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Wait, That's Illegal! 1 Hour Of Almost Criminal Life Hacks Of r/AskReddit
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 17 มี.ค. 2020
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Hi! Just a quick observation: The cut sound (the one where it sounds like a cutting telephone line) in between each story is a bit too loud. I’d appreciate it if it was a little bit quieter as I usually turn these stories on to sleep. Thanks!
Pretty sure it's TV static but I watch it at night and also have problems with the noise whatever it might be
Random MA i usually fall asleep to these videos too! im surprised i’m not the only one
@@alisonespinoza1975 I wonder exactly how many people fall asleep to these videos
Aidan Chappelle it’s nice to hear the stories and the voice is nice
🤣
If you laugh at the way someone laughs always gush about how much you love their laugh and how happy it makes you to hear it. I mean GUSH too. Making someone self conscious of their laugh is akin to stomping puppies. Pure meanness.
That “ you dont give pretty girls tickets?”
“Yes. That’s correct. Sign here. Please”
Burn so much burn 🔥
OOF
something i read on tumblr but i think it applies: when you need to get somewhere, or even just in general when you want people to move out of your way when walking, wear comfortable shoes (i think their example was a set of combat-boot adjacent shoes), square your shoulders, and "walk like you've been sent to murder captain america". doing a "murder strut" will get people to move out of your way and it is very handy, because when i've tried the "look where you're going" i've still run into a lot of people (mostly men), but the murder strut totally works.
I listen to these while driving. Signed, a truck driver.
Me too.
Folding towels. Doing housework has never been more entertaining 😂
You too?
Same here
Lol same here.
TIL, keep a Get Out of Jail Free card in your vehicle and give it to a cop, you'll actually be let go
It's true, I was the get out of jail free card
I just thought about that
For the guy who never got a ticket.
3. Before the officer gets to your car, after turning all your interior lights on, make sure to keep your hands on the steering wheel the whole time unless obviously they ask you for license, registration or other info.
4. An obvious one, don’t like nervous.
You cant not look nervous if you're nervous. If you are nervous you are nervous.
In most scenarios you don't have to worry about looking nervous. People that never get pulled over are often freaking terrified when they actually do, and lots of perfectly innocent people get nervous around cops. Cops know this and experienced cops are used to it. Good cops know how to tell the difference
The garage fire story sounds like the muggle version of that scene in the last Harry Potter where the room of requirement caught fire and there were just towering piles of random crap flaming everywhere.
Big, BIG, props to the person who babysat the pet bird! I'm not sure he's aware of the the impossible odds of getting that bird to return and fly back into the house. Amazing♥️
Step dad told me this one, he pulled someone over and as he walked up to the car it sped off and that led to an all day chase till the car ran out of gas and began running, him and 12 other officers were chasing him and when they caught him he said “I really didn’t want to get a ticket so I drove till I couldn’t any longer”
Hour long videos are great for quarantine keep it up
Hell yeah they are.
posted this elsewhere, from a military-police fellow worker: "do you know why i pulled you over?" as he looked over his i.d.s, "because i was the only one going slow enough for you to catch." the trooper started laughing "i've never heard that one! slow down, have a good night!" and yes, he slowed down--he told me he could've been looking at a career-ending felony speeding citation. he was a gunner's mate (guns). 44:20 the link made of gold: remote desktop access. bwooohahahaha 1:10:21 sent a 5-car pile up in action to Troopers. never heard a happier Sgt Supervisor. yeh dashcam
I’ve only been pulled over once, and it was the worst possible scenario second to being arrested or shot. I had cut off a sheriff (he was in my blind spot, and being a newly licensed driver, I didn’t check it properly) and was pulled over. I then proceeded to nearly pee myself when I found that my license was not in its usual spot in my wallet. The officer (bright red and a stereotypical southern cop) told me I broke about 14 different laws (total BS to scare me). Luckily, due to my not being able to find my license, he was able to get dispatch to find my info. I was let off with a verbal warning and sat there after he left on the side of the road just sobbing.
I got pulled over for expired plates on November 3. My plates expired October 31.
Cop: Do you have your registration and proof of insurance?
Me: Yep.
Cop: You know it says here you have to pay by October 31?
Me: Yup. I thought I had paid.
Cop: Do you have your checking account on your phone?
Me: Yep. (Shows statement with clearly no payment having been made to the DMV).
Cop: Can you click on "Pay bill"?
Me: Okay...
Cop: Now write in the bill number and the amount on the registration slip.
Me: (Proceeds to pay my plates)
Cop: You know you can get towed for expired plates and fined $400, right?
Me: Yes, but I...
Cop: I'm not giving you a ticket, but I would advise you to keep your phone on you to show to other cops because the payment might take a few days to get through.
I got a warning for traveling around 73 on a 65 mph roadway. The cop was very professional but definitely an idiot. The warning was written up as Speeding in 55 mph zone. The road I was traveling is 65 mph from 75 miles east, to unknown west. Basically, due to his jurisdiction (area he is allowed to patrol) this road has NO areas limited to 55mph. He's serving dunkin donuts and coffee to the rest of the station for the next 2 months, and my record remains spotless. Still makes me chuckle
False advertisement it say an hour but it’s an hour and eleven minutes
Ok Karen
Name isn’t Karen it’s Kyle
12
No seriously, just do one step. Thinking about everything you have to do can be crippling. However if just do one little step, you usually do another and in a few months you'll wonder how you came so far. Its really true about my college program and when I don't loses sight of that I realize I've accomplished a lot
How does it feel though? To get out of a ticket? I am black so I never experienced it, nor will I ever.
Same.
I got pulled over by a cop once for speeding 60 in a 40. I quickly put bad boys on the radio on full blast when he got out. He had a good laugh and let me off with a warning.
I was fully willing to take the ticket as I knew what I was doing. I'm just extremely friendly and compliant with the police.
Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over.driver:..so it wouldn't be windy when we talked" lmao
The one where the cop followed the person home to go to the bathroom happened to me too. I had really bad periods 10 years ago and couldn't go for more than 10 min in a car w/o being a bloody dam. So I was rushing home and got busted. But the cop was nice and let me go home to clean up.
I had a friend who was a cop. He was posted up at a stop sign people blew through all the time. Around 2am, a car comes up and blows through the stop sign. Sees my friend. Slams into reverse back to the stop sign and stops. My friend threw on his lights and when he gets up to the window he was like “wtf was that?!?” And the guy was like “Well, I saw you and I figured I would go back and try it again!” “Have a nice night.” 😂😂😂
I just wasted an entire hour on this video. I'm not sure whether to thank myself for learning all of these semi-useless life hacks or scold myself for sitting here with a bucket of ice cream.
Whew!!!! I'm bailing at 17:51, I have yet to see anything resembling a criminal life hack, just stories of how people get out of tickets & those examples are wildly situational & won't apply to everyone.
Thank you for dying for my sins, of which there are plenty. You are a heroin (heroine? I never know which), I wish I could give you a zillion likes, but instead, please humbly accept the maximum I'm allowed to bestow upon your holy name
I listen to these while I'm working. Signed, someone that works at an American Flag Production company
A puppy that works at a flag company!
I got pulled over one day going twenty over. The cop comes up to the car and my daughter 3 at the time starts screaming he asks her what's wrong and she complained the sun is in her eyes. He chuckled and said we can't have that, handed me back my licience and says take her home 🤣😂
My ex bf was so dim he thought he was a genius. He once told me the police picked on him because he was good looking and they were jealous. I just said, no, it's because you're a bad driver with a lead foot and I don't want to die, why do you think I always drive us?. He was gobsmacked and I'm pretty sure he cried when I dropped him off. He later drove into someone's house drunk and speeding.
when your phone is at 100 percent and there is 100 comments on the dot
My out of ticket was crazy. Sons almost three. Potty training time. Hes yelling hes about to pee and it hurts to hold it. I am going twenty over 55 hwy speed to get there quicker. Barely any cars so I thought it'd be ok.... Nope. Cop out of no where right behind me. Cop can hear my son as he walked up bc Windows are down. Asked why. I said he's potty training and needs to pee. Cop asked if he could pull him out and allow him to pee on the side of the road i said sure. Officer removed son from his car seat. He also took a pee. I looked straight ahead. He put my son back into his seat and as he shut the door he said, please drive slower now, mom. Patted the top of the car and walked back to cruiser. I took the speed limit or slower all the way home which was only a mile or so away. We never exchanged info or anything else. So my son was my lucky charm that day.
Anybody complaining about "going after real criminals" when caught speeding through a school zone should pay the fine as follows:
Driver's clocked speed × $100.
Driver saying anything when handed the ticket ×2.
That will slow people down; or make them take an alternative route. Either way, no children have to die for a driver being inconvenienced. Same goes for passing a stopped, lights flashing school bus unloading/loading kids.
Good thing you're not a lawmaker
I wish I could be this stupid, life would be so much easier
So let's say an asshole cop pulls someone over for doing 26. they should pay 5,200? They are obviously gonna complain about 1 mph
Did doughnuts in the snow with my truck, I thought pretty good btw, cop pulls up, lights on, and says pretty slick fun out here.... I was like yeah... he says was the 4wd off and looked and yes.... he told me to put it into 4wd and keep her straight. I offered him a aronlad palmer ice tea he turned it down and I told him thank you and was on my way
The eye blinking works
“In the eyes of god we are” was the quickest wit 😂
My parents was tired of Me and my brother not doing chores so she made a chart of chores with point, This way games played by hours
Because of her bad spelling and a rule of repeat I found a kick out the trash written as kik the trash so I told brother my plan.
I was going to do every chore I can to take up 100 for a hour then did harder chores outside with higher points.
My brother and I confronted mother of her mistake but we said it was too late to correct.
My brother every day kicked the trash and watched whatever dad was watching, after a week I gathered 10,000 hours and the next week mowed the lawn for a EZ 200 before doing all chores and never played games for a month.
I gathered a 5 months of game time that my parents gave up and since then I played games daily with no complaining.
Brother had 1 month from kicking the trash but was glad it was over, as the big brother he looked up to me.
In highschool the IQ test showed I had a IQ of 141 and one foreign exchange student was 134.
I never tried and still graduated with D's and C's.
I almost shoplifted once. From the grocery store I worked for at the time no less. It was after my shift, 10 pm. I had bought some things and in my dazed state I almost forgot to pay. Fortunately for my record, I thought uhhh did I pay for this? I went back inside and the answer was no. I didn’t pay. Shit. I fixed that immediately. I also apologized profusely to my manager but she was confused
The military one caught me so off guard
I've never gotten a ticket. I'm a good talker. Lol.
gotten one, i'm 68. when we were in transit driver training, the instructor said "if you ever get pulled, and are doing something you were taught not to do here, the judge will say: You Should Have Known Better", and slam you good. i was ferrying an empty bus to start a routine route (right on red is legal here), and swung the bus out onto the road from an access lane, no oncoming Sunday morning traffic. Completely missed the new "No Turn on RED" signs. had SWAT Cpl following in my rear blind spot. wow, he had lotsa pretty lights. he got on the bus did the i.d. checks, flipped citation up onto his A&I clipbox. has me sign the ($200, 3 points off my license, mandatory safety training) citation, and on his way off the bus "You should have known better!"
Better knock on wood
I used to work at a superstore and I would literally grab a monster, sandwich or some other food, and whatever I wanted and just waltz up to the break room without paying. I would then finish my shift and take another drink with me outside through the "their prevention" barriers because they don't have jack shit goin beep on you, it's just for intimidation
My uncle pulled a man over for suspected DUI. Uncle he could smell the alcohol as he walked up to the vehicle. The driver's argument, he shouldn't be charged for breaking the law because he is too drunk to remember the law.
Many people have a reason to not like cops- the media certainly doesn’t do cops many favors- but what most people neglect is that cops are humans too. Crack a joke with the right one and you’ll get yourself out of a ticket. That doesn’t work for some though. You could be going 5, 15, or 30 mph over the speed limit but you have to understand that there’s no right answer.
I got pulled over for 15, I’m a law enforcement student, followed all my ex-cop teacher’s advice, and still got a ticket. She wasn’t a very happy trooper. 😅
And in another case, a fellow law enforcement student got a ticket and did roughly the exact same thing and got off. In fact the cop told my teacher that he was doing a good job teaching.
Anyhow, cops are people too. Some have a good sense of humor, some not. Some just gave good news to a family and some just got back from a murder scene. Stay safe and legal, friends. 😊
Had an offer pulled me over for a taillight out. He then asked me to open the trunk. When I did the office fixed the taillight. I thank him and went on my way.
47:46 that laugh creeped me out
Lol I like the public speaking tip towards the end. I was the weird kid with strange topics i do for fun and my benefits of smoking cigarettes speech had me nervous because it was me just trolling in high school so I went first and what the poster said was true lol
LOL! The benefits of smoking cigarettes.
You, I like your style.
What kind of freaking wart remover smells that bad? Cause I damn sure don't want to ever buy that kind!!
When I was about 6-7 I was in the call with my godmother, this tiny sassy Mexican woman. She is fucking awesome. She was speeding and got pulled over. I had never experienced anything like that and got scared and started crying. The cop comes up to the window and asks for her ID and stuff and my godmother gets all sassy and goes "Look what you did to my god baby. You scared her." He looked like a scolded child and apologized to us, handed her ID back and left. She bought me some treats at the store. I didn't even realize exactly what happened until later.
Here's an FYI for everyone: If you have a pimple you want gone quicker put some tooth paste on it and let it sit. The tooth paste will dry it out and shrink it. It might not be fully gone but it should be WAY less noticeable. You're welcome! 😁
Oooooo I have a good I got away with that story
I was driving my friends grandpa's side by side and I was flooring it around the backyard driving it like a rally car so I'm taking this turn of where I ripped up the died and noticed that I was losing speed so I have the bright idea to floor it next time I take the corner so I do just that and I bring it up on 2 wheels almost rolling it and crushing my friends arm but I manage to bring it back on all fours but I crash into an old trailer destroying the trailer and getting the side by side stuck so my friend and I hop out to inspect the vehicle and we find that there is no damage so we proceed to get it unstuck and we drive it back to park it
4:12 pretty young girls get away with murder.
What’s the difference between criminal and felony?
Love is magic
love is maggick
These aren’t life hacks they’re stories
If I had to take a crap I'm speeding.
Unfortunately you cannot claim the lottery under not your name in some states; wi for example.
Does wart remover smell that bad?
love is magic my romance doggo
I've learned so much
I shit a 80x80 brick shit house everytime I get pulled over by a cop, only to find out they are warning me about wildlife crossing and or just to check my shot.
⠄⡄⡆⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡤⠄⠒⠄⠄⠄⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣄⣠⠄ ⢱⣼⣿⠇⢀⠄⠄⠄⡰⠅⢀⣴⣾⡿⠿⢷⠝⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⡝ ⠸⣿⣿⠗⠋⠄⠄⠠⠂⠄⣿⣿⡧⢒⣂⣼⣿⣄⡚⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠲⣿⣿⡯ ⠄⣿⡿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⣩⣤⣵⡠⡺⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⠃ ⠄⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⢀⡘⣿⣿⣿⣧⠋⠖⠚⠂⢹⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣾⣿⠄ ⠄⣿⣷⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⣏⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⡲⠾⢻⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⡟⠄ ⠄⢹⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⢫⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠓⠓⡘⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣿⣿⠁⠄ ⠄⠈⠿⠿⠿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⠿⠿⠿⠟⠉⠄⠄⠹⠇⠄⠄⠄⠺⠿⠿⠏⠄⠄
I laugh like a dying donkey and I make fun of it, my family makes fun of it, and my close friends make fun of it. Anyone else? They get death stares from all friends and family and me.
He put the fire out using newspapers duh.
Accidentally texted my best friend “hey babe” he just responded with wrong person he laughed at me for a week
I had a get out of jail Free card in my wallet the first I got booked it didn't work LoL 😅
I tried plumping my breast together but it didn't work smh!!!
We call that the "knife hand".
Why do cops always say "at a high rate of speed" instead of just "high speed"?
Pretty sure they're speaking in "Law Talk"
Because if "rate" isn't used, it could be misinterpreted as a DUI.
Hmmm maybe, he peed on the fire
Be me speeding at about 2 am trying to get home before my parents. Has liquid ass, geta pulled over.
Me: sprays six ass sprayes on pants and door near window.
Cop walks up: omg wtf is that Smell?
I shit myself i say. Lets me go after about 30 seconds with a warning saying slow it down.
Is it just me or do people listen to these vids while working or something
I listen when I play minecraft
I use it when I'm working my tagging jobs. But most store reception sucks and it leaves me to my own thoughts. Not as much fun.
@@RhondaB4thesong that sucks man, hopefully you can find a good carrier for you lol
Look, we're all white here 🤣🤣
0:32 This is crap. He is anesthesiologist, so what? Speeding could get him injured or dead. That wouldn't be good for the guy who had got shot.
16:28 is far less believable imo. Feels completely fake
Your brother peed that fire out
Amazes me that veterans get special treatment. Doesn’t happen here.
58Kym it only matters to me if they helped if your one of the people that lie and lie to get out of the army you don’t deserve a fiscont
11.15 ... BURN!!!!!
Someone else listening in 2x speed?
4:04 hahah Toyota Corona
I think this screen reader has seen too much shit on the Coronavirus...
What is the name of this video?
It won't show up on my device
And third
Not a cop, but the cop that pulled me over had hit us up on Grindr the day before. I called him by his user name. He said he'd give me a warning and left.
8th comment
22 comment
I just want to know what kind of absolute madlad is still using wired headphones in 2020
so instead of blood butt you were mud butt -___- both are bad
Nf
I know I just killed 269 people but……… I’m a good Christian 😇
Second
This whole thing is a fraud. The writing style is tool similar. Fast forward 2 seconds and the writer says Fast forward again. Fast forward again and I checked out.
2nd!
9th lol
None of these are "life hacks" lmfao
First
First bitches
Love is magic
Love is magic