Disabled folks working twice as hard & still not appreciated. Not worth it |
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 15 พ.ค. 2024
- This week’s vlog is the beginning of an emotional two weeks. This week I focus on walking away from some unhealthy work expectations. After working round the clock 7 days a week for weeks my body started to tell me it was going to revolt. When the choice is my health or my job that is an easy choice.
This vlog is basically a mood. The moment that I decided, even though I hear the voices in my head telling me I need to work twice as hard as able bodied folk to get ahead, it ain't true. It's a lie.
So I reclaimed my power and my time this week. Come with me on that journey and join the conversation. Tell me about your experiences being overworked by someone who doesn't appreciate that effort? How did you react?
Hang in there Crohnies and I'll see you next week!
Chapters -
00:00 - Burn out equals freedom
00:39 - Self doubt
02:08 - Deadlines missed
03:05 - Sick from work
04:40 - Brylee break
05:45 Another day another class
06:37 - Stuff disabled folks think about
07:50 - Universal pressures
08:50 - Shame in asking for help?
09:38 - Hit a wall
10:01 - What I learned about me
10:48 - Desert of feedback
11:07 - No one gives you a job
12:02 - Lessons
13:30 - Do it for those that care
14:15 - Do you boo
14:55 - Good enough?
#crohnsdisease #crohnswarrior #chronicillnesslife #disabilitypride
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Good causes:
Crohn's & Colitis Foundation
www.crohnscolitisfoundation.org/
Equality Federation:
www.equalityfederation.org/
It Gets Better:
itgetsbetter.org/
Gill Foundation:
gillfoundation.org/
The Trevor Project:
www.thetrevorproject.org/
National Queer and Trans Therapists of Color Network:
www.nqttcn.com/
GLSEN:
www.glsen.org/
Black Lives Matter:
blacklivesmatter.com/
The Conscious Kid:
www.theconsciouskid.org/
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CONNECT WITH BARRETT LAURIE
Website-
barrettlaurie.com/
Twitter-
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/ barrett_laurie
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Finally , maybe I can finally say this to someone who understands what I'm saying. I'm 64 and retired now but as a kid I had a cliff accint and ened up with a Tramatic brain injury.I needed speach therapy, I was terminal for 3 months with brain inflammation , raging IBS and all the rewards that reaps upon you.School was awful, bullies and in the end I picked up 2 degrees and a Government position and a real pretty girl. Demi Moore people say and ........so, I have to ask them ? ...............Early Demi or late Demi ?
I CONCLUDE THAT: That it's not a fair fight when we get up everyday with a diability and try to manage it to be functional at work. Strees is bad for every worker but office politics and a bad boss can incapacitate us.Were always white knucking it, ignoring the symtoms and just trying to get home to our cave to lick our wounds.
So, when people think this circus act is easy it's off / putting.
I’m so proud of you for enduring all you have and still setting (and exceeding) even your own expectations. That’s the inspiration! That’s what I want to get back to. Being good enough for me. Silly as that sounds.
Yes to the white knuckling it, ignoring pain, and doing our best to adapt to a world that isn’t very understanding of those needing accommodations for a game rigged against us.
Thanks for stopping by and hanging out. We get it around here. Hug friend and hope I see you in the comments soon. 💜💯
@@BarrettLaurie Thank YOU,... for listening I finally feel heard.Everyone in life wants to be heard and understood. GOD BLESS
I just got home yesterday from ten days assisting my friend in a raging flare. She finally quit her last part time job and applied for disability. We were off grid and got snowed in! I can totally understand the work thing, she has been trying to prove she can keep up or at least contribute for the last 15 years. Her husband has been encouraging her to apply for disability and he is supportive. However he works away from home days at a time, so I am splitting my time between houses, trying to supply some assistance while he is gone. She moved me into her home after my accident last summer for several weeks, and I am so happy to be able to return the favor. Never been so happy to be retired!
Remember, Barrett, you are your first priority. Those co-workers have no idea what you are dealing with. Hang in there. Love you! 💜💜💜💜
Thank you for this Regina. I can’t tell you how welcome this comment was to this video. So appreciate the advice.
Your friend is lucky to have you but it sounds like you’re lucky to have each other! 💜❤️💜🫶🏻
Word on all of this. I've not worked really since I became disabled but thinking about it I always had my lung condition and I remember having to explain in the interview that I would take a lot of sick days and there wasn't anything I could do about that. Just the way it was for me 😅
That’s awesome you put it all out there early. That’s the way to do. Set the expectations early.
I’m sad it took me to the middle of my career to figure out, “hey boundaries are effective at work too.” 😏
Thanks for saying hey. Loved your video this week! 🫶🏻
Good for you setting boundaries
I totally agree! 💜💯
Totally agree too, having shoveled way too much, like trying to fill a black hole from where nothing ever returns. 🥺🕳 Lessons: 1. Self-care isn't egoism. 2. Self-care can mean violating social norms as well as your own moral code, but it's okay. 3. Be kind and helpful, but don't let yourself exploit.
@@justincase4937 these are so great! Wish I could like them 10X!!
@@BarrettLaurie 💯👍 And music is good for relieving stress. I'm using it a lot these days due to my Alzheimers ill mom, for myself when I'm alone and for her for whom I play music from her youth - from her reaction and what she says I know that it helps her recalling happy memories. Sometimes she's even able to sing along!
@@justincase4937 that’s lovely. I hadn’t heard of this before now. 💜💯
❤❤❤❤❤
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I'm sorry work was tough and exhausting. Great mantras for finding a balance at work. Honestly, even if a company does recognize you putting in that extra time and decides to promote you, it is almost always not worth the additional effort put in. The Frog and the Scorpion is a great story equivalent for my time at a company I do not respect. Why did that company sting me until we both drowned crossing the river? Because it is the company's nature.
This is such a great analogy I never considered. I love the institution, maybe I’m not on the right team. Thats a tough one to come to realize may be true.
Side note - our friend from across the pond is SO excited about visit to the UK might be on your horizon. You made his week!
Hope this finds you well Ben. Give your lovely wife my best!
I'm lucky that I work for myself, at home, and don't need to be working full time. I can make sure my deadlines factor in my illness and random days when I just cannot. I honestly don't think I could work a regular job now :(
I’m really lucky to have an accommodation plan at work, but I wish the world wasn’t this way! I haven’t had access to a formal accommodation plan that worked for my illness until I started in academia.
I can get back to loving my job again. I just look forward to having the support I need to be successful in the role without having to work round the clock.
Not sure about your music taste, but I've compiled these examples in no specific order especially to cheer you up - they constitute a sort of Top 15 from days of yore, when in my heydays I spent many nights in clubs along the Mediterranean Sea shore (ouch, I've been terribly melancholic lately) 😃
Conjure One + Sinéad O'Connor: th-cam.com/video/UuG4jBn0pv8/w-d-xo.html
New Order: th-cam.com/video/fGrb7abRVHw/w-d-xo.html
Deep Forest + Márta Sebestyén: th-cam.com/video/zQEV-XemfcE/w-d-xo.html
Gala: th-cam.com/video/p3l7fgvrEKM/w-d-xo.html
Gary Jules + Michael Andrews (originally Tears for Fears): th-cam.com/video/ZUtAe5PUKtE/w-d-xo.html
Robert Miles + Maria Nayler: th-cam.com/video/V-T59HhlqN0/w-d-xo.html
Alphaville: th-cam.com/video/W5guhMw_EH0/w-d-xo.html
A-ha: th-cam.com/video/DCkbfyk6XGc/w-d-xo.html
The Cranberries: th-cam.com/video/RUmdWdEgHgk/w-d-xo.html
Cocteau Twins: th-cam.com/video/iq8TKMs6RLM/w-d-xo.html
Billy Idol: th-cam.com/video/9OFpfTd0EIs/w-d-xo.html
Pet Shop Boys: th-cam.com/video/DnvFOaBoieE/w-d-xo.html
Moloko: th-cam.com/video/w1eN8vyVFIM/w-d-xo.html
ATB (originally Olive): th-cam.com/video/ou28lmZDR-A/w-d-xo.html
Duran Duran: th-cam.com/video/Epj84QVw2rc/w-d-xo.html
+
Bazaar (improvisation by an old acquaintance of mine, the now regrettable dead genius Peter Bastian, prof. of theoretical physics, author and bassoonist): th-cam.com/video/EaZD-lYtOHc/w-d-xo.html
ENJOY! 🎶🎸🙏
Thank you for this! 💜💯
Good tunes there 😻
@@catpawrosales4265 Glad you like 'em, they're all from a happy time in my life. Here you go, a bonus to make it a Top 20 😃
Everything but the Girl: th-cam.com/video/tkO0A3c_3LI/w-d-xo.html
Erasure: th-cam.com/video/DRoo53diveo/w-d-xo.html
Sinéad O'Connor: th-cam.com/video/z_-vEoKvkhU/w-d-xo.html
Fiction Factory: th-cam.com/video/kC8BQlhv8yc/w-d-xo.html
September: th-cam.com/video/hdIV_3IOQlM/w-d-xo.html
@@catpawrosales4265… plus this one, because I do know that Barrett adores her, and here she truly shines!
Sinéad O’Connor (originally Elton John): th-cam.com/video/C_-SMHjX5os/w-d-xo.html
(I once danced with her btw., in a jazz night club in Copenhagen, before she became very famous.)
@@catpawrosales4265 Just checked the playlists on your channel 👍. Looks like we listen to many of the same bands and artists -- Blue Boy, U2, Moby, Snap, Sting, Alan Parsons, even Lisa Nilsson. And Gasolin! I personally knew Kim Larsen, we grew up and lived in the same area of Copenhagen. He never forgot his roots, kept hanging out in town like everyone else, always ready for a talk, a beer and playing a piece on the piano, but regrettably he died in 2018. Isn't this one wonderful: th-cam.com/video/BeVOkjOT4Lk/w-d-xo.html
Aw, babe, the pathos of watching you try to justify the failure to support and the bad circumstances, with the taglines about NOPE THIS IS NOT HOW IT SHOULD BE DONE, aghhh. Glad you're on the other side of the realization. COntinuing to watch for management comeuppance.
I know. I watched myself contort myself into pretzels trying to justify them dumping not and more on me.
I don’t even care about any comeuppance, I just want adequate staff support, so I can do my job effectively.
However, I can smell vacation and I think the time away will help me reevaluate.
Thanks for the support friend. Last week was brutal on a lot of fronts.
🚐🚐🚐@@BarrettLaurie