@@user-bf3yh6ue7p making art for others is something i struggled with heavily. In the point of view that I needed to prove myself and prove that art was worth making.
I am so glad this ended on my page. I’ve been drawing for over 10 years. And I feel the same way about my art as you do: it feels like I want to want to create art. I remember when I was a kid I would have so much fun drawing anime characters or creating my own OCs. Then I was trying to make stories for them. These days it feels like I am chasing something, except I don’t know what. I want to be better at art, but why? To get more commissions? To get more followers? It makes me so sad because I rarely enjoy what I do and I tend to hate my art a lot now, even though it is so much better technically than what I did as a kid. But back then art was about fun… I hope we both can find that fun again,
Yoooooooo i had the exact (or atleast a very similar) problem. I think it is simply that the "desire to create" fundamentally on a human perspective sense is that you want to create value which is currently "lacking". Look at his story. He felt something was "lacking" from the ending of attack on titan and he simply burned with the fire of using his own emotional blueprint, his own values, likes and dislikes to make them a reality. Then with the years of studying for that goal he lost sight of this simple premise. Im not saying that he should make the attack on titan ending. Maybe he even did. It is about not letting your learning process and improvement become your biggest connection to art. I recently realised that for me personally it simply was a lack of confidence and a need to please others. Please others with my skills, with my abillitys, how impressive the things i do where etc etc. I was never allowing myself to digg truely deep because first i wanted to learn more, more, more. "Just mastering one more concept and then i will start creating what i truely want". A need to proof my worth essentially. The external functionality, the comparisons and the learning became a self feeding machine with got facillitated by the use of social media which robbed me day for day of my enjoyment for art. So how did i crawl back out ? For me it was going back to synchronizing myself with the "lack" in my life. What are the fantasy/value worlds i wanted to create ? What are my true inspirations and not just other artists skills which are impressive and therefore i need to compare myself to them ? I got swept up by the learning, studying, comparing etc etc... If you dont get in touch with what really drives you you simply become an analyst. A machine of fundamentals, understanding and production always chasing the next higher skill level to "provide" with your abillitys. But for what ? For which lack ? What do you REALLY like ? Is it really necessary to gather all these skills and all these aspects if they are in the end only shallow skills which do not even help you achieving what you truely want ? For me the solution was to beeing more discriminatory towards my medium intake. Do i really like these things or am i simply studying these because they are technically impressive and i need to feel save in my abillitys to reproduce ? Was i getting blind to my own emotional resonance ? Allow yourself to start creating what you want. Allow yourself taking your time and feeling out which "lack" which "void" you want to fill with your art. From the most heart shattering painting which flips the human condition on his head in a profound way or simply wanting to draw cute cats. It is all valid and in essence the key to happiness and fulfillment in art. Now for something less abstact and more applicable: Write down your ideas, sort them by value (what they mean to you, what you like, what you dont like) without thinking about EXTERNAL validation. Then execute the selected idea and learn for that. Let your desire to express your own internal blueprint become your reason for improvement. Nothing else. This methode keeps you project and value oriented and does not disconnect your learning from your end goal. This is however fucking scarry. Now you are on. Now the game has started. You are creating now what you truely desire. What you truely want. No more studys, comissions, half baked studys for others or all that jazz. When this stuff looks shit it feels like it is all on you. No more:" Ah thats just a study, im just training, short sketch, WIP hell". No ! Finished, polished art which reflects what you want. What you are. The pressure is on. To fail these drawings which truely mean something to you will feel a billion times more stressfull then studying 1000 books about art fundamentals. But this will keep you happy. Your goal will become once again your driver. This was and is the way for me to reconnect with art. I dont know your struggles exactly and maybe im missing the mark here by a thousand mile but i think it does not hurt to share these insights. Have a nice day and happy drawin :D !
@@flux1940Wow, thank you! I’m sure you absolutely nailed it for a lot of us. Especially when sharing art on social media it’s so easy to get into the trap „doing what others might like“. Loose ones own path … again, thank you!
That last comment about making art "not because you want to want to make art, but just doing it", resonated with me a lot. I was an art student fresh out of college and took a gap year because my family and I were moving countries. I loved art. I loved the drawing, the perfection, the idea process and I loved the art block. But I stopped drawing. Life got to me and I completely stopped doing what I loved. Every 6 months I would end up doing one art peice before going back to emptiness and I never knew why. No practices, nothing. But even though I'd move countries often, I would ALWAYS bring my empty sketchbook, with my best pencils. And when I'd move again, I'd take that exact empty book and move once more. Why? Why carry it when you're not even using it? Is it hope? That childlike happiness when you hear the pencil scrape and slide against the paper? I'm not sure. But I love it. Today, I prepped my paper. I outlined a border :D For me, this is a milestone. I always think, rather than to jsut do. It's been eating and eating at my life in other aspects, but. Even having that happiness in what I could do brings joy in knowing that I absolutely can. I jsut shouldn't ever look back. To keep looking at life in the long run, because worrying about it now is getting me nowhere. Thank you for the video, it really helped :)
P.s. I'm always afraid of making mistakes. I mentioned I liked the perfection, but that is a lie. Nothing is and I've jsut accepted it. The prefect is in the impurities of an art piece, which is why I get excited because inherently, there's always meaning in the pieces. That bring me solitude
@@Rose-luna23 SamdoesArt said something similar in his recent video about why he hates his art (lately). He was overly focused on accurately depicting every part of the subject that he was drawing, which ended up creating very rigid pieces that lacked character. I think striving for perfection in art can lead to a lot of negative emotions if you walk the path for too long.
I am a computer engineer. I completely gave up on doing art professionally. I just couldn't see me loving it as a job, with the stress of staying relevant, to be an entrepreneur and market yourself constantly. I also never wanted success or fame. Only dream was to make something that people would discuss a lot. Not me, but my art. And I can totally do that without doing art fulltime. It just takes more time.
The bit about bringing along an empty sketchbook resonates with me so hard. I did the exact same thing whenever I would travel, for so many years. Eventually, I just stopped because it would take up precious luggage space. But recently, I've gotten the spark back, even if it's just a fraction of what I felt when I was a teenager. I've drawn more this year than I have in the past 6. I think I'll bring my sketchbook with me on my next trip. :)
Not me clicking this video to learn as much about art as I can, only to discovered why I’ve been demotivated and irritated by making my art and now idk what to do next because I’m so burnt out and stuck 😔 lmao
Jezz… stop clicking art videos then, you feel bad cause you keep comparing yourself with others. Come back to these videos in 2 years after you’ve got plenty of practice
As a nonfunctional member of society, I also draw 6 hours a day, desperately trying to get better. I’m going on this same journey and have come across a lot of the same things. I’ve finally started just drawing or painting something if I got the thought in my head to do it, rather than thinking I’m not ready for it, and have to do more studies first. I started learning art because I love it. Then, it became a necessity-the only job I could or would pursue. Now, recently, I just love it again. I fell in love with the challenge of improvement and the simple act of being able to draw whatever I have in my head, regardless of my skill level. This is such a great video. I’ve also been losing my mind for the last two years, and probably longer if I’m being honest. But my obsession with art practically keeps me alive. I can’t wait to see more from you, good luck!
Man it’s good to see I’m not the only one losing my mind in this process😂. I’m 33 and decided I was going to dedicate my life to art 11 months ago. It is definitely a roller coaster. Like you I’m in love with the feeling of improving. I’m really hard on myself and sometimes focus too much on the technical side of things but now I’m trying to improve with subjects that have meaning to me. Just wanted to say we’re here together🫶🏼
Bro the ending... When you talk about your art journey long enough, it ends up being a therapy session. Loved this video. I loved the part about finding value in authenticity and passion. It's a rare thing. I hope you get your mind back bro, unlike Edvard Munch.
the autism part killed me ahaha it's so relatable. Thank you for keeping that last part. I started watching this because I stopped drawing for about 2 years, and I thought it would be a good thing to come back to the basics and study a little bit until I get the will to draw something for myself again, but I ended up gaining insight on my art block too. Reality sucks, man. I wanna go back but don't want to give up being a so-called productive member of society
“i want to make art that captures the love for beautiful things” love this sentiment. and nothing you did was garbage. don’t be hard on yourself. this video did a lot to inspire me. ty
damn @22:24 ..."copies are good for learning but when you only do those you forget, you can do more than just a copy. You lose the confidence." been doing so many portrait paintings of reference photos that what i thought ive been chasing the satisfaction was not because i made it, is because i was able to paint it exactly the same as the picture, which is also discouraging at the same time cuz its not something that screams authenticity. Kind of reminds me of how my mother would always say everytime i show her my "art", "why would I need to look at your art if i could just look at a picture?" hurts a lot because it is true. "The discipline of an artist is not to push through when its not fun but rather to find ways to make it fun" I will forever remember that, thank you for making this video. You reminded me of how much I love art in the beginning because it was fun, it made me happy.
Im so inspired by this video. i think your brushwork and composition and lighting are gorgeous, but im rooting for you to find passion again!!! i can't tell you how long ive felt the same way you have, i wish you the best
ive been drawing since i was a kid and im still not the best at any of the fundamentals. im nowhere near as technically skilled as i want to be, but this video helped me feel better about just enjoying the process. i really love it
The part about getting the correct feedback is so true! As someone who went to an art college, teachers can make you hate art and the feedback they give you is often destructive- both to your art and to your mental health. Love your outlook on the learning process!
Holy shit I love this video so much, the words “wanting to want to do art” have been my life for the past year. It’s difficult wanting to be better, seeing how far your art needs to grow, and wanting to grow it for the things you want to create. But by the time you’ve gotten there you’ve forgotten how and why you wanted to make those things, how to make something real. Sometimes I get glimpses of passion and a want to work but it’s hard, everything about art is fleeting and impossible to capture twice. Anyway yeah this just resonated with me a lot, thank you for making an honest video about how your art journey has gone, I don’t think I’ve ever heard another artist be so candid about they’re experience
That's relatable. I used to try to imitate what other bigger artists did, going for the same subjects and style as them and that made me so miserable I felt myself slipping into an art block in my first year learning how to draw seriously. It actually took me a day doodling fun little character from imagination like when I was a kid to start to like to draw again. And time and time again I realize how import it is to draw what you love, what you think is fun or interesting. You have to find a fine balance between doing what you really want and doing studies because if you get stuck only drawing stuff you are not interested or boring studies oh boy, there's no fast way to kill your will to make art.
I feel this! I have a problem where I compare myself to others and think “What should I draw that other people will like?” And try to do all this planning and everything, and nothing really comes out on the page. Yet when I just sit in front of my sketchbook with no plans except my pencil, eraser and a podcast, I am able to create work I am so genuinely proud of and love. And those are always the works of art I get told look the best too!
I really like how much time you took pointing out that fun/passion has to be the backbone of art making and sacrificing that for anything is a sure way to lose interest/burn out.
i'm insanely insanely impressed with your progress. usually i just listen to youtube videos on the background but i sat and watched this the whole way through, eyes glued - the changes were gradual, but also stark enough that if i looked away for a minute i'd audibly go 'holy shit' when i glanced back. on the point of passion, one thing that caught my eye was at 28:40 - the metal/chains are SO well-rendered, but you're talking about how you were doing portraits and not really loving it. it’s so clear where your passion actually was! reminded me of earlier in the video when you mentioned that wanting to learn to render swords/armor was a huge breakthrough point for your improvement, and how chasing that passion led you to understand lighting so much better. it all tied into your point about burnout, which i thought was a great thesis of this vid youtube is an art form, but one you're clearly also very good at!!! amazing vid overall, got a sub from me 🫶
Thank you for sharing your experience. I had mental problems when I was a teenager. So I tried to drawing everything what’s around me, and not focusing what’s inside me. And I realized how is beautiful world around me. To understand yourself you have to look around. Art is language, and good to know it well. And it’s not about technique. Contemporary art is the key. Sorry for my English
Man, 32:49 could easily belong in an illustrated version of Game of Thrones. The jump in quality after you started drawing skulls and learning proportions+perspective+anatomy is actually crazy. The expression some of your pieces have is insane too, kudos for that. Loved the video, it was very real. I've been drawing for about a month now and i'm just focusing on all the face fundamentals (currently reading Loomis's book) and it's painful lmao. I've never been an artistic person so the motivation for me is the challenge itself, but it's a brutal rite of passage everyone has to go through to create meaningful pieces. This video gave me hope to endure it, otherwise i'm not going to make art that feels authentic to me. Thanks again.
This video made me cry man especially at the end...I relate a lot to what you've said and it's quite similar to my own art journey. Just subbed, I like slower paced videos like this because it's a lot easier to digest tbh, anyways I wish you luck on your journey moving forward!!
27:48 Because you see all errors that you don't catch the past few years. It's mean that you improve a lot and understand what you need to focus on next. Art is marathon, not a sprint. And you make great improvement in just 3 years. Keep it !
Thank you so much for this video, it felt like a hug from someone whose been through struggles and wishes the best for others. I hope you will be able to find the passion you once had again and know that time is in your hands
this video felt like a warm hug, ive been struggling a lot and just,,, ❤❤❤ (side note i feel called out hahah, i used to draw so so much every day every week)
I am a traditional painter, and I can tell you, you can learn values separately from colour. It works like layers on photoshop. First paint gray scale painting, wait it to dry completely, and the glaze it with transparent colours layer by layer letting each one to fully dry. It is a old masters technique of oil painting and it is being used for hundreds of years.
Man you spoke of nothing but facts. I am in the exact same spot as you. I've been drawing faces my whole life and I am pretty good at capturing accuracy. People mostly praise my works because of the faces I draw. I am fucking terrified of drawing without a reference. It's like walking in the darkness and trying to find your way forward. Since I've started using them I improved a lot but also completely forgot a lot of things. My mind goes completely blank. And it shows in my drawings too. I've been drawing since primary school and now I am about to leave college. And I was stuck in practice cycle for years. I never used colour or ink. I told myself I am not good enough to finish anything and was just grinding portraits and some "fundamentals". But you have to actually finish things to be good at well, finishing things. I am finally trying to use colour this year and even though it looks terrible I am having fun. You've improved a lot in these few years and I hope you find joy in drawing again. Thank you for this video
Lesson learned, the "nerdy loser" in us have had all the answers all along. But really, I have also struggled with learning to actually enjoy making art again. it reminds me of a saying I heard that cracking an egg from the outside is destructive but Cracking the shell from the inside is creation. I don't remember it in detail but I think that with this making art for external resons to get better, to make a living and follow trends is more destructive whilst internal reasons like doing it cause you feel like it and are passionate, or you want to make a better ending for a show you like, those types of resons are nurturing your art in a good way.
Thank you for adding the ending. It resonates with me. And as you siad poplecznicy really care when soul put into it (unlike ai art), that last 3 minutes felt like deep from your heart
And it so true about caring social media, analysing other, stilling their strategies, caring about the views and likes. I wonder how the people who draw the stories for years, how they kept being emerged into the characters and plot, that might be insane focus. I wish you to get back to you initially desired path!
thank you so much for leaving in the part at the end. i’ve also been struggling a lot with making ‘real’ art, stuff that is genuinely inspired and meaningful. you touched on something i’ve been exactly feeling and it really eats away at me. i look at a lot of your stuff and really see something in it, so it reminds me i’m not just broken. it sounds dramatic but sometimes when i can make something technically decent which people compliment, but emotionally/conceptually dull, it feels like there is a real block inside me. it’s like i don’t know something which all these other great artists know. that’s not true though, because great artists make stuff about what they care about or feel, and i am definitely capable of caring and feeling. anyway, it’s just good to know other people making art go through this - and that the most important thing is to keep making out of enjoyment, not just to be objectively successful because that is what makes it dull.
Dude just keep drawing and dont worry if its the right thing or not. As artists we go through phases. Phases of passion, analysis and recovery. You went through a MAJOORRRR phase of passion. Sounds like you're either in a phase of analysis or strongly fighting a recovery phase. I got out of art school last may and although i still make stuff ive given myself a lot of time to recoup after 4 years of making art 20-40 hours a week. A phase of analysis is okay, its alright to focus on fundamentals like a student and maybe not constantly work on passion projects, itll help you in the long run. I think youre doing a good job and a lot of people are seeing valur in your recent work.
As someone who has been drawing for like 10+ years now, you're doing fine. You've made a lot of progress in just 3 years, your painting are beautiful. It's okay to hit a plateau in your progress, it happens a lot. In fact you'll encounter them many times in your art journey, not all your progress is going to be straight up sometimes you gotta go sideways if that makes sense. Take these times to think about things you want to do with your art and the things you already like about your art. It's good that you're diversifying your mediums, digital art can do a lot but there's a lot to learn using pen and paper. Good luck with your art journey, you're gonna be ok 👍
this is just insanely inspirational, the way i gasped at your improvement! it honestly makes me reflect on my own journey and the fact that i really could’ve been doing more for myself in the year that ive been learning… forcing myself to sit down and do studies made me unmotivated to draw, drawing to post on social media had the same effect, i had cool ideas for projects and illustrations but i was holding myself back because i didn’t feel good enough to do them. but this video brought a bit of light back into my life and i think you should keep up the great work! i also rarely comment on things.. but this video really left a mark for me thankyouu🙌
This video really spoke to me. As a fellow person with autism on her sixth year of art block, I've been beating myself up about how much I could have improved by now if I was drawing consistently. The fact that you improved so much in only 3 years is mind-blowing. The most I ever drew was when I would roleplay with my friends in middle school, creating silly OCs with intertwining stories. Now, I have to force myself to draw and it doesn't come naturally anymore. Your video has inspired me to keep trying to find new ways to make it fun. I was never happier than when I was regularly drawing.
I resonate so hard with this. I used to draw so much when I was younger and obsessed with the characters I had in my head, but now I just feel so much frustration when I force myself to find a reference and draw it, I do it because I want my art to look better and more accurate, but it sucks all of the fun out of it. Its hard to get back into the groove of just creating art that you love and not worrying so much about the technicality of it
Take a look at Araki's story, the author of Jojo's, hes very very analaytical and flips between working on passions and working on the fundamentals and foundational aspects, even if it wasnt exactly what he wanted to think about.
This is one of the realest fucking videos I've ever seen, I greatly admire the vulnerability displayed near the end. Nothing but love and respect and you've given some great insight, rooting for you man
this is the best video i have ever seen in my entire life. thank you so much. i was falling into a death spiral hating my art and losing my goal, this brought me back to where im supposed to be
Thank you for this beautiful and honest video. I myself have been making art on and off for years (not professionally) and I have struggles similar to yours when it comes to "am I enjoying what I'm doing?" "why am I doing it?" "where's my fascination with art that was there when I just started?" - it's still there but it changed a lot. Your video made me think about what to do next. I haven't been drawing from imagination for years. I've been doing a lot of plein air (I'm into landscapes) and I feel like while I'm learning a lot from plein air its still copying, only from nature and not from a photo. So where am I in this? Sorry for the long comment, I just want to thank you for making me think and I wish you a lot of luck and I hope you find yourself again with your new skills in art. In fact I know you will.
I genuinely had to stop posting my art on social media in order to love it again. When i make something im proud of and then put it up on some website where a stranger is going to basically look at it for half a second and move on, i start suddenly feeling very insecure about something that originally made me feel excited and happy. Honsetly, if you want to make money iff of your art, you are going to have to put up with tough competition, poor treatment, and burn out. Some people can handle it and others cant. If you simply want to enjoy your art, forget about the audience entirely.
This video really got a hit on me. Your testimony is quite similar to what I'm living and thinking about pursue... Except I am about two years before you! Maybe you won't find this comment, but just now that you probably changed the way I thought about art. Will keep your video saved for when I need to watch it again. Don't give up! I hope you find your true way again, and don't you dare go hollow!
kind of eerie how similar our journey is. ive kinda went through all the same stages lol, I started in august 2021, grinded like 8 hours a day. except I instead focused on spending all 8 hours on 1 drawing lol. then in like 2022 I started focusing fundamentals and then 2023 I feel I created my best work of art and cant seem to top it or get that magic back on any other paintings. and just recently started posting to youtube. still trying to figure out where my journey leads me here though.
those flowers at 33:22 are gorgeous 😭 also i love your leyendecker(?)-esque ones. the gorgeous pastoral flower fields and timeless clothing and delicate hair. i hope you find your way again and truly draw from imagination! i majored in graphic design due to overlap with hobbies and graduated; took some illustration courses. in terms of technical skill, i was good especially with references, but i had zero imagination. none whatsoever. and i had zero interest in my hobbies in the last years of school. it's back now that i don't work in that field. imagination is a gift. draw what you love.
This was more entertaining, inspiring and helpfull than i thought when i clicked on it. I just wanted to have something on in the background while eating, now my food is cold. Thank you for making this video and talking so openly about your struggles and how you overcame them. Maybe i need to start painting again *-*
I appreciate it that you shared this video, and improving in art requires discipline more than any other factors. As an artist still learning the fundamentals, I relate to you. I have experienced art block, and doubted my creativity. I beleive that to do creative art, you should learn the fundamentals and apply them. I agree that storytelling requires thinking skills, but so is applying the fundamental knowledge. Instead of dwelling in thinking about your lost passion, try recreating the stories by applying your knowledge. Maybe take a break for a while and get back to drawing. Your mental well-being is important too. You did a great job with the fundamentals, and I wish you good luck in your journey. Hope this helps! :)
This video is so real i love the end bit. Im self taught and just doing art as a hobby (ive only been drawing people for like 2 years) so i at first was really jealous of how you were actually studying and talking to a mentor and generally had a rigorous approach bc i just draw fictional characters i really like and occasionally watch yt videos if i want to learn something specific. While i draw around five hours a day and ive improved a ton in faces, anatomy, poses, clothes/folds, and just started not hating my digital work (im mostly a traditional artist but its my goal to be equal in both), but i dont have the discipline to really study things like backgrounds, objects, the technicalities of lighting/rendering, and perspective, and you inspired me to branch out! But more than inspiring me in studying and stuff, youve inspired me to make a story that i love because it can push me out of my comfort zone while making me actually WANT to do so. Thanks for being real and youll get through this rough patch and find something-maybe another story of your own-that inspires you as well ❤(edit: i just saw you made a part 2 and you’re already planning out a story thats awesome!!!)
I started in 2021 aswell. Looking back at my art I really see progress and it's very inspiring. I understand wanting to want to make art, as a person who recently got a job in the games industry, making characters, I'm afraid of loosing the spark bc of all the corporate "that's not possible" bullshit. I just want to make good art, fun characters, sometimes I forget that and it feels impossible to even start. You're a real one for leaving the last part of the video in.
Dear Frej… you have saved a lot of people from taking the route from need to want, pulling the ego away from the pits of hell 😂 to the path of simplicity… that may sound stupid but I think you’ve touched soooo many hearts with your testimony……. Touched my heart … my 3 month all new to ever picking up a pencil and drawing… I love it … I don’t know why I love art all of a sudden but in this moment, I do and I can’t thank you enough for showing me that beautiful hill ahead, that I think I would have started running up it and begun to hate the feeling of that internal strain… instead of taking in the view the joy the inspiration and passion, beauty.. … I want to be good/ really good at drawing/painting… and I know how to burn myself out… thank you for saving me 😂❤❤❤
The ending of that video I feel is so real- reaching a point in art where you’re consumed by the idea of being an artist that you lose focus of the “drawing because I wanted to draw, not because I wanted to want to draw” at the earlier years. We don’t talk about this a lot. That’s really touching how you’ve shared this.
What helps me most when I feel like I'm lost on a side quest is that, whatever I do, I improve. It's like my art xp is going up whether I draw a silly doodle or see a movie. And then when I least expect it, the dam of subconsciously gathered inspiration is broken and I make great stuff. You can never really stop being an artist, even if you take a break or feel lost ❤
i loved the vedio your so inspiring i watched it from beginning to the end i loved every second of it and i loved seeing how you improved at art i hope you all the best and i hope you find your purpose in making art
Your point on being able to spend 6 hours each day for the first year is impressive, but I think there is a misunderstanding in time spent creating art vs time spent studying and applying what you studied. You said someone would take 12 years to have the equivalent time in your first year, but that other person could just focus on improving. Learning figures, perspective, form, etc. There is a balance that needs to be met though. I agree you need to enjoy doing it while also improving all the same like you also mentioned in the video.
Understand the struggle. I was doing alot of comms and was burning out, i didnt particularly enjoy doing most of them, but some of them, when i pushed my boundaries and took on a challenge i was afraid of, i look back at fondly. I took a break from commissions, and am back to doing what i love (alot of fanart) while i am struggling in my personal life. So i just drew what i was feeling, or drew what i wished would happen to help me process it. It feels so good, to just draw whatever i want, post it, and not care about the likes. Its a journey, its all up and down, but pat yourself on the back, you put in the work, and thats something to be proud of, something that takes grit and tears. Hoping you get better days!
What do you want to say with your art and your stories? What do you want to tell people? What do you want them to relate to, to experience, to understand? Find this and I think your art will become so much more meaningful. Well done on your journey so far. 😊
The ending was real, lol. I’ve drawn for a lot of my life as a hobby and although I’m definitely not as good as I want to be, the main reason I draw is what and when I want. Sometimes I lose myself as well when trying to be better at posing or this or that to be as good as I want to be faster, but it’s hard to enjoy when you don’t even know why your doing something. Definitely subbing, and remember to make videos how you want and your art how you want, because people are here for you and your art- not a copy of something else.
THANK you for posting this vulnerable and so meaningful video. The artist's descent into madness is a real thing but that's when you know you have found the right path. You are thinking and questioning and this had led you to realise that art IS the journey. Not the clicks and algorithms and thumbnails and all that meaningless crap everyone is so obsessed about. Making something that speaks to your soul is the true purpose. You are not lost, you have found the path, sending love to your journey, it will last a lifetime!
Regarding the ending I *think* that in order to start creating beautiful things you need to find inspiration outside of art. Start thinking more analitycal why do you like things that you like or something idk I've been drawing for 4 years now, I made some nice pieces but after my year 1 I constantly feel like I'm going back to square one with my art learning and I think it's just what being an artist is. btw. even though I've been drawing for longer you still have much more and better artworks than I have haha, I think art is really your thing but maybe you just need a brake? Go somewhere, take vacation, rethink your life/art idk idk
Thank you for this video. I recently found my mojo to paint again. A friend/mentor asked me why i had fallen off and it was simple. 2020 happened. It was a snowball of unraveling chaos. Losing my corporate job. Relationship. Car. Home. I spent so many years looking to become stable again that I had put something so important to me on the back burner. Now I'm coming back and your video is an inspiration.
JUST WOW. I started watching this video thinking I'd learn a few things and it turns out I found the ONE and only one person that could understand how I've been feeling and put it into words. I've been drawing since I was 2 (27 now) and all my drawings from childhood are stories, I remember spending 10 hours a day during the sumer just drawing comics, it was so much fun. I used to draw fun fantasy world stories with lolita dresses. Then I started university and just stopped. I just couldn't draw, I didn't have the time to fill my mind with stories and characters (exactly like you said), I had more responsibilities and didn't have time. However the worst part was, since what I really loved was creating stories, whatever piece I made felt...meaningless, empty and static. So I grew frustrated and unmotivated. The years went by and I started a couple of projects but never continued past the rush of the first chapters, then I felt like I had to keep improving to be able to make justice to those stories I wanted to tell as an adult, stories I felt were better than my teen ones. So I started practicing portraits, shadows, colours and using references (which I never did when I was younger) and eventhough I got better, I feel like I was practicing with my muscles and not my imagination. I just couldn't come up with things anymore as I used to, I couldn't sit and draw if I didn't have a reference... Last year I started a new project and took a break to practice again, it's been a year and the only thing that happened is that I just been drawing less and less. I just wanted to share this because this video made me feel so seen. Wherever you look, it seems like artists have it figured it out, pretty feeds and successful videos, lots of famous webcomics and printed copies, then I just felt like I'm not enough, not good enough, not creative enough. Thank you. I'll try to bring my creativity back, my motivation. Knowing that one person has felt like this makes me feel understood. I'm glad you ended the video like you did. Sorry for writing this much, I'm just really happy I found your video!!!
This resonated with me… I’m 21, been drawing on and off my whole life, mostly just fanart of games and manga. I put a lot of time into developing my shading/details, I had strong fundamentals and construction just due to the long experience. I did a lot of portraits and studies. But I ended up taking a long break from art while I went to college to study music. I didn’t feel bad putting down the pen because it just felt like a hobby I had outgrown. Like I had exhausted all there was to do drawing a face with a pen. As I grew from an aspiring musician into a fledgling producer/composer though, I learned how to love different workflows, how to step back and look at what in my music would actually resonate with people, how to love each little aspect of the nitty gritty… Until huh, I realized I had fallen in love with art all over again. Less of a simple high school sweetheart love and more of a deeply intertwined, complicated adult love. With this new mindset I picked up my pen again and man, it was like I’d never even put it down. I wanted to challenge myself like I did with music and urged myself on to do landscapes instead of portraits, colors instead of B/W, and focus on grander composition/contrast rather than just expression. When I learned how to layer instruments other than guitars I learned how to make a melody into a song, when I started drawing in new styles they went from sketches to paintings. (satchelmulherin.artstation.com for da plug) It feels to me exactly like how you talk about writing stories instead of just drawing. Every landscape I fill the space with makes me want to write ambient music to bring a listener in… very hand in hand with my goal to be a scifi/fantasy composer for film and games. The music inspires what I want to draw which inspires what I want to write which makes this awesome creative feedback loop.
The last segment really touched me, like honestly I've been going through the same problem. I'm in art school and its totally fucked up my mental space when it comes to art. I got so lost in trying to make my art better that I forgot to love my own creations
An inner working of your mind actually what is missing behind those "How to improve" videos that feels ingenuine and soulless. Im glad you made this video which i may not have learned art but i learned how to love art
"Burnout doesn't come from doing too much, but from doing what you don't enjoy" - This is accurate beyond words. Even after doing art for 10 years, I feel like the path of learning and finding motivation is constant. Sometimes I like what I make, sometimes I hate it, and can definitely say that the pieces ive drawn with the goal of simply doing a portrait study without adding anything personal to it, or (even worse) drawing for the sake of posting on social media are the ones i hate the most. What has kept me going is drawing within a specific fictitious universe, like you in the beginning did with AOT and your own story. The stories we tell and emotions we awake will always outweigh the simplicity of aesthetic appeal. I'd advise everybody, myself included, to build art skills around that goal. Prettiness and technical accuracy will come naturally with practice.
Thank you for the vulnerability and honesty. As an artist and maker I feel very strongly as you do. It is so easy to lose track of our heart and passion when we try to make a living. I am trying to get out of this uncomftable place too, and my "plan" is to 1. make things I haven't done and made time for (like paiting folk motives on my wall) because I was too afraid to do it or it was not a priority 2. try to consume less (social media, film etc) and/or prioritize things that give me a sense of wonder, that really inspires me. 3. reconnect with the crazy exciting idea that feel out of reach (make a video game, animate a whole sort film, create a giant tapestry) and work towards them. Trying to remember why I want to do these and keeping the inner fire alive. I love the rawness of your art at the beginning, because it has this inner fire, the need to tell a story, to create something just for oneself. I hope you kind find your way back to your inner fire!
Thank you a lot for sharing your journey, feelings, insights, and advice! I am sort of a burnt out teacher, with about 8 years of work experience, who left the job. And trying to find my true way in life. Working as a CNC machinist at the moment, just to sustain myself. It’s fine but there’s definitely something else in life I want to do. Art is one of them. I’ve had some inclination to it since the very childhood. But unfortunately I didn’t apply it anywhere. It makes me sad, knowing there’s a whole side of me I do not know. Trying to learn how to draw now. Though due to my psychological challenges I am being inconsistent. Not really thinking about making a living as an artist. My main goal is to learn myself, free my artistic side, and express myself. Your video just felt comforting for some reason. And I decided to share something about myself. Thanks again!
You were coping others and that was important for your growth. You went through a crisis that is inevitable on any path to authenticity. You are doing great
I really enjoyed the video and your progress is immaculate. One thing I commend you on and appreciate is your honesty. You didn't try to deceive or sugarcoat certain aspects of your progress and that made me enjoy watching your it even more.
Haha that's the irony of Art. Its get you, not the other way around. One day, is every day and paradoxically always one day ahead of you. Keep up the amazing work. Thinking too hard def hurts my head.
the painting at 16:30 is so good and kinda hit me like a brick cause you can see all the different concepts you picked up over the time. and in this one they are all at just the right place in just the right amount. for example the blur of closer objects was in some of the early paintings too, but it didnt belong there yet because the rest was still a bit janky. and the chainmail texture was used before as well but never in a framework that didnt make the texture brush stand out way too much. this skeleton infront of the headstone made me stop the video and actually just admire the painting for a minute. good work!
Dude we are literally the same but different. I started learning on 2021, I started learning because I liked the ending of jojo part 8, AND i hate doing commissions. Also youre way better than me lmao
The rant at the end gave me so much insight. As someone who's been drawing to become an artist for 7 years now, I've recently been getting worse, and people don't understand why I say that because my art is still getting better, but my motivation and love for art is so much less. My most creative art was the worst, because it was before I would stress about my techniques and compare my art. I think I realize now what makes the most inspirational artist different isn't the art itself but their meanings and motivations, like you said, their authenticity. This video is amazing, I'm so glad I found it by chance and I really hope to see you reach your goal of giving your art more meaning with the best of luck. Thank you for this video!!
From my experience with art, moments of demotivation like the one you are describing at the end usually come before a breakthrough. They are tough, but feeling dissatisfied with your art sort of forces you to identify the cause and come up with solutions. And after some more messing around, you will find the key to unlock the next stage of your progress. If you only keep trying (which is the hardest part)! I was really struck by the almost ethereal elegance a lot of your paintings have (specifically the full-body studies,) and to me it looks like you have a good portion of the initial skill-learning-curve behind you, and now just have to unite what you learned with the passion you are looking for. It takes some figuring out, but I really hope you keep going because personally, I really enjoyed the work you showed in this video (as did many others judging by the comments!) And I would be curious to see what kind of stories you come up with in the future and how your skill will develop from there! Art can be a pain, but ultimately it's all about translating those worlds you build in your mind into reality, and sharing even an imperfect version of that world with other people can be one of the sweetest experiences ever.
I'm not an artist, but this whole notion of "what was originally a mean to an end later becoming an end in itself that makes you unhappy and that you knew all along" is very relatable
wow this is such a beautiful beautiful video. im also autistic doing exactly what you did your second year focusing on allll the different skills (how i ended up on this video) and this was an incredible warning not to get too wrapped up in the technical stuff and keep balance in my life. i just got a scale tattoo to symbolize my love for balance a couple weeks ago i think its the key to this world and this video really really felt like my future self coming back to warn me to have fun with it and focus on that aspect. the way you speak is so similar to the voice inside my head its comforting im so glad you went off that script because i needed to hear that message. youre following your authenticity and being vulnerable and thats an incredible thing, youre SO right about the inherent value if authenticity and i just wanted to leave you a comment thanking your for all of the value its given me today. dont be so hard on yourself clearly youre finding your way and doing what you need to be and your art is absolutely beautiful!!! youre blessed with the skill (and hard work put in) to create this beauty now is the easy and fun part!!! growing the skill of imagination! and i would love to see more videos of the new stories you come up with having all the knowledge you do now. dont hate on the weird version of yourself that used to exist outside of the real world, that is your core and you need to find BALANCE between that person and the person making this video thats come back into the real world and made friends and everything. let them exist in harmony. omg sorry for the dump on your post you just helped me so much i want to do what i can to help you, if this does. just a little encouragement youre doing amazing!!!❤
from an aspiring artist of a little over 2 years, thank you for keeping it real and reminding me to stay true to myself, its a breath of much needed fresh air
this is not a negative comment, or at least that's how I see it what this video taught me is I need to stop watching specific tutorials and how-to's and guides that all have their own methods and all contradict each other, but more importantly I need to stop trying to motivate myself through other people's experiences. I want to draw for myself, I don't care if it gets popular or not, I might not even post it anywhere, I just want to draw silly little characters and I want to learn anatomy for it. the most common piece of advice I keep hearing is that I wont be burnt out if I have fun and do what I actually enjoy for myself. currently I enjoy my art sometimes when it turns out good but I get annoyed and want to give up (and stop drawing for months) when I spend days on a drawing and it turns out bad, I know what I enjoy, I know what it feels like to be satisfied, but I lack a very important skill to get that feeling more commonly, and learning that skill is something that takes years and is in itself not fun and frustrating - leading to burn out, leading to short 1 week long bursts of desire to learn that end in months of inactivity, over and over again for the past 6 years. I need to stop watching videos like these first and foremost, what I need to do is draw. nothing else. I need to stop trying to make sense of other people's experiences and instead focus on creating mine. the fact that I keep coming back to trying after every few months despite the amount of times I've "given up" is enough for me to know I want to keep trying. I will not pay attention to what youtube artists tell me I shouldn't do, if it feels right at that moment then I'll do it, and I'll have my own regrets about it years in the future. I genuinely hope I will, I hope I will get to that point in the future where I was actually trying continuously, I don't care if I wasn't learning correctly and I don't care how many ideas I get in the future about how I could have drastically sped up the process and been more efficient. if every artist in the entire world is constantly talking about what they did wrong and what you shouldn't do then who's to say those mistakes weren't necessary, am I really improving more if I go through all of them and make sure to deliberately avoid them in my learning process? can that really be called a learning process? keep doing what you do, your art is great in many people's eyes, and I hope you some day find a way to make it great in your eyes as well
Yes, go draw! I know you just said that you didn't want advice from youtube, but if you let me recommend you something for you specifically is making a little more quantity of drawing and sacrificing detail also drawing smaller if you draw too big, for me it's all about giving less importance to the drawing (it's not easy, I have struggled). But it's just like going to the gym, if you think all day of what exercises you have to do, that it's leg day and it's going to suck and feel tired and you don't want to go you're never gonna feel good training, it's just about making the best out of situations and saying "My leg is pumping, that means it was a great workout". I also find myself drawing more this days having an objective, like making a worldbuilding project or a game, the drawings serve the idea, and I make 10 drawings and search 15 articles of engines if I have to to make a cool looking robot, it's about the idea, it's cool to have a pretty drawing but I don't give a shit about that, serve your purpose drawing! I maybe rambling about , take note that I'm no pro artist but I feel the frustration man and I always try to make the most out of it but it's hardddddd... and the fucking instagram likes are like drugs. Always remember to have a cheap sketchbook and pen (I usually use felt tip pen or ballpoint cause cheap and ink makes you better at line quality) don't take it to seriously, just take a full minute or two to think something and say "isn't that a wacky idea, I can make a few doodles/sketches about it" and you go and let the drawing be the medium for a cool idea, not the cool idea be a medium "cause I have to make a good drawing" or drawing for the sake of drawing (not saying that this isn't fine sometimes, but you're looking for something sustainable, and this is what it works for me). That way you have fun, cause you care about the idea and the learning, not the drawing (I'm re reading this and I feel like I sound kinda crazy with the weird gym analogy, I hope you can get something positive out this or feel free to disagree idk I'm not your mom, you do you, pew pew) Don't forget that you can also join around some creative communities like gamedevs or better yet worldbuilding artist, *monstergarden server* ahem. It's great to talk to like minded people and get in the mood for drawing wacky shit.
What you've accomplished in 3 years is incredible and inspiring. I've been drawing since I was a kid but I lack of a lot of direction in my improvement. This video is incredibly valuable.
hey man, i really enjoyed listening to your journey and seeing your progress. i've been hobby drawing since i was a kid, but with no dedication or real focus, and hearing your struggle and passion and commitment and uncertainty really helped me want to set a more clear path for myself. i really appreciate your authenticity here.
The pressure to stay consistent with the times in the art community really changes a person and I don't think I've taken it as seriously as I should. I mean it seems we all put so much love, tears, time, money into this passion knowing that it may not all be worth it in the end if we can't put our names and artworks out there. And at some point, that passion becomes starts to turn into desperation or guilt. Navigating our way back and maintaining ourselves above water, whilst dealing with the rest of the world is truly a process of its own.
Thank you for showing us this! Theres not many videos showing an artists whole entire learning journey. Its so valuable to have such a well documented learning period.
Great video! I was studying about 3rd point perspective and it was vert entertaining to hear, i hope your dream comes true! And your skeleton with a fire sword drawing was really cool!
Amazing video - but I kept laughing at the fact that you learned and fell in love with art because you didn’t like the AOT ending 😭😭😭
It's even funnier when you remember that everything in AOT started because of a pig.
@@TalonFredricksa pig??
Hey sometimes hatred can be the best motivation
That’s what inspired me to start writing! Being a big hater 😭😭💀
I died hearing that. I’m also 3 years in bc I wanted to draw Levi a different ending
lol nothing like the NEED to correct a canon ending to make you learn a new skill... mad respect
Now he must learn animation and correct Berserk 2016
making art for ONLY YOURSELF is the BEST ADVICE I could have ever heard
Yes
nah make art because AOT has a very bad ending
@@tatey9812 💯
Gen curioianwhat else do can you make art for?(from begginners view)
@@user-bf3yh6ue7p making art for others is something i struggled with heavily. In the point of view that I needed to prove myself and prove that art was worth making.
I am so glad this ended on my page. I’ve been drawing for over 10 years. And I feel the same way about my art as you do: it feels like I want to want to create art. I remember when I was a kid I would have so much fun drawing anime characters or creating my own OCs. Then I was trying to make stories for them. These days it feels like I am chasing something, except I don’t know what. I want to be better at art, but why? To get more commissions? To get more followers? It makes me so sad because I rarely enjoy what I do and I tend to hate my art a lot now, even though it is so much better technically than what I did as a kid. But back then art was about fun… I hope we both can find that fun again,
Yoooooooo
i had the exact (or atleast a very similar) problem.
I think it is simply that the "desire to create" fundamentally on a human perspective sense is that you want to create value which is currently "lacking".
Look at his story. He felt something was "lacking" from the ending of attack on titan and he simply burned with the fire of using his own emotional blueprint, his own values, likes and dislikes to make them a reality. Then with the years of studying for that goal he lost sight of this simple premise.
Im not saying that he should make the attack on titan ending. Maybe he even did. It is about not letting your learning process and improvement become your biggest connection to art.
I recently realised that for me personally it simply was a lack of confidence and a need to please others. Please others with my skills, with my abillitys, how impressive the things i do where etc etc. I was never allowing myself to digg truely deep because first i wanted to learn more, more, more. "Just mastering one more concept and then i will start creating what i truely want".
A need to proof my worth essentially.
The external functionality, the comparisons and the learning became a self feeding machine with got facillitated by the use of social media which robbed me day for day of my enjoyment for art.
So how did i crawl back out ?
For me it was going back to synchronizing myself with the "lack" in my life. What are the fantasy/value worlds i wanted to create ? What are my true inspirations and not just
other artists skills which are impressive and therefore i need to compare myself to them ?
I got swept up by the learning, studying, comparing etc etc...
If you dont get in touch with what really drives you you simply become an analyst. A machine of fundamentals, understanding and production always chasing the next
higher skill level to "provide" with your abillitys. But for what ? For which lack ?
What do you REALLY like ? Is it really necessary to gather all these skills and all these aspects if they are in the end only shallow skills which do not even help you achieving what you
truely want ?
For me the solution was to beeing more discriminatory towards my medium intake. Do i really like these things or am i simply studying these because they are technically impressive and i need to feel save in my abillitys to reproduce ?
Was i getting blind to my own emotional resonance ?
Allow yourself to start creating what you want. Allow yourself taking your time and feeling out which "lack" which "void" you want to fill with your art.
From the most heart shattering painting which flips the human condition on his head in a profound way or simply wanting to draw cute cats.
It is all valid and in essence the key to happiness and fulfillment in art.
Now for something less abstact and more applicable:
Write down your ideas, sort them by value (what they mean to you, what you like, what you dont like) without thinking about EXTERNAL validation.
Then execute the selected idea and learn for that. Let your desire to express your own internal blueprint become your reason for improvement. Nothing else.
This methode keeps you project and value oriented and does not disconnect your learning from your end goal.
This is however fucking scarry. Now you are on. Now the game has started. You are creating now what you truely desire.
What you truely want. No more studys, comissions, half baked studys for others or all that jazz. When this stuff looks shit it feels like it is all on you.
No more:" Ah thats just a study, im just training, short sketch, WIP hell". No ! Finished, polished art which reflects what you want. What you are.
The pressure is on.
To fail these drawings which truely mean something to you will feel a billion times more stressfull then studying 1000 books about art fundamentals.
But this will keep you happy. Your goal will become once again your driver.
This was and is the way for me to reconnect with art.
I dont know your struggles exactly and maybe im missing the mark here by a thousand mile but i think it does not hurt to share these insights.
Have a nice day and happy drawin :D !
@@flux1940 thanks for this. it provided insight i didn't know i needed. im literally about to go make that list of ideas!!!
@@mellodotjpeg im glad :D !
@@flux1940Wow, thank you! I’m sure you absolutely nailed it for a lot of us. Especially when sharing art on social media it’s so easy to get into the trap „doing what others might like“. Loose ones own path … again, thank you!
@@cequ :)
That last comment about making art "not because you want to want to make art, but just doing it", resonated with me a lot. I was an art student fresh out of college and took a gap year because my family and I were moving countries. I loved art. I loved the drawing, the perfection, the idea process and I loved the art block. But I stopped drawing. Life got to me and I completely stopped doing what I loved. Every 6 months I would end up doing one art peice before going back to emptiness and I never knew why. No practices, nothing. But even though I'd move countries often, I would ALWAYS bring my empty sketchbook, with my best pencils. And when I'd move again, I'd take that exact empty book and move once more. Why? Why carry it when you're not even using it? Is it hope? That childlike happiness when you hear the pencil scrape and slide against the paper? I'm not sure. But I love it. Today, I prepped my paper. I outlined a border :D
For me, this is a milestone. I always think, rather than to jsut do. It's been eating and eating at my life in other aspects, but. Even having that happiness in what I could do brings joy in knowing that I absolutely can. I jsut shouldn't ever look back. To keep looking at life in the long run, because worrying about it now is getting me nowhere.
Thank you for the video, it really helped :)
P.s. I'm always afraid of making mistakes. I mentioned I liked the perfection, but that is a lie. Nothing is and I've jsut accepted it. The prefect is in the impurities of an art piece, which is why I get excited because inherently, there's always meaning in the pieces. That bring me solitude
@@Rose-luna23 SamdoesArt said something similar in his recent video about why he hates his art (lately). He was overly focused on accurately depicting every part of the subject that he was drawing, which ended up creating very rigid pieces that lacked character. I think striving for perfection in art can lead to a lot of negative emotions if you walk the path for too long.
I am a computer engineer. I completely gave up on doing art professionally. I just couldn't see me loving it as a job, with the stress of staying relevant, to be an entrepreneur and market yourself constantly.
I also never wanted success or fame. Only dream was to make something that people would discuss a lot. Not me, but my art. And I can totally do that without doing art fulltime. It just takes more time.
The bit about bringing along an empty sketchbook resonates with me so hard. I did the exact same thing whenever I would travel, for so many years. Eventually, I just stopped because it would take up precious luggage space. But recently, I've gotten the spark back, even if it's just a fraction of what I felt when I was a teenager. I've drawn more this year than I have in the past 6. I think I'll bring my sketchbook with me on my next trip. :)
Not me clicking this video to learn as much about art as I can, only to discovered why I’ve been demotivated and irritated by making my art and now idk what to do next because I’m so burnt out and stuck 😔 lmao
Same
making art makes me suicidal. not making art too guess I'll die better that way
Take a few weeks or a few months not making any art or and when you comeback youll know if you want to continue or not
Jezz… stop clicking art videos then, you feel bad cause you keep comparing yourself with others.
Come back to these videos in 2 years after you’ve got plenty of practice
DID YOU DRAW YOUR PFP
As a nonfunctional member of society, I also draw 6 hours a day, desperately trying to get better.
I’m going on this same journey and have come across a lot of the same things. I’ve finally started just drawing or painting something if I got the thought in my head to do it, rather than thinking I’m not ready for it, and have to do more studies first.
I started learning art because I love it. Then, it became a necessity-the only job I could or would pursue.
Now, recently, I just love it again. I fell in love with the challenge of improvement and the simple act of being able to draw whatever I have in my head, regardless of my skill level.
This is such a great video. I’ve also been losing my mind for the last two years, and probably longer if I’m being honest. But my obsession with art practically keeps me alive.
I can’t wait to see more from you, good luck!
Man it’s good to see I’m not the only one losing my mind in this process😂. I’m 33 and decided I was going to dedicate my life to art 11 months ago. It is definitely a roller coaster. Like you I’m in love with the feeling of improving. I’m really hard on myself and sometimes focus too much on the technical side of things but now I’m trying to improve with subjects that have meaning to me. Just wanted to say we’re here together🫶🏼
Bro the ending... When you talk about your art journey long enough, it ends up being a therapy session. Loved this video. I loved the part about finding value in authenticity and passion. It's a rare thing. I hope you get your mind back bro, unlike Edvard Munch.
the autism part killed me ahaha it's so relatable. Thank you for keeping that last part. I started watching this because I stopped drawing for about 2 years, and I thought it would be a good thing to come back to the basics and study a little bit until I get the will to draw something for myself again, but I ended up gaining insight on my art block too.
Reality sucks, man. I wanna go back but don't want to give up being a so-called productive member of society
“i want to make art that captures the love for beautiful things”
love this sentiment. and nothing you did was garbage. don’t be hard on yourself. this video did a lot to inspire me. ty
damn @22:24 ..."copies are good for learning but when you only do those you forget, you can do more than just a copy. You lose the confidence." been doing so many portrait paintings of reference photos that what i thought ive been chasing the satisfaction was not because i made it, is because i was able to paint it exactly the same as the picture, which is also discouraging at the same time cuz its not something that screams authenticity. Kind of reminds me of how my mother would always say everytime i show her my "art", "why would I need to look at your art if i could just look at a picture?" hurts a lot because it is true.
"The discipline of an artist is not to push through when its not fun but rather to find ways to make it fun" I will forever remember that, thank you for making this video. You reminded me of how much I love art in the beginning because it was fun, it made me happy.
10:50 that moustache man right there, is the best joke I've encountered this month 😂.
Oh.... Was that Austrian painter reference... Oh...oh i did not realise that till I read ur comment😅
This sits in top 3 artist jokery
it caught me so off guard lmaooo
Im so inspired by this video. i think your brushwork and composition and lighting are gorgeous, but im rooting for you to find passion again!!! i can't tell you how long ive felt the same way you have, i wish you the best
ive been drawing since i was a kid and im still not the best at any of the fundamentals. im nowhere near as technically skilled as i want to be, but this video helped me feel better about just enjoying the process. i really love it
The part about getting the correct feedback is so true! As someone who went to an art college, teachers can make you hate art and the feedback they give you is often destructive- both to your art and to your mental health. Love your outlook on the learning process!
Holy shit I love this video so much, the words “wanting to want to do art” have been my life for the past year. It’s difficult wanting to be better, seeing how far your art needs to grow, and wanting to grow it for the things you want to create. But by the time you’ve gotten there you’ve forgotten how and why you wanted to make those things, how to make something real. Sometimes I get glimpses of passion and a want to work but it’s hard, everything about art is fleeting and impossible to capture twice. Anyway yeah this just resonated with me a lot, thank you for making an honest video about how your art journey has gone, I don’t think I’ve ever heard another artist be so candid about they’re experience
hey man this video felt genuine and i enjoyed to hear what you have to say about losing the mind to art it really sound insightful
That's relatable. I used to try to imitate what other bigger artists did, going for the same subjects and style as them and that made me so miserable I felt myself slipping into an art block in my first year learning how to draw seriously. It actually took me a day doodling fun little character from imagination like when I was a kid to start to like to draw again. And time and time again I realize how import it is to draw what you love, what you think is fun or interesting. You have to find a fine balance between doing what you really want and doing studies because if you get stuck only drawing stuff you are not interested or boring studies oh boy, there's no fast way to kill your will to make art.
I feel this! I have a problem where I compare myself to others and think “What should I draw that other people will like?” And try to do all this planning and everything, and nothing really comes out on the page. Yet when I just sit in front of my sketchbook with no plans except my pencil, eraser and a podcast, I am able to create work I am so genuinely proud of and love. And those are always the works of art I get told look the best too!
I miss videos like this that are slower paced and arent heavily edited. Thanks for sharing!
i know right- i really hate those art "tutorials" with a lot of irrelevant cuts and clips of memes??
I really like how much time you took pointing out that fun/passion has to be the backbone of art making and sacrificing that for anything is a sure way to lose interest/burn out.
i'm insanely insanely impressed with your progress. usually i just listen to youtube videos on the background but i sat and watched this the whole way through, eyes glued - the changes were gradual, but also stark enough that if i looked away for a minute i'd audibly go 'holy shit' when i glanced back. on the point of passion, one thing that caught my eye was at 28:40 - the metal/chains are SO well-rendered, but you're talking about how you were doing portraits and not really loving it. it’s so clear where your passion actually was! reminded me of earlier in the video when you mentioned that wanting to learn to render swords/armor was a huge breakthrough point for your improvement, and how chasing that passion led you to understand lighting so much better. it all tied into your point about burnout, which i thought was a great thesis of this vid
youtube is an art form, but one you're clearly also very good at!!! amazing vid overall, got a sub from me 🫶
Thank you for sharing your experience. I had mental problems when I was a teenager. So I tried to drawing everything what’s around me, and not focusing what’s inside me. And I realized how is beautiful world around me. To understand yourself you have to look around.
Art is language, and good to know it well. And it’s not about technique. Contemporary art is the key.
Sorry for my English
Man, 32:49 could easily belong in an illustrated version of Game of Thrones. The jump in quality after you started drawing skulls and learning proportions+perspective+anatomy is actually crazy. The expression some of your pieces have is insane too, kudos for that.
Loved the video, it was very real. I've been drawing for about a month now and i'm just focusing on all the face fundamentals (currently reading Loomis's book) and it's painful lmao. I've never been an artistic person so the motivation for me is the challenge itself, but it's a brutal rite of passage everyone has to go through to create meaningful pieces. This video gave me hope to endure it, otherwise i'm not going to make art that feels authentic to me.
Thanks again.
This video made me cry man especially at the end...I relate a lot to what you've said and it's quite similar to my own art journey. Just subbed, I like slower paced videos like this because it's a lot easier to digest tbh, anyways I wish you luck on your journey moving forward!!
🦖raahhh
crybaby
27:48 Because you see all errors that you don't catch the past few years. It's mean that you improve a lot and understand what you need to focus on next. Art is marathon, not a sprint. And you make great improvement in just 3 years. Keep it !
Thank you so much for this video, it felt like a hug from someone whose been through struggles and wishes the best for others. I hope you will be able to find the passion you once had again and know that time is in your hands
this video felt like a warm hug, ive been struggling a lot and just,,, ❤❤❤ (side note i feel called out hahah, i used to draw so so much every day every week)
I am a traditional painter, and I can tell you, you can learn values separately from colour. It works like layers on photoshop. First paint gray scale painting, wait it to dry completely, and the glaze it with transparent colours layer by layer letting each one to fully dry. It is a old masters technique of oil painting and it is being used for hundreds of years.
Man you spoke of nothing but facts. I am in the exact same spot as you. I've been drawing faces my whole life and I am pretty good at capturing accuracy. People mostly praise my works because of the faces I draw. I am fucking terrified of drawing without a reference. It's like walking in the darkness and trying to find your way forward. Since I've started using them I improved a lot but also completely forgot a lot of things. My mind goes completely blank. And it shows in my drawings too. I've been drawing since primary school and now I am about to leave college. And I was stuck in practice cycle for years. I never used colour or ink. I told myself I am not good enough to finish anything and was just grinding portraits and some "fundamentals". But you have to actually finish things to be good at well, finishing things. I am finally trying to use colour this year and even though it looks terrible I am having fun. You've improved a lot in these few years and I hope you find joy in drawing again. Thank you for this video
Lesson learned, the "nerdy loser" in us have had all the answers all along.
But really, I have also struggled with learning to actually enjoy making art again. it reminds me of a saying I heard that cracking an egg from the outside is destructive but Cracking the shell from the inside is creation. I don't remember it in detail but I think that with this making art for external resons to get better, to make a living and follow trends is more destructive whilst internal reasons like doing it cause you feel like it and are passionate, or you want to make a better ending for a show you like, those types of resons are nurturing your art in a good way.
Thank you for adding the ending. It resonates with me. And as you siad poplecznicy really care when soul put into it (unlike ai art), that last 3 minutes felt like deep from your heart
And it so true about caring social media, analysing other, stilling their strategies, caring about the views and likes. I wonder how the people who draw the stories for years, how they kept being emerged into the characters and plot, that might be insane focus. I wish you to get back to you initially desired path!
thank you so much for leaving in the part at the end. i’ve also been struggling a lot with making ‘real’ art, stuff that is genuinely inspired and meaningful. you touched on something i’ve been exactly feeling and it really eats away at me. i look at a lot of your stuff and really see something in it, so it reminds me i’m not just broken. it sounds dramatic but sometimes when i can make something technically decent which people compliment, but emotionally/conceptually dull, it feels like there is a real block inside me. it’s like i don’t know something which all these other great artists know. that’s not true though, because great artists make stuff about what they care about or feel, and i am definitely capable of caring and feeling. anyway, it’s just good to know other people making art go through this - and that the most important thing is to keep making out of enjoyment, not just to be objectively successful because that is what makes it dull.
Dude just keep drawing and dont worry if its the right thing or not. As artists we go through phases. Phases of passion, analysis and recovery. You went through a MAJOORRRR phase of passion. Sounds like you're either in a phase of analysis or strongly fighting a recovery phase. I got out of art school last may and although i still make stuff ive given myself a lot of time to recoup after 4 years of making art 20-40 hours a week. A phase of analysis is okay, its alright to focus on fundamentals like a student and maybe not constantly work on passion projects, itll help you in the long run. I think youre doing a good job and a lot of people are seeing valur in your recent work.
As someone who has been drawing for like 10+ years now, you're doing fine. You've made a lot of progress in just 3 years, your painting are beautiful. It's okay to hit a plateau in your progress, it happens a lot. In fact you'll encounter them many times in your art journey, not all your progress is going to be straight up sometimes you gotta go sideways if that makes sense. Take these times to think about things you want to do with your art and the things you already like about your art. It's good that you're diversifying your mediums, digital art can do a lot but there's a lot to learn using pen and paper. Good luck with your art journey, you're gonna be ok 👍
Your landscape paintings convey emotions, even from the beginning. Truly beautiful.
You said you want to create something "real" , let me tell you bro, this speech was VERY real. And relatable.
Proud of you, don't give up.
this is just insanely inspirational, the way i gasped at your improvement! it honestly makes me reflect on my own journey and the fact that i really could’ve been doing more for myself in the year that ive been learning…
forcing myself to sit down and do studies made me unmotivated to draw, drawing to post on social media had the same effect, i had cool ideas for projects and illustrations but i was holding myself back because i didn’t feel good enough to do them.
but this video brought a bit of light back into my life and i think you should keep up the great work!
i also rarely comment on things.. but this video really left a mark for me thankyouu🙌
This video really spoke to me. As a fellow person with autism on her sixth year of art block, I've been beating myself up about how much I could have improved by now if I was drawing consistently. The fact that you improved so much in only 3 years is mind-blowing.
The most I ever drew was when I would roleplay with my friends in middle school, creating silly OCs with intertwining stories. Now, I have to force myself to draw and it doesn't come naturally anymore.
Your video has inspired me to keep trying to find new ways to make it fun. I was never happier than when I was regularly drawing.
I resonate so hard with this. I used to draw so much when I was younger and obsessed with the characters I had in my head, but now I just feel so much frustration when I force myself to find a reference and draw it, I do it because I want my art to look better and more accurate, but it sucks all of the fun out of it. Its hard to get back into the groove of just creating art that you love and not worrying so much about the technicality of it
Take a look at Araki's story, the author of Jojo's, hes very very analaytical and flips between working on passions and working on the fundamentals and foundational aspects, even if it wasnt exactly what he wanted to think about.
This is one of the realest fucking videos I've ever seen, I greatly admire the vulnerability displayed near the end. Nothing but love and respect and you've given some great insight, rooting for you man
this is the best video i have ever seen in my entire life. thank you so much. i was falling into a death spiral hating my art and losing my goal, this brought me back to where im supposed to be
Thank you for this beautiful and honest video. I myself have been making art on and off for years (not professionally) and I have struggles similar to yours when it comes to "am I enjoying what I'm doing?" "why am I doing it?" "where's my fascination with art that was there when I just started?" - it's still there but it changed a lot. Your video made me think about what to do next. I haven't been drawing from imagination for years. I've been doing a lot of plein air (I'm into landscapes) and I feel like while I'm learning a lot from plein air its still copying, only from nature and not from a photo. So where am I in this?
Sorry for the long comment, I just want to thank you for making me think and I wish you a lot of luck and I hope you find yourself again with your new skills in art. In fact I know you will.
I genuinely had to stop posting my art on social media in order to love it again. When i make something im proud of and then put it up on some website where a stranger is going to basically look at it for half a second and move on, i start suddenly feeling very insecure about something that originally made me feel excited and happy. Honsetly, if you want to make money iff of your art, you are going to have to put up with tough competition, poor treatment, and burn out. Some people can handle it and others cant. If you simply want to enjoy your art, forget about the audience entirely.
you described literally my entire progression
This video really got a hit on me. Your testimony is quite similar to what I'm living and thinking about pursue... Except I am about two years before you!
Maybe you won't find this comment, but just now that you probably changed the way I thought about art.
Will keep your video saved for when I need to watch it again. Don't give up! I hope you find your true way again, and don't you dare go hollow!
THAT OPENING ALREADY CERTIFIED THIS VIDEO AS A STRAIGHT BANGER
ALL MY HOMIES HATE THE SNK ENDING
kind of eerie how similar our journey is. ive kinda went through all the same stages lol, I started in august 2021, grinded like 8 hours a day. except I instead focused on spending all 8 hours on 1 drawing lol. then in like 2022 I started focusing fundamentals and then 2023 I feel I created my best work of art and cant seem to top it or get that magic back on any other paintings. and just recently started posting to youtube. still trying to figure out where my journey leads me here though.
A really vulnerable comment on art and the self. Thank you for sharing!
those flowers at 33:22 are gorgeous 😭 also i love your leyendecker(?)-esque ones. the gorgeous pastoral flower fields and timeless clothing and delicate hair.
i hope you find your way again and truly draw from imagination! i majored in graphic design due to overlap with hobbies and graduated; took some illustration courses. in terms of technical skill, i was good especially with references, but i had zero imagination. none whatsoever. and i had zero interest in my hobbies in the last years of school. it's back now that i don't work in that field.
imagination is a gift. draw what you love.
This was more entertaining, inspiring and helpfull than i thought when i clicked on it. I just wanted to have something on in the background while eating, now my food is cold. Thank you for making this video and talking so openly about your struggles and how you overcame them. Maybe i need to start painting again *-*
I appreciate it that you shared this video, and improving in art requires discipline more than any other factors. As an artist still learning the fundamentals, I relate to you. I have experienced art block, and doubted my creativity. I beleive that to do creative art, you should learn the fundamentals and apply them. I agree that storytelling requires thinking skills, but so is applying the fundamental knowledge. Instead of dwelling in thinking about your lost passion, try recreating the stories by applying your knowledge. Maybe take a break for a while and get back to drawing. Your mental well-being is important too. You did a great job with the fundamentals, and I wish you good luck in your journey. Hope this helps! :)
This video is so real i love the end bit. Im self taught and just doing art as a hobby (ive only been drawing people for like 2 years) so i at first was really jealous of how you were actually studying and talking to a mentor and generally had a rigorous approach bc i just draw fictional characters i really like and occasionally watch yt videos if i want to learn something specific. While i draw around five hours a day and ive improved a ton in faces, anatomy, poses, clothes/folds, and just started not hating my digital work (im mostly a traditional artist but its my goal to be equal in both), but i dont have the discipline to really study things like backgrounds, objects, the technicalities of lighting/rendering, and perspective, and you inspired me to branch out! But more than inspiring me in studying and stuff, youve inspired me to make a story that i love because it can push me out of my comfort zone while making me actually WANT to do so. Thanks for being real and youll get through this rough patch and find something-maybe another story of your own-that inspires you as well ❤(edit: i just saw you made a part 2 and you’re already planning out a story thats awesome!!!)
Finished the video like a true artist. Original, genuine, and depressed.
I started in 2021 aswell. Looking back at my art I really see progress and it's very inspiring. I understand wanting to want to make art, as a person who recently got a job in the games industry, making characters, I'm afraid of loosing the spark bc of all the corporate "that's not possible" bullshit. I just want to make good art, fun characters, sometimes I forget that and it feels impossible to even start. You're a real one for leaving the last part of the video in.
Dear Frej… you have saved a lot of people from taking the route from need to want, pulling the ego away from the pits of hell 😂 to the path of simplicity… that may sound stupid but I think you’ve touched soooo many hearts with your testimony……. Touched my heart … my 3 month all new to ever picking up a pencil and drawing… I love it … I don’t know why I love art all of a sudden but in this moment, I do and I can’t thank you enough for showing me that beautiful hill ahead, that I think I would have started running up it and begun to hate the feeling of that internal strain… instead of taking in the view the joy the inspiration and passion, beauty.. … I want to be good/ really good at drawing/painting… and I know how to burn myself out… thank you for saving me 😂❤❤❤
The ending of that video I feel is so real- reaching a point in art where you’re consumed by the idea of being an artist that you lose focus of the “drawing because I wanted to draw, not because I wanted to want to draw” at the earlier years. We don’t talk about this a lot. That’s really touching how you’ve shared this.
What helps me most when I feel like I'm lost on a side quest is that, whatever I do, I improve. It's like my art xp is going up whether I draw a silly doodle or see a movie. And then when I least expect it, the dam of subconsciously gathered inspiration is broken and I make great stuff. You can never really stop being an artist, even if you take a break or feel lost ❤
dang you nailed all my problems with art in just one video
i loved the vedio your so inspiring i watched it from beginning to the end i loved every second of it and i loved seeing how you improved at art i hope you all the best and i hope you find your purpose in making art
Your point on being able to spend 6 hours each day for the first year is impressive, but I think there is a misunderstanding in time spent creating art vs time spent studying and applying what you studied. You said someone would take 12 years to have the equivalent time in your first year, but that other person could just focus on improving. Learning figures, perspective, form, etc. There is a balance that needs to be met though. I agree you need to enjoy doing it while also improving all the same like you also mentioned in the video.
Understand the struggle. I was doing alot of comms and was burning out, i didnt particularly enjoy doing most of them, but some of them, when i pushed my boundaries and took on a challenge i was afraid of, i look back at fondly. I took a break from commissions, and am back to doing what i love (alot of fanart) while i am struggling in my personal life. So i just drew what i was feeling, or drew what i wished would happen to help me process it. It feels so good, to just draw whatever i want, post it, and not care about the likes. Its a journey, its all up and down, but pat yourself on the back, you put in the work, and thats something to be proud of, something that takes grit and tears. Hoping you get better days!
What do you want to say with your art and your stories? What do you want to tell people? What do you want them to relate to, to experience, to understand? Find this and I think your art will become so much more meaningful. Well done on your journey so far. 😊
The ending was real, lol. I’ve drawn for a lot of my life as a hobby and although I’m definitely not as good as I want to be, the main reason I draw is what and when I want. Sometimes I lose myself as well when trying to be better at posing or this or that to be as good as I want to be faster, but it’s hard to enjoy when you don’t even know why your doing something.
Definitely subbing, and remember to make videos how you want and your art how you want, because people are here for you and your art- not a copy of something else.
THANK you for posting this vulnerable and so meaningful video. The artist's descent into madness is a real thing but that's when you know you have found the right path. You are thinking and questioning and this had led you to realise that art IS the journey. Not the clicks and algorithms and thumbnails and all that meaningless crap everyone is so obsessed about. Making something that speaks to your soul is the true purpose. You are not lost, you have found the path, sending love to your journey, it will last a lifetime!
Regarding the ending I *think* that in order to start creating beautiful things you need to find inspiration outside of art. Start thinking more analitycal why do you like things that you like or something idk
I've been drawing for 4 years now, I made some nice pieces but after my year 1 I constantly feel like I'm going back to square one with my art learning and I think it's just what being an artist is.
btw. even though I've been drawing for longer you still have much more and better artworks than I have haha, I think art is really your thing but maybe you just need a brake? Go somewhere, take vacation, rethink your life/art idk idk
4:17 that "SHOCK" with that drawing got me- LMAO
I don't think I've ever watched a more motivating and helpful art video. you're so real bro.
I love how you tackle this video. Focusing a lot on the phycology of the learning process. Which I think is what sets 90% of artists back
Thank you for this video. I recently found my mojo to paint again. A friend/mentor asked me why i had fallen off and it was simple. 2020 happened. It was a snowball of unraveling chaos. Losing my corporate job. Relationship. Car. Home. I spent so many years looking to become stable again that I had put something so important to me on the back burner. Now I'm coming back and your video is an inspiration.
JUST WOW. I started watching this video thinking I'd learn a few things and it turns out I found the ONE and only one person that could understand how I've been feeling and put it into words. I've been drawing since I was 2 (27 now) and all my drawings from childhood are stories, I remember spending 10 hours a day during the sumer just drawing comics, it was so much fun. I used to draw fun fantasy world stories with lolita dresses. Then I started university and just stopped. I just couldn't draw, I didn't have the time to fill my mind with stories and characters (exactly like you said), I had more responsibilities and didn't have time. However the worst part was, since what I really loved was creating stories, whatever piece I made felt...meaningless, empty and static. So I grew frustrated and unmotivated. The years went by and I started a couple of projects but never continued past the rush of the first chapters, then I felt like I had to keep improving to be able to make justice to those stories I wanted to tell as an adult, stories I felt were better than my teen ones. So I started practicing portraits, shadows, colours and using references (which I never did when I was younger) and eventhough I got better, I feel like I was practicing with my muscles and not my imagination. I just couldn't come up with things anymore as I used to, I couldn't sit and draw if I didn't have a reference... Last year I started a new project and took a break to practice again, it's been a year and the only thing that happened is that I just been drawing less and less. I just wanted to share this because this video made me feel so seen. Wherever you look, it seems like artists have it figured it out, pretty feeds and successful videos, lots of famous webcomics and printed copies, then I just felt like I'm not enough, not good enough, not creative enough. Thank you. I'll try to bring my creativity back, my motivation. Knowing that one person has felt like this makes me feel understood. I'm glad you ended the video like you did. Sorry for writing this much, I'm just really happy I found your video!!!
This resonated with me…
I’m 21, been drawing on and off my whole life, mostly just fanart of games and manga. I put a lot of time into developing my shading/details, I had strong fundamentals and construction just due to the long experience. I did a lot of portraits and studies. But I ended up taking a long break from art while I went to college to study music. I didn’t feel bad putting down the pen because it just felt like a hobby I had outgrown. Like I had exhausted all there was to do drawing a face with a pen.
As I grew from an aspiring musician into a fledgling producer/composer though, I learned how to love different workflows, how to step back and look at what in my music would actually resonate with people, how to love each little aspect of the nitty gritty…
Until huh, I realized I had fallen in love with art all over again. Less of a simple high school sweetheart love and more of a deeply intertwined, complicated adult love. With this new mindset I picked up my pen again and man, it was like I’d never even put it down.
I wanted to challenge myself like I did with music and urged myself on to do landscapes instead of portraits, colors instead of B/W, and focus on grander composition/contrast rather than just expression. When I learned how to layer instruments other than guitars I learned how to make a melody into a song, when I started drawing in new styles they went from sketches to paintings.
(satchelmulherin.artstation.com for da plug)
It feels to me exactly like how you talk about writing stories instead of just drawing. Every landscape I fill the space with makes me want to write ambient music to bring a listener in… very hand in hand with my goal to be a scifi/fantasy composer for film and games.
The music inspires what I want to draw which inspires what I want to write which makes this awesome creative feedback loop.
The last segment really touched me, like honestly I've been going through the same problem. I'm in art school and its totally fucked up my mental space when it comes to art. I got so lost in trying to make my art better that I forgot to love my own creations
An inner working of your mind actually what is missing behind those "How to improve" videos that feels ingenuine and soulless. Im glad you made this video which i may not have learned art but i learned how to love art
"Burnout doesn't come from doing too much, but from doing what you don't enjoy" - This is accurate beyond words. Even after doing art for 10 years, I feel like the path of learning and finding motivation is constant. Sometimes I like what I make, sometimes I hate it, and can definitely say that the pieces ive drawn with the goal of simply doing a portrait study without adding anything personal to it, or (even worse) drawing for the sake of posting on social media are the ones i hate the most.
What has kept me going is drawing within a specific fictitious universe, like you in the beginning did with AOT and your own story. The stories we tell and emotions we awake will always outweigh the simplicity of aesthetic appeal. I'd advise everybody, myself included, to build art skills around that goal. Prettiness and technical accuracy will come naturally with practice.
Thank you for the vulnerability and honesty. As an artist and maker I feel very strongly as you do. It is so easy to lose track of our heart and passion when we try to make a living. I am trying to get out of this uncomftable place too, and my "plan" is to 1. make things I haven't done and made time for (like paiting folk motives on my wall) because I was too afraid to do it or it was not a priority 2. try to consume less (social media, film etc) and/or prioritize things that give me a sense of wonder, that really inspires me. 3. reconnect with the crazy exciting idea that feel out of reach (make a video game, animate a whole sort film, create a giant tapestry) and work towards them. Trying to remember why I want to do these and keeping the inner fire alive.
I love the rawness of your art at the beginning, because it has this inner fire, the need to tell a story, to create something just for oneself. I hope you kind find your way back to your inner fire!
Dude ive been drawing my whole life and youre amazing in just three years im super jelly 😭
Thank you a lot for sharing your journey, feelings, insights, and advice!
I am sort of a burnt out teacher, with about 8 years of work experience, who left the job. And trying to find my true way in life.
Working as a CNC machinist at the moment, just to sustain myself. It’s fine but there’s definitely something else in life I want to do.
Art is one of them. I’ve had some inclination to it since the very childhood. But unfortunately I didn’t apply it anywhere. It makes me sad, knowing there’s a whole side of me I do not know.
Trying to learn how to draw now. Though due to my psychological challenges I am being inconsistent. Not really thinking about making a living as an artist. My main goal is to learn myself, free my artistic side, and express myself.
Your video just felt comforting for some reason. And I decided to share something about myself.
Thanks again!
You were coping others and that was important for your growth. You went through a crisis that is inevitable on any path to authenticity. You are doing great
I really enjoyed the video and your progress is immaculate. One thing I commend you on and appreciate is your honesty. You didn't try to deceive or sugarcoat certain aspects of your progress and that made me enjoy watching your it even more.
Haha that's the irony of Art. Its get you, not the other way around. One day, is every day and paradoxically always one day ahead of you. Keep up the amazing work. Thinking too hard def hurts my head.
This is one of the best videos I’ve ever seen about making art.
“I want to make something real” - this video was a great step in that direction
the painting at 16:30 is so good and kinda hit me like a brick cause you can see all the different concepts you picked up over the time. and in this one they are all at just the right place in just the right amount.
for example the blur of closer objects was in some of the early paintings too, but it didnt belong there yet because the rest was still a bit janky. and the chainmail texture was used before as well but never in a framework that didnt make the texture brush stand out way too much.
this skeleton infront of the headstone made me stop the video and actually just admire the painting for a minute. good work!
Dude we are literally the same but different. I started learning on 2021, I started learning because I liked the ending of jojo part 8, AND i hate doing commissions. Also youre way better than me lmao
The rant at the end gave me so much insight. As someone who's been drawing to become an artist for 7 years now, I've recently been getting worse, and people don't understand why I say that because my art is still getting better, but my motivation and love for art is so much less. My most creative art was the worst, because it was before I would stress about my techniques and compare my art. I think I realize now what makes the most inspirational artist different isn't the art itself but their meanings and motivations, like you said, their authenticity. This video is amazing, I'm so glad I found it by chance and I really hope to see you reach your goal of giving your art more meaning with the best of luck. Thank you for this video!!
From my experience with art, moments of demotivation like the one you are describing at the end usually come before a breakthrough. They are tough, but feeling dissatisfied with your art sort of forces you to identify the cause and come up with solutions. And after some more messing around, you will find the key to unlock the next stage of your progress. If you only keep trying (which is the hardest part)!
I was really struck by the almost ethereal elegance a lot of your paintings have (specifically the full-body studies,) and to me it looks like you have a good portion of the initial skill-learning-curve behind you, and now just have to unite what you learned with the passion you are looking for.
It takes some figuring out, but I really hope you keep going because personally, I really enjoyed the work you showed in this video (as did many others judging by the comments!) And I would be curious to see what kind of stories you come up with in the future and how your skill will develop from there!
Art can be a pain, but ultimately it's all about translating those worlds you build in your mind into reality, and sharing even an imperfect version of that world with other people can be one of the sweetest experiences ever.
I'm not an artist, but this whole notion of "what was originally a mean to an end later becoming an end in itself that makes you unhappy and that you knew all along" is very relatable
wow this is such a beautiful beautiful video. im also autistic doing exactly what you did your second year focusing on allll the different skills (how i ended up on this video) and this was an incredible warning not to get too wrapped up in the technical stuff and keep balance in my life. i just got a scale tattoo to symbolize my love for balance a couple weeks ago i think its the key to this world and this video really really felt like my future self coming back to warn me to have fun with it and focus on that aspect. the way you speak is so similar to the voice inside my head its comforting im so glad you went off that script because i needed to hear that message. youre following your authenticity and being vulnerable and thats an incredible thing, youre SO right about the inherent value if authenticity and i just wanted to leave you a comment thanking your for all of the value its given me today. dont be so hard on yourself clearly youre finding your way and doing what you need to be and your art is absolutely beautiful!!! youre blessed with the skill (and hard work put in) to create this beauty now is the easy and fun part!!! growing the skill of imagination! and i would love to see more videos of the new stories you come up with having all the knowledge you do now. dont hate on the weird version of yourself that used to exist outside of the real world, that is your core and you need to find BALANCE between that person and the person making this video thats come back into the real world and made friends and everything. let them exist in harmony. omg sorry for the dump on your post you just helped me so much i want to do what i can to help you, if this does. just a little encouragement youre doing amazing!!!❤
from an aspiring artist of a little over 2 years, thank you for keeping it real and reminding me to stay true to myself, its a breath of much needed fresh air
this is not a negative comment, or at least that's how I see it
what this video taught me is I need to stop watching specific tutorials and how-to's and guides that all have their own methods and all contradict each other, but more importantly I need to stop trying to motivate myself through other people's experiences. I want to draw for myself, I don't care if it gets popular or not, I might not even post it anywhere, I just want to draw silly little characters and I want to learn anatomy for it. the most common piece of advice I keep hearing is that I wont be burnt out if I have fun and do what I actually enjoy for myself. currently I enjoy my art sometimes when it turns out good but I get annoyed and want to give up (and stop drawing for months) when I spend days on a drawing and it turns out bad, I know what I enjoy, I know what it feels like to be satisfied, but I lack a very important skill to get that feeling more commonly, and learning that skill is something that takes years and is in itself not fun and frustrating - leading to burn out, leading to short 1 week long bursts of desire to learn that end in months of inactivity, over and over again for the past 6 years.
I need to stop watching videos like these first and foremost, what I need to do is draw. nothing else. I need to stop trying to make sense of other people's experiences and instead focus on creating mine. the fact that I keep coming back to trying after every few months despite the amount of times I've "given up" is enough for me to know I want to keep trying. I will not pay attention to what youtube artists tell me I shouldn't do, if it feels right at that moment then I'll do it, and I'll have my own regrets about it years in the future. I genuinely hope I will, I hope I will get to that point in the future where I was actually trying continuously, I don't care if I wasn't learning correctly and I don't care how many ideas I get in the future about how I could have drastically sped up the process and been more efficient. if every artist in the entire world is constantly talking about what they did wrong and what you shouldn't do then who's to say those mistakes weren't necessary, am I really improving more if I go through all of them and make sure to deliberately avoid them in my learning process? can that really be called a learning process?
keep doing what you do, your art is great in many people's eyes, and I hope you some day find a way to make it great in your eyes as well
Yes, go draw! I know you just said that you didn't want advice from youtube, but if you let me recommend you something for you specifically is making a little more quantity of drawing and sacrificing detail also drawing smaller if you draw too big, for me it's all about giving less importance to the drawing (it's not easy, I have struggled). But it's just like going to the gym, if you think all day of what exercises you have to do, that it's leg day and it's going to suck and feel tired and you don't want to go you're never gonna feel good training, it's just about making the best out of situations and saying "My leg is pumping, that means it was a great workout".
I also find myself drawing more this days having an objective, like making a worldbuilding project or a game, the drawings serve the idea, and I make 10 drawings and search 15 articles of engines if I have to to make a cool looking robot, it's about the idea, it's cool to have a pretty drawing but I don't give a shit about that, serve your purpose drawing!
I maybe rambling about , take note that I'm no pro artist but I feel the frustration man and I always try to make the most out of it but it's hardddddd... and the fucking instagram likes are like drugs. Always remember to have a cheap sketchbook and pen (I usually use felt tip pen or ballpoint cause cheap and ink makes you better at line quality) don't take it to seriously, just take a full minute or two to think something and say "isn't that a wacky idea, I can make a few doodles/sketches about it" and you go and let the drawing be the medium for a cool idea, not the cool idea be a medium "cause I have to make a good drawing" or drawing for the sake of drawing (not saying that this isn't fine sometimes, but you're looking for something sustainable, and this is what it works for me). That way you have fun, cause you care about the idea and the learning, not the drawing (I'm re reading this and I feel like I sound kinda crazy with the weird gym analogy, I hope you can get something positive out this or feel free to disagree idk I'm not your mom, you do you, pew pew)
Don't forget that you can also join around some creative communities like gamedevs or better yet worldbuilding artist, *monstergarden server* ahem. It's great to talk to like minded people and get in the mood for drawing wacky shit.
Your honesty and authenticity at the end made me subscribe.
losing your mind and questioning what you're even doing and wanting to want to create is actually an art fundamental so good job keep going!
Very real ending , loved the video. It’s all a process, I better understand that now. Thank you for sharing and being vulnerable.
watching someone have a crisis of faith in the motives of their art in real time is insane and beautiful
What you've accomplished in 3 years is incredible and inspiring. I've been drawing since I was a kid but I lack of a lot of direction in my improvement. This video is incredibly valuable.
hey man, i really enjoyed listening to your journey and seeing your progress. i've been hobby drawing since i was a kid, but with no dedication or real focus, and hearing your struggle and passion and commitment and uncertainty really helped me want to set a more clear path for myself. i really appreciate your authenticity here.
relatable stuff man… especially the last portion of the video
The pressure to stay consistent with the times in the art community really changes a person and I don't think I've taken it as seriously as I should. I mean it seems we all put so much love, tears, time, money into this passion knowing that it may not all be worth it in the end if we can't put our names and artworks out there. And at some point, that passion becomes starts to turn into desperation or guilt. Navigating our way back and maintaining ourselves above water, whilst dealing with the rest of the world is truly a process of its own.
You are not a loser!! No matter if you mean it seriously or jokingly! Great video. Marco Bucci‘s video about edges also changed my art completely
Thank you for showing us this! Theres not many videos showing an artists whole entire learning journey. Its so valuable to have such a well documented learning period.
Great video! I was studying about 3rd point perspective and it was vert entertaining to hear, i hope your dream comes true! And your skeleton with a fire sword drawing was really cool!