The biggest problem is paying for external support. What world do you live in? Take a break.. who is paying for it? My husband is in his ,17th year of Alzheimer's.. we are financially devastated. I take care of him. A caregiver comes Tuesday and Thursday for 5 hours I go to the store or my doctor. My friends and family work there is no one to hang out with. Reality is.. caregivers are pretty much on. Their own.
I have been taking care of my husband who is bedridden for 2 years .I rather have him than not. I'm stressed I'm responsible for every thing.i also have a ranch with critters also have a broken back .other health issues.i pray and put one foot in front of the the other.i do the best that I can.
Sending ❤ and prayers to you. I'm there too. Someday this will be over, and I will know in my heart that I did right by my mother. I choose to look forward to that day, and remind myself that this is only temporary.
I’ve been doing this for nearly two years-caring for my mother who has dementia and mobility issues. Without any help from my siblings of course. I get about five hours off per week. Ran a business before, but that has withered away into nothing. My sister said I should stop complaining because I get a wage for the caretaking though my mom’s insurance.... $10 and change per hour. My mom is approved for 150 hours per week but I can’t find anybody to work at that wage in our market. The kicker is, in spite of being approved for 150 hours of paid services per week, I can only bill for 40 even even though I’m here day and night save about five hours every Friday. Wouldn’t want us violating labor laws by putting in more than our weekly forty. Elders are forgotten about and caretakers are frequently berated by the Inattentive and absent family members. I hate this effing culture.
This is so true....I agree with you....I care for my Grandmother around the clock...whats paid isn't enough...$10 per hr... only 17hrs wkly....I don't have any time for my self, I have a son whom is a minor, grands, and my daughter has a disease....my Mom and 2 sisters doesn't realize it. 1 sister she'll come 2 or 3 times a month for the length of time suitable for her, my middle sister doesn't at all... I just pray it gets better for us caregivers, God bless you
@Michele Oliver, does your mom have a social worker? (Who knows what they are doing?) The social worker initially assigned to my mom was completely ineffectual, but I was able to figure some things out along the way. She has since passed away, last September, but those were challenging times. If your mom needs round-the-clock care, 17 hours per week is preposterous. What state are you in, if I may ask. There might be free recourses available that could provide someone to advocate for your mom’s (and your) needs.
@@l.slayer551 I'm in South Carolina....she now has a new caseworker...the old one was taking time... and now this new is suppose to be getting more hours authorized, I'm going on 2nd week, haven't heard anything.... My Grandmother is 98yrs old, July coming 99 yrs old, EVERYDAY IS HARDER, Dementia, weakness, chronic kidney disease, I'm so tired of doctors, nurses and NP telling me well she's 98 she's lived a good life, well I'm like hello, she's still alive, but I feel like I'm not being heard
@Michele Oliver, I thought I’d ask where you were on the unlikely chance we were in the same state (we’re not) so I could put you in contact with people who helped me. So, my mom had dementia and I did find a very unconventional approach that helped. I’m almost hesitant to bring it up, but microdosing with magic mushrooms. The dosages were much lower than what would be used recreationally. After about two or three weeks of being on that regimen, she started actually talking to me again and saying things like “I love you” and “thank you for all your help” and being in an overall much better mood. She started using coloring books and stuff like that. It didn’t cure her dementia, but it was kind of a miracle.
My Best Friend of 55 years . Has a Dad with dementia and they have placed him a VA home . But her husband of 40 years has had 9 Brain surgeries and now has dementia she has a Full plate and I sent this to her . Thank you .
My biggest problem actually, isn't taking care of my mother so much than it is my brothers and sisters (my dad died in 2003) take me for granted and make me take care our mother by saying that since my mom was always there for me growing up(I have a disability since birth) I should be taking care of her. i get sooo depressed and I really don't get that much help.
@@vanessabarker4901 Thank you, Vanessa, for your comment. I had the chance to watch this video again. When I wrote the comment, it was when my dad got hospitalized due to fever (non-COVID) and I was suffering from autonomic imbalance due to stress. I was taking care of both my mom and dad. They both have dementia so my mom would put away things my weak dad needs. I had to keep an eye on both of them all day because my dad might fall and my mom may undo things. Now, my dad and mom are both in the same care facility. My mom said she wants to be close to my dad, so I decided to do so. It is a big decision and costly. My mom is okay and her dementia has not progressed. I am slowly recovering and reaching out to my old friends. Vanessa, please hang in there. It is so stressful to do what we do. I still feel really guilty but I try to be positive and go out and do sports. FYI, my mom and dad both take MCT oil and it helps with dementia. I tried and my mom's condition improved. For example, she was having trouble dividing food into 3 portions, but after MCT, it became easy again.
@@chubbieminami3274 thank you for writing back so soon. I'm glad things have improved, well done on making the decisions. I know that can be so hard, my mum has dementia/ schizophrenia( possible side effect). Atm I'm a live in a carer but may get harder and she may need to go into care. I go through periods of being able to do sports and hire a sitter to go out one night a week. Sometimes I fall off and don't go to the gym or freeze up after bad episodes. I find it hard to reach out but am learning to. Sending lots of love to you and we'll done, two parents would be so challanging, I'm very proud of what your doing xx
@@vanessabarker4901 You ARE reaching out on TH-cam and I have been helped countless times from people I don't know. Most of my friends have not gone through similar things so I have stayed away. Your mum's condition sounds very difficult. I pray for you from far far away. ♡♡
@Chris Lim, yeah, challenging to the point of depletion. Incredible emotional and physical exhaustion. Bleak. Frustrating... A bit of ever so helpful advice I received from my sister, who doesn’t help in any way at all in the 24/7 caretaking role of our mother, told “you just gotta keep your chin up”. She told me this when stopping by for a two hour visit (the first in well over a year and a half) as she was passing through the area to go in a month-long camping trip.
In Puerto Rico we dont get paid for tsking care of our elders. Ive doing it for my mom for eight yrs now. Im getting to the point where sometimes I spent my 5 min shower time crying and screaming.. even my faith have been compromised. I love my motber to death. I will never lesve her because I know my brother will tske her to a home. But the truth is, im so tired and depressed i dont even know who I am anymore. But yes, i feel like one of those slaves that reach people bring from the islands promising gold and the moon and the star. Im a cancer patient myself and cant even take care of my appointments. Well. If it is tru that GOD is looking after me...he certanley needs better glasses prescriptions.
I am so depressed and I stay home, get in bed, and bawl, where my 85 yr mama can't hear me. I'm 49 have my mortgaged home and moved mama in to escape covid. I work from home so mama can't go to nursing home...I was raised jehovahs witness but I'm gay and so I'm really just hated by all my old religious acquaintances and I have no other friends because my mom doesn't approve at all and so ai disabled my Facebook and social networks so I won't embarrass my mom with my gay friends in front of her religious friends... The sicker she gets the more depressed I get. Once she passes, I'm selling my home and donating to save lions and then self-terminatimg. That religious upbringing taught me to hate myself in every facet and I have no goals, don't wanna go out, nor buy anything. I don't WANT any goals. Just wanna disappear forever. I took care of my papa at home until he passed from bone cancer, now my mama, and no help from my brother at all. If ai had been self-terminated I wouldn't have even had the discomfort of reliving it again right now. I was bullied in school would come home bruised so bad, molested by my brother at 6 yrs old and starting the car in the garage sure sounds good right now.
![[Live] : ONE FIGHT NIGHT 24 วันนี้!! “จาร์เร็ด vs กุสตาโว”](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/ENNA-fsT67c/mqdefault.jpg)
The biggest problem is paying for external support. What world do you live in? Take a break.. who is paying for it? My husband is in his ,17th year of Alzheimer's.. we are financially devastated. I take care of him. A caregiver comes Tuesday and Thursday for 5 hours I go to the store or my doctor. My friends and family work there is no one to hang out with. Reality is.. caregivers are pretty much on. Their own.
That’s so true. You lose yourself. This woman says you have a right to time off and time for yourself. Who does it when you don’t? I get it Gail.
🥺😪
Prayer🙏
I understand completely you wish yourself dead, so this stress would stop.
@@autumnrose6370prayer doesn't help.
I have been taking care of my husband who is bedridden for 2 years .I rather have him than not. I'm stressed I'm responsible for every thing.i also have a ranch with critters also have a broken back .other health issues.i pray and put one foot in front of the the other.i do the best that I can.
I can so relate to much of your situation. I hope you are doing ok.
Sending ❤ and prayers to you. I'm there too. Someday this will be over, and I will know in my heart that I did right by my mother. I choose to look forward to that day, and remind myself that this is only temporary.
I’ve been doing this for nearly two years-caring for my mother who has dementia and mobility issues. Without any help from my siblings of course. I get about five hours off per week. Ran a business before, but that has withered away into nothing. My sister said I should stop complaining because I get a wage for the caretaking though my mom’s insurance.... $10 and change per hour. My mom is approved for 150 hours per week but I can’t find anybody to work at that wage in our market. The kicker is, in spite of being approved for 150 hours of paid services per week, I can only bill for 40 even even though I’m here day and night save about five hours every Friday. Wouldn’t want us violating labor laws by putting in more than our weekly forty. Elders are forgotten about and caretakers are frequently berated by the Inattentive and absent family members. I hate this effing culture.
This is so true....I agree with you....I care for my Grandmother around the clock...whats paid isn't enough...$10 per hr... only 17hrs wkly....I don't have any time for my self, I have a son whom is a minor, grands, and my daughter has a disease....my Mom and 2 sisters doesn't realize it. 1 sister she'll come 2 or 3 times a month for the length of time suitable for her, my middle sister doesn't at all... I just pray it gets better for us caregivers, God bless you
@Michele Oliver, does your mom have a social worker? (Who knows what they are doing?) The social worker initially assigned to my mom was completely ineffectual, but I was able to figure some things out along the way. She has since passed away, last September, but those were challenging times. If your mom needs round-the-clock care, 17 hours per week is preposterous. What state are you in, if I may ask. There might be free recourses available that could provide someone to advocate for your mom’s (and your) needs.
@@l.slayer551 I'm in South Carolina....she now has a new caseworker...the old one was taking time... and now this new is suppose to be getting more hours authorized, I'm going on 2nd week, haven't heard anything.... My Grandmother is 98yrs old, July coming 99 yrs old, EVERYDAY IS HARDER, Dementia, weakness, chronic kidney disease, I'm so tired of doctors, nurses and NP telling me well she's 98 she's lived a good life, well I'm like hello, she's still alive, but I feel like I'm not being heard
I'm sorry for your lost...thank you for responding to me....I feel like I'm all cried out
@Michele Oliver, I thought I’d ask where you were on the unlikely chance we were in the same state (we’re not) so I could put you in contact with people who helped me. So, my mom had dementia and I did find a very unconventional approach that helped. I’m almost hesitant to bring it up, but microdosing with magic mushrooms. The dosages were much lower than what would be used recreationally. After about two or three weeks of being on that regimen, she started actually talking to me again and saying things like “I love you” and “thank you for all your help” and being in an overall much better mood. She started using coloring books and stuff like that. It didn’t cure her dementia, but it was kind of a miracle.
My Best Friend of 55 years . Has a Dad with dementia and they have placed him a VA home . But her husband of 40 years has had 9 Brain surgeries and now has dementia she has a Full plate and I sent this to her . Thank you .
Tell that to APS when they come stiffing around because your mom fell while you were taking “time out” for yourself.
Exactly.
Yeah i know all about it. Life sucks
My biggest problem actually, isn't taking care of my mother so much than it is my brothers and sisters (my dad died in 2003) take me for granted and make me take care our mother by saying that since my mom was always there for me growing up(I have a disability since birth) I should be taking care of her. i get sooo depressed and I really don't get that much help.
Thank you .
She was describing me in the first 90 seconds.
Me too , hope it gets better for you
@@vanessabarker4901 Thank you, Vanessa, for your comment. I had the chance to watch this video again. When I wrote the comment, it was when my dad got hospitalized due to fever (non-COVID) and I was suffering from autonomic imbalance due to stress. I was taking care of both my mom and dad. They both have dementia so my mom would put away things my weak dad needs. I had to keep an eye on both of them all day because my dad might fall and my mom may undo things. Now, my dad and mom are both in the same care facility. My mom said she wants to be close to my dad, so I decided to do so. It is a big decision and costly. My mom is okay and her dementia has not progressed. I am slowly recovering and reaching out to my old friends. Vanessa, please hang in there. It is so stressful to do what we do. I still feel really guilty but I try to be positive and go out and do sports. FYI, my mom and dad both take MCT oil and it helps with dementia. I tried and my mom's condition improved. For example, she was having trouble dividing food into 3 portions, but after MCT, it became easy again.
@@chubbieminami3274 thank you for writing back so soon. I'm glad things have improved, well done on making the decisions. I know that can be so hard, my mum has dementia/ schizophrenia( possible side effect). Atm I'm a live in a carer but may get harder and she may need to go into care. I go through periods of being able to do sports and hire a sitter to go out one night a week. Sometimes I fall off and don't go to the gym or freeze up after bad episodes. I find it hard to reach out but am learning to. Sending lots of love to you and we'll done, two parents would be so challanging, I'm very proud of what your doing xx
@@vanessabarker4901 You ARE reaching out on TH-cam and I have been helped countless times from people I don't know. Most of my friends have not gone through similar things so I have stayed away. Your mum's condition sounds very difficult. I pray for you from far far away. ♡♡
I can't do this anymore. 😔
Stay strong I promise it will get better if you ever want to talk lmk I'm always online :)
@@soci_ni
I appreciate it but how will it get better. Health usually declines. Both my parents are 82. My "life" my career is over.
Feel for you, @Chris Lim. It’s a challenging place to be.
@@l.slayer551
Thanks for acknowledging.
Challenging is a way of putting it.
😔🙏
@Chris Lim, yeah, challenging to the point of depletion. Incredible emotional and physical exhaustion. Bleak. Frustrating... A bit of ever so helpful advice I received from my sister, who doesn’t help in any way at all in the 24/7 caretaking role of our mother, told “you just gotta keep your chin up”. She told me this when stopping by for a two hour visit (the first in well over a year and a half) as she was passing through the area to go in a month-long camping trip.
I will not give up.bless you.
Thank you for the good info here 💕✨💕✨
In Puerto Rico we dont get paid for tsking care of our elders. Ive doing it for my mom for eight yrs now. Im getting to the point where sometimes I spent my 5 min shower time crying and screaming.. even my faith have been compromised. I love my motber to death. I will never lesve her because I know my brother will tske her to a home. But the truth is, im so tired and depressed i dont even know who I am anymore. But yes, i feel like one of those slaves that reach people bring from the islands promising gold and the moon and the star. Im a cancer patient myself and cant even take care of my appointments. Well. If it is tru that GOD is looking after me...he certanley needs better glasses prescriptions.
I am so depressed and I stay home, get in bed, and bawl, where my 85 yr mama can't hear me. I'm 49 have my mortgaged home and moved mama in to escape covid. I work from home so mama can't go to nursing home...I was raised jehovahs witness but I'm gay and so I'm really just hated by all my old religious acquaintances and I have no other friends because my mom doesn't approve at all and so ai disabled my Facebook and social networks so I won't embarrass my mom with my gay friends in front of her religious friends...
The sicker she gets the more depressed I get. Once she passes, I'm selling my home and donating to save lions and then self-terminatimg. That religious upbringing taught me to hate myself in every facet and I have no goals, don't wanna go out, nor buy anything. I don't WANT any goals. Just wanna disappear forever.
I took care of my papa at home until he passed from bone cancer, now my mama, and no help from my brother at all. If ai had been self-terminated I wouldn't have even had the discomfort of reliving it again right now. I was bullied in school would come home bruised so bad, molested by my brother at 6 yrs old and starting the car in the garage sure sounds good right now.