GOP Says Covid Is Overhyped | Sheriff In Hot Water Over Pic Of Santa Getting A Gun Permit

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  • @jlrthebassplayer
    @jlrthebassplayer 3 ปีที่แล้ว +273

    I'm sorry, that Sen J not needing protection when he goes and .....s himself! That was hilarious and a monster FU, classic! Great stuff!

  • @SlowmovingGiant
    @SlowmovingGiant 3 ปีที่แล้ว +172

    That was a stellar use of the word "Nimrod" and a kickass "F" Bomb drop.

    • @mariepanimdim4303
      @mariepanimdim4303 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I love loved Jon's reaction to the F bomb!! xoxo

    • @falchion1966
      @falchion1966 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      OOOOH!

    • @farmbrough
      @farmbrough 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      He seems a bit ignorant to me. Why is MTG a Babylonian hunter?

  • @anneoboyle426
    @anneoboyle426 3 ปีที่แล้ว +85

    Stephen is my Hero! Thanks for making living in Wisconsin (under Comrade Ron Johnson) a little bit less painful!

    • @lynntaylor9681
      @lynntaylor9681 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Seconded. It's too bad we can't kick Ron Johnson out of the state.
      There's one football player I wouldn't mind kicking out as well.

    • @an882
      @an882 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Vote the tw@t out!

    • @malavoy1
      @malavoy1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      With the cream cheese shortage due to shipping problems, what are they doing there in Wisconsin, make the cows hold it? 😁😁😁

  • @skyrocketcoast219
    @skyrocketcoast219 3 ปีที่แล้ว +246

    Fantastic show!
    Colbert slam dunk of MTGreene was good. And then the Huge Put down for Idiot fascist Ron Johnson was well warranted!

  • @johnnymurray6275
    @johnnymurray6275 3 ปีที่แล้ว +213

    Colbert is comedic Genius. Telling that GOP senator to not use protection when he "screws" himself!! Brilliant

    • @mihaimoldo
      @mihaimoldo 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Idk when it happened but the daily show got better writers in the last year or so.

    • @SanGeet0510
      @SanGeet0510 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      On the other hand, had there been a mandate to use protection with all screws when AIDS virus became known, there would be no new generations since that time.

    • @raymondkymsuttle
      @raymondkymsuttle 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      His writers are brilliant.

    • @assaqwwq
      @assaqwwq 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      You misspelled "go fuck yourselves"

  • @Tuturial464
    @Tuturial464 3 ปีที่แล้ว +373

    Stephen makes my day feel a lot better. Thanks Stephen

    • @joblessbum7
      @joblessbum7 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      I look forward to his monologue on TH-cam every night

    • @idlehour
      @idlehour 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Stephen King's Misery is a gorgeous Australian film

    • @bernardoheusi6146
      @bernardoheusi6146 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      "you nimrod!"

    • @randomvintagefilm273
      @randomvintagefilm273 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Too bad he is nothing but a phucking propagandist. November is coming soon!

  • @rocketsurgeon11
    @rocketsurgeon11 3 ปีที่แล้ว +332

    Whoever wrote that burn of Sen. Johnson deserves an award because that was absolutely epic!

    • @sleepy_sensei3913
      @sleepy_sensei3913 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Someone give that person an Emmy thanks

    • @brianleslie1632
      @brianleslie1632 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Not just an Emmy, but also a huge raise 😂 🤣

    • @meadorjd
      @meadorjd 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I concur. Whoever wrote that deserves a massive pay bump & their own segment. 👍

    • @jefschobert9765
      @jefschobert9765 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      We don't even go close to Ron Johnson's house when we walk our dogs. He's a known dog strangler.

    • @DarlaVaughan
      @DarlaVaughan 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Jon at 7:01 😂😆

  • @Evehawk87
    @Evehawk87 3 ปีที่แล้ว +759

    It’s extra fun when Stephen is angry and he is not happy with Sen Johnson.

    • @gamepapa1211
      @gamepapa1211 3 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      The best comedy comes from pain, after all.

    • @JohnSmith-hj4mi
      @JohnSmith-hj4mi 3 ปีที่แล้ว +46

      Well, this mad-cow from WI had it coming for a while. What Mr. Colbert did tonight should be done to more of those cartoons, more often, by all thinking people all over the free media.

    • @michaelsalisbury1477
      @michaelsalisbury1477 3 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      With good reason

    • @Youvegotredonyou-BeckyChase
      @Youvegotredonyou-BeckyChase 3 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      I appreciate those more than you know. Being from Wisconsin and having to listen to his BS all the time is unbearable...it really is shocking how much support that man has around here...well...up north anyway!

    • @johndavidwolf4239
      @johndavidwolf4239 3 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      @First Last : The real perverts are watching porn in the internet, not late night television, what are you, stuck in 1998?

  • @teejaydiscombobulated2724
    @teejaydiscombobulated2724 3 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    OH yes. Thank you Stephen Colbert for those wonderful words regarding Johnson. I needed to hear that. Made my day. I hope he hears it loud and clear too! He can most definitely go (censors should have left this one alone) himself. Excellent.

    • @danielbaig6094
      @danielbaig6094 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      If censors hadn't bleeped it, CBS would be subject to major fines. In some ways, we're still a rather Puritan culture.

  • @jessetorres8738
    @jessetorres8738 3 ปีที่แล้ว +238

    Everyone in the United States needs to have about a dozen vaccines before they turn 6 years old, so why is it so many are opposed to the Coronavirus vaccine/mandates yet they are alright with the 1s for Smallpox, Polio, Chickenpox, and Measles just to name a few? Furthermore, vaccine mandates are older then the United States itself since George Washington required all of his troops in the Continental Army to get vaccinated and still to this day the military requires all of the troops to get vaccinated to serve, so this idea that the government shouldn't require vaccinate mandates is wrong since they've been doing it forever and it's pretty much the patriotic thing to do.

    • @Isaiah42069
      @Isaiah42069 3 ปีที่แล้ว +68

      yea, tell that to some lunatic fox viewer and you get an endless supply of "what-about-isms" . its fucking insane. trying to reason with someone who wont get the vaxx is like trying to reason with my grandmother. and she has dementia.

    • @christinacascadilla4473
      @christinacascadilla4473 3 ปีที่แล้ว +47

      It’s because this country has gone crazy.

    • @jaquanpowell4605
      @jaquanpowell4605 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Kids who don't have immune systems vs Adults who have choices or at least we had one.

    • @harmonic5107
      @harmonic5107 3 ปีที่แล้ว +50

      @@jaquanpowell4605 kids definitely have immune systems. That would be what the vaccines are for. To train their immune systems.
      And adults who act like children. I agree, we shouldn't have to have a mandate. Unfortunately, people apparently are incredibly stupid.

    • @gamepapa1211
      @gamepapa1211 3 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      Paraphrasing a certain psychotic clown who is NOT T***p: it's not about the vaccine, it's about sending a message. Half of the U.S. population are willing to endanger themselves and others with a global pandemic just to "own the libs."

  • @1Onigun
    @1Onigun 3 ปีที่แล้ว +186

    My uncle Raised me, and he died from AIDS, thank you Stephen Colbert, for saying exactly what was on my mind!

    • @pandorafox3944
      @pandorafox3944 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Same 💗

    • @1Onigun
      @1Onigun 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@pandorafox3944 May your family rest in peace

    • @pandorafox3944
      @pandorafox3944 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@1Onigun Same to you. It such a scary time. And now it's considered a chronic disease! People are living healthy, productive lives. Thank goodness.

    • @1Onigun
      @1Onigun 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@pandorafox3944 If my uncle only could’ve held on for a few more years he still be alive I know exactly how you feel

    • @04beni04
      @04beni04 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      We've recently started making DIY HIV kits available where I live. I'm incredibly proud of the hard work of our local AIDS Network and I'm happy to support them when I can, but I really _really_ wish my uncle (honorary, but I didn't know that growing up) and my stepfather's son both lived to see it happen. As far as I'm concerned, politicians who can brush off the loss of so many good people who deserve better can rot in hell. I wish I could have been in the audience so Stephen could hear my cheering in person.
      I'm sorry for your loss, and I'm sorry that it's so easy for some people to shrug off the pain of those of us left behind.

  • @RusTsea196T
    @RusTsea196T 3 ปีที่แล้ว +114

    Sen. Ron Johnson, you had that coming, sir!
    (Way to go, Stephen!)

    • @nicolebrown1927
      @nicolebrown1927 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I'm hoping there's more to come.😏

    • @ericminch
      @ericminch 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Correction: "asshat" is not spelled s-i-r.

    • @amyreynolds3619
      @amyreynolds3619 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      And that is why I LOVE Stephen Colbert! I see another Emmy in Stephen Colbert's future.

  • @MartaWomack
    @MartaWomack 3 ปีที่แล้ว +607

    I like when Stephen makes politics sound absurd. It takes the edge off of the reality of just how corrupt and evil the political world has actually become. Great job!

    • @CrymsynMoon
      @CrymsynMoon 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      "Making politics sound absurd", also known as anytime anyone talks about politics.

    • @hareeshkrishnaa5642
      @hareeshkrishnaa5642 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Yeah

    • @grimsvaultstreaming3956
      @grimsvaultstreaming3956 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      but hes part of the lefts corrupt cvult so

    • @Timithydwolf
      @Timithydwolf 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      As an NPA I have noticed it on both sides. But the most abundantly corrupt is the Republicans. Democrats seems to be getting overwhelmed with people who actually want to do good for the country and not whoever pays them more.

    • @grimsvaultstreaming3956
      @grimsvaultstreaming3956 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Timithydwolf lol so wrong its not even funny do some research kid you will learn how fake everything they do is

  • @adancer3592
    @adancer3592 3 ปีที่แล้ว +100

    We have lost 4 family members that have died from covid . I almost died myself . So when I need advice from anti-vax covid deniers I'll let them know

    • @kasondaleigh
      @kasondaleigh 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      My tears are for you today.

    • @danielbaig6094
      @danielbaig6094 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Condolences on your losses. Hopefully you yourself have recovered without any of the Long Covid problems.

    • @robertmarmaduke9721
      @robertmarmaduke9721 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      We have lost nobody of 4 family members and only one was Jabbed. The others got through it and are NATURALLY COVID IMMUNE. After tomorrow, only the one will have a job, because of Biden's Vaccine Apartheid against NATURALLY IMMUNE.

    • @elegantgypsyrose5328
      @elegantgypsyrose5328 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@robertmarmaduke9721 no one is COVID immune. Even if you got it and recovered. Vaccinated people are more resistant and if they do get it, don't get as sick. There is an eye doctor here in our city who currently has it for the 3rd time. Anti-vax idiot. Meanwhile he's infected over 200 people who have infected many others who have infected many, many others.

    • @papabear2515
      @papabear2515 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I’m so sorry for your loss, sadly compounded by the insulting insensitivity of anti-vazer trump supporting people who don’t care who dies or how many die.

  • @000001willy
    @000001willy 3 ปีที่แล้ว +503

    That was one of Stephen's best monologues in a long time.

    • @najhoant
      @najhoant 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Dated jokes about anime fans aside

    • @DovahKoenig
      @DovahKoenig 3 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      @@najhoant found the anime fan.

    • @bethaniejify
      @bethaniejify 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Agreed.

    • @erik365365365
      @erik365365365 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Ruthless

    • @Panama_Red
      @Panama_Red 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@najhoant learn to laugh at yourself

  • @samppawest
    @samppawest 3 ปีที่แล้ว +46

    This came out about 6:30 am in Finland, so my morning coffee shot from my nose on my phone on the ”don’t need protection when going F himself” joke. 🤣🤣

    • @robertmarmaduke9721
      @robertmarmaduke9721 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Unless you wear a moon-suit or at least use a shower-curtain with a hole cut in it, it's interesting that Fauci has never addressed SEX. Yet 100,000,000s of people, including Leftist Vaxxed Super Spreaders, are having sex all the time without social distancing or even using prophylactics. The Cult of the Clean of Jab Jesus Koolaid drinkers.

    • @gaypatterson4446
      @gaypatterson4446 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      😂😂😂

    • @andreah9587
      @andreah9587 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@robertmarmaduke9721 what the absolute fuck are you taking about? Can’t tell if this jibberish is fueled by drugs, mental illness, or both.

    • @robertmarmaduke9721
      @robertmarmaduke9721 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@andreah9587 apparently you didn't live through foutch's little AIDS epidemic in the 1980s where they were daily announcements on TV about wearing rubbers and not touching people and if you stood next to someone with AIDS you would get the AIDS yourself. So it was immediately obvious to me that covid wasn't all that deadly if the CDC and NIH are not issuing urgent warnings against having sex without a moon suit. You cannot possibly have sex from 6 ft separation wearing a mask. At least unless it's with yourself. Maybe that's why you can't understand the comment.

    • @samppawest
      @samppawest 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@andreah9587 Do not engage the right in any kind of social media. They take it as validaton and are desperate for it, so they can cling on to some hope that their opinions are as relevant as facts or humanism. Or ’the liberal agenda’ as they call facts and humanism.

  • @x5775
    @x5775 3 ปีที่แล้ว +63

    It doesn't get much funnier than this! Thanks, Stephen!

    • @roni6215
      @roni6215 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It would be funny if it wasn't so horrifyingly terrifying !

  • @mschvs
    @mschvs 3 ปีที่แล้ว +181

    Anyone else notice that Senator Johnson went on his “Fauci overhyped AIDS!” tirade…on the literal *World AIDS Day* (December 1st)?

    • @intomnia3313
      @intomnia3313 3 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      Tone deaf? Stone deaf to reality.

    • @Wordavee1
      @Wordavee1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Well spotted!!

    • @shortsatire5669
      @shortsatire5669 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      RoJo is an embarrassment to decent Wisconsinites.

    • @Auguur
      @Auguur 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      They seem to love stuffing their mouths full of foot

    • @JasonBoyce
      @JasonBoyce 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      i'm sure it was done on purpose. the GOP hates gay people, well, anyone who doesn't vote for them

  • @HaliousX
    @HaliousX 3 ปีที่แล้ว +62

    This was an exceptionally great monologue

  • @charlottegray6882
    @charlottegray6882 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    This is pure comic genius. Intelligent, on point, and deeply funny. Is there a new writer in the house? This was truly special. And, of course, Colbert’s performance is spotless!

  • @geetikaa2874
    @geetikaa2874 3 ปีที่แล้ว +82

    Everyday my love and respect for this man increase manifolds

    • @ke9082
      @ke9082 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Manifolds? Lol 😂 tenfold is the expression but go off.

    • @pityparty9955
      @pityparty9955 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      And his writers

    • @MercenaryMuse
      @MercenaryMuse 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      How mamy varieties if respect and love do you have?

  • @Panama_Red
    @Panama_Red 3 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    That was possibly the best use of a curse word in a joke I've ever heard.

  • @samwingender
    @samwingender 3 ปีที่แล้ว +90

    Be safe out there, everyone.

    • @rachelgallagher6214
      @rachelgallagher6214 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      ✌❤ from Montana

    • @melindamartinez6463
      @melindamartinez6463 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Same to you and your family. Happy Holidays

    • @cybercat29
      @cybercat29 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      The same to you, your dear family, and dear friends from Burnaby, British Columbia, Canada 🇨🇦❤

    • @mammyaondiciple3570
      @mammyaondiciple3570 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Some people apparently refuse

    • @michaelmccluskey1155
      @michaelmccluskey1155 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Same to you and yours from MO.

  • @andreapregnolato5650
    @andreapregnolato5650 3 ปีที่แล้ว +49

    We laughed so hard here in Italy at that guy with the fake arm. Didn't know it was internationally famous though.
    We laughed less when we discovered he wasn't a random weirdo, but a dentist :/

    • @michaelccozens
      @michaelccozens 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I really hope he lost what patients he may have had over that. When someone's carving your face-bones with a high-powered drill, you should probably be concerned about, amongst other things, their judgement.

    • @bodacioustness5054
      @bodacioustness5054 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      I have a hard time here in America laughing at impressions of Italians.

    • @andreapregnolato5650
      @andreapregnolato5650 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@bodacioustness5054 why?

    • @bodacioustness5054
      @bodacioustness5054 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@andreapregnolato5650 Has to do with growing up here being made fun of.

  • @ellasmommy9278
    @ellasmommy9278 3 ปีที่แล้ว +52

    That burn on Ron Johnson was EPIC

  • @thewatchmanstudios6257
    @thewatchmanstudios6257 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Re the Senator Johnson joke.. Beautifully done sir. Please don't apologize for it

  • @Lilo-A
    @Lilo-A 3 ปีที่แล้ว +250

    Hmm, I’d think “took every precaution” would NOT include getting on a cruise ship in the middle of a pandemic, but that’s just me. 😒

    • @JBond-zf4dj
      @JBond-zf4dj 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@ML0694 that's what got me too, lol.

    • @victoriabaker4400
      @victoriabaker4400 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      People who are used to taking cruises every year are pretty much addicted. I don't have any desire to go on one, yet they are/were mega-business.

    • @bessmahaneypilates8638
      @bessmahaneypilates8638 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@victoriabaker4400 my best friend is a huge cruise fan. I’m trying to convince her to NOT go! She’s going on a river cruise in Tennessee instead 😅

    • @CloudsGirl7
      @CloudsGirl7 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Exactly! Man, the gene pool needs a purge.

    • @elegantgypsyrose5328
      @elegantgypsyrose5328 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@CloudsGirl7 Actually I think the Gene Pool needs a Lifeguard.

  • @janetseidlitz5976
    @janetseidlitz5976 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you Stephen, for telling Johnson where to put his!

  • @vash121086
    @vash121086 3 ปีที่แล้ว +72

    That was a good smack down on Ron. Oh he got burned.

  • @stormchasingirl1133
    @stormchasingirl1133 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    I’m from Wisconsin and I’m embarrassed by Ron Johnson. The stupidity in this state is astounding.

  • @rosslynstandingwater4994
    @rosslynstandingwater4994 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Stephen bringing that fire tonight!!🔥🔥

  • @ellibethg711
    @ellibethg711 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Awesome show as usual, but i love it when he drops the f bomb, def needed for that senator, made my night

  • @TheTuubster
    @TheTuubster 3 ปีที่แล้ว +100

    If you lack the competence and intelligence to solve a problem: Deny that the problem exists and use psychological and physical violence to force others to comply to that fantasy.

    • @michaelmccluskey1155
      @michaelmccluskey1155 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Don’t go away mad……

    • @SeansModelBuilds
      @SeansModelBuilds 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      My step-brother's attempted tactic against me. Too bad he's banned from Facebook now.

    • @jessragan6714
      @jessragan6714 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Eventually you reach a point where it's easier and cheaper to just fix the problem than pretend it's not there. I'm not sure we're there yet, though.

    • @ricktherockandroller
      @ricktherockandroller 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @Lynn Geek the age old "I'm rubber and your glue" defense. Good job Einstein.

  • @Panama_Red
    @Panama_Red 3 ปีที่แล้ว +109

    Santa with a gun just confirms what I've always known: he's a violent home intruder.

  • @joemartinez1587
    @joemartinez1587 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Excellent on comment to Ron Johnson!!

  • @spacelemur7955
    @spacelemur7955 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    I will never understand the rush to flock back to crowded venues: cruise ships, sports arenas, and other unnecessary events. This is not the Greatest Generation 2.0.

  • @5749MiMi
    @5749MiMi 3 ปีที่แล้ว +122

    Anybody remember the Diamond Princess sitting on the dock in Japan? A cruise ship is a petrie dish for covid.

    • @chuckoneill2023
      @chuckoneill2023 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      The passengers were forced to remain on that vessel, by the Japanese government, instead of being given proper medical treatment.

    • @melindamartinez6463
      @melindamartinez6463 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      @@chuckoneill2023 Trump did the same thing. He figured that as long as they stayed out on the ship then the covid numbers wouldnt go up.

    • @luvmyrecords
      @luvmyrecords 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yes. Those of us who had worked for Princess in the past got in touch, and we all offered to send basic supplies that they had trouble getting.

    • @nugboy420
      @nugboy420 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Sittin at a dock in Japan,
      Wasting tiiiiiiiimmmmeee

    • @breadyegg
      @breadyegg 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@nugboy420 I can't do what ten people tell me to do, so I guess I'll remain the same

  • @NKA23
    @NKA23 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    Over here in Germany triage of intensive care patients has begun, for the first time outside of times of war. Yeah, totally overhyped..../facepalm

    • @faithlesshound5621
      @faithlesshound5621 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      "Triage" is only a new concept to politicians. Every emergency doctor has to decide who to see to first. The guy who stubbed his toe has to wait till the one with heart attack is dealt with, even if he was first through the door.

    • @chrisobrien238
      @chrisobrien238 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      What about now still crazy yeah ?

  • @christopheroconnor7659
    @christopheroconnor7659 3 ปีที่แล้ว +73

    I actually physically clapped behind my iPad re: Johnson. Excellent.

    • @peggywoods4327
      @peggywoods4327 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I laughed so hard the dogs barked!

    • @kpoonwah
      @kpoonwah 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I did too! 😂

  • @tiffnohelee
    @tiffnohelee 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    Colbert at his best. The man is a comedic genius.

  • @TheAbuSufyaan
    @TheAbuSufyaan 3 ปีที่แล้ว +43

    I reckon we can confidently say if cancer were to ever become contagious we'd be shutting the f*** down

    • @Wordavee1
      @Wordavee1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Cancer is contagious, you catch it in the cigarette store!!!

    • @brandonm949
      @brandonm949 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @@Wordavee1 Which is why we put big warnings on cigarette cartons, make them extra expensive, and ban smoking in crowded public areas.
      Despite what MTG says, we already take cancer seriously.

    • @CloudsGirl7
      @CloudsGirl7 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Yeah, but you KNOW the same people against the precautionary measures of this pandemic (anti-mask, anti-vaccine, unwilling to social distance or only go out for necessities, etc) would still be as uncooperative as they are now. Because, you know, selflessness is out of fashion.

    • @kristyb0027
      @kristyb0027 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Not to mention that we DO try to minimize risks of people getting cancer.
      MTG is an embarrassment

  • @coldwynn
    @coldwynn 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    The comedians just might save the country so long as their humor translates to action.

  • @cycoklr
    @cycoklr 3 ปีที่แล้ว +61

    Once again, the Neanderthal Queen (MTG) displays her level of intellect.

    • @JKennedy442
      @JKennedy442 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I don’t get it don’t these folks have a team of people that can proof read their tweets before they send them??

    • @neogenzim1995
      @neogenzim1995 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      let's not denigrate our neanderthal ancestors.
      let's agree whatever genes birthed abominations like MTG came about though inbreeding.

    • @Mona-Riel
      @Mona-Riel 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@neogenzim1995 well DAAA M😜😹

    • @hsoloman
      @hsoloman 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@JKennedy442 they're not stupid. They know exactly what to say to appeal to their base.

    • @GryphinHusky
      @GryphinHusky 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I was sitting here going "is the Neanderthal Queen a card in MTG? And what does that have to do with this monologue??" and then I realized you meant Greene. I forgot she existed for a minute, and for that minute I was happy.

  • @tatianagochez-kerr5185
    @tatianagochez-kerr5185 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    "Just get a f****** muffin!" Stephen, that is the most New York I have ever heard you sound!! 🤣🤣

  • @TheGohanSkywalker
    @TheGohanSkywalker 3 ปีที่แล้ว +199

    Come on, Stephen, not all of us anime fans have Sailor Moon body pillows.
    Some of us have Goku ones.

    • @stoodmuffinpersonal3144
      @stoodmuffinpersonal3144 3 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      And some have both

    • @eddiejoewalt7746
      @eddiejoewalt7746 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      JOKES LIKE THAT ARE BEING MADE BY BOOMERS WRITERS!

    • @sanakris22
      @sanakris22 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@eddiejoewalt7746 yeah I didn’t find that funny.

    • @lynntaylor9681
      @lynntaylor9681 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Some have neither like myself. I wouldn't mind a Usopp body pillow though.

    • @darkstorminc
      @darkstorminc 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I would prefer Albedo myself.

  • @11cabadger
    @11cabadger 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    So many different facets of Stephen tonight: Righteous Stephen, Potty-Mouth Stephen, MEL-Subscriber Stephen, Sexy Dad Stephen, etc. And a big THANK YOU for the advice to Marjorie and the Johnson. Wish the WI Qpublicans would listen & believe 🥺

  • @PhillyFrank1
    @PhillyFrank1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +45

    C'mon, Stephen, you know better than to refer to right-wing lunatics like Marjorie Taylor Greene as "conservatives." "Nimrod" is right enough, though. Ron Johnson's comment about AIDS is just completely deranged from reality.

    • @JasonBoyce
      @JasonBoyce 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Yeah apparently 750,000 dead Americans is "overhyped". The GOP seriously does not care about American lives

    • @virginiatyree6705
      @virginiatyree6705 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@JasonBoyce , Didn't you mean the GQP? v

  • @tmitz73
    @tmitz73 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Keep after them Stephen!!!! Tell it like it is......You're the best!!!

  • @bruiz5240
    @bruiz5240 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    Stephen is on 🔥 tonight👏👏👏👍

  • @slyasleep
    @slyasleep 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I knew they‘d be having a field day with the Italian fake arm man.

  • @teonnaweakfall1606
    @teonnaweakfall1606 3 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    Stephen is on a roll. And I like it 😁.

  • @MariaBareiss
    @MariaBareiss 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Anyone else love Jon Batiste's reaction to Stephen's callout of Johnson? That was perfection!

  • @laurawatters914
    @laurawatters914 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I LOVE THIS MAN!!! HILARIOUS 😆 I'm so glad it's Monday!! 😊💓✌️

  • @gilbertoborrero2014
    @gilbertoborrero2014 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    There's nothing like a well deserved 'F' Bomb. Proper use of words are important. Kuddos, Mr. Colbert. Kuddos. 🤙

  • @marshmallowdiptaco
    @marshmallowdiptaco 3 ปีที่แล้ว +42

    Oof, that Johnson burn was a burn to the johnson

  • @missholliekay
    @missholliekay 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you so much for giving me a hearty laugh before bed.

  • @MaggieMorrissey1916
    @MaggieMorrissey1916 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Love the booing. Warms my heart. Little bit of faith in humanity restored.

  • @warweezil2802
    @warweezil2802 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Loving this from the UK despite many of the topics not being so relevant here, damn we need a guy like this to roast our politicians daily.

    • @danielanson3882
      @danielanson3882 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I think it would’ve been Mr Oliver, but it appears we’ve stolen him away.

  • @SageScypher
    @SageScypher 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Ey leave my innocent body pillow out of this!🤣

  • @thatsamore8869
    @thatsamore8869 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Outstanding Mr. Colbert!

  • @Br0nto5aurus
    @Br0nto5aurus 3 ปีที่แล้ว +183

    The QFC next to where I work locks up their baby formula. Imagine managing a store owned by a company that grosses $120 billion/year, finding out there are babies in your community who are so hungry their parents resort to stealing, and going "aaaawwww no, those babies can starve". They don't lock up their wine, but a $15 tub of infant formula, that has to be kept under lock and key? It's disgusting.

    • @faroteur96
      @faroteur96 3 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      Welcome to Capitalism...

    • @cloudwatcher608
      @cloudwatcher608 3 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      It’s very common for stores to at least have extra security cameras around the formula aisle. My wife has breast fed all of our babies, which I am so thankful for; it’s definitely not easy for her, but it’s free, healthy, and reliable. I know some women can’t breast feed or choose not to for whatever reason, and they should be able to get formula no matter their socioeconomic situation.

    • @rabidsamfan
      @rabidsamfan 3 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      Baby formula also gets used to cut drugs. That’s why it is a high theft item, even when there isn’t a shortage.

    • @blackened144
      @blackened144 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@rabidsamfan Ive known some people that spend all their food stamps on it, then return it at other stores for cash refund or store credit to buy things like alcohol or cigs.

    • @nodensbertilak6855
      @nodensbertilak6855 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@rabidsamfan lol, you watch too many movies

  • @jamesschutte3338
    @jamesschutte3338 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The Ron Johnson joke! Please, please, please: More of that!

  • @cynthiakozikowski1765
    @cynthiakozikowski1765 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Beautiful comment by Stephen about Russian Ron. That cracked me up

  • @Charles-vd3vc
    @Charles-vd3vc 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    The more people who are not vaccinated, gives more opportunities for more aggressive, resistant, and deadly variants to emerge.

  • @anro7137
    @anro7137 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Stephen was on fire tonight! Well done!

  • @deanaderrick3474
    @deanaderrick3474 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Again for the millionth time, THANK YOU for saying the exact things that we all want to scream, particularly re this recent HIV comment. Thank you.

  • @lw3269
    @lw3269 3 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    Reminder, Sen Ron Johnson was part of a group of senators who visited Putin in Russia on Independence Day 2017

    • @xmiller7691
      @xmiller7691 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      The Republican Treason Caucus and its obedient media servants, like NPR and The Hill, is trying to paint this treachery against their own country as some sort of patriotic act. Their claim that they went there to deliver a " warning" to Vlad is just laughable on its face when it is plainly obvious they went there to get advice from Putin in planning the best way to carry out an insurrection against Congress to destroy democracy in the US.

    • @lw3269
      @lw3269 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@xmiller7691 100% correct, except you got the media stations wrong. Right wing crap like Fox, OAN, and Newsmax are the problem.
      NPR is a legit news station.

    • @danielbaig6094
      @danielbaig6094 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Always good to bring that up -- it was 2018, though.

    • @lw3269
      @lw3269 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@danielbaig6094 True that. My mistake.

  • @DirkDwipple
    @DirkDwipple 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    You had me at F Senator Johnson.

  • @templarknight456
    @templarknight456 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Marjorie is a great example to me. She helps me realize that I'm not a complete idiot like I think I am.

  • @b42indep43
    @b42indep43 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I am ashamed to say that Johnson is one of my two Senators but... Stephen's suggestion is wonderful.

  • @johanmontoya610
    @johanmontoya610 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I LOL'd more than the usual amount with this episode :-D

  • @jameswall007
    @jameswall007 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    06:54 The art of scarcity, produces bold strokes when needed. Excellent use of your very-seldom profanity. 👍👍

  • @cone4302
    @cone4302 3 ปีที่แล้ว +206

    People used to joke that purging Republicans are a legitimate form of self-defense. Sadly Its not a joke anymore :(

    • @gamepapa1211
      @gamepapa1211 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      That's only true if they're the only ones dying. With the way Covid works, these GQP cultists are all ironically turning themselves into suicide bombers.

    • @brainstorm623
      @brainstorm623 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Yeah, there's a lot of things that were once a joke but isn't anymore. Like the idea of Trump being president, or the idea that 2020 being the year of the rat meant there was gonna be another plague.

    • @bluecanine3374
      @bluecanine3374 3 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      @@brainstorm623 that we could have a president less eloquent than George W Bush. God, remember when he was mocked for sounding like an idiot in his statements? Boy how the bar lowered.

    • @paulcronin3626
      @paulcronin3626 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @First Last for a simple person.

    • @jacobalexander9001
      @jacobalexander9001 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Democrats party was founded by kkk members and would hunt down Republicans because the party was mainly African Americans. Democrats wanted African Americans to be slaves and always feel oppressed. Republican party wanted everyone to be treated equal etc.

  • @Coff1Up
    @Coff1Up 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you, Stephen, for that perfectly worded (as always) comment to Senator Johnson.

  • @timetodestination9538
    @timetodestination9538 3 ปีที่แล้ว +273

    "People go to animate fest convention have friends?"
    Ouch, that hurts...

    • @kirstbielle
      @kirstbielle 3 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      "people who go to Anime Convention have friends?!"
      I don't watch anime but I have a bunch of friends that do and I felt that lol

    • @johnnymurray6275
      @johnnymurray6275 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      That' was an Excellent burn coming from a fellow scfi nerd like Colbo😃

    • @justinhackbarth8147
      @justinhackbarth8147 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Yeah, this joke stung.

    • @WT.....
      @WT..... 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      As a massive anime fan, was really surprised to see Stephen knew more brutal truths about the community than the Repubs and their 'research' combined.

    • @DiscoFang
      @DiscoFang 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      What makes this comment funny is that Animates is a pet store chain where I live.

  • @angelaa3732
    @angelaa3732 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I live in Germany, where the restrictions are much more rigorous, and I am totally happy with that!! I am happy that at least NY is doing something to protect people who want to be protected, and have taken measures to do so...

  • @lesbethtacioni1733
    @lesbethtacioni1733 3 ปีที่แล้ว +46

    The "YEAH" guy in the audience is living his best life

    • @Crazdor
      @Crazdor 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      YEAH!!

    • @phriedokra6158
      @phriedokra6158 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Best Cmas Parade EVER!!!

  • @Shieldmaiden313
    @Shieldmaiden313 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Wouldn't be surprised if my neighbor calls the cops on me cuz I just scream "OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH BUUUUURRRRRNNNNNN" With that Sen Johnson BURN!!!!

  • @reubenmood3890
    @reubenmood3890 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    One of Steven's best monologues!! So f-ing funny!

  • @warrenbrophy
    @warrenbrophy 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    That was one of my favorite ever GFYs!!!! Well done!

  • @geoffreygarsson9275
    @geoffreygarsson9275 3 ปีที่แล้ว +100

    Is it me or is Steven having a BBQ? Because he's roasting a lot of of people who brought their small hot dogs.

    • @gamepapa1211
      @gamepapa1211 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      That was chef's kiss perfection!

    • @Adyen11234
      @Adyen11234 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      ooof. That fire for the AIDS thing was just perfect.

    • @357CLOUDY
      @357CLOUDY 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      🤣😂

    • @krejados1
      @krejados1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Small, unprotected hot dogs.

  • @annb4013
    @annb4013 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Stephen! Stephen! Stephen! Loving you so hard about Ron and his Johnson right now!, 😂❤️🥰😎

  • @Zenologia4673
    @Zenologia4673 3 ปีที่แล้ว +277

    “People who go to anime conventions have friends?”
    I feel attacked.

    • @jembozaba4864
      @jembozaba4864 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Same here.

    • @Mike__B
      @Mike__B 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Not just friends... 15 of them!

    • @tomfrazier1103
      @tomfrazier1103 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      As you are meant to feel.

    • @sleepy_sensei3913
      @sleepy_sensei3913 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I KNOW. SAME

    • @nivedita8103
      @nivedita8103 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@tomfrazier1103 why tho?

  • @irishgirllyDR
    @irishgirllyDR 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Be thankful he isn't your senator. Hoping we only have to live with that schmoe until next year.

  • @markmullaney2136
    @markmullaney2136 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Jesus, Lord... I love this Guy!

  • @perpetualgrimace
    @perpetualgrimace 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    "People that go to anime convention have friends?"
    Ouch, that hurts...
    ...from laughing too much at it 😂

  • @nathan_illustration3616
    @nathan_illustration3616 3 ปีที่แล้ว +46

    I now wish to have Stephen voice Mario in the new up coming movie.

    • @DaPrez
      @DaPrez 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @George Morenstein 🤡

    • @CloudsGirl7
      @CloudsGirl7 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      .
      . .
      . . .
      ...there's going to be a MOVIE? And Nintendo hasn't shot it down? I sincerely hope you're joking. (Maybe I'm reading too much into a TH-cam comment...)

  • @Babette1986
    @Babette1986 3 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    I swear to god. Any republican that thinks covid isnt real, wants to spread misinformation about a major health issue, or thinks it's over hyped, I think you should automatically be enlisted to work 12 hour shifts in a hospital under water with these very I'll patients. Just imagine them having to deal with the mental anguish front health care teams go thru when they loose a patient due to a preventable illness

    • @Bob0sModelFabWorx
      @Bob0sModelFabWorx 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I wouldn't want ANY republican any where near my family if my family had to rely on a republican for their life!
      NO republican has the mentaluty to understand simple aspects so I don't think they'll understand how a death can effect someone.

    • @nolanarts
      @nolanarts 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      its not a party line issue. People are thing for themselves more. Instead of "That's the way it is" mentality towards our government local, states, federal. Woke culture push forced a true awakening of truths a morals in the human race. If your still believe political parties actually matter outside of news media and career politicians you need to interact with real people in real life. America is great dont take sides.

    • @nolanarts
      @nolanarts 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Bob0sModelFabWorx what about libertarians or independence? Ask yourself...
      Who told you to think like that? How would you even know what a republican looks like unless you ask any party affiliation ?

    • @nolanarts
      @nolanarts 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Bob0sModelFabWorx its your fear of death it sounds like if im being honest in my observation

    • @krejados1
      @krejados1 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      No, better yet: send them abroad to serve on a Doctors Without Borders or Reporters Without Borders team. Let them see what the world is really like under purely reactive conditions.

  • @KingOfMadCows
    @KingOfMadCows 3 ปีที่แล้ว +54

    If Omicron came from an anime convention then we have to be careful because that's not even its final form. Luckily, there will be about 10 months of filler while it powers up.

    • @gamepapa1211
      @gamepapa1211 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I understood that reference.

    • @davecassin7002
      @davecassin7002 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Dragon ball z style

    • @CitanulsPumpkin
      @CitanulsPumpkin 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Nah. Omicron strikes me as a one punch man fanboi. It'll strike fast out of nowhere, be devastating, and then we'll still have 20 minutes of show with the characters walking around talking at each other about their hopes and dreams while Pi, Rho, and Sigma gear up to hit us in the first 2 minutes of the next episode.

    • @danielbaig6094
      @danielbaig6094 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Also, presumably, we'll be able to tell the infected because their hair will get extra spiky, and lightning will crackle around them. And those with the Omi-Shonen-cron variant will be prone to proclaiming that they CAN'T give up because they're going to save EVERYBODY! (While they say this, they will be spitting out enough blood to put out a small campfire.)

  • @CloudsGirl7
    @CloudsGirl7 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    "Well, if aids was overhyped, Senator Johnson, then I guess you don't have to wear protection when you go [bleep] yourself."
    Stars above, what a slam! 👏😆 Beautiful.

    • @robertmarmaduke9721
      @robertmarmaduke9721 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      $565 BILLION down the rathole of Anthony Fauci and he's STILL pretending AIDS vaxx is just around the corner. That's enough government waste to support at least 2,418,560 orphans from Biden's 14042 No Jab No Job Apartheid Pogrom.

  • @GoGreen1977
    @GoGreen1977 3 ปีที่แล้ว +84

    That sheriff and Santa are just like the Crumbleys. "It's Christmas! Let's go get a gun!"

    • @normalmanhumanguy1
      @normalmanhumanguy1 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      At least Santa is following the Law

    • @emilyfeagin2673
      @emilyfeagin2673 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I want a flame throwing drone. Sadly they are on back order like everything else

    • @bhackaa
      @bhackaa 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Maybe he will save some kid's life when a nutjob comes in killing random people at a mall like they do on a regular basis.

  • @tuckerzenski7828
    @tuckerzenski7828 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    You and your writers killed this show. You haven't nailed it this hard in the monologue for a while. Thanx bud...

  • @DrCinnabon
    @DrCinnabon 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    Steven you've gone too far. Leave my body pillows/friends out of this!

  • @diedertspijkerboer
    @diedertspijkerboer 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I wonder what went on in the head of that person who expected to get away with a fake arm. Very little?

  • @LisaLisa001
    @LisaLisa001 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    What? We have left over f-bombs we can still use on the show in 2021? Done.

  • @tatianagochez-kerr5185
    @tatianagochez-kerr5185 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Excellent excellent excellent:
    "Because it's not contagious you nimrod!
    It's like comparing apples to CANCER!"

  • @3rdeye7thdimension
    @3rdeye7thdimension 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    That was a twenty five second applause. You know what part.

  • @iirgendsonTyp
    @iirgendsonTyp 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    This Show should be a 60 Minute Monologue

  • @ROZDAB
    @ROZDAB 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    We are Pathetic that this pandemic is going to go on longer then one from a hundred years ago.

  • @krokodyl1927
    @krokodyl1927 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    LOL, Stephen was exceptionally (dangerously) funny tonight!! I nearly aspirated the food I was eating, a couple of times!! 😆😂🤣