Wooo-wee! Another banger. Just how do we do it? Tune in next week as we unveil some of our delectable live-action offerings. Road to 100k subs lays before us brothers. WE MARCH!
Well well.. He has blond hair, blue eyes and his teeth are white and haven't grown in or outwards. He is considered a beautiful specimen of the Anglo Saxon group in any timeline.
It's funny how when you first see John Smith, he's disturbing looking... then he gets worse... and then you see John Rolfe and suddenly John Smith looks almost normal.
i like how pocahontas is just an adorable, simply drawn little girl and then the englishmen are just eldritch horrors beyond human comprehension. very accurate.
No, after she responds to his question of do they have laws with a yes, he just says well nevermind. She still about to get kidnapped and graped though.
The real Pocahontas jumped onto the English ship and went to live to England, she hated being a native lol. Then she died of smallpox. Too bad they didn't read the historical one, it has so much meme potential.
@@nathanwhitmore3980 I dont know why I thought the taj mahal was older and that pocahontas lived later than the 1600s, I should probably brush up on my early American history... and history in general...
@@elithornton5217 no no, you can just hear the pronunciation of the h when he says it, indeed it may be “hEEEEEELLLLLOOOO DARRRRRRLIIIIIIINNNNNN” but it is definitely there. He is after all an oh-so intelligent and well educated Englishman, and Englishmen after all always know how to pronounce their words. That and the fact that if we don’t, we simply blame it on the inability of others to understand what is after all an easy to understand and pronounce language (just possibly dripping with sarcasm).
Smallpox is exceedingly overrated. The Spanish allied with many Native Americans to beat the Aztecs, and those allies were perfectly healthy fighting alongside the Spanish, so smallpox isn't why the US is devoid of Native Americans. It's because the British and the Germans who joined them genocided them, as the US already admitted. But most Spanish speakers are brown by birth because they're not European at all. Countries like México lie to the people claiming that most are mixed, but that's just a desperate attempt at finidng some common thing to base unity on. If the Mayans see themselves more as Mayans than Mexicans, then their desire for independence would be greater. Also, many Hispanics don't identify as Native American because they forgot their roots due to globalization or whatever. In Tenochtitlán most deaths were from starvation due to the siege, not smallpox. Therefore, you don't even need "v4 xin a shun" (2bypasscensors) which are all overrated and scams. History proves it. Freethinkers can accept this.
@@scintillam_dei Mexicans are mixed. Technically theyre not even an ethnic group rather the product of two distinct ethnic groups, like logic or michael jackson. Ok maybe not MJ but u get the point. Thats why theres different shades of mexican. Some have more native blood than others but overall most mexicans look like a 50/50 blend of spaniard and native
@@plugmanjohnson7456 no tf they don’t, there’s a small percentage of people who can trace their roots back to Spain but other than that most people in Mexico look like natives. The other dude is right it’s just that they’ve lost their roots or are just ashamed of their roots since people still shit on them
@@defyjayy8335 They're mestizos. Each Mexican is between 30% to 70% native as a rule, with minor exceptions (more native in the south, less native among self-claimed "whites" except recent white migrants). Check out some research with "ADMIXTURE analysis".
@@kissme1518 1:03 Not just that. Right before he ask he does a more subtle up and down. Then he quickly shifts left and right to make sure nobody is there (they even squeak). Then we get the big up and down. Just funny that it all happens so fast an fluid.
"Say, how...how old are you?" "Have they invented laws here yet?" Those are two questions that should never be asked together. Also, Pocahontas is adorable is this artstyle.
@@krnt13 It's three hundred years too early. You have the King's Men instead! But unfortunately they're too busy dealing with Papists who're clearly a far greater threat. What's that look on your face? You wouldn't happen to be a heathen, would you?
As an Englishman, I am appalled! These Englishmen are FAR too handsome. These unrealistic body expectations put a lot of pressure on the rest of us! And we only shout ELLO DARLIN on bank holidays and at Christmas parties. Never while in "India"!
Learn about european history , before outsiders civilizied it , learn about your gentile fore fathers. btw y dna CF is of japheth , so native americans are related to you
@@lawrencetalbot8346 Man don't be triggered lol) Now I'll be your fellow debate bro and have a discussion on the data you brought up. Just because a group of people didn't wear clothes doesn't mean they were savage, such people as greeks, romans, and ect didn't really wear clothes, however they weren't considered savage. "they were very dirty" Actually believe it or not, they were very clean for all standards in history above average in cleanliness. We have no right to say they were very violent therefore savage, because we were just as(or more) violent. So you maybe asking why were they called savage? Well it was mostly adopted in the 1790s as a justification in moral terms, so they needed a reason to justify their cost and morals. There on carried on from there to more extreme ends. While I could be wrong about all of this, From my research and philosophy this seems to be the case here. Because you got to remember: "History is Written by Victors." I do believe this is a important conversation to have lemme know whatcha think. I can also source my data if you are interested in looking deeper into this topic.
“I’m considered to be one of the more handsome ones.” Looking outside my window, yeah he’s not wrong. ALSO GAWD DAMN he was right, I didn’t even register that second guy as a human being at first
Now, now, let us remember that Johnathan Smith is a gentleman who would never break a law. Even despite continually being driven mad by the evil pagan sun and general lack of civility.
“Well, since we’ve decided that we own this land now, I guess our own laws are all that matter!” “Weren’t you going to break them either way?” *”YES.”*
Two of the most mutated monsters earth ever vomited up ask a small child morally ambiguous questions and the poor girl looks like she trying her best not to stare directly at the cthulu spawn that popped out of the woods next to the king of sun burn. I laughed way too hard at this.
As a Spaniard, I laugh extra hard at how the Brits are mocked by all here. I love it! There's a reason most skin cancer cases last I checked were in Australia. Brits dont' belong there! And Spaniards were there before the British, as I proved in mys eries on the overrated Brutish Empire of macro-evolutionist racist shit stains.
gotta love when a horrifying history about an 11 year old innocent native girl who gets kidnapped and r-ped by a group of utter racist murderers gets turned into a silly childrens story and a disney film (pocahontas moment)
1:29 The sheer terror on her face, Jesus. Also took me a while to realize why they didn't know what the Sun was, but that was probably the best joke in the video. Good job!
The British travel to Spain to discover the sun. Here's a fun fact that will humiliate any Brit. My ancestors of Iberia were Romans. One of the legions that conquered most of Celtic Albion (Britain) was LEGIO IX HISPANA. Therefore, I have told the proud Brits who look down on my people, that Iberians pissed on Albion before the Anglo-Saxons arrived to kiss where they pissed! :-) A particular British lady if I can use the word loosely, remarked that I was being childish. So laughing is childish now. Pathetic Brits. No defense against that truth. Glad that London is become Londonistan. They have undone the Reconquistas. Charles Martel would have their heads. Such fools liberals are, importing the enemy. At least the Muslims will execute the sodomites soon enough.
Good to see you not belittling and making us English look bad. Really does make me feel like you have done your best to accurately depict the people of our fine country.
You can tell he's an authentic Englishman because he goes from normal to sunburn after about 30 seconds of unobstructed exposure to the sun As a British person myself I can confirm if it was not for all the trees clouds and bad weather all of us would basically combust
When Smith asked about the sun, I first thought he was just playing stupid so he could keep the conversation going with her...but it's because of the weather in England of course.
My favorite part is I saw John Smith, and my first though was “his teeth are a little messed up, but they’re not nearly British enough”. And then John Rolf showed up and I said “Oh, there we go”
Pocahontas was actually a nickname given to her by the tribe that meant "Naughty One". Her real name was Matoaka. Apparently her mother also had the nickname "Pocahontas" when she was alive.
@@someperson9999Hope WE soon Go to space so i can meet a pocahonta tau and can creat my owne horrific pedo crime WHO then gets Turn into a adorabel children movie
I'm fairly surprised that you have managed not to draw an another grotesque abomination but a pretty adorable girl. That's definitely not something that happens too often
Weird. I just picture Darjeeling, Orange Pekoe, Assam, Earl Grey, and Rosehip drinking tea while driving British tanks. As always Japan does entertainment best. The French team is quite funny as well. "Let them eat cake." A very fitting statement for all of us tax serfs around the world regardless of where we live.
Remember kids, She was "not forcefully" married and worked on Rolfs tobacco farm after totally converting to Christianity and having his children and died in England being the first American to die in England and totally didn't die from disease or poisoning.
@@biggusdickus2166 “Nobody could understand her, then she got sick and died.” The majority of interactions between indigenous people and European settlers in a nutshell.
Another Fun Fact: The British did not start calling it India until after they conquered all of it over a hundred years after Columbus. At this point everything from Pakistan to Indonesia would be referred to as the Indies.
@@youtubestudiosucks978 John Ralph didn't kill her people for sport. Read a history book, and stop regurgitating revisionist, sensationalized historical events as facts.
@@chaoticbliss4169 John Smith never raped Pocahontas. For starters, he wasn't even in Virginia when she was taken hostage due to him being sent back to England in 1609 after being injured in a gunpowder accident, 4 years before Pocahontas was held. John Smith may have been a lot of things, but a creep wasn't one of them.
Before going to America John Smith worked as a mercenary and fought through all of Europe from Spain all the way to Wallachia (Romania). Mercenary, knight, prince, slave, explorer, slave trader - this guy experienced everything.
Didn't it come out that Smith falsified half of that? Historical records written by nobles who knew him said he was known to brag and lie a lot. He wasn't popular with the women, an incel pretty much. Disney's adaption of Pocahontas was written by Smith. Edit: I didn't see the "prince" part. Lol I didn't realize you were making a history joke.
@@TailsFetish with the current culture fighting them right now I don't think they have the money to start pushing furry bait they already kind of pissed the furry community with gadget and that fly hooking up that was funny they did this the despite you people.
@Tyler Kudo I mean the yanks screwed over literally everyone while the British were willing to bankrupt themselves preventing a single empire from dominating Europe, but yeah don't trust the Brits. They like... Released India as an independent nation and stuff.
@Tyler Kudo Fair point with the Boer camps. The transatlantic slave trade was neither started by Britain or the only transcontinental slave trade at the time. But Britain did end it, deploying an entire fleet with the expressed purpose of hunting slave ships, forcing African monarchs to abandon the practice, and taking on loans to free slaves that wouldn't be paid off until 2015. Literally hundreds of years spent combatting slavery. Yeah, Britain caused a famine in India. It had nothing to do with merchants screwing over people they regarded as foreign heathens, nothing to do with the countries India would normally buy food from in times of shortage being invaded/conquered by Japan, and certainly nothing to do with the British government seeing Hitler as more of a priority. Britain just felt like causing a famine. Ask a single native tribe if Americans ever kept their word. If one single agreement was honoured beyond "You're gonna stay on this reservation in a state of economic stasis."
@Tyler Kudo Your comment just leaves me bewildered. The Caribbean colonies? So Jamaica, Barbados, Leeward islands, and the Bahamas? You think they were vying for a monopoly against a literal empire with a fleet bigger than the two largest rivals combined? For what exactly? "A monopoly on the slave trade to England"? What slave trade? Slavery had been banned in England in the early 1700's, and they were more than capable of buying them straight from Africa. They weren't setting up plantations in Sussex. I just don't understand your comment. Also Britain was on the whole reliable when dealing with the natives. It was only after both the empire and France lost their north American territory that the natives in America found themselves not bordering two empires vying for their support against each other, but a single empire looking to expand. Not counting Canada of course because running it was a feat in itself, let alone sending troops through it.
@@Azraelseraphim If your talking about Muhammed and Aisha that was so normal they did even care, it was 1400 years ago lol what do you expect. Also you would be surprised by how common 16 year laws are or how many loopholes exist even if its 18.
Wooo-wee! Another banger. Just how do we do it? Tune in next week as we unveil some of our delectable live-action offerings. Road to 100k subs lays before us brothers. WE MARCH!
Ok
Ok
So humble! Wow
London.
right, right.
"I'm an englishman! And considered quite a handsome one at that!"
I didn't believe him until John Rolfe came out of the bush.
Well well.. He has blond hair, blue eyes and his teeth are white and haven't grown in or outwards. He is considered a beautiful specimen of the Anglo Saxon group in any timeline.
It's funny how when you first see John Smith, he's disturbing looking... then he gets worse... and then you see John Rolfe and suddenly John Smith looks almost normal.
Yeah I don't get it what's up with Smith's teeth. They are white, they are not crooked, no gap between them wtf
Johnathan Smith's an Englishman. Considered quite a handsome one, at that.
@@hobomike6935i can see
After seeing Rolfe I started to understand why Smith is considered a handsome english man
YOu mean hot
i like how pocahontas is just an adorable, simply drawn little girl and then the englishmen are just eldritch horrors beyond human comprehension. very accurate.
True
Thank god the Bri'ish don't exist.
@@EternalEmperorofZakuul got some bad news for you buddy😬😬😬
@@slatebeatz3795 please be joking
Pocahontas was actually really ugly if you single google a historical picture of her .
The most inaccurate part is the fact the Englishman respected the local laws.
😂😂😂
No, after she responds to his question of do they have laws with a yes, he just says well nevermind. She still about to get kidnapped and graped though.
He asked because he needed to know if he was going to have to use the English crown as a divine excuse for his actions.
@@gofriskyourself-truepacife6025 He says this like: "Huh? My job is a little bit harder then."
@@gofriskyourself-truepacife6025not accurate, sex before marriage was one of the worst things you could do back then.
It's weird seeing a mix of animation with a real-life Englishman green screened into the cartoon
Took me a while but I get it
That was clearly CGI. Teeth was too good to be a britbong.
True, historically Brits never failed to send their finest gentlemen as ambassador to foreign lands.
Big ups to Tom n Dom for surviving the Englishman's breath
🤣
It sure is a good thing that Pocahontas directed the English gentlemen to the Taj Mahal and nothing awful occurred
The real Pocahontas jumped onto the English ship and went to live to England, she hated being a native lol. Then she died of smallpox.
Too bad they didn't read the historical one, it has so much meme potential.
@@nicak777alex9 She didn’t “hate being native”, she was taken back to England by force.
@@nicak777alex9 sources please
@@mj91212 .. Oh just wait till CRT!!🙄🙄🙄It’s going to be more idiotically..
@@bakerboy5682 "My source is that I made it the fuck up!"
The "ELLO DAHLINNN!!!" cracked me up way harder than it should have.
Good job.
'Ello!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 'Elllllllllllllo! Gollum.
I return to this video often to replay it 😂
As an English man myself: i am thankful to you for showing a historically accurate image of my ancestors 🌹♥️
😂😂😂😂😂
I did not think that a swarthy man from Pakistan is an Englishman by nation.
Not just ancestors
You have my thoughts and prayers
You look like the furthest thing from an Englishman
Adorablness of Pocahontas contrasted with the sheer beauty of these fine chaps is a thing to behold.
Construction on the Taj Mahal wasn’t even started until 1631AD. The same year John Smith died...
@@nathanwhitmore3980 Huh.....
@@nathanwhitmore3980 irony for the video
@@nathanwhitmore3980 irony for the video
@@nathanwhitmore3980 I dont know why I thought the taj mahal was older and that pocahontas lived later than the 1600s, I should probably brush up on my early American history... and history in general...
That second character was fantastic, especially with the “hellllo Darlinnnnn” really made feel like I was among fellow countrymen
Dude that’s so wrong…
It was ‘ELLLOOOO DARLINNNNN!”
@@elithornton5217 no no, you can just hear the pronunciation of the h when he says it, indeed it may be “hEEEEEELLLLLOOOO DARRRRRRLIIIIIIINNNNNN” but it is definitely there. He is after all an oh-so intelligent and well educated Englishman, and Englishmen after all always know how to pronounce their words. That and the fact that if we don’t, we simply blame it on the inability of others to understand what is after all an easy to understand and pronounce language (just possibly dripping with sarcasm).
FFFAAAAAAHHKIN' ELL!
Indeed
*sips tea. Throws cup at orphan*
OMG that's Nightmare Fuel 1:30
'Thank god those brave gentlemen were there to save that young girl from a life of savagery'
You guys nail it honestly XD
She sounds so cute when she says “Sun” like she’s fucking terrified and confused but still willing to be helpful
Dude, they are literally british
@@Rum-grandpaI can tell that
Pocahontas was probably the most human and normal looking character they've ever drawn yet
When in reality she would of been the most haggard and feral.
Idk I think Widow and Hawkeye have her beat
@@JustaCastle where?
@@Ttegegg they made an avengers cartoon
hmm
Thank you for respecting the British people by representing them with the most beautiful members of their community.
These are racist stereotyped caricatures of Anglo-Saxons. Hatred against Anglo-Saxons must stop.
#StopAnglo-Hate #AngloLivesMatter
I am slightly more beautiful but I agree with your point.
least unattractive britishmen
you mean bri*sh
Really smoothed out their teeth though.
“Have they invented laws here, is the crux of my question” 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
This is actually terrifying
Wanna know the scariest part? Englishmen are real
@@priestofronaldaltAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA…… Read More
@@priestofronaldalt proof there is no God
@@Taha_AI hate you😂😂
@@priestofronaldaltthat's a happy fact
I like that you guys accurately portrayed Jonathan Smith, even to him coughing up small pox for the local population.
I am your 100 th likw
Smallpox is exceedingly overrated. The Spanish allied with many Native Americans to beat the Aztecs, and those allies were perfectly healthy fighting alongside the Spanish, so smallpox isn't why the US is devoid of Native Americans. It's because the British and the Germans who joined them genocided them, as the US already admitted. But most Spanish speakers are brown by birth because they're not European at all. Countries like México lie to the people claiming that most are mixed, but that's just a desperate attempt at finidng some common thing to base unity on. If the Mayans see themselves more as Mayans than Mexicans, then their desire for independence would be greater. Also, many Hispanics don't identify as Native American because they forgot their roots due to globalization or whatever.
In Tenochtitlán most deaths were from starvation due to the siege, not smallpox. Therefore, you don't even need "v4 xin a shun" (2bypasscensors) which are all overrated and scams. History proves it. Freethinkers can accept this.
@@scintillam_dei Mexicans are mixed. Technically theyre not even an ethnic group rather the product of two distinct ethnic groups, like logic or michael jackson. Ok maybe not MJ but u get the point. Thats why theres different shades of mexican. Some have more native blood than others but overall most mexicans look like a 50/50 blend of spaniard and native
@@plugmanjohnson7456 no tf they don’t, there’s a small percentage of people who can trace their roots back to Spain but other than that most people in Mexico look like natives. The other dude is right it’s just that they’ve lost their roots or are just ashamed of their roots since people still shit on them
@@defyjayy8335 They're mestizos. Each Mexican is between 30% to 70% native as a rule, with minor exceptions (more native in the south, less native among self-claimed "whites" except recent white migrants). Check out some research with "ADMIXTURE analysis".
I love all the rapid suspicious eye movements he does when asking how old she is. Legit great subtle animation
You mean how he looked her up and down
@@kissme1518 1:03 Not just that. Right before he ask he does a more subtle up and down. Then he quickly shifts left and right to make sure nobody is there (they even squeak). Then we get the big up and down.
Just funny that it all happens so fast an fluid.
Pocahontas avoiding eye contact at all cost with John Ralph was my favorite. Very realistic for an incredibly uncomfortable situation lmao
Why, you love pedophiles or something?
He really asked her that thank God I didn’t choke on my water and die🤣🤣🤣🤣☠️☠️☠️
This really is a miracle of animation. Especially the horror of John Rolfe cocking that pistol.
"Oh, John Rolfe."
Just gets me every time. 😂
As a Brit, I can confirm that John Smith is indeed a hansom chap. Bloody good show!
quite bloody in deed
ℑ𝔫𝔡𝔢𝔢𝔡 𝔜𝔬𝔲 𝔍𝔬𝔩𝔩𝔶 𝔒𝔩𝔡 ℭ𝔥𝔞𝔭 🍺
Definitely better looking than that other guy who looks like a vampire who hasn't washed himself for months
Ikr?
Lol even when met with foul depiction the commonee just sees representation
Alright, im impressed. I never knew you guys would step it up and start using full face scanning for your second channel. The detail is so realistic.
LOL
Oof
top kek
Apply cold water to burnt area
Meatcanyon inspired
'ELLO DARLIN' such a British thing, I'm dying 😂
I love how the sun is just cooking him😂😭 and the pure terror on Pocahontas's face poor thing.😭
I’d like to take a second to say that the art style Pocahontas is in is super adorable. How the hell do you make such contrasting art 😭
you sell your soul to the devil *cough* i mean the god emperor.
The other two weren't art. Those were actual British male supermodels green screened.
Which is hilarious because she looked like a shaved horse in real life.
That's what happens when you spend too much time with Hunter.
Thats mainstream for hentai!
"Say, how...how old are you?"
"Have they invented laws here yet?"
Those are two questions that should never be asked together.
Also, Pocahontas is adorable is this artstyle.
Should I call the FBI...
No history already ran its course
we can’t stop something cemented in stone…
@@krnt13 It's three hundred years too early. You have the King's Men instead! But unfortunately they're too busy dealing with Papists who're clearly a far greater threat. What's that look on your face? You wouldn't happen to be a heathen, would you?
at least he asked. pretty sure no settler in history ever asked.
Flashgitz does a better job at making Pocahontas than Disney
Of course. They had to age her up a little so it wouldn't be much weird
"And considerate quite handsome one at that."
And who would have thought he's serious.
As an Englishman, I am appalled! These Englishmen are FAR too handsome. These unrealistic body expectations put a lot of pressure on the rest of us! And we only shout ELLO DARLIN on bank holidays and at Christmas parties. Never while in "India"!
Correct, in the Indies it should be "OY LASS, COME KISS YER DADDY".
This is funny, thanks for looking at this with good fun and not being sensitive (like many others here) about it 😂
As a white man I am actually pretty offended. The savages were called savage for a reason. They didn’t wear clothes, were very dirty, and very violent
Learn about european history , before outsiders civilizied it , learn about your gentile fore fathers. btw y dna CF is of japheth , so native americans are related to you
@@lawrencetalbot8346 Man don't be triggered lol) Now I'll be your fellow debate bro and have a discussion on the data you brought up. Just because a group of people didn't wear clothes doesn't mean they were savage, such people as greeks, romans, and ect didn't really wear clothes, however they weren't considered savage.
"they were very dirty" Actually believe it or not, they were very clean for all standards in history above average in cleanliness. We have no right to say they were very violent therefore savage, because we were just as(or more) violent.
So you maybe asking why were they called savage? Well it was mostly adopted in the 1790s as a justification in moral terms, so they needed a reason to justify their cost and morals. There on carried on from there to more extreme ends. While I could be wrong about all of this, From my research and philosophy this seems to be the case here.
Because you got to remember: "History is Written by Victors."
I do believe this is a important conversation to have lemme know whatcha think. I can also source my data if you are interested in looking deeper into this topic.
“I’m considered to be one of the more handsome ones.”
Looking outside my window, yeah he’s not wrong.
ALSO GAWD DAMN he was right, I didn’t even register that second guy as a human being at first
must have been a welshman
Oh no, those pesky W*lsh
I thought it was some sort of tree monster for a second before my eyes drifted up and realized it was looking back at me
Yeah, he looked like some kind of giant rodent.
@@DonPatrono that's what happens when you crossbreed humans with sheep XD
1:27 never ceases to make me laugh out loud
ELLO DARLIN! DO YOU KNOW WHERE THE TAJ MAHAL IS?
Their appearances are a perfect representation of what they are down to the soul.
"Have they invented laws here yet?"
Like anyone in history has ever asked permission...
Now, now, let us remember that Johnathan Smith is a gentleman who would never break a law. Even despite continually being driven mad by the evil pagan sun and general lack of civility.
“Well, since we’ve decided that we own this land now, I guess our own laws are all that matter!”
“Weren’t you going to break them either way?”
*”YES.”*
he just ask if there´s any, not that they gonna respect them
Well behaved colonist never made history. 💅🏻
@@xxNephlimxx "history"
I think you're putting too much of a positive light on that word, especially in _this context_ lmao
This cartoon does a historically accurate and realistic depiction of the average English man. My props to the team doing the research.
Cartoon? I thought it was live action with an animated background!
I wonder how cool it'd be if people made fun of black people just as much as they make fun of Brits💀
@@Kumorini Many people do.
@@Kumorini yes
@@Kumorini think there's a difference between making fun of a nationality and a whole race...
I love how the bodies are completely normal but the heads are mutated and downright disturbing
Two of the most mutated monsters earth ever vomited up ask a small child morally ambiguous questions and the poor girl looks like she trying her best not to stare directly at the cthulu spawn that popped out of the woods next to the king of sun burn.
I laughed way too hard at this.
"most mutated monsters"? These are just run of the mill chaps.
“Mutated monsters “ ehem the proper term is “Englishman”
As a Spaniard, I laugh extra hard at how the Brits are mocked by all here. I love it!
There's a reason most skin cancer cases last I checked were in Australia. Brits dont' belong there! And Spaniards were there before the British, as I proved in mys eries on the overrated Brutish Empire of macro-evolutionist racist shit stains.
Your comment got me absolutely dying and crying of laughter
No matter how many times I watch this or show other people, the 'ELLOWH DARLIN'!!! always has me rolling 💀💀
Your name is Spanish, and you look it. Let us all remember as Spaniards, to piss towards England.
for me it’s Erereer
'ELLO DARLIN'
John Ralph - 2022
Quote of the year
Yoooo 😂😂😂😂😂
SaY, Do YoU KnOw WhErE ThE tAj MaHaL Is?
0:56 he ain’t lying guys this is our highest standards🇬🇧
I love the contrast between pocahontas’ cute design and the other two guys
Yeah, as if it was done by a racist
Thank god British people aren’t real
You thought John Smith was bad. He wasn't lying about his looks. He. Wasn't. LYING.
😆
Well at least his teeth are snow white
@@oumassecondtalentistheulti2110 a rare feature in an brit
The way he just screams "'ELLO DARLIN'!" legit made me snort
ELLO DERE
I can't stop laughing just playing that back in my head lol omg
Pocahontas was looking really dissappointed, discomfortable, quite possibly even discombobulated by the single question "How old are you?"
gotta love when a horrifying history about an 11 year old innocent native girl who gets kidnapped and r-ped by a group of utter racist murderers gets turned into a silly childrens story and a disney film (pocahontas moment)
You just made me google Pocahontas and damn ,you basically ruined Pocahontas for me I thought this animation was a joke but damn
*a left the chat*
*- joined the chat*
Capitalism be like:
This is the real story of Pocahontas?
@@semyonsychev5906Religion be like:
Took me awhile to notice that the Englishmen were actually just animation.
Historically accurate indeed.
As a half Bri’ish guy, you win the comment section 😂😂😂
Wait, they’re animated?
1:29
The sheer terror on her face, Jesus. Also took me a while to realize why they didn't know what the Sun was, but that was probably the best joke in the video. Good job!
Yeah, I thought at first he was trying to communicate before the penny dropped.
The British travel to Spain to discover the sun.
Here's a fun fact that will humiliate any Brit.
My ancestors of Iberia were Romans. One of the legions that conquered most of Celtic Albion (Britain) was LEGIO IX HISPANA.
Therefore, I have told the proud Brits who look down on my people, that Iberians pissed on Albion before the Anglo-Saxons arrived to kiss where they pissed! :-)
A particular British lady if I can use the word loosely, remarked that I was being childish. So laughing is childish now. Pathetic Brits. No defense against that truth.
Glad that London is become Londonistan. They have undone the Reconquistas. Charles Martel would have their heads. Such fools liberals are, importing the enemy. At least the Muslims will execute the sodomites soon enough.
AY, DO YEU KNOW WEA THE TAJ MAHAL IS? *Cocks gun*
That part seems to get me every time.
ELLLO D A’ L I N
The vandalised graveyard that is John Ralph’s teeth really captures the distinct English beauty
i love how accurate it is that she clearly looks 12 and much like a 12 yr old is checking out a raccoon corpse
Good to see you not belittling and making us English look bad. Really does make me feel like you have done your best to accurately depict the people of our fine country.
ELLO ELLO GOV'NA
@@imwoofer4899 what makes this comment better is that it features a translate to English button under it
@@imwoofer4899 what language would you happen to be speaking?
For the people who have trouble recognizing sarcasm online, this is sarcasm.
>portrays white people as perpetually sun burnt hermits who can't stand being in the sun
>accurate representation
nah it's racist af
Innit chewsdays for fishnchips?
You can tell he's an authentic Englishman because he goes from normal to sunburn after about 30 seconds of unobstructed exposure to the sun
As a British person myself I can confirm if it was not for all the trees clouds and bad weather all of us would basically combust
As a englishman myself also, I can confirm this man here speaks the truth.
Lmao
So glad we don't have one of those accursed "sun" things bearing down on us all hours of the day; that would be terrible.
How do you guys get Vitamin D?
@@anulfolantigua940 white skin.
Are we just gonna Ignore the fact Pocahontas is adorable and he reactions are meme worthy I would watch episode of this lol!
I thought John looked bad but then that fucking monstrosity showed up
I died when he cocked the pistol.
I think unbuckling his belt would have been more... historically accurate....
Yeah, it's pretty common to die after the gun was cocked.
Probably not the only thing he cocked.
Were you a member of her tribe?
Percussion cap pistols wasn’t invented during the 17th century
Pocahontas got two lines and a bunch of facial expressions and still manages to be the most adorable thing on the channel
Jolly good!
1:00 "Im considered quite a handsome one at that" I believe him, just look at his friend.
"Thats where im from by the way, england"
*literally wears a spanish uniform*
I think it was also used by the english at some point
It was a popular armor design amongst explorers of the era.
When Smith asked about the sun, I first thought he was just playing stupid so he could keep the conversation going with her...but it's because of the weather in England of course.
0:33 *I’m sure glad we don’t have one of those in England.*
I never feared more for an animated character than for lil Pocahontas here.
@j.w.478👏... 👏
Especially when you realize that Pocahontas was brave enough to give birth to John Rolfe's son
@j.w.478 mane shut your corny ahh up
I sure hope these two gentlemen find the Taj Mahal.
My favorite part is I saw John Smith, and my first though was “his teeth are a little messed up, but they’re not nearly British enough”. And then John Rolf showed up and I said “Oh, there we go”
Interesting seeing Tom play himself in this one
Pocahontas was actually a nickname given to her by the tribe that meant "Naughty One". Her real name was Matoaka. Apparently her mother also had the nickname "Pocahontas" when she was alive.
like mother like daughter i guess...........
Based?
Shit don't fall from from the asshole i guess
Naughty in which manner
@@channinglogue8426 She was something like ten years old, so they _probably_ weren't just calling her a thot.
0:07 How the world sees the eldian people
Yes hahaha
John rolfe is the most horrifying thing I’ve ever seen
In all honesty, your Pocahontas design is so dang adorable!
Hey, John Ralph is adorable too
@@Neo2266. maybe even more
back off english man, and don't deport or burry Native americans and French babies in Canada ok
So continues the fetishization of Native American women.
Yep, this one right here officer.
As a native american I can confirm this is the oral story our elders still tell us of
*click*
If you have ever been on a reservation, the average native now looks more like john smith 😂
@@GB-ix1lk lost my virginity to a native girl, she was from a reservation. She wasn't smoking hot but she was pretty.
I can agree
@@someperson9999Hope WE soon Go to space so i can meet a pocahonta tau and can creat my owne horrific pedo crime WHO then gets Turn into a adorabel children movie
They made the English men so ACCURATE its like they actually took out their own teeth for the voice acting.
wtf
I've been to england, even the sun is scared of that place
God bless your soul for leaving in one piece
I'm fairly surprised that you have managed not to draw an another grotesque abomination but a pretty adorable girl. That's definitely not something that happens too often
They sort of cheated by just using photos of British MPs to represent the English characters, though. Lazy.
@@luxborealis and they owned it
I'm English and I can confirm that this 102% accurate with a 2% margin of error.
As a French, this is 100% how we see you Englishmen
Weird. I just picture Darjeeling, Orange Pekoe, Assam, Earl Grey, and Rosehip drinking tea while driving British tanks. As always Japan does entertainment best. The French team is quite funny as well. "Let them eat cake." A very fitting statement for all of us tax serfs around the world regardless of where we live.
Josie delivered her line perfectly.
Josie discovered by Sam and Jet circa 2023.
Remember kids,
She was "not forcefully" married and worked on Rolfs tobacco farm after totally converting to Christianity and having his children and died in England being the first American to die in England and totally didn't die from disease or poisoning.
And she wasnt 11 when she got kid.... I mean, willfully taken to England
she was 100% kidnapped bud.
0:20 Poor Cute Pocahontas. She is scared.
Wrong time stamp.
She was more confused.
I'm surprised you didn't show him kidnapping Pocahontas, forcing her to convert, marry him, and show her dying painfully of smallpox in England.
Ah yes, they called that "happily ever after" back in the day
Didn’t need to, bri’ ish people are enough
I read the real history of the island of the blue dolphins girl and it sucked. Nobody could understand her, then she got sick and died.
@@biggusdickus2166 “Nobody could understand her, then she got sick and died.”
The majority of interactions between indigenous people and European settlers in a nutshell.
@@purpleemerald5299 This comment.. the majority of virtue signaling
This is giving Meat Canyon vibes but still has your guys’s distinct style which is great
Just need that deep voice that we love so much
"Looking like a double wide surprise."
Meat Canyons but with adorable girls and UFBs
cursed
They do collaborate frequently so yeah it makes sense
*"ELLO DAHRLIN"*
- Handsome englishman
I love how up until the end,the Englishmen were relatively nice despite their misunderstandings.
Fun fact: Construction on the Taj Mahal didn’t begin until 15 years after Pocahontas’s death.
Another Fun Fact: The British did not start calling it India until after they conquered all of it over a hundred years after Columbus. At this point everything from Pakistan to Indonesia would be referred to as the Indies.
No wonder she didn't know where it was!
After how that last episode ended, I’m just surprised that you guys didn’t show her getting kidnapped and forced to marry an Englishman.
🎶Push it to the limit🎶
Didn't she choose to go to England, and was only kidnapped to ransom captures settlers and supplies from the natives?
@@pepperedash4424 are you on drugs? Why would she leave her family for a guy who kills her people for sports?
@@youtubestudiosucks978 John Ralph didn't kill her people for sport. Read a history book, and stop regurgitating revisionist, sensationalized historical events as facts.
@@pepperedash4424 history is whritten by the winners, nobody is going to paint themselves in a negative light
John looks like Hoggle from the Labyrinth after the puppet was left in a suit case for 10 years
A native of South Eastern Virginia, I whole heartedly approve this of this rendition of the first English colony.
Church Norris was in Virginia once. Now it's called just "Ia."
1:17 honestly just keep coming back just to hear "ELLO ELLO" lmaoooo
Oh god, john's appearance is kinda monsterous. 😰
I’d be terrified if this were me.
Yes? Well... then you'll be glad to know that the real Pocahontas got married to the second guy and brought to England.
:(
Ello ello!
Thank you for representing the British "people" well by choosing the finest gentlemen to be starred.
The Englishmen have such a way with words, they sound so majestic and elegant.
ELLO DARLIN!!!
WELLL A' LEAST
Personality matters
Can I say, in the least creepy/sexual/pedophiliac/any negative adjective way possible, that Pocahontas herself looks freaking adorable?
Exactly
Just... take her away from the colonists. If only.
Oid sey, Jonathan Smith saw'er pretty, yeah?
natives in general are beautiful but doesn't compare to how handsome British chaps are
@@yeahimethan5968 You must not be looking at the same natives I'm looking at.
You should not sympathize with Pocahontas, she is a Communist.
Did anyone else think it was sis when he asked how old she was and the immediately followed up with if they invented laws yet?
Yeah that's cause in irl John Smith r-ped Pocahontas when she was way underaged
@@chaoticbliss4169
John Smith never raped Pocahontas. For starters, he wasn't even in Virginia when she was taken hostage due to him being sent back to England in 1609 after being injured in a gunpowder accident, 4 years before Pocahontas was held.
John Smith may have been a lot of things, but a creep wasn't one of them.
"Sun, interesting, sure glad we don't have one of those in England"
Never expected this channel to be that educational. Well done, chaps!
History sure is great. Isn’t it
1:04 STRANGER DANGER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
That’s just every English person
Salad fingers must be the most Handsome man in England if people like John Rolfe are there 💀
Aww no they legit made Pocahontas look cute
Before going to America John Smith worked as a mercenary and fought through all of Europe from Spain all the way to Wallachia (Romania). Mercenary, knight, prince, slave, explorer, slave trader - this guy experienced everything.
What a life
The balls
And had a huge hobby for one on one duels. Especially in Romania!
Man, I wish I was like that. So badass...
Didn't it come out that Smith falsified half of that? Historical records written by nobles who knew him said he was known to brag and lie a lot. He wasn't popular with the women, an incel pretty much. Disney's adaption of Pocahontas was written by Smith.
Edit: I didn't see the "prince" part. Lol I didn't realize you were making a history joke.
I misread slave trader and thought you meant the man was a slave not once but twice lol 😂
Historically accurate Robin Hood next! Added bonus of making fun of furries
This is a great idea. I cant wait for Disneys live action Robin Hood
😂👍
@@TailsFetish with the current culture fighting them right now I don't think they have the money to start pushing furry bait they already kind of pissed the furry community with gadget and that fly hooking up that was funny they did this the despite you people.
I just remembered that video cgp grey. Where some Scottish monk described Robin Hood as some disgusting man and his fellowers dumb
For me, I'm just waiting for Martha Speaks skit.
: )
This Pocahontas looks cuter than the original
That hairline on that noggin 1:36
As an Englishman I love seeing myself represented in quality animation such as this. Keep up the glorious work!
@Tyler Kudo I mean the yanks screwed over literally everyone while the British were willing to bankrupt themselves preventing a single empire from dominating Europe, but yeah don't trust the Brits. They like... Released India as an independent nation and stuff.
@Tyler Kudo Fair point with the Boer camps.
The transatlantic slave trade was neither started by Britain or the only transcontinental slave trade at the time. But Britain did end it, deploying an entire fleet with the expressed purpose of hunting slave ships, forcing African monarchs to abandon the practice, and taking on loans to free slaves that wouldn't be paid off until 2015. Literally hundreds of years spent combatting slavery.
Yeah, Britain caused a famine in India. It had nothing to do with merchants screwing over people they regarded as foreign heathens, nothing to do with the countries India would normally buy food from in times of shortage being invaded/conquered by Japan, and certainly nothing to do with the British government seeing Hitler as more of a priority. Britain just felt like causing a famine.
Ask a single native tribe if Americans ever kept their word. If one single agreement was honoured beyond "You're gonna stay on this reservation in a state of economic stasis."
@Tyler Kudo Your comment just leaves me bewildered. The Caribbean colonies? So Jamaica, Barbados, Leeward islands, and the Bahamas? You think they were vying for a monopoly against a literal empire with a fleet bigger than the two largest rivals combined? For what exactly? "A monopoly on the slave trade to England"? What slave trade? Slavery had been banned in England in the early 1700's, and they were more than capable of buying them straight from Africa. They weren't setting up plantations in Sussex. I just don't understand your comment.
Also Britain was on the whole reliable when dealing with the natives. It was only after both the empire and France lost their north American territory that the natives in America found themselves not bordering two empires vying for their support against each other, but a single empire looking to expand.
Not counting Canada of course because running it was a feat in itself, let alone sending troops through it.
he asks her how old she is.
He mentions he's considered pretty in his parts.
Asks her if laws exist to check if she is technically _legal_
wow...
If it makes you feel better she married him at 16.... which is a lot better then other younger child brides at oh, I don't know 6-9 years old?
@@Azraelseraphim after getting kidnapped yeah that totally makes it better
@naka Welp time for me to start a fake version of Christianity and have twenty 16 year old brides. I will take your finest in God's name, Amen.
@@Azraelseraphim too late, Mormons caved
@@Azraelseraphim If your talking about Muhammed and Aisha that was so normal they did even care, it was 1400 years ago lol what do you expect. Also you would be surprised by how common 16 year laws are or how many loopholes exist even if its 18.
This Pocahontas is very cute and what a gentleman is John, a truly Englishman.
Knowing flashgitz I already knew the British would be like this but it's weird to see how adorable Pocahontas is drawn