@@ChommikenyaThank you for your channel and the contents. I've seen many areas which I have erred. I am so blessed learning all these now. Going forward, I am being intentional and I will never put myself at a spot to be kept as a place holder again. Never again 😊🙌🏾
Wow good for you girl. I blocked one guy too, I observed his behavior and realize there's a lot of things I want him to change, one example being he loves cussing its so offputting. I don't believe in changing a man especially if there's so much to change, so i blocked. Saves me time and brings me so much peace.
It’s hard to be a pick me, when you have a job and meetings to go to, on top of that, having a full blown migraine that accompanys you almost every single day. I admit, I use to obsess over every guy I wanted, but it has reduced because I have improved my life, know who I am and what I want in a guy, and what they realistically can give me compared to what is in my head.
There are a lot of desperate, emotionally and/or financially broke, loser "Pick me" type men as well. They are often divorced and need a mommy for their kids...or themselves 🙄🤣
I have a coworker who does this, and its the first thing i noticed. Also a former pick me, grew out of that real quick. Don't know if this lightweight makes me a mean girl cause i do enjoy the fact that she needs male validation, and it shows out loud like SO LOUD. But she is always defending the males doesnt matter if you're joking she will insert herself and say "dont talk to him like that," also likes that our boss touches her inappropriately and deems it a bonus.. 👀 and its weird so weird. The vibes at work get weird and she will tell us about it happening every once in a while if we werent on shift when it happened.... like its a flex.
I think that most of the people who talks about "pick me girl" don't know the meaning. Seriously, can we stop trying to put people in boxes? The human mind is so complex, dam.n I don't seek to understand anymore 🙌🏾 I'm done
I wish I had non pick me friends. Even when giving the chance to do the same thing that they do with the guys but they can’t with the girls and they get bugged if they have to share the attention 😂
I really don't see the attraction to men on a romantic level fr, why would you wanna be with someone who goes out of their way to avoid you AT BEST. And abuses you at worst. Straight women: do you honestly find independent, distant men romantically attractive and fulfilling to be with? Trying to figure out if I'm over thinking this, I think I'm bi, I definitely s3xually attracted to men to some extent, but romantically? As soon as I get to know the real them I lose interest: the fantasy person is what excites me. I'm trying to figure out if I am actually really a lesbian or I just don't like men? (but still find some of them hot, psychically?) does that make sense? I know this has nothing to do with the video, but I'm hearing the way women are describing men in this video and I'm like... do some women actually find that romantic relationship type appealing? Baffled.
I know for me it comes from growing up in an abusive family. It's hard for some of us to know what love really is. As a kid, I worked so hard to get my parents to love me. I was a perfectionist. Cleaning, cooking, doing the laundry, making excellent grades, etc. That sort of carried over to trying to make a man love me. At 56 years old, I finally understand that there is nothing I can do to make anyone love me. It is sad that I wasted so much of my life in that mode. I do hope younger women are listening and learning. I have stopped caring what a damn man thinks and I am so much happier!!!!!
I have guy friends and don’t mind being accused as a pick-me because I’m technically not ( I have a harem of female close friends lol), there are 2 problems I see with girls who cannot befriend other girls. The first problem is that they are not in their ideal girl-zone, the girls around them are too dramatic (sadly I have seen un-talk-with-able girls, sounding like a pick-me rn but facts are facts), that means they don’t have chance to meet girls who vibes with them. The other problem is that they subconsciously center men, I was talking with a girl who tell everyone that she found it difficult to befriend girls, I noticed that when she and I were talking, if a male friend appeared, she would completely ditch me to talk with that dude, like I was not there anymore, and she couldn’t shift her focus from that dude, although the dude noticed me and interacted with me, she wouldn’t consider me in that convo
This may be a controversial opinion…but a lot of these women are defining “pick me’s” as basically stay at home moms or women who are fulfilling traditional roles. It’s icky to me to be calling women who have been traumatized by growing up in a society that conditions them to accept neglect & abuse and mistreatment from men “pick me’s” when in reality a lot of women date men who treat them nicely and promise them things and then as soon as they get married these men turn out to be abusers, narcissists, and just awful men. This is not these women’s fault, it’s men’s tactic for trapping women. I think it’s incredibly helpful to share advice to young women so they can avoid the trap that MILLIONS of women fall into, but to call them “pick me’s” saying it’s their fault etc isn’t the way. A pick me is a mean girl who puts other girls down to impress boys, not a woman trapped in an abusive relationship…c’mon guys….smh
Yes I agree a pick me is a mean girl who puts other girls down to impress boys But also you can be a pickmesha in a relationship sorry to tell you that but it's true excluding the abuse.
Pick me is also a woman that is male identified. Which means that she puts men's interest/ above women's and kids's. Religious women(including traditional women) who follow male made monotheists religions are by automatically pick mes/male identified. Its not about the women who get abused. Gats a different story. But you can be an abused women and try to convince young girls to accept bad treatment from men(victimtim blaming, grape, accepting cheating, etc), that would fall into pickmeism. Traditionally, womem have always worked. Pre monotheism religions, women would hunt, domesticated wolves etc. Sahm is a 1950s concept that only mosly ww did. And it didnt end well for them. High number of sahm were alchoolics and had depression. Women and kids have always worked. Its a myth that women in all history stayed in the home.
Pickme's can be anyone married or not. Pickme's are male centered and male identified and they expect, pray for, hope, wish sometimes demand reciprocity and hardly ever get reciprocity in return. Men use these women as servants and because she's so male identified it makes it easy for men to exploit her in every way possible. We are programmed to be other oriented which doesn't serve women at all. I'm a reformed pickme and I do nothing for a man until all my needs are met FIRST. He can hit the door if he don't like it.
I disagree with the blonde girl, 15:26 (she has the thinking be a black cat not a golden retriever) in the beginning and while dating, a man should match your energy and if he is inconsistent and wants his freedom then he should stay single. When you are married sure each person has freedom only because you can’t sustain a long term marriage without some separation of self but dating should be the best part of the relationship and the energy should match it’s what leads you to want to marry. Don’t settle for a lack luster relationship, a man who wants freedom when your just dating, or a man who wants to be inconsistent he’s gonna give you the most in the first 3 years it’s okay to demand the same energy. And if they they’re picking the gold diggers and the girls that don’t want them that’s just because they have unhealed trauma themselves. Not all guys pick those girls.
I agree but I think the Blonde woman was just giving a bad example. I know what she is talking about. They really demand their pound of flesh after awhile.
There is a problem in this world.Girls what happens to you? Dont be pick me-be independent a strong women-dont be too strong - be flexible- dont be too flexible- you should be strong and stoic and have your own values etc -and round and round and round. When we ll stop ✋ it? To blame each other? Be who you want to be- pick me it is a period of life of growing up both men and women. Our culture and media dictate us how to live what to dream, there are a lot of pick me she or he because our tv or smart phone show us a pick me pictures , pick me clothes pick me lifestyle etc.
Having a hard time making female friends and having an easier time getting along with guys doesn’t automatically make me a pick-me. The typical woman is often so catty, superficial and judgemental. And my being a tomboy doesn’t help, it leaves so little to relate to. I hate fashion. And I hate makeup, it’s basically painting lies on your face. Only my combat boots have high heels. My friendships with guys usually never last because they end up catching feelings for ME and chasing ME, NOT the other way around 🤭
And the mom would give that car to her partner to win him over, I've seen that before. You can't save someone who doesn't want to be saved ! When she really wants to, Mom will use her resources and ask for help and will escape. I'm a former pick me who escaped...
pick me = male indentified. If you follow monotheist religions(christiannity, islam, judaism), MEN-made religions, you are male identified(pick me). Knowing damn well how to male ideologies/religions treated women and kids for centuries but still want to be part of those organizations...
Is there any female centered religion? Or am I not allowed to believe in anything? Reading the Bible, I never felt that Jesus was misogynistic. I know the church became men centered, but I still believe in Jesus, and when praying, I try to put a huge focus on his mother Mary ❤
@@andreasunshine8002 Pre monoteist religions were female centered. Also, the church has always been mysoginistic. It didnt "became" one. Jesus should have stayed seperate from the church. He was a true feminist who supported women and even got financed by women. That is true. But to say someone is still a chrisitan, it means that you continue to keep that sexist organisation alive.
Clearly known a nothing about religion and how important the women are in Judaism. Clearly never read the book of Esther which is FINE. Esther has a whole holiday dedicated to her work. But woMEN are also MEN and trying to steer people away from Gd like you have authority is giving pick me
These women are telling other women to not be doormats. So are you saying women should be doormats? 😂 I guess i know who to listen to but thank you for your kind advice.
"Besides him stealing your purse" I'm cracking up lolol
😂 Thank you for watching ❤️
Me too here, I am just lolling with that. And she said it with all seriousness and a stern face 😂😂😂
@@ChommikenyaThank you for your channel and the contents. I've seen many areas which I have erred. I am so blessed learning all these now. Going forward, I am being intentional and I will never put myself at a spot to be kept as a place holder again. Never again 😊🙌🏾
😂😂😂
I just blocked three low effort, low value men who were in my DMs and I feel amazing ❤🎉
Yay - as an old ass women I love that the younger generation isn’t gonna waste years with these fools ❤ Glow up Ladies- your the prize ❤
@@teresasanchez7164 forever grateful to the Queens teaching us from experience 💖 👑
Yes!!!🙌
Wow good for you girl. I blocked one guy too, I observed his behavior and realize there's a lot of things I want him to change, one example being he loves cussing its so offputting. I don't believe in changing a man especially if there's so much to change, so i blocked. Saves me time and brings me so much peace.
It’s hard to be a pick me, when you have a job and meetings to go to, on top of that, having a full blown migraine that accompanys you almost every single day. I admit, I use to obsess over every guy I wanted, but it has reduced because I have improved my life, know who I am and what I want in a guy, and what they realistically can give me compared to what is in my head.
Have you tried hijama wet cupping? Heard it’s supposed to greatly help with migraines.
There are a lot of desperate, emotionally and/or financially broke, loser "Pick me" type men as well. They are often divorced and need a mommy for their kids...or themselves 🙄🤣
I definitely agree with that potential stuff , i feel for it once never again 😂
So you agree 💯
Thank you for watching ❤️
I have a coworker who does this, and its the first thing i noticed. Also a former pick me, grew out of that real quick. Don't know if this lightweight makes me a mean girl cause i do enjoy the fact that she needs male validation, and it shows out loud like SO LOUD. But she is always defending the males doesnt matter if you're joking she will insert herself and say "dont talk to him like that," also likes that our boss touches her inappropriately and deems it a bonus.. 👀 and its weird so weird. The vibes at work get weird and she will tell us about it happening every once in a while if we werent on shift when it happened.... like its a flex.
She will learn eventually!! I hope
Hey thank you for watching & sharing ❤️
I agree with the girl who mentioned her mother was a pick-me. Always believe a man when he shows you who is he is and Never fall for his potential.
That is very true
Believe him!!!
I think that most of the people who talks about "pick me girl" don't know the meaning.
Seriously, can we stop trying to put people in boxes? The human mind is so complex, dam.n
I don't seek to understand anymore 🙌🏾 I'm done
North America is fill with pick me because men take literally 0 initiatives
Speak louder girlfriend.
And they refuse to be responsible
This is my biggest problem with them.
Or aren't consistent if they do.
I don’t chase them honey they chase me I’m feminine tho.
Period babes
Thank you for watching ❤️
I wish I had non pick me friends. Even when giving the chance to do the same thing that they do with the guys but they can’t with the girls and they get bugged if they have to share the attention 😂
I really don't see the attraction to men on a romantic level fr, why would you wanna be with someone who goes out of their way to avoid you AT BEST. And abuses you at worst. Straight women: do you honestly find independent, distant men romantically attractive and fulfilling to be with? Trying to figure out if I'm over thinking this, I think I'm bi, I definitely s3xually attracted to men to some extent, but romantically? As soon as I get to know the real them I lose interest: the fantasy person is what excites me. I'm trying to figure out if I am actually really a lesbian or I just don't like men? (but still find some of them hot, psychically?) does that make sense? I know this has nothing to do with the video, but I'm hearing the way women are describing men in this video and I'm like... do some women actually find that romantic relationship type appealing? Baffled.
I know for me it comes from growing up in an abusive family. It's hard for some of us to know what love really is. As a kid, I worked so hard to get my parents to love me. I was a perfectionist. Cleaning, cooking, doing the laundry, making excellent grades, etc. That sort of carried over to trying to make a man love me. At 56 years old, I finally understand that there is nothing I can do to make anyone love me. It is sad that I wasted so much of my life in that mode. I do hope younger women are listening and learning. I have stopped caring what a damn man thinks and I am so much happier!!!!!
That last chick had the best tips.. and saying that as a 47yr old.
Thank you for watching ❤️
Could a pick me be considered internalized misogyny? Just a thought.
I have guy friends and don’t mind being accused as a pick-me because I’m technically not ( I have a harem of female close friends lol), there are 2 problems I see with girls who cannot befriend other girls. The first problem is that they are not in their ideal girl-zone, the girls around them are too dramatic (sadly I have seen un-talk-with-able girls, sounding like a pick-me rn but facts are facts), that means they don’t have chance to meet girls who vibes with them. The other problem is that they subconsciously center men, I was talking with a girl who tell everyone that she found it difficult to befriend girls, I noticed that when she and I were talking, if a male friend appeared, she would completely ditch me to talk with that dude, like I was not there anymore, and she couldn’t shift her focus from that dude, although the dude noticed me and interacted with me, she wouldn’t consider me in that convo
This may be a controversial opinion…but a lot of these women are defining “pick me’s” as basically stay at home moms or women who are fulfilling traditional roles. It’s icky to me to be calling women who have been traumatized by growing up in a society that conditions them to accept neglect & abuse and mistreatment from men “pick me’s” when in reality a lot of women date men who treat them nicely and promise them things and then as soon as they get married these men turn out to be abusers, narcissists, and just awful men. This is not these women’s fault, it’s men’s tactic for trapping women. I think it’s incredibly helpful to share advice to young women so they can avoid the trap that MILLIONS of women fall into, but to call them “pick me’s” saying it’s their fault etc isn’t the way. A pick me is a mean girl who puts other girls down to impress boys, not a woman trapped in an abusive relationship…c’mon guys….smh
Yes I agree a pick me is a mean girl who puts other girls down to impress boys
But also you can be a pickmesha in a relationship sorry to tell you that but it's true excluding the abuse.
Pick me is also a woman that is male identified. Which means that she puts men's interest/ above women's and kids's.
Religious women(including traditional women) who follow male made monotheists religions are by automatically pick mes/male identified.
Its not about the women who get abused. Gats a different story. But you can be an abused women and try to convince young girls to accept bad treatment from men(victimtim blaming, grape, accepting cheating, etc), that would fall into pickmeism.
Traditionally, womem have always worked. Pre monotheism religions, women would hunt, domesticated wolves etc. Sahm is a 1950s concept that only mosly ww did. And it didnt end well for them. High number of sahm were alchoolics and had depression.
Women and kids have always worked. Its a myth that women in all history stayed in the home.
Pickme's can be anyone married or not. Pickme's are male centered and male identified and they expect, pray for, hope, wish sometimes demand reciprocity and hardly ever get reciprocity in return. Men use these women as servants and because she's so male identified it makes it easy for men to exploit her in every way possible. We are programmed to be other oriented which doesn't serve women at all. I'm a reformed pickme and I do nothing for a man until all my needs are met FIRST. He can hit the door if he don't like it.
I disagree with the blonde girl, 15:26 (she has the thinking be a black cat not a golden retriever) in the beginning and while dating, a man should match your energy and if he is inconsistent and wants his freedom then he should stay single. When you are married sure each person has freedom only because you can’t sustain a long term marriage without some separation of self but dating should be the best part of the relationship and the energy should match it’s what leads you to want to marry. Don’t settle for a lack luster relationship, a man who wants freedom when your just dating, or a man who wants to be inconsistent he’s gonna give you the most in the first 3 years it’s okay to demand the same energy. And if they they’re picking the gold diggers and the girls that don’t want them that’s just because they have unhealed trauma themselves. Not all guys pick those girls.
I agree but I think the Blonde woman was just giving a bad example. I know what she is talking about. They really demand their pound of flesh after awhile.
There is a problem in this world.Girls what happens to you? Dont be pick me-be independent a strong women-dont be too strong - be flexible- dont be too flexible- you should be strong and stoic and have your own values etc -and round and round and round. When we ll stop ✋ it? To blame each other? Be who you want to be- pick me it is a period of life of growing up both men and women. Our culture and media dictate us how to live what to dream, there are a lot of pick me she or he because our tv or smart phone show us a pick me pictures , pick me clothes pick me lifestyle etc.
10:53 YES!
Thank you for watching
They need to come up with another name for a simp girl. I'm glad my name doesn't stop at meshia its for me and me only😂
😂😂 Thank you for watching
A pick me girl is pretty much the female equivalent of a nice guy.
Yupp
Pickmesha😂
The First Lady sheraseven invested that term she started this whole movement
Thank you for watching ❤️
Thank goodness I'm not a pick me🙌
Thank you for watching ❤️
I realise that my mom is also pick me and is not good I don't wanna be like her
Thank you for watching ❤️
Having a hard time making female friends and having an easier time getting along with guys doesn’t automatically make me a pick-me. The typical woman is often so catty, superficial and judgemental. And my being a tomboy doesn’t help, it leaves so little to relate to. I hate fashion. And I hate makeup, it’s basically painting lies on your face. Only my combat boots have high heels.
My friendships with guys usually never last because they end up catching feelings for ME and chasing ME, NOT the other way around 🤭
Pickmeren and Pickmesha 😂
The track at 08:30 - Does anybody know what it is?
9:41
I met her
Thank you for watching ❤️
miss nest egg could buy her mum a car
And the mom would give that car to her partner to win him over, I've seen that before. You can't save someone who doesn't want to be saved ! When she really wants to, Mom will use her resources and ask for help and will escape. I'm a former pick me who escaped...
I guess im a pickmesha 🤷♀️
😂😂 sorry what?!
Lmao …😂
🎉🎉🎉
Thank you for watching ❤️
pick me = male indentified. If you follow monotheist religions(christiannity, islam, judaism), MEN-made religions, you are male identified(pick me). Knowing damn well how to male ideologies/religions treated women and kids for centuries but still want to be part of those organizations...
Is there any female centered religion? Or am I not allowed to believe in anything?
Reading the Bible, I never felt that Jesus was misogynistic. I know the church became men centered, but I still believe in Jesus, and when praying, I try to put a huge focus on his mother Mary ❤
Ohh go away Jezebel.
@@andreasunshine8002 Pre monoteist religions were female centered.
Also, the church has always been mysoginistic. It didnt "became" one.
Jesus should have stayed seperate from the church. He was a true feminist who supported women and even got financed by women. That is true. But to say someone is still a chrisitan, it means that you continue to keep that sexist organisation alive.
So true.
Clearly known a nothing about religion and how important the women are in Judaism. Clearly never read the book of Esther which is FINE. Esther has a whole holiday dedicated to her work. But woMEN are also MEN and trying to steer people away from Gd like you have authority is giving pick me
What if you don’t take no one’s side? Like I dislike both…like women can be two-faced, while men are narcissists. 🤷🏽♀️
Shera Seven gained some weight 👀
She was always like that
You're focusing on the wrong things honey 😅!!
That’s actually a very old video
Her wisdom should be the focus
Why is that relevant whether it is true or not??
Women came up with the term “pick me.” Can we all just stop hating on other women?
Lies all lies by these women ladies be careful who you listen to.
Can you elaborate? 🤔
Yes be careful listening to someone just like yourself. 😂
It's clear you disagree with the ladies
Tell us why?
These women are telling other women to not be doormats. So are you saying women should be doormats? 😂
I guess i know who to listen to but thank you for your kind advice.