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How to get any MAN you WANT: the MASTER KEY
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 5 ส.ค. 2024
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Due to popular demand, this is the first episode in a three-part series on how women can get any man they want -- even if they are not exceptionally attractive. Men are not complicated. To secure a relationship with any man they have direct access to, women only need to do two things (and not do one thing). This episode is about the first thing, the Master Key. The secret to getting a relationship with a man is being useful. Women need to make men's lives easier and better in order to secure a commitment. The trick is to insinuate themselves so completely into the day-to-day operation of a man's life that it would next to impossible to extricate them from it.
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Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world.
#psychology #dating #relationship
As a woman, I experienced the exact opposite. The more I care and give, the less I am appreciated in the relationship
Being desperate and needy is different from being insightfully helpful and useful
It's not how much you give, and not what YOU care about. It's what help and use he needs, if you can find it, you can tap into what bonds him to you.
Here is a big clue: Find out what stresses him out, make a list, keep it updated, then get cracking on your creativity, connection, consistency and do what you can too help him problem solve WITHOUT taking credit away from him.
@@joshg854I mean, that's not the only reason. We don't know for sure but it could be she dated men who simply didn't care about her and were playing games. It's called having one sided relationships, happens pretty common
@@TemporalBarrage I never said that were the Only reasons, in fact I was giving her the benefit of the doubt that she was responsible and accountable.
But, the 2 most likely other scenario for having such a severe one sided situationship, lets call it what it is when it's that bad it's likely not a relationship to start
is either:
a) She was dealing w a sociapath who won't and don't feel any guilt or natural human need for even basic reciprocation, most people will feel bad and give of signal of discomfort, like making excuse to reduce interaction so they don't feel too guilty, only the 3% of such cognitively wired people can keep taking more and more, care and giving and remain cold and yet be happy to non-chalantly received w/o reacting
b) She clearly dated a Chad, now to be fair a Chad is sexually in demand and his attention is in demand, so she might see it as giving care and just giving of herself, but in his mind his attention, even to receive, which cost him time, is considered his fair contribution back, there is nothing wrong with this fair exchange as that's his price tag she was willing to pay, until she could not psychologically afford to keep paying that price.
So that cover your other case, a women need to have have at least some maturity and discernment to avoid sociopath, and they need to take accountability and stop dating chads. Men in today society really should not feel sorry for ANY women who are 3,4,5 or average at best dating way over her league and complaining that a guy who is a 8,9,10 in look and just charm and sexually experience isn't reciprocating her simping behavior, she need to grow up then and accept their attention has a very high cost, if they don't want to pay it, set realistic standards for themselves.
Aka. Modern women needs to Stop lying too themselves when they are attracted to a cute guy who isn't there to commit.
Anything else, back 2 my original 2 points learn to reduce his stress in his mission, learn to be useful and helpful specifically tailored to that man you want in your life.
@@TemporalBarrage again you are taking responsibility and common sense away from women.
If a women if dating a guy who is playing games without giving, why would she be convince to keep giving and caring?
Use your common sense, either you are a man who do not understand how a women thinks or your really buy into the delusion that a women can love a man unconditionally like a mother who loves a child who gives zero reciprocation
Women will only keep giving and caring if they want something, even something unattainable that they know they can't have but believe they are the exception to the rule.
what the hell are you talking about? do you think women are not human beings? of course we love. @@joshg854
Many years ago I was running a business and dating a woman I liked but felt it wasn’t going anywhere. Then I ran into serious difficulties with the business. This woman stepped in, unasked, and helped me straighten things out, strictly on a volunteer basis. She provided not only emotional support but practical help and advice. After things got back on track I realized that yes, I was going to marry her.
Good on you (and her)
That's a keeper. You're lucky.
Wow! What a lucky bastard. I feel envy,man! 😂😂😂 But now seriously, congrats to you and her.❤
Maybe you were already successful, but I'm assuming she found her dark horse, nice story man
Marry her and lose everything. Mix marriage and the business you started and that'll be the end.
One thing is a girlfriend helping, another a wife that has the backing off the State with its uneven divorce laws.
Separating marriage and business is as important as separating State and religion
We don’t love those who help us. We love those we help.
Best Comment!! 👏👏👏 nailed it!
Trueeee
Not necessarily, if i am always the one helping but won't get any help back when needed, i will leave it behind.
True
We SHOULD love those who help us but you’re right, often the helpers are not appreciated.
Did the "Master Key" for 15 years. Cooked for him (and his brothers), wrote emails, did research, suggested reading to expand his mind, organised schedules, kept up with global politics to have something interesting to discuss with him, and he dropped me after receiving a legacy. I was an 8 - ended up a 5 by the time he finished with me. He's now looking for a Ukrainian bride. I've worked hard and bumped myself back to a 7. My advice to women: see to yourself!
Great advice. The same thing happened to my aunt. She sacrificed herself until he made it to the top of his career, and he dropped her for a younger Swedish woman.
Has the man voiced WHY he did this? Difficult to make judgement hearing just one side of the story. Oftentimes one side says they did all the great things professionally but missed out on what was really important for the other, such as physical love and intimacy.
Assuming all this is true and you were of an integral, flawless character then this is still 100% of your making, cause you lacked judgment on the kind of guys you associated with. I'm a guy and I'm saying this from personal experience, the same happened to me with my years-long ex-wife. I'm retrospect there were a lot of signs that I just ignored at the time, surely if you look hard enough it's the same thing for you.
He divorced you because you became a 5......obviously
But you should see to yourself while you are STILL MARRIED
We have now reached the place in western society where a licensed mental health professional has to explain to the average woman that in order to secure male commitment, she must actually* contribute something of value to the relationship.
I know it needs to be said, but dear God.
Most women will think that this is offensive.
She'll rebut "I'm the prize".
@@mbg9650she's objectifying herself, which is quite disgusting.
They want everything for nothing in return except a high body count
I’m a woman and I completely agree. You have to be willing to give as much as you take.
My teacher did everything you said. Her husband went to law school, and she supported them and their son in every way possible including financially via her job. The moment he graduated and became a lawyer, he divorced her.
Did she support him, or did she give him money but nagged him behind closed doors?
Did she vet him first, look at his character and red flags?
@@Straga_Severa She supported him in every way possible. She did the cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc. He studied law. She also paid for all his university courses. He cheated on her, divorced her, and married the other woman. My teacher is a 7/8 beauty wise. I do not know what the other woman looked like.
@@Pheonix1111 Well, then it seems like she picked a bad guy. Shame on him, and a cautionary tale for women - vet the guys using the brain, don't just pick a guy because of butterflies in the stomach.
A story as old as time.
@@Pheonix1111See his answer? The woman did everything for him and as soon as he got everything he divorced her and gave everything to other woman.
When men take advantage of women it's because she 'chose a bad guy'. Obviously it was her mistake, she didn't have the brains and therefore her fault, never the mans fault.
But we all know thats what it happens 90% of times. I have some wealthy friends who are the offspring of their parents second marriage with a younger wife who usually just embraces the 'stay at home mom' role.
My friends have also been brainwashed into hating their half siblings (offspring of second marriage) because they believe they are golddiggers and are after the 'fathers wealth incentivated by their bitter mom who happened to be the first wife.
The first wife was the one who was there while her man was 'building', her kids weren't raised with a silver spoon in their mouths because mom was being frugal and helping her man getting money so later they could enjoy comfort. Oh well, he made money, divorced her ass and went to offer the 'comfort' to another woman
Well this applies only if you are not dealing with a narcissist. With them, you give and give til your so physically and emotionally exhausted. It will never be enough
Narcissists aren't the majority of the population.
Absolutely fact and I left before ending my life
yes, it would have been good if Orion would have mentioned this in the video.
And lets be honest.. most women seem to be attracted to narcissists.
@marciebaker9816
Narcissist is practically a natural human trait. Self importance = life / survival. Yes we live in a society that doesn't mean a tiger or bear lurking around the corner. But the evolutionary drive for this mechanic in our body is still a thing.
Some men will use you for your knowledge and capabilities. I helped build his business, his goals were mine, I did everything to get him where he is today. We’re not together anymore, he left me in debt, and he is out sleeping with other women.
Sorry to hear. If you are that able business wise, you will have no problem building one of your own
Lol, stop playing the victim. Like someone already said, if you helped him build his business, you should be able to get yourself out of debt.
@@Daniel-jv2tj Obviously that was long time ago. I’ve moved on and built my wealth back up. Thanks for your concern.
Yup! And your story is the norm not the exception because too many males in usa were raised by their hard working single mamas.
If he never witnessed his own father loving or caring for his own mother, where did he learn how to love and care for you?
The video said to be useful. It said to make a meal, maybe do some laundry, listen, provide support, and don't let pride get in the way of intimacy. It didn't tell you to run a business for the guy. It didn't tell you to lose your identity in him. You're framing this as if you were passive and submissive but all of the actions you list are assertive and dominate. He left you because he wanted to be with a woman, not a life coach. He wanted a relationship with a human female, not his mother. You overstepped your boundaries as a girlfriend and he stopped seeing you as a female but instead as a tool. That is dangerous to do with men. Once you tell a guy you're cannon fodder, you're going right to the front of the war.
"A man will never get rid of a useful woman."
"Ask questions. Listen to him."
"Provide instrumental support."
"You're not just here to benefit."
"There are a lot of women competing for my money. There aren't a lot of women competing to help me."
"It's a way to bypass 99% of competition in the sexual marketplace."
And this is all true.
A man will never get rid of a useful woman.": wow, and women are entitled and heartless. How cynical and if true, I guess I'm getting 20 cats from the shelter this weekend.
This is just not true. Anyways, male delusion is real so there’s that.
The weak worthless women are trying to live off you. They never offer anything other than seggs
😂
Yup
Been there 2x
And 😢
He took all that help.
He took all my support.
He achieved success.
The 1st 😂 couldn't get enough women because 1 was just not enough...he had lots 😂 of women for sex and help at the same time. Mr. Ceo...I walked 🚶♀️ away from after realizing what he was up to.
The 2nd guy, I benefited by helping his career, saved him $300k on his house, etc..benefited him at church ⛪️..
And he married someone else. 😢
SO MY YEARS OF HELPFULNESS WAS GIVEN FREELY WITH LOVE ❤️ AND I DIDN'T GET THE MAN TO MARRY ME.
So I urge caution ⚠️
@@hrhtreeoflife4815I still think if you're mildly attractive this gives you the best chance.
True with success other women want that man and men love lots of opportunities for sex.
If the woman was willing to let him be with other women too he would have to seriously question, where else would he ever find a woman like this?
I would think this would put the woman at the front of the pack.
Great video, only potential addition is that once the relationship is secured, men, do not start taking this help for granted. Feeling taken for granted is one of the main causes of resentment for women once in a long-term relationship. As a woman, I genuinely believe women are happiest when helping, but being asked to do more when you're already stretched thin, or having the help you provide be dismissed by your man is incredibly disheartening. Men, take care of your woman so she can take care of everything else.
This is a very fair request. Men ALSO feel that women are ungrateful and use us as ATMS, and dont see us as souls. So, both men AND WOMEN would do well to value their helper!
Appreciating a spouse should happen on a daily basis.
As a women, this is so true. But I feel only a low value male would take for granted what a women does for him. The quality of the man plays a huge role!
Thanks for pointing this out. I have seen relationships where this has happened unfortunately. After the man received all the help he needed he then left the woman and went on with his life. So yes the man must have respect and understand how much the woman has done for him.
This! I spent 14 years helping a man and all I got was a tshirt. 😂
I suggest being useful could also translate as being loving and caring. Be his comfort place. His moon at night. His water when he's on fire. His solution when he needs it. His bed to rest. His motivational speaker when he feels down. His cheerleader.🎉🎉😊❤ When a woman loves you, she will do anything to make you happy. but you also have to show her you are worthy of her love. Unfortunately this is where most men fail.
I totally agree - maybe it's just luck to find a man that loves and respects you. women are the strong ones!
The Man that you are missing is a Man who will love God through you, and Love God and you. By him loving God through you, All of the love that He gives you truly he's giving it to God and you're just receiving the overflow as He feeds your soul. and if you can do the same then it's a match made in heaven. The best love to give is when a man always keeps in mind the holy spiritual realm and not just the physical. walking in the spirit and loving in the spirit isn't the same as walking in the flesh and loving in the flesh, one is an animal in nature and the other isn't of this world. Hopefully, you'll experience real love one day, Jesus please help them.
How I see it , as a relatively successful woman : you help yourself first, then help the man you are with. Not only you, not only him. I think it's fair
First problem, by putting yourself first unequivocally, you're saying that you're more than the relationship could every be worth. It should 100% be, the relationship first, then yourself, then them as an individual. Any relationship that is 50/50 won't work, you need to be 100/100 in the relationship. You're in the relationship because your life is better with them in it, not because you need them, but because your good life is made even better because they're in it too. You show up, every day, for the relationship. It's give and take, but mostly give.
@@JustAGuyWithThoughtsI agree 💯
@@JustAGuyWithThoughts You can't treat a relationship as more important than yourself. If your partner just decides they are bored of you one day your whole world will come crashing down if your relationship was the most important thing you had. Everyone is free to come and go as they please and will do so sometimes despite how much you offer them. I think it's good to look after yourself first because that's all you are entitled to, your own company. Traditional mindsets about relationship usually lead to unhappy people that can't separate because they are codependent.
I agree with you that a relationship is a complementary thing that should make an already good life better, but your own self is definitely more important than an arbitrary vow to stay together
@@symeon5518 early days no, but when you’re all in looking to build a future, 100% you should. If you put yourself before your marriage, your marriage will die. If you put yourself above the relationship, the relationship will die. Relationships take compromise, so if you put yourself above the relationship and wont compromise, then your relationship won’t last or one or both of you will end up miserable as hell.
Early days, absolutely protect yourself first, but when you’re committed and building a future, it’s no longer “I”, it’s now “we”. You made a choice to live a life which is intertwined with someone else, that doesn’t mean you don’t do your own things or have your own interests or anything, but it does mean that when you’re making decisions, you’re making them with two people in mind, not just yourself.
Yeah but life’s not fair and neither is the sexual market place.
I agree with the usefulness wholeheartedly. My ex gf is absolutely enviably gorgeous. A 9 out of 10. She makes a living being gorgeous. But she is always faulting me for not doing enough for her, which is absolutely false. She doesn’t engage w my friends or family (unless there is something to get out of them for her), and became an absolutely drag to be a round with. My current gf is equally good looking, but she not only helps around the house voluntarily and happily (because we are creating a home together), but she even helps me when we go out. Sometimes I’ll be in a social function and I will be busy talking w someone. She spots a person who looks bored or left out. She will actively engage with that person in conversation and will introduce that person to others to make them feel included. She is an absolute keeper.
How did you meet and connect though? Social circle? Business?
Probably looking for some simp to monkey branch too.
@@keylanoslokj1806 both through friends.
@@keylanoslokj1806Craigslist pay a date.
I was scolded for doing the same from an abusive ex bf, go figure.
This is spot on. As a well established man (I know, sounds arrogant), this seriously was the difference with the women I dated in the past and my now wife. Most chics were more of a pain in the ass than anything else. They were usually blinded by tons of feminist propaganda. My wife will literally do anything for me and makes my life easier. I could’ve gotten sex anywhere. But loving and caring about my goals and ambitions while a taking interest and helping me with them is why I put a ring on that finger. She’s amazing and irreplaceable. No other woman even comes close. As a result, I want to do everything for her too. It’s a wonderful dynamic that we have.
(YES) "Selfless" generous women are the ones that get doted on. Modern women want attention and to be treate like queens, but do the opposite actions that would get them that.
I don't remember who said it. But he noticed that nearly all women to wildly successful men had one thing in common. They were supportive.
You seem like a good dude.
@@anderslennartsson1828 true
Very happy for you two. In my experience, the best relationships are the ones where both parties believe they have the better deal.
I did all of this. 100%. Got the lot. However. A man who hasn't been taught to express emotion because his parents were cold, will see the demise of his marriage when she feels unloved, unappreciated and unprotected. When a woman gives her all in this way, he has to cherish her like a prized possession. Not get so wrapped up in all they built to end up a workaholic. I love my husband, but with no input from his side he has completely drained me.
Then he is not what society calls a "high-value man", which includes high emotional intelligence and that he nurtures his relationships.
I'm sorry you're in this situation and having to struggle with this.
I have met those men . There are a lot of them out there.
The title of this series is: "How to get any man you want". It doesn't address whether the man you want is any good . . .
Good point.
“Everyone is going to hurt you. You just need to find the one worth suffering for.”Bob Marley
So, no one? I can hurt myself just fine. Why do I have to find someone else to do it too😂
@@nightfighter7452 lol hurt together ?
Ladies only do this for men who actually want commitment. If you desire marriage and he doesn’t, you’re not going to convince him by being useful to him. Other than, I concur with this message 100%.
That is why conversations about long term end goals in dating should come out early on in the dating process.
Women following this advice can lead high value men into considering marriage.
Yes, women also need to be accepting and trustworthy enough to confide in. Many men avoid intentions and emotions, it's weaponized severley against men as much as men. I know this is lame, but feminism had caused men to internalize alot more pushing back by being hyper masculine. It's a dog show out there and women today are just as bad as the men
Doesn’t work for a psychopath or a narcissist
@@judithojiaka5346 Why does 'being useful' not appeal to psychopaths and narcissists? These are about 1-2% of the general population, but can be a larger proportion of 'highly successful' men who have used dark triad traits to get to the top. However, they are also very high in criminals and prisoners. Women love such men due to their own deficiencies in judgement and character.
This is exactly what separated my wife from the masses. There is so much truth in this.
Very happy you could find your 'diamond in the rough'! But please pray for the rest of us! TY
@@inconnu4961 It’s not just prayers that’ll get you there! There’re ways of increasing your chances. Integrate into a community that shares your values. And learn to tell real diamonds from false ones!
@@inconnu4961don’t on rely on hope or prayer. Do the hard work of improving yourself. Otherwise you’re literally delusional
@@inconnu4961 I’M NOT SURPRISED THAT MOST PEOPLE AGREEING WITH THIS ARE MEN. The thing about men is what they tell you WITH THEIR MOUTH IS DIFFERENT FROM WHAT THEY ACTUALLY GET MARRIED TO. Most men I know DONT HAVE THE WIVES DESCRIBED IN THIS VIDEO. Most men don’t even care how intelligent a woman is or the kind of questions she asks. In fact they don’t want a smarty pants. They want a woman who knows her place as a woman, will put her family before her career, knows how to cook, clean, raise kids, keep the home well and most of all KNOW HOW TO SHIT THE EFF UP! MEN DONT WANT A WIMAN WHO IS CONSTANTLY ASKING QUESTIONS AND BEING TOO INQUISITIVE. They find it annoying the less you say they better. But men will come on the internet and act like they like introspective women but they actually don’t end up marrying them. Why do you think most women who are interested in putting their best foot forward, and constantly strive for men to see how different they are from other women and to help men, end up single while ALL THE DUMB BLONDES NEXTDOOR STAY MARRIED?😂😂😂😂
@@inconnu4961 xD Or just accept that only 40% of men get to reproduce, and move on with your life.
I think there's no girl for me out there, any good women have already been picked up and the rest are emotionally exhausting (thus why they're single). Besides I'm not a provider either, I got kinda demotivated by life and a single mother to chase a career, and what woman in the world would care about my intelligence going through the roof? Hope is fine, but no need to be delusional.
This video proves that it's better to stay single as a woman and work towards your own goals
Sure, at least in these patriarchal societies like USA.. So happy that these videos are like the 1920's here :D
Very true ❤
@andersnielsen6044 There are relationship paradigms that will never change no matter what. Men give access to relationships and marriage. And it's the men who have standards. Tough luck to you.
@@samdatech At least not here in the modern and free world. I would never settle with a woman who had only a supporting role.. I want a partner - a partner for life!
@@samdatech 🤣 Only men have standards, huh? 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Mutual support in relationships is essential. A friend of mine devoted herself to supporting, loving, and helping her husband raise his children from a previous relationship, maintaining their life together flawlessly for 25 years. Sadly, he left her for a younger woman when she entered menopause and experienced intimacy-related pain. This betrayal shattered her, despite receiving significant divorce compensation. This story underscores the similarity in emotional needs between men and women. We must cultivate compassion, empathy, and understanding, rather than viewing relationships solely as transactions. Our society needs to prioritize love, care, and kindness over narcissism.
Telling a woman to set aside her pride is like telling her to relax when she's upset.
A woman's pride is why they're incapable of an apology
Not sure it’s just a woman thing: it is the first of the deadly sins after all!
@@celiacresswell6909 thanks for ruining the joke
@@TV-oc4ml fair point - still a good joke!
maybe he meant for her to give at the first date (have sex)... if she is not "beautiful" she should hurry with sex and next day to make useful cleaning of his house and breakfast : )) she should ask discretely what he likes for breakfast during first dates. I am joking. a bit.
As a woman who married a high value man in my early 20s, this is the most accurate advice I’ve heard so far. This is exactly what my man expects even now after 20 years of marriage. It’s what keeps him feeling valued and what keeps him feeling lucky to have me. Women who do marry an excellent man-don’t ever stop being useful and caring, just as Orion describes
It’s your responsibility to teach the young women out there because mannn it’s nasty out there
That's why you married, tell this to any women who is single and see the answers you get.
Many people who speak to the gender wars time and again state that women self correct in marriage! I believe this, but if it only occurs in marriage how the hell are men to decide, in effect men are sold a lie and when it's a miss for taking a huge risk it's pick better women...
Thank you for your honesty, but most men will remain MGTOW. There's zero light at the end of the tunnel and women know what they are doing. I don't know how women expect men to continue with the status quo, most men don't a social contract it doesnt benefit us when 80%+ women are taking the piss
Good women still exist, I know they do since I´m married to one of them. Happy for you Lara, and for your husband!
"High value" and "excellent" are in the eye of the beholder...do you mean a good provider, or a moral man, or ?
Unfortunately, some women never get beyond their evolutionary programming to seek out the best provider (at the expense of morality), just as many men never get beyond seeking physical beauty (at the expense of morality),
@@jerrysmith5782 Only spirituality changes the rule. It has the capacity to make both gender be truthful, honest and humble. It's a rare thing today, though.
I “knew” this as a young woman and willingly engaged - because I believed we were a team working towards common goals of establishing ourselves, a family, etc. For years it seemed to work until I realized I was just doing all the work while he coasted. (got out long ago) Now as a much older woman, while this still makes sense, I’m very leery of signing up to be a caretaker: I’m a retired RN and that’s the near-first comment men will make (jokingly of course).
The title of this series is: "How to get any man you want". It doesn't address whether the man you want is any good . . .
xD Women will always find a reason to separate, and they will always blame the man. One story after another. I bet you never considered that you could have been the reason he didn't put in the effort you expected.
Well, I hope being alone makes you happy, because if not, I wouldn't have any sympathy for you.
@@nightmareTomek They can't take accountability.
As much as I agree in theory that yes, women should be useful and add value in a relationship I am sure we have all seen on social media and have seen in person the abundant stories of women who have given their men EVERYTHING they have and been useful to the point of being burnt out but if that man didn’t want to marry her (because he didn’t see her as the prize that he has to lock down because other men want her too) it doesn’t matter how useful she is. He will take until she is bled dry and then go after the woman he wants who is his dream girl or marry her and resent her for not being the dream girl who HE wants to adore and feels the desire to provide for because he views HER on a pedestal. Top tier men don’t want a workhorse, they want a partner who is a prize.
I agree..there are so many men who will use women as placeholders till he finds the one he really wants..and in the mean time,just use her for her resources and bleeding her dry. Men can be users and manipulators too.
Yes, real life is a bit different.
That's the thing; it's still about winning over (and securing) a partner. And not this stupid fairy tale of a woman fulfilling a man's wishes for him only to use her. As if all men are benevolent caregivers! Lol. Quite the opposite.
Exactly, yes there's a partnership aspect of course, but the top tier men I've dated have wanted to solve their own problems, especially in the work arena. Pickmesha out there running around cooking all the meals, sending all the texts, trying to 'win' him, is often not letting him show up, pursue, and provide enough.
The title of this series is: "How to get any man you want". It doesn't address whether the man you want is any good . . .
Thank you Orion. Speaking from experience, this is spot on. Maybe woman are the minority of viewers that watch your channel (truth hurts) but the few of us that are here, we truly appreciate your work.
👑
You're taking this seriously? I watch this for entertainment purposes only. Ain't no way I'll take academic style manipulation as sound advice 😂
@@-glitch-8195 You can lead a horse to water...
@@-glitch-8195sure, better take astrology and charlatains as sound advices. 😂
@@-glitch-8195 I love when people use the 😂 emoji to show smugness but it comes off as you actually crying
as a male I appreciate the knowledge for defensive reasons
Bro said defensive but I concur
Orion is our Minister of Security and Defense 🤣
Yes it’s good to protect yourselves that’s a given. This is why marriage is not a option for me lol . And I’m a successful 13 year relationship. I have to keep learning about the opposite sex to keep it successful.
Same
Better to be safe than sorry with women these days.
And when you finally manage, through self-sacrifice and gruellingly hard work (done so skilfully and stealthily that he barely notices), to gain your place in his life, you get to devote yourself to serving him for the rest of your life. That's amazing!! Thank you so much for such helpful advice!!
I’M NOT SURPRISED THAT MOST PEOPLE AGREEING WITH THIS ARE MEN. The thing about men is what they tell you WITH THEIR MOUTH IS DIFFERENT FROM WHAT THEY ACTUALLY GET MARRIED TO. Most men I know DONT HAVE THE WIVES DESCRIBED IN THIS VIDEO. Most men don’t even care how intelligent a woman is or the kind of questions she asks. In fact they don’t want a smarty pants. They want a woman who knows her place as a woman, will put her family before her career, knows how to cook, clean, raise kids, keep the home well and most of all KNOW HOW TO SHIT THE EFF UP! MEN DONT WANT A WIMAN WHO IS CONSTANTLY ASKING QUESTIONS AND BEING TOO INQUISITIVE. They find it annoying the less you say they better. But men will come on the internet and act like they like introspective women but they actually don’t end up marrying them. Why do you think most women who are interested in putting their best foot forward, and constantly strive for men to see how different they are from other women and to help men, end up single while ALL THE DUMB BLONDES NEXTDOOR STAY MARRIED?😂😂😂😂
Lucky me, I get the opportunity to perform unpaid labor by working as a maid, chef, assistant and nanny for a grown man for the rest of my life🤪🤪🤪
@@revilivaille7861you're a sad excuse of a woman if you consider household chores unpaid labour.
Do you also pay rent to your partner?
Some women don't deserve commitment.
Hm, the serving is going to be mutual , though !?
Oh lucky you! 🤣
I agree. I was happily married for 36 years when my husband passed unexpectedly. I was the partner you just talked about.
You can tell that all of this is true by looking at interviews of successful men who’ve been in lifelong marriages.
They always ALWAYS praise their wives for having supported them, helped them conquering all those objectives.
What's funny is the ones that divorce their husbands claim that they supported them.......but if that were the case then it would be unlikely that they'd get divorced in the first place.
@@hardluck8732 women’s dating coaches have a term for it - Barb the Builder. She works so hard to build up the guy, when he becomes successful, he discards her for an upgrade.
Of course men say that, but we really don’t know why he married her. It could be as simple as her being prom queen or a cheerleader. She was the prize and once she married, she no doubt started supporting him, why wouldn’t she?
@@Bubbles-od2tv Many women would still sit on their ass even if brought into a successful man's life. Remember they think they are the prize many times, and they think HE is lucky to have ME.
@@Bubbles-od2tv They may date. Most people aren't getting married that young. It takes time for a man to get his stuff together.
As a woman who lost contact with my dad. It’s been so hard to find guidance. And so many videos on social media just mark women as negative things. But I can’t wait to implement these things. I kept doing the things that I would have loved like the gift giving and using sweet words. But it’s what you say. You have to be useful. And I know my sweet gestures weren’t working. But now it all makes sense.
The logic is good in the video but the hard part for most woman is how to respect and serve a man. This video is about serving. If you look at most every TV show you have watched in your life you will never see a woman respect a man or serve him. It will take a lot of understanding to be able to do that.
Sorry you have felt all the antagony! If its any consolation, I am sure both sides are feeling it from the opposite side. its like a cosmic game of boys vs girls, like we played in primary school! LOL
An interesting aspect I've noticed for advice towards men and towards women is that while there are biases among what each tends to prefer, if it is good and legit advice, following it makes you a better, happier and more solid person all around, regardless of how these more immediate priorities work out. Keep this in mind for anything you choose to integrate into your life.
Ja you basically did the man’s role. It has to be reciprocated
I can assure you that if you're a woman and you're watching a video like this and keen to act on it, you're already way ahead of the pack. I wouldn't mind betting very few women will bother to watch this and do the kinds of things he's saying. I hope it works out well for you :)
This is true. With my college boyfriend who I ended up marrying, I did all his homework for one class, pulled all nighters to tutor him for another class, and also passed the technical exam for his very first job out of college. Problem is that I ended up losing some respect for this guy and eventually divorced him.
This is a perfect summary of why this video is absolutely crap. Your ex used you and that is what this guy is advocating for. Don't fall for it, ladies.
@@indigolotus22 that's the operative word I was looking for "used". Been there. Got short changed. Maybe it works for others.
That’s not a high value man. In a way you were chasing him. That’s different than helping a pan with the self drive Orion was speaking of.
@@fitwithbrittany2706 I don't know which part of my post I mentioned anything about my ex-husband being a HVM. You must be very smart for recognizing the sarcasm in my original post.
@@indigolotus22 I don't think he used me per se. It was more like he was helpless without me. But completely agree with the first sentence of your post.
Great advice. Another qualifier I would add is let him come to you a bit. When he initiates an interaction make it positive and memorable. But don’t overly peruse him to spoil him. Allow him to crave your spoiling.
The man’s need for you needs to grow over time. You give him more and more until he’s in love. This shit is real.
And I’m sure there are caveats to this. It’s half art half science.
Did that for 2 decades
I got pregnant when he decided he was ready, then changed his mind and left me with twins.
Sorry but I disagree. The result is not guaranteed if all you are is a useful tool and not considered a partner. once they reach their goal it is tempting to look for
someone else/new and the excitement that comes with it.
I’m not a narcissist but investing in someone else without boundaries can easily turn into a recipe for disappointment
Here we go. With the female arguments from exceptions.
"I'm the exception that makes you entirely wrong"
-- prideful woman who is a "great listener"
He said it at the beginning of the video. "There are other things you need to do" that he didn't get to yet.
He said it multiple times throughout the video: "this is your best bet"
That stated. I do agree with your last statement.
That is sincerely a solid take.
@@therealstunbmun I am not the exception, there are masses of wonderful, supportive, smart, accomplished, compassionate, giving women who followed the path only to get discarded and replaced. Women were not put on this earth to serve men and wait for crumbs. (Sorry). That is not where our value lies. While I agree with the general argument that being a self centered diva is not conducive to the best results, not all women are entitled bitches. I repeat: most women are NOT self centered bitches. There are so many women you could only dream of partnering with who have tried the "forget yourself and give give give" only to see their deeply good heart broken by the one who actually was selfish, user, prideful and entitled. Wouldn't it be nice if everyone took responsibility? Now was I stupid? Oh yes. Will I be again? Nope. But will my heart still be open and giving, and my boundaries solid? you can bet on that.
Wow. That sounds terrible. Someone can do everything right and still get screwed over. While Dr Orion is correct, people should still have boundaries. Giving your all to someone who wouldn't care if you dropped dead is a bad move.
There's a difference between being a doormat and a keeper. And that is self respect and boundaries. Maybe he'll address this in the next 2 episodes. Best of luck to you.
@@victoryigbokwe7691 yes, there is a difference indeed. I don't care about fancy dinners and what "standing" you have. Nor being taken for granted or advantage of. Alas, love is stupid at times ...
I'm sorry to hear that. There are two sides to every story though. Taken at face value, if that's exactly what he did, then he doesn't sound like a high-value man. More of a schmuck. But still, very sorry.
You don’t always get what you want
this is life. and understanding this will make your life better
sometimes thats for the best, Lacan knew that
You get what you deserve
You get what you deserve
... you get what you need.
I was naturally like this when I was young and married very easily at age 20. Sadly, I was divorced 5 years ago and have spent the 5 years self reflecting on where I need to grow, and am now 6 months in to a new relationship doing these things for him. Not necessarily to get a commitment, but just because I care about him and want to help him with his home life. There are sometimes where I feel a little anxiety come up because I’m not being “adored” but I am being appreciated.
Hmmm, I see women struggling with this here. Let me try help you if I may:
It takes strength and grace,alot of it actually to do this. Here's a way to see if he is genuine, if he not only acknowledges and praises but reciprocates and rewards the behaviour or action.
This looks different and I'm not your man but maybe he works harder for you or saves to take you on holiday! Alot of men don't open up emotionaly or praise the action simply because men get severley punished for it (women lose attraction and respect) or because women manipulate men with said feelings. Men are largely private and women love to share with friends so men internalize and this could seem as if it's not appreciated!
That being said he may also not have genuine intentions and if a women is making herself useful and giving of herself with good intent and it's being abused this speaks to a very real problem. It may be that he is not meeting your needs emotionaly and if this is the case you will need to speak up on it and not weaponize the outcome if he does confide in you. It may also be that you seeking a commitment like a ring and he may not want marriage. (Not because he doesn't want you, but because this opens him up to the reality of a divorce and all that entails). If this is the case I don't know if you will convince him, waiting on him to come around won't change this. You will need to decide then if you could move past this and still be happy. I've seen women stay in this situation when money is a factor as this guy then has alot of options, if you want commitment this kind of guy won't! Why would he? Good men would but not all good men has this guy optionality and this ruins women badly.
Lastly it could also be that he thinks all is well but you have not communicated to him what your emotional needs are, men don't read minds and we are largely stunted emotionally 🤣. However maybe you have and you hoping to change his mind? Anyway you'll know where you stand, and you will figure it out. Settling though is not the answer as your comment shows it's already festering somewhat, prolonging things makes matters worse not better.
With today's dating market though it may be tough especially if your 30+ but if you are genuine and useful with noble intentions you could find a good guy easily if your standards are inline with what you offer. Money is the last thing though I'd advise women to use as a marker, many arseholes hide behind it and superficial women accept it however a good women knows her worth and won't. I hope you figure it out
Holy fuck this is long. Probably just male nonsense.
That’s not why you first got married, men love to Marty extremely young women who are pretty. You are older now and it won’t be as easy even if you use the same formula. Men want to you to think this is what they want so they can benefit from you without the commitment. I’M NOT SURPRISED THAT MOST PEOPLE AGREEING WITH THIS ARE MEN. The thing about men is what they tell you WITH THEIR MOUTH IS DIFFERENT FROM WHAT THEY ACTUALLY GET MARRIED TO. Most men I know DONT HAVE THE WIVES DESCRIBED IN THIS VIDEO. Most men don’t even care how intelligent a woman is or the kind of questions she asks. In fact they don’t want a smarty pants. They want a woman who knows her place as a woman, will put her family before her career, knows how to cook, clean, raise kids, keep the home well and most of all KNOW HOW TO SHIT THE EFF UP! MEN DONT WANT A WIMAN WHO IS CONSTANTLY ASKING QUESTIONS AND BEING TOO INQUISITIVE. They find it annoying the less you say they better. But men will come on the internet and act like they like introspective women but they actually don’t end up marrying them. Why do you think most women who are interested in putting their best foot forward, and constantly strive for men to see how different they are from other women and to help men, end up single while ALL THE DUMB BLONDES NEXTDOOR STAY MARRIED?😂😂😂😂
I feel that being "appreciated" is not love. It is like being a good assistant. Speakout wiht him about this.
@@Nexus31323 No. You don't understand men . . .
You are so spot on about the “key.” During the several years before my husband and I married, we were amiably useful to each other. He later said that what originally attracted him to me, was the way I work!
This requires women to take accountability, something a vast majority of them wont do.
Accountability is womens kryptonite.
"how dare you tell me that my only existence isnt enough?"
A great majority of women are interested in guys who couldn’t give a f###, and turn around and don’t give a f### about genuine guys who are genuinely interested, because he ‘didn’t make me feel anything’ 🤢🤮
Because the culture we live in breeds accountability being only for men and victim mentality for women
Which also translates to the few women that do basically monopolising all the top men and the narcs not understanding why they only get pumped and dumped. a
00:00 Intro
00:44 Caveats
01:57 Good News, Bad News
05:30 The Biggest Obstacle
08:27 The Master Key
11:20 How Do You Help
15:03 This Is Your Opportunity
16:41 "I shouldn't have to..."
18:11 End
Basically women need to behave like a secretary to their boss.
Ouufff “stay on the shelf where you belong.” This just took Woman back 40 years.
Good
Extremely hard working psychologist, people like this makes it impossible not to visit the internet everyday 😄🥰
This is not only useful for women, but also good pointers for men as to what to look out for in women
Exactly what struck me while watching this 🙌🏽
Yes indeed. As men I guess we must allow ourselves to open up to, and consciously recognise, the innate contribution of women like this. Another well pointed out life-enhancing step in the growth process of men.
Smart men don't need to be told this.
facts
Yeah but what worries me is women who are not naturally inclined to be this way will fake it until they get the guy, this effort can never cease so it has to be genuine.
At this point, I have zero f’s left for any guy. I’ve realized that I’m better off alone. So much happier and healthier.
Girl, YES.
Let's touch base in 10 years
Oh my you are so correct this is excellent how I was able to be a helpmate to a masculine provider who is focused on his purpose in life. I just fell into his frame and my life has been a total bliss. 🥰 ❤
Of course he helps me with being supportive and encouraging towards my goals. We pleases each other physically and emotionally. And we both know our gender roles. He is the leader and I look up to him and respect his decisions as we work together to grow in our relationship and in wealth.
I have hear of that in the past. But we are free beings and we also have the choice to leave and walk way if we are in a bad situation. However patriarchy and abuse are two different things, not all men are abusive and confident, successful, secured men don’t need to suppress or abuse any woman because they are abundant in many ways.
We were created so different as men and women, but in the end we need each other to thrive and women need men to survive it’s been like that for decades.
He doesn’t look down on me because he chose me above the rest for a reason. He sees my value for that reason he welcomes me into his abundance.
I pray that more women heal their fear and wounds so they too can attract a healed strong masculine man who will uplift them with even more love, logic and safety. 🙏🏽
I love being a woman! I found out early on that to get what I wanted was to be welcoming, soft, caring, positive and USEFUL.
Some practical ideas to be useful:
- cooking hot meals for him
- taking over laundry to make sure he has clean clothes to wear in the morning
- asking how his day went at work. Anything cool happened? What was hard today?
- really listening to his response
- physical touch (doesn't necessarily have to escalate): massaging his shoulders, scratching his head, putting your head on his chest while watching TV together, etc.
- letting him do the same to you
- complimenting on how strong and capable he is. Noticing and telling him how well he handles certain situations.
I'm sure there are more so feel free to add to my list! 😊.
Excellent comment! Nice to hear you figured it out and it was successful for you! Keep being fantastic.
Yes that's what feminine women do.
... you are smart 😂 ...
Most valuable thing is massaging / kneading the muscles on top of the shoulders. I'm standing in line if he doesn't appreciate it : )
Queen👸
"Most Women Are Like A Second Job You Have To Pay To Work."
Damn this is true.
This whole video is worth watching just for that line. It sums up the reality of the archetypical modern woman very well.
He has beautiful wordings, he really knows how to deliver. That sentence says a lot about men who accept that 2nd job too
@@MMABeijing It's a very insistent drive
Sure sounds right to me.
And women probably think that's worthwhile, because they love spending all their time and energy 'working on the relationship'. They think the 'challenge' is a good thing, since they have nothing much else going on.
🙄
this is the best psychology channel I have ever come across..you are down to Earth, relatable, direct ..amazing.. I have learned things I actually knew I didn't know but could find anyone to explain ..
9 years of my marriage proved opposite: I've made my husband's career, inspired him to move to another city, worked to save money not being married him yet, than moved along with him to another county, gave birth to a child aaaand....from that very moment he was trying to get rid of me. I'm not mentioning tonns of problems, related to the life of an immigrants, I've solved for our family. And...for a moment, I'm 9,5 from that scale...
Am so sorry to hear that, some men are just users ans selfish, hope he gets his karma
@pazzzzz388 honestly, I don't care already: just watching the movie where a sick person with mommy separation trauma is the only character)))))))
The title of this series is: "How to get any man you want". It doesn't address whether the man you want is any good . . .
@@QED_ true
YES! Be useful for god's sake. Having respect or desire for an adult, self-centered toddler is impossible. If you're a woman who believes that you don't need to do anything for your man and that he should cater to you, know that you are making him miserable and that he probably despise you
U r right it is impossible to respect and desire adult self centered toddlers and thats exactly what a lot of males are
Despise is a bit of a strong word. I think a better word would be 'resent'. But I agree with the rest of your statement! very well said.
@@inconnu4961what are you doing for her, just curious
@@inconnu4961 I can honestly say that I despise my ex wife for what she put me though. I didn't deserve to be treated that way.
Because this is accurate and true, women are going to have a VERY hard time with it 😂
Couldn't help but to laugh at this.
Hush now, friend... they will come here and write a 5 pages long empiric dissertation. And if you dare answer to any of the 30 parallel stories and analysis they will call you out for digressing on the topic (crazy making and self projecting manipulation, you'll start to doubt your own reality while they are doing what they said you're doing). Are you ready for it?😂
This guy knows what's up. More women need to be quiet and listen.
YEP. it's called denial.
😂😂😂😂
It’s a joy to support another person, whether by encouraging, helping, or cooking a nice meal. I long to Infuse delight and love into whatever I give. It should flow and create a mutual reciprocity, and if the man takes me for granted by withholding his love, treating me poorly, or devaluing me, then he is not worth my acts of love or time. Both people need to be available to contribute to each other’s lives such that there is a mutual benefit. That is the love I look for, so I don’t think it is always good to attain any man, as he is not always great merely based on looks, wealth, talent, or any particular thing. A man of substance, of character, of compassion, of joy, a fully available man who can handle himself, living in his own integrity, living a life without avarice or cruelty, a man fully online, switch on, respectful and honest, that’s the man, the real man, to love.
Amen sister..you summed it up perfectly. We're not here to be martyrs either. We need to know our worth and feel it's a win-win. Otherwise it doesn't work.
Sounds like you see man as just another women. All that equality, social power, feminista ideology, and zero understanding of male behavioral psychology.
"whether by encouraging, helping, or cooking a nice meal" - man can save time and money eating out and hiring a weekly maid, successful man understand they benefit more from getting the occasional kick in the butt by mentors and other trusted man and near nothing from ego stroking encouragement from women.
"That is the love I look for....a man fully online, switch on....the real man" you need robot
if you can do without the wealth, talent, or any particular thing. Seriously get a AI robot since you have money and don't care for any natural attractive quality like a nice body he has build, a nice retirement and lifestyle, a talented man, a wealthy man build over time, but until the robot is ready, get a pet.
Again get a dog or cat or both, save massive moolah from your successful career, and die alone, nothing wrong with that.
I agree with all of this. 💯💯💯
I think in the hurt that we’ve experience we forget how to serve others in general - so this is a great reminder to serve others. ❤
This is without a shadow of a doubt the reason my husband and I are married today 💁🏾♀️
So preach this 'gospel' to your sisters! They need to hear the actual truth instead of the 'truth' that they prefer to hear! Congrats on your win!
Madam, he is a lucky man indeed. Well done to you both. David.
I’M NOT SURPRISED THAT MOST PEOPLE AGREEING WITH THIS ARE MEN. The thing about men is what they tell you WITH THEIR MOUTH IS DIFFERENT FROM WHAT THEY ACTUALLY GET MARRIED TO. Most men I know DONT HAVE THE WIVES DESCRIBED IN THIS VIDEO. Most men don’t even care how intelligent a woman is or the kind of questions she asks. In fact they don’t want a smarty pants. They want a woman who knows her place as a woman, will put her family before her career, knows how to cook, clean, raise kids, keep the home well and most of all KNOW HOW TO SHIT THE EFF UP! MEN DONT WANT A WIMAN WHO IS CONSTANTLY ASKING QUESTIONS AND BEING TOO INQUISITIVE. They find it annoying the less you say they better. But men will come on the internet and act like they like introspective women but they actually don’t end up marrying them. Why do you think most women who are interested in putting their best foot forward, and constantly strive for men to see how different they are from other women and to help men, end up single while ALL THE DUMB BLONDES NEXTDOOR STAY MARRIED?😂😂😂😂
So why you here. Hun go and enjoy your life.
I have told women before that if you make my life better and simpler because you are in it you can stay as long as you like, however if my day to day life is harder or more difficult because you are involved then that just won't work.
This is true for women as well.
This is forgetting that not all of us want that textbook definition of a “high value man”. I don’t want someone who is rich, or does over hours, or is a trust fund baby. I want someone who likes what they do and is employed, that’s it. From there it can be a teacher or a developer, or someone doing ceramics. I want someone kind who I can have interesting conversations with.
Here yes I will cook food for him, but I also expect him to do the same for me, but the best is if we do it together ❤
The most important thing is to respect him. If you do that you're already ahead of most women
Just as long as you are willing to date a less attractive men by looks, and be sure you can carry 1/2 the interaction and be as funny as him, and be as interesting as him, and understand developer almost all makes over 6figures, so much sure you also make 6figures.
This is your best video my friend. You explained a concept that many creators have difficulty with. If the man can satisfy all of his is needs on is own, this is no point being married.
Orion just explained the way men also establish relationships with future mentors and more successful colleagues that can help men level up in their careers. If ambitious men are willing to set their pride aside and bring value to those mentors, then women can do the same.
Yeah actually that is really a good perspective, EGO prevents people from being successful.
Great point.
This is a fantastic comment! i was thinking the SAME thing when i listened. i could use these techniques to be valuable in my men's groups! I am happy you pointed it out, though!
It's the difference between a dependent and a partner . My wife had a careeer of her own whwn we married. Our combined incomes served us well when we retired. We work together, play together and generally enjoy each others company. No one counts who did which chore we just get things done.
How gender neutral of you. Good job, comrad.
@@canelareina3795 when I met my (future) wife, she right up front said she scared most men away. I replied that I did not want anyone who would send me out to play by myself. She didn't scare me away and we have played well together for over 21 years now.
it's so terrible that he don't love you, but she is needed as a useful thing
Great advice, unless you're with an avoidant man who won't let you in past a certain point. My former bf told me several times I was at the very top of the women he dated, that I brought everything to the table, but it didn’t stop him from ghosting after 2+ years. At age 50+, he has never been engaged or married, so it had very little to do with me, who was always solicitous, appreciative and supportive.
lol why are u dating a 50 year old guy who isn't looking to be married?
At 50 a guy who can pull women has assets and wealth, that's 1/2 a centuary worth accumulated. Why df would he want too just give you half by western marriage laws?
You really been waiting at the finish line for a man who has already won everything and just go along for the ride and lifestyle huh? LOL
Ladies dr.orion is advising you find successful man who are still on their journey, hopefully in their late 20s till early 40s. And do this when you are 18 too your 20s, so you give him your best youthful years and he can give you his most successful years in return in his late 30s till 50s in a committed relationship, if he already Won, he won't find you that useful or helpful and bond with you.
The title of this series is: "How to get any man you want". It doesn't address whether the man you want is any good . . .
@@QED_ You are repeating yourself.
Very true.
@@dianalereve5402 Are you assuming that every user reads every comment posted to a video (?) That's an unrealistic assumption to make . . .
Even though I am a man,
This is the advice I needed to finally get over my ex-girlfriend.
I need someone who is useful to me and will share in the world we journey into, not someone I am carrying or pushing along into that world.
Sounds a strong, independent woman! Best of luck.
This is right on the money. My wife did this to the point that my life has been optimized and more productive with her and without her, my life is definitely going to be less productive.
As a woman, this is common sense, but it needed to be said. In all healthy, productive relationships each person offers some sort of value to the other. As soon as you no longer offer any value (or worse, become a nagging burden) is when the relationship suffers.
That isn't to say that there can't be areas where you need the support of your partner (for example, I have anxiety sometimes and my husband helps me through it). However, even if you are struggling and you need their support, it is important to find ways to add to their life.
The example of how guys that want to sleep with you doesn’t make you want them more and how being around or sleeping with a guy doesn’t make them want you more is BRILLIANT. Why didn’t that click for me sooner. Mind blown.
OK... this is a difference maker, but there is no way that any woman can get any man she wants this way even if she has access to him. Some guys are just not interesting in dating or in dating a particular type of woman or just toodamaged to appreciate what you are offeing. It's not exclusively up to the woman to solve this problem.
Love your channel brother, your clarity is second to none. I hope your content reaches new listeners, it has the potential to bring real positive change to society. Keep up the great work!
Thanks for the love, man. I really appreciate it. All the best
Your personal mission should exist beyond a relationship with a high-value man. Walk in with your own agenda separate from his existence. There is nothing wrong with being opportunistic. It is very possible to provide instrumental support to him that is easy for you to source; you just have to be clever about it. It should come at no effort (or minimal) to you but makes a world of difference for him (this is where compatibility and discernment come in handy). You must listen to what he's telling you about himself and as well as your intuition. Godspeed ladies!
Simple. I very simple Priest from a poor Billings in India told me, “ if you want love, give love”.
Obviously whatever you give your energy to thrives.
Real experiment both with water and potted flowers.
2 plants on same windowsill. One was nurtured , loved, spoken with love and cared for and one was just the basics. Water. No touch no tender loving words no preening.
The difference between the 2 was STUNNING!
Everything thrives with active love energy.
Everything withers without it. Peace ✌️
This video was well composed. You've touched on some points I didn't realized that were also my faults and I'm glad you pointed our faults, as I never was told what they were. Yes, this video I would rate 9.5/10 it is defineately up there. I'm very proud you come a long way from a couple of years ago. All the best, always!
As a woman, this all makes sense, and is how I would want my male friends and son treated by their relationship interests.
Be his support, assistant.
In ways HE values, not mirroring my own preferences.
He KNOWS what approach he respects and is drawn. Find out. Get to know him. As you would for anyone you care deeply about.
1 MAJOR Correction, unless you are an actual Founder in his mission, it's way more effective to change the mindset from Partnership to Assistant
Why?
If you start thinking like you have a claim to his mission and equal say in his decision, your pride will screw up his mission, now you will likely become and feel like an Obstacle and Distraction to him
@joshg854 You make an important point. Thinking "assistant" lays the path! I updated my comment (and mindset)
That is such a good step into what is right 😊 Both men and women need to become better for the sake of humanity as a whole. You can have the best only if you yourself are the one as well. That is so simple and so needed for all of us to finally truly realise. Fantastic work 💯
I would add that the woman has to be careful when selecting the man she gives to. I’ve given and been useful in my relationships and always got dumped. I over-gave to men who didn’t give anything back. It’s exhausting when someone tells you that they need more from you when they know they’re not giving much themselves. You carry the entire relationship only to see it crash and burn. This is why I rather be single going on twelve years now. You’re not a team when you’re alone in a relationship.
Stop dating Chads and you won't get used and dump. You over gave because you made your decision to get physical firstly on skin-deep criteria, and once you already had sex, you are have given leverage over to the man as your body is flooded with oxytocin, and now you will naturally seek the validation or face insecurity leading you to blindly over giving and become a cycle simpet or worst.
Rule of thumb, just stop dating good looking guys, and you will really become happy and fall deeply in love, not deeply in dopamine addiction and game chasing situationship that you think is love but is really a form of co-dependancy.
Seriously almost 100% of all the women I know over 30 who are very-very happy in their long term relationship are not with good looking man at first glance.
@@joshg854It's cute how you assume a man has to be good looking to use a woman and discard her.
@@alexisc7565 100% I will assume that, can you imagine a modern women at her peak beauty age 21-25 falling head over heals for a 5'5 ugly guy....hahaha
Come on, and even if he's 5'5 and ugly, But RICH! The I guarantee you she already cash in oh his money which he had to give and spend to date her. Then there is nothing to feel sorry for, it was likely a fair exchange of superficial standards.
The title of this series is: "How to get any man you want". It doesn't address whether the man you want is any good . . .
Sadia Khan talks about this very same thing. Everything right down to the pride issue. Thanks for reinforcing these concepts Doc. Completely makes sense and love this. Can't wait to hear the next videos.
Its great to hear she is in harmony with Dr. Orion! i will have to listen to her material as well!
She's a feminist, I know exactly what you referring too and no her narrative has a very different flavour to it. Sadia expresses equality of outcomes and excuses alot of female behaviour by doing it. I've never heard Sadia give men any advice that's actually outside of toxic feminist talking points or remotely valid. She the female Andrew Tate and a grifter
I want to see a collaboration between these two!!! That would be epic!!
@@RicksPhatPharm-vw2lbExactly, she's what Dr.Orion would analyse and label a Manipulator with the facade of being a helper.
I have listen to over dozens of her interview, there are few and far in between when she holds back her manipulation tactics, only twice and it was in interviews with 2 men who had net worth way-way over >100million, and you can immediately see her turning off her manipulation shit and advice as it would set off their radars and doing her best to stick to sound and factual advice not her carefully veil feminist tactics.
Muslim woman isn't gonna lecture us on how to be a good woman lmao. She should just go and practice how to live with a husband and other three wives and be happy with it. Immoral brothel she has in her home. Disgusting.
Not only should someone be useful, but they should also not be "un-useful." Being demanding, entitled, whiny, or neurotic will drive a man away in a heartbeat.
We would hope by being Useful (positive) that would immediately eliminate the chance of them being unuseful.
it won't, when he has useful woman in the background, then he likes to spend time with these others and to enjoy 🤔
@@yoohoo952 Yes, all men are selfish and evil. Why would a high value man value something that adds to his life? Isn't he more likely to exploit it or take it for granted? Isn't it selfishness that makes him high value? Oh wait, you are talking about players and bad boys? Are you mistaking selfish bad boys with good men? Is it your perception that is at fault?
@@dharmadasa66 isn't that high-low value a bit fasсist. well not all men will seek for courtesans but some will, but women can do the same too in some way. yes, "high value" means he is smart and senses opportunities and is not merciful. that we value today
@@yoohoo952 A high value man is what the woman values as high value. That is why it is called a 'market value'. When Orion asks women to consider how they get commitment from a high value man he does not define a high value man that much because obviously it is up to the woman to define it. If he does lean towards a general definition, it is because that is what most women (his audience) define as high value. As women tend to define such men in terms of success, then it is on them. Of course if a woman values compassion, empathy, loyalty etc. then she should seek that. His advice still applies: provide that man with value yourself. Why does all this need explaining in the modern age? Because people have lost sight of what value is, expecting everyone to provide it to them and not give anything back in return.
BEST "PsycHacks" video, ever! You've pointed out so much crap that many women do, that I do *not* do, in so many other videos. So I was ready to get all defensive against whatever you had to say here. But this is gold!! Remember when dating coaches for women used to say crap that boiled down to "be a Stepford Wife"? Yeah, that was crap!! I've taken notes on this one, and I'll take notes for the other 2 in the series as well. And I'm very curious to see how it goes when I put it into use. 😊
Pride has been utterly been obstructive in my experience. Thanks for shedding the light on that.
awesome. After this 3 part series is done, I would be interested in seeing a "How to get any Woman you want" lol
Be handsome.
Be intelligent.
Be ambitious.
Have money.
Dress well.
Work out.
There ... the World is your oyster.
@@ZappyOhwill Smith is calling...
@@ZappyOhwomen really got it easy man! And this video is even going to help a lot of hoes making up for their choices and get uninformed men and ruin their life💔
Be "useful", at least you'll be in her friend zone. lol
In a nutshell, be successful.
My first wife was very useful, very smart and it was a real pain to divorce her. But she was also a 'quarrelsome wife', a real pain to be around, constant arguing, she loved conflict, loved the drama, which I cannot stand and I have a low tolerance for. I'm happily married now, have been for over 15 years to a women who helps run our successful chain of retail stores. So I'm going to bet the second or third part of this series is going to include something along the lines of "even if you're useful, you can stuff up your marriage being a high conflict wife". Thanks Orion, great video as always.
How long did yiu know yoiur first wife before getting married? did she not love drama and conflict prior to marriage? Did she change> or did yiou miss it? or a bit of both?
Sounds like you're using your wife. Which is disgusting.
You guessed correctly. See the video titled "How to get any MAN you WANT: The UNBREAKABLE RULE". Your first wife broke the unbreakable rule.
Hi, if I may ask you for advice.. I think I'm that wife. I feel a lot of resentment but I understand disrespect shouldn't be the answer. What would you want from her to rethink divorce?
@smithies_jocks I must have married her sister. Her picture is in the dictionary next to “quarrelsome”. I’m stubborn, so it took me 42 years to divorce her.
You are so right!!!!! I was able to secure my hubby of 23 years by-“a way to a man’s heart was through his stomach.” He told his Italian mother that I cooked better than her!!
Incredible information, saving & downloading. Will rewatch many times I’m sure
“This one is for the ladies, and it’s a long one…”
this is not what she said
That's totally what she said
00:11 And here I thought it was too funny to be real. 😂
@@hondahirny LMAO its like a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow! LMAO
This is exactly correct. Why would I suffer the presense of a woman if she didn't add to my life.
I am a capable single for decades. I am my own bookkeeper, chef, maid, personal shopper, chauffeur, decorator, therapist, and friend. I can provide the same to men but none of my ex BFs welcome or appreciate what i could do. It can be tiring wearing different hats. The contractors I have found who do a good job, not flaky, and reasonable (money) I absolutely respect and are thankful. I think ppl who value honest work and fairness and do the same for others are in general, good seeds and keepers.
Ladies be careful too when you invest your time because plenty of guys will happily use it and then ditch you for the easier/younger/naive woman to be able to shine in her eyes.
When I was dating, I always asked myself: "Is she making my life easier?" Any answer other than an enthusiastic "Yes!" was unacceptable.
Women need to take heed of this perspective as well, and a lot of time wasted would be avoided in humanity I feel
@@suzannaflores1164 I’M NOT SURPRISED THAT MOST PEOPLE AGREEING WITH THIS ARE MEN. The thing about men is what they tell you WITH THEIR MOUTH IS DIFFERENT FROM WHAT THEY ACTUALLY GET MARRIED TO. Most men I know DONT HAVE THE WIVES DESCRIBED IN THIS VIDEO. Most men don’t even care how intelligent a woman is or the kind of questions she asks. In fact they don’t want a smarty pants. They want a woman who knows her place as a woman, will put her family before her career, knows how to cook, clean, raise kids, keep the home well and most of all KNOW HOW TO SHIT THE EFF UP! MEN DONT WANT A WIMAN WHO IS CONSTANTLY ASKING QUESTIONS AND BEING TOO INQUISITIVE. They find it annoying the less you say they better. But men will come on the internet and act like they like introspective women but they actually don’t end up marrying them. Why do you think most women who are interested in putting their best foot forward, and constantly strive for men to see how different they are from other women and to help men, end up single while ALL THE DUMB BLONDES NEXTDOOR STAY MARRIED?😂😂😂😂
Strange that I have never heard a man express this sentiment before.
Smart man!
I hope women really listen to this video. I was running late for my first date with my now GF. She offered to pay for my ticket and reserve our seats. This single act of generosity separated her from every other women I was dating and it’s the reason she’s my GF now. In every other area of life you have to give to receive value how is dating any different.
She’s just a GF. Put a ring on it bruh
You won't marry her though lol. Deep down the woman you really want wouldn't reserve anh seats and you'd still run after her...women that help men are only kept around out of convenience. This video is complete horse manure.
I am a woman who has been married for over 20 years to a GREAT guy… and your advice is really good!
Thank you so much for this video, I really needed to hear this today. Unfortunately it would have been much more useful to me about 21 months ago when I was actively making all of these mistakes. Hearing this message today however is serving as a gut check reminder as she and I are dealing with a little bit of time apart. 😂
This Video is absolute TRUTH BOMB💥. I enjoyed, laughed and grasped the concepts throughly.
LOVED IT ❤ Dr. Orion.
I am no longer in the dating scene. And this is not a brag or anything. I just thought it is natural. I have always had the mentality that I can get any man I want. It's just a matter of whether I want to pursue or not. And no, I am not a drop-dead gorgeous model, just average-looking. It's not about sex either. It's hard to explain. It's more like being a supportive and being an authentic human.
Learning human nature is always useful in any of our interactions with people. so even though you dont have romantic intentions, just absorb the info, because maybe you have friends where this is useful to understand 'what the heck are these people thinking?' LOL All the best on your journey!
Well, what you find to be authentic is bc of how you were programmed. Everyone is programmed, that’s how we form a society. You lucked out. Glad for you.
@@inconnu4961 Correct. I should have added that this is not applicable to dating only. This is applicable to everything and everyone. Be kind and supportive but don't lose yourself, and you will win almost anyone.
"no longer in the dating scene" - does that mean you are now in a committed and growing relationship that's heading in a right direction?
OR
you last relationship failed and you taking time out due to the exhaustion of it and life?
@@joshg854 I am in a committed relationship.
This is gold, absolute gold. Never thought of it like that.
I witnessed this in small examples. When a man is in his masculine self, a quality woman is compelled to fall into her feminine self.
i met an old female friend of mine, who we have been meeting unromantically for over 20 years now. We were out in a fast food place, and when we finished, I said I have a phonecall I have to make. Then she offered to take my tray together with hers to where it was supposed to be placed. It was such a simple act of kindness and usefulness, that I couldn't help but notice and appreciate it. She doesn't have anything to prove, she is a strong, professional woman. Still, she found it in herself to be supportive and useful in a simple situation. This is how you know if a woman is high quality or not. She doesn't have a problem defaulting to her feminine supporting, helping and caring self.
When "How to get any WOMAN you WANT: The master key"?
Make sure you have a lotttt of money
@@carlospita6442a metric fck ton of money and be in shape
Be handsome.
Be intelligent.
Be ambitious.
Have money.
Dress well.
Work out.
There ... the World is your oyster.
This one doesn't exists
There's 2 path for men.
Be tall
Be handsome
Or
If you don't have either then get your money up but unfortunately they'll probably only be with you for the resources and not actually be attracted to you, in other words, she's settling.
Listening to this as a man. This is gold
How to get any man you want:
1. Be mildly attractive.
2. Be in good shape.
3. Don't create conflict every single day.
4. Give him some love and attention also instead of just expecting everything to be about you.
How do I know if I'm attractive when men have called me both ugly and hot?
@@Mmmmkaaay”Ugly” is used by guys when you don’t wanna give it up, “hot” is said when we’re trying to get in your pants. The best way to gauge your SMV (sexual market value) is to see how many men want to take you out on dates, or approach you in public. We don’t take risks of approaching and rejection if you’re not “hot enough” to risk it.
@@sfrealestatedealmaker6001 That doesn't work in the Pacific Northwest. The men here are total wimps. In fact, when I do get approached, I say you're not from here are you? And they say : how'd you know?...and I say because you're talking to me.🙄🤣
@@Mmmmkaaayyou can thank the laws that put men in jail over a woman's words for that.
It's a self preservation tactic.
@@Tushar_Talwar_09 that only happens if it's on the job or in a school. There are plenty of men who sexually harass women in public who can't be prosecuted for that. Have you ever walked through a construction site or rowdy bar with a pretty woman?
I generally agree with this. One caveat though: if you're useful but the general compatibility isn't there, the man will waste your time energy until you get sick of his nonsense. My last relationship worked like this: he worked on his PhD which was in a field I had a Masters degree in and he didn't. And I helped him with other stuff too. So I was super useful but there was no way we'd have a shared long-term vision for us. Wasted time for me in hindsight, lots of benefit for him.
The title of this series is: "How to get any man you want". It doesn't address whether the man you want is any good . . .
A successful men can pay several secretaries to do that kind of useful work for much less price than give commitment to a women.
An average women can not get a successful men because the usefulness that an average women can offer to a successful men is low value and those services can be bought on the free market cheaper.
If a women is not attractive she is not going to attract a successful men by being useful because the successful men can outsource those kind of menial jobs easily.
That's the trick of this video. He can proudly say "you can get any man by being useful" and it is not a lie. Not every woman can get useful and he doesn't have to tell that to them.
Then the woman wasn't being all that useful, above and beyond a secretary. Remember, that could also include mind-blowing sex; not just making sandwiches.
Being useful goes way beyond secretarial support and maid services. That's just an inexact metaphor. It means giving support. Like, in empathy, interest, engagement, intimacy. Obviously a high value man can buy labour. Can he buy love? Clearly the support Orion is talking about means on the interpersonal level. It may come as a surprise to realise that most women don't provide these vital functions for a relationship with a good man. They are users just as much as men are.
@@dharmadasa66 Men got used to not receive any kind of empathy, interest or intimacy especially when they were not successful and women have no experience in giving any kind of empathy, interest to men (especially to not successful or not attractive men).
Not easy situation where a women do not know nothing how to give empathy and men do not know how it feel to receive real empathy.
The man who got successful without empathy from nobody and now have everything will be not easy to trick to relationship with a woman pretending to feel empathy for him.
The solution is not so easy how the doctor says. It is possible in some cases but not easy at all.
For the ladies:
The only way this can work is when the man has integrity and values. And I think this was implicit in the video.
That means, according to Orion's analogy, the man got following:
- Built a boat (resources)
- Learned to sail (competent)
- Charted a course (purpose)
(My recommended videos:
What is the sexual marketplace?
MEN need to have a PLAN WITH WOMEN
How to have EFFORTLESS RELATIONSHIPS with women)
Otherwise, if you serve the wrong man, you are in high risk of only be used because you were the woman he could afford at that time, dump you and then now he can upgrade to a "trophy wife" = you will end up very resentful. Be very very careful in your selection, there should be reciprocity on what both parties can provide to the relationship.
Please, don't be Barbara The Builder either :)
Omg I literally wrote a similar comment about Barb the Builder. Just proves that women should never take dating advice from men, particularly misogynistic men
I hear what he’s saying, but my experience was when I helped the man achieve his goals, when I tried to achieve my goals too I was given a hard time. Then when his goals were achieved, he cheated on me and/or left me for a woman that does ABSOLUTELY NOTHING for them!!!!
It’s the age old story…. A woman helps him get through school, get the promotion, achieve his life long dream. She’s doing this while working, housework, shopping and kids (by herself because he’s too busy with his goals). After his goal is achieved, she is left for another woman.
So no sir, this just doesn’t ring true to me!
Oh man, i am such a catch of a woman! 😂 i was just with an unhealthy man for 16 years being supportive and helping clear his debt and supporting him by making things easier for him at home so he could work on his career. Thanks so much for this perspective.