DIVORCED What Do I Do Now? I How to move on after the divorce | The Sewist
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 9 พ.ย. 2018
- Divorced, What Do I Do NOW?
You just got divorced, now what do you do? How do you deal with the emotions that you are feeling? How do you tell the kids?
Many of you have reached out to me for advice on divorce especially since I shared that I was divorced. It is not easy and you will have to be strong mentally and emotionally what what lies ahead. But never lost faith in Allah or in this path that you are on. Stand tall and strong and you will pull through. Take it day by day and never stop learning from what life puts you through.
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Divorce is better than staying in an abusive relationship......no question
absolutely right👍
Thank you Sister, I needed to hear this. Your advice is appreciated. I was divorced a while ago. I just literally lived for the children and forgot myself. Now my children are young adults and now I find myself alone. Only now after a long time I want to find someone to share my life with. Only I dont know how to go about it.
I am doing an article about life after divorce, would you like to contribute anonymously? x
@legionary anti-illuminati femi-nazi hein?
Kamar deen
I am in the middle of a divorce that I did not want. I wanted to stay married for our 3 year old daughter who deserved a family. I am in tears watching this.. Please pray for me and my little girl.
Ms. M. Aww my darling it breaks my heart reading this and I can’t imagine how you must feel. I pray that Allah gives you the strength to go through this stay strong and have faith that in sha Allah everything will work out ♥️
@@mayyaalsaid Thank you, Sister.
Assalamu alaikum sister
Big HUG x
@@snowflower3456 Big hug back to you Sister. Thanks you
May Allah make it easy.
Divorce is not the end. The longer you stay in an unhealthy marriage, your mind and body become drained and you start becoming a very angry person. It’s best to move on and move away if possible . It will help you in the long run, and your kids can adapt well if you keep them informed in a healthy way .
Divorce isn’t the end of the world. Just like a friendship, they don’t all work out. And divorce especially in my situation where I am still young and divorced with a Daughter, it was just a hurdle for me. And you start working on yourself and building yourself.
But not finished
I’ve been married for 10 years but sadly I’m in a foReign country, 100% financially dependent on him, with two kids and dying to run 😢
I hope you were able to leave
@YasmínFabricio,😞 Going through the exact same thing. How did you deal with your situation?
I'm going through this situation. I got divorce two weeks ago and have a baby boy too. He's just 40 days old.
I can completely understand ur situation may allah bless u
استغفر الله
O Allah help us
آمين
May Allah help you
Allahouma bareek my beautiful sister❤️ I'm a divorced woman with a two years old son and the most painful thing i have faced is that people see us divorcees as a disease. Not knowing that marrying a divorcee is sunnah😔
Sis. Marrying a widow is sunnah. But not divorcee. 😢😭 I don’t know what im doing to do. But all I think now is at the end grave is my destination.
@@rouh salaam. Are you divorced? What’s your age?
@@alifalif179 age doesn't matter sis. Once divorced every man sees you as a used piece burdened on people.
Alhamdulillah Allah subhanAllahu taala made this life temporary but it's better not to go thru this hell.. i understand for some women this is necessary..
This is my message for anyone who isn't married yet. You can avoid divorce by just working on yourself. And Be very very cautious who you marry and know that you attract what you are within. I don't want ANYONE to go thru this. It makes your life no less than hell.
@@rouh maybe don't date muslim men then? considering they treat all women like slaves and they have no lives.
you're so strong. women like you really inspire me
Iqra Axmed Jazaki aallah Khir, you are strong too my love 💕
she's strong indeed❤️
And how have faith in marriage again after divorce? I didn't find it very difficult even though I was pregnant at that time but I find very difficult to accept to meet someone even though I am feeling ready it has been 2 years now. I am scared to be disappointed and suffer again
I got divorced in 2020 and have the same feeling that I don't want to be disappointed again. The anxiety was too much to take but Alhamdulillah with time I have realized that I am not the first and not the last person who will get divorced. There are people out there with much more severe problems than getting divorced: be it hunger, disease, accidents...may Allah keep us all safe and protected and make us thankful for the countless blessings we are bestowed with. We can never be sure if the 2nd marriage will be successful or not but we can try our best and place our hope in Allah that everything that happens is with His will and that is always better for us.
I'm totally broke inside. It's much critical situation 😢😢😥
Dua brother, the salient surahs. And 'AFTER EACH DIFFICULT PHASE, COMES EASE'. I was in a phase from hell, over 30 years. Now it's Paradise, almost.
ان شاء الله
Im sorry to hear whatever happened . Allah knows best and he always makes it easy on his servant during their difficult time . We just have to trust that things will eventually work out when we trust the Almighty ❤️ i truly appreciate your honesty and you helping people out especially women who feels lost and depressed after divorce. Thank you for being a great advisor. May Allah keep you and your familly happy and give u strength to go on in life :) sis please kindly make a seperate video if kids are involved in a divorce matter . Thank you once again sis for taking your time 😘
Plz make dua for me... I don't have any kids .. one yr of abusive marriage.im thinking of ending it but I don't have will power and strength to say it ..
Assalamu alaikum sister
I was in the same situation..I feel your pain..I am grateful that divorce was an option im safe now
ان شاء الله
Assalamualaikum am also facing same relationship my husband loves me but I don't love husband family members
@@sameenasiddique9266 why
Listening to this has made me realise I am the one clinging on. What happens when your wife is very abusive towards you and your family. She’s lied to her family about you so you can’t even speak to them. She Asks for a divorce on a constant basis but you worry for her and care about her. She never listens to anything you say, does things which are wrong on purpose. When you tell her what she is doing is wrong and as her husband I’ve stuck with her and most men wouldn’t take this behaviour, she threatens you with she will find someone else who will take it and she will prove it to you. You stay calm and collected and don’t want to loose her but you can’t see a future with her any more due to her actions and words. We don’t have kids but it is still tough to go through. The mental exhaustion is unbelievable
Thanks honey i needed this. Yes im going through it, I feel very alone and its very hard. Love and light to you habibti xxx
Madam O Tarot sorry to hear that you are going through a rough time, remember that this is only a phase and it shall pass
I am currently going through a divorce ATM. Me and my wife married less than 3 months ago. She left me after 8 days after accusing me off being mentally ill, homosexual. I am neither of them. I have found out she may have potentially have someonelse on the side. I feel so low mentally and this me as a guy speaking
I'm sorry that you're going through this may Allah bless you and grant you Sabr
Thank you sister for your honesty
The best line is You dont know divorce until you are divorced
Me too i realized it after my divorce its very painful still struggling make duaa for me sister my husband left me 2 years ago
Insha Allah Amy Allah gives u good life and peace of life and good health...until ur normal try to talk and mercy each other mistakes and put in Allah hands to try to find each others mistakes and mingle if possible..May Allah give u good futures
Mashallah Sister you are on high level of awareness
Thank you sister for your wise words and stay strong! I am proud of you and am sorry for whatever happened in your past. YOU are worth it, we all are. Your eyes said it all. May Allah bless and your beautiful family !
Am so sorry you had to go through this but Allah knows the best for you and your beautiful girls ❤️❤️
Amina Jaiteh Alhamdulilah, I have full faith in the way aallah has planned our lives for he is the best of planners
I love your aura. May Allah keep blessing you. I feel such good vibes from you.
Me too
she's blessed indeed
one of the best video of this topic love u,bless u, jazak Allah khair..
Barakallahu feeki for this. My husband and I have only been married for 10 months but we've already mutually agreed that divorce is on the cards in the near future as there are many aspects of our individual lives that don't fit well with the other's. It's painful but alhamdulillah.. this video has helped me accept and understand that I'll still have a life afterwards inshallah.. May Allah make it easy for anyone going through divorce ameen.
Ameen. It's a painful process
If you made a decision then don’t waste your life and go ahead.
Great message ❤
Nana Mint thank you ♥️
Salam sister, thank u for posting. It is very much needed.. May I ask u a question?
Asalamualeiklum Habibti. May Allah ta3ala protect and bless your Marriage. It's beautiful to hear how your life turned out for u! I'm unbelievably happy for u and wish you everything good in this Dunya and Akhira. I'm in a difficult desicion right now. We are married abou 2 years and I'm 22 now. The marriage was abusive and we've got high expectations, always fighting. There are little good moments between us. I always thought about giving up and I got mentally ill but I can't let the marriage go. He makes me feel like I'm the worst wife ever and that nothing is good about me. Subhanallah now I feel like it too. I'm living with my parents right now. He didn't divorced me yet and Allahu A3lam how things are going to work out! Usually I'm the one who wants to break things but now I'm not so sure anymore. Alhamdulilah I don't have any kids yet and still study but studying is really hard. Pls make Dua!
Divorce is the cure of a silent disease b/n two souls ✌
I am on the brink of getting divorced from my partner ( I am tired and I want to relax forever )
Thx God there are no children
استغفر الله
May Allah bless you so much more in this life and in the akhira inshallah... 🤗
I got divorced 2 months back and I am still not able to move on. I am not able to forget my past. 24/7 hours he keeps running in my head. Please gimme some tips to move ahead in life.
I feel your pain sis
Read the book Codependent No More
Thanks alot sis
"In order other people to accept you accept yourself first"
Thank you.
Smart, sweet and you are doing many ladies a SERVICE so keep it going on the advice!!! =)
Thank you so much for this video. Very helpful JazakAllah khair
Assalaamu aleikum. So happy to see you back. You have become more beautiful, ma shaa Allah. Pls tell me your beauty secrets.
Your the only one that talks about this topic, there are so many affected but no awareness, maybe if more females like you made videos like these some women will be inspired to move on instead of clinging...
PS If you think you can't afford a place on your own, look ti see if you can become a companion for a senior who just wants somebody there to help with simple things in exchange for free rent. You can still work. This is a win-win. Put out an ad with a different email address. Be prepared! If this goes through, you'll need to be ready.
I am 46 and I spent 21 years in toxic marriage I ask Allah to help me and guide me .
@Honest Servant some people pray for a good marriage and they still get divorced. Allah does what He wills and if He wills a divorce then that is what you will get because this life is a test and that is what that person is tested with. However, not everything is lost. You can keep praying because Allah responds to whom He wills and dua changes qadr.
Alhamdulillah
Thank you very much
مشاكل الشعر your most welcome
Thank you so much
Great introspection Sister. May Allah be with you and your lovely kids. 'AFTER HARDSHIP COMES EASE' Says Allah.
Its going to be three years that I got married.. but I didn't lived with my husband even for two months ..now in the divorce process still I couldn't come out from this ..I'm struggling a lot .. divorce is not easy . seriously I don't feel like getting married again in ma life..
I'm soooo sorry you have to go through this and always stay strong and may Allah bless you and your kids and always help you
Mary Parker Allahuma Ameen May Allah bless us all.
Yes
@@janisarkhan6840 dont talk to me!
@@JahannamHellfire الحمد لله
The truth is very bitter
Sometimes you have to help the spouse to let go by getting a divorce. I was judged as a woman that I initiated it!! I learned not to listen to other people. It's a christian concept to marry till death do us part. I was planning to leave but I did not how.Try not to go back because it will become worse for you.
Very nice
Yes please make the video.
Zeinab Khamis do you mean the one a bit staying in a marriage because of the kids?
@@mayyaalsaid yes. Sorry i was in a haste i wasn't a bit more specific but yes I'll really appreciate it if you do. Thank you .
Thank you
You're welcome :)
life as we know does not end with divorce. it's just that couples thrive on keeping their love alive at all cost even if it means sacrificing their relationship and children in the process. ofcourse, because it is all built on love (so it seems).. and at that stressed up point, we either choose the love or we choose the relationship. hard decision to make.
Love your videos.How can I write to you?
It's the hard thing..to let go and accept
thanks I'll just get divorced and iam not understanding what should I'll do I have one child 5 yrs iam never want this divorced she take ...pray for my child
I m getting through this... May Allah swt help me and others who r suffering.. its the worst feeling 😭😭
ان شاء الله
I Love You so much.
Ana bahebak awy ya gameela. How lucky would be this one who marry you. You are extraordinary and you deserve to be happy. What you had of sadness you will get of happiness insha'Allah.
Hopefully you kept your head up and are still here for you children El hamdulillah.
I wish you to be blessed by God more and more and your children too. Keep living your life fill of surprises because sometimes we don't see the good surprises coming in the dark period
But no matter how long the night lasts, the day will come.
Salam aleeki 😘💕 and thank you for sharing such a video full of good advice to keep in a corner of our mind all along our life. And full of emotions.
Beatrice Cazal your words and duas mean more than you know. May Allah bless our ummah with patience, love and compassion.
I love you too 💕 and I can relate about the fact that no matter how dark days are or how difficult times become there is ALWAYS light at the end of it.
Stay blessed
Al haqq. Don’t worry sister.
Please sister make the video about staying. Jazakallahu khairan
I m in the middle of divorce.. bt I don't want.. I have a 5 years old son. don't know what to do 😓😓😓😓😓. Suffered alot.. bt am ready for re try..bt 😓.. keep me in your dua. Asalamu alaikum
Walekumasslam
Thank you for this brave video sister Masha’Allah. When you remarried did you lose custody of your children?
It was somehow clear in her former videos about " steps for a happy marriage", that she was in fact not happy.
I really want to be your friend your personality remind me my best ever friend..
My mama..
lera estores I know, she’s so beautiful within
Thank you, Mayya! Many women need this. How are your darling daughters? And how is Oscar, your cat?
Yasmine M your welcome thank you for asking about us, Alhamdulilah I will be sharing an update video on Saturday in sha Allah
@@mayyaalsaid u r such a noble person ,sister can u pray for me Allah give me strong iman in my heart and fill my heart with his love ,qurans and prophets love ameen
I reaaally love what emanates from your face.. I think it's your noor.. May Allah protect you sister!
Franglish & Spanglish Allahuma Ameen May be protect us all thank you very sweet of you to say so ♥️
How valuable are those muslims, who help each other for the sake of Allah Almighty. Indeed this worldly life is very short 😥😥.
May Allah protect our Iman and give us ability for good deeds with sincerity. Ameen
Nice
SO getting divorced is nice? Do you even know how hard that is?
Mary Parker I didn’t sad divorce is pleasant, on the contrary it isn’t. Yes i do know that it’s like if you watched the video you would know that I was divorced.
It's been a while 🥰💙
Asalaamu alaykum dear sister...can you please make a video about staying married for the children? I have three and have been married almost 8 years now, but I'm not in a good place with my husband and have been contemplating divorce for a while now. I have been trying to make things better in the last few years, but it just seems to be getting worse. I considered staying in the relationship for the kids, but I don't know if that's exactly the healthy thing to do. Your advice is appreciated.
I know it’s been two years since you replied but I just want to know how are you going now?
You inspire me sister, may Allah reward you. Please could you be my coach? I already sent you a mail through the website, but got no reply. Kindly tell me how to reach you, thanks
Thank you habibti maya I need all ur advises as I’m now a single mom to a little baby girl Jazaki allah khair we need more videos about divorce
As it guides me ❤️❤️❤️
Jay Beanz your most welcome, sorry to that about the end of your marriage. I pray that Allah gives you strength to overcome this.
Jay Beanz so happy to know that my videos are helping I promise to try my best to always make videos that matter 💕
Thank u dear plz remember me in ur duas
That allah swt
يعوضني خير أنا وطفلتي
I love when u said my marriage ended but not my life
To be honest my life just started now alhamdulillah
I am sorry to hear that, I am also divorced with 3 children, people judge you differently, all of sudden you have no friends.
I'm trying
May Allah reward you ameen
I was the one who asked for a divorce while I still loved him most, it hurts. It was a very ugly divorce. But still, I have to do it, masyaAllah this is really hard for me and my kid.. eventhough everyone , including my parents who knows what really happened told me that it was a right thing to do for me, but still there is a guilt inside of me for this failure. I hope And I believe I can through this, InsyaAllah.. thankyou for sharing..
I ask my husband to let me go because my co wife don't want to see me anytime she hear about me or sees me, she will curse me. And my husband don't want to address.
I av 1 child and she av 7 children.
I'm with our husband at different place and she is with the kids alone.
I advice my husband to take proper care of them but she is still furious everyday because she complain about in adequate care and attention.
Their fight nearly lead to divorce and I'm the one she is cursing for letting he passing through the pains.
And I'm willing to let go of our husband to take proper care of them.
Subscribed
Its not always bot HAVE HAD ENUF !! sometimes one of dem just dont wana continue n dey only know de best Y....sometimes mostly husbands are having an extra marital affair n dey wana kick der good wife outa der lives.....der r 100s of diff reasons 4/of divorce n has hardly or rarely 2 do wd HAVING HAD ENUF😊
YES totally.....number reason that is why their heart and soul become damaged and they can't desire their wife anymore. Zina is too easy for men and a blind eye is taken to it.
If you really want to talk to somebody.
Talk to another person who got divorced
Dont entertain others because specially in Asia people are happy when we are grieving.
Aameen ya rabbal aalaameen shukran
May Allah make ease for all those who are in problems. May Allah Almighty grant every brother and sister in Islam a strong Iman and good health. Give us success in the test of grave and on the day of Judgement. Ameen
For you to say the one driving it is in a better position is not true at all.. Maybe they were forced into that position. It’s Tough, it’s very tough.
True the man can force her to ask for khula
Very informative video ❤️❤️
Assalam walikum sis I'm going through a divorce right now my idda pierod finishes tomorrow inshallah an I'm still emotional about it what should I do and yes I'm the clingy one any advice on what I should do
As salamu alaykum sister, I just wanted to check on you and see how things are now? I am the clingy one but he has mentally and physically moved on to another woman but we still live together and it’s hard to move on and this all feels like torture.
Which country are you from,,,
It's only been 3 months to our marriage. 1st few weeks was perfect but later on, every one and other week we are in a fight on something. I have tried to make things ok by asking my parents to talk him, but my husband got even more angry because I shared our situation with my parents and that they tried to solve thing between us by talking him. I want to hold on this but this is too hard that I am losing my mind and feeling depressed. My parents already want me to get a divorce from him. But, he doesn't want to give a divorce either, also didn't even try to make things worse. Instead he keeps on saying things that makes me feel more week and sad. I am so hopeless and tired of my life.
What’s the update sister? Are you ok??
My Allah s.w bless you abundantly...
Assalamualikum.
I'm a Muslim wanna marry a divorced women.
Need good morals character comes in your life
😢😢
Plz ! Give us the translation in your videos
You look like my sister
Alhamdulillah
MashaAllah 👋
I have recently ended up with khula but the point is was not interested at all to leav my partner but she left me with her arrogant nature looking for a fresh start I'm from karnataka
Currently divorced 2days now with a baby on the way.
Assalamu alaykum ❤️ ♥ ❤
Slm
🧡❤
maya انتي يمنية؟
🥰
Is divorce already destined?
You seem to be really sad from within !
Well, you shouldn't !
Everything happens for a good reason and God knows what's best !
Bushra AlAjmi I am sad because people are very quick to judge divorcees. Allah has blessed with me husband and I am now happily married Alhamdulilah
@@mayyaalsaid
Happy for you :)
Just think of it this way , that God sent your ex away so you can be with someone better for you :)
And don't you ever think of what people say , haters gonna hate , and people always talk and judge !
I feel sorry for them really ! Just pray for them to find something more beneficial to do in their lives .
Please make dua for me
Diverse is better than wife's secret terrorising.all case different. children issue both response
نريد تسويي سب تايتل لاني ما افهم شي 😇
K_ gym99 شنو سبتايتل 😂🌴
قولي ترجمه
I married a Egyptian man we are been 2years and 3mnth of being marriage.and he devorce me only in words.they called it talag,talag,talag he say it 3x..should I believe on this or I should.go and move.on I dont know.by the way I'm pilipina.
Sister if he said to u talag 3 time that mean divorce is done in the Islamic way
استغفر الله
brothers and sisters must know their right to divorce in islam before they commit to each other in marriage. there are *careful steps* before, during and after.
if he proposes her again then she may re-marry him for the 2nd time. and then again for the 3rd time, but not for the 4th time in a row. after this she can't re-marry her ex-husband unless she marries another.
three times divorce 'at once' example; repeating the word 'talaq' in 'one sitting' should get counted as 'one divorce', only because it is generally supported by Qur'an 4/59
@@omairbinenam6337 brother that is incorrect, the quran says if you divorce a woman 2 times you can marry but the 3 times whether in one go or separate occasions even spanning over years you are divorced and its counted as 3 as you pronounced it 3 times. You can not remarry after that. The woman needs to marry another and naturally divorce/widow it can not be planned even. Studying fiqh of divorce will tell you this. Should be careful before giving any information unless 100% sure as it could lead to someone committing a grave sin.
@@wonderingtraveller4786 and what about verse 4/59 of the Qur'an? Return the conflicting matters to Allah and his messenger s.a.w.? Will you not then return to what messenger s.a.w. did? for instance he s.a.w. considered 3 divorces given in one go as 1 only.
*Sahih Muslim*
Abu al-Sahba' said to Ibn 'Abbas:
Enlighten us with your information whether the three divorces (pronounced at one and the same time) were not treated as one during the lifetime of Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) and Abu Bakr. He said: It was in fact so, but when during the caliphate of 'Umar (Allah be pleased with him) people began to pronounce divorce frequently, he allowed them to do so (to treat pronouncements of three divorces in a single breath as -one- three).