@@Venomonomonom it needs a unique accommodation and treatment plan so maybe it's more helpful to categorize it by the dopamine deficiency rather than the symptoms
How dare you put my nose jewelry in the same catagory as meds! (This is meant to be a joke and yes both glasses and adhd meds are necessary for those who need them.)
I wish I had someone in my corner. It’s taken years of counseling to try to combat this fear that I’m an unintelligent, lazy, uncaring person. I still sometimes feel this in my soul.
I'm glad you said hyperfocus isn't always a positive thing at times. I have autism and I get annoyed when some ppl say it is a superpower. It might be for some, but not for everyone though.
@@DrTraceyMarks yep very much a double edged 'skill' If I'm ludicrously passionate about something I'm working on, like when I'm feeling the passion to write a track, well, I'm extremely giddy, silly, and just not thinking like other people, sometimes awake two days straight but no more. Also, harmless, not a problem to myself or anyone else... well I've ended up with such 'pressured speech' I've had all sorts of labels chucked at me, like accusations of Bipolar by people who think me having a look on WebMD for a nosey sometimes means I'm irrational, whilst they read NHS symptoms of Bipolar, aren't at all qualified, and expect me to obey their entirely imaginary authority over me. A good vid for you to do might be one on the similarities and differences between ADHD and Bipolar if you haven't already? Also how some people are both and the differences it takes in treating it? 😊
i am v interested in this comment, as i believe i have both but a more prominent everyday untreated issue w ADHD... i have the same questions too... unmedicated for both but feel like the adhd is a daily/weekly struggle/issue ... bp only v few times in my life an issue
This made me start crying and look up my old high school chem teacher to thank him for giving me accommodations that I didn't even know to ask for. I was always falling asleep in class, missing assignments, etc."Not applying myself," as some teachers might say. He saw the best in me, and privately gave me more time on very detailed chapter assignments. I never forgot him, and I never will.
I’m in Ukraine and my ADHD is out of control because of the war. All these terrible events, Russian war crimes, the destruction of infrastructure, the disappearance of electricity knock me out of my routine. But your videos help me a lot to overcome it. Thank you so much! ❤️
Omg!! I’m also in Ukraine and my ADHD also got waaay worse because of the war 😮😮 sending you so much support ❤️а чи могли б ви порадити терапевта чи психіатра у нас, бо я щось не справляюсь одним ютубом😅
I cannot imagine how awful things are for you, and all of your countrypeople right now. The fact that even in these dreadful circumstances you have the kindness, the compassion, to thank a content provider for their help, shows just how truly resilient you are as a brilliant, unique, precious human being, and how resilient your country is. The people of Ukraine have shown the world what true courage, and what true humanity, looks like - in the face of intolerable injustice, you respond with compassion, with love, with decency. As an individual and as a country, you are showing the rest of the world how to be better people, and I send you Myroslav, your family, and your country, all of my love. All of Ukraine will be free from occupation once more, I pray it comes soon, and that your essential services, especially getting heating to everyone, are restored quickly. The free world owes you a debt we can never repay. Slava Ukraini!
I think sometimes people say "we're all a little ADHD" or similar because they identify with the traits but don't want to "stigmatize" themselves. There can be a pretty toxic trait of living with undiagnosed ADHD and then assuming that you should cope with difficulties and others should too.
unfortunately there are psychologists who believe that ADHD is a “choice”, lack of consequence or moral thinking. that if you gave a person with adhd a million dollars they’d be on time, or they aren’t considering the feelings of their family or coworkers. I even heard these statements from a psychologist with ADHD. the mind boggles
The worst part for me is hyperfocusing. I can get sucked in for hours to be sure that all the lines are straight & columns are exactly even. It’s crazy weird! 🤦🏼♀️🙄
Thank you for this. I’ve been prescribed Adderall for 20 years (diagnosed 2003). I’m not a felon, addict, or recreational user. Still, every month I’m subjected to a process that seems designed to make one seem suspicious or drug seeking simply for trying to fill a prescription. It absolutely stigmatizes ADHD as a condition and those who have it.
Well sweetie, that's one of the unfortunate by-products of drug addiction. A cross we must bear, if you will. I call people out when they stay whatever snarky thing to me they think it's okay. Pharmacy techs are the worst. I just speak up, and ask why they feel that's okay to say. But I can't be bullied, but some people can be and that pisses me off. I'll speak up for them too.
@@sockpuppet2415 It is very much different. Limits imposed by insurers, the fact that an increasingly large number of doctors refuse to even prescribe them, and the fact that it requires frequent doctor visits and a prescription are all much more than just showing an ID. If you haven't had any difficulty obtaining your meds, especially with the worldwide shortage, you must be really advantaged, because every single month the hurdles I have to go through just to get my prescription filled is ridiculous. Finding a doctor willing to prescribe stimulants in the first place took the better part of a year, and then I had to wait months for an appointment. This is itself after over 10 years of trying every other option of treatment. And my insurance won't pay for more than 30mg of Adderall, even though I need 40mg. This month, after two weeks of trying to get my scrip filled, I finally had a pharmacy that had enough pills for 27 days. The month before was worse. And the month before that, it took 3 weeks to even get a prescription for 2/3 of my normal dose (which I mentioned above is less than I should be taking, anyway). On top of that, the medication my psychiatrist wants to put me on isn't available as a generic, so my insurance won't pay for it until I have tried literally every other option. I was diagnosed with ADHD over 10 years ago, and my ADHD symptoms have been adequately treated for approximately 8 months of that time. I can go to any place in this country that sells liquor, show them my ID, and walk out with as much as I can pay for. Not even close to the same.
@sock puppet Yes, I understand what you were referring to, but that wasn't what the OP was talking about. It's also not about insurers "denying" a dosage; insurers typically have an established dosage cap--which is all well and good if you're the kind of person whose symptoms are managed at a lower dose. Everyone's physiology is different and there isn't a standard dosage. They also have rules about how frequently you can fill your dosage. I have to wait exactly 30 days since I filled my last one, so if the pharmacy doesn't have it in stock on the day my prescription is sent, then I can't get my meds and I have to do without for however many days it takes until they have them. That's not how it works for any other medication I'm prescribed, and there is no reason that they have to make it this hard to get. I have not developed a tolerance to my ADHD meds; 40mg is the dose where I first started seeing some help with my symptoms. My insurance simply doesn't cover more than 30mg--and that choice is arbitrary, not based on any valid medical reason. Skipping meds on weekends is great if you're the kind of person who is capable of functioning without meds on the weekends. I am simply not functional without meds. But that's *entirely irrelevant* because I am already having to skip meds out of necessity, not by choice. Medication is not a luxury that I use to boost my performance. ADHD is not something that only interferes with my functioning 5 days of the week. It is not something that just makes me absent-minded or kooky. I'm frankly astonished by how many people with ADHD have suggested that I should just suck it up and take fewer meds when what I am prescribed is already not an effective dose and is not available when I need it, anyway. How about those of you who are capable of doing without it stop using it so that those of us who need it for basic functioning can access it? Wait, what, you believe you deserve equitable access to resources? Funny how that works, isn't it, because I also think I should have that access, even if it means I need to take medication every day. I can't imagine that you actually believed your comment was in any way helpful. Must be nice to have privilege.
@@rebeccabilly7466 I guess my son and I lucked out. We both have ADHD but we are not on Adderall (I heard about the shortage though), my son is on Focalin and I'm on Vyvanse. We were both originally on Adderall but it wasn't for us, hence the switch. We have to see either in person or via telehealth our GPs/PCPs every three months, but I have to call in, for my son, to get refills every month, and for myself, I use a system called My Chart where I can request refills/renewals online. When I was a kid, they would allow refills without calling, but because people have abused ADHD medications they've made it so no refills are possible without a new scrip each month. Which is just really taxing on people with ADHD. It's always people who don't need these meds making it difficult for the people who do. I don't know how it would work for you, but it may be worth a shot. Vyvanse is one of the few ADHD medications that can't be free-based, so insurance companies are more apt to give the higher doses because if someone does get their hands on your pills somehow and does something stupid, the medication is inert if free-based, it doesn't do anything at all. You would need 70mg + 20mg of Vyvanse to equate 40mg of Adderall XR or 70mg + 30mg of Vyvanse to equate 40mg of Adderall (non XR). Vyvanse wears down a bit slower too. I would crash on Adderall, when it wore off I would just drop, but with the Vyvanse the come down is gradual, rather than a sudden drop. Whatever you decide, I hope things work out for the better for you, being without needed medication is the absolute pits... 😰
I've noticed it makes me have more of the energy required to do the random unnecessary shit I don't actually need to do. So instead of being productive with important things, I'll hyperfocus on sorting buckets of nuts and bolts for five hours.
The Adderall and Ritalin shortages are directly because the DEA limited MANUFACTURING due to the unrelated, and misrepresented opioid (meaning illegal fentanyl) "epidemic".
As a person with ADHD on medication, stimulant medication was definitely not a cure, but the effects were life changing. The fact that most people naturally had that type of focus and internal motivation (that My body felt on the medication) was an astounding revelation for me. Also, implementing lots of tools and systems in place to account for my ADHD symptoms like weak time perception, hyper focus, impulsivity, and emotional dysregulation was super key as well.
medication was life changing for me too, suddenly the noise in my head settled down and I could see what are priorities and what are not. Today is my 1 year anniversary on Buproprion (Wellbutrin) and I celebrate!
I was just saying that to my doctor this morning. I've spent 39 years of my life suffering and never knew. Mind was blown when I first took adderall. "Holy shit this is how my brain is supposed to work? !!!!"
AMEN! The world gave me endless financial incentives to *not* have invisible mental health disabilities, but that’s irrelevant because contrary to capitalism’s mythologies of meritocracy and individualism - my neurodivergence is not a voluntary character flaw. Nor is accommodating me with psychiatric care and sensory infrastructure a “hand-out” any more than handicapped parking or lifts on busses.
I really appreciate your comments. Have seen you comment on multiple ADHD vids, but esp. this one really resonated with me. It's funny you mention handicapped actually, bc I keep having to remind my helpers and close ones that I'm not average- you wouldn't tell a "severely" autistic person that everyone feels stressed sometimes, would you? -- The following became a classic rant lol :D I know it's a cliche but SOCIETY really makes it freaking hard to function with ADhD, at least for me, after all my negative experiences that have pushed me down and made me afraid etc. I HATE that I'm envious of hyperactive ADHD ppl bragging about their talents and success. It's infuriating to me and my sensitive moral compass, that only the privileged adhd'ers get to be represented. I am once again ranting, but I'm so sick of feeling useless as a Mainly Inattentive type, trying to cope with bad Vyvanse side effects at dosage change, while others say Vyvanse instantly helps them calm down their thoughts and focus lol. I keep doubting myself and getting imposter syndrome bc I'm not a typical adHd boy. I've always been sensitive and much more cognitively hyper. Or rather, always hyper too, BUT SUPER SCARED OF PPL! Or bad ppl, that is. Massive trauma has ruined me, and it's frustrating realizing now after so long, but also comforting. I'm gettting tested by a neuropsychologist or whtvr next year after waiting for years.
@TayZonday coming with the absolute truth bombs! Capitalism really does reinforce arbitrary structures which penalize those of us who struggle with neurodivergence. Fortunately I've learned some techniques and exercises that help manage my mind and my life in order to accomplish some good things (well, along with the privileges that I have and a good amount of help from people that I am fortunate to have in my life), but it continues to make me extremely sad to see a LOT of folks like me (who didn't have a lot of privileges and advantages I did) who have been absolutely steamrolled, chewed up, and spit out by our capitalist society, and then stigmatized and shamed by neurotypical folk for not being able to compete at the same level, by the same rules that typical folk are able to navigate with ease (and usually with other privileges at play as well). Just observing this system in itself is enough to make me feel like I'm going absolutely mad on a daily basis sometimes. Bless you sir, and bless you Dr. Marks.
Ooh this is fun. I've never tried taking on a famous TH-camr in a comments section before. First, may I just say that chocolate rain is one of the most amazing pieces of music I've ever heard. Secondly, I do agree that modern society causes a lot of problems. Else, this is where our perspectives diverge. American Capitalism is too extreme for everyone's own good there. It is weird how they keep insisting on being cruel to the poor in the name of Jesus, and treat Poverty Traps like Commie propaganda even though Investopedia has articles on it. The problem is, is that if you have a centrally planned economy with the government in charge of the entire economy, it ALWAYS goes unbelievably worse, due to a psychopathic mafia always rising to the top. A Far Left 'General Secretary' is basically an Absolute Monarchy. Capitalism is in no way without problems, but I'm not quite sure of the last time anyone in the West starved their own people into CANNIBALISM with Stalin's 5-year plans like the Holodomor. If you think putting the government in charge of the entire economy is unquestionably a good idea, I politely suggest you look up the concept of State-Capitalism. Because that's what China basically is today. There, they have massive water shortages, are paying mortgages on properties that aren't even built yet, and Jinping has just made himself president for life as his cronies STEAL BODILY ORGANS FROM MUSLIMS. Furthermore, I am sad that so many people hear the word 'socialism' and immediately think of Marx and Lenin. They don't know the real truth about those two. Karl Marx, was a casually racist anti-semite [Letter to Engels 30th July 1862] homophobe [1869] who cheated on his noble-born wife and had a secret son with his maid. How Trump of him! Lovely Lenin Man of the people, GASSED PEASANT FARMERS who were revolting against the 'not bourgeois' bolsheviks stealing their food for 'collectivisation' in a time of famine. The Tambov Rebellion. Sounds eerily similar to donald trump having moms against police brutality tear gassed for the imaginary thoughtcrime wrongthink of doing a peaceful protest. "Russian Communism is the illegitimate lovechild of Karl Marx and Catherine the Great" - Sir Clement Attlee. Post-ww2 Labour Party PM. He was one of a long line of *British* Socialists starting with christian Philanthropist Robert Owen. Attlee launched the NHS, expanded the welfare state, other reforms and started freeing our formerly, immorally, occupied territories. He was a Social Liberal / Social Democrat, and he did far more good for humanity than Marx, Lenin or the White Russian Supremacist Soviet Empire ever achieved. Mixed economies are healthier, saner and more effective, than either USA Turbo-Capitalism, or the insanity that emerges in the aftermath of every bolshevik revolution. Change my mind.
@@TheHorseshoePartyUK Welcome to the party, ol' Mr./Ms. Not-the-Point. Being that you're in the UK, you can at least walk into a hospital without worrying about bankrupting your family.
Adderall not only helped with motivation, it improved my anxiety, and helped correct my sleep schedule. I had been diagnosed with depression and anxiety long before my adhd diagnoses, and tried all sorts of anti-depressants but none of it was really working. Finally got diagnosed with adhd and started Adderall, and now i feel like my life is finally moving forward
I have had a similar history to you and have just started Ritalin in the past couple months. It’s early days and still working out dosage etc. but I have to say I do feel a mild blanket of calm about 10-15 mins after I take it, and for a while I feel less anxious. Looking forward to possibly trying a longer acting one or a slight adjustment to the dosage to help with motivation more.
@@chelseagirl30 exactly the right words! "a mild blanket of calm". I take buproprion ('welbutrin') which is only one pill per day. I recommend. I take it in the evening because the stimulant makes me sleepy 😄Finally enough stimulant to calm down? I don't know. As long as it works 👍
Adult ADHD and hyperfocus really needs to be talked about more because it doesn't look the same as it does in kids, and inattentive and hyperactive also have some variations. I loved the money analogy, because I've walked away from great paying jobs and even dream situations due an inability to control my focus. Anyone who thinks that a person would just choose to do that really doesn't get it.
I love this. I hyperfocus on my art and it literally hurts me. People don't understand I don't eat, sleep, or take care of myself because I can't step away from what I'm hyperfocus on. And when I try I can't focus on anything else because my mind is still on my art. It stresses me out and I love the end result of my art but I think it physically hurts to hyperfocus.
Exactly! I've been learning a new style of painting, and half the nights the last two weeks I've gone to just practice painting one little element... And stayed up until after 3am painting, hunched over in one position, no food, no drinks, my back aches, I've had to go to the bathroom for hours, and i have to be up for work at 7am. Yes, i love art. But i don't WANT to try to be getting through my work shift on 3.5 hours of sleep night after night. I'm not intentionally choosing that.
Thank you for being perhaps the best YT psychiatrist/mental health worker. You're not a sell-out as opposed to others, and it does not go unnoticed. I hope you can realize how incredibly grateful so many ppl are to you. It takes so little to not only positively affects lives, but also to save them.
That would never happen because the ones on t.v are pharma paid shills 9 times out of 10. Which is one of the reasons the rich want to censor the internet. Control.
I’ll never forget when I was taking a test in the fifth grade, and after being the last one to finish, my teacher, Mrs. Lassiter, walked out into the hallway and said to another teacher, “I thought AIG kids were supposed to be smart.” I didn’t understand the emotion at the time, but I wonder if that’s where some of my anxiety originated. I don’t think a lot of teachers understand that children hear everything
Oh that's so awful to hear. Interestingly enough the teacher that tried to take me out of the advanced classes was 5th grade too. I know teachers have a lot to deal with, but sadly I don't think they get properly trained on how to think about kids with ADHD. So these insensitive comments cut deep at an impressionable time in your life.
@@DrTraceyMarks I'm having to deal with this with my daughters 3rd grade teachers. They are more concerned on how her accommodations may distract other students and less on how they will help her. It's heartbreaking how helpless they make her feel sometimes because she's struggling with a subject and make it seem like it's her fault when they are the teacher here and it's their job to teach her. It's very frustrating for parents out there dealing with the school districts.
This is so validating! The gaslighting, shaming, and mislabeling I've received in my life has given me a lot of internalized hatred, but also a great sense of humour as a coping mechanism. 🙃
Sorry to hear. I've had a bit rough time of it myself. Recommendations: Dr Tracey of course. Else, PhD Carol Dweck's Growth Mindset for logical self-kindness. Mark Manson for logical self-discipline, sideways takes on things eg his video 'the backwards law'. Uncommon Knowledge UK hosted by Mark Tyrrell, well in my experience that's the best anyone can get, as a substitute for actual therapy. His video on Inferiority Complex did me a lot of good, as did ones about anxiety. Then, this is a BANGER of a quote by Simon Sinek: "Confidence is believing in yourself. Arrogance is telling other people you're better than they are. Confidence inspires. Arrogance destroys" Also you're probably onto them by now, but Psych2Go is great if you're a bit short on spoons or time. Just trying to think of one last bit of Philosophy to tie this up with. Hah, that seems apt: "Who is my master? He who decides what I do or do not like!" - Epictetus. Born into slavery in ancient Rome, he became the most sought-out Philosopher of his time. Good luck!
I was one of the first to be diagnosed, OK, so I will show my age here. I was a junior in high school in 1987. The guidance counselor could not understand why I was flunking out of school because she could see how bright I was. Thank you for explaining this. I get so angry when people don’t understand what I deal with on a daily basis just being me.I’m 53 years old. I have never gotten a handle on it. It has been my biggest curse in life. It has also been a blessing, I wish I could be in the hyperfocus state more often. I cannot wait to watch more of your videos.
It must’ve been so hard back in the 80s and 90s when so much less was understood, not to mention that nobody really talked about any sort of mental illness or neurodivergence openly. Hope things have become easier for you over time. I am 43, and just only now trying Ritalin after a few times being diagnosed adhd in my adult life but now finally doing something about it.
The accommodations = advantage one hits hard. I've been stood in front of the class & had a teacher say I get to cheat because I'm stupid. I would like more support. It's insane the amount of things I've failed at or how much this has cost me in life. I've been told to drop my diagnosis to improve my chances to get into college. After 10+ years at my job I was put on an erratic schedule & been on the verge of being fired. I tried meds, therapy & begging for my schedule back. What has really hurt about this is psychologists & therapists telling me to not disclose at work. They are happy to drug me for the anxiety and depression from failing for so long but a simple schedule change could be life changing. Why is it ok for adhd people to be discriminated against. Why do I have to hide & just look like an irresponsible adult.
Thank you for making this video and for being so articulate in clarifying these things. I have both ADHD and Panic Disorder and I'm so tired of hearing how "everyone" feels like this. If it's an invisible illness - people are cruel regardless of how intelligent they allegedly are. 😞
This video is a teaching tool many employers and school officials should watch (to educate them on the manifestations of ADHD/ADD). For so long I didn't know how to articulate my struggles with ADD, but I'm learning so much from this channel. I honestly want to cry tears of joy because I now understand that my struggles to focus don't mean I'm lazy, or intellectually incapable. Thank you kindly, Dr. Marks for educating the masses.
the whole "creating a system that reminds you of the things that are important to other people for the sake of your relationships" is where SO many other adhd people have just decided to ignore and it's super difficult to deal with when I have adhd, and I've put in that effort.
Good on you! I'm guilty as charged, I always ended up discontinuing attempts to keep track of responsibilities after some time, but hopefully with someone in my corner I can be more mindful going forward.
Thank you for this, Dr Marks. One of the most pernicious myths about ADHD I've encountered (as someone diagnosed age 32) is that if you manage to do things like hold down a job, graduate with good grades, etc, you can't have ADHD. In fact, the clinician responsible for diagnosing me challenged me on this very thing! Yes, I graduated with good grades, but so much in life was dysfunctional, it was hell to get through, and I very nearly didn't. 'Success' does not invalidate ADHD! PS Been medicated for a year and a half and it is life-changing. Most noticeable is the near-total drop in severe depressive and anxious episodes. Turns out, sometimes, that treating ADHD is the first domino that needs to fall. I'd never go back.
Medication definitely leveled the playing field for me. I was diagnosed last year and I’ve experienced less or no depression, finally have been consistent in college and working towards my bachelors, and a host of other things. As you said, medication has its drawbacks but they are outweighed by the benefits for me personally.
Also, hearing that stimulants are addictive to people with ADHD is hilarious to me because I have to force myself to take mine. I filled my last 30 day prescription in SEPTEMBER! It’s not a good thing that I don’t take them more consistently, but it’s definitely proof that it’s not inherently addictive for us.
@@JohnsonKayla12 The reptillians feed off fear…masks were a metaphor to shut up about pedos..pedos are the real diease…Make educational mental health videos…🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩..my god you don’t even know what’s going on fool…Look up INDIGO children…we were the first with the message of ADHD and space children…I’ve been on meds for 30 years and you twenty somethings want to be us…well your not…Another one lost souls being scammed.. anyone can Tell you it’s from the bullshit of covid..3 months between Epstein island and covid you do the math…clog up the courts genius
@@JohnsonKayla12 I agree, I was a drug addict but I work hard so that one day I can come off the medication - I try to take it everyday now as that definitely works best for me, but I love the days when I forget to take it or intentionally don’t take it, because even though the medication I’m now on has barely, if any, side effects and works brilliantly, I still want to learn to live without it and have no withdrawal symptoms when I don’t take it, but when I do, I’m able to function and learn to be consistent with the routines I’m developing. There are lots of myths that can make life harder, until we know ourselves better 😊
I was diagnosed with ADHD at 14. My mom and my sister both have diagnoses as well, so I was taught to embrace it. It’s not a damn superpower. It makes my life hard at times. I have fibromyalgia as well, which compounds the inability to concentrate due to fatigue and pain. But I’ve learned to work with ADHD bc it’s part of me and how I learn and how I think. I found environments that allow me to be who I am bc people have been inviting and accepting and I’ve had limited barriers. I know a lot of people haven’t been fortunate to have that experience. I really struggle without medication, so this last year has been particularly hard with the shortage. I say all of this to say, thank you for sharing this video. I hope the general public learns more about ADHD.
Thank you so much for this. I have bipolar disorder and ADHD and I feel like people, whether in a good or bad way, take the bipolar disorder seriously, but think the ADHD is a joke. Very frustrating. Thank you so much for debunking these. Sometimes it's easy to think down on yourself instead of remembering it's actually a disorder.
So do I. Don’t take Adderall. It does not do well with bipolar. It almost killed me. I went into hypomanic states and did some strange things because of the Adderall and bipolar. Stay away from it. Far far away from it. If you have bipolar research, Viraylar.
The biggest accommodation that would have helped me in school (my major was English with an emphasis on creative writing) would have been internal deadlines on things like papers - stuff like "get me XYZ words at office hours after our next class meeting and we'll discuss any problems I see and how you can address them on the next meeting." This is something that would feel like absolute hell to a neurotypical person but little bits of feedback strewn throughout the assignment would make it so much easier to do the assignment in a timely way instead of cramming the whole thing in the last 3 days before deadline.
Dr. Tracy i just wanted to say I love when you where your hair out like this! Your curl pattern is gorgeous and i think the shape your hair has frames your face extremely well! Also really appreciate the video, kind of annoying that I’ve had to defend myself against people who have held all of these misconceptions to be true throughout my life. Keep it up!
I cried through this video. I have a child with ADHD. We’re dealing with so many of these issues. Luckily she attends a school who provides learning services to students with ADHD however, dealing with so-called friends and teachers who do not fully understand the effects of ADHD the myths behind them and lack of empathy, makes this journey so much harder for my kid. Breaks my heart. I wish every day I could trade places with her but I cant. I just stay in a constant mode of support, advocacy, seeking help, managing meds/therapy, being hyper understanding. But also finds myself overcompensating too offset a lot of negativity she deals with. I’m hyper sensitive and ready to ponce like a tiger when she’s being mistreated. It wreaks my heart. Just thinking I might need therapy on how to manage my own emotions around this. Feels like Im suffering to. 😓
Being in therapy yourself sounds like a great idea for you and your child’s sake! It’s a very loving thing to do because it shows her that you take your own well-being seriously and she’ll take that lesson in!
It’s important you get the support for yourself while you teach your child to self -advocate for herself too. No, you can’t stand in for her, but you can help her learn the communication skills and find the people who will be part of her « tribe » who appreciates and « gets her. « We can’t eliminate the difficult people we encounter, but we can help our loved ones to learn to identify trustworthy and respectful friends, colleagues, environments, etc.
Music helps and/or dancing. It's amazingly easy to focus once there's music playing in the background. I can get so much done and not even realize it. Dancing helps dopamine, even boring tasks can be interesting. Don't forget the random distractions. Have lots of hobbies, gadgets, puzzles available for the in between times when nothing seems to work.. and allow the hyperfocus, it gives a sense of accomplishment.
I really appreciate this video. I was recently so saddened by a therapist that I followed on social media that made a video saying people with ADHD needed to take accountability and implied that it wasn’t a real issue that required treatment.
I love your channel. I got my ADHD diagnosis and treatment this year, and now I'm helping my mom get evaluated too. Thank you for these videos, they are seriously so educational!
Would you be able to delve into Inattentive ADHD subset, and best practices to conquer it in one of your videos? I absolutely love your presentation of most topics and this one hits close to home as I've taken meds for this for nearly 20 years. Thanks for all the great content!
@@DrTraceyMarks I'm sure you know but for everyone else, inattentive has been majorly missed, since all their hyperactivity is in the mind, not running round classrooms and kicking footballs at daddy's new flatscreen etc, and I think Combined is the most commonly known type? I myself have lost much of my hyperactivity and impulsivity in middle age, but my organisational skills are increasingly failing. A curious thing I think might be worth looking into for your profession as whole, is this bit of a knotty problem. ADHD brains often love the internet for stimulation, yet 'normies' who destroy their minds with too much internet, social media, news, and just, Information Overload in general, show some of the same signs, eg, memory loss, concentration issues. So I think both groups are likely to face misdiagnosis at times? Also one Alzheimers site talks about 'Digital Dementia'. Nearly none of us can remember our own friend's and family's phone numbers anymore. We usually, remember how to google things rather than the information itself. This is a troubling road for humanity to go down in my opinion.
this is why i literally told myself there is no way i'm adhd im not like him ect... n same for all others in my life. this comment /reply resonates so hard for me as i am currently/recently navigating all of this...
@@katharinemiller6704 If you haven't already check out the channel How to ADHD, that was the one I started watching and all the bells rang and I was like "this is me". I was diagnosed with inattentive type before the summer this year.
@@3lmodfz Hi! I'm a fellow fan of the lovely Jessica and team. She is truly wonderful. I have a tendency to be cynical, and after a messy life, I can see through people on very little information and be correct in my assumptions 9/10 times, but she really is, just pure wholesomeness :)
I did want to leave a second comment that I had previously treated for depression and anxiety separately. I have generally not been a anxious or depressed person and have weaned off of those SSRI medications without thinking about it. Treating for ADHD with stimulant medication has helped with both anxiety and depression, as I am able to understand/regulate my feelings better, feel less self-doubt and hopefully to make better decisions for myself. I learned that the depression comes from me needing more “me” time because I have a habit of planning too many things in my day for those dopamine kicks hanging out with friends or hooking up. Anxiety has come from not knowing enough about a topic or person - so I just ask more questions and keep conversation “light” until I find something relatable - or it’s because I find the person in talking to to be very attractive. A lot of my inattentive ADHD/ADD comes from being alone and/or bored and it’s easier for me to manage - instead of fighting or resisting those feelings to force myself to work/focus.
I resonate with this video so much. Everything in this video has been a struggle for me. I've spent so much time watching videos on how to organize, be focused and productivity when in reality I probably should have been reading about ADHD and getting tested. I was put in special classes as a child because I was slow at reading or would "space out." I secretly struggled in school and work. My brother was diagnosed with ADHD and I've always had to work twice as hard in college and in a corporate metric driven environment. In fact I am working now. working so hard just to keep up and function even keeping a clean house is difficult for me. The only thing that drives me is grit and constantly working on myself to create new habits. I mean constant!
As a health literacy specialist, Dr. Marks' provides some of the most easily understood medical descriptions I have seen. Thank you for recognizing the need to share and then actually sharing.
I was a mental health nurse in the UK for many years and I think I just learned today a better language to communicate to and with my younger brother and former guardee about his ongoing struggle with his ADHD, thank you for that I think/hope your videos will help me to help him better.
@@panthercat38 If you're snacking / binging on anything with lots of HFCS you're likely making yourself more hungry as it tends to have that effect on people. Else here's a tip I had from a lady that helped me: Steadily drink water throughout the day. Stop 30 mins before your main meal. Here's the counter-intuitive part: Some people are drinking a pint or a litre of fluid with or straight after a meal, which just flushes their stomach through in some amount. End result: Hungry, binging. So: Do not drink anything with the meal or at least half an hour after it. It *will* be unpleasant but within 2 weeks you'll be more consistently hydrated, and have stopped this problem in it's tracks. If it's an actual binge-eating disorder, that is way above my level right now, sorry. Else I think you might benefit from Mark Tyrrell of Uncommon Knowledge UK. The videos that did me the most good were about anxiety, panic, and inferiority complex. Good luck!
and also the oposite, i have severe ADHD and i can (no its not the meds because this was a problem before hand) forget to eat for a day or two easilly, i get that we are forgetfull but is it possible to be so forgetful you literally wont maintain basic functions of survival?
All the years in school I felt feeling stupid. I always struggled with memorising things when studying. And that made me feel stupid because everyone else could do it and they’d get good grades. I was always behind and it really affect my work and self esteem. I never knew why. Earlier this year I got diagnosed with inattentive type ADHD at the age of 20. Not once occurred to me I might have it until I came across slow processing speed which gave me an answer to what I always struggled with and it related to ADHD! That’s when I discovered how differently it presents in girls vs boys. I struggle a lot with emotional dysregulation. That’s probably the way ADHD impacts me the most. Then there’s hard to focus, forgetfulness and not being organised part. Being diagnosed made me feel validated and proved to me that I am not stupid. Thanks for all these educational videos.
i have struggled and felt same, v recently diagnosed the exact same n twice your age, so it happened waywordly as my therapist got to know me better and see/hear all my patterns in weekly life... not sure how to change as i have felt "less than" in my head all these yrs for not remembering things fast or retaining info if not interested...but at least now finally i do feel validation
I know this is 5 months old but I have to thank you. I have only recently realised I really have ADHD and the symptoms you describe here match mine so closely they made me cry with happiness realising things aren’t my fault, and I’m not weak and lazy. Thank you so much.
This is so relatable. All my life I was told that I was very smart and creative, yet I couldn't turn in homework on time, couldn't hold down a job, just generally couldn't function like "normal" people. Then once I realized it was the ADHD and Autism, it felt so validating to know that there was a legitimate reason behind it and I wasn't just crazy or lazy or selfish.
THANK YOU, for the information this is what I am going though. So many years unable to complete assignments OMG EVERYONE needs to hear this video. Always say to myself What is wrong with me?🙏🏽
The thing for books with me...is that books I really liked to read...I could blast through so fast it was insane...but if i'm reading something i really don't like or identify with or are dense like some textbooks...It is SOOO hard to read and comprehend/absorb what i'm reading. I hate it so much. it's making college SOOO hard. I SUCK at 'studying' but i'm great at paying attention to lectures because I LOVE learning new stuff... so classes that are lecture heavy I LOVE. classes that are just "read this then do that" I struggle with SO hard. =/
Your videos are always so validating and this one tops the list! Also, I know you didn't ask for this but I LOVE your hair and I love the different ways you wear it on twists, etc! You are an inspiration!
Dr. Marks, I LOVED your "thick hair" example! That really resonated with me (and made me laugh). Even when I try really hard to pay attention when someone introduces themself, I NEVER remember their name afterward--no matter how important the person or dire the situation. I think I get distracted by the all additional information I process and file away (e.g., thick hair, lol), which I often do frantically just so I can remember that I met that person, but the result is that I just can't retain their name a few seconds after they say it....ever. Been trying to change that about myself for over 15 years, but after my recent ADHD diagnosis and your insight, maybe I'll start cutting myself some slack...
It's helping if you know someone else with same name and can think about that other person making some brain connection, but tbh I sometimes just saying straight away that sorry but I forgot someone's name if that person is important but haven't talked in a while 😂 if it's someone I talk incidentally I just say "hi" no names, I recognize that I know the person and we talked, maybe even remember 1st letter of a name but unless I have to contact the person for something I don't care, my brain flushes that info as not important, can't do much about it😅, if I like someone I'm also saying I might forget their name so they should not feel offended (although both "I forgot" and "I won't remember" depends if person seem to not get offended by that of course)
I would hear statements from other, "Well if I can remember, you can remember", "If you cared you would remember and not keeping putting it off", "I can create a schedule and keep track of everything. If I can do that, you shouldn't have a problem with that!", "You take too long to think about it, so therefore I am right and you are wrong!". This was before I found out that I had ADHD, but I knew my brain process was different. I felt so frustrated, misunderstood, and sometimes would blame myself. Thanks for making these videos. They are so helpful and really educational.
“We all have adhd” often comes from people with adhd who probably feel like everyone must feel the same way as them. This undiagnosed adhd makes them feel like “I did it with no help, why can’t you, or I feel the same way, and I’m fine” without realizing they fail at executive functioning, too.
I have ruled out adhd in myself for a long time because I was able to read a book from cover to cover and also learned very fast. I now realize that I was only able to do those things because I was hyperfocusing, meanwhile I wasn't eating drinking or going to the bathroom for hours on end
I'm not sure why your channel came up on my feed about ADHD but everything you describe about it resonates with me massively, I cannot for the life of me focus on what I want to do, overthinking everything I want to do but never get it started, I'll sit in front of the computer to do stuff but my mind goes blank after I've organised what I was going to do. It's affected me all my life and I feel I've never been able to achieve what I've wanted to. I feel I've never been able to turn to my GP or turn to anyone for help, I wouldn't even know where to start to get myself assessed or attempted to get diagnosed, I'm a father of an Autistic daughter too and since we've had her I'm more aware of myself and actions even more.
Dr. Tracey Marks, I just want to tell you that I have been following your videos for a long time, I am a therapist (still early in my career) and have learned so much from your content. Thank you for education around mental health and what to do about it. I use your videos to help educate my clients that have found them to be so helpful too! Thank you
My dad could not deal with me when i was younger. Child protective services were called constantly for the abuse i dealt with as a child. I constantly forgot things he told me to do and would call me lazy and stupid. Thank god my mom rescued me. My grades in school were horrendous. I had a fantastic reading level due to my understanding of vocabulary but i had zero retention with anything i ever read. To this day i am 36 years old and have never read a book.
I was a straight A student in a class. One day I took a test and totally blew off all but the first page completely unaware. Fortunately for me that professor detected something was wrong and the next day she took me aside and let me finish the test. Bravo for her. A rare breed at least in my day!
This has been really validating to read and hear. If my parents would have understood "if you cared you'd remember" and "you could choose to pay attention".... it would've saved me a lot of abuse as a kid. I'm sure many other commenters have similar stories. Be safe out there ❤
@7:30 spot on. I have ADHD, BPD, and an iQ of 147. Unfortunately I have NEVER been able to get the education I need to obtain decent employment, because of my issues.... It's a vicious cycle.
Relate. High IQ, also know enough it's a flawed metric. Also know enough to know that you can actually improve it, but by learning the skills associated with IQ tests, not by doing a bunch until you memorise how they work. Also Cognitive Flexibility, creative thinking problem solver who makes my friends laugh literally all day every day. A new idea for a great project at least once a week. Never start any of them, or get anywhere if I do. My house is a pigsty heading towards Hoarding levels, and I'm pretty 'off' in day to day life. If by BPD you refer to Borderline, it really can be well treated by DBT. It was quite a shock to find out Dr Marsha Linehan was sectioned for a misdiagnosis of schizophrenia in her youth, got out, got better, got trained, invented DBT, then later in life revealed she's Borderline herself. I'm no expert but it appears she's quite a religious type so for those who aren't her initial approach may need adjustment. I am quite sick of people with BPD often being regarded as manipulative, when from my time looking into it, it seems the vast majority of them are traumatised, and can get help to make possibly even full recovery, occasionally let their emotions run away with them in ways that *seem* manipulative...but really, no real malice there for the most part. All TARRED by a tiny few malcontents hiding behind a diagnosis that suits them better than Narcissistic Personality Disorder which is what these types really are I believe, though lack evidence for that belief.
This is awesome and I'm in tears feeling like I can't control the dependence. It is the mess. If I have my meds, I'm fine. No meds or fill on day 29 or some carry it and others don't...And all the generic versions are a mess. I keep getting two types are one is yuk. It makes me feel so bad.
Speaking on motivation even when your job is at risk, I went through a period at work when I had a project that was very highly visible to senior leaders and I was responsible for reporting for an entire sector. I was so incredibly unmotivated and I would leave work early to sleep. All of a sudden I went from a top employee to one who was at risk of getting fired. Contrast that to my current role where I’m problem solving and doing design work, and I’m thriving. I still struggle when I run into something not working and it takes longer than expected, it’s hard for me to get motivated to work through those issues. However my overall motivation is so much higher and I’m doing so much better. The whole time I thought I was just depressed, but now finally getting assessed for adhd
This sounds like me, in that I am currently regarded as one of the top employees but worried everyday that I'm going to be "found out" and be risk at being fired. What design work are you doing now?
My brother was absolutely brilliant. A local attorney, he taught about art, music and even used an old saturday night skit to expain the Iran Contra Affair from many years back. However, in grade school he could not spell. He had a teacher insist he was special needs. He talked of playing scrabble in that class and consistantly beating the teacher. The label followed him through our local public school system. He had to get permission to take a very advanced social studies. He had to get permission to take calculus. Fortunately he never gave up. Made it thru his B.S. with two business majors, made it thru law school and followed his dream into private practice. Yes, he was different from most. But he was ever so kind and compassionate. He never made a lot of $ but was a very good public defender. Sadly, he passed of a heart attack at age 53, four years ago. I still miss him every day. He was my closest human on earth. RIP FMS
#1: Thank you, Dr. Tracey Marks! Yes! It hurt a lot more than I would have liked when I told my aunt recently that my ADHD has made many things very difficult for me, and she returns with "Well, a lot of people have ADHD" (so what's your excuse?). I'm in my late 20's and so when I was diagnosed with "ADD" as a child, it was around this boom idea that this was some new excuse for children's bad behavior and that people just wanted to medicate the children. The stigma that ADHD is just a fake thing to excuse laziness and a lack of will power has been so harmful for my mental health for so long. Even my own mother (we're not even biologically related funnily enough, I'm adopted), age 59, struggles; I can see how difficult life always is for her because of the condition, but she always falls into berating herself, me, and others in our family who have been diagnosed with ADHD. I've been very patiently trying to reinforce that she isn't a failure for the parts of her who can't always keep up with other people. I can see how much it has brought down her self-esteem being seen as a flake and always forgetting things she shouldn't. Even with the treatments in place as of today, it's not enough to alleviate all of the different executive dysfunction going on a daily basis. I can't stress enough that I'm not looking for excuses, only a little patience and understanding for things I can't always do the same as others. It's also difficult because ADHD and autism are both neurodevelopmental disorders, like cousin conditions, but ADHD is always, always seen as like a normal person thing, while autism is more often seen as something to take seriously. ADHD can be just as debilitating, ADHD also has a spectrum of severity. I grew up having to deny that ADHD is a disability at all. When I entered the working world, it was still a bit of a shock to see ADHD listed as a legal disability. #3: Oh, my god. Yes. That happened at the end of my last relationship "If you really loved me, if you really cared about our future, you would get your life together so we can go forward." Which 100% wasn't true. It was so sad. I did my best, but it's like depression can exacerbate the ADHD symptoms because suddenly -nothing is interesting enough to do-, even if you really want nothing but to suddenly become superman and do all of the things necessary to "get my life together". Plus, things like depression, ptsd, cptsd, can make all of the normal ADHD struggles, like memory, almost insane levels of impossible. #5: So true, like you mention earlier in the video, some people with adhd might become sometimes borderline genius when it comes to subjects that "stimulate" them, but even me, I was just such an average student in school, I thought I was an idiot. lol #7: I really need a new psychiatrist. I told my psych, (he's an NP), that I was getting certain side effects from my meds, and that they don't bother me (jitters, staying more focused, muscle pain, higher heart rate, feeling more energetic, feeling more cheerful and jolly, etc.) and he just said "Oh, we don't want those. That's not what it's supposed to do. It's supposed to make you feel calmer." Like Um, I have inattentive ADHD, I DON'T NEED it to make me feel calmer. I'm already a calm person and my anti-depressants weren't doing enough to make me feel more happy, energetic, and productive, why is this a bad thing? I get the potential for heart problems, but I was doing like you mention here, taking breaks every few days for my heart. But that wasn't enough for my NP, he ended up taking me off to see if "it really was" the meds causing my muscle pain. I tried to tell him that when I'm not taking them, the brain fog gets so bad, so, so bad that I'd rather have the muscle pains than to not have the extra kick in my mental ability. But no... It's been weeks off of my adhd meds and I've been so unproductive. Ugh! He's so frustrating because he's always making it out like I'm lazy and not doing what I should to "be an adult". At this point I have no issue leaving and saying "I just don't feel like I'm getting the quality care that I'm looking for anymore". He treats me so disrespectfully in my opinion. I'm so sick of it! He's so pompous and full of himself, I loathe practitioners who don't listen to their patients and always treat them like hypochondriacs. "Well, she's definitely anxious" (He said this to my mom because she also sees him). BS, yes, I'm an anxious person, but not for those reasons. My NP is of the dated belief that "mostly boys have autism", how can I take a person like this seriously??? Like, don't you have to take continuing Ed?? Man, I wish you were my doctor, Dr. Tracey. I much prefer to have a practitioner who actually cares about and is constantly curious to learn more about their field.
Number 5. 👿 Years ago, I had a professor for college algebra who just flat out told me, on the first day of class, that it had "been her experience" that students with accommodations get lower grades and are not as likely to do well in her class. Fairly quickly, I discovered the reason for this being her experience-- she tried repeatedly to deny me the extra time and quiet environment I was entitled to. I was a STRAIGHT A student (and FWIW, I qualify for MENSA and used to be a member). But in her class, I barely managed a C. It ruined my perfect 4.0, and even though I passed, I retook the class for grade forgiveness to regain it and kept that 4.0 through trig, three semesters of calculus, and two more of differential equations. This video should be required viewing for anyone in a teaching profession.
The How to ADHD channel by Jessica McCabe is your friend! Truly. There may be people with more knowledge out there, possibly, but if so, I doubt they communicate it as well to our ADHD brains!
@@TheHorseshoePartyUK yes i know her channel for a long time, she actually helped me to be diagnosed because i learned a lot about myself from her content😊
@@a_deputy She really is wonderful, I adore her and would wife her in a heartbeat. I've reasons to be wary of people who seem so nice, but she just radiates complete wholesomeness! Not one selfish nor malicious bone in her body!
I’m literally crying right now. As an adult I feel like I was able to overcome a lot of these things I’ve struggled with. I remember in school I was bullied for being big and stupid and I thought that about myself for most of my life until I til my mid 20’s I’m now 32. I own a small business and am a master dog groomer and I teach how to groom too. I also manage a coffee shop and I am a mother to a baby boy. I’m crying because I really never thought to learn anything besides what I was told about my inattentive ADD and I had no idea it effected me in other ways like my emotions or self regulation or even executive function. So I’m here on TH-cam now going down a rabbit hole because my son appears to have many of my same symptoms and I want to do everything I can to enable him to cope better than I did.
Ppl think I'm lazy. And I'm a loser. I'm a loner now just me and my family. Just started Strattera I hope finally my ADHD gets better 🙏 God bless everyone. 🙌
Thank you! I'm currently in the process of diagnosis, because literally everything in my behaviour is pointing in the direction of ADHD, but it's so hard to get people to see what I struggle with every day. Even my parents didn't really believe me until they spoke with their pscychologist friend, who knows people with ADHD. And every time someone tells me "oh, I have it sometimes as well, you don't have to label yourself as sick", I just start to feel guilty, that perhaps I really don't have it, and me having a hard time finishing university, remembering things, etc. is just because I'm lazy. I have to remind myself pretty often that no, it's not my fault, don't listen to random people, and by starting the diagnosis process I'm already on the path of getting better. Videos like this help me a lot. I cannot even express how grateful I am to people like you, who spread awareness of this disorder and debunk the myths around it
The normies are the natural majority that keep things stable. Us more unusual people, we are the natural minority that brings interesting changes due to our sideways perspective on life. Example: Einstein widely regarded as autistic due to his extremely high intelligence at Physics, yet bumbled his way through his personal relationships. Richard Branson of Virgin fame, is ADHD and Dyslexic. Many say Bill Gates is both ADHD and ASD, but no proof yet. Sometimes in footage though, there's hints he might be
That terms gone out of fashion now, so they call it ADHD Inattentive type. Just the whole thing is poorly named and we need something more accurate, and less stigmatising. Someone had a great one and of course, I can't remember it. I like the term "Attention Modulation difficulties and possible Impulsive Hyperactivity" but not exactly snappy. My mate had a great one too. Seems there is some trend of Hyperactivity and Impulsivity tailing off a lot as people get older, at times. Like I got up to LOTS of shenanigans as a teen and young adult, that I've only more recently realised were.... extreme. These days, too tired to cause trouble. Increasingly disorganised, no diagnosis, no help. Also not sure Stims would be best for me. Great first line treatment for many, but given my experience of partying, they'd be last resort for me.
Thank you so much I relate to everything you spoke about. As an adult diagnosed at 48, with ADD and ADHD. (I was diagnosed with Dyslexia in my late 20's). I really appreciate and resonate with your area of expertise. Even at the ripe old age of 50 I sometimes find that I get sucked into the myths perpetuated by others. Thank you once again I feel I have so much clarity about ADHD 💙💚💜
Thank you so so much for this video. I've always had trouble with my mother and her disconnect in understanding how ADHD affects my entire life, that it's not just "makes me hyper sometimes disorder." I did 'well' in school (struggled silently and sometimes loudly but wasn't heard) and I graduated on time from college with good grades. My anxiety was barely enough to get me able to submit assignments by a deadline, which is how I was able to survive: not even starting assignments until the night before and being up until 6am writing papers because my brain finally let me when the anxiety threshold was high enough. Looked like procrastination, but really was executive dysfunction. Anyways, thank you for another informative and easy to understand video! You really are making a difference :)
This gave me a much deeper understanding of ADHD than I've had most of my life. And it helped me also understand that my ongoing struggle to focus due to dissociation, and need to focus extremely intently to perform everyday tasks are interfering substantially with my quality of life. It adds fuel to my fire of tackling my PTSD on all fronts. It's slow going, but I chose this path for reasons I believe in fiercely.
I am 26 and I just stumbled onto your channel. ADHD med side effects are nasty for me and I have been trying to understand how my own brain works and surrounded by family that swears by the "if you cared enough you'd be able to do it" and "you need more effort". Watching your videos (Several others about ADHD) has given me an understanding of myself I didn't posses. Amazing content and I hope others find it as helpful and weight lifting as I did.
Your content on ADHD has been a great help to me when I was explain to my family what am I go through. I was diagnosed as an adult, and my struggles were always takes as laziness and all that comes with it. Now they are open to learning about it, so your videos worked perfect an answer to some of their questions. Thank you
Yep. I'm living with my OAP parents at the moment, and they keep overloading me with too many things I need to do for them. I can't pick one to start. Nothing gets done. So I tell them to prioritise the most important one, and then another one or two to do, and then I'll come back for more later :)
I don't know if i have ADHD or not i just find myself watching these anytime i search symptoms im having. Whether i have it, i dont know, i just know im miserable. Literally everything in my life is being affected by it. I want to see a doctor, but procrastinate because i get anxiety anytime i think about doing that or anytbing for that matter. I cant focus at work, or home. Even hobbies. I start to work on something and 2 seconds in get anxiety and almost forget what im even supposed to be doing. Idk. This comment is all over the place. Thats kind of my life though. Hopefully i figure something out. Im working on it.
I think alot of people with adhd can relate how shit it feels or felt to hear "you're just so lazy" from other people. It really starts chipping away at your confidence the more you hear it
Thank you so much for this video, Dr. Marks. You explained things way better than I ever could have. It's hard to live with ADHD, but it's nice to know I'm understood and not alone. 😊
Thanks for these videos, doctor. Most of this resonates with me. I’ve tried talking to close ones about this but have always been told “you’re not hyperactive at all,” “no one wants to do that, you just need to rip off the bandaid, etc.” I’m 44 years old and have never been diagnosed, but maybe this will be enough to get me to start talking to professionals. I feel like people will think I’m just trying to get drugs. This has helped, though, and would explain all sorts of things that affect my work and personal life. Thank you
Have recently been hyperfixating on your channel and videos and it’s been SO validating for me in knowing I’m not “making this up” as so many people tend to think. I finally sought treatment for my ADHD after I turned 26 (grew up in a household that did not believe in doctors or mental health awareness) and honestly I do sometimes get hung up on “How much more successful could I have been had I been properly treated at a young age?” - but ultimately; I’m glad to have treatment now because at 34 I finally feel like I’m a somewhat capable human in society even though I have limitations within my executive dysfunction. I’d really love to hear your thoughts or analysis on folks with ADHD who also live with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome.
I am a few months away from turning 40, and I only learned about having ADHD less than a year ago. Your videos have not just explained to me what it is, but have explained almost every difficulty I've experienced in my life. These videos are healing and affirming. Thank you for the work that you do.
I always get distracted by hair, earrings, jewelery or even shapes on peoples faces. I get into all types of tangents with people if I have to pay attention. I never attributed that to my adhd.
YESS distracted by hair. By hair!!🥲 and then by my clothes and shoes or my contacts, then feeling uncomfortable in my sitting position and really any other position too... I've had those things all my life but never even noticed (I have an incredibly hard time taking notice of anything inside but also outside of me). And now I just keep being... stunned/speechless or whatever all the time when I finally realize those things. How in the world did this go undiagnosed until nearly 20 years living like that😶😶
Dr. Tracey, this video was VERY helpful for me. The example of immediately forgetting a name that was just said is a troubling experience that I've had. I feared it was a memory issue independent of the ADHD. Thank you for continuing to do these videos: you provide what we (I at least) cannot otherwise find.
I really wish that you were the Dr my parents took me to as a child. It's scary how accurate you are. Even at 42, I still constantly struggle and it unfortunately does affect those around me and has even just caused the end of my ten year relationship. I have tried to not be this way and tried so many different methods to overcome this, without success. I don't know what to do anymore and constantly feel lost and directionless. Thank-you for your channel.
I was depressed for years, since middle school all throughout highschool until just last year when I finally got the courage to return to college after a 2 year break. I felt dumb cus I never completed tests, and I rarely did hw. Never studied, so I did bad in the classes I didn't like. My parents were constantly reminding me about how lazy I was, and telling me that I should make myself useful. I always had a terrible self esteem and doubted myself. Still recovering from it. But at least now, knowing that adhd is a thing, and being on 56mg concerta as of recently, I've been able to get things done and not procrastinate as much, focusing a lil more. Feeling more confident
Dr you are amazing ...very clear and easy to understand. I dont usually make it trough the entire video , but im cleaning right now and listening to you with my headphones ,so its much easier for me to listne to the entire video. I also send these to my wife so she understands. Thank u
I really appreciate your videos, from the trichotillomania to ADHD, it doesn't make me feel bad for my past actions but validated. This makes sense when it came to school - HATED English/Grammar but loved science/biology, and work - HATED working in bankruptcy but love working in Research (finding problems and fixing them). When I was prescribed Wellbutrin and Adderall, yes, I focused and got work done, but in the beginning, I felt like a zombie, stopped eating as much and then became REALLY snappy at my family.
People online being wrongheaded in their good-intent, often frame stims as being 'not addictive for ADHD brains' which is simply not true. They're a great medication for ADHD, but people do need to be careful with them and treat them with respect. Eg people I know, well one in USA takes his only during the working week, then avoids them on weekends. That he is capable of doing that with stims, is proof itself that ADHD brains are wired differently imo. Stims in the hands of normies are some of the most addictive substances in the world.
I literally almost lost my business because I couldn't focus on certain tasks, the tasks that needed to be completed in order for me to get paid, and no amount of money was enough to get me to focus.
When I admitted to struggling with motivation and that it might be due to ADHD, my parents' response was for me to stop being dramatic, put in the work, and "deal with it myself" since I studied Psychology in uni. I'm working now and more overwhelmed than ever despite previous experiences of being burned out of my responsibilities and having to jump through hoops to catch up. I'm going to see a psychologist in a few days to see if she concurs with my hunch, and how I should proceed one way or the other.
how are you now, a few months along? I hope you got a diagnosis and some medication. I got Buproprion and it made such a difference. 'A blanket of calm' another poster said. Finally able to look over everything and notice what are priorities, instead of every grass screaming at you at eye ball height. I also rearranged my view on life and what concists of a useful day and that helped too. And delegating what is a bore to me (or a tyring chore) and shoulder shrug if I do things my way (like not taking a shower every day, not doing social networking via drinks 'n meets and paying someone to do my groceries and cleaning my house.) Hope you are well :)
I don't take stimulants but I definitely relate to being perceived as drug seeking when your prescription is out of stock. I know I'm also just hard on myself for needing medication at all so that situation exacerbates that self judgement.
Wonderful video! W hilariously accurate examples .🤣. 34- I've recently been diagnosed and my dad definitely doesn't believe or understand the struggle I've been dealing w most of my life. Videos like this help me feel heard and understood. 🙏💚
P.s burst out laughing w your forgetful name example. I finally had the courage to be matter of fact and say to ppl " remind me your name again?" Until one person responded " .....jason..you ask me everytime you see me....." 😐😳💀busted. I forgot that I always forgot the poor guys name and frankly face! But he always approached me when I was all over the place in my head.
YOU are AMAZING! I recently came across an ADHD vid. I've seen a few since. I am going to be 55 y/o in Aug. June 14 I go for a 3 hour appt to get a diagnosis for which I believe is ADHD. I can relate almost 100% every time I watch one of your vids. I especially appreciated your examples. Hopefully it will help not only ourselves, but those who care about us.
I love your video’s, they have helped me explain so much to my family and friends, and they are also how I first thought about me having adhd. Thanks so much and I hope you continue to make great videos like the ones you already have.
Thank you so much for all of your amazing content over the years. I have burst into tears watching several of your videos because I had never felt so seen. I’ve been on and off medication since the sixth grade- sometimes stopping for years in between because I gave into the stigma surrounding adhd medication. But now at 31 I can say that medication has been a huge benefit for myself. Of course managing the side effects of the medication can be a full time job itself. It’s hard work just remembering to eat, but the benefit outweighs the cost
I just found this video and have had my eyes opened. I've seen a lot of myself in my daughter as she grows up. She was diagnosed as ADHD and has been on medication for a couple years. But this video helped me to understand everything I feel on a daily basis. Maybe I should figure out how I can get diagnosed.
My mother, born in 1945, had it. I have it. Our lives were blighted by our ADHD. We thought we were stupid and worthless. Oddly enough, our ADHD got much worse at puberty. I mean we went from bright students to almost zeros almost overnight. I tried stimulants at 45, but I had a major allergic reaction to all of the brands. At 57, my mind has deteriorated so much that I can no longer work. Any boring task makes me very tired and sleepy in about a minute and I can no longer take intelligent decisions or focus on anything for very long. Thankfully, I was able ro retire. I’m bored, but I won’t volunteer because I am so stupid and slow!
Stupid, how so? You've taken thought turned it into action and given a precise of some of your experiences. A loving, caring, sacrificial act. I say thank you, but I do not agree you are stupid. I have learnt from yours and others' comments. I am grateful.
did you try desoxyn? A friend of mine had bad reactions to all of them and that was given by their dr as a finall go at it and it totally turned the table around for
This is great. I have bipolar two disorder with anxiety and ADHD. I work full time and I struggle every day. I wish everyone would educate themselves on these topics so they can have empathy for others. Thank you for these wonderful videos ❤
Ironic how it's the most researched DISORDER yet one of the most misunderstood ones by the general public lol
By design. Hyperindividualist societies have no place for the neurodivergent.
It needs a new name
@@PjRjHj Maybe it could help to categorize ADHD together with some other neurodivergent conditions?
@@PjRjHj it's name is literally just the two symptoms that annoy neurotypicals the most.
@@Venomonomonom it needs a unique accommodation and treatment plan so maybe it's more helpful to categorize it by the dopamine deficiency rather than the symptoms
Saying ADHD meds are a crutch or an unfair advantage is like saying the same thing about glasses 🤓
How dare you using eye enchantments! 😂
How dare you put my nose jewelry in the same catagory as meds! (This is meant to be a joke and yes both glasses and adhd meds are necessary for those who need them.)
This is literally my favorite metaphor!
Nose jewelry haha.
I thought you were referencing cocaine lol
@@lecrishaevridge7278 hahahaha then I guess it's a double pun and it does reference meds!
I wish I had someone in my corner. It’s taken years of counseling to try to combat this fear that I’m an unintelligent, lazy, uncaring person. I still sometimes feel this in my soul.
I'm glad you said hyperfocus isn't always a positive thing at times. I have autism and I get annoyed when some ppl say it is a superpower. It might be for some, but not for everyone though.
True indeed. It can REALLY be a problem as I'm sure you know.
@@DrTraceyMarks yep very much a double edged 'skill' If I'm ludicrously passionate about something I'm working on, like when I'm feeling the passion to write a track, well, I'm extremely giddy, silly, and just not thinking like other people, sometimes awake two days straight but no more.
Also, harmless, not a problem to myself or anyone else... well I've ended up with such 'pressured speech' I've had all sorts of labels chucked at me, like accusations of Bipolar by people who think me having a look on WebMD for a nosey sometimes means I'm irrational, whilst they read NHS symptoms of Bipolar, aren't at all qualified, and expect me to obey their entirely imaginary authority over me.
A good vid for you to do might be one on the similarities and differences between ADHD and Bipolar if you haven't already? Also how some people are both and the differences it takes in treating it? 😊
Sometimes I'll be hyperfocused on the dumbest things lmao
i am v interested in this comment, as i believe i have both but a more prominent everyday untreated issue w ADHD... i have the same questions too... unmedicated for both but feel like the adhd is a daily/weekly struggle/issue ... bp only v few times in my life an issue
Same!!! I likely have high functioning autism with ADHD(diagnosed) i have been able to feel accepted and understand for once in my life
This made me start crying and look up my old high school chem teacher to thank him for giving me accommodations that I didn't even know to ask for. I was always falling asleep in class, missing assignments, etc."Not applying myself," as some teachers might say. He saw the best in me, and privately gave me more time on very detailed chapter assignments. I never forgot him, and I never will.
This brought tears to my eyes. You’re so lucky to encounter such a compassionate and thoughtful teacher.
Call him- let him know! He'd be touched.
I wish I had done this with some of my remarkable teachers. Hindsight is 20/20 they say…
I’m in Ukraine and my ADHD is out of control because of the war. All these terrible events, Russian war crimes, the destruction of infrastructure, the disappearance of electricity knock me out of my routine.
But your videos help me a lot to overcome it. Thank you so much! ❤️
Omg!! I’m also in Ukraine and my ADHD also got waaay worse because of the war 😮😮 sending you so much support ❤️а чи могли б ви порадити терапевта чи психіатра у нас, бо я щось не справляюсь одним ютубом😅
@@vintagesoniia sending you both much love. I hope you'll get through this strong and safe 🖤
Sending love and support from America
I cannot imagine how awful things are for you, and all of your countrypeople right now. The fact that even in these dreadful circumstances you have the kindness, the compassion, to thank a content provider for their help, shows just how truly resilient you are as a brilliant, unique, precious human being, and how resilient your country is. The people of Ukraine have shown the world what true courage, and what true humanity, looks like - in the face of intolerable injustice, you respond with compassion, with love, with decency. As an individual and as a country, you are showing the rest of the world how to be better people, and I send you Myroslav, your family, and your country, all of my love. All of Ukraine will be free from occupation once more, I pray it comes soon, and that your essential services, especially getting heating to everyone, are restored quickly. The free world owes you a debt we can never repay. Slava Ukraini!
@@katbairwell your wonderful response with a deep understanding of the situation touched me. Thank you so much ❤
I think sometimes people say "we're all a little ADHD" or similar because they identify with the traits but don't want to "stigmatize" themselves. There can be a pretty toxic trait of living with undiagnosed ADHD and then assuming that you should cope with difficulties and others should too.
I love how professional and informative you are and then you add quick little bits of funniness that don't detract from the subject.
Thanks Jeffrey, I'm glad you're enjoying the videos. 😊
I agree. That de-motivated cat was too real and gave me a chuckle.
I noticed that too! Thx for putting my thoughts into words
unfortunately there are psychologists who believe that ADHD is a “choice”, lack of consequence or moral thinking. that if you gave a person with adhd a million dollars they’d be on time, or they aren’t considering the feelings of their family or coworkers. I even heard these statements from a psychologist with ADHD. the mind boggles
Very true. Huge misconception is that ADHD can be "cured". You can manage it-but it doesn't go away!
The worst part for me is hyperfocusing. I can get sucked in for hours to be sure that all the lines are straight & columns are exactly even. It’s crazy weird! 🤦🏼♀️🙄
That sounds more like OCD than hyperfocusing
Thank you for this. I’ve been prescribed Adderall for 20 years (diagnosed 2003). I’m not a felon, addict, or recreational user. Still, every month I’m subjected to a process that seems designed to make one seem suspicious or drug seeking simply for trying to fill a prescription. It absolutely stigmatizes ADHD as a condition and those who have it.
I hear you. Been in that same boat. Not all of us need to be micromanaged when it comes to getting our refills.
Well sweetie, that's one of the unfortunate by-products of drug addiction. A cross we must bear, if you will. I call people out when they stay whatever snarky thing to me they think it's okay. Pharmacy techs are the worst. I just speak up, and ask why they feel that's okay to say.
But I can't be bullied, but some people can be and that pisses me off. I'll speak up for them too.
@@sockpuppet2415 It is very much different. Limits imposed by insurers, the fact that an increasingly large number of doctors refuse to even prescribe them, and the fact that it requires frequent doctor visits and a prescription are all much more than just showing an ID.
If you haven't had any difficulty obtaining your meds, especially with the worldwide shortage, you must be really advantaged, because every single month the hurdles I have to go through just to get my prescription filled is ridiculous. Finding a doctor willing to prescribe stimulants in the first place took the better part of a year, and then I had to wait months for an appointment. This is itself after over 10 years of trying every other option of treatment. And my insurance won't pay for more than 30mg of Adderall, even though I need 40mg.
This month, after two weeks of trying to get my scrip filled, I finally had a pharmacy that had enough pills for 27 days. The month before was worse. And the month before that, it took 3 weeks to even get a prescription for 2/3 of my normal dose (which I mentioned above is less than I should be taking, anyway).
On top of that, the medication my psychiatrist wants to put me on isn't available as a generic, so my insurance won't pay for it until I have tried literally every other option.
I was diagnosed with ADHD over 10 years ago, and my ADHD symptoms have been adequately treated for approximately 8 months of that time.
I can go to any place in this country that sells liquor, show them my ID, and walk out with as much as I can pay for.
Not even close to the same.
@sock puppet Yes, I understand what you were referring to, but that wasn't what the OP was talking about. It's also not about insurers "denying" a dosage; insurers typically have an established dosage cap--which is all well and good if you're the kind of person whose symptoms are managed at a lower dose. Everyone's physiology is different and there isn't a standard dosage. They also have rules about how frequently you can fill your dosage. I have to wait exactly 30 days since I filled my last one, so if the pharmacy doesn't have it in stock on the day my prescription is sent, then I can't get my meds and I have to do without for however many days it takes until they have them. That's not how it works for any other medication I'm prescribed, and there is no reason that they have to make it this hard to get.
I have not developed a tolerance to my ADHD meds; 40mg is the dose where I first started seeing some help with my symptoms. My insurance simply doesn't cover more than 30mg--and that choice is arbitrary, not based on any valid medical reason.
Skipping meds on weekends is great if you're the kind of person who is capable of functioning without meds on the weekends. I am simply not functional without meds. But that's *entirely irrelevant* because I am already having to skip meds out of necessity, not by choice.
Medication is not a luxury that I use to boost my performance. ADHD is not something that only interferes with my functioning 5 days of the week. It is not something that just makes me absent-minded or kooky. I'm frankly astonished by how many people with ADHD have suggested that I should just suck it up and take fewer meds when what I am prescribed is already not an effective dose and is not available when I need it, anyway. How about those of you who are capable of doing without it stop using it so that those of us who need it for basic functioning can access it? Wait, what, you believe you deserve equitable access to resources? Funny how that works, isn't it, because I also think I should have that access, even if it means I need to take medication every day.
I can't imagine that you actually believed your comment was in any way helpful. Must be nice to have privilege.
@@rebeccabilly7466 I guess my son and I lucked out. We both have ADHD but we are not on Adderall (I heard about the shortage though), my son is on Focalin and I'm on Vyvanse. We were both originally on Adderall but it wasn't for us, hence the switch. We have to see either in person or via telehealth our GPs/PCPs every three months, but I have to call in, for my son, to get refills every month, and for myself, I use a system called My Chart where I can request refills/renewals online.
When I was a kid, they would allow refills without calling, but because people have abused ADHD medications they've made it so no refills are possible without a new scrip each month. Which is just really taxing on people with ADHD. It's always people who don't need these meds making it difficult for the people who do.
I don't know how it would work for you, but it may be worth a shot. Vyvanse is one of the few ADHD medications that can't be free-based, so insurance companies are more apt to give the higher doses because if someone does get their hands on your pills somehow and does something stupid, the medication is inert if free-based, it doesn't do anything at all. You would need 70mg + 20mg of Vyvanse to equate 40mg of Adderall XR or 70mg + 30mg of Vyvanse to equate 40mg of Adderall (non XR). Vyvanse wears down a bit slower too. I would crash on Adderall, when it wore off I would just drop, but with the Vyvanse the come down is gradual, rather than a sudden drop.
Whatever you decide, I hope things work out for the better for you, being without needed medication is the absolute pits... 😰
I wish more people understood ADHD and what it’s like having it. Some days the stimulants work and other days it’s like I didn’t even take it. 🥴
Honestly . I am on 30mg Adderall IR 3X a day and I kid you not , I sleep like a baby , I eat all day , and it’s like taking nothing 🤦🏻♀️
I've noticed it makes me have more of the energy required to do the random unnecessary shit I don't actually need to do. So instead of being productive with important things, I'll hyperfocus on sorting buckets of nuts and bolts for five hours.
Same here.
I wish I knew what causes it! Why is it working on Monday and why not working on Tuesday ??
Or they make it worse
The Adderall and Ritalin shortages are directly because the DEA limited MANUFACTURING due to the unrelated, and misrepresented opioid (meaning illegal fentanyl) "epidemic".
As a person with ADHD on medication, stimulant medication was definitely not a cure, but the effects were life changing. The fact that most people naturally had that type of focus and internal motivation (that My body felt on the medication) was an astounding revelation for me. Also, implementing lots of tools and systems in place to account for my ADHD symptoms like weak time perception, hyper focus, impulsivity, and emotional dysregulation was super key as well.
Exactly 🎉
Medication is amazing
medication was life changing for me too, suddenly the noise in my head settled down and I could see what are priorities and what are not. Today is my 1 year anniversary on Buproprion (Wellbutrin) and I celebrate!
I was just saying that to my doctor this morning. I've spent 39 years of my life suffering and never knew. Mind was blown when I first took adderall.
"Holy shit this is how my brain is supposed to work? !!!!"
I wish there were more Psychiatrists like you.
AMEN! The world gave me endless financial incentives to *not* have invisible mental health disabilities, but that’s irrelevant because contrary to capitalism’s mythologies of meritocracy and individualism - my neurodivergence is not a voluntary character flaw. Nor is accommodating me with psychiatric care and sensory infrastructure a “hand-out” any more than handicapped parking or lifts on busses.
I really appreciate your comments. Have seen you comment on multiple ADHD vids, but esp. this one really resonated with me.
It's funny you mention handicapped actually, bc I keep having to remind my helpers and close ones that I'm not average- you wouldn't tell a "severely" autistic person that everyone feels stressed sometimes, would you?
-- The following became a classic rant lol :D
I know it's a cliche but SOCIETY really makes it freaking hard to function with ADhD, at least for me, after all my negative experiences that have pushed me down and made me afraid etc.
I HATE that I'm envious of hyperactive ADHD ppl bragging about their talents and success. It's infuriating to me and my sensitive moral compass, that only the privileged adhd'ers get to be represented.
I am once again ranting, but I'm so sick of feeling useless as a Mainly Inattentive type, trying to cope with bad Vyvanse side effects at dosage change, while others say Vyvanse instantly helps them calm down their thoughts and focus lol.
I keep doubting myself and getting imposter syndrome bc I'm not a typical adHd boy.
I've always been sensitive and much more cognitively hyper.
Or rather, always hyper too, BUT SUPER SCARED OF PPL! Or bad ppl, that is.
Massive trauma has ruined me, and it's frustrating realizing now after so long, but also comforting.
I'm gettting tested by a neuropsychologist or whtvr next year after waiting for years.
@@Venomonomonom Thanks for sharing! This isn’t a “rant” to me. Two-thousand word thoughts are how I say “good morning” ✊
@TayZonday coming with the absolute truth bombs! Capitalism really does reinforce arbitrary structures which penalize those of us who struggle with neurodivergence. Fortunately I've learned some techniques and exercises that help manage my mind and my life in order to accomplish some good things (well, along with the privileges that I have and a good amount of help from people that I am fortunate to have in my life), but it continues to make me extremely sad to see a LOT of folks like me (who didn't have a lot of privileges and advantages I did) who have been absolutely steamrolled, chewed up, and spit out by our capitalist society, and then stigmatized and shamed by neurotypical folk for not being able to compete at the same level, by the same rules that typical folk are able to navigate with ease (and usually with other privileges at play as well). Just observing this system in itself is enough to make me feel like I'm going absolutely mad on a daily basis sometimes. Bless you sir, and bless you Dr. Marks.
Ooh this is fun. I've never tried taking on a famous TH-camr in a comments section before. First, may I just say that chocolate rain is one of the most amazing pieces of music I've ever heard. Secondly, I do agree that modern society causes a lot of problems. Else, this is where our perspectives diverge.
American Capitalism is too extreme for everyone's own good there. It is weird how they keep insisting on being cruel to the poor in the name of Jesus, and treat Poverty Traps like Commie propaganda even though Investopedia has articles on it.
The problem is, is that if you have a centrally planned economy with the government in charge of the entire economy, it ALWAYS goes unbelievably worse, due to a psychopathic mafia always rising to the top. A Far Left 'General Secretary' is basically an Absolute Monarchy.
Capitalism is in no way without problems, but I'm not quite sure of the last time anyone in the West starved their own people into CANNIBALISM with Stalin's 5-year plans like the Holodomor. If you think putting the government in charge of the entire economy is unquestionably a good idea, I politely suggest you look up the concept of State-Capitalism.
Because that's what China basically is today. There, they have massive water shortages, are paying mortgages on properties that aren't even built yet, and Jinping has just made himself president for life as his cronies STEAL BODILY ORGANS FROM MUSLIMS.
Furthermore, I am sad that so many people hear the word 'socialism' and immediately think of Marx and Lenin. They don't know the real truth about those two.
Karl Marx, was a casually racist anti-semite [Letter to Engels 30th July 1862] homophobe [1869] who cheated on his noble-born wife and had a secret son with his maid. How Trump of him!
Lovely Lenin Man of the people, GASSED PEASANT FARMERS who were revolting against the 'not bourgeois' bolsheviks stealing their food for 'collectivisation' in a time of famine. The Tambov Rebellion. Sounds eerily similar to donald trump having moms against police brutality tear gassed for the imaginary thoughtcrime wrongthink of doing a peaceful protest.
"Russian Communism is the illegitimate lovechild of Karl Marx and Catherine the Great" - Sir Clement Attlee. Post-ww2 Labour Party PM. He was one of a long line of *British* Socialists starting with christian Philanthropist Robert Owen.
Attlee launched the NHS, expanded the welfare state, other reforms and started freeing our formerly, immorally, occupied territories. He was a Social Liberal / Social Democrat, and he did far more good for humanity than Marx, Lenin or the White Russian Supremacist Soviet Empire ever achieved. Mixed economies are healthier, saner and more effective, than either USA Turbo-Capitalism, or the insanity that emerges in the aftermath of every bolshevik revolution.
Change my mind.
@@TheHorseshoePartyUK Welcome to the party, ol' Mr./Ms. Not-the-Point. Being that you're in the UK, you can at least walk into a hospital without worrying about bankrupting your family.
Adderall not only helped with motivation, it improved my anxiety, and helped correct my sleep schedule. I had been diagnosed with depression and anxiety long before my adhd diagnoses, and tried all sorts of anti-depressants but none of it was really working. Finally got diagnosed with adhd and started Adderall, and now i feel like my life is finally moving forward
I have had a similar history to you and have just started Ritalin in the past couple months. It’s early days and still working out dosage etc. but I have to say I do feel a mild blanket of calm about 10-15 mins after I take it, and for a while I feel less anxious. Looking forward to possibly trying a longer acting one or a slight adjustment to the dosage to help with motivation more.
for me it was Buproprion ('wellbutrin') but otherwise: same! Congratulations to us both 🥰
@@chelseagirl30 exactly the right words! "a mild blanket of calm". I take buproprion ('welbutrin') which is only one pill per day. I recommend. I take it in the evening because the stimulant makes me sleepy 😄Finally enough stimulant to calm down? I don't know. As long as it works 👍
Adult ADHD and hyperfocus really needs to be talked about more because it doesn't look the same as it does in kids, and inattentive and hyperactive also have some variations. I loved the money analogy, because I've walked away from great paying jobs and even dream situations due an inability to control my focus. Anyone who thinks that a person would just choose to do that really doesn't get it.
I love this. I hyperfocus on my art and it literally hurts me. People don't understand I don't eat, sleep, or take care of myself because I can't step away from what I'm hyperfocus on. And when I try I can't focus on anything else because my mind is still on my art. It stresses me out and I love the end result of my art but I think it physically hurts to hyperfocus.
Exactly!
I've been learning a new style of painting, and half the nights the last two weeks I've gone to just practice painting one little element... And stayed up until after 3am painting, hunched over in one position, no food, no drinks, my back aches, I've had to go to the bathroom for hours, and i have to be up for work at 7am.
Yes, i love art. But i don't WANT to try to be getting through my work shift on 3.5 hours of sleep night after night. I'm not intentionally choosing that.
Thank you for being perhaps the best YT psychiatrist/mental health worker.
You're not a sell-out as opposed to others, and it does not go unnoticed.
I hope you can realize how incredibly grateful so many ppl are to you.
It takes so little to not only positively affects lives, but also to save them.
For real!! I am so grateful for her and her content
I'm so thankful!
She should be the guest doctor on the news. Dr. Marks would be a great expert when they discuss health issues.
That would never happen because the ones on t.v are pharma paid shills 9 times out of 10. Which is one of the reasons the rich want to censor the internet. Control.
Agreed. I’d love to see her on the Sherri Shepherd show.
I’ll never forget when I was taking a test in the fifth grade, and after being the last one to finish, my teacher, Mrs. Lassiter, walked out into the hallway and said to another teacher, “I thought AIG kids were supposed to be smart.” I didn’t understand the emotion at the time, but I wonder if that’s where some of my anxiety originated. I don’t think a lot of teachers understand that children hear everything
Oh that's so awful to hear. Interestingly enough the teacher that tried to take me out of the advanced classes was 5th grade too. I know teachers have a lot to deal with, but sadly I don't think they get properly trained on how to think about kids with ADHD. So these insensitive comments cut deep at an impressionable time in your life.
@@DrTraceyMarks I'm having to deal with this with my daughters 3rd grade teachers. They are more concerned on how her accommodations may distract other students and less on how they will help her. It's heartbreaking how helpless they make her feel sometimes because she's struggling with a subject and make it seem like it's her fault when they are the teacher here and it's their job to teach her. It's very frustrating for parents out there dealing with the school districts.
@@DrTraceyMarks I agree. Thank you for your reply 💚 I hope you have a happy thanksgiving
Sorry to hear that Richard.
Also parents.
This is so validating! The gaslighting, shaming, and mislabeling I've received in my life has given me a lot of internalized hatred, but also a great sense of humour as a coping mechanism. 🙃
Sorry to hear. I've had a bit rough time of it myself. Recommendations: Dr Tracey of course. Else, PhD Carol Dweck's Growth Mindset for logical self-kindness. Mark Manson for logical self-discipline, sideways takes on things eg his video 'the backwards law'. Uncommon Knowledge UK hosted by Mark Tyrrell, well in my experience that's the best anyone can get, as a substitute for actual therapy.
His video on Inferiority Complex did me a lot of good, as did ones about anxiety. Then, this is a BANGER of a quote by Simon Sinek: "Confidence is believing in yourself. Arrogance is telling other people you're better than they are. Confidence inspires. Arrogance destroys"
Also you're probably onto them by now, but Psych2Go is great if you're a bit short on spoons or time. Just trying to think of one last bit of Philosophy to tie this up with. Hah, that seems apt:
"Who is my master? He who decides what I do or do not like!" - Epictetus. Born into slavery in ancient Rome, he became the most sought-out Philosopher of his time. Good luck!
😊😊l
I was one of the first to be diagnosed, OK, so I will show my age here. I was a junior in high school in 1987. The guidance counselor could not understand why I was flunking out of school because she could see how bright I was. Thank you for explaining this. I get so angry when people don’t understand what I deal with on a daily basis just being me.I’m 53 years old. I have never gotten a handle on it. It has been my biggest curse in life. It has also been a blessing, I wish I could be in the hyperfocus state more often. I cannot wait to watch more of your videos.
It must’ve been so hard back in the 80s and 90s when so much less was understood, not to mention that nobody really talked about any sort of mental illness or neurodivergence openly. Hope things have become easier for you over time. I am 43, and just only now trying Ritalin after a few times being diagnosed adhd in my adult life but now finally doing something about it.
I can read a book and, a few months later, read the same book, and it's almost like reading it for the first time.
The accommodations = advantage one hits hard. I've been stood in front of the class & had a teacher say I get to cheat because I'm stupid.
I would like more support. It's insane the amount of things I've failed at or how much this has cost me in life. I've been told to drop my diagnosis to improve my chances to get into college. After 10+ years at my job I was put on an erratic schedule & been on the verge of being fired. I tried meds, therapy & begging for my schedule back. What has really hurt about this is psychologists & therapists telling me to not disclose at work. They are happy to drug me for the anxiety and depression from failing for so long but a simple schedule change could be life changing. Why is it ok for adhd people to be discriminated against. Why do I have to hide & just look like an irresponsible adult.
Thank you for making this video and for being so articulate in clarifying these things. I have both ADHD and Panic Disorder and I'm so tired of hearing how "everyone" feels like this. If it's an invisible illness - people are cruel regardless of how intelligent they allegedly are. 😞
This video is a teaching tool many employers and school officials should watch (to educate them on the manifestations of ADHD/ADD). For so long I didn't know how to articulate my struggles with ADD, but I'm learning so much from this channel. I honestly want to cry tears of joy because I now understand that my struggles to focus don't mean I'm lazy, or intellectually incapable. Thank you kindly, Dr. Marks for educating the masses.
Can so relate to this. Always knew there was more to my struggles. Work, relationships, school, etc. And yes, the tears flowed 👍
the whole "creating a system that reminds you of the things that are important to other people for the sake of your relationships" is where SO many other adhd people have just decided to ignore and it's super difficult to deal with when I have adhd, and I've put in that effort.
Good on you! I'm guilty as charged, I always ended up discontinuing attempts to keep track of responsibilities after some time, but hopefully with someone in my corner I can be more mindful going forward.
Thank you for this, Dr Marks. One of the most pernicious myths about ADHD I've encountered (as someone diagnosed age 32) is that if you manage to do things like hold down a job, graduate with good grades, etc, you can't have ADHD. In fact, the clinician responsible for diagnosing me challenged me on this very thing! Yes, I graduated with good grades, but so much in life was dysfunctional, it was hell to get through, and I very nearly didn't. 'Success' does not invalidate ADHD!
PS Been medicated for a year and a half and it is life-changing. Most noticeable is the near-total drop in severe depressive and anxious episodes. Turns out, sometimes, that treating ADHD is the first domino that needs to fall. I'd never go back.
And when there is too much visual stimuli, it's extremely difficult to prioritize what to do first.
Medication definitely leveled the playing field for me. I was diagnosed last year and I’ve experienced less or no depression, finally have been consistent in college and working towards my bachelors, and a host of other things. As you said, medication has its drawbacks but they are outweighed by the benefits for me personally.
Also, hearing that stimulants are addictive to people with ADHD is hilarious to me because I have to force myself to take mine. I filled my last 30 day prescription in SEPTEMBER! It’s not a good thing that I don’t take them more consistently, but it’s definitely proof that it’s not inherently addictive for us.
@@JohnsonKayla12 The reptillians feed off fear…masks were a metaphor to shut up about pedos..pedos are the real diease…Make educational mental health videos…🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩..my god you don’t even know what’s going on fool…Look up INDIGO children…we were the first with the message of ADHD and space children…I’ve been on meds for 30 years and you twenty somethings want to be us…well your not…Another one lost souls being scammed.. anyone can
Tell you it’s from the bullshit of covid..3 months between Epstein island and covid you do the math…clog up the courts genius
@@JohnsonKayla12 I agree, I was a drug addict but I work hard so that one day I can come off the medication - I try to take it everyday now as that definitely works best for me, but I love the days when I forget to take it or intentionally don’t take it, because even though the medication I’m now on has barely, if any, side effects and works brilliantly, I still want to learn to live without it and have no withdrawal symptoms when I don’t take it, but when I do, I’m able to function and learn to be consistent with the routines I’m developing. There are lots of myths that can make life harder, until we know ourselves better 😊
I was diagnosed with ADHD at 14. My mom and my sister both have diagnoses as well, so I was taught to embrace it. It’s not a damn superpower. It makes my life hard at times. I have fibromyalgia as well, which compounds the inability to concentrate due to fatigue and pain. But I’ve learned to work with ADHD bc it’s part of me and how I learn and how I think. I found environments that allow me to be who I am bc people have been inviting and accepting and I’ve had limited barriers. I know a lot of people haven’t been fortunate to have that experience. I really struggle without medication, so this last year has been particularly hard with the shortage. I say all of this to say, thank you for sharing this video. I hope the general public learns more about ADHD.
Thank you so much for this. I have bipolar disorder and ADHD and I feel like people, whether in a good or bad way, take the bipolar disorder seriously, but think the ADHD is a joke. Very frustrating. Thank you so much for debunking these. Sometimes it's easy to think down on yourself instead of remembering it's actually a disorder.
So do I. Don’t take Adderall. It does not do well with bipolar. It almost killed me. I went into hypomanic states and did some strange things because of the Adderall and bipolar. Stay away from it. Far far away from it. If you have bipolar research, Viraylar.
You validate my life. Whenever I feel hopelessly broken a video will come along with some ANSWERS. Thank you again ☺️🙏
I'm so glad Barbara! All the best to you. 😊👍🏽
The biggest accommodation that would have helped me in school (my major was English with an emphasis on creative writing) would have been internal deadlines on things like papers - stuff like "get me XYZ words at office hours after our next class meeting and we'll discuss any problems I see and how you can address them on the next meeting." This is something that would feel like absolute hell to a neurotypical person but little bits of feedback strewn throughout the assignment would make it so much easier to do the assignment in a timely way instead of cramming the whole thing in the last 3 days before deadline.
Dr. Tracy i just wanted to say I love when you where your hair out like this! Your curl pattern is gorgeous and i think the shape your hair has frames your face extremely well!
Also really appreciate the video, kind of annoying that I’ve had to defend myself against people who have held all of these misconceptions to be true throughout my life. Keep it up!
I cried through this video. I have a child with ADHD. We’re dealing with so many of these issues. Luckily she attends a school who provides learning services to students with ADHD however, dealing with so-called friends and teachers who do not fully understand the effects of ADHD the myths behind them and lack of empathy, makes this journey so much harder for my kid. Breaks my heart. I wish every day I could trade places with her but I cant. I just stay in a constant mode of support, advocacy, seeking help, managing meds/therapy, being hyper understanding. But also finds myself overcompensating too offset a lot of negativity she deals with. I’m hyper sensitive and ready to ponce like a tiger when she’s being mistreated. It wreaks my heart. Just thinking I might need therapy on how to manage my own emotions around this. Feels like Im suffering to. 😓
Being in therapy yourself sounds like a great idea for you and your child’s sake! It’s a very loving thing to do because it shows her that you take your own well-being seriously and she’ll take that lesson in!
It’s important you get the support for yourself while you teach your child to self -advocate for herself too. No, you can’t stand in for her, but you can help her learn the communication skills and find the people who will be part of her « tribe » who appreciates and « gets her. « We can’t eliminate the difficult people we encounter, but we can help our loved ones to learn to identify trustworthy and respectful friends, colleagues, environments, etc.
Music helps and/or dancing. It's amazingly easy to focus once there's music playing in the background. I can get so much done and not even realize it. Dancing helps dopamine, even boring tasks can be interesting. Don't forget the random distractions. Have lots of hobbies, gadgets, puzzles available for the in between times when nothing seems to work.. and allow the hyperfocus, it gives a sense of accomplishment.
I really appreciate this video. I was recently so saddened by a therapist that I followed on social media that made a video saying people with ADHD needed to take accountability and implied that it wasn’t a real issue that required treatment.
I love your channel. I got my ADHD diagnosis and treatment this year, and now I'm helping my mom get evaluated too. Thank you for these videos, they are seriously so educational!
You're so welcome Long. I'm glad you're getting help. 😊👍🏽
Would you be able to delve into Inattentive ADHD subset, and best practices to conquer it in one of your videos? I absolutely love your presentation of most topics and this one hits close to home as I've taken meds for this for nearly 20 years. Thanks for all the great content!
Thanks for the suggestion Ray. Let me see what I can come up with.
@@DrTraceyMarks I'm sure you know but for everyone else, inattentive has been majorly missed, since all their hyperactivity is in the mind, not running round classrooms and kicking footballs at daddy's new flatscreen etc, and I think Combined is the most commonly known type? I myself have lost much of my hyperactivity and impulsivity in middle age, but my organisational skills are increasingly failing. A curious thing I think might be worth looking into for your profession as whole, is this bit of a knotty problem.
ADHD brains often love the internet for stimulation, yet 'normies' who destroy their minds with too much internet, social media, news, and just, Information Overload in general, show some of the same signs, eg, memory loss, concentration issues. So I think both groups are likely to face misdiagnosis at times? Also one Alzheimers site talks about 'Digital Dementia'.
Nearly none of us can remember our own friend's and family's phone numbers anymore. We usually, remember how to google things rather than the information itself. This is a troubling road for humanity to go down in my opinion.
this is why i literally told myself there is no way i'm adhd im not like him ect... n same for all others in my life. this comment /reply resonates so hard for me as i am currently/recently navigating all of this...
@@katharinemiller6704 If you haven't already check out the channel How to ADHD, that was the one I started watching and all the bells rang and I was like "this is me". I was diagnosed with inattentive type before the summer this year.
@@3lmodfz Hi! I'm a fellow fan of the lovely Jessica and team. She is truly wonderful. I have a tendency to be cynical, and after a messy life, I can see through people on very little information and be correct in my assumptions 9/10 times, but she really is, just pure wholesomeness :)
I did want to leave a second comment that I had previously treated for depression and anxiety separately. I have generally not been a anxious or depressed person and have weaned off of those SSRI medications without thinking about it. Treating for ADHD with stimulant medication has helped with both anxiety and depression, as I am able to understand/regulate my feelings better, feel less self-doubt and hopefully to make better decisions for myself.
I learned that the depression comes from me needing more “me” time because I have a habit of planning too many things in my day for those dopamine kicks hanging out with friends or hooking up. Anxiety has come from not knowing enough about a topic or person - so I just ask more questions and keep conversation “light” until I find something relatable - or it’s because I find the person in talking to to be very attractive.
A lot of my inattentive ADHD/ADD comes from being alone and/or bored and it’s easier for me to manage - instead of fighting or resisting those feelings to force myself to work/focus.
I resonate with this video so much. Everything in this video has been a struggle for me. I've spent so much time watching videos on how to organize, be focused and productivity when in reality I probably should have been reading about ADHD and getting tested. I was put in special classes as a child because I was slow at reading or would "space out." I secretly struggled in school and work. My brother was diagnosed with ADHD and I've always had to work twice as hard in college and in a corporate metric driven environment. In fact I am working now. working so hard just to keep up and function even keeping a clean house is difficult for me. The only thing that drives me is grit and constantly working on myself to create new habits. I mean constant!
As a health literacy specialist, Dr. Marks' provides some of the most easily understood medical descriptions I have seen. Thank you for recognizing the need to share and then actually sharing.
I was a mental health nurse in the UK for many years and I think I just learned today a better language to communicate to and with my younger brother and former guardee about his ongoing struggle with his ADHD, thank you for that I think/hope your videos will help me to help him better.
Can you talk about ADHD and binge eating disorder? 😔
Yes please!
@@panthercat38 If you're snacking / binging on anything with lots of HFCS you're likely making yourself more hungry as it tends to have that effect on people. Else here's a tip I had from a lady that helped me:
Steadily drink water throughout the day. Stop 30 mins before your main meal. Here's the counter-intuitive part: Some people are drinking a pint or a litre of fluid with or straight after a meal, which just flushes their stomach through in some amount.
End result: Hungry, binging. So: Do not drink anything with the meal or at least half an hour after it. It *will* be unpleasant but within 2 weeks you'll be more consistently hydrated, and have stopped this problem in it's tracks.
If it's an actual binge-eating disorder, that is way above my level right now, sorry. Else I think you might benefit from Mark Tyrrell of Uncommon Knowledge UK. The videos that did me the most good were about anxiety, panic, and inferiority complex. Good luck!
and also the oposite,
i have severe ADHD and i can (no its not the meds because this was a problem before hand) forget to eat for a day or two easilly,
i get that we are forgetfull but is it possible to be so forgetful you literally wont maintain basic functions of survival?
This is one of my main problems. I'm on Vyvanse cause it targets your urge to eat.
All the years in school I felt feeling stupid. I always struggled with memorising things when studying. And that made me feel stupid because everyone else could do it and they’d get good grades. I was always behind and it really affect my work and self esteem. I never knew why. Earlier this year I got diagnosed with inattentive type ADHD at the age of 20. Not once occurred to me I might have it until I came across slow processing speed which gave me an answer to what I always struggled with and it related to ADHD!
That’s when I discovered how differently it presents in girls vs boys. I struggle a lot with emotional dysregulation. That’s probably the way ADHD impacts me the most. Then there’s hard to focus, forgetfulness and not being organised part. Being diagnosed made me feel validated and proved to me that I am not stupid.
Thanks for all these educational videos.
i have struggled and felt same, v recently diagnosed the exact same n twice your age, so it happened waywordly as my therapist got to know me better and see/hear all my patterns in weekly life... not sure how to change as i have felt "less than" in my head all these yrs for not remembering things fast or retaining info if not interested...but at least now finally i do feel validation
Me too ,forgetful,hard to focus and very disorganized
I know this is 5 months old but I have to thank you. I have only recently realised I really have ADHD and the symptoms you describe here match mine so closely they made me cry with happiness realising things aren’t my fault, and I’m not weak and lazy. Thank you so much.
This is so relatable. All my life I was told that I was very smart and creative, yet I couldn't turn in homework on time, couldn't hold down a job, just generally couldn't function like "normal" people.
Then once I realized it was the ADHD and Autism, it felt so validating to know that there was a legitimate reason behind it and I wasn't just crazy or lazy or selfish.
THANK YOU, for the information this is what I am going though.
So many years unable to complete assignments
OMG EVERYONE needs to hear this video.
Always say to myself
What is wrong with me?🙏🏽
The thing for books with me...is that books I really liked to read...I could blast through so fast it was insane...but if i'm reading something i really don't like or identify with or are dense like some textbooks...It is SOOO hard to read and comprehend/absorb what i'm reading. I hate it so much. it's making college SOOO hard. I SUCK at 'studying' but i'm great at paying attention to lectures because I LOVE learning new stuff... so classes that are lecture heavy I LOVE. classes that are just "read this then do that" I struggle with SO hard. =/
Your videos are always so validating and this one tops the list! Also, I know you didn't ask for this but I LOVE your hair and I love the different ways you wear it on twists, etc! You are an inspiration!
Thanks SO much QuirkyViper!! I really appreciate that. 🙂
Dr. Marks, I LOVED your "thick hair" example! That really resonated with me (and made me laugh).
Even when I try really hard to pay attention when someone introduces themself, I NEVER remember their name afterward--no matter how important the person or dire the situation. I think I get distracted by the all additional information I process and file away (e.g., thick hair, lol), which I often do frantically just so I can remember that I met that person, but the result is that I just can't retain their name a few seconds after they say it....ever.
Been trying to change that about myself for over 15 years, but after my recent ADHD diagnosis and your insight, maybe I'll start cutting myself some slack...
It's helping if you know someone else with same name and can think about that other person making some brain connection, but tbh I sometimes just saying straight away that sorry but I forgot someone's name if that person is important but haven't talked in a while 😂 if it's someone I talk incidentally I just say "hi" no names, I recognize that I know the person and we talked, maybe even remember 1st letter of a name but unless I have to contact the person for something I don't care, my brain flushes that info as not important, can't do much about it😅, if I like someone I'm also saying I might forget their name so they should not feel offended (although both "I forgot" and "I won't remember" depends if person seem to not get offended by that of course)
I would hear statements from other, "Well if I can remember, you can remember", "If you cared you would remember and not keeping putting it off", "I can create a schedule and keep track of everything. If I can do that, you shouldn't have a problem with that!", "You take too long to think about it, so therefore I am right and you are wrong!". This was before I found out that I had ADHD, but I knew my brain process was different. I felt so frustrated, misunderstood, and sometimes would blame myself. Thanks for making these videos. They are so helpful and really educational.
“We all have adhd” often comes from people with adhd who probably feel like everyone must feel the same way as them. This undiagnosed adhd makes them feel like “I did it with no help, why can’t you, or I feel the same way, and I’m fine” without realizing they fail at executive functioning, too.
I have ruled out adhd in myself for a long time because I was able to read a book from cover to cover and also learned very fast. I now realize that I was only able to do those things because I was hyperfocusing, meanwhile I wasn't eating drinking or going to the bathroom for hours on end
I'm not sure why your channel came up on my feed about ADHD but everything you describe about it resonates with me massively, I cannot for the life of me focus on what I want to do, overthinking everything I want to do but never get it started, I'll sit in front of the computer to do stuff but my mind goes blank after I've organised what I was going to do. It's affected me all my life and I feel I've never been able to achieve what I've wanted to. I feel I've never been able to turn to my GP or turn to anyone for help, I wouldn't even know where to start to get myself assessed or attempted to get diagnosed, I'm a father of an Autistic daughter too and since we've had her I'm more aware of myself and actions even more.
Dr. Tracey Marks, I just want to tell you that I have been following your videos for a long time, I am a therapist (still early in my career) and have learned so much from your content. Thank you for education around mental health and what to do about it. I use your videos to help educate my clients that have found them to be so helpful too! Thank you
My dad could not deal with me when i was younger. Child protective services were called constantly for the abuse i dealt with as a child. I constantly forgot things he told me to do and would call me lazy and stupid. Thank god my mom rescued me. My grades in school were horrendous. I had a fantastic reading level due to my understanding of vocabulary but i had zero retention with anything i ever read. To this day i am 36 years old and have never read a book.
I was a straight A student in a class. One day I took a test and totally blew off all but the first page completely unaware. Fortunately for me that professor detected something was wrong and the next day she took me aside and let me finish the test. Bravo for her. A rare breed at least in my day!
This has been really validating to read and hear.
If my parents would have understood "if you cared you'd remember" and "you could choose to pay attention".... it would've saved me a lot of abuse as a kid. I'm sure many other commenters have similar stories.
Be safe out there ❤
@7:30 spot on. I have ADHD, BPD, and an iQ of 147. Unfortunately I have NEVER been able to get the education I need to obtain decent employment, because of my issues.... It's a vicious cycle.
Hey, could you describe how your ADHD and BPD combo looks like? I got ADHD and thim8i might have BPD as well
That’s so sad to hear
Relate. High IQ, also know enough it's a flawed metric. Also know enough to know that you can actually improve it, but by learning the skills associated with IQ tests, not by doing a bunch until you memorise how they work. Also Cognitive Flexibility, creative thinking problem solver who makes my friends laugh literally all day every day. A new idea for a great project at least once a week. Never start any of them, or get anywhere if I do. My house is a pigsty heading towards Hoarding levels, and I'm pretty 'off' in day to day life.
If by BPD you refer to Borderline, it really can be well treated by DBT. It was quite a shock to find out Dr Marsha Linehan was sectioned for a misdiagnosis of schizophrenia in her youth, got out, got better, got trained, invented DBT, then later in life revealed she's Borderline herself. I'm no expert but it appears she's quite a religious type so for those who aren't her initial approach may need adjustment.
I am quite sick of people with BPD often being regarded as manipulative, when from my time looking into it, it seems the vast majority of them are traumatised, and can get help to make possibly even full recovery, occasionally let their emotions run away with them in ways that *seem* manipulative...but really, no real malice there for the most part. All TARRED by a tiny few malcontents hiding behind a diagnosis that suits them better than Narcissistic Personality Disorder which is what these types really are I believe, though lack evidence for that belief.
This is awesome and I'm in tears feeling like I can't control the dependence. It is the mess. If I have my meds, I'm fine. No meds or fill on day 29 or some carry it and others don't...And all the generic versions are a mess. I keep getting two types are one is yuk. It makes me feel so bad.
Speaking on motivation even when your job is at risk, I went through a period at work when I had a project that was very highly visible to senior leaders and I was responsible for reporting for an entire sector. I was so incredibly unmotivated and I would leave work early to sleep. All of a sudden I went from a top employee to one who was at risk of getting fired. Contrast that to my current role where I’m problem solving and doing design work, and I’m thriving. I still struggle when I run into something not working and it takes longer than expected, it’s hard for me to get motivated to work through those issues. However my overall motivation is so much higher and I’m doing so much better. The whole time I thought I was just depressed, but now finally getting assessed for adhd
This sounds like me, in that I am currently regarded as one of the top employees but worried everyday that I'm going to be "found out" and be risk at being fired. What design work are you doing now?
what worked for you to get the motivation going? I myself cannot get out of bed and it's awful.
My brother was absolutely brilliant. A local attorney, he taught about art, music and even used an old saturday night skit to expain the Iran Contra Affair from many years back. However, in grade school he could not spell. He had a teacher insist he was special needs. He talked of playing scrabble in that class and consistantly beating the teacher. The label followed him through our local public school system. He had to get permission to take a very advanced social studies. He had to get permission to take calculus. Fortunately he never gave up. Made it thru his B.S. with two business majors, made it thru law school and followed his dream into private practice. Yes, he was different from most. But he was ever so kind and compassionate. He never made a lot of $ but was a very good public defender. Sadly, he passed of a heart attack at age 53, four years ago. I still miss him every day. He was my closest human on earth. RIP FMS
#1: Thank you, Dr. Tracey Marks! Yes! It hurt a lot more than I would have liked when I told my aunt recently that my ADHD has made many things very difficult for me, and she returns with "Well, a lot of people have ADHD" (so what's your excuse?). I'm in my late 20's and so when I was diagnosed with "ADD" as a child, it was around this boom idea that this was some new excuse for children's bad behavior and that people just wanted to medicate the children. The stigma that ADHD is just a fake thing to excuse laziness and a lack of will power has been so harmful for my mental health for so long. Even my own mother (we're not even biologically related funnily enough, I'm adopted), age 59, struggles; I can see how difficult life always is for her because of the condition, but she always falls into berating herself, me, and others in our family who have been diagnosed with ADHD. I've been very patiently trying to reinforce that she isn't a failure for the parts of her who can't always keep up with other people. I can see how much it has brought down her self-esteem being seen as a flake and always forgetting things she shouldn't. Even with the treatments in place as of today, it's not enough to alleviate all of the different executive dysfunction going on a daily basis. I can't stress enough that I'm not looking for excuses, only a little patience and understanding for things I can't always do the same as others. It's also difficult because ADHD and autism are both neurodevelopmental disorders, like cousin conditions, but ADHD is always, always seen as like a normal person thing, while autism is more often seen as something to take seriously. ADHD can be just as debilitating, ADHD also has a spectrum of severity. I grew up having to deny that ADHD is a disability at all. When I entered the working world, it was still a bit of a shock to see ADHD listed as a legal disability.
#3: Oh, my god. Yes. That happened at the end of my last relationship "If you really loved me, if you really cared about our future, you would get your life together so we can go forward." Which 100% wasn't true. It was so sad. I did my best, but it's like depression can exacerbate the ADHD symptoms because suddenly -nothing is interesting enough to do-, even if you really want nothing but to suddenly become superman and do all of the things necessary to "get my life together". Plus, things like depression, ptsd, cptsd, can make all of the normal ADHD struggles, like memory, almost insane levels of impossible.
#5: So true, like you mention earlier in the video, some people with adhd might become sometimes borderline genius when it comes to subjects that "stimulate" them, but even me, I was just such an average student in school, I thought I was an idiot. lol
#7: I really need a new psychiatrist. I told my psych, (he's an NP), that I was getting certain side effects from my meds, and that they don't bother me (jitters, staying more focused, muscle pain, higher heart rate, feeling more energetic, feeling more cheerful and jolly, etc.) and he just said "Oh, we don't want those. That's not what it's supposed to do. It's supposed to make you feel calmer." Like Um, I have inattentive ADHD, I DON'T NEED it to make me feel calmer. I'm already a calm person and my anti-depressants weren't doing enough to make me feel more happy, energetic, and productive, why is this a bad thing? I get the potential for heart problems, but I was doing like you mention here, taking breaks every few days for my heart. But that wasn't enough for my NP, he ended up taking me off to see if "it really was" the meds causing my muscle pain. I tried to tell him that when I'm not taking them, the brain fog gets so bad, so, so bad that I'd rather have the muscle pains than to not have the extra kick in my mental ability. But no... It's been weeks off of my adhd meds and I've been so unproductive. Ugh! He's so frustrating because he's always making it out like I'm lazy and not doing what I should to "be an adult". At this point I have no issue leaving and saying "I just don't feel like I'm getting the quality care that I'm looking for anymore". He treats me so disrespectfully in my opinion. I'm so sick of it! He's so pompous and full of himself, I loathe practitioners who don't listen to their patients and always treat them like hypochondriacs. "Well, she's definitely anxious" (He said this to my mom because she also sees him). BS, yes, I'm an anxious person, but not for those reasons. My NP is of the dated belief that "mostly boys have autism", how can I take a person like this seriously??? Like, don't you have to take continuing Ed?? Man, I wish you were my doctor, Dr. Tracey. I much prefer to have a practitioner who actually cares about and is constantly curious to learn more about their field.
Number 5. 👿 Years ago, I had a professor for college algebra who just flat out told me, on the first day of class, that it had "been her experience" that students with accommodations get lower grades and are not as likely to do well in her class. Fairly quickly, I discovered the reason for this being her experience-- she tried repeatedly to deny me the extra time and quiet environment I was entitled to. I was a STRAIGHT A student (and FWIW, I qualify for MENSA and used to be a member). But in her class, I barely managed a C. It ruined my perfect 4.0, and even though I passed, I retook the class for grade forgiveness to regain it and kept that 4.0 through trig, three semesters of calculus, and two more of differential equations.
This video should be required viewing for anyone in a teaching profession.
i got diagnosed recently, and im extremely thankful for this type of content. much love💖💖💖
The How to ADHD channel by Jessica McCabe is your friend! Truly. There may be people with more knowledge out there, possibly, but if so, I doubt they communicate it as well to our ADHD brains!
@@TheHorseshoePartyUK yes i know her channel for a long time, she actually helped me to be diagnosed because i learned a lot about myself from her content😊
@@a_deputy She really is wonderful, I adore her and would wife her in a heartbeat. I've reasons to be wary of people who seem so nice, but she just radiates complete wholesomeness! Not one selfish nor malicious bone in her body!
I’m literally crying right now. As an adult I feel like I was able to overcome a lot of these things I’ve struggled with. I remember in school I was bullied for being big and stupid and I thought that about myself for most of my life until I til my mid 20’s I’m now 32. I own a small business and am a master dog groomer and I teach how to groom too. I also manage a coffee shop and I am a mother to a baby boy. I’m crying because I really never thought to learn anything besides what I was told about my inattentive ADD and I had no idea it effected me in other ways like my emotions or self regulation or even executive function. So I’m here on TH-cam now going down a rabbit hole because my son appears to have many of my same symptoms and I want to do everything I can to enable him to cope better than I did.
I appreciate your help bringing light to the issues I have struggled with my entire life. I can share videos like this to people who don't understand.
Yes, please share and I hope it sheds some needed light. 😊
Ppl think I'm lazy. And I'm a loser. I'm a loner now just me and my family. Just started Strattera I hope finally my ADHD gets better 🙏 God bless everyone. 🙌
Thank you! I'm currently in the process of diagnosis, because literally everything in my behaviour is pointing in the direction of ADHD, but it's so hard to get people to see what I struggle with every day. Even my parents didn't really believe me until they spoke with their pscychologist friend, who knows people with ADHD. And every time someone tells me "oh, I have it sometimes as well, you don't have to label yourself as sick", I just start to feel guilty, that perhaps I really don't have it, and me having a hard time finishing university, remembering things, etc. is just because I'm lazy. I have to remind myself pretty often that no, it's not my fault, don't listen to random people, and by starting the diagnosis process I'm already on the path of getting better.
Videos like this help me a lot. I cannot even express how grateful I am to people like you, who spread awareness of this disorder and debunk the myths around it
The normies are the natural majority that keep things stable. Us more unusual people, we are the natural minority that brings interesting changes due to our sideways perspective on life.
Example: Einstein widely regarded as autistic due to his extremely high intelligence at Physics, yet bumbled his way through his personal relationships.
Richard Branson of Virgin fame, is ADHD and Dyslexic.
Many say Bill Gates is both ADHD and ASD, but no proof yet. Sometimes in footage though, there's hints he might be
As someone who has severe ADD I really love these videos. Everything you're saying is spot on.
That terms gone out of fashion now, so they call it ADHD Inattentive type. Just the whole thing is poorly named and we need something more accurate, and less stigmatising. Someone had a great one and of course, I can't remember it. I like the term "Attention Modulation difficulties and possible Impulsive Hyperactivity" but not exactly snappy. My mate had a great one too. Seems there is some trend of Hyperactivity and Impulsivity tailing off a lot as people get older, at times. Like I got up to LOTS of shenanigans as a teen and young adult, that I've only more recently realised were.... extreme.
These days, too tired to cause trouble. Increasingly disorganised, no diagnosis, no help. Also not sure Stims would be best for me. Great first line treatment for many, but given my experience of partying, they'd be last resort for me.
@@TheHorseshoePartyUK same dude the stims come with some pretty shit side effects for me. Good luck man, all the best.
Thank you so much I relate to everything you spoke about. As an adult diagnosed at 48, with ADD and ADHD. (I was diagnosed with Dyslexia in my late 20's). I really appreciate and resonate with your area of expertise. Even at the ripe old age of 50 I sometimes find that I get sucked into the myths perpetuated by others. Thank you once again I feel I have so much clarity about ADHD 💙💚💜
Thank you so so much for this video. I've always had trouble with my mother and her disconnect in understanding how ADHD affects my entire life, that it's not just "makes me hyper sometimes disorder."
I did 'well' in school (struggled silently and sometimes loudly but wasn't heard) and I graduated on time from college with good grades. My anxiety was barely enough to get me able to submit assignments by a deadline, which is how I was able to survive: not even starting assignments until the night before and being up until 6am writing papers because my brain finally let me when the anxiety threshold was high enough. Looked like procrastination, but really was executive dysfunction.
Anyways, thank you for another informative and easy to understand video! You really are making a difference :)
This gave me a much deeper understanding of ADHD than I've had most of my life. And it helped me also understand that my ongoing struggle to focus due to dissociation, and need to focus extremely intently to perform everyday tasks are interfering substantially with my quality of life. It adds fuel to my fire of tackling my PTSD on all fronts. It's slow going, but I chose this path for reasons I believe in fiercely.
I am 26 and I just stumbled onto your channel. ADHD med side effects are nasty for me and I have been trying to understand how my own brain works and surrounded by family that swears by the "if you cared enough you'd be able to do it" and "you need more effort". Watching your videos (Several others about ADHD) has given me an understanding of myself I didn't posses. Amazing content and I hope others find it as helpful and weight lifting as I did.
Your content on ADHD has been a great help to me when I was explain to my family what am I go through. I was diagnosed as an adult, and my struggles were always takes as laziness and all that comes with it. Now they are open to learning about it, so your videos worked perfect an answer to some of their questions. Thank you
Yep. I'm living with my OAP parents at the moment, and they keep overloading me with too many things I need to do for them. I can't pick one to start. Nothing gets done. So I tell them to prioritise the most important one, and then another one or two to do, and then I'll come back for more later :)
I don't know if i have ADHD or not i just find myself watching these anytime i search symptoms im having. Whether i have it, i dont know, i just know im miserable. Literally everything in my life is being affected by it. I want to see a doctor, but procrastinate because i get anxiety anytime i think about doing that or anytbing for that matter. I cant focus at work, or home. Even hobbies. I start to work on something and 2 seconds in get anxiety and almost forget what im even supposed to be doing. Idk. This comment is all over the place. Thats kind of my life though. Hopefully i figure something out. Im working on it.
I think alot of people with adhd can relate how shit it feels or felt to hear "you're just so lazy" from other people. It really starts chipping away at your confidence the more you hear it
Thanks so much for sharing this! Very validating for me, who was diagnosed at 32 years old after my life had been adversely affected by my ADHD.
Thank you so much for this video, Dr. Marks. You explained things way better than I ever could have. It's hard to live with ADHD, but it's nice to know I'm understood and not alone. 😊
Thanks for these videos, doctor. Most of this resonates with me. I’ve tried talking to close ones about this but have always been told “you’re not hyperactive at all,” “no one wants to do that, you just need to rip off the bandaid, etc.” I’m 44 years old and have never been diagnosed, but maybe this will be enough to get me to start talking to professionals. I feel like people will think I’m just trying to get drugs. This has helped, though, and would explain all sorts of things that affect my work and personal life. Thank you
Have recently been hyperfixating on your channel and videos and it’s been SO validating for me in knowing I’m not “making this up” as so many people tend to think.
I finally sought treatment for my ADHD after I turned 26 (grew up in a household that did not believe in doctors or mental health awareness) and honestly I do sometimes get hung up on “How much more successful could I have been had I been properly treated at a young age?” - but ultimately; I’m glad to have treatment now because at 34 I finally feel like I’m a somewhat capable human in society even though I have limitations within my executive dysfunction.
I’d really love to hear your thoughts or analysis on folks with ADHD who also live with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome.
I am a few months away from turning 40, and I only learned about having ADHD less than a year ago. Your videos have not just explained to me what it is, but have explained almost every difficulty I've experienced in my life. These videos are healing and affirming. Thank you for the work that you do.
I always get distracted by hair, earrings, jewelery or even shapes on peoples faces. I get into all types of tangents with people if I have to pay attention. I never attributed that to my adhd.
YESS distracted by hair. By hair!!🥲 and then by my clothes and shoes or my contacts, then feeling uncomfortable in my sitting position and really any other position too... I've had those things all my life but never even noticed (I have an incredibly hard time taking notice of anything inside but also outside of me). And now I just keep being... stunned/speechless or whatever all the time when I finally realize those things. How in the world did this go undiagnosed until nearly 20 years living like that😶😶
Same. I hyperfocus on the smallest details and miss the big picture.
I appreciate this videos so much. I don’t know how to stop procrastinating a lot of times, and I’m trying not to say negative things to myself
Dr. Tracey, this video was VERY helpful for me. The example of immediately forgetting a name that was just said is a troubling experience that I've had. I feared it was a memory issue independent of the ADHD. Thank you for continuing to do these videos: you provide what we (I at least) cannot otherwise find.
I really wish that you were the Dr my parents took me to as a child. It's scary how accurate you are. Even at 42, I still constantly struggle and it unfortunately does affect those around me and has even just caused the end of my ten year relationship. I have tried to not be this way and tried so many different methods to overcome this, without success. I don't know what to do anymore and constantly feel lost and directionless.
Thank-you for your channel.
I was depressed for years, since middle school all throughout highschool until just last year when I finally got the courage to return to college after a 2 year break. I felt dumb cus I never completed tests, and I rarely did hw. Never studied, so I did bad in the classes I didn't like. My parents were constantly reminding me about how lazy I was, and telling me that I should make myself useful. I always had a terrible self esteem and doubted myself. Still recovering from it. But at least now, knowing that adhd is a thing, and being on 56mg concerta as of recently, I've been able to get things done and not procrastinate as much, focusing a lil more. Feeling more confident
Dr you are amazing ...very clear and easy to understand. I dont usually make it trough the entire video , but im cleaning right now and listening to you with my headphones ,so its much easier for me to listne to the entire video.
I also send these to my wife so she understands.
Thank u
I really appreciate your videos, from the trichotillomania to ADHD, it doesn't make me feel bad for my past actions but validated. This makes sense when it came to school - HATED English/Grammar but loved science/biology, and work - HATED working in bankruptcy but love working in Research (finding problems and fixing them). When I was prescribed Wellbutrin and Adderall, yes, I focused and got work done, but in the beginning, I felt like a zombie, stopped eating as much and then became REALLY snappy at my family.
People online being wrongheaded in their good-intent, often frame stims as being 'not addictive for ADHD brains' which is simply not true. They're a great medication for ADHD, but people do need to be careful with them and treat them with respect.
Eg people I know, well one in USA takes his only during the working week, then avoids them on weekends. That he is capable of doing that with stims, is proof itself that ADHD brains are wired differently imo.
Stims in the hands of normies are some of the most addictive substances in the world.
I literally almost lost my business because I couldn't focus on certain tasks, the tasks that needed to be completed in order for me to get paid, and no amount of money was enough to get me to focus.
When I admitted to struggling with motivation and that it might be due to ADHD, my parents' response was for me to stop being dramatic, put in the work, and "deal with it myself" since I studied Psychology in uni. I'm working now and more overwhelmed than ever despite previous experiences of being burned out of my responsibilities and having to jump through hoops to catch up. I'm going to see a psychologist in a few days to see if she concurs with my hunch, and how I should proceed one way or the other.
Exercise helps too. And vitamin B and C drinks.
how are you now, a few months along? I hope you got a diagnosis and some medication. I got Buproprion and it made such a difference. 'A blanket of calm' another poster said. Finally able to look over everything and notice what are priorities, instead of every grass screaming at you at eye ball height. I also rearranged my view on life and what concists of a useful day and that helped too. And delegating what is a bore to me (or a tyring chore) and shoulder shrug if I do things my way (like not taking a shower every day, not doing social networking via drinks 'n meets and paying someone to do my groceries and cleaning my house.) Hope you are well :)
I don't take stimulants but I definitely relate to being perceived as drug seeking when your prescription is out of stock. I know I'm also just hard on myself for needing medication at all so that situation exacerbates that self judgement.
Wonderful video! W hilariously accurate examples .🤣. 34- I've recently been diagnosed and my dad definitely doesn't believe or understand the struggle I've been dealing w most of my life. Videos like this help me feel heard and understood. 🙏💚
P.s burst out laughing w your forgetful name example. I finally had the courage to be matter of fact and say to ppl " remind me your name again?" Until one person responded " .....jason..you ask me everytime you see me....." 😐😳💀busted. I forgot that I always forgot the poor guys name and frankly face! But he always approached me when I was all over the place in my head.
YOU are AMAZING! I recently came across an ADHD vid. I've seen a few since. I am going to be 55 y/o in Aug. June 14 I go for a 3 hour appt to get a diagnosis for which I believe is ADHD. I can relate almost 100% every time I watch one of your vids. I especially appreciated your examples. Hopefully it will help not only ourselves, but those who care about us.
I love your video’s, they have helped me explain so much to my family and friends, and they are also how I first thought about me having adhd. Thanks so much and I hope you continue to make great videos like the ones you already have.
Thank you so much for all of your amazing content over the years.
I have burst into tears watching several of your videos because I had never felt so seen. I’ve been on and off medication since the sixth grade- sometimes stopping for years in between because I gave into the stigma surrounding adhd medication.
But now at 31 I can say that medication has been a huge benefit for myself. Of course managing the side effects of the medication can be a full time job itself. It’s hard work just remembering to eat, but the benefit outweighs the cost
Thanks Dr Tracey for your great work! You amazingly described this condition!
I just found this video and have had my eyes opened. I've seen a lot of myself in my daughter as she grows up. She was diagnosed as ADHD and has been on medication for a couple years. But this video helped me to understand everything I feel on a daily basis. Maybe I should figure out how I can get diagnosed.
My mother, born in 1945, had it. I have it. Our lives were blighted by our ADHD. We thought we were stupid and worthless. Oddly enough, our ADHD got much worse at puberty. I mean we went from bright students to almost zeros almost overnight. I tried stimulants at 45, but I had a major allergic reaction to all of the brands. At 57, my mind has deteriorated so much that I can no longer work. Any boring task makes me very tired and sleepy in about a minute and I can no longer take intelligent decisions or focus on anything for very long. Thankfully, I was able ro retire. I’m bored, but I won’t volunteer because I am so stupid and slow!
Stupid, how so?
You've taken thought turned it into action and given a precise of some of your experiences. A loving, caring, sacrificial act. I say thank you, but I do not agree you are stupid.
I have learnt from yours and others' comments. I am grateful.
did you try desoxyn?
A friend of mine had bad reactions to all of them and that was given by their dr as a finall go at it and it totally turned the table around for
This is great. I have bipolar two disorder with anxiety and ADHD. I work full time and I struggle every day. I wish everyone would educate themselves on these topics so they can have empathy for others. Thank you for these wonderful videos ❤