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I got pinch myself after watching that. Do you have any idea how a person who's been gaslighted feels ? Your insane with your videos 👺👺👺 Your a narcissist yourself anyone can see that. 👺👺👺
@@dianacardenas1518 honey listen this legal bird brain wants cash probably to bankroll a Kardashian like reality show and that's ok if she has the smarts to win a case. I read her win / loss ratio is 35%-35% the other 30% she was late to court doing make up or on the phone to Hollywood producer I think his name was Harvey Weinstein I believe !! 👺 (She's insane).
@@RebeccaZungEsq yes I got married cause I love him he got married cause he didn't have the best relationship with his mother.she is a Jehovah witness he did something that was unforgivable in her eyes when he was a teenager,so in order for him to get back in her food grace he had to join the kingdom hall church but we had already lived together for 7 years and after the marriage of several years he had an affair with the neighbors teenage daughter and was lying about so Once I found out he moved out when she graduated from highschool and got rid of our house without me knowing anything about it he filed bankruptcy but Both our name was on the house so I was left homeless and abandoned living in a house that was know longer mine out of him not getting caught having a relationship with a child
As a victim of narcissistic abuse I need to say... Don't do it! It's exhausting and it's not worthy. Nobody can live registering everything,documenting everything,recording everything...is unhealthy for yourself.Just run away as far as you can and apply contact zero. It's the best for your mental health
Many narcissists are relentless! You are deeply underestimating them. They will stalk you and seek to hurt you BECAUSE you “got away”. And this may be the best route for safety. A paper trail always helps! In ANY legal matters. And keeping a record was extremely VALIDATING for me! Narc behavior is so difficult to explain - so the proofs really laid it out. They are always messing with your reality… and a log will bring so much clarity! I say do what ever you have to do to be your own best friend. And if you don’t log the experience… it’s going to be too hard to get that proof later - I even forgot about some physical abuse my ex did to me! Your mental health is tired and in a state of confusion the best thing to do is write it down and validate what they are actually doing ti you
My narc tried to smear campaign me after I filed a protection order and had him evicted from my home. I felt unheard and unbelieved. Since then, I was grated a final protection order, an extension, he was arrested and found guilty on multiple charges of abuse and violations of two protection orders. My narcissist tried to ruin my reputation through lies and in the end, I exposed him by telling the truth. I feel vindicated and heard. I no longer care what HIS family and HIS friends think 😌 because the law and the facts are on my side.
Nice. My abuser. She's a girl So she just got a restraining order cause I tried to speak to her after she spread her smear campaign. Got everyone in on it while I never knew what was happening. And when I tried to talk to her. Everyone protected her and she got a restraining order to keep me away from her. It's evil as shit And then she got her bf. My friend to act like he's some good guy and he's helping her. You could see their text in the restraining order that felt so fake and forced and dry. So obvious it was a plan of theirs but no one sees it 😂 cause everyone thinks he's just trying to help her. So they ignore how pathetic and scripted it looks 😂 it's insane
They dated for 8 years and their messages just seemed so pathetic for 8 years. How ppl don't realize. Thinking narcs can change is fucking insane. Just with that fact if that's what their acting like. He just got better 😂😂😂 still looks so fake. No one gets better with narcissist behavior😂😂😂 god ppl are insane. This girl protecting this abuser while they fuck me over. So he can look good and they play the long game to look good to girls like he's changed so he can go abuse and rape women. And she enables his behavior cause she's been getting groomed by him to be his pet and do his dirty work. It's insane how ppl fall for this so easily
@@Ramzi-rn1ui I relate to your experience alot, especially with the fake evidence and flying monkey friends, family, boyfriend ect. It definitely is infuriating how manipulative a narc is, whether female or male and how so many people miss the OBVIOUS red flags. It's my hope that enablers eventually fall victim to the narcs they protect and that will cause them to reflect on the people they betrayed. I hope you break free of your narc and never look back because she will always have an eye on you and your best revenge is to forget she even existed and live your life. 💕
@@googleuser2480 good for you! Narcs always accuse. Thats how I found out what he was doing. He projects. He thinks everyone thinks like him. What he accused me of is all of which he had done or is doing. I’d would have never even thought of the things he has accused me of. And stating all these weird people who agree with or told him of these facts. He’s willing to believe strangers but not his partner. (If what he says is true)Staggering…
Great advice for people who have the wherewithal to keep "meticulous" documentation. Not so much when your mental health and sense of self has been shattered by the narcissists in your life. Exorbitant lawyers fees and retainers don't help much either. This world is broken.
@@frannybkranny8760 I am so exhausted.. I just found this channel.. as I repeatedly look up the stairs to make sure he isn’t coming while I say this. I am soo tired. Almost to the point that I am not sure anymore if it IS me… because that’s what he says.. or him. I tell him that it is us.. i don’t how many more ways that I can try to “change me” so that he at least kinda likes me again, if he doesn’t love me. Maybe I can make him like me a little bit, and we can just live in a fairly peaceful coexistence together. And I can keep this marriage together for another 4 years. If not for us, for our son. I am so sad and broken. But I am so worried about what this is going to turn my baby boy into as a man. I do not know what to do. I just want to want to live again… but most days I just wish I could die. It is so terrible. 😕
I did all the things you said in this video. Former judge Nancy Berger made our divorce last for 5 years in Tarrant County, Texas! I went through 3 attorneys and my ex went through 3 attorneys, too. I wrote a blog about that judge and many, many people trapped in her court were forced to remain sending the children to abusive parents, even when there was proven sexual assaults that never stopped. Our daughter is 21, now, but is not allowed to press charges against retired judge Nancy Berger in Tarrant County, Texas.
I dont want to die from my ex. Im shutting down. Protective orders and all and yet without an experienced attorney or the ability to speak up due to tortures, neglect and starvation, its useless. My life means something. My children and I have not survived for nothing. Prayers and Justice are needed. It's all dependent on me being able to not vomit or shut down.
My prayers are with you and your children. Been exactly where you are. My best advice is surround yourself with support, go to therapy, do everything the court instructs because they are looking for the most cooperative party so they can move along. The narcissist true colors are exposed because they can't follow rules. There is light on the other side. I promise. Hold on dear one. ❤
@@Vihabpointe praying for you! God can move the heart of a judge, comfort & strengthen the abused, & assure Ultimate Justice for all. Jesus won't leave or forsake you!
You CAN DO THIS!! I don't know what it's like to suffer this but think of what's at steak. If you're not around, you're kids are stuck with her. I KNOW FOR A FACT we all have this strength inside us. Maybe some counseling would be a good start for you to claim your power back. Then start proceedings. DOCUMENT everything you can remember now bc it counts. Even if you don't document on day it happened, if it's written down it becomes a LEGAL DOCUMENT!
Oh wow, so sorry for that. May your hopes and strength come from the Lord Jesus! May freedoms for you and your children come swiftly and may nothing wicked weigh you down. Yes, all of your lives matter!
@@recoveringsoul755 I saw a documentary that showed that the judges, the defense lawyers, and the prosecutors are all in a scam together. This undercover agent worked in all three capacities and he disclosed that bribery and corruption took place between all of them.
I'm so so so glad I documented EVERYTHING! I hope it's useful for my final hearing in Oct. I have pics, videos, audios, documents, witnesses, and I've provided the lot, snd it's all in order he's still got no "evidence" against me. I've waited over 2 years to have have my day, and getting to cross examine him is absolutely delicious.
Not to be rude, but you sound a tad narcissistic, or you are reacting and giving into one under terrible advice and have a really bad lawyer, good luck paying all those attorney fees. Sounds like you’re about to walk the plank. The judges goal will be to make sure there is no winner, so what may be delicious, will get sour real quick. Sorry you have been clearly misguided by your over zealous counsel. Such an injustice, wouldn’t be surprised both attorneys go share a drink together after the case. They are all friends you know? The legal world is a wild breed of people. So sorry, would be great if I’m wrong, but here in our town, if mediation is an impasse, it’s game over for both parties. A good lawyer is hard to find, because people think it’s a game of winning and loosing the minute a good lawyer gets honest they bolt to the next that will say “I’ll fight for you” … worst thing to come out of a family law attorneys mouth. There is no winner ever in family law.
Wow good for you!!!! How were you able to submit evidence of anything that happened, especially if the last incident is the only one that matters??!!! I couldn’t … good luck to you!
I wish I found you sooner. My lawyers were horrible. They never did any discovery. I had to deploy with the Army and while I was gone she went to court and got devastating financial rulings. I recently learned about NPD and narcissistic abuse. When I watched a presentation that described the relationship with a narcissistic. My jaw dropped because it was my experience the presenter was describing.
I am so sorry. It shouldn’t be allowed for either partner to take the other back to court on a regular basis. I think there is a campaign to stop this as it is often just abuse. Also, there is a campaign to get rid of the Alienation accusation as it is impossible to prove and is the classic response from an abuser when their victim has had enough. Best wishes to you both. It must be exhausting.
@StStStS thank you ! Seriously so exhausting and stressful . And he wants to try to use that i have ptsd caused by him to try and say I shouldn't have custody. . They are so evil . He would break my child if he did that .
@@sommermilhous3594 ❤️ Everyone says the family court system is not fit for purpose. To stress a Mother and waste her resources IS abusing the children indirectly. They are not separate things. ❤️
I divorced my abuser in 2012, but because my lawyer wasnt very good, the judge went the neutral route. 50/50 custody and decision-making. Its been torture coparenting with my abuser!
Fortunately, your youngest child will turn 18 eventually. Parent your children remembering that your children will be adults with memories of childhood one day. How do you want them to remember of your parenting? I should have listened to my father when he advised me to not get worked up and sucked in to the shenanigans of my ex
Also email IS documentation. I didn't even know he was a narc but bc I refused to see him in person and only communicated through email and text and the time I had So Much info to bury him if we went to court
Amazing share. Thank you. I did all this in my divorce and took a potentially $300k 3 year divorce into 30k and 9 months approx. We share a child and contract is in play but all the techniques learned from you and others keeps me so sane.
I am beyond grateful that I found this!!!!! It’s exactly what I’m in right now.Being the bigger person all these years,is coming to an end. I’m approaching it confidently,with a lot of faith for patience and grace!
You are awesome. I just dont know what to do anymore. My life has been trash for so long. They ruined my life. You always hear people say "women are crazy." They truly have no idea.
Yes. I kept detailed journal for particularly for the last five of the marriage. I buried it behind stuff in a deep drawer. You tore the house apart while I was at work. He ripped all of them out and destroyed them so I have nothing and now he has left me with nothing. I’m 76. This has ruined my life.
Stumper..... My ex is a covert and the judge in our custody case is a malignant or psychopath. I was abused for ten years, had all the evidence, but the judge ruled against me at every turn. The judge let my ex take our son to a different state and I have not had contact with him since February 2022. I can't express the sorrow, rage and powerlessness I feel. The world is unfathomably sick and cruel.
@@BradRaiche I faced much of that too. Judges and lawyers and law enforcement as well are biased as anyone else and don't want to admit it. In the end I felt anger toward the system that permitted and encouraged abuse to go on to children and spouses in a divorce case.
It’s really pathetic when you’re on the other side. When you realize he’s the insecure one. He’s the child. But then you’ll realize you don’t have a real marriage. It’s just a matter of time either he leaves or you do.
And the children suffer the most. I hate that having to fight for survival hurts my kids. Court and legal process has no business in family life in the way it has evolved over time. It’s all so traumatic and sad.
I filed a restraining order against my on/off ex gf of 4yrs. She claimed she was pregnant, so i called DCF since she said in text "Ima gonna make you pay, and youll never see it." 2 days before our hearing, she filed false allegations against me, then didn't show for court. This lady feels I owe her yet we haven't lived together since 2021 when she kicked me out the apartment that she lost 3 months later due to non-payment. She was homeless for 1.5yrs and finally got section 8. I in that same time, started a new career, gotten a new vehicle and started an LLC. She's determined to destroy me.
🙏🏼Thank you for being out there and standing up for/with us.! My ex withheld spousal maintenance to pay for child support that I shouldn’t owe (screwed me in court; financial abuse) he makes six figures, I live in my car now. One year left before the chance to vacate orders based on improper service disappears.
Thank You Sir!!! We had police visit the household. I kept my hands visible at all times and no abrupt movements. Never reach for nothing...like wallets or anything without asking first and fully identifying what you are getting. 🙏
Thanks for this video. In this day and age of people calling each other narcissists, the need to actually define who is the narc or target is very important.
Exactly! My wife got caught stealing hence WHY I FILED! And she kidnapped my child and would not allow me any contact! I have said this 50000000 times, my lawyers will not say it!!!!!!
I have been told by multiple attorneys that in Pennsylvania the law is totally different, all the abuse that I went through physically sexually emotionally does not stand up in court.
This is true. Pa laws don’t cover this type of abuse. It won’t be part of any legal process. Family court system doesn’t care. Everyone within the family law system is lining each other’s pockets.
@@AmyLynnValone-wz2tt wow that sucks. I live in Pennsylvania and I am trying to help a friend who suffered from narcissistic abuse. They were together for 5 years but weren't married. He loaned her $12,000 to open a business and he wants her to pay him back
That's very sad to hear. I just had a female attorney tell me in Virginia he has right to give him protection via a PPO so he can keep me silent after many years of silent treatment. I did not let that attorney affect me negatively I decided she was a b**** unconcerned about women's issues and I am continuing to look for another lawyer. I need to look into if it is the same in Ohio as it is in Pennsylvania
Happiest new year dear! Happy to see this pop up on one’s feed. Appreciate everything you’ve worked towards that lead up to this moment. You rock! ⭐️🌞💛
Thank you for your video and sharing your expertise. My ex husband is still taking me back forth to court. Recently im in court now bc he moved 1.5 hrs away n he wants me to pay toll feed n drive farther away to pick up drop off during parental time. He lied in court n said i withheld kids but i didn't. When i responded to this lie judge stopped me n said that I was fighting with him. I wasn't. Its beyond exhausting. He now lives in rural area n opened his door n told girls to get out his house. His fiance stopped him but he manipulated the investigator n case was unfounded which means in his sick mind kids lied
I never thought to try to prove narcissistic abuse, in my probate case. But, other than that, it’s good that the only communication there’s been, between me and this sibling, is via email and in hearings and case management conferences, where just the court, itself, has records of how this person is a pathological liar. Still, I am pro se and am trying to close this case. Unfortunately, a small issue has prevented closure. One thing I did, which I’m unsure if it was impactful, was to threaten that I would file a number of individual motions against the defendant, in more than direct proportion, to the previous motion they filed and were denied. Obviously, I know that the judge wants to close the case so, they don’t want to hear that. But, again, I know they have to go by law and I don’t know how impactful that would be. A very small thing has been a help and That is that I keep all records related to this case, in zippered neoprene laptop cases. It’s just a good way to ensure I don’t lose the smallest receipt, even when I have to take paperwork to court, when it’s not a phone hearing.
Thank you for giving me your perspective, and emphasizing what to do to make sure that the process is as effective as possible. I definitely like the idea of being in the driving seat as you described, and your advice reinforces my confidence that I can do it. I will achieve my objectives by taking your perspectives into account, so that the outcome is one that you would celebrate.
something to do would be to have a Daily Journal to keep track of spending but at the same time of daily events and you don't have to write a journal down all you have to do is talk into your phone for the most part and save every day to a draft email that way you can type in search and find whatever topic you want as long as the header of each draft email is labeled the date that you're writing the journal about
The one thing you have to your advantage is that behaviour that the person does to irritate you or inflame you does not necessarily equate well with the court but you have to point that out for example if they continually lie that that's fine but if they lie in the courtroom then they are mud to the judge so you've got to take advantage of their capacity to lie and catch them out
yes! Omg!!!! I absolutly love your... teaching style I guess ... your a brilliant woman ! thank you so very much for your content !!!!! Many blessingings cuzzin!!
This is progress to be able to expose them in divorce. We need a way to hold them accountable when it has been a malignant dangerous one who hurt us in a relationship. I feel like we should be able to press charges for this abuse just as any other type of abuse.
That’s pretty easy. The therapist needs to ask 1: How do you feel about your Dad. 2: What makes you feel that way. 3: How do you know that Dad did/does/feels that?
And ask the child why they believe something. Is it something someone told them? Or something they actually remember happening with their own memory? Get them to question what is true, where did this idea come from. Separate facts from opinions. I had to do this myself because I had thoughts that were not my own rattling around in my head. Maybe from the ex, maybe an overly critical teacher, who knows. IS IT TRUE? It's a great question to ask yourself and have asked if your kids, even if they're adults now.
Ive been in a 9 1/2 divorce. 7 attorneys later and I have had my findings struck, been silenced, no home, no possessions to include inheritance, etc. Nothing was presented on my behalf, ir FL statutes. I had all of my proof against him. I left with the clothes on by for my life from an abusive triad. Absolutely deplorable..
Me too! Two trash bags and a restraining order and relocation. Then my GAL ordered me to live within 2 miles and then they ordered no visitation. Now I’m stuck here. 181 motions into my divorce two martial settlement arguments and still said no again. It’s crazy- he still has 23 semi automatics after the police went to get them still he has them. He still has all of my son and my belongings. Still nothing. No child support nothing- it’s frustrating but we got this! 12 Crates of proof and still nothing in FL courts.
This is so good. My husband scared me so much. He would punch doors etc. I fled with our 1st child to my parents. I went back with him as he apologized for all the drama. We have a second child now and he owns a bar and we don't see much of him except on Sundays. It's ok because I am at peace being with the kids and taking care of the house.
You were crazy not to flee with the first child! Now he's going to make you pay for leaving! It will not get better because he knows YOU'RE SCARED! IT WILL GET WORSE! I had an abusive ex husband! Guess how many kids he got from me!!!!
@@GwendolynPorter-w6c That is a very unkind response. Stay in your own lane. Everyone does the best with what they have and what they know. We are all here to learn and do not want to experience judgement for our choices while under duress.
@@AlishaPurkis I understand because ta similar thing happened to me. I didn’t understand the abuse cycle and that the poor excuse for an apology didn’t hold. 20 years later an another child I saw there was no choice. Jekyll and Hyde came together. Safety was obviously a big problem and my children were in danger too. Fortunately with help from close relatives I was able to get away, and fortunately a shelter was available to me and my children. It took several weeks for me to get a hold on my thoughts which were clouded in fear. I kept a journal in the shelter to help me keep things straight. That involved writing all feelings and thoughts about current situation at the time. I felt very confused but knew I was much better off having left. Years later there are still issues as having some flashbacks that cause me to feel confused again, feeling abandoned by lawyers and courts who said I was doing well in the case though it didn't seem like it to me, the other side being more expensive, meaner, and dishonest to their advantage! In the end, I think it was and is my life and I value every minute of it hard as it was at times. As the saying goes, life isn't a bowl of cherries. It has its pits too.
My lawyer turned out to be a narcassistic and I got screwed by them using me as a pawn in their own legal game. Wallmans lawyers in Adelaide Australia were highly abusive towards me. They lied to the judge and for away with abusing me for eight years. I'm a survivor of two npd parents and then got in a relationship where my boyfriend tried to kill me and he got away with it. I won my case but I never had hardly any of my costs cover. I was left out of pocket and suicidal from legal abuse. Two years later I'm just starting to recover now.
Commenting at the yes part 6:38 I’ve been fighting my son’s father in court for the second time now. It took me this second time being in court to understand this. The first time we went to court I was alone, (he abandoned us, threatened us, you name it.) I was feeling low and when he served me papers for full custody I panicked. I tried to talk about the abuse, (no police reports) and the emotional distress and bullying does not matter to the courts. It’s infuriating that someone like this can just get away with being the worst with no consequences. He got half of my son’s time in court because they’re going to award a father with time. (Even tho I never took it from him he was always welcome to see his son but never showed up) This time, I have learned that facts matter. I’ve been documenting and planning for him to file another case against me for full custody. I’m not even fighting him, I’m fighting the court. I’m answering the question they want to know, and he can say and do whatever he wants. He can throw all the fits he wants to his lawyers, his delusions of grandeur isn’t enough to take my baby away all because he wants to hurt me. I know his REAL motives, and I have to play the game he throws at me and prove it’s a waste of time. He does nothing that shows the court he should get more parental power than what he has now, he should be in his life and he’s been doing fine. He just needs to not use our son as a pawn to hurt me for whatever delusion reason he wants to hurt me for.
The epitome😊 of a lawyer or judge Exploitation of others to achieve personal gain. An unwillingness to empathize with others' feelings, wishes, or needs. Intense jealousy of others and the believe that others are equally jealous of them.
Fortunately I’ve always knew who I am. Unfortunately I’m pretty easy going and don’t ask for much. I’m independent and don’t need to ask for things. He didn’t know I would stand up for myself. At first I was bowled over. I knew of his traumatic past and showed compassion. But they can’t keep up the love bombing long. Took a few years but his true colors came to light. He slowly started the bullying, accusations, rages(no physical, I think he knew I’d put him away) I told him he could leave me, I began not to engage, I told him if he doesn’t change he’s pushing me out the door. My conditions are we sell everything but our personal vehicles, split it and go our merry ways. So far he’s still here, and trying hard to be normal and not attack. It’s calm but I’m indifferent now. Narcs compulsion is so strong to control, suspect, be the victim. It must be exhausting in their brain.
I tried to stick it out and fight for change in the organisation, but then I decided if no-one else was going to fight for change then they must like it. Now I've worked hard to leave them behind so I can live in peace before required to rest in it.
If all a narcissist in some capacity, judges plates are full .. make it easy … it’s all about the $$ … ugh - the root to Evil… in the interim being abused and striving worth each day😢 where’s the human kindness … we lost it! So sad and pathetic
@@dianacardenas1518 I agree, the only way to get free is to leave without nothing and starting over again because you will never be done with them because it’s about money and control
My abuse has turned my brain to mush. I have documentation I've been saving, but now that it's time to print them out for court, I don't know how to print emails, voicemails, and photos! I have no support system to walk me through these things, so now what? I have a printer, but I can't even set it up to work. And going somewhere? I'm agoraphobic and visually impaired, so driving is a huge hurdle anymore.
It is a horrible position to be in. The world today seems only interested in the almighty dollar. I sought help with legal aid for seniors etc etc etc. And not supposed for free entity was free. No space. No time. No requirements. I am myself caught in a 3 year nightmare that I am hoping ends soon. I would be more than willing to help where I can if we are close. I live in Savannah for now. But going back to the Midwest soon. You can certainly reach out if you would like.
Well, one common thing they start doing is called love-bombing, where they make you think that you're the most perfect person they've ever met and they are utterly delighted to get to know you. If we had never heard that term or never heard of narcissism, we'd just think they were infatuated, enthralled, captivated, aka falling in love with us, and making us feel very special. A Covert narcissist can change their behavior at whatever point in time they choose. You can get totally blindsided One Day by something crazy that makes no sense. If you don't understand narcissism, it's super easy to make the situation worse by simply asking them a question. Now they give you the silent treatment. It's all very cold and calculated. Most likely, You're a kind, normal person who had no idea what was going on. I was a senior widow for 10 years, so I was apparently Ripe for the Pickins, as they say.
I survived and now dreading life in my adulthood (Mommy-dearest 👿) is alive in my younger brother, but she was mean all her life. Dad, Michael Martin, married a witch, Brenda Ann Phillips(AKA) Martin Jewell Phillips was her dad
@Rebecca Zung, documenting doesn’t do squat when he has the military training to lock you out of your computer remotely. It doesn’t do any good when he lies to get a restraining order by telling the courts that you said you were going to off your own children (three boys 15, 12, 2 and one girl 5). It was granted immediately 2 year no contact. He wanted me out of the home just so he could get his 18 year old plaything in. And that is barely scratching the surface.
I was a stay at home mom with no income for 25 years & he filed & I was hoping he would have to pay my lawyer fees especially since he’s dragging it out now for 18 months
Yes, I just found you about 2 weeks ago and have watched a few of your videos. I really wish I had found you a year ago. 40yrs. Of marriage 2 adult children 3 1/3 years of her 3 different attorneys now 2 weeks away from my deposition and court on 10/22 like i feel like no one on base 4 runs behind 9th inning and i am now up at bat. I didn’t understand or have a concept of just how encompassing her narcissism and gas lighting was. I don’t remember which of your videos I was watching when I had to take a seat because of the shock and fear of finally realizing my situation .
I clicked on this because my ex always tells everybody I'm a narcissist. She got a protective order against me and told the judge that she thinks I was undiagnosed narcissist in court. She doesn't even know what the traits are probably. I'm convinced it was projection in that she's a narcissist, but I have the humidity to assume that there's a high likelihood that I am incorrect.
Want to know more about how to prove narcissistic abuse in court? Join me on my free live masterclass on how to Outsmart the Narcissist! Sign up right here>>> slay.rebeccazung.com/freetrainingrz-3627
Looking forward to supporting you there!
@@RebeccaZungEsq After the master class it costs … we don’t have any $$ too begin with … so how do we get the $$ to start… if we don’t have it!?!!!!
I got pinch myself after watching that. Do you have any idea how a person who's been gaslighted feels ? Your insane with your videos 👺👺👺 Your a narcissist yourself anyone can see that. 👺👺👺
@@dianacardenas1518 honey listen this legal bird brain wants cash probably to bankroll a Kardashian like reality show and that's ok if she has the smarts to win a case. I read her win / loss ratio is 35%-35% the other 30% she was late to court doing make up or on the phone to Hollywood producer I think his name was Harvey Weinstein I believe !! 👺 (She's insane).
@@RebeccaZungEsq yes I got married cause I love him he got married cause he didn't have the best relationship with his mother.she is a Jehovah witness he did something that was unforgivable in her eyes when he was a teenager,so in order for him to get back in her food grace he had to join the kingdom hall church but we had already lived together for 7 years and after the marriage of several years he had an affair with the neighbors teenage daughter and was lying about so Once I found out he moved out when she graduated from highschool and got rid of our house without me knowing anything about it he filed bankruptcy but Both our name was on the house so I was left homeless and abandoned living in a house that was know longer mine out of him not getting caught having a relationship with a child
The rest of my years will be the BEST of my years!
@@tional5266 I love that
As a victim of narcissistic abuse I need to say... Don't do it! It's exhausting and it's not worthy. Nobody can live registering everything,documenting everything,recording everything...is unhealthy for yourself.Just run away as far as you can and apply contact zero. It's the best for your mental health
@@lilithmed86555 Not applicable if children are involved.
@debbiecreter2005 Sure. That is even more complicated
@@lilithmed86555 How narcissistic of you. These are her grandchildren, she she do everything she can to rescue them.
Impossible with kids
Many narcissists are relentless! You are deeply underestimating them. They will stalk you and seek to hurt you BECAUSE you “got away”. And this may be the best route for safety. A paper trail always helps! In ANY legal matters.
And keeping a record was extremely VALIDATING for me! Narc behavior is so difficult to explain - so the proofs really laid it out.
They are always messing with your reality… and a log will bring so much clarity!
I say do what ever you have to do to be your own best friend.
And if you don’t log the experience… it’s going to be too hard to get that proof later - I even forgot about some physical abuse my ex did to me! Your mental health is tired and in a state of confusion the best thing to do is write it down and validate what they are actually doing ti you
My narc tried to smear campaign me after I filed a protection order and had him evicted from my home. I felt unheard and unbelieved. Since then, I was grated a final protection order, an extension, he was arrested and found guilty on multiple charges of abuse and violations of two protection orders. My narcissist tried to ruin my reputation through lies and in the end, I exposed him by telling the truth. I feel vindicated and heard. I no longer care what HIS family and HIS friends think 😌 because the law and the facts are on my side.
@@googleuser2480 Right on.
The TRUTH is ever so powerful!
Nice. My abuser. She's a girl
So she just got a restraining order cause I tried to speak to her after she spread her smear campaign. Got everyone in on it while I never knew what was happening. And when I tried to talk to her. Everyone protected her and she got a restraining order to keep me away from her. It's evil as shit
And then she got her bf. My friend to act like he's some good guy and he's helping her. You could see their text in the restraining order that felt so fake and forced and dry. So obvious it was a plan of theirs but no one sees it 😂 cause everyone thinks he's just trying to help her. So they ignore how pathetic and scripted it looks 😂 it's insane
They dated for 8 years and their messages just seemed so pathetic for 8 years. How ppl don't realize. Thinking narcs can change is fucking insane. Just with that fact if that's what their acting like. He just got better 😂😂😂 still looks so fake. No one gets better with narcissist behavior😂😂😂 god ppl are insane. This girl protecting this abuser while they fuck me over. So he can look good and they play the long game to look good to girls like he's changed so he can go abuse and rape women. And she enables his behavior cause she's been getting groomed by him to be his pet and do his dirty work. It's insane how ppl fall for this so easily
@@Ramzi-rn1ui I relate to your experience alot, especially with the fake evidence and flying monkey friends, family, boyfriend ect. It definitely is infuriating how manipulative a narc is, whether female or male and how so many people miss the OBVIOUS red flags. It's my hope that enablers eventually fall victim to the narcs they protect and that will cause them to reflect on the people they betrayed. I hope you break free of your narc and never look back because she will always have an eye on you and your best revenge is to forget she even existed and live your life. 💕
@@googleuser2480 good for you! Narcs always accuse. Thats how I found out what he was doing. He projects. He thinks everyone thinks like him. What he accused me of is all of which he had done or is doing. I’d would have never even thought of the things he has accused me of. And stating all these weird people who agree with or told him of these facts. He’s willing to believe strangers but not his partner. (If what he says is true)Staggering…
Great advice for people who have the wherewithal to keep "meticulous" documentation. Not so much when your mental health and sense of self has been shattered by the narcissists in your life. Exorbitant lawyers fees and retainers don't help much either. This world is broken.
It sure is!!!!!
@@frannybkranny8760 I am so exhausted.. I just found this channel.. as I repeatedly look up the stairs to make sure he isn’t coming while I say this. I am soo tired. Almost to the point that I am not sure anymore if it IS me… because that’s what he says.. or him. I tell him that it is us.. i don’t how many more ways that I can try to “change me” so that he at least kinda likes me again, if he doesn’t love me. Maybe I can make him like me a little bit, and we can just live in a fairly peaceful coexistence together. And I can keep this marriage together for another 4 years. If not for us, for our son. I am so sad and broken. But I am so worried about what this is going to turn my baby boy into as a man. I do not know what to do. I just want to want to live again… but most days I just wish I could die.
It is so terrible. 😕
Amen.
Thank you. Exactly. Me
I’m going to go ahead and Fifth this!
I did all the things you said in this video. Former judge Nancy Berger made our divorce last for 5 years in Tarrant County, Texas! I went through 3 attorneys and my ex went through 3 attorneys, too. I wrote a blog about that judge and many, many people trapped in her court were forced to remain sending the children to abusive parents, even when there was proven sexual assaults that never stopped. Our daughter is 21, now, but is not allowed to press charges against retired judge Nancy Berger in Tarrant County, Texas.
The system is BY narcissists FOR narcissists
This is why people don't leave narcissists.
They obviously have too much power.
Obscene
Laws need to be changed!!!!!
I dont want to die from my ex. Im shutting down. Protective orders and all and yet without an experienced attorney or the ability to speak up due to tortures, neglect and starvation, its useless. My life means something. My children and I have not survived for nothing. Prayers and Justice are needed. It's all dependent on me being able to not vomit or shut down.
My prayers are with you and your children. Been exactly where you are. My best advice is surround yourself with support, go to therapy, do everything the court instructs because they are looking for the most cooperative party so they can move along. The narcissist true colors are exposed because they can't follow rules. There is light on the other side. I promise. Hold on dear one. ❤
@@Vihabpointe praying for you! God can move the heart of a judge, comfort & strengthen the abused, & assure Ultimate Justice for all. Jesus won't leave or forsake you!
You CAN DO THIS!! I don't know what it's like to suffer this but think of what's at steak. If you're not around, you're kids are stuck with her.
I KNOW FOR A FACT we all have this strength inside us. Maybe some counseling would be a good start for you to claim your power back. Then start proceedings.
DOCUMENT everything you can remember now bc it counts. Even if you don't document on day it happened, if it's written down it becomes a LEGAL DOCUMENT!
Hire private security if you feel that threatened or keep others constantly around to protect
Oh wow, so sorry for that. May your hopes and strength come from the Lord Jesus! May freedoms for you and your children come swiftly and may nothing wicked weigh you down. Yes, all of your lives matter!
I needed this 3 years ago. Every time I showed up to court, it was a different story, a different telling of events with different dates.
The lawyers are the only ones that win when people fight 🙄
Yes, it's been this way since time immemorial. If there's one novel that vividly illustrates this, it is Dickens' "Bleak House".
They always win.. And ONLY them.
I totally agree.
That was a very expensive lesson; the judge (female) chastised my attorney for taking my money for what she knew was a losing battle.
The key is to find a lawyer who cares more about their client than kowtowing to the judge's quota and time line (aka their career).
But a lottery ticket. Better odds.
Kowtowing. Not cow towing. No cows needed
Lawyers work for the court, not you.
@@recoveringsoul755 My point exactly.
@@recoveringsoul755 I saw a documentary that showed that the judges, the defense lawyers, and the prosecutors are all in a scam together. This undercover agent worked in all three capacities and he disclosed that bribery and corruption took place between all of them.
I'm so so so glad I documented EVERYTHING! I hope it's useful for my final hearing in Oct. I have pics, videos, audios, documents, witnesses, and I've provided the lot, snd it's all in order he's still got no "evidence" against me. I've waited over 2 years to have have my day, and getting to cross examine him is absolutely delicious.
Not to be rude, but you sound a tad narcissistic, or you are reacting and giving into one under terrible advice and have a really bad lawyer, good luck paying all those attorney fees. Sounds like you’re about to walk the plank. The judges goal will be to make sure there is no winner, so what may be delicious, will get sour real quick. Sorry you have been clearly misguided by your over zealous counsel. Such an injustice, wouldn’t be surprised both attorneys go share a drink together after the case. They are all friends you know? The legal world is a wild breed of people. So sorry, would be great if I’m wrong, but here in our town, if mediation is an impasse, it’s game over for both parties. A good lawyer is hard to find, because people think it’s a game of winning and loosing the minute a good lawyer gets honest they bolt to the next that will say “I’ll fight for you” … worst thing to come out of a family law attorneys mouth. There is no winner ever in family law.
Good for you! I've been telling my sister she needs to document everything. This is great reinforcement for that point. Thank you for sharing.
Will the judge actually look at your evidence?
Wow good for you!!!! How were you able to submit evidence of anything that happened, especially if the last incident is the only one that matters??!!! I couldn’t … good luck to you!
Hello, may I know how how did you capture videos without the narc knowing that you're videoing??
I wish I found you sooner. My lawyers were horrible. They never did any discovery. I had to deploy with the Army and while I was gone she went to court and got devastating financial rulings. I recently learned about NPD and narcissistic abuse. When I watched a presentation that described the relationship with a narcissistic. My jaw dropped because it was my experience the presenter was describing.
So the law changed to work against regular people , not going to make it through this video
Yes. Dealing w malignant narc w kids involved. Divorced 9 yrs ago and still in court every other yr for custody battles.
@serapf.9768 same but I only have 1 child. We've been doing this for 11 years
I am so sorry. It shouldn’t be allowed for either partner to take the other back to court on a regular basis. I think there is a campaign to stop this as it is often just abuse. Also, there is a campaign to get rid of the Alienation accusation as it is impossible to prove and is the classic response from an abuser when their victim has had enough. Best wishes to you both. It must be exhausting.
@StStStS thank you ! Seriously so exhausting and stressful . And he wants to try to use that i have ptsd caused by him to try and say I shouldn't have custody. . They are so evil . He would break my child if he did that .
@@sommermilhous3594 ❤️ Everyone says the family court system is not fit for purpose. To stress a Mother and waste her resources IS abusing the children indirectly. They are not separate things. ❤️
Absolutely, it's been a joke they always start him off with a clean slate don't look at his record at all .
I divorced my abuser in 2012, but because my lawyer wasnt very good, the judge went the neutral route. 50/50 custody and decision-making. Its been torture coparenting with my abuser!
I'm in the same situation but I NEVER see him and I rarely communicate. If so, it's via email. It can be done
Fortunately, your youngest child will turn 18 eventually.
Parent your children remembering that your children will be adults with memories of childhood one day. How do you want them to remember of your parenting?
I should have listened to my father when he advised me to not get worked up and sucked in to the shenanigans of my ex
Also email IS documentation. I didn't even know he was a narc but bc I refused to see him in person and only communicated through email and text and the time I had So Much info to bury him if we went to court
I also had that. The legal profession do not understand it. Fortunately my ex husband died. Putting pieces together has not been easy.
@wellinever1558 🫂
Amazing share. Thank you. I did all this in my divorce and took a potentially $300k 3 year divorce into 30k and 9 months approx. We share a child and contract is in play but all the techniques learned from you and others keeps me so sane.
I thought this was about narcissistic abuse by judges and lawyers. Now that would be helpful to most people.
I am beyond grateful that I found this!!!!! It’s exactly what I’m in right now.Being the bigger person all these years,is coming to an end. I’m approaching it confidently,with a lot of faith for patience and grace!
You are awesome. I just dont know what to do anymore. My life has been trash for so long. They ruined my life. You always hear people say "women are crazy." They truly have no idea.
It's not you brother. It's an epidemic of late stage feminist psychosis.
Same never knew what was going on. Never he are system messed up
Yes. I kept detailed journal for particularly for the last five of the marriage. I buried it behind stuff in a deep drawer. You tore the house apart while I was at work. He ripped all of them out and destroyed them so I have nothing and now he has left me with nothing. I’m 76. This has ruined my life.
He tore the house apart…. Not you!
God sees all and bring everything needed to your memory. Your life is NOT ruined. You will be victorious.
Amen, God first, we’re alive, keep going
@@nancyterkeurst518 😱
@@audrelyngrace1695 If God was the answer, why did he let it happen or continue in the first place?
Stumper..... My ex is a covert and the judge in our custody case is a malignant or psychopath.
I was abused for ten years, had all the evidence, but the judge ruled against me at every turn. The judge let my ex take our son to a different state and I have not had contact with him since February 2022.
I can't express the sorrow, rage and powerlessness I feel.
The world is unfathomably sick and cruel.
@@BradRaiche were approaching the end of the last days my bro this was all written, only prayer to the creator can help us
Pray for strength, comfort, healing, guidance, forgiveness for your wrongs and flto be reunited with your son. I wish you all the best bro
Pray to Maa Kali ❤
I’m so sorry you’re facing this. Hang on. The truth will out.
@@BradRaiche I faced much of that too. Judges and lawyers and law enforcement as well are biased as anyone else and don't want to admit it. In the end I felt anger toward the system that permitted and encouraged abuse to go on to children and spouses in a divorce case.
RUN, RUN, RUN, seriously, it is not worth the garbage that they put you through. And they will.
It’s really pathetic when you’re on the other side. When you realize he’s the insecure one. He’s the child. But then you’ll realize you don’t have a real marriage. It’s just a matter of time either he leaves or you do.
Document everything.
I could have used this 35 years ago. Your whole channel is helpful.
I’m so glad you have found it helpful! ❤
And the children suffer the most. I hate that having to fight for survival hurts my kids. Court and legal process has no business in family life in the way it has evolved over time. It’s all so traumatic and sad.
I filed a restraining order against my on/off ex gf of 4yrs. She claimed she was pregnant, so i called DCF since she said in text "Ima gonna make you pay, and youll never see it." 2 days before our hearing, she filed false allegations against me, then didn't show for court. This lady feels I owe her yet we haven't lived together since 2021 when she kicked me out the apartment that she lost 3 months later due to non-payment. She was homeless for 1.5yrs and finally got section 8. I in that same time, started a new career, gotten a new vehicle and started an LLC. She's determined to destroy me.
YES! But still next to impossible!
Agree.
I'm pleased that a Circuit Judge will be taking my case, this gives me hope.
🙏🏼Thank you for being out there and standing up for/with us.!
My ex withheld spousal maintenance to pay for child support that I shouldn’t owe (screwed me in court; financial abuse) he makes six figures, I live in my car now.
One year left before the chance to vacate orders based on improper service disappears.
Thanks!
Thank You Sir!!! We had police visit the household. I kept my hands visible at all times and no abrupt movements. Never reach for nothing...like wallets or anything without asking first and fully identifying what you are getting. 🙏
HEY THANKS FOR DIGGIN THRU THE FELONY EMOTIONAL ABUSE CRIME AND LAW GAP
Amazing how you explained the situation of the Judge in court ...
Thanks for this video. In this day and age of people calling each other narcissists, the need to actually define who is the narc or target is very important.
Exactly! My wife got caught stealing hence WHY I FILED! And she kidnapped my child and would not allow me any contact! I have said this 50000000 times, my lawyers will not say it!!!!!!
Get a new attorney to represent you… if you feel the one you have is truly representing you
Exactly The same
Lawyers allegiance is to the Court. Not you.
@@MrProfessional777Nope their client, who is PAYING THEM. So funny
@@markjayw666
Delusional.
I have been told by multiple attorneys that in Pennsylvania the law is totally different, all the abuse that I went through physically sexually emotionally does not stand up in court.
This is true. Pa laws don’t cover this type of abuse. It won’t be part of any legal process. Family court system doesn’t care. Everyone within the family law system is lining each other’s pockets.
@@AmyLynnValone-wz2tt wow that sucks. I live in Pennsylvania and I am trying to help a friend who suffered from narcissistic abuse. They were together for 5 years but weren't married. He loaned her $12,000 to open a business and he wants her to pay him back
Same in Tennessee. It’s such a good ole boy country club - and, the women in the club are as bad as the men.
That's very sad to hear. I just had a female attorney tell me in Virginia he has right to give him protection via a PPO so he can keep me silent after many years of silent treatment. I did not let that attorney affect me negatively I decided she was a b**** unconcerned about women's issues and I am continuing to look for another lawyer. I need to look into if it is the same in Ohio as it is in Pennsylvania
For those who need just learn that in the state of Ohio they do recognize and address emotional psychological and sexual abuse
excellent. language of the court. where you build your connection between what you care about and what the judge will care about.
I liked, subscribed and shared. I have seen what these people are capable of. More people need to see videos like this.
Thanks! ❤
I've been so blessed. I have a magnificent attorney, coparent counselor and the judges aren't having any of it.
Happiest new year dear! Happy to see this pop up on one’s feed. Appreciate everything you’ve worked towards that lead up to this moment. You rock! ⭐️🌞💛
I learn something every time I listen to your videos
Thank you for your video and sharing your expertise. My ex husband is still taking me back forth to court. Recently im in court now bc he moved 1.5 hrs away n he wants me to pay toll feed n drive farther away to pick up drop off during parental time. He lied in court n said i withheld kids but i didn't. When i responded to this lie judge stopped me n said that I was fighting with him. I wasn't. Its beyond exhausting. He now lives in rural area n opened his door n told girls to get out his house. His fiance stopped him but he manipulated the investigator n case was unfounded which means in his sick mind kids lied
Lawyers are master minds
Amazing information, I am in the middle of this. Thanks for your advice
Thank you. My daughter is going through a nasty divorce from her violent narcissist husband. This will help a lot.
I never thought to try to prove narcissistic abuse, in my probate case. But, other than that, it’s good that the only communication there’s been, between me and this sibling, is via email and in hearings and case management conferences, where just the court, itself, has records of how this person is a pathological liar.
Still, I am pro se and am trying to close this case. Unfortunately, a small issue has prevented closure.
One thing I did, which I’m unsure if it was impactful, was to threaten that I would file a number of individual motions against the defendant, in more than direct proportion, to the previous motion they filed and were denied. Obviously, I know that the judge wants to close the case so, they don’t want to hear that. But, again, I know they have to go by law and I don’t know how impactful that would be.
A very small thing has been a help and
That is that I keep all records related to this case, in zippered neoprene laptop cases. It’s just a good way to ensure I don’t lose the smallest receipt, even when I have to take paperwork to court, when it’s not a phone hearing.
Thank you for giving me your perspective, and emphasizing what to do to make sure that the process is as effective as possible. I definitely like the idea of being in the driving seat as you described, and your advice reinforces my confidence that I can do it. I will achieve my objectives by taking your perspectives into account, so that the outcome is one that you would celebrate.
The narc family system needs to be sued for intentional infliction of emotional distress. Not talking about divorce cases.
Good points to make making the court care!
something to do would be to have a Daily Journal to keep track of spending but at the same time of daily events and you don't have to write a journal down all you have to do is talk into your phone for the most part and save every day to a draft email that way you can type in search and find whatever topic you want as long as the header of each draft email is labeled the date that you're writing the journal about
The one thing you have to your advantage is that behaviour that the person does to irritate you or inflame you does not necessarily equate well with the court but you have to point that out for example if they continually lie that that's fine but if they lie in the courtroom then they are mud to the judge so you've got to take advantage of their capacity to lie and catch them out
Nice I always want to learn more to protect myself and others!
This video is really dope. I needed the tips and the encouragement at the end.
Thank you🙏🏿
yes! Omg!!!! I absolutly love your... teaching style I guess ... your a brilliant woman ! thank you so very much for your content !!!!! Many blessingings cuzzin!!
This is progress to be able to expose them in divorce. We need a way to hold them accountable when it has been a malignant dangerous one who hurt us in a relationship. I feel like we should be able to press charges for this abuse just as any other type of abuse.
Thanks Miss Rebecca,
For your kind, caring, giving heart...
May God Bless you in all of your endeavors...
What she talks about was 100% how my divorce from a narc went. So frustrating. I never even got the costs of all the motions I won!
Very helpful - now I know I'm divocing a narcis . Subscribed.
My wife has turned my daughter against me and making it look like it’s me and no therapist can pin point it and they say your daughter has anxiety
That’s pretty easy. The therapist needs to ask 1: How do you feel about your Dad. 2: What makes you feel that way. 3: How do you know that Dad did/does/feels that?
And ask the child why they believe something. Is it something someone told them? Or something they actually remember happening with their own memory? Get them to question what is true, where did this idea come from.
Separate facts from opinions.
I had to do this myself because I had thoughts that were not my own rattling around in my head. Maybe from the ex, maybe an overly critical teacher, who knows. IS IT TRUE? It's a great question to ask yourself and have asked if your kids, even if they're adults now.
Kid probably does have anxiety. To not upset mom. Because afraid of mom.
Parental Alienation. That's what happened to me too.
The language of the court, got it.
Ive been in a 9 1/2 divorce. 7 attorneys later and I have had my findings struck, been silenced, no home, no possessions to include inheritance, etc. Nothing was presented on my behalf, ir FL statutes. I had all of my proof against him.
I left with the clothes on by for my life from an abusive triad.
Absolutely deplorable..
Me too! Two trash bags and a restraining order and relocation. Then my GAL ordered me to live within 2 miles and then they ordered no visitation. Now I’m stuck here. 181 motions into my divorce two martial settlement arguments and still said no again.
It’s crazy- he still has 23 semi automatics after the police went to get them still he has them. He still has all of my son and my belongings. Still nothing. No child support nothing- it’s frustrating but we got this!
12 Crates of proof and still nothing in FL courts.
YES
This is so good. My husband scared me so much. He would punch doors etc. I fled with our 1st child to my parents. I went back with him as he apologized for all the drama. We have a second child now and he owns a bar and we don't see much of him except on Sundays. It's ok because I am at peace being with the kids and taking care of the house.
You were crazy not to flee with the first child! Now he's going to make you pay for leaving! It will not get better because he knows YOU'RE SCARED! IT WILL GET WORSE! I had an abusive ex husband! Guess how many kids he got from me!!!!
@@GwendolynPorter-w6c That is a very unkind response. Stay in your own lane.
Everyone does the best with what they have and what they know. We are all here to learn and do not want to experience judgement for our choices while under duress.
That is so twisted. I find it illogical and absurd. No offense-Peace 💫
@@AlishaPurkis I understand because ta similar thing happened to me. I didn’t understand the abuse cycle and that the poor excuse for an apology didn’t hold. 20 years later an another child I saw there was no choice. Jekyll and Hyde came together. Safety was obviously a big problem and my children were in danger too. Fortunately with help from close relatives I was able to get away, and fortunately a shelter was available to me and my children. It took several weeks for me to get a hold on my thoughts which were clouded in fear. I kept a journal in the shelter to help me keep things straight. That involved writing all feelings and thoughts about current situation at the time. I felt very confused but knew I was much better off having left. Years later there are still issues as having some flashbacks that cause me to feel confused again, feeling abandoned by lawyers and courts who said I was doing well in the case though it didn't seem like it to me, the other side being more expensive, meaner, and dishonest to their advantage! In the end, I think it was and is my life and I value every minute of it hard as it was at times. As the saying goes, life isn't a bowl of cherries. It has its pits too.
@@rosieE121 so sorry that happened to you. It's hard to recognize the abuse for sure.
My lawyer turned out to be a narcassistic and I got screwed by them using me as a pawn in their own legal game. Wallmans lawyers in Adelaide Australia were highly abusive towards me. They lied to the judge and for away with abusing me for eight years. I'm a survivor of two npd parents and then got in a relationship where my boyfriend tried to kill me and he got away with it. I won my case but I never had hardly any of my costs cover. I was left out of pocket and suicidal from legal abuse. Two years later I'm just starting to recover now.
Yep...I'm going through this with my brother.. and had to hire a lawyer..against him and his Crooked attorney.
Commenting at the yes part 6:38
I’ve been fighting my son’s father in court for the second time now. It took me this second time being in court to understand this. The first time we went to court I was alone, (he abandoned us, threatened us, you name it.) I was feeling low and when he served me papers for full custody I panicked. I tried to talk about the abuse, (no police reports) and the emotional distress and bullying does not matter to the courts. It’s infuriating that someone like this can just get away with being the worst with no consequences. He got half of my son’s time in court because they’re going to award a father with time. (Even tho I never took it from him he was always welcome to see his son but never showed up)
This time, I have learned that facts matter. I’ve been documenting and planning for him to file another case against me for full custody. I’m not even fighting him, I’m fighting the court. I’m answering the question they want to know, and he can say and do whatever he wants. He can throw all the fits he wants to his lawyers, his delusions of grandeur isn’t enough to take my baby away all because he wants to hurt me. I know his REAL motives, and I have to play the game he throws at me and prove it’s a waste of time. He does nothing that shows the court he should get more parental power than what he has now, he should be in his life and he’s been doing fine. He just needs to not use our son as a pawn to hurt me for whatever delusion reason he wants to hurt me for.
The epitome😊 of a lawyer or judge
Exploitation of others to achieve personal gain. An unwillingness to empathize with others' feelings, wishes, or needs. Intense jealousy of others and the believe that others are equally jealous of them.
Yes! Definitely makes sense!
I just turned up sober.
Fortunately I’ve always knew who I am. Unfortunately I’m pretty easy going and don’t ask for much. I’m independent and don’t need to ask for things. He didn’t know I would stand up for myself. At first I was bowled over. I knew of his traumatic past and showed compassion. But they can’t keep up the love bombing long. Took a few years but his true colors came to light. He slowly started the bullying, accusations, rages(no physical, I think he knew I’d put him away) I told him he could leave me, I began not to engage, I told him if he doesn’t change he’s pushing me out the door. My conditions are we sell everything but our personal vehicles, split it and go our merry ways. So far he’s still here, and trying hard to be normal and not attack. It’s calm but I’m indifferent now. Narcs compulsion is so strong to control, suspect, be the victim. It must be exhausting in their brain.
It's not exhausting to them. They use us as fuel. Protect your energy.
Oooh thank you Rebecca!!! FINALLY 😢😢😢
Makes perfect sense Rebecca
I tried to stick it out and fight for change in the organisation, but then I decided if no-one else was going to fight for change then they must like it.
Now I've worked hard to leave them behind so I can live in peace before required to rest in it.
If all a narcissist in some capacity, judges plates are full .. make it easy … it’s all about the $$ … ugh - the root to Evil… in the interim being abused and striving worth each day😢 where’s the human kindness … we lost it! So sad and pathetic
@@dianacardenas1518 I agree, the only way to get free is to leave without nothing and starting over again because you will never be done with them because it’s about money and control
What about if you don't have a lawyer
@@sommermilhous3594 nothing gets done
Like medical care, our Liberty depends on personally being rich enough.....
Yes and i have given to videos to my last 5 attorneys who never believed, or watched and presented these to the court bour
I was told don’t even mention that he was a narcissist while going through court for domestic violence. The state’s attorneys office shut me down.
Yes, first time hearing this - thank you!
Yes it makes sense but when you are emotionally drained it’s hard to stand up for yourself
Thanks for posting
My abuse has turned my brain to mush. I have documentation I've been saving, but now that it's time to print them out for court, I don't know how to print emails, voicemails, and photos! I have no support system to walk me through these things, so now what? I have a printer, but I can't even set it up to work. And going somewhere? I'm agoraphobic and visually impaired, so driving is a huge hurdle anymore.
It is a horrible position to be in. The world today seems only interested in the almighty dollar. I sought help with legal aid for seniors etc etc etc. And not supposed for free entity was free. No space. No time. No requirements. I am myself caught in a 3 year nightmare that I am hoping ends soon. I would be more than willing to help where I can if we are close. I live in Savannah for now. But going back to the Midwest soon. You can certainly reach out if you would like.
Yes . Ugh, how do they manipulate so many people
They have been practicing all their lives.
Well, one common thing they start doing is called love-bombing, where they make you think that you're the most perfect person they've ever met and they are utterly delighted to get to know you. If we had never heard that term or never heard of narcissism, we'd just think they were infatuated, enthralled, captivated, aka falling in love with us, and making us feel very special. A Covert narcissist can change their behavior at whatever point in time they choose. You can get totally blindsided One Day by something crazy that makes no sense. If you don't understand narcissism, it's super easy to make the situation worse by simply asking them a question. Now they give you the silent treatment. It's all very cold and calculated. Most likely, You're a kind, normal person who had no idea what was going on. I was a senior widow for 10 years, so I was apparently Ripe for the Pickins, as they say.
OMG. The court thing is exactly what happened to me!
Yes, ABSOLUTELY ( the criminal-code, etc.)
Love this info so so powerful!
I survived and now dreading life in my adulthood (Mommy-dearest 👿) is alive in my younger brother, but she was mean all her life. Dad, Michael Martin, married a witch, Brenda Ann Phillips(AKA) Martin Jewell Phillips was her dad
Very practical and useful advices, thank you for sharing
@Rebecca Zung, documenting doesn’t do squat when he has the military training to lock you out of your computer remotely. It doesn’t do any good when he lies to get a restraining order by telling the courts that you said you were going to off your own children (three boys 15, 12, 2 and one girl 5). It was granted immediately 2 year no contact. He wanted me out of the home just so he could get his 18 year old plaything in. And that is barely scratching the surface.
I'm sorry you are going through that. This entire system is broken.
That's exactly what im thinking.
I wish I had seen this 11 years ago, when I was divorcing the narcissist. 😢
I am so grateful for this video!!!
Thank you for explaining better, how Court works.
I was a stay at home mom with no income for 25 years & he filed & I was hoping he would have to pay my lawyer fees especially since he’s dragging it out now for 18 months
Yes, I just found you about 2 weeks ago and have watched a few of your videos. I really wish I had found you a year ago. 40yrs. Of marriage 2 adult children 3 1/3 years of her 3 different attorneys now 2 weeks away from my deposition and court on 10/22 like i feel like no one on base 4 runs behind 9th inning and i am now up at bat. I didn’t understand or have a concept of just how encompassing her narcissism and gas lighting was. I don’t remember which of your videos I was watching when I had to take a seat because of the shock and fear of finally realizing my situation .
Love your posts. Just bought your book "Sly the Bully". How to deal with narcissistic and manipulative boss 😊?
New Sub, a million thanks for saving many lifes!
Thank you.
Good 👍 on the above 🎉
Thank you . 😊😊😊😊
I clicked on this because my ex always tells everybody I'm a narcissist. She got a protective order against me and told the judge that she thinks I was undiagnosed narcissist in court. She doesn't even know what the traits are probably. I'm convinced it was projection in that she's a narcissist, but I have the humidity to assume that there's a high likelihood that I am incorrect.
It's fight or flight either ways it hurts everyone you love.