Do You Procrastinate MORE Than Most People? Here's What to Do
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 18 ก.พ. 2023
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Getting things done is a HUGE problem for many people, especially with the neurological effects of trauma complicating your ability to focus, to maintain consistent energy levels, and to handle emotional upsets that are bound to happen from time to time. In this "best of" compilation, I share strategies for overcoming procrastination and "action paralysis." Learn how you can overcome limitations from the past and accomplish important goals that make you happy.
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Omg I can’t believe how spot on this is!!!! It’s amazing how much I relate to all of this! Thank you so much Crappy Childhood Fairy for how much you must have to put into these videos. It is so incredibly helpful to others! I don’t think I’ve ever heard someone tick so many boxes of what I go through and I didn’t know that others experience what I experience - in fact quite the opposite because this experience feels extremely isolating and as if the reason I don’t fit in sometimes is because nobody is like me or nobody can relate to me. The fact that I’m not alone in this is very reassuring and gives me hope for my future. Thank you🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼💕💕💕💕💕
Thank you for your kind words! You are certainly not alone, and we are so glad you're here :) -Calista@TeamFairy
This! ... Its comforting to hear that this isnt just a me-thing and feeling so alone ...going through life trying and sometimes having to fight to regulate myself and stay on track ...its not just me.
Feel the exact same way!!!!
I have come soooo far in my healing from narcissistic abuse journey thanks to so many life coaches here.
But when I need to do tough love with myself I come here. You hold my hand and sit with me while I confront all the ugliness I've tried so hard to keep everyone from seeing.
Thank you Anna for the clear explanations you provide that I can resonate with - Clear simple techniques that can slip into our day. Communication and Clarity are new fascinations for me over last few years, and since cutting out Alcohol and Sugary drinks, I feel that my climb towards enlightenment gets easier with every step - I’ve met some great teachers now that I’m prepared to listen and I would hope that my loved ones see me in a better light. I still have a long way to go and goals to achieve, so look forward to many new encounters with people like yourself that will help me on my journey. Thanks for your hard work in overcoming your procrastination, so that we can all benefit from your knowledge in this field. One love ✌🏼💛🙏🏻✨
"this is the most haunting kind of depression..." knowing you are capable of more but trapped by fear. It's so painful.
Yesssssss
The worst part about it is that the fear is not unjustified - but it *must* be overcome regardless. That is the absolute worst thing about it. You know you have every reason to feel it... But, because of the mechanisms behind life, you are *still* wrong to let it overwhelm you. Pah. 'Let.' As if I asked to be subjected to what I was. As if any one of us do.
@@user-bv7ys1st8dbrilliant observation
This is SO true
This was the quote that really hit hard for me.
I've been seeing Psychologists for over 30 years - not one has ever mentioned CTPSD, procrastination issues, limerance, anything of that ilk. I've gotten more from your videos than seeing any of them and I thought they were awesome. I got alot from them but nothing like what I get from you. What's dangerous is therapists that say you're dangerous. If someone is helping someone else that should be encouraged. It helps me immensely when, in the middle of the night, I'm awake, in panic or tremendous sadness, I can just watch one of your videos. You've helped me and you've somewhat saved me. Please don't ever stop. You make a difference. You are important.
We're so glad you are here! Thank you for sharing your kind words towards Anna.
Nika@TeamFairy
"Sometimes we do need to rest, but procrastination doesn't recharge our batteries."
Paralysis is exactly what it is. It's like hanging off the side of a cliff and being terrified to move. I'm just coming out of an episode. Thank you so much for putting a name to it.
I am a licensed therapist/researcher and the perspectives you provide appear to be evidence-based and empirically sound. I recommend your videos to friends/family. Personally, I have found healing and coping skills from your videos. Thank you for the applicable information you provide. Thank you for all you do! :)
Thank you for your comment, and good for you for doing your healing work. After being married to and divorcing a PHD psychologist I can absolutely say that everybody needs therapy
Not being a jerk, stating what seems obvious. There's a lot of narcissists out there. The systems we have are all operant conditioning. Autism is maybe just an irregularly created person they are better at long deep thought processes. Now we have this incredibly harmful system of accepting truths and rules which get shouted with malice and scorn at us. Eventually this causes dysregulation. Also not using the discreet brain functions in the prefrontal cortex, this being the part in which "learns" behaviors instead of memorization is being affected by operant conditioning. Operant conditioning also leads to underdeveloped emotional responses and undeveloped responses to emotions. Eventually we humans are caught in the stress loop, this would shit down prefrontal cortex activity and lead to sedentary and aggressive behavior. Also exhaustion and upholding a way of non thinking and automatically diagnosing others but then not seeing in fact many of us are the Autistic unless we're too good then we're the Autistic with a narcissist filter. These narcissists automatically diagnosing autistics in workplaces, jobs, etc. But don't want their own diagnosis shoved in their faces. Some of us do mature into adults but how do we change if we're simply left with the emotional brain, highly aggressive and territorial, impulsive, who do adopt the better than everyone attitude and question the motives of polite, caring, honest, people with empathy and understanding. Being told everyone is always empathizing with each other but in fact they are simply self reinforcing bad and toxic culture and personal behavior?
Childhood fairy, thank you for your work. I need to improve.
@@jerilynweber1764 someone will support you, only part I find difficult is those in direct vicinity
I too am a psychotherapist ( and an abuse survivor) and I 100% agree that her content is evidence based, empirically sound, AND can be easily understood and applied by the multitudes of quietly walking wounded who desperately need competent care and would otherwise not be able to access it. The wise and Heartfelt understanding , coping strategies and skill development she provides are a Masterful lifeline and balm to many. Thank you so much CCF for your work in the world. May you and your good work be Blessed and continue to flourish. ❤
Procrastination is one of the few things I excel at.
Dear Fairy, I'm 77 and just getting unstuck, thanks to you and your good work. Thank you so so much
That makes me happy! Thank you.
@@CrappyChildhoodFairythis video is really good, and I love your vulnerability. This is exactly how I’m feeling right now: just paralyzed and dreading doing the next right thing that will help me get to the next level in my professional life. God help us.🙏✝️😇 Trying to get back on track!
@BillyG - so proud of you! Keep going!😇
Sending love to you Billy
Thank you for stating your age, I'm 70 this year and for the first time in my life I've been wondering if I'm too old to keep fighting. I know, sounds wussy and I've never been a wuss b4 but you've just given me much needed impetus to keep on going! Thank you 👍✌️😊
❤🙏Oh I hear you I'm same and same thoughts@@sweetpealee056
“Using inaction like a drug.” Bingo. 👌🏽
You got a fist bump and a subscription from this psychiatrist. I love finding good creators spreading well thought out, helpful material that I can point my patients towards since we are remote and the need far outweighs the available professional and layperson mental health providers. This one spoke to me deeply as a chronic procrastinator when stressed.
It's so good for me to see this type of endorsement from another pro. I'm another one exploring possible trusted solutions to my perceived issues while I wait in the NHS counselling que.
That's beautiful to hear that you being a doctor and she's teaching you tools that can help you! 😳🤯 She's amazing at what she does! 🎉
Wow. I had highly religious narcissistic parents. I have never gone to therapy. But all of this makes a lot of sense.
Thank you for all this wonderful advice. You are spot on.
It feels like so many of my friends need to hear your words.
Thank you for sharing.
The best method I've found to stop procrastinating is 1- not to THINK about what I need to get done. Deep inside I already know. 2- Act, one simple SMALL action leads to another then another. And before I know it I've accomplished what I had to get do. Even though in my mind it was this huge responsibility.
For me the TWO hardest thing to overcome is the addiction. That need to fall back into the comfort zone and just isolate. Which really comes from this underlying need of not getting triggered. Then there is the Fear. I grew up "Walking on egg shells" for the first 18 years of my life. It's been a slow journey peeling back this feeling of fear but I have made progress. All going back to learning how to take small steps of action and not let my thinking get in the way.
Same here. ❤️
The One Small Step Method has saved me, too!😃 I love your Step #1. That is VERY useful!
Recently I've become pretty sure there's a very physical component to procrastination, especially when it comes after a bout of Crazy Emotionality... I think our Dopamine loop gets interrupted with Dysregulation, so the reward for doing and accomplishing is missing, which further kills the motivation to get out of our own way. This would explain the Depressed feeling that can take over, which looks like yes to the old diagnostic question: Are you not getting pleasure from doing the things you used to enjoy?
When Serotonin and Dopamine get out of wack, the Push/ Crash Cycle can take me down. To ReRegulate and get moving again on a more even keel if I get into that over my head, I've discovered that an endorphin surge can help me jump start, EXCERSISE is called for, but sometimes I get so raw feeling that just the IDEA of moving out of the cozy, safe, warm bed is painful. Going outside into the natural light and walking around the block One Time can seem absolutely DAUNTING, but it helps SO MUCH!!! May sound goofy but allowing myself to bundle up in lotsa clothes and shades, a hat and or hoodie maybe, helps me feel cosseted, still and usually gets me laughing, which always helps most anything that ails ya!
The Small Step Method has also helped with the paralysis from Real Depression.. Breaking things down into tiny, tiny steps allowed me to stay more fed and up on some hygiene than I'd usually been able to, which helped get beyond the doldrums faster. Yay!!!-
Same for me as well
Small steps. Small small kind mindful steps. We need not mind where ever someone else is on their journey. NEED NOT MIND!!!!!!! No looking. None. MOOB. Thats it. March 1 2 3 .
@@temi4116 That is Awesome wisdom!! Especially since🥀HUGE KEY to really healing is to nix the need for Outside Validation of any sort at all. That has been one of most painful things to learn but absolutely one of the essential parts I missed growing up.
Hi there I am a physician and I really appreciate the work that you’re doing. You’re giving sound advice, actionable steps that actually help people. Thank you very much.
Currently going through this. I'm lost as to how to get back on track
“You can choose to use your attention the way you want.”
“You want the joy from doing the things you have to do.”
Thank you for these.
Thank you for being a part of our community :) -Calista@TeamFairy
I'm a therapist and your channel is amazing! 😊
The fact that you are not a licensed therapist and are still delivering such important useful information is TO YOUR CREDIT.. As an older middle aged person who has spent their entire life living in first tier western world cities, I can say with great confidence that most pyschotherapists I have met, either on a professional basis or in my social millieu are completely full of shit. Thank you for your incisive incredibly genuine and heartfelt perspective. I wish you every success.
Well put. As are so very many in positions of authority. Question everything and value your own beautiful intuition ❤
Full of shit is right. Also, most therapists seem less self aware than their clients!
Here we go, agreed, same, i did the path, more than 30 years, and learn more for healing with people like you than so called doctors or therapists. Done! #Gratitude Go Fairy Go🧚
100%......only book knowledge, no real experience and knowledge.
Once I said to a therapist that I wished that no one had to suffer so much emotionally in this world .
Her response very much surprised me. She said she didn't because then she'd be out of a job 😮
Please don’t let the haters win. You are the voice in the dessert of psychotherapy BS calling the seekers who know truth when they hear it. Thank you thank you thank you.
“Stepping forward into my small part” is what people need to do. I am a licensed therapist and everything you say is on point. What matters is you are helping a lot of people. Your stories about your childhood and what you are doing today makes you relatable and effective.
Anna I am a Psychiatric Mental Health Nurse Practitioner, and Family Nurse Practitioner, I have been certified as a master psycho-pharmacologist, all that being said I just wanted to thank you for all you do with this channel! I have adhd and cptsd and in my professional and personal, opinion your channel is a valuable resource for me and my patients
Thank you for telling me this. It means a lot!
I really thought Anna, was a professional at 1st, because she has a lot of insightful knowledge and professional quality.
@@CrappyChildhoodFairyI had to smile when you spoke of the “professional “ that had shade to throw your way for, gosh, don’t really understand for what 😝 But as someone who’s had an extremely f*cked up childhood, I’ve gotta say - a”therapist” like that’n would not inspire my trust.
You, on the other hand, do. Your sincerity and absence of self-aggrandizement incites me to want to listen to what you have to say about life & strategies for living it. I thank you. 🙏🏼🌹
Thank you!!❤
Seeing you deal with criticism helps me know it can be done well. And realistically saying it still hurts makes us know it’s ok to hurt and be human from cruel people but that we don’t have to stay there. Thank you for doing these videos although you put yourself out there and open yourself to ugly people. You are helping way more people. But hey those haters are still watching your videos so maybe they have had crappy childhoods and are reacting to you so they don’t have to deal with their crap. Just a thought. They are still contributing to the views on your page so that’s good. :D
I am 65 and found your channel last year. That was the first time i began to understand my emotional reactions and where they come from. No therapist have ever explored (or identified) my disregulation or its origin. You are so valuable to so many of us and hopefully a good educational resource for therapists - like the hater therapist- who do not understand this condition.
I'm so happy to hear that the channel has been helpful, thank you for taking the time to comment! -Calista@TeamFairy
Exactly
I'm 57, and right there on the journey with you!
I'm almost 59 Lotte. You are not alone! I've also learned more from this channel than from therapists.
I’m 65 too, and I wish I’d had Anna years ago but better late than never! 😂 it helps me stop beating myself up with shame over some of the idiotic things I did to make my life so much harder than it had to be.
And Anna, you are so lovely and helpful to so many people ❤️big Hugs❤
I'm licensed in Health Science and my area of best expertise for educating and coaching is in mental health and developmental psych. In my opinion, I hear accurate wholesome skill building. You're an amazingly talented speaker on the subject and all the related complexities! Please carry on! Many of us are grateful to be able to check-in with you to return to a state that helps us find our feet. And our sacred centered mind of our heart. Thank you from that place. God bless you! 😊
Thank you for your kind words! -Calista@TeamFairy
You have changed my life, you have helped me in sooo many ways! Pls, pls continue!
This is what I am working through right now. I’ve been healing from trauma for the last 2+ years. I have better focus now but the procrastination and overwhelm is something I’m still working through and healing. It feels so frustrating to know I am capable of more but the disregulation and fear can make it feel like the scariest thing ever! I have come so far and I will keep going !
We understand as few others can. You got this :) -Calista@TeamFairy
I’ve learned more about CPTSD from your videos than from any of the many therapists I came across in the past. Thank you for putting yourself out there for the broken people so that they can mend.
Your therapist isn’t there to teach you about what it’s like to live with cPTSD. Only a fellow person like CCF can do that who has also experience it.
That therapist from Indiana is jealous. She needs to back off. It’s none of her business what we need to hear. Anyone just changes video if they don’t like it.
I agree. You’ve helped me tremendously over the last 3 years? Thank you so very much!
I’ve heard a lot of talk of recent that they want to silence TH-camrs who aren’t “credentialed.” I think it’s so wrong and affects culture in a terrible way. The best wisdom comes from blue collar and from credentialed people who have been through things first hand and healed. bell hooks talks about how feminism has been devastated in principle and efficacy by academia co-opting a blue collar movement. They take over movements, even psychology for ruling class agenda. I’m so grateful for blue collar/first hand wisdom-it’s different, it’s better and way more healing ☀️
Same here. I am in therapy, but learn more about myself and how to heal from watching her videos.
Not all therapists are equal...
Therapists are 'human beings' as well & they may have their own biases & experiences that influence perception... AND how they see events. This one appears obsessed with criticism and 'hierarchy', over healing.
These videos are fantastic, they really free you, the insight is incredible...they are gold.
(Three months later, this video is old, but could not resist adding to sentiments above...!) 🤔🤨🤗
Please don’t ever let those nutzos discourage you from making these videos because they tremendously help me and make me feel validated and encourage me and inform me. I love you and you are beautiful! Keep going! Thank you for the work you put in for our benefit
Yes!!!!!!
Thank you for your kind words! I'm so glad the videos have been helpful :) -Calista@TeamFairy
I agree!
Right on Ashley!!!!!!!!
Oh I can’t thank you enough for your videos!!! I’m 59 years old, married for 39 years, 3 married children and 3 grandchildren. Because of over 30 years of continuous emotional, psychological, physical, and spiritual abuse , I’ve spent most of my life disregulated and in a self destructive state, and therefore emotionally unstable in all my relationships with these people I love dearly. You are one of the 3 people who have actually given me the necessary information, insight and tools to begin changing my entire world. And as I’m healing, my husband is finally seeing the horrific part he played in multiple areas where he continued to use my childhood abuse to his benefit for over 25 years. We are both learning, healing, changing and I am so grateful for you and the other two people who are truly helping get to the truth. ❤️❤️❤️❤️
You give it a name to what is happening to me. Dis-regulated. I’ve been fighting these feelings most of my life. Thank you so much. It helps me to understand myself. I’m 70 years old and still struggling to understand myself. I wish to live the rest of my life with happiness and peace. It’s like your teachings were sent from above.
I read a quote online that said something like "People will hate you, people will love you, and it will have nothing to do with you." When someone says something hateful or hurtful, it has more to do with them than with you. I find your videos helpful and healing. Thank you for all the effort you put in. You are doing a good work and you are reaching many people.
That’s really helpful, I like that quote. Thank you!
@@ramonaharter6407 I think what that quote means when people hate without reason. You obviously have an excellent reason.
My life has been a search for sanity since I became aware of my damaged body mind and emotions evolving from long term abuse. I have watched your videos before but this one has helped me so much. Thankyou!!!
Glad you are here!
Nika@TeamFairy
You have given a new dimension to my life. Been struggling with mental health issues for more than 15 years. Recently at 41 I got diagnosed with adult ADHD and it kind of makes sense. I'm on medication to help me with it, but it hasn't helped me to regulate my self as I wish to. My procrastination is ruining my life. After bumping to your videos, it makes me feels that I'm actually suffering from CPTSD and severe dysregulation. So I'm on a quest to reregulate my self. I'm so glad that i came across your videos. all the best to your great work.
I noticed that doing something, even an easy thing, is making me feel better 70 to 100% ! Everytime I do yoga, or talking a walk, helps a lot. I've been painting and doing air dry clay, it has been soooo calming and uplifting. I finally realized I need to do things with my hands. It's a great thing to do to get out of a negative loop.
I love that. I paint too. I'm so glad you have ways of re-regulate.
Great job!
-Cara@TeamFairy
@@lisacurtis8162 art can really be therapeutic in that way
Hi Aurora! Nice to see you here. Luv ya!
This is very very true for me as well.
Bless your heart for being so honest. I AM a therapist with an outpatient practice and i cannot STAND that a therapist is so cruel to you. I have found you quite recently, after a 30 year practice, and i truly LOVE what you teach. I have known for decades that i learn more from the people LIVING with shit (like schizophrenia, or gee... C-PTSD) than I (usually) learn from the "experts."
So thank you for getting back out there and doing it again even though it is a lot worse than "HARD."
It is excrutiating.
Amazing comment... this is exactly what I look for in a therapist. I tried asking my current psychologist a question like this... "learning new things from clients" or always putting everything into a box from something I've learned out of a book? I tried very hard to word it properly as to not cause offense but this was actually my way of establishing more trust. I thought I'd come to a level to be able to share more experiences I felt she should know but wanted to know her ideas on some things first. It didn't go well & altho I am still with her, it made me see her differently tbh & the admiration is different indeed. I took a break for awhile. I've learned that therapists have a honey moon period while they're learning u esp if they are private practices (expensive); also some know that nowadays the pool of good mental health professionals is not deep at all. They can take advantage too unfortunately.!
I am new here. Could you tell mme what C-ptsd is? I know Ptsd.
Oh , I see childhood ptsd.
Yes, excruciating!
Experience is an effective teaching experience, if not pleasant or necessarily quit.❤❤❤
For me this procrastinating has me being like a split personality. I work and produce in my out time to help my job and other people do well. But I can't get myself back on track when I am handling my own life so the lay down was going on and on forever. Yes check out was for me reading fantasy, watching a movie, shopping that created a clutter mountain and finding you has been a God send. You matter so much to my healing.
Thank you for this because you are AWESOME and this community you are bringing together to talk openly about this is needed. I need you. So thank you for being right on time showing up at a time when being able to do this re entry into the world as a whole person is what I am trying to do.
Same!! Help others and things for work get all my energy (and even then action paralysis), and I have little to no energy for my own personal tasks and self care.
You have helped me so much more than sooooo many therapists. Being in recovery from a terrible fentanyl addiction I’m a big believer in one person who’s been through something helping another. It’s so powerful.
Been off the tracks for months now.
don't stop trying 💞 and trying new tries
You'll get there!
-Cara@TeamFairy
It's been years 4 me thus video is so helpful
Bringing in some encouragement for anyone with action paralysis. I got past it today. I got medical treatment, took out the trash and bought groceries today. Before I left the house, I felt like I was dying, but I knew that the "I'm dying" feeling doesn't go away when you avoid it. It waits for you. I had a great day after getting my basic needs taken care of. I consider myself fortunate, in a way. People without avoidant behavior have no idea the euphoria of conquering that fear; it's like winning a piece of my personhood back- a special gift for avoidant people like myself. Thanks Fairy, for exposing the correlation between trauma and avoidance.
Good for you ! Great insight. Medical help? Do u mean pharma? Recent switch to effexor isn't working. Any experience you can share welcomed. !
Congratulations! Keep up conquering your issues!
Dont mind negative comments.. ive spent my adult life trying to find out what was "wrong" with me and i cannot afford therapy. Your channel has helped me understand so much ao it has given me motivation to try again in life and this time not give up. Thank you so much. Dont let haters influence you at all! You are a great help. Please dont stop ever
I love your channel, and i listen to u every day. Marissa Peer calls herself, "the therapist's therapist," and she did not graduate from college. She, like u, helps 1000's and possibly millions of ppl. I have had 4 therapists, and none of them addressed my cptsd. You and Tim Fletcher are the most amazing ppl who have put me on the path to REAL healing. Mahalo nui loa.❤
Thank you for your kind words towards Anna. We're glad you are here!
Nika@TeamFairy
~♡~Anna, we are now in an age, where 'professionals', and 'licensed experts' are no longer the best help, or have the best advice~These industries have become too corrupt~You are an absolute gem!!!~Ive found the same true of medical doctors, and the best advice i get are from people who are not restricted by their industry, just like you would be if you were 'licensed'~You are helping far more by being outside of that system!!!~♡~
That's a great point, thank you!
-Cara@TeamFairy
They never were it's a vampire industry.
This is the truth! Thank you.
Yes the system itself is for profit… and to get what they want, they have to have control… they have to have labels of authority that make it wrong to even question. The system itself is broken because of the profit motive-and just like all broken systems, there are good people within it. Some are corrupted by the system, and some come to see the toxicity and that even their training was designed not around health but a profit/control motive. People are wrong to blindly trust authority… even the Nazis FIRST “solution” before they implemented their “Final” was to use the structure of the excellent social medicine system to murder the disabled… starting with children and then adults… the first gas chambers were built inside the hospitals. There are many documentaries here on TH-cam about it. The foundation of eugenics is greed. The ruling class who were funding Hitler didn’t want the tax money to go to the people (in this case the disabled), they wanted it in their pockets. Some things never change. People need to be on alert to not blindly trust any authority. I don’t think labels belong in front of names despite training. There’s a reason so many priests molest, officers do wrong and doctors harm people… these are all people with authority because of label. And to guard our future, people need to understand that there will never be a eugenics/genocide that looks like WW2 again. The tools of tyranny are 10,000 fold last century (bio weapons, social engineering/propaganda/technology/data/ai/surveillance) and the people at the top cap are the same as centuries before. Last century, 100 million people were killed by their own governments across the planet. :( We need systems that raise the wise and the loving to the top. Right now, we’ve got the opposite. It’s the coldest and most greedy guiding the destiny of humanity. Intelligence is a neutral quality to say the least! It can be used for terrible things without Love!
@@juneelle370 ~Youre right, there may never be a genocide that looks like WW2 again, but there is a genocide going on that doesnt look like WW2~
I admit I used inaction as a way to rebel against my mother who berated me for not being obedient to her. Perhaps I have gotten too comfortable being rebellious: thus, my self-regulation is underdeveloped. I admit that I procrastinate when I'm in a dysregulated state. Thank you, Anna, for sharing this concept of dysregulation in CPST, for this is my first time hearing about it.
Thank you so much for reaching out and sharing!
-Cara@TeamFairy
Me too! Same exact thing.
Same thing happened with my mother and I. Totally get you.
Hmm your mom sounds like my mom... I never looked at it that way 🥳 ty
Exactly... my unconscious response to my mother was 'your cruelty will not make me do what you want.'
“Your attention can be a bag of cats” l😂😂😂😂😂😂 that was the most relatable thing I’ve ever read in my life.
Please, do NOT stop what you do no matter what negative comments you get. PLEASE🙏. Your honesty and insights on all these issues so many of deal with are very, very , very helpful to us who’ve spent all our adult life trying to figure out solutions. I am one of those people. I’ve spent tens of thousands of dollars if not hundreds in the last 30 years of my adult life trying to get to the bottom of what you are talking to us about. You are a blessing to me, and I am certain I am not the only one ( and I’m saying this without reading any of the other comments). THANK YOU for what you do 🙏
Thank you for your kind words towards Anna! We appreciate them!
Nika@TeamFairy
I’ll be 70 this year and it seems more and more I’m stuck in this patter of “procrastination “. I tend to miss a meeting, stay home, binge Netflix…it’s SO comfortable and easy. When I’m out in the world I feel so judged. I think I’m an empathic person and know that I can read people and they don’t like me.
I think I understand those feelings. I'm at that age myself as well. Just keep listening to Anna... sometimes I listen to the same video over and over... till I own it. You are in the right place for healing, even if you've felt so alone with all this for years. 🌟🦋
Every piece of understanding of yourself that you absorb here will change your life for the better... and that feels sooo good!
i don't know how a 'therapist" could ever say you're doing harm. It makes me angry and I'm glad you're able to just keep going because you probably can't even imagine the amount of comfort or understanding you've provided. Makes me really question how good this "therapist" is in their own practice. I'm finally understanding my behavior from listening to your videos. It's made me really think about my life and what I can do to help myself. How can that be wrong?
You’re very kind. I’ll make sure Anna reads your note.
-Cara@TeamFairy
Don't listen to so-called 'experts'. You are saving my sanity with your words! I am an artist / musician in my late middle age who didn't realise that I suffered from CPTSD until recently.
I self-sabotaged opportunities all my life, and still do retreat from things instead of persisting.
Your channel and what you share with us makes 100% sense in a world that judges in ignorance. Thankyou ❤
Btw: I love that music at the end of your videos - what is that?
You're a beautiful human being. Something about you reminds me of GG Allin. Maybe its because you're an incredible person, who believes in themselves.
I’ve never been in the position where I’m connecting with people, enjoying work, being productive, and keeping my living space clean.
😂 I thought the same thing. I love this channel and get so much from the videos but I zoom in on that one point and not being perfect😬
Anna can help!
It's never too late to grow into your best self! And it feels so good to know you are better, and you are gaining ground and will never lose ground, just get better and better!
You are amazing!!! I never suffered childhood trauma from my parents, but My dad teased me about my looks, and kids bullied me. Never thought I had PTSD, but definitely suffered low-self esteem, was a high achieving procrastinator, but now it’s out of control. I may lose my home for not getting anything done, but working a high paying full-time job.
Everything u said resonates. I get temporary comfort in my procrastination, thinking I’ll get enough rest to “geterdone” It’s too far gone at this point. Regular vids on procrastination never got this deep. You are really speaking to my soul. Imposter syndrome, extreme fear of failure, criticism, overwhelming helplessness. You understand. 😢😨
Ooph... I hope you're doing better today. I feel your pain. Someone who has really helped me start to get things done is Dana K. White A Slob Comes Clean and her 5 step system. Great little videos and she's just a super person.
Totally understand the struggle, as I work to heal from CPTSD. May you find the strength and dedication to get-er-done! 🙏🎯 Good luck and bless you!
That 3 a.m. sense of the world passing me by.. is basically my nightly life experience. Except that now, at 55, it pretty much HAS. I'm a shambles, career-wise, and I'm a failure as a provider. Nowadays I ruminate over how I'll ever earn enough to look after myself or spouse when I'm old. How did my life just wither like this?😳
@@slippo99 Hang in there! Do the Daily Practice! You will recover! Keep listening to Anna. It is never too late!
@@slippo99I just saw your comment. Oh my goodness, I turn 55 the first of Dec and I am in the same place, like …I’ve already let too much time go by for me to come back. I’m so scared and angry and frustrated with myself that I make it all worse . I just want to die sometimes to get away from having to face myself
“You will never reach your destination if you stop and throw stones at every dog that barks.” - Winston Churchill
Your content is very helpful.
Dang, you've explained in a direct and considerate way what I didn't glean so well in 25 years of intermittent counseling and growth and crash n burns. WOW. Thank you so tremendously for being brave and reaching out Sister. You're Saving and changing lives. Don't doubt it for a second ❤❤please. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!
I’m sure Anna will want to read this. Thanks for taking the time to comment.
-The Fairy Team
@@CrappyChildhoodFairy Aw, I thought you were her.
I have been “out” for the last couple of weeks and feeling so awful about it. Thanks for this video!
Also, I’ve been retraumatized by professionals many times, so being a licensed therapist doesn’t mean crap to me. Keep up your amazing work!!! You are helping us heal.
Yeah I understand, a psychiatrist who was friends with my parents and who I was seeing privately when I was 17, turned on me and wrote my parents telling them everything I’d told her. What a massive betrayal. I left home soon after.
@@libbylandscape3560 Wow, that is a terrible violation. I am so sorry that happened to you.
Anna, you stun me. This is *so good, so helpful*. I've been frozen, and you have been helping me become unstuck and come alive. Fears?? I've been immobilized, self-attacking, suicidal. And you are helping. I can't thank you enough. ♥️♥️♥️♥️
Im rooting for you Judith ❤
The therapist who judges you is just trying to stay relevant. Your videos have helped me, and I appreciate what you do. Thank you!!
This woman did so much for me without knowing it. Developed cptsd and was lost for 2 years despite try Harding daily. Finally understood what happened and how to heal from watching a video of her.
Despite reading many books on it
I'm so glad that you are feeling the Fairy love :)
-Cara@TeamFairy
Which video if I may ask? Thanks.
There was a scientific paper that came out awhile ago discussing the myth of "chemical imbalance ". It was always just a theory and has never been proven. Thats why shows like yours are important because these issues we have need to be worked through, not "medicated". Its upsetting more people are not aware of this but thats the power big pharma holds over our reality.
This is a lifesaver. I am over 50 yrs and found plenty of articles about my problems but now there is not only a name for it but a guide to get out. This method would safe sooo many marriages and prevent bad ones. Dysregulation and trigger is the whole thing. Now , I am sooo greatful for this channel and the courses. i've gone my whole life being constantly disregulated and triggered , spending the few years in isolation from everyone and had menopause too and didn´t realize the mental and emotional factor of it. That is like disregulation on steroids. I have been so alone , so lonely , so sad and so unhappy for most of my life and not understanding how to fix it. Also living in Scandinavia where it is cold and dark. This is the way out. Thank you , thank you. This a guide for me to have a happy life. I am already signed up for a course.
Thank you so much for sharing the power of your experience!
Me and my siblings are split asunder by the trauma we lived through at home. I am the unmarried and childless sibling and I find life very lonely too at times. It’s devestating having no parents (both dead) and siblings who are so shutdown that they don’t bother to stay in touch. Nobody would wish to be so alone in life. I understand how lonely it can be. It is sad, very sad. I will find a way out of this place too though. Please god.
I'm 54 and floored that there is a name to my issue and that others are either going through the same thing or something similar. I've been in menopause for a few years and just feel like a shell of myself. Things have been getting worse because now I have a hard time remembering things. I feel like I'm going in circles.
The calmness , the authenticity.. it's like a calm river of information washing over my soul that helps me understand my dysregulation and understand the impacts of childhood abuse into adult life. Thank you so much for your effort AND for putting out tools for FREE And accessible to all. You are an inspiration Fairy!
"Have you ever had the experience you're doing great in life..."
I'm gonna stop you right there.
I don’t have any childhood experiences that I would consider trauma, but you completely and fully described the one thing I’ve struggled with my whole life-the triggers, symptoms, feelings, thoughts, everything. Thank you for covering this topic.
Please don’t pay attention to the comments. The internet is filled with aimless hate. No matter who you are or what you do there will be people who want to hurt you and make you feel broken, dread, and self-hatred. Most people can’t face their own reality and reject hearing the truth or anything that resonates with their situation in a way that would make them feel accountability for their own issues, so they lash out and try to destroy the person making them feel this way.
Watching this video while procrastinating 🥹😂. Thank you, Anna. You’re proof of the impact people can make in this world when you embrace healing. ❤️🩹
It's already 10am and I'm still laying in bed listening to this trying to regulate on my FN RDO. I find you so caring and soothing to listen to, like a warm hug.
I only came across you on YT a couple weeks ago. You've helped me immensely. I have never heard anyone talk so consisely about the stuff I'm going through as you do.
You help me not feel alone. Thank you ❤
You certainly aren't alone and we're so glad you're here :) -Calista@TeamFairy
If I could get up at 10am, I would honestly feel so proud 😌 but then I procrastinate going to bed too.
I wish you all the best 🙌
"Have you ever had the experience where you're doing great in life?" - No.
And I don't have extra hour and a half to listen to the things that I could hardly apply
I just considered that the Mr. Rogers of our childhoods may be compared to now and how the younger generations now are drawn to these asmr or slow living videos.
Thank you for all you do, Anna. I’m a psychologist and we need people like you. We all need to share our stories including what we’ve learned from our wounds. Especially what we’ve learned from our wounds. “There is a crack in everything. That’s where the light comes in.”
Wahoo Leonard Cohen is the bomb and so is Anna!! We love you sister! You're inspiring me to start my own channel/podcast. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I've been watching your channel since the beginning and your presentation has gotten better and better. I'm so on the same page as you. Hugs!!!
One of the best ways to snap me out of paralysis or procrastination is something physical. My two recent techniques are finishing off a shower set to cold for 1 minute, or going for a run or walk in the woods. You have a great channel!
Thanks for sharing these ideas! I'm so glad you're enjoying the channel. -Calista@TeamFairy
I'm not at all surprised that a psychologist criticizes you because of your teaching People regain power over their lives and stop being his clients. I'm very grateful for your videos and all the wisdom you are sharing with me. 🙏
I've had EMDR and cognitive talk therapy for my CPTSD, with a professional therapist. I've also spent thousands of hours following assorted TH-cam creators that specialize in trauma/narcissistic abuse. I'm new to your content, and it's already clear that you are well-informed and well-intentioned. Your style is direct, kind, clear and full of insight. It's especially helpful to me, as I have a strong analytical tendency and feel more trust and confidence when a methodology makes sense to me. I've known for a while that I need more body- centered work than ties my intellect with my relationship with my body. I'm looking forward to using your tools!
Thank you for all the work you offer so generously and gently. ❤qxm
"Two disregulated people will often escalate." You just described my relationship perfectly. I've fallen out of practice. Thanks for the reminder to not engage and take time for myself.
Omg! This explains it . I thought I had ADHD but I don’t . What I have is my CPTSD activated. I usually feel a feeling of floating in the air . I loose concentration, and forget what’s the next step to take. By the time I finish trying to regulate myself , I can barely accomplish a few things. Most of time goes into sorting out my emotions, journaling , cleaning and doing what I can to ground myself ! Thank you for making this video.
Please keep doing this great work. Thank you
Whether anyone ever wants to admit it or not there are those that live right beside you that are not on the same page that don't care about the success of the human race
I am pretty new to trying to fix myself. Not due to procrastination, just a feeling that at 57 I'm to old to fix.
I know this is not true but I am procrastinating watching this video in its entirety.
Sometimes it's not really procrastination as much as it is imput overlaod.
Some days you do just have to take down time. If you're not ready to hear or face something about yourself you're going to miss hearing the message that helps you.
Cheers to everyone trying to make your lives better... we're a work in progress that can't be rushed or you may wind up in the weeds and not all Google maps lead to a good way out like this channel does.
Anna's CPTSD GPS- love this metaphor!
-Cara@TeamFairy
@Barbara Boix same exactly. Anna describes and understands so well, I feel so validated.
I'm 57, and right there on the journey with you!
Notme2day
OMG! NEVER too old. Go for it girl! After age eighty, drastically changed diet, dropped fifty lbs along the way, dumped all med except thyroid med, dumped 99% process foods, dumped my vodka (sigh) dumped fibromyalgia along the way and began walking again. Now yrs later….sticking to same routine. Felt I was running out of time!😊 50 is young!
Wow, after decades have passed I've finally understood why I'm behaving this way. This is just the start for me.I didn't even know what disregulation was but the symptoms are 100% correct. Thank you so much.x
You are so welcome! Glad you're here :) -Calista@TeamFairy
Just adding another kind comment to say that you’ve helped me tremendously in my recovery path. I love how you give tough love and also put into words what is going on inside us.
So thankful you’ve chosen this path. We appreciate you getting up and turning on the lights and btw your hair is perfect.
Thank you
Thank you so much for your help.
Please don’t ever let the “Haters” stop you from doing the great work you are doing for so many! Your wisdom and advice is so good and spot on much better than an any so called professional I’ve ever encountered! Your courage in stepping forward and sharing your experiences and hard earned wisdom is admirable! Never stop! You deserve a Gold metal for your kindness, wisdom and efforts to help others heal! God bless you!! ❤
PLEASE NEVER Stop sharing your knowledge on your youtube channel !!! I am learning and healing so much from your experience and knowledge and teachings. And the love and warmth in which you share everything!!! I am so grateful for you and that I found your channel. I have hope now and know I can heal thanks to you Anna!!
Thank you.❤
Thank you for all you do! Your videos have helped me a lot! ❤
This 100% hits the nail on the head with one of my biggest CPTSD symptoms as an adult. Thank you Anna, for addressing what so many of us survivors can't seem to get properly addressed through conventional therapy. Anyone who criticises you is threatened by the fact that you are doing what they simply can't do. Instead, they should be inviting you onto their forums to help educate them on how they can better serve their clients. Keep doing what you're doing!👏❤️
Insightful and well said.
Sounds like somebody's met my former PHD therapist. 😒
I have spent decades reading or listening to self-help books, tapes, and videos, and while I've taken away bits of wisdom from these sources, I have found your videos to be the most helpful. Your ability to articulate ideas and insights is exceptional. You are helping me and it's obvious by the comments section that you are helping many others as well. As for negative comments, we are living in an era in which it has become 'permissible' to be hateful and bullying - at least among the weak in spirit. Hopefully on some level, the wisdom you impart will get through to them as well.
The encouragement is really appreciated, thanks for being part of the community
-Cara@TeamFairy
What she said.
I 100% agree. Me too. Decades (I'm 62). I have just been thinking that I wish the internet/TH-cam, etc. had been available a LONG time ago. If I could have had Anna's teaching much younger my life would be different/better now than it is. I wish I could afford more of her courses and such. Anna has taught me the most and helped me the most even at this late stage with my CPTSD FAR more than therapists or any books that, like you, I have read many and gleaned bits hear and there but Anna is GOLD. @TheCrappyChildhoodFairy
@@jenne8180 Snap! How different my life would have been, if I had been able to access her compassion, insight, humor, wisdom, guidance .. I’m 70 and only just found her😢
@@jgfreer8322 ❤
I can relate with you so much!
Gee Wizz Lady, you must be inside my soul...
I was ontrack for years, had overcome so much adversity and gotten myself independent and stacking good days ontop of good days, I thought I had my life under control, had a solid schedule, work was great, was working out, riding my bike, shooting the rock, walking.
Had gotten away from many bad habits that I had gravitated to as a child to self medicate...
I was even working throughout the covid pandemic, then all the sticks hit the fan at the same time...
Job layoff, then seriously injured my shoulder and had to have surgery, since then I can honestly say I'm completely disregulated and have been trying to understand myself.
I've lost motivation, drive, interest, focus, desire I feel like I've been punched in the gut, and can't get my air back...
Although I haven't fell back into alchohol, drugs or smoking.
I did start eating bad and put on weight wich is really bad.
I'm not being productive, not walking, not living life at all.
I want to get back to normal desperately.
The injury really overwhelmed.
Sorry this is so long...
Thx for your content I just ran into it!
Girl, don’t you let them FOOLS keep you from helping others. I’ll be the first one to tell you from having mental symptoms/irregularities and working in mental health …you’re a very big asset to others and I consider these videos a wonderful tool to utilize and meditate on. !!!!
thank you
Wow, you are so wise. Thank you!
I feel so very blessed when people like you come forth out of trauma to help others. Thank you, Anna!
Thank you for your kind words! Glad you're here :) -Calista@TeamFairy
Same. 🙏🏽
My mother is in the er and this talk has really calmed me down: I'm so grateful to you. My mind is going everywhere and I only recently realized I've been emotionally disregulated this entire time. My relationship with my mom was where the cptsd began, and her being hospitalized is a form of panic and disregulation I've yet to know. She is stable now. Listening to you while packing and it's the only thing that's calming me down while I try to take one step at a time. My sister has said some awful things in all this and I'm trying to keep my head straight and get a ticket and on a plane. Thank you, Anna, for everything. ❤️
You're in it right now, that's for sure. Keep me and this loving community with you!
@@CrappyChildhoodFairy 💕❤️💜
I am grateful that you won't succumb to the jealous therapist hyperfixating on you. Thank you for caring about us more than evil people. You save lives ❤.
Thank you for taking the time to make these videos. You’re making a difference. ❤ I appreciate you.
You are the only person who's accurately identified the problems I've been struggling with. One of my modes of withdrawing is only ever watching short videos. But I love you and what you're doing so much, and I'm so disgusted by the idea of mean bullies trying to upset you that I'm going to a) leave every ad to play in its entirety and b) watch your whole video WITH PLEASURE.
I'm so glad the channel has been helpful, thank you for sharing! -Calista@TeamFairy
Me too!!!!! All this time not one of the "therapists " ever even came close.. the psychiatrists just wanted to put me on horrible meds.
Amen.
The COVID restrictions really triggered me and put me in a prolonged state of utter isolation as I live with sensory disabilities and zoom is very hard for me to follow. I am finding this video really timely, because I am finding it really hard to re-establish social connections and "out' routines and as much as I find the loneliness really painful, I am also finding myself avoiding the opportunities that come my way. I am feeling very trapped in this conflict. So, I really appreciate this video and the advice that you are offering on what works for you.. Thank you Anna!
I hear you, reestablishing social connections can be very difficult. If you're interested, Anna offers a course on healing loneliness and building stronger connections, it sounds like a great fit for you. Here's the link if you want to check it out: bit.ly/CCF_Connection
Sending you encouragement! -Calista@TeamFairy
@@CrappyChildhoodFairy
Respectfully, IF I'm reading their post correctly they didn't slip into loneliness..... it's markedly different.
Yes! It is a relief to hear someone else describing something akin to what I'm experiencing from the pandemic.
While I found an online community 3 months into my county's lockdown and haven't experienced loneliness since, I'm having a terrible time re-establishing "out" connections and routines. I panic every time I leave my house, except for grocery shopping, which I continued during lockdown since it was permitted. I have finally recognized how debilitating this isolation is, and I am reaching out for professional help. I need to check the chronic insomnia I'm experiencing first before I can keep an appointment, I slept through my first attempt despite having set two alarms. The state I am in feels totally daunting to unravel, but I am determined to claw myself out of this pit. I will not quit on myself.
@@LauraJeanBabbitt Online "communities" are no substitute for real relationships.
@@SirenaSpadesWhile in lock down that was the best we could have. 😢
There's NOTHING wrong with coaching people with cptsd, etc. In fact, it's helpful to have compassionate, actionable advice. Keep doing what you're doing!
Thank you for your kind words! -Calista@TeamFairy
You are an inspiration, thank you so much !
My only avenue for healing just came in this video. I went through what u did - all of a sudden I was no longer functional at 37. You gave me new life from your sharing. I’ve listened to so many of your videos…PLEASE continue to make videos. You, everything about you, is how this information is helping people ❤
Much like the story Anna tells, I didn't realize this was me until a horrible series of events re-ignited all the fear, abandonment, and resentment I felt from childhood. I've been rebellious and independent to a fault, often to my own detriment, to prevent ANYONE from having ANY kind of control over me again. Ugh! Time to clean it up! Many thanks -- 💞💜🐙
It's really great you have this level of self-awareness, that's the first step to healing! Sending you encouragement :) -Calista@TeamFairy
I was thinking to myself how thankful I am that I found your channel, and then you started sharing about all the naysayers. With social media platforms, it’s too easy to criticize or give our “honest” opinion without realizing there are still consequences. The way we judge or criticize others is how we end up criticizing and judging ourselves with our inner monologue. I try to remind myself to love and be kind to myself by also being kind to others - whether my words are written or it’s a face to face conversation. Where I struggle most is how I talk about others when they are not present - same thing though, I try to remind myself to be kind and not so quick to judge.
It's wild to see the evolution of your production throughout the videos in the procrastination compilation.. Keep up the good work.
I understand about these laptop bullies attacking because they are jealous that they aren't living their purpose. Girl KEEP GOING! I never heard anyone literally "read" my life and confirm to me that I'm not crazy. I watched the first video I saw of yours (about limerence)and it answered a lifetime of questions. I watch these videos almost daily because the truths you share has brought me back to a level of reality I haven't lived in for decades. I'm in my 60's.
Thank you for your kind words! I'm so glad the channel has been helpful :) -Calista@TeamFairy
Young Lady, you are a Rock Star to so many!
Your bravery and honesty are as valuable and scarce as hens teeth!!
Your videos have been MONUMENTAL in my personal journey in understanding the "why" I am/have been for these past 60+ years.
Nay sayers be damned!
Please continue to share your passion.
Thank You 😎
"young lady"... hugs for that!
I just wish this info had been available decades ago.
Jeff, I haven't heard that saying "scarce as hens teeth" in a long long time. Love it and I agree with you 100%!
Well said! @ Jeff 👍
Thank you for sharing your gentle spirit, what a lovely and kind message to share with the world ❤
You are amazing, thank you for sharing your wisdom ❤️