging for the mind when the source of the sadness is not tangible. It is beautiful to see you being gentle and patient with your body and mind. I hope this period of turbulance brings new beginnings and rest. It has been a privilege to see you blossom.
Also In one of your most recent videos, you talked about how hard it is to find Spanish books in the city. Have you been to Mil Mundos? It's a small bilingual bookshop/community center in Bushwick.
After the worst phase of depression I've learned to be glad to feel sad or anxious, because those are at least feelings. In the darkest moments of depression I feel absolutely nothing. The happy feelings always take the longest to return after depression. It's such a weird thing when your own brain is against you telling you you're unworthy, or anything you do doesn't bring those dopamine kicks anymore. I've come to terms that this is a thing I have to live with and learn to cope for the rest of my life. And I try to live through the sadness being thankful that at least I'm feeling a genuine feeling, and usually after that the happy feelings start to make a slow comeback too. Many times after the worst of depression I still have just ghost-feelings, when I remember that this thing used to make me happy, but the actual happiness doesn't come. Much strength and hope for everyone who is battling with the same issues 💕
Girl. 💜 You are seen. You are heard. Depression is the worst. I love how you distinguished between the motivation to do something and the will to do something. I felt that so hard! I was like, "UGH YES I Know how that feels!!!"
Wow...Fran...
I was sending you this message to let you know how much I truly enjoy your videos and watching you draw. But then I read Catia's message and realized how deeply your talent is impacting others, not just me. I hope knowing this brings you a large measure of joy! 🐈❤️
I am crying because you just literally described exactly what I am experiencing. I love my life but I am so sad. Just know that you are a huge inspiration to me as an artist and a human. Much love! Hope we will soon be back in our studios and creating.
The clock transition at 23:19 was just excellent at the end!
Love the museum visit ❤ Have ever you thought of seeing a nutritionist? I had manic depression in my in 20s, I think Was lacking some essential nutrients. Also exercise helped me too, I know motivation is hard, but I would just tell my myself I going for a 5 min walk that’s all ( but it was always longer) You have a beautiful soul and your art is wonderful, I hope you find a way out of the sadness to enjoy your life more ❤
I relate so much to what you said about the mental health talk. Genetically I'm predisposed to it too, and even when my life is at its "best", my head can still be at its worst. It's really confusing! And definitely a bit tricky to talk about but I think you did a superb job explaining (especially for people who don't fully understand depression!).
Hi. I discovered your channel about half a year ago and since then I've been looking forward to every new video. Just want to say how much I admire you and think that you're just this wonderful person who is going through life, accepting all the ups and downs, making beautiful art and generally being brave. And I want to say thank you for all your videos, you are an inspiration! I hope that you'll feel better soon :)
Sending love and light, beloved. I’m a poet and artist - I hear you. Despite your sadness, you are still creating. Despite the challenges, you choose a color like red … I see it in your art, in your clothing … it’s as if there is a heartbeat, a pulse that continues to show up. As hope, as strength, as love. ❤
oooh fran;;;;;; este video es mi lugar seguro ahora mismo, siempre que hablo de mi depresión con mi círculo de apoyo lo hago desde una forzada esperanza dando a entender que ya no estaré más en ese estado, pero con este video me sentí comprendida y acompañada. No sabía poner en palabras la diferencia entre tener la motivación pero no la voluntad, y entiendo perfectamente que podemos ser duros con nosotros mismos juzgando el por qué estamos deprimidos cuando estamos pasando por cosas buenas, es horrible pero pasa u u
nuevamente gracias fran, significas muchísimo para mí ❤❤
Stay safe Fran, get out in nature as much as you feel you can, and always remember to pencil yourself in your own diary (ie be extra aware of your own needs)
I hope you enjoy your new course, and that each day, will bring you something to smile about 😊
For someone who has dealt with depression and anxiety- mostly anxiety - almost all my life, I found that the best way I managed is to imagine my life in a huge infinite space where everything coexist (happiness, sadness, anxiety, etc), and that everything is allowed to exist at the same time, the key is to know where I want to focus my energy into. I tell my anxiety to stay in the background while I go to work and that’s okay because we can all coexist in peace.
Theres a lil flutter of happiness each time I ever hear you say "its ok baby". it just showcases your sweetness in such a simplistic way.
Ive learned that anxiety and depression dont need a reason to be prevalent in our lives. The more ive tried to understand why ive been feeling or reacting to a certain way the more i seem to disassociate with myself, and lengthen the time im depressed/anxious. Just be gentle with yourself. Ride out the wave, and trust in yourself that even though it might come back, it wont last forever.
I hope you feel better soon.
I got recommended a video from you 3 hours ago and I've been binging your whole channel ever since. your energy is priceless I swear💕✨
Van Gough is a wonderful example. What we should do and what we do are so different……I think living naturally is most i,portent, this keeps us authentic and honest and true to ourselves….
I love your video and the way you talk. When you say you just want to spend all day working but don't have the will to do it I just related so much, I'm suffered a lot from the same thing recently and I thought that is because I'm too lazy and too afraid of failure, I didn't connect that with my depression. And I'm glad (and kinda envy) you can talk about your depression with us, I am a taiwanese and it's kinda awkward to talk about depression here, lots of people will think we just emo and craving for attention🥲Anyway I really love you and you're almost the most heartwarming person I ever seen💖
One of my life ambitions is to go to the Guggenheim. I'm in the UK. Thank you for taking me.❤
I feel the same way. Winter cold and lack of sunlight does not help. But Spring is here so hopefully it'll feel better. At least we NYC is always outside our door waiting for us.
Your words mean so much to me, you're describing exactly how I feel, especially the part on wanting things but not having the willpower to do them, that's literally me every day and it's so so hard
Oh, i feel you, Fran, & also all you dear Fran fans sharing this experience.
Darkness, my old friend, has been around for me for quite many years, (from my 20s to my mid-thirties now). Recently I had an epiphany that I also have Adhd as well, which explains oh so much, but really fucks with my executive function and thus being able to do the things I wanna do. But I keep on fighting and doing as best as I can.
Recently I've become much better with my depression, since I've decided to let go of my agony with having to study at University and doing the 1 thing I love instead: being a dancer & dance teacher & bringing joy, creativity and sillyness to the world. It's all still in progress, but I hope we will all get better soon and find our balance and joy & while being sourrounded by our loved ones.
I send all of us lots of strength, love and compassion on our ways ❤!
We got this!
Ay, Fran. Me has hecho llorar muchísimo con este vídeo. Me haces sentir comprendida.
Te mando un abrazo!
Yep, depression sucks. I appreciate you being honest about where you're at. I too am struggling more these days. It is frustrating. You are not alone, my friend. Big hugs XO
Thank you for sharing your visit to the Guggenheim and the Alex Katz exhibit. I am sad that I missed his show, he's one of my favorite artists.🎨
You're the best, Fran. The willingness/motivation bit? I felt that 100%. I've been there before, and I'll likely be there again. I appreciate you sharing that.
Rocko's modern life!!! 😄
Hola fran !!
Queria decirte lo importante que es tu canal para mi.
Cada vez que veo tus videos me siento abrazada, acompañada, es una de las sensaciones mas calidas que he sentido, estoy tan orgullosa de tí como un extraño puede estarlo por otro, gracias por hablar, por darme compañía, tengo años viendote y es maravilloso ver como hablas de tu realidad, de tu vida, me ayudas a crecer y mejorar, a pensar y avanzar, gracias 💗💗💗
un abrazo desde Campeche, México 🫂
Fran, your videos always feel like a warm mug of coffee and a hug from a friend. Thank you!
Beautiful Fran. Thank you for sharing this... I also suffer from depression and anxiety despite my wonderful life. Mindful Self Compassion is working for me but I still have difficult days and weeks. Sending you love, and the blessing "May you live with ease". ❤
Hi, Fran! This vlog is so calm and comforting, thank you for sharing your thoughts and talking with us about your depression, I feel lucky to be one of those people that watch your videos. You're genuine and kind! Thank you for always! :) Love from Brazil!
💛
Thank you for this video Fran! I just graduated from music school and I’ve also found myself really depressed recently, and it helps me so much to hear that I’m not alone in going through this. Sending you love! ❤
I am so greatful you shared this with us. I was really struck by the diference between motivation and the will to do something. For me it was the opposite for the longest time. I was working on pure will but had no motivation. And now my will run dry as well.
Depression is a b*tch! But we can beat her!
Depression is a hard thing to explain unless you have been/are going through it! In my experience, it is quite complex and comes with many symptoms besides sadness. Thank you so much for sharing and for taking us along to the art museum, and around NYC. I always enjoy watching your vlogs. ❤
I echo everything, and I mean *EVERYTHING*, you’ve said about your experience with depression. I When you said “I’m here, baby, and I got you”, I really felt that. I got you too Fran!!!
You’re a beautiful person Fran and you deserve all the good things in your life and we know that you are grateful for them. But you feel what you feel and are working hard to understand the reasons. Wishing you more peace and much happiness.
Fran, I can so relate. In my case, there is no studio but it is the same room I am living in and yet I cannot get myself to do the work sometimes, get up and to the corner where the table is, while it is not even far away... lately it is more often than sometimes. I think I envy you living in NY, with all the art exhibits around you, but I also get why you might be depressed, I really get it. I learned that for example art block can occur when there is a negative thinking and sorrows or worries. Thank you for being so open with us, it did help to some extend. I am sure you can overcome this depression/sadness, you can do it. 🙃🙂
Your kitty is so beautiful and soft looking! I adore the way you tell stories and weave your everyday moments into a magical montage of a life. Thank you, Fran. Whenever you show up is enough.
Hey Fran, appreciate your videos even when you are going through a rough time. It is hard to know what is triggering our feelings but taking a step back really helps. I hope you find your answers.
Depression can go kick rocks. Lol I completely understand what your saying. I give myself grace all the time.
I've joined the course thanks to you! You've inspired me so much since I started learning to draw 2 years ago and now you've inspired me to take my first steps in learning art history and theory- thank you so much Fran, you and your content is always motivating me to keep going 🥰🥰
Thank you lovely Fran
What a beautiful way to see, feel and handle depression. I hope you find that peace you need to return to your "normal" state, I send you a hug sweetie. Thanks for sharing this video.❤
Stoked you shared this museum trip. Quite refreshing. Thank you.
thank you! I'm going through a depressive episode right now and I find solace in your videos
After watching such environment, art and creativity, I too would have thought that weather I live there or not. You are lucky but more than that you also have done a lot of hard work for it. Enjoy it dear fran. I wish I could too watch such wonders some day. Thank you for making such beautiful vlogs. I love the art museum and Alex Katz work. He seems like a dreamer.
You are such a beautiful human, Fran! I love your channel, I've been watching your videos for many years now. I can relate to most of your words. You deserve the best, dear! A big hug from Italy!
Watching your videos makes me calm and inspired.Thank you, Fran!
Todo va a estar bien ❤ te entiendo a la perfección. Esta claramente no es la solución, pero siempre ayuda tomar once con tu gente cercana y comer sopaipillas con mermelada, a veces la vida se vuelve tan caótica, pero cuando como mi sopaipilla con mermelada siento que la vida es más simple de lo que mi mente me hace creer. Saludos desde Chile
Thank you for taking us on adventures with you Fran
Oh, Fran... this video was lovely! Thank you so much for sharing your experiences and feelings. I am currently going through a career transition. I feel so scared, depressed and anxious. At the same time, I have support from my family and friends, a nice house, nice things, and just like you, I don't know where this sadness comes from. Thanks for sharing, I don't feel so alone. Know that you are not alone either. We are all wishing you the best! You are special and loved.
Thank you for sharing with us Fran. You are wonderful and we love you. Glad you're taking good care of yourself. Sending you all the love and healing vibes xxx
Te entiendo completamente, estoy pasando por lo mismo solo que ahora sé cuáles son los pensamientos que detonan la ansiedad junto con los síntomas que físicamente me afectan terriblemente. Ya es un avance descubrir como ciertas emociones nos activan esto.
Intenta estar en el presente y atenta a cuando llega ese cambio de emoción para saber que pensamiento es el que motiva la ansiedad y por ende el resto de cosas. Un abrazo, saludos desde Barcelona ✊🔥
Fran you talk so beautifully about life
Te mando un fuerte abrazo, haces bien hablando de esto. Al mismo tiempo que puedes ayudar a mucha gente a no sentirse sola, también verbalizarlo resulta terapeútico para uno mismo. Me siento muy identificada con lo que cuentas, hace años sentía que lo tenía todo para ser feliz y no entendía de dónde venía esa tristeza tan exagerada. Creo que solemos buscar el problema fuera de nosotros (qué está mal en mi vida?) cuando muchas veces está solo dentro y es cuestión de identificarlo (traumas, asociaciones negativas, sentimientos reprimidos etc). Ojalá puedas mejorar 💛 y vuelva la energía para hacer lo que amas. Es frustrante sentir que quieres y no puedes.
Hola Fran, te veo desde que estabas en Alemania (creo que es la primera vez que escribo). Siempre has sido una inspiración para mí. Yo también estoy con depresión desde hace ya un tiempo y verte me da fuerzas. Espero que todo mejore pronto :)
Thank you for the discovery of Alex Katz art and for sharing your feelings & mental situation here. I understand very much and recognize myself in what you share so I don't feel alone in not knowing where it comes from and why it feels not aligned with my life context.
i felt so incredibly fond and appreciative of you while watching this video ❤ i’ve been following you since you were in hastings back in the day and you somehow feel like an old friend. i go through the same mental health stuff and have always appreciated your willingness to be open and honest about the difficult sides of life. i wish you so much peace and joy and graphic novel publishing deals!! thank you for being here ❤❤
Fran give yourself some grace! You don't have to justify how you feel, or why you feel that way; you just feel. And that's ok. Well done for sitting down with it and allowing yourself to experience it rather than trying to push it away. It makes me think of that 'Going on a Bear Hunt' Book - "we can't go over it, we can't go under it, we've got to go through it."
Fran, thank you so much for sharing and talking about being sad and all that stuff. It gives hope and support!
Hola Fran! espero que estés muy bien
Me gustaría agradecerte por abrirte de esa manera respecto a tu salud y a la vida en general, me parece muy valiente y valioso ese gesto. Me has ayudado un montón con tu visión sobre la salud mental.
Acá va la parte intensa ja: Estuve muchos años con problemas de salud mental que se volvieron muy graves, tuve casos de mala praxis, intentos de suicidio, brotes e internaciones en clínicas psiquiátricas. Durante esos procesos, en mis momentos de lucidez, me refugie en el arte, me guió muchísimo para comprender qué sentía en realidad y qué tenia en mi cabeza durante ese tiempo.
Ahora una vez recuperado estoy ante la decisión de estudiar ciencias de la cultura y arte, me da mucho miedo ya que está muy conectado a mi estabilidad. Pero al ver la vida del otro y los procesos que debemos pasar, me hace sentir que no soy el único, que no estoy perdido y que pertenezco a un mundo que me está esperando tarde o temprano.
Tengo 26 años y la verdad es que me alegra mucho haber descubierto a personas como vos, me sos de mucha inspiración. Ya hasta te he agarrado cariño...
En fin te quiero agradecer ya que con abrir tu vida también rescatas la vida de los demás.
Espero que sigas en tu camino y te mando fuerzas.
Saludos desde Argentina
You have the magic that I can’t stop smiling when I saw your face ❤ I’m so glad that you enjoy the life so much there and share all the beautiful moments with us ! Te quiero mucho !
Sounds like you are holding a lot of guilt for feeling down, but it is a natural feeling and it happens (especially with family history). Let that guilt be gone, because you definitely aren't at fault for the way you are feeling.
thank you for sharing your experiences! it made me feel so much less alone in what I'm going through.
Thank you for sharing your feelings on your depression. I live with anxiety and it can be crippling and make me house-bound. I also understand when you say you love your life. That is me too. I love this quote from author Agatha Christie who said ""I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing."
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Thank you for sharing! I enjoyed Katz’s work.
thank you so much for sharing your genuine thoughts and feelings 💜 after years and years of battling depression, I'm at a point of seeing it as a part of me. I feel like it could sound scary to someone else, but after so many years of trying to get rid of it, changing the mindset around it from battling it to learning to live with it truly helps so much. thank you for a great video, as always 💜
Fran, thank you so much for sharing about your mental health! 🙏🏼
i’ve had anxiety since i was about 10, and later on i’ve been diagnosed with bipolar.
so i relate to you saying that you don’t know why you’re feeling sad and down and depressed.
i often go through this “not knowing whyyy” too!
just wanted to give you a bit of a shoutout 💜
thank you for your vlogs, i love them so much! 🤍
sending you hugs! 💜💜💜
I always wanted to go. Never found the right moment. Thank you
oh man, I feel what you say about being depressed and not knowing why. For me personally it turned out that I was and am an autist with adhd the whole time. Now that I know I can handle bad times way better. I hope you feel better soon, too!
Thank you for sharing these insights about depression, I can totally relate and somehow I feel less alone now ❤ I’m going through an extended period of grief right now - I’m going to embrace the sadness too ❤
(Could it be from drinking too much coffee? Maybe the adrenals need a rest?) Sometimes depression is just about mourning what you lost. Getting to where you want to be can sometimes give you the space to let it all out. Maybe you finally feel safe to be sad without needing a reason. I think it's a good sign, just keep welcoming the feelings and tell them, "It's OK, you can be with me. " It's so brave to talk about mental health, so I commend you, Fran!
I resonated with your words on depression so much.
Linda, todo mi apoyo!!! te sigo desde el principio y amo lo auténtica que eres, muy valiente también❤ gracias por compartir.
You’ve been through a lot over the past few years, Fran. You don’t have to justify your feelings. You’re discovering who you really are and that’s a huge thing. Take care 💕🌈⚡️
This gave me all the feels. Thank you so much for sharing. You are an inspiration in being genuine. 🧡
I love you so so much Fran! A big hug for you 😺
For me is quite funny when you say that you're feeling sad all the time. I used to share the same thing a lot in therapy and what helped me a lot was remembering that when I was depressed I wasn't feeling anything at all.
I know that is quite unintuitive to think this, but I keep seeing it as an improvement.
When I was a kid I was definitely not allowed to feel these negative things so now that I'm alloying myself I learned how to adjust what is actual sadness and what is frustration/anger/tiredness.
I made some changes in my life when I was 'getting better' and now I change it back XD
I'm back to the city that I genuinely thought was not was not ideal for me. But now I see that part of my sadness was that I was not achieving the expectations of my idealized happiness, and in the end, it was just my childish idea of happiness.
im just sharing that so you don't feel alone in this situation. we are always adapting for the expectations that we have for ourselves.
Hermosa siempre, Fran. Vive tu tristeza con calma. Pronto te sentirás mejor. 🙌🏻
I don't know if this helps at all Fran, but it can be a relief to stop asking 'why do I feel this?' thinking we are choosing something, and remind ourselves that mental illness is a physical thing happening in the body. Our brain activity literally changes during depression, and in turn affects the rest of our body. I know that answer doesn't give you any helpful 'solution' but sometimes it is helpful to think of our mental illness like a broken leg or any other physical pain. Of course this doesn't mean we can't reach out for help or work towards better coping skills, but it is super grounding to have a reason why.