📌Want to learn more about how to win a negotiation with a narcissist? Come join me on my free webinar, the 3 MUST HAVE Secrets to Communicating with Narcissists right here: www.negotiate.rebeccazung.com/live
Thank you so much! This is my "boot camp" towards preparing for my meditation for my divorce on October 29! My power mantra will be "not today Satan, not today"!
Short update. Yesterday my narc's attorney deposed me. My narc was present, laughing at my answers and my forgetful answers. After close to two hours of answering questions it was my lawyer's turn to ask me questions. He asked 5 questions. I answered quickly while staring at my ex in the eye. We killed it. And then it was my turn to laugh because my ex got flustered. Thank you because these videos helped me.
Can't wait until the narc is deposed so I can watch his mouth fall open. His mouth being open is confirmation that he's been triggered. I love triggering.
Never wait for a miracle to happen in your narcissistic relationship rather give your best possible effort on your relationship to work and if it didn't work then rescue yourself from an emotional vampire instantly for your personal well being.
This is Exactly where I am Right now. He's very Mean and Evil when it suits him. Tries to trigger me!! Yell, says really mean and evil things then acts as if nothing happened!!!
It takes a lot of practice but you HAVE to master your poker face which needs to be accompanied by body language which is TOTAL non-reactiveness. If you have to say anything (not preferred) stay as vague and neutral as possible (really?, oh, ok, hmmm, etc.). Mirror whatever they say or do back to them. Yes, if you have to communicate at all, do so as an observer. Physically remove yourself as soon as humanly possible. Don’t emotionally engage 🙌
You can’t do anything with these people. Just trust your gut and move on. They’re definitely not shy of making you feel like you’re nothing at all, like you don’t even exist. Things that could’ve been easily resolved in a 5 min convo like mature adults, DOES. NOT. HAPPEN. Everything is about them and their needs. Them, them, them, them. One sided as hell.
My words: God created me (us) and sustain me (us). They are an open door to a peace land around me when i am terrified about all that IS going around us. I almost feel beyond. And that is the goal, the world can end but God Will still suport for your soul. Hope that this can help someone 🕊️
Being silent and calm,certainly observing their behaviour,their looking and being indifferent Mrs.Zung!!the last one is a great power from my experience!!🌟🌟👍
GROUNDED!! Stay grounded don't let people trip you up don't falter stand your ground don't allow anybody to make you change your mind and guilt you just have your feet planted like a tree roots and don't move in your negotiation or whatever it is you are involved in. Decisions, conversations, feelings about the wrong they did to you etc. Also double meaning, ground THE NARC like the child they are. Metaphorically send then to their room, put them in a time out.
I would say when they are triggering you try breathing! Because whether you realise it or not some of us hold our breath - they said what? And we hold on to it and onto it trying to ignore until they say that one remark too far and then you explode. So I'd like to add, breathe, be aware of when your doing it when your holding your breath in because if you just let it go, doesn't have to be a heavy breath, but something like, oh here we go again and sigh, that breath which you've just done calms the flight or fight response and in intense situations you have to remember to keep breathing when they're saying a shit storm of things to trigger you because my heart would go back to thumping and I might not control myself a second time, keep the oxygen flowing around your body. In pregnant women they say breathe through the pain, slow your breathing down so breathe, breathe though the discomfort but your less likely to give them supply by reacting!
Grace, is my power word. I was out w a nars and she tried to humilate me. I got up and said, " I need to take this bussiness call, take y time and I will help y into y car when y done eatting. I said, good bye to all the other ladies. I smiled and gave her a quick look. I kept cool untill we got into the car. I drove us to a quite place and let her have it by saying," no, more audance why did y say what y said? I told her her behavior was unacceptable and if she did not appoligize to me she would have to calll a cab. Anytime. She wants to go out w me to lunch, shopping, ect I am busy everytime. In addition, when I was in court w my 1st husband he was very narristic controling. I told the judge I felt theatened. She, removed him from the court room and granted my requests.
Currently in the stage of being discarded by a narcissist…. Oh well it’s going to be for the best! Amazing how trapped you can feel around these people!
When he tried to hoover… just ignore and never reply again. That is real strength. Block, delete and be done. You don’t need closure- you know what you are dealing with.
Well this explains so much! 54 yrs old now! For approximately 52yrs. My “bad ass” self caught and returned every dodge ball no matter how hard it was thrown. I have 1 letter and 1 word.
My power word and mantra is „I am who I am …and that is enough“. This means I am safe, and can handle are narcissistic situations, although sometimes even challenging for me 🤭.
BADASS is my word! This is SO helpful even if it's not a divorce situation these people are everywhere and what you're teaching is helping us empaths. Thanks Rebecca!
They're cowards at heart or those who're targeting me are. They can only attack me in a indirect fashion & never to my face & always in a group. To my face they're seemingly nice & caring so extremely two faced. They can be very easily wounded & when I look into their eyes I can see fear when they're alone.
Love,compassion,integrity,and power. These are traits I have naturally I need to remember who I am during this process of disarming these narcs,spotting em' knowing what to say to em' and how to look at it and move on from it without me being hurt by the relationship,situation or person. It's been years I've lived with 6 narcissists they are literally crazy people that think they can get away with illegal stuff but they can't because spirit catches em' then they have bad karma for it and the same cycle repeats
❤thank you! My big take away - observe myself observe the whole situation as an outsider ❤️ genius ❤️ They are such disorienting people. This education and research being done is so pivotal.
I'm 66 and live in an old age home with many other oldies. One of the two 'house mothers' in charge of running the building is a very toxic person who I classify as a narcissist and have told her to her face. Im a smallish person but i did martial arts in my younger years so am very confident and know how to defend myself. This horrible person verbally abuses the other quieter, gentle oldies who are petrified of her cos shes always shouting at everyone. No manners at all, just shouts in a very hostile voice as if they are criminals and bosses them around like she wants to. It makes me mad when she scares them cos they don't have the confidence to stand up to her, so she continues bullying them daily. I told the person who runs the place that im very close to reporting her to the human rights Commission. I stand up to her cos im cheeky and sharp and tell her off, which she hates, lol. Ive told her several times up very close and personal right in her face that 'I am not afraid of you, im not like these other timid people you bully and push around. Dont try your crap with me cos I know who you are, and you will NOT bully me!" 😅 Now she avoids me and I heard from the other lady that she was told to leave me alone. 😅
My power word is ... BITCH B = Believe = I believe in myself that I am a normal person and NOT crazy I = Intelligent = I am intelligent enough to see and understand what this narc is doing right now to me T = Trust = I gave myself the trust that I could manage the attach from the narc and observe the situation C = Cool = I am cool and a good person and no-one could manipulate me, I use smart behavior and tools in a smart way H = Harassing = No-one had the right or could harassing me - - - So the letters in the end went to a one word = BITCH. That's me in a nutshell if a narc attach me nowadays!
If you have not experienced it yourself you might even not understand what you say, although it is down to the point. When I met my narcissistic wife first time, I was confused as she had a different look than the other girls. I was thinking she is just different. Might be interesting. And I was not aware of meeting the dark side of it. I am now sure, they even do not know what they are doing themselves. As self destruction is also part of their life. In the end easy to understand, but in the beginning very confusing. Thanks for teaching us 🥰
Growing up in a family overrun by narcissists, my observations over the decades suggests that most everything they do or say, is simply in pursuit of the feeling of control. "Does this action or statement possibly bring about even a miniscule feeling of control for this person?" If you apply that question to every peculiar thing they do or say, you might be surprised at the answers you get.
Destroy the narcissist by mirroring their behavior back at them remember to add plenty of disparaging remarks and impugn their mothers virtue lol just kidding get out as soon as you can you can’t win with a narcissistic person just break even if you are lucky. Stand back from a distance and watch them destroy them selves.
I asked that question before. Would mirroring the narcissist the way they do others effect anything?? Would it cause them an injury or would they play the game in some way?
Mirroring trigger them and if they can't control you, they control the way others see you. They will destroy your reputation by fabricated and twisted stories.
One Year and half ago, I had no clue what narcissism was until I hit the rock bottom and luckily found therapist who navigated me to understand myself first, and then about this insane manipulative behaviour. I was refusing to accept the fact that these type of human species actually exists! I still struggle! When it comes to mirroring, once in a while when I got frustrated with them, I used mirroring to get on their level in my defence. It became hell on earth! They WANT you to mirror them! And when you do - KABOOM! RUN! They loose their minds and do horrible things, or become TODDLERS following with rage and tantrums! For my own safety I don’t mirror!! No matter what title they have, no matter how high is their position in their career - they’re broken human beings who were raised in a very distorted mentality! Knowledge IS POWER and looking back all this insanity makes sense today. My power words are A -ASSERTIVE C - COURAGE Thank you Rebecca for helping us to get clarity, and the courage to move on to n life. Love to all❤
I am powerful resilience in Yahuah who gives me strength 💪 calmness to fight 💪 my enemies who come up against me to devour my flesh but they died out like 🐝 bees 🐝
📌Want to learn more about how to win a negotiation with a narcissist? Come join me on my free webinar, the 3 MUST HAVE Secrets to Communicating with Narcissists right here: www.negotiate.rebeccazung.com/live
I can't wait to see you there!
Does this apply for no contact?
And can I hire you for a family court case in Florida?
The link is not working from my iPhone. It will not open.
What happened to hopscotch? All girls are on social media not playing outside anymore.
With some narcissists it’s better to say nothing. “Anything you say will be used against you in the court of a narcissist. “.
Love the pun!
I love this comment so much!
When someone shows you their true colors, believe them.
💚💚💚💚
Just remembering...the way others treat you is a reflection of how they feel about themselves...I feel better already 😁
It is called projection.
Integrity. Honesty. Calm.
Thank you so much! This is my "boot camp" towards preparing for my meditation for my divorce on October 29! My power mantra will be "not today Satan, not today"!
My power word is I know your true self, and I do know who I am, I will never lower my vibration for you.
EMOTIONAL “GROWTH” is my power word ❤. Thank you for waking my butt up to a NEW life!!!!
Short update. Yesterday my narc's attorney deposed me. My narc was present, laughing at my answers and my forgetful answers. After close to two hours of answering questions it was my lawyer's turn to ask me questions. He asked 5 questions. I answered quickly while staring at my ex in the eye. We killed it. And then it was my turn to laugh because my ex got flustered.
Thank you because these videos helped me.
Good on You💯
Can't wait until the narc is deposed so I can watch his mouth fall open. His mouth being open is confirmation that he's been triggered. I love triggering.
I need that laugh 😂😂
Life is like a mirror, smile and it smiles back, look at it angrily and it reflects your frown🙏
Never wait for a miracle to happen in your narcissistic relationship rather give your best possible effort on your relationship to work and if it didn't work then rescue yourself from an emotional vampire instantly for your personal well being.
This is Exactly where I am Right now. He's very Mean and Evil when it suits him. Tries to trigger me!! Yell, says really mean and evil things then acts as if nothing happened!!!
Just figured this out.
Amen🔥Amen🔥Amen
Amen
Same with my situation too
He’s so evil
I am a badass,I survived several murder attempts and I am strong. That's the truth.
My word is warrior, he can't do anything to me.
I like that word, yes you are in a war.
My power phrase is Easy Breezy Light and Easy ❤
It takes a lot of practice but you HAVE to master your poker face which needs to be accompanied by body language which is TOTAL non-reactiveness. If you have to say anything (not preferred) stay as vague and neutral as possible (really?, oh, ok, hmmm, etc.). Mirror whatever they say or do back to them. Yes, if you have to communicate at all, do so as an observer. Physically remove yourself as soon as humanly possible. Don’t emotionally engage 🙌
Very good advice!
Agree. It takes lots of practice though as you stated!!
Dodge ball taught me how to avoid a punch. Saved me a lot with my xnarc.
You can’t do anything with these people. Just trust your gut and move on. They’re definitely not shy of making you feel like you’re nothing at all, like you don’t even exist. Things that could’ve been easily resolved in a 5 min convo like mature adults, DOES. NOT. HAPPEN. Everything is about them and their needs. Them, them, them, them. One sided as hell.
no there is not much you can do with them.
Exactly!!!
Absolutely correct.
Really they don't exist for me, while working with them.
My words: God created me (us) and sustain me (us). They are an open door to a peace land around me when i am terrified about all that IS going around us. I almost feel beyond. And that is the goal, the world can end but God Will still suport for your soul.
Hope that this can help someone 🕊️
Being silent and calm,certainly observing their behaviour,their looking and being indifferent Mrs.Zung!!the last one is a great power from my experience!!🌟🌟👍
LOVE the idea of simply watching the words fly on past you. Thanks again for a great video❤️
GROUNDED!! Stay grounded don't let people trip you up don't falter stand your ground don't allow anybody to make you change your mind and guilt you just have your feet planted like a tree roots and don't move in your negotiation or whatever it is you are involved in. Decisions, conversations, feelings about the wrong they did to you etc. Also double meaning, ground THE NARC like the child they are. Metaphorically send then to their room, put them in a time out.
Thank you for writing this. Really resonates with me and my situation.
I would say when they are triggering you try breathing! Because whether you realise it or not some of us hold our breath - they said what? And we hold on to it and onto it trying to ignore until they say that one remark too far and then you explode. So I'd like to add, breathe, be aware of when your doing it when your holding your breath in because if you just let it go, doesn't have to be a heavy breath, but something like, oh here we go again and sigh, that breath which you've just done calms the flight or fight response and in intense situations you have to remember to keep breathing when they're saying a shit storm of things to trigger you because my heart would go back to thumping and I might not control myself a second time, keep the oxygen flowing around your body. In pregnant women they say breathe through the pain, slow your breathing down so breathe, breathe though the discomfort but your less likely to give them supply by reacting!
My power word is ‘Justice’…
Stay strong! ❤
Power word is
TRUTH
Grace, is my power word. I was out w a nars and she tried to humilate me. I got up and said, " I need to take this bussiness call, take y time and I will help y into y car when y done eatting. I said, good bye to all the other ladies. I smiled and gave her a quick look. I kept cool untill we got into the car. I drove us to a quite place and let her have it by saying," no, more audance why did y say what y said? I told her her behavior was unacceptable and if she did not appoligize to me she would have to calll a cab. Anytime. She wants to go out w me to lunch, shopping, ect I am busy everytime.
In addition, when I was in court w my 1st husband he was very narristic controling. I told the judge I felt theatened. She, removed him from the court room and granted my requests.
Self Worth (profess, confess, and claim the rest)!
"IGNORE!"
My power word... "Grounded"
My power word is unstoppable
I hated dodge ball too! At 62 I feel it was the perfect game for narcissists and sadistic people!
“Ic” is my ….I see myself. I see my reality unfolding. This moment is the chill and observations, and where my options are.
My power word is REFLECT! I reflect any negative energy back to itself.
Currently in the stage of being discarded by a narcissist…. Oh well it’s going to be for the best! Amazing how trapped you can feel around these people!
When he tried to hoover… just ignore and never reply again. That is real strength. Block, delete and be done. You don’t need closure- you know what you are dealing with.
Well this explains so much! 54 yrs old now! For approximately 52yrs. My “bad ass” self caught and returned every dodge ball no matter how hard it was thrown. I have 1 letter and 1 word.
Badass. That's my word. Thank you so much, Rebecca! It's a privilege for me to learn from your chutzpah, know-how and sense of humor.
Absolutely LOVE this 👍🏼🔥🔥
Strength, Resilience, Worth❤️
Bless you Rebecca 💞💞💞
Thank you! ❤
Watching these videos makes me feel not alone when I mostly feel alone once this a lot of the time
Thank you Rebecca. This totally justifies no contact is oh so sweet! Namaste!
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
My power word and mantra is „I am who I am …and that is enough“. This means I am safe, and can handle are narcissistic situations, although sometimes even challenging for me 🤭.
BADASS is my word! This is SO helpful even if it's not a divorce situation these people are everywhere and what you're teaching is helping us empaths. Thanks Rebecca!
They're cowards at heart or those who're targeting me are. They can only attack me in a indirect fashion & never to my face & always in a group. To my face they're seemingly nice & caring so extremely two faced. They can be very easily wounded & when I look into their eyes I can see fear when they're alone.
I appreciate you so much Rebecca. Thank you for helping us help are self to slay the narcissist.
Glad I could help. You got this! ❤
Calm..... strength........ fearless
Power word? I would have to say Warrior. I beat breast cancer, I can beat the narcissist!
My mantras: 1. No amount of their lies will change my truth (my power word: CHANGE). 2. Their volume doesn't silence my truth (my power word: VOLUME)
Proud of you! You got this ❤
Grounded and secure
I'm STRONG. That's two words but I like it.
My power word is honest! Stay honest, stay humble :)
Totally agree!
Love,compassion,integrity,and power. These are traits I have naturally I need to remember who I am during this process of disarming these narcs,spotting em' knowing what to say to em' and how to look at it and move on from it without me being hurt by the relationship,situation or person. It's been years I've lived with 6 narcissists they are literally crazy people that think they can get away with illegal stuff but they can't because spirit catches em' then they have bad karma for it and the same cycle repeats
❤thank you! My big take away - observe myself observe the whole situation as an outsider ❤️ genius ❤️ They are such disorienting people. This education and research being done is so pivotal.
Great advice about dealing with narcissists make more about this please. It sounds like you know what people are really dealing with
I like it! C.O.O.L. power words.
*Impervious "that's my power word!
Thank you , Rebeca, for all you do!
Glad I could help. You got this! ❤
"Aphra and Omega" - two words one meaning - God
I'm 66 and live in an old age home with many other oldies. One of the two 'house mothers' in charge of running the building is a very toxic person who I classify as a narcissist and have told her to her face. Im a smallish person but i did martial arts in my younger years so am very confident and know how to defend myself. This horrible person verbally abuses the other quieter, gentle oldies who are petrified of her cos shes always shouting at everyone. No manners at all, just shouts in a very hostile voice as if they are criminals and bosses them around like she wants to. It makes me mad when she scares them cos they don't have the confidence to stand up to her, so she continues bullying them daily. I told the person who runs the place that im very close to reporting her to the human rights Commission. I stand up to her cos im cheeky and sharp and tell her off, which she hates, lol. Ive told her several times up very close and personal right in her face that 'I am not afraid of you, im not like these other timid people you bully and push around. Dont try your crap with me cos I know who you are, and you will NOT bully me!" 😅 Now she avoids me and I heard from the other lady that she was told to leave me alone. 😅
Utterly grounded & unf*^kwithable
Yes power words are good and to remember them
Divinely Blessed
My power words: ACCEPTANCE & SELF-WORTH
Thank you so much!!!🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻♥️♥️♥️
Roar! It’s letting my voice be heard.
My word is : "I am not your putsching bag." Or " I am not you beast of burden. " Or " Don't expect you will feel better by putting people down."
POWER.... STRENGTH
"Cool words.." stay chill. Thank you!
Thank you Rebecca Zung🌹
Courage and radical acceptance
Proud of you! You got this ❤
COOL WORDS
My power word is ... BITCH
B = Believe = I believe in myself that I am a normal person and NOT crazy
I = Intelligent = I am intelligent enough to see and understand what this narc is doing right now to me
T = Trust = I gave myself the trust that I could manage the attach from the narc and observe the situation
C = Cool = I am cool and a good person and no-one could manipulate me, I use smart behavior and tools in a smart way
H = Harassing = No-one had the right or could harassing me
- - -
So the letters in the end went to a one word = BITCH.
That's me in a nutshell if a narc attach me nowadays!
Love this power word 😁
Leverage confidence
courage no matter what
Thank you!
If you have not experienced it yourself you might even not understand what you say, although it is down to the point. When I met my narcissistic wife first time, I was confused as she had a different look than the other girls. I was thinking she is just different. Might be interesting. And I was not aware of meeting the dark side of it. I am now sure, they even do not know what they are doing themselves. As self destruction is also part of their life. In the end easy to understand, but in the beginning very confusing. Thanks for teaching us 🥰
Truth, Authentic, Mighty.
Thank you. Resilience.
PROTECT. KEEP SAFE.
In my High School, Dodgeball was called "Murder Ball?'
🏃🏾✨️
Confirming confidence
Empowerment is my word!
Stay strong! ❤
My word is Warrior!
Leverage is my power word.
Rebecca!!! I love dodge ball! We’re not throwing it hard. We’re throwing it fast.
Thank you for having the read along. I can not have the volume on ( he’s always around)so this is great for me!
Meanwhile I am watching this video right infront of her because she doesn't know English.
Earbuds are my best friend!!!
Growing up in a family overrun by narcissists, my observations over the decades suggests that most everything they do or say, is simply in pursuit of the feeling of control.
"Does this action or statement possibly bring about even a miniscule feeling of control for this person?"
If you apply that question to every peculiar thing they do or say, you might be surprised at the answers you get.
I love this reflective statement- it's very helpful with a situation I'm going through ~thank you 🙏🏼
Interesting
My power word is Grounded!! I think I'll carry a rock.
Destroy the narcissist by mirroring their behavior back at them remember to add plenty of disparaging remarks and impugn their mothers virtue lol just kidding get out as soon as you can you can’t win with a narcissistic person just break even if you are lucky. Stand back from a distance and watch them destroy them selves.
I asked that question before. Would mirroring the narcissist the way they do others effect anything?? Would it cause them an injury or would they play the game in some way?
It can cause a lot of damage to ourselves. I mirrored my narc mom and it cause memory loss in me. Leave the narcissist is the best way.
Mirroring trigger them and if they can't control you, they control the way others see you. They will destroy your reputation by fabricated and twisted stories.
By the time you win the narsissist you might loss everything. It's better to not engage with them
One Year and half ago, I had no clue what narcissism was until I hit the rock bottom and luckily found therapist who navigated me to understand myself first, and then about this insane manipulative behaviour.
I was refusing to accept the fact that these type of human species actually exists! I still struggle! When it comes to mirroring, once in a while when I got frustrated with them, I used mirroring to get on their level in my defence. It became hell on earth!
They WANT you to mirror them!
And when you do - KABOOM! RUN! They loose their minds and do horrible things, or become TODDLERS following with rage and tantrums! For my own safety I don’t mirror!!
No matter what title they have, no matter how high is their position in their career - they’re broken human beings who were raised in a very distorted mentality!
Knowledge IS POWER and looking back all this insanity makes sense today.
My power words are
A -ASSERTIVE
C - COURAGE
Thank you Rebecca for helping us to get clarity, and the courage to move on to n life.
Love to all❤
my mantra.im rubber, your glue.
SURVIVOR!!!
Great words on you rebecca. I will be using all these tools when needed in the near future.... And thats no bull, so thankyou very much
Proud of you! You got this ❤
אוהבת אותך. את חריפה ! ונותנת לי המון כח בתוךמערכת היחסים הנוראית שאני נמצאת בה ולא יכולה לצאת בשלב זה. עדיין....
Oooo Rebecca I love you so much for describing PE class and having to play dodge ball
Fearless
Power thinking
Cool…. As a boomer just love that word anyway….. 🙏💕🙏💕 blessings Ms Zung
Thank you I'm going to try this now.
ARISE!!!
I am powerful resilience in Yahuah who gives me strength 💪 calmness to fight 💪 my enemies who come up against me to devour my flesh but they died out like 🐝 bees 🐝
Peace is my word😊
Thank u...
My RESOLVE!
Resilient.power.that is my WORDS..