How to Show Him You LIKE Him Without SCARING Him Away (Formula)

แชร์
ฝัง
  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 22 ธ.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น •

  • @cloudyday1617
    @cloudyday1617 3 ปีที่แล้ว +595

    My late mother used to tell me, " Don't tell him everything."
    Yes, that's right.

    • @P0rtugueseRedM00n
      @P0rtugueseRedM00n 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      In fact i think its good to say everything, especially if its horny stuff, he will love you 🤣🤣🤣

    • @wshelby83
      @wshelby83 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      So what do you tell him or when do you tell him things? I hope you answer

    • @heyheyhey6730
      @heyheyhey6730 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@wshelby83 when he ask

    • @KmNry
      @KmNry ปีที่แล้ว

      And mine!

  • @Emmagicalife
    @Emmagicalife 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1767

    I personally think it's important to just be our true authentic selves, and if that scares the man away then they were not right for us to begin with, so we just simply accept that and move on. If the man was truly interested and saw your true value underneath your insecurities, he would not care if your emotions over flow out of you at times when you cannot control them because there is just so much emotion embodied within you - that's life, we have so much emotion inside ourselves each and everyone of us. I don't understand why we all have to run away from that and be afraid of showing our insecurities and vulnerabilities. If you scare the other person away because of that, they are really afraid of that what's inside themselves and your were simply a reflection of that. Knowing and acknowledging this is true strength in my perceptive, not hiding away from it.

    • @Emmagicalife
      @Emmagicalife 6 ปีที่แล้ว +115

      Yes I am AFRAID, yes I am HURT, because my heart had been bruised and broken a thousand times into a million pieces. My heart has ENDURED immense and incredible pain that when I open up to you, these emotions may show, and they may be revealed to you, if you cannot accept that as a part of who I am, then you are not the one for me. I will respect that and I will accept that and I will move on.
      I will not play these silly games, I will be real, I will be raw, i will be my true authentic self and I will not be afraid or ashamed of who I am.

    • @SarahnatorFrazee
      @SarahnatorFrazee 6 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      Thank you. I was thinking this and you worded it perfectly.

    • @SarahnatorFrazee
      @SarahnatorFrazee 6 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      To be anything else other than yourself is short changing yourself and cheating the world out of what you were meant to bring to it.

    • @Banana-lk7tf
      @Banana-lk7tf 6 ปีที่แล้ว +68

      Exactly! With all due respect to this man, the games (challenges) he's suggesting are complete BS. A secure man can handle a woman who's open.

    • @Banana-lk7tf
      @Banana-lk7tf 6 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@Emmagicalife Preach!!!👏👏👏👏👏

  • @Heirphoria13
    @Heirphoria13 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1022

    I didnt meet my husband til I was 32. I dated A LOT. So by the time I met him I really didnt care anymore. I had lived alone for 10 years by that time and I enjoyed it. Him ,being an alpha Male , liked the chase. We dated 2 months, eloped and have been happily married for 24 years now.

    • @joycevanlaar4787
      @joycevanlaar4787 5 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      Love this! It gives me hope🤭🤭😊

    • @aprilreeves3654
      @aprilreeves3654 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      Congratulations! I love how you did your thing for 12 years got to check out the dating scene,and now your Married to who I believe sounds like ur soulmate😁😉

    • @eveheart2876
      @eveheart2876 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Rather B Hunter than Prey that’s cool. 😂 the struggle is real. U just blessed

    • @sfoster4874
      @sfoster4874 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      And that's the way it's done! Congratulations : ) Most of just wish it would happen a lot faster than 10 years. Thanks for the great share : )

    • @MeeMee-fd6lm
      @MeeMee-fd6lm 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      I like this, no fuss. Is when you not anxious and looking it, is when true love steps in. God bless your marriage my dear.....

  • @heyheyhey6730
    @heyheyhey6730 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2111

    Stay single, I’m tired of this drama

    • @rosag7386
      @rosag7386 4 ปีที่แล้ว +56

      Agree . I came to this conclusion

    • @sammiechua5674
      @sammiechua5674 4 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      Hahahahaha

    • @xhindivant5853
      @xhindivant5853 4 ปีที่แล้ว +44

      I get you. It is so hard to keep his attention, like we have to make a lot of work.

    • @denisesiddon7241
      @denisesiddon7241 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Agree at my most relaxed rn. Not spoiling that for anyone

    • @MeeMee-fd6lm
      @MeeMee-fd6lm 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Lol

  • @kateiwudike4456
    @kateiwudike4456 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2078

    Why does it have to be so damn complicated?

    • @lilia9728
      @lilia9728 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Kate iwudike Ikr

    • @reginawest7852
      @reginawest7852 6 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      IKR!?! Annoying as all get out.

    • @williameyelash8053
      @williameyelash8053 6 ปีที่แล้ว +68

      Acting like somebody else makes me frustrated !! 😉

    • @mahelenabraga
      @mahelenabraga 6 ปีที่แล้ว +37

      Because men are fearful

    • @angeloddrev
      @angeloddrev 6 ปีที่แล้ว +147

      It's not! He's neglecting to say if you're around a guy like this, *get out!!* He's NOT the right guy. A relationship should be easy, from start to finish. If it's the right guy, you won't be judged on anything you say, or when you say it or how you say it. You can be like Colleen Ballinger on yt and fart and burp your boots off and your guy would still look at you adoringly XD Dump these namby pampy guys, and get yourself a guy who's sweet and genuine, trust me they are out there. The rest, bin 'em. and fast. NO games. That's the only rule you need. Goes with friends, too. Unconditional love, or nothing. Don't settle.

  • @stephaniewashere9821
    @stephaniewashere9821 6 ปีที่แล้ว +698

    Dating these days is quite scripted...perfect words, perfect timing, perfect place and maybe even perfect people. This is a shame for innocent people who are just looking to bond with the opposite sex. Dating has really changed for the worst it seems.

    • @jazminavendano5205
      @jazminavendano5205 6 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      Specially for women

    • @zakosist
      @zakosist 6 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Its scripted because people are looking for solutions when things don't work out or just have fear of messing up, and there probably is something too it, if its a good advice it works best majority of the time. But I think nothing will work in every case, and sometimes breaking the "rules" is actually right. It depends a lot on both how they are and how you are as a person

    • @LoralLee
      @LoralLee 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @TH-cam Veterinarian It's not clear to me what feminism has to do with this format for dating.

    • @tima1443
      @tima1443 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      The thing now, is that we have the ability to communicate much much easier either by text , email, call. We just pick up the phone & tell him/her whats in our mind. Back then, although we wanted to do that, no phones were available so we had no choice but to wait until we got to see them. Hence as well, not exposing everything by text either. So something to think about too

    • @menacinelli5781
      @menacinelli5781 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @TH-cam Veterinarian What does feminism have anything to do with this video?

  • @emily_rose_elyse
    @emily_rose_elyse 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2135

    These kinds of videos give me severe anxiety....was just being yourself ever a thing?

    • @malusha6438
      @malusha6438 6 ปีที่แล้ว +101

      Was about to say the same...I'm feeling anxious watching this type video...it's not gona b myself if start saying n behaving as in the video...

    • @putriindahsuari9445
      @putriindahsuari9445 6 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      It's like saying isn't the earth flat cause I see it like that..

    • @angellinegirl
      @angellinegirl 5 ปีที่แล้ว +113

      Be yourself and love yourself as you truly are. Why would you want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with you as you truly are? I believe that if you hold out and focus on loving yourself as you are instead of keep wanting to bend yourself backwards to please anyone else by not being yourself, the right person that will love you truly and deeply as you are, will come into your life.

    • @greta3578
      @greta3578 5 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      @@malusha6438 this is where i think: god! I've fucked up everything !!!

    • @asmanidaulhaq8601
      @asmanidaulhaq8601 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      I know right, my whole life I've been watching/reading this kind of stuff. Now I'm 22 and still single 😅

  • @Indonesia_wales
    @Indonesia_wales 3 ปีที่แล้ว +145

    There is no too soon or too late .. it’s just about the right time with the right person.
    Time doesn’t deliver clarity but depth delivers clarity. You Can’t say the wrong thing to the right person (say or ask anything you would like to say to the person you are attracted to, whatever you need to express, desire questions, deep questions you want to ask/say, if this is the wrong person, they won’t be last, if the right person, they will come toward you)
    BE your true self from the beginning is the key. No one can pretend longer than 3 months, after the 3/4 month people will actually reveal their true colours and initials intentions.

    • @michellemcmillinsantinni1213
      @michellemcmillinsantinni1213 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I agree!❤

    • @ChileYo
      @ChileYo ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Absolutely agree, don’t be scared of being rejected, live your life .. not wait some unreal safe conditions.

  • @zsofiasimo4862
    @zsofiasimo4862 6 ปีที่แล้ว +551

    I was born tired of manipulation :-)

    • @farfetched9296
      @farfetched9296 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      You have to manipulate a guy to love you...basically...

    • @maryelizabeth2788
      @maryelizabeth2788 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Ugh me too

  • @SundayCookingRemix
    @SundayCookingRemix 5 ปีที่แล้ว +48

    Ladies be yourself. If he cant deal show him the door. The realest thing i wrote to date

  • @amandac8836
    @amandac8836 5 ปีที่แล้ว +289

    Me: *has interest in dating again*
    Me: *watches this* "Yeahhhh nah think I'll live alone forever lol I cbf".

  • @kathyrcorbin
    @kathyrcorbin 6 ปีที่แล้ว +774

    I don’t agree, I’ve done this with all my passed relationships and found that if a guy likes you this won’t matter.

    • @1tecito
      @1tecito 6 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      Yeah but no one likes me so I needed this help

    • @ineverythingigivethanks
      @ineverythingigivethanks 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      True

    • @Banana-lk7tf
      @Banana-lk7tf 6 ปีที่แล้ว +91

      @@1tecito only an insecure man wants a woman who plays games. If he's only interested because you seem hard to get, he'll lose interest once he has you, trust me.

    • @NarnianLady
      @NarnianLady 5 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      @@lizzymac1356 So true. We women don't judge, we have grace and compassion... A man who shows his emotions openly is a darling and no woman in their right mind would mistreat him for that.

    • @barbilove1698
      @barbilove1698 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Past

  • @KarineTKnudsen
    @KarineTKnudsen 2 ปีที่แล้ว +42

    I agree with Emmagination's comment.
    You don’t need to play games to get the love you want. You were made to be lovable exactly as you are. When we find ourselves caught up in the dating “game” our wound has taken over. The wound tells us we need to use tactics to get someone to like us, see us, love us. Operating from a wounded place will never give you the love you desire. The only path to receiving the love your heart craves is to be authentically you.

  • @julianaventura874
    @julianaventura874 5 ปีที่แล้ว +150

    Why we can not just be ourselves without worrying so much?

    • @emmalee79
      @emmalee79 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      No shit

  • @nins7457
    @nins7457 5 ปีที่แล้ว +52

    Be yourself. It’s exhausting when u lie to yourself and others. Period.

  • @katherenewedic8076
    @katherenewedic8076 6 ปีที่แล้ว +231

    God forbid people should be genuine and human. As humans we ARE dependant on one another. Divorice rates are high because of immaturity and manipulative games.

    • @calamitychaela1994
      @calamitychaela1994 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Daily Bible study with your partner reduced divorce by about 95 percent.

  • @symplypeechie6496
    @symplypeechie6496 6 ปีที่แล้ว +570

    I'm trying to get back out in the dating scene after 20+yrs of marriage and its hard. All these rules and mind games. I think I'll just stay home and get some cats. Seems easier than this dating merry go round.

    • @lexiemaep7930
      @lexiemaep7930 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Cherity Rebancos me too! I was married 17 yrs. Try Tinder. I have met so many nice men.

    • @rachelwilliams9686
      @rachelwilliams9686 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Good luck. 🙂 Hopefully you can find someone who loves you for you, and vice versa. No games, no bs. It's tough. It's important to find someone that makes you want to be a "better you", but not force you to change something that's already awesome about you. If you can't be yourself around your partner, it's not worth your time.

    • @OlgaRykov
      @OlgaRykov 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Don't date, the right man reveals his admirable and loyal qualities before you get mired into a whirlwind of dating. The right man for you will share your negative sentiment about dating. He will want to be together, happy and forever as soon as possible, because he would know that he wants you and only you.

    • @angellinegirl
      @angellinegirl 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      I am so with you on that haha! I was married for 13 years and I am happier doing things I love instead of going dating :-)

    • @laurie329808
      @laurie329808 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      For those that think that Mr. (or Ms. Right) isn't out there... don't give up hope, however DO give up ACTIVELY looking for & pursuing a relationship.
      I know it might seem counterintuitive for me to say that, but it worked for me.
      While I'm not the most religious person in the world, I found that as soon as I essentially "let it go & let God handle it" then (and only then) did my "wish" come true.
      I had had a psychic dream (if you will) in 2010 (didn't meet my current boyfriend & future fiancé until late 2014) but when met him on Facebook, I knew instantly that it WAS him, as I came across a pic of him (taken at his eldest sister's wedding in 2011) and from then I knew that he was the one that I'm destined to marry. 😊

  • @MsKizationify
    @MsKizationify 6 ปีที่แล้ว +83

    If a guy is right and meant for you, then no matter what you do, will scare him off :)

  • @NightRaven2011
    @NightRaven2011 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    ..”If you want him to treat you like a queen then you have to act like one from the start” 👏🏼👌🏼👑

  • @IndigoMoonFrequentzy
    @IndigoMoonFrequentzy 6 ปีที่แล้ว +145

    Your quote: "Neediness kills attraction. We cannot keep being attracted to a needy person. It's physically impossible. It kills the hormones of love." Okay, so this is in a case of a casual relationship where there is no emotional investment, but just based off of surface qualities. This advice is dangerous because a healthy, emotionally invested relationship is one where the two need each other, not in a healthy or co-dependent way, but in a vulnerable and healthy way. And you're basically feeding into the myth that needing someone or being vulnerable is a weakness, which is a patriarchal concept. Also, in a genuine and healthy relationship, a person doesn't "lose love" or interest if their partner is having moments of weakness or neediness. They accept each other for who they are and both try to uplift each other. This is unhealthy advice you're giving, and just to immature, insecure men. I agree that in beginning, there is a dance with not throwing yourself at someone, which can scare someone off. And a lot of guys like direct compliments, btw.

    • @itsmesia2469
      @itsmesia2469 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Agree ..!!

    • @Yikkoofficial
      @Yikkoofficial 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Exactly. Exactly . Exactly.

    • @moubhattacharyay6891
      @moubhattacharyay6891 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I Appreciate Ur Comment That It's A Fact Of Truth For Engaging In A Relationship...
      Not The Supporter Of Delusional Nonsense Thoughts & Constant Chaos Of Now-A-Days Fake Preachers/Show Called Motivational Statements Abt Love & Relationships Where's Not There Any Deep Down Existences Beneath The Surfaces...😏
      Coz,The Ultimate TRUE Relationships Are Established By The Feelings,Emotions & Passions Of The Heart..
      IT'S NOT ABOUT THE GAME OF THRONE/MIND!😊

    • @EchelonPandora
      @EchelonPandora ปีที่แล้ว

      He is Dutch they are often assholes

  • @heritage.home.crochet
    @heritage.home.crochet 6 ปีที่แล้ว +402

    His voice is so calming. It makes me want to close my eyes.

    • @dianaeastwood7838
      @dianaeastwood7838 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I totally agree!

    • @symplypeechie6496
      @symplypeechie6496 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      lhenle55 I wonder where he's from. His accent helps to closely listen to him as to not miss what he's saying.

    • @purpleducky6955
      @purpleducky6955 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      I actually did a couple times

    • @ClaudinneV
      @ClaudinneV 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yeah, his accent sounds beautiful! ..In one of his podcasts he said that he born in Brussels, Belgium- His native language may be Flemish or German?

    • @valerierobertson1611
      @valerierobertson1611 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Cherity Rebancos Scotland

  • @widyantogunadi9593
    @widyantogunadi9593 5 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    Life itself is already full of challenges. You don't need to make relationships sound even more complex with those "hints of challenges" when in reality it's not all that complicated. Simply be yourself genuinely and positively. Never try to be a fake and manipulative person or someone that you're not. Good men will be there for kindhearted, generous, and supportive women regardless of their looks and appearances. You have to remember that good character is much more important than only your outer physical makeup. It is all there is to it. I am happy that I had found one such woman with a strong, morally sound character, married her for years, and been blessed with our beautiful little daughter.

  • @JoannaCubana
    @JoannaCubana 6 ปีที่แล้ว +514

    I really need to hear this. I am the type to say "the wrong things"... too fast too soon. It's fear based sometimes, or from low self-esteem. But I am working on myself. THANK YOU!!!💜

    • @Honeymagmangospoof
      @Honeymagmangospoof 6 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Joanna Gipson I’m the same and I think that’s why I’m single for so long

    • @missylewis7210
      @missylewis7210 6 ปีที่แล้ว +61

      If you're saying 'the wrong things' you're viewing people as potential relationships who are clearly not. The right guy won't give a rip what you say or do, he'll just find u adorable.

    • @JaneDoe-jm2kr
      @JaneDoe-jm2kr 6 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Guess they're just lost for words because you are so beautiful 😊

    • @twincherry4958
      @twincherry4958 6 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Always have options...say what you want; you'd be leading the way. If he's not where you are, it's bad timing...one of the others may be ;)

    • @churrinaapolina4270
      @churrinaapolina4270 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Same here🙈

  • @minigol91
    @minigol91 6 ปีที่แล้ว +935

    I wanted to write a nice comment but I don’t want u to get a crush on me 😊

  • @aimforparadise9269
    @aimforparadise9269 5 ปีที่แล้ว +131

    This is kind of depressing.

  • @athena_the_hun1097
    @athena_the_hun1097 5 ปีที่แล้ว +105

    If you want your guy to treat you like a Queen, you have to act like one from the start.
    That’s brilliant! 😊

    • @kimberlyclark6326
      @kimberlyclark6326 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Yes....and, in my opinion, a Queen would never dress herself as a hooker, which I find many women, today, like to do. The low-cut top is a staple; to me, it's a cheap shot. If a Girl/Woman has to offer up her sexuality to the public, I think, if I were a Guy, I'd find her to be quite insecure.

    • @brunamusetti
      @brunamusetti 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Been acting like a Queen for five years, It didn't worked... Like a real Queen, dressing good, speaking correctly, never screaming or showing to much emotions, being respectful, smart, funny and well behaved even the pace of walking I adjusted to be more polite... Never worked 🤷🏼‍♀️

    • @Eevanova
      @Eevanova 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@brunamusetti don't be polite too much
      Be polite sometimes

  • @JuiceyJuice611
    @JuiceyJuice611 6 ปีที่แล้ว +127

    Unfortunately after listening to you I can't focus or listen to other speakers.. You are sooo straight forward, you don't share uninteresting or tedious information. You get straight to the point. You are so easy to comprehend and digest... I simply learn from you and you really capture my attention from the beginning to the end. I thank you for the knowledge. Now I can do something different because I trust what you are saying. Thank you!!!!

    • @JuiceyJuice611
      @JuiceyJuice611 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      kellycrazie LOLOL 😊

    • @caroh2809
      @caroh2809 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      kellycrazie hahaha that was exactly what I was thinking. Urghhh it drives me crazy - I hate playing games and if I want to pay a compliment I want to do that not sit around worrying if that makes me too easy. Jeez it’s complicated...

    • @cdoctor35
      @cdoctor35 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Yvonne Reed
      he is professional

    • @JuiceyJuice611
      @JuiceyJuice611 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      susan main yesss he is very professional!!!!

    • @moonkoral1009
      @moonkoral1009 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      There are so many other youtubers who have been saying the exact same thing

  • @LoveConan96
    @LoveConan96 5 ปีที่แล้ว +61

    This is so complicated
    I surrender and try to get used to being single forever instead

  • @Michelle-x5l
    @Michelle-x5l 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    - I wouldn't want you to get a crush on me :)
    - That's the kind of jacket that can look really sexy if a guy goes to the gym!
    - Avoid telling him direct compliments at the beginning because they do better with a challenge, an indirect comment where they're not sure if you like them or not, but it gives them a direction of where to impress you.. some confusion which makes them think about you longer.
    Very funny. Sneaky. It's like dropping a hanky ! I think I'll get one of your books. As always great videos!

  • @dimanakardzhieva6868
    @dimanakardzhieva6868 6 ปีที่แล้ว +461

    I am sorry, I love your intelligent and empathetic style, your concern for women, but... I think the advice in this particular video is very unhealthy. Giving someone a genuine compliment, even off the bat, is not neediness. Needing to be coy is not being a high-value woman - it is in many ways the opposite of the self-aware, confident and honest approach that you have advised in your other videos. I'm sorry if it's just my opinion, but if a man needs me to be this coy to get his attention, and can't appreciate me without having to fight for me, then I probably don't want him in my life. If a man can't accept love freely given, it is a problem of his own self-esteem, not the woman's.

    • @jimgoodwin7925
      @jimgoodwin7925 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Dimana Kardzhieva bbt

    • @Banana-lk7tf
      @Banana-lk7tf 6 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      Exactly! It's major insecurity on his part.

    • @MsMesem
      @MsMesem 5 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      @@Banana-lk7tf Yes, when you are kind and caring and want to give and only get a negative response, they have the problem, not you.

    • @georgialee6755
      @georgialee6755 5 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      Halcyon Most men do not want compliements so soon - like it or not. You need to let the man give more to you - at least in the first few months. It’s ok to compliment here or there but don’t go overboard and let him start the complimenting first. That’s just the way it is with most men.

    • @MsMesem
      @MsMesem 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@georgialee6755 Most. One at the moment needs and loves them, insecure.

  • @LadyLuvsYou
    @LadyLuvsYou 6 ปีที่แล้ว +131

    WOW... so exploring the dark side is not an option. When people can love through someone's wounds, and when healing occurs - that sense of neediness is held in a special way. Abandoning someone who shows vulnerability is evil. We are all vulnerable at some point. Guys who need a woman who has it all together 24/7 aren't really able to connect to that vulnerability. It scares them.

    • @juliab.75
      @juliab.75 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Very smart and true

    • @adriennea.2460
      @adriennea.2460 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      TRUE THAT WOMAN!!!! LOUDER!!

    • @brunamusetti
      @brunamusetti 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Say it louder for the people in the back!! You right, no one is ever 100% fine and this idealistic idea that we have to be fine to have a relationship is non sense because everyone has a story or has been broken before... what we need to is find someone who acknowledge what you been through, respects it and makes sure you will not go through that again and that is for one another, we build relationships together and not with only one person of the couple so we must be there for each other as a couple

  • @Zwhg7
    @Zwhg7 6 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    as an independent woman i struggle so much with what you say..

  • @TheDawningEclipse
    @TheDawningEclipse 6 ปีที่แล้ว +203

    I thought guys were supposed to be the simple creature 🙄

    • @25sigmaa
      @25sigmaa 5 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      If I had a $100 for every time a guy said, "I'm just a simple guy." 🙄

    • @juliab.75
      @juliab.75 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Hon who ever made you believe that? Haha

    • @thedeedee
      @thedeedee 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Right! Lol they are not !

    • @asmip5125
      @asmip5125 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      SADLY they r not..

    • @gloriakuhn8670
      @gloriakuhn8670 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      They are simple as in stupid af if they think someone is being needy and clingy for these things.

  • @elizabeththankfulshannon7455
    @elizabeththankfulshannon7455 6 ปีที่แล้ว +67

    And another thing, why is it that if men and women think so differently, women have to change their ways in order to "snag" their man? Why doesn't the man make more of an effort to morph his way of thinking to better suit the woman's needs? Look at every other species. The males go to great efforts to win their woman. (Just watch the bird of paradise's mating dance, or that of the peacock spider.) Human men are so lazy. There should really be more videos on how men should behave toward women, and not the other way around. Chivalry is endearing. Expecting a women to completely change who she is in order to appease your way of thinking, is just selfish. Who wants to be with a man who's selfish? And who wants to be with a man who doesn't love you exactly as you are?

    • @ninathethird
      @ninathethird 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      I mean, there are plenty of videos about pick up artists. But it has more to do with getting laid...

  • @Amysbiblereads
    @Amysbiblereads 5 ปีที่แล้ว +55

    I am binge watching your videos and reading your books! My last relationship I was too needy. He wasn't interested so I over compensated to make him love me back. He ended up cheating on me multiple times. THAT is not my fault though! But what I've learnt is being needy doesn't work. I am now being independent and loving myself for who I am! 🥰

    • @jessiejohnson1208
      @jessiejohnson1208 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Exactly, I've been there too

  • @kittyscorner24
    @kittyscorner24 6 ปีที่แล้ว +359

    Very sexist. A guy who you can't be yourself with is a turn off. Boring guy. Dump him. Walk away. He's not worth the games.

    • @staceykersting705
      @staceykersting705 6 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      We all like someone a little sassy, and it's exciting to have a bit of mystery. Aren't u wary of GUYS if the rush in too fast? It's scary. Remember the old adage, "How can I miss u when u won't go away?".

    • @OlgaRykov
      @OlgaRykov 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@staceykersting705 Tons of dull old adages out there. Not everything that is old and repeated is wise. Everybody can go away any day, cherish them. And if you don't - why are you even wasting their and your time? If one doesn't see and get excited about the long-term prospects, mutual growth and creativity with a partner and has to resort to the immediate reward of mystery - one hasn't matured enough to be in a relationship that goes past holding hands.

    • @staceykersting705
      @staceykersting705 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@OlgaRykov My love life's not a spread sheet..not all calculated in advance. I was with my late partner 20 yrs n things were always new, fresh n we never stopped learning things about each other. He was my muse. U hate old adages, I guess, but this one hits the mark...come back FRESH!

    • @echadmiyodea
      @echadmiyodea 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I have to agree.

    • @RedAndTheCompany567
      @RedAndTheCompany567 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      This coming from another woman? Ok.....invalid. Women should never take another woman's advice on men. Never. I learned that the hard way. They need to seek advice from other men.

  • @cozamos
    @cozamos 6 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    Are you kidding? If a woman has to MAKE a man fall in love with her, it’s already a ‘no win’.

    • @chamcham123
      @chamcham123 16 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Men are often oblivious to the signs from women.

  • @shieldmaidensvarden5229
    @shieldmaidensvarden5229 6 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    Your channel with that theme is the best I've seen. You also don't push too much commercial. It's great. Straight to the point...

  • @_Colie
    @_Colie 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    When I saw "formula" in the title, I thought "Ooooh, formula! Because they're babies!" lmaooo

  • @ashbinaynteen7168
    @ashbinaynteen7168 4 ปีที่แล้ว +36

    You're absolutely right!
    "...being feminine."
    "Men should do the chasing."
    "... natural laws of attraction... "

    • @crystalearth33
      @crystalearth33 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Right and then they are afraid and emotionally immature and have very little communication skills

  • @travel_therapy_mskimlpc
    @travel_therapy_mskimlpc 6 ปีที่แล้ว +137

    I can probably see another reason why I'm still single. This is just too much and too Complicated. So how do we relate this too people whom met, got engaged and marriage all within a year or just a few months ? I feel like there is just too many factors to the game. Maybe Singleness is the best way.

    • @NarnianLady
      @NarnianLady 6 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Indeed. People of my parents' generation knew how to fall in love and get committed... It was normal and natural. These days, all these rules and games, so tiring.

    • @rachelwilliams9686
      @rachelwilliams9686 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Most of the couples I've known who jumped into marriage very quickly, weren't very happy. A lot of them stayed together for the long haul, but they (or at least one of them) would kind of say things that sound like regret. Even if they don't come right out and say it, you get the idea that they aren't happy. They've just "stuck it out for the kids" or something. But many years ago, divorce was still highly shameful. Plus, if you had kids, you had several, and couldn't support them alone. Now, it's more accepted to get divorced. People are more likely to find true happiness, even if you make a few mistakes first.

    • @NarnianLady
      @NarnianLady 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@rachelwilliams9686 Granted that not all marriages were happy. My parents have been together for 50+ years and they are very close and happy :)
      There aslo are couples who dated / courted for a long time, but that did not make their marriage a success... Each couple determines how long or short the get-to-know period needs to be, but a long engagement doesn't guarantee smooth sailing.

    • @rachelwilliams9686
      @rachelwilliams9686 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@NarnianLady very true. I just think a relationship is more likely to be satisfying if you've known each other for a while before getting married. That doesn't mean they all work out. Some relationships are good from the start and there is enough mutual interest to make it last. Some are bad, but you don't realize it for a while.

    • @tuneit3
      @tuneit3 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@NarnianLady the rules have not changed only today's players. The rules of human nature have always been the same

  • @moonaymc
    @moonaymc 6 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    I think the reason why dating is so complicated today is that we think and know to much. A few hundred years ago, this all would have probably happened naturally without any thinking about it. Now there's science, emancipation, ... This makes it too confusing. Maybe we should just let go of all the overthinking, work on our fears and flaws and connect naturally and see what happens.

  • @BigPicture717
    @BigPicture717 6 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    Hello? Guys can be needy too and yes that is a turn off.
    Either way neediness is a sign of insecurity that will continue to play out in other forms causing conflict within the relationship. The More Genuine advice would be to resolve the issues that created the insecurities etc..
    There is nothing authentic about acting and pretending

  • @lindaaltenburg2537
    @lindaaltenburg2537 5 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    I have come to realize, (in my 60’s) that I have been very, very fortunate in life. These things have always come to naturally to me. I still have men saying they love me from 15, 20 years ago. Every male ‘friend’ I’ve ever had has claimed to love me sooner or later, with no effort on my part

    • @Kristyle11
      @Kristyle11 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Yes, you are super blessed.

  • @kristine8338
    @kristine8338 5 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    Life is too short to hold back feelings of love. If They throw away the expression of love it is their loss. I enjoyed the time feeling this way and being able to express myself. Ever been in a therapy group Where adults got to learn to feel loved again? And Yes, Welcome to the world full of mistakes, it is a Wonderful one ⭐️🌸🤞🏻

  • @cynthiaskaggs6645
    @cynthiaskaggs6645 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Me trying to flirt: *winks with both eyes*

  • @nancysloan3731
    @nancysloan3731 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    If I can't just be myself and the man I like isn't interested enough in me for myself, then I would figure he isn't worth getting involved with. High self esteem is the key ladies when dealing with a man you are interested in.

  • @lillianlilo7447
    @lillianlilo7447 6 ปีที่แล้ว +122

    You only need to create false chemistry and attraction when it is not there in the first place. Then once the man gets what he wants (sex) he disappears on you. Then you have to watch his next video" What to do when he disappears on you"

    • @PriyankaGupta-ew1li
      @PriyankaGupta-ew1li 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Fark Que I'm weak😀😀😀😀😀

    • @annacyprisjaubert317
      @annacyprisjaubert317 6 ปีที่แล้ว +37

      I AGREE!!! This video should be called something like, this how to figure out if you are dating an emotional mature or immature guy. if he needs games and challenges, he is an emotional CHILD!!!!!! Do not waste your time. if he likes you, everyone can move on happily, without games and challenges.

    • @praiselove8471
      @praiselove8471 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Lol true

    • @reginawest7852
      @reginawest7852 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      😄😄😄

    • @erllteves2787
      @erllteves2787 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Fark Que

  • @annacyprisjaubert317
    @annacyprisjaubert317 6 ปีที่แล้ว +41

    !!!!!! NOT ALL GUYS NEED A F&#%KING CHALLENGE TO LIKE SOMEONE!!!! A woman should be able to express themselves and have it be understood. A challenge once feelings are out there and understood, just makes for a shallow relationship. I DO NOT like to be with guys like that. EVER.

    • @TheDawningEclipse
      @TheDawningEclipse 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Should...

    • @laries9648
      @laries9648 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I think we have to not care as much to have a successful relationship with a lot of men which is disheartening. On the flip side, I think this humbles us to actually give our absolute all and be able to detect when someone will continuously give their absolute all to us.

    • @yuppers1
      @yuppers1 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      You say that, but being straightforward kills the chemistry. I'm speaking from experience. This guy, and all moms, are right. Men are complicated.

  • @TALLhappyCOLORS
    @TALLhappyCOLORS 6 ปีที่แล้ว +90

    I really like all that you´re saying, although the indirect jacket muscle workout suggestion I find manipulative. I don´t want to have to say one thing, to affect something else and strategize. That´s not my nature. And I also don´t want the guy to use indirect manipulative language towards me in order to keep me guessing. That´s capturing thoughts and life force and manipulative. I feel it´s not good to invent artificial challenges, as life brings those naturally with sufficient opportunity to experience whether we´re sitting in the same boat or not ~

    • @kittymewmewziscute4459
      @kittymewmewziscute4459 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      TALLhappyCOLORS that's true because if you act all seductive and confident and you really aren't then he's falling in love with the wrong person and it would never be real love since he fell in love with that side of you and not the real side

    • @TALLhappyCOLORS
      @TALLhappyCOLORS 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      kitty mewmewziscute
      only if you´re into acting, and the partner is unable to see through it. As for me, I won´t fall in love with someone who is acting, because I see through it, and inauthenticity I find a major turn-off. Similarly, I wouldn´t fall in love with someone, who doesn´t see through the acting, but could be blinded. What do I want with someone like that?

    • @FruityHachi
      @FruityHachi 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      same, i hate manipulation and playing games, i can never figure out whether he genuinely likes me or he’s just playing and i eventually fall for him not knowing what he really feels
      i’d rather he just tell me straight-up
      so i too don’t think i’d play this guessing game either

    • @SuziTakumi
      @SuziTakumi 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      TALLhappyCOLORS seriously u said it... Just say the truth instead of talking shit... Or d guy could go to hell... Coz I don't understand humans

    • @IwasBlueb4
      @IwasBlueb4 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      i totally agree.....great advice, except for that jacket part....I found that insincere and even silly....

  • @Nora-ox3jn
    @Nora-ox3jn 6 ปีที่แล้ว +143

    LMBO! I learned , NEVER confess to the guy you like or have a crush on. LOL... maybe that's why it's called "crush" cause they sure crush the hell out of ya once you confess....LOL.. oh well, moving on.. :P

    • @mwadjumamukamfizi2216
      @mwadjumamukamfizi2216 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Nora yes I just run in that situation he was lik He can’t wait to see me seeing 3 times a week asking me out after I told him he is calm and a good listener he stopped the msg n everything I was I won’t text then after 4day he is back!!! Man are so complicated

    • @laurie329808
      @laurie329808 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Funny thing is, with regard to my current boyfriend (& soon to be fiancé) after we got together as a couple in August 2018 (we'd already been Facebook friends since January 2015), and I didn't confess to him (until after we got together as a couple) that I'd had a crush on him since I first met him (in a Facebook group that we're both still a part of).
      Interestingly enough, because of that he was quite surprised when I confessed to him that I've had a crush on him, as he told me that no other woman that he's ever been with has ever confessed to crushing on him.
      He & I are long distance, and we've both admitted to the fact that we continue to fall more & more in love with each passing day.
      My man is everything I could've ever possibly dreamed of. 😊

    • @laurie329808
      @laurie329808 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I will also say that this is the second time (in my life) that this has happened (as far as my secretly crushing on a guy), finally confessing to it (after a while) and then found out that the feelings were pretty mutual (considering the fact that my ex, who was also my high school crush) was the other guy it's happened with like that (for me).
      I'd had a crush on him all throughout high school (he's a year older than me) but all throughout our high school years, like in the case with my soon to be fiancé, I never let my high school crush know (until a few years after we'd both graduated high school) that I'd had a crush on him all throughout high school.
      Of course I felt like an ass for not confessing DURING our high school years, as it was because I didn't admit to anything, that I didn't go to my Junior prom. Had I admitted to it, and asked him to my Junior prom (it was his Senior Year) I could've gone to my Junior prom (& possibly his Senior prom) had we been a couple. As (when I finally confessed) and told him that I would've asked him to my Junior prom, he said he would've said "Yes". I tell you, I felt like a serious ASS knowing that (& that I could've gone to my Junior prom with him had I only confessed during high school). 🤣😂
      After I finally did confess though, we dated for 6 months (from February to August 2004) and despite my breaking off our romantic relationship, we are still on good terms (as friends). 😁

    • @halim001
      @halim001 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Nora I was planning on telling my crush but know I’m thinking against it thank you very much

    • @juliab.75
      @juliab.75 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Aww honey I feel and get you.. gosh well us women will find a way to triumph somehow!! 💪

  • @sweetsmiile32
    @sweetsmiile32 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I made the WORST mistake when I told him that I was always gonna be there for him. Seems like when you show interest (even when that interest is pure and true) they run away. And now I'm soo tired of situations like this. I'm tired of this game where you have to be very carefull of what to say, what to do or even what to feel bc boys might run and hide. Is ridiculous, horrible and exhausting.
    Thanks by the way Brian, I love your videos.

    • @itsmesia2469
      @itsmesia2469 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Agree...
      Edit: Maybe we women should not be that easy...
      Men always show more interest when they don't know where they have you .. when you are hard to get ..
      I learnt that the heard way...
      But I don't like to play games. Hate it. And I personally think it's childish... But idk... Don't like it... But anyway to be too easy to get or being needy is never good.. I guess.

  • @ELA-nu1pe
    @ELA-nu1pe 6 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    So....I am wondering how much research of "men" and "women" and "Relationships" you have done Brian Nox, to come to these conclusions that you are so confident about?! I am reacting negatively about the generalizations and game playing techniques....what about being genuine and honest and true...is there no room for this anymore?!
    My view is if I need to play so many games with a man, he is not the kind of person I want to spend the rest of my life with! Surely not all men are like this????!!!! there must be some emotionally intelligent and genuine men out there?!
    If I was to take your advice I would living a charade! Depressing!

    • @OlgaRykov
      @OlgaRykov 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Yes, there are mature men out there. But few. We each have to find ourselves one, if we're lucky, and love him. (I did, to be exact, and I'm happy and lucky!) PS. I clicked on the video not to watch it, but to connect with commenters and support those who oppose this bs and encourage honesty. I'm all for honesty and vulnerability.

  • @silverline8855
    @silverline8855 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    It's so difficult: when I'm honest about my feelings, and I tell a man I really love him & like him, I don't feel needy, it's just the truth. But then the mindgames stay.. It's exhausting. I don't want to be played around with. This is a man that needs to grow up. I do like him, but I won't let him treat me this way. He's very dishonest about his feelings and let me do all the work. It's exhausting. And it's not my fault, it's really a male distortion, this running & ghosting behaviour. But they don't understand I won't be there forever, so yes I'll move on with my life. It's his loss. I really opt out of playing games, done with that.

  • @emilliapeachrose5692
    @emilliapeachrose5692 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    But... i said "i like you" to him. And he only said "thanks" and crazy laugh emoticon... i thought i might do the wrong thing. But he keeps contacting me everyday. Even more intense than before.. and i love it!!

  • @rachelwilliams9686
    @rachelwilliams9686 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    This is very helpful. Thanks. There are too many of those "make him fall in love with you" type of videos that aren't so helpful. Sometimes all you need is "a sign" that he's interested so that you can work on building a relationship with them, even if it takes a while. Or to know that he's not interested in you so you don't hang around and waste your time if there's no chance he's ever going to date you. I wouldn't want to "trick" someone into falling in love with me. They should love me for who I really am, not just a fascade I've put up. Everyone's true colors come out eventually. It would be a shame to fall in love with someone, maybe even get married, and then realize who they really are.
    Sometimes it's just easier to stay friends with someone, even if you love them deep down. People are afraid of being rejected. All it would take is knowing that the other person likes you too. Unfortunately, you can't read their minds. People hide their true feelings and act akwardly because of it. Knowing some subtle ways to get them to open up about how they feel is helpful. You don't have to get out right rejected if they don't like you, but it might open some doors if they do. Maybe all they needed was for you to tell them it's unlocked in some way. Then they can decide whether they want to come in or keep walking.

  • @allnotathome
    @allnotathome 5 ปีที่แล้ว +107

    "He who needs the other one the most is always in the weakest position, and that's obviously the position you never want to be in".
    Listen, you dummy, if you have two people who follow this rule and enter into a relationship, then that relationship will end in 2 seconds.
    When did relationships between men and women become some sort of powergame from Game of Thrones?

    • @jgrrr9047
      @jgrrr9047 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      You're hilarious

    • @s.j.4061
      @s.j.4061 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      TRUELY TRUE !

    • @tiffknox
      @tiffknox 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Lol right?! Cheese and rice 🤦‍♀️

  • @tracyadamsphotograph
    @tracyadamsphotograph 6 ปีที่แล้ว +209

    These rules are stupid. Having to follow formulas and stroke a man's ego isn't for me. Make these videos for men if they are supposed to do the effort and chasing. Teach them to stop being little boys and grow up. Men need to stop telling women how to behave, stop seeing needs and emotions as weak and know who they are and what they want. It's been too long that women have to keep changing themselves to please men.

    • @vittoriasan1543
      @vittoriasan1543 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Twwah112 well, men wouldn't watch them, that is against theirs masculinity hahaha

    • @jazminavendano5205
      @jazminavendano5205 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      You're now my new personal hero...

    • @Delulu1001
      @Delulu1001 6 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      THANK YOU! They are always just telling women how to please men by not being themselves and NEVER tell men how to make up their beliefs and behavior.

    • @mudphud2b
      @mudphud2b 6 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      I agree. I think the sentence in the video, "Men scare easily" (have panic attacks, etc.) sums it up for me. If a man scares easily, he's weak. Or his heart's not open to love. Either way, I'd rather know that he's "skittish" and "afraid" up front, so I can stay the hell away from these men.

    • @king-nick2023
      @king-nick2023 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Vittoria San lol and here I am watching a video as a man

  • @NibberKSmooth
    @NibberKSmooth 6 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Most of us men don't play these childish games and do NOT want a complicated woman who has a Queen complex.

  • @bumblebeebazaar4018
    @bumblebeebazaar4018 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    You can't see it but I am scratching my head... Thank you for these videos. I am really trying to wrap my head around ”dating”, men, relationship style thinking. This may make a while... I appreciate your take/side on this as from the masculine half of the equation. I hope I get the chance to put it all to some good use!!!

  • @shebaalethsollinamor795
    @shebaalethsollinamor795 6 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    I wish I had someone to attract me to....but I’ll remember this if the time comes.

  • @elizabeththankfulshannon7455
    @elizabeththankfulshannon7455 6 ปีที่แล้ว +52

    I find it disturbing that we can't just be real with one another. This is teaching us to be conniving. We should be able to love one another at whatever pace. If a man is showering me with compliments and talking about marriage, and I've fallen madly in love with everything about him, why shouldn't I reciprocate? Why can't we love each other without rules? This how I've been my whole life, and I've been engaged numerous times (all broken off by me), and married once. So, clearly, being open and honest , and making the men in my life know that they are loved, hasn't been so wrong if most wanted to marry me.
    And then someone I'd known for over a decade online (through a mutual, very good friend), came into my life, telling me he'd always known that I was the one. I fell in love with him at first sight (the second time this has happened to me). Even strangers were drawn to us, because we radiated together. And then he f***ing ghosted me, and I have been devastated ever since. I moved on with someone else, but I simply can't erase the desire to be with him, even one year later. I do not contact him anymore, obviously, because he, clearly, does not want me to, but I miss him every single day. The thing is that he was pushing me to go so fast, and I kept asking him to slow down, just like Brian says in another video (though I hadn't watched it yet, I merely did what was instinctual). I needed a slower pace. I needed time to enjoy the initial process, however, despite that being Brian's advice, it seems to have backfired on me. But I cannot fathom for a second that he wasn't madly in love with me, too. Yes, he ghosted me (most likely because I don't follow rules, and probably contacted him too much), but I take issue with this message that a man who ghosts you cannot possibly love you, or that he has to be a psychopath. I think that sometimes people get terrified, depending on past experiences. (His divorce was, and still is, brutally painful and consistently stressful. His ex-wife has been nothing but vindictive.) And sometimes the timing is off. But when complete strangers are telling you that they've never seen a man so in love with a woman before, and you see for yourself that he is absolutely smitten, how can you then listen to a video saying that is not the case. It makes no sense to me, neither his actions, nor this video.

    • @yuppers1
      @yuppers1 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I think he got scared because it all became too real. It's less scary to love someone from afar. Sounds like he just wasn't ready.
      Brian's advice might have helped a little because it's less scary when you feel like you're chasing.

    • @acquadiamore
      @acquadiamore 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      That sounds like possible lovebombing - you may have dodged a bullet!

    • @nataliebutler
      @nataliebutler ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Something is going very wrong if you have broken off numerous engagements!

    • @rosadelrio5120
      @rosadelrio5120 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Sounds like cognitive disonance after narcissistic lovebombing. You owe to check it out, and get yourself checked too.

  • @미미월드-q5b
    @미미월드-q5b 6 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    This is a very good video, girls. BUT! You can give whatever compliment you like to a guy if he's already into you. Know what I'm saying?? You're pretty, lively, perky, (or loaded) and he likes you and you can say 'you look great, you look sexy' that kind of 'simple' compliments in early stage of dating. In other words, no amount of trying will ever change the man if he's NOT into you.

    • @francineharris9473
      @francineharris9473 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      He could like you, but because he don’t know you could be holding it back, for various reasons until he knows
      you better. On top of that all men don’t thank alike but the way that he talks make women think this.,
      On the other hand, most of them are. We also need to know if he’s a man or a grown boy.
      Grown boys play a to of games, but there some man out there that just want someone to love them.
      . Just like all women are not the same, but I do agree with the idea that we as women
      should not come on to strong to a man in the beginning of a relationship.
      On the other hand, this could be very hard if you have very strong feelings in the beginning. There are
      some women out there that could be a psychopaths so men have to careful as well. I believe when God sends you
      someone it will just work because what he gives it will add no sorrow. Women should go to him and ask
      him to send us the right person, but you should make sure that its from him. Sometimes people don’t
      meet the right person because thy don’t make themselves available meaning you can’t be found
      if your always in the house, and not meeting enough people. Meaning he can’t find you. You should
      not go places for only this reason but it does play a part.

  • @tanyaakh
    @tanyaakh 6 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    Brian, explain to me please, why the phrase "I WOULDN'T want you to get a crush on me" will supposedly work.It's just blatantly pointing out that you D'ONT like the guy. So he will very likely think - ok, she is not attracted to me and doesn't want anything with me and will move on to the next woman.

    • @lenasvn
      @lenasvn 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Tatiana Voyta Yes, very possible. A guy who doesn’t appreciate games won’t like this one.

    • @MsMesem
      @MsMesem 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@lenasvn They don't want to think that hard!!!!! Keep it basic or they just get confused and feel insulted. KISS

    • @ayliea3974
      @ayliea3974 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      I think Brian said that meaning don't come on too strong. Subtle is strong.

  • @Usern7842
    @Usern7842 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    I am following Brian's videos and I find most of them very helpful and it makes me understand the whole dating process more on a molecular level. However, I must agree with a lot of people leaving comments here - saying that a person looks attractive or sexy is NOT too much TOO soon, in my opinion. If you are a person who values yourself, you usually speak from a position of power (in a good way) and saying something like that does not necessarily mean that you are WEAK. Healthy people with normal level of education and healthy emotional behaviour like when others acknowledge their value, like attention and like taking compliments. Nobody wants or enjoys being ignored, by a person who he/she is interested in. Games only lead to more games and more manipulation. I am questioning now, whether some of us actually wants to be with a person who does not see our value or like is for real, but because we won some sort of a mind game battle?

  • @66hoodwitch
    @66hoodwitch 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You have to know 100% that the guy is worthy of being shown you like him... that's number 1, and very important!

  • @Amphitera
    @Amphitera 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    to all the lonely people out there, who are watching dating tips and videos and are ready to just give up and despair: I had a video in my recommendations about saving a sick kitten and nursing her back to health, she is fine now.
    And I realized there are so many things out there that are far more important than trying to find the "right person".
    Maybe you find someone, maybe you don't. So what. You can be just as happy if you stay single as long as your life is meaningful.
    Save a kitten, or another animal if you don't like cats, and you will never be alone.
    ps. Animals don't play annoying mindgames either, and they love you for who you are.

  • @AnneLaurieJoseph
    @AnneLaurieJoseph 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I have a date in two days, and it's with a guy I've known and liked for six years but haven't seen him in five years. I'm so glad I ran across this video because I don't feel as terrified anymore. Thanks for this; you just earned a new Subscriber

  • @aliciablunt4857
    @aliciablunt4857 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    It really not complicated, just take what works for you and leave the rest that doesnt make sense. There is no perfect formula for dating but I think he has a great point for people who have become aware that they are the common denominator in each failed dating attempt. Its not always your fault but creating a challenge and pace as a woman makes the court even and then you can both play play. Of course we and a wide range of personalities and interests, and its also important to make sure the people we invest in are making an investment in return. Its give and take and I think people are so scared to fail, we really just need to step away from perfection and accept an L when it happens

  • @miiakristiinasiimesto6352
    @miiakristiinasiimesto6352 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Honesty and Honey -Loving mixture. Truth is to be You as as a Wisdom - As A Lady - Be Your own Live’s Good Queens. There is a moment of Now in Everything. Be You in All times and never Loose Your crown of Light because of False Princes. Value listening so that You will hear the Truth in Everything and then decide what is best for You ❤️

  • @americablessgod1273
    @americablessgod1273 6 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    Oh no so I totally messed up my whole life.
    PLEASE MAKE A VIDEO ON HOW TO REVERSE WHAT WE DID AFTER WE SCARED HIM AWAY???

    • @duchessofluncheon2909
      @duchessofluncheon2909 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      a man should never be your whole life

    • @IwasBlueb4
      @IwasBlueb4 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      love your name.... America Bless God.....cool; Ur comment made me smile....just so spontaneous and innocent.... sooooooo, what happened ?? Did you happen to bump into him again, or have you found someone else ? you will get someone special....cos u r special

    • @Introvertliving
      @Introvertliving 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      😂

  • @tinabtm
    @tinabtm 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    For making this simple the best is to think of a guy you date like he is your friend, so you wont have a pressure on you, with people we are not so attracted we feel relaxed and most likely you won't say anything that can scare him

  • @djsemira1
    @djsemira1 6 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    i feel the same way when men hit me up with one liners, i feel like they say this to all women, they seem needy and that they are insincere.

    • @Applepie409
      @Applepie409 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Maybe a valid point

    • @IwasBlueb4
      @IwasBlueb4 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      exactly.... These women are not getting the point at all

  • @DiamondandLight
    @DiamondandLight 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    It's so weird how you're always so spot on

  • @saunterscamper3952
    @saunterscamper3952 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I love the “Wait, what?” part; that is so key. Also, that can lead a woman to see whether we have a fragile ego-ed man in front of us (a DANGER, DANGER situation). -An even more invaluable bit of info!

  • @lightl287
    @lightl287 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Life saving. Brian! I have been mistaking for sooooo many years 😱😳
    Thank you very much for clarification 🙏🙏
    You are doing amazing work! 👏👏👏

  • @AEJ1999
    @AEJ1999 6 ปีที่แล้ว +36

    I got exhausted just watching this video
    It may be true but that’s still so much effort lol

    • @OlgaRykov
      @OlgaRykov 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It's not true. He's talking about immature guys who are not ready for a relationship, not actual men with a brain and a heart.

  • @jennifermacisak7503
    @jennifermacisak7503 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Yeah..i agree with alot of others..damn this is all crazy..see i am super confident and do not EVER need my man..i like to be honest with ny guy and tell him i like or love him. Id love it for my man to tell me he loves me or lijes me..it doesnt seem weak..it seems confident actually.. I would never tell someone if i thought i would be rejected so obviously that would be confidence and not scared of rejection, you know?

  • @bellabwz
    @bellabwz 6 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Fix the core..be authentic love self n be ur self.thats all

  • @Christian_Girl120
    @Christian_Girl120 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I tend to be careful when I'm first meeting a guy, especially if I like him. I know a shy reserved guy at church who we have at least one thing in common. We're lectors at our Catholic Church. I think he used that common ground to speak to me at first. At least he doesn't try to avoid me. He gives me big hugs now with squeezes. This week I told him I missed him and was glad to see him. After that I wondered if I went too far. I second guess myself sometimes.

  • @agnieszkatyczynska5572
    @agnieszkatyczynska5572 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Thank you for an inspiring video. Yes, I have been making the mistakes you've mentioned, it's quite difficult to retrain, but it's worth it, isn't it? And it is where fun begins.

  • @threelittlebirds3361
    @threelittlebirds3361 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Well, I’ve watched the video, thought to myself “hmm this seems manipulative” “why should we play games - aren’t I loveable just being me?”
    But I realise, it’s true. People can be screwed up and get turned off by people being too real.
    Sad world we live in!
    It would be interesting having men weigh in on this video and give their opinions on this advice…
    Any takers?!

  • @janicetansooling600
    @janicetansooling600 5 ปีที่แล้ว +68

    Love is so complicated..just want to be a nun..its giving me headaches

    • @babypanda3694
      @babypanda3694 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Same here

    • @mymailmymail2256
      @mymailmymail2256 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Haha true dear..LOL..not jus headache but heartache too 🤭😜

    • @Amphitera
      @Amphitera 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      it was so much easier in the past. There was no "dating". Marriages were arranged by parents/families. If you didn't want to marry, you could become a monk/nun and be a highly respected person. And if you happened to fall in love with your spouse, the better.
      Makes you wonder if that wasn't the better system, seeing how weird the world has become.

    • @dottysicat7480
      @dottysicat7480 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yes...seriously considering. But then i would be a nun with hormones. Hmmm.😒

    • @cloudyday1617
      @cloudyday1617 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      It's funny but i recently did have that thought too!

  • @zazzyz4558
    @zazzyz4558 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    I adore this guy! Is it just me or is he wonderful beyond words? He makes my toes tingle!

  • @MENAGHA
    @MENAGHA 5 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    And then that man will say: "girls are complicated" lol

  • @becks5198
    @becks5198 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I really feel like you are in my room talking and giving me this advice. You’re good!!!

  • @princessvanessa873
    @princessvanessa873 6 ปีที่แล้ว +428

    I wish I had seen this video last month....😔

    • @fatimalmasri8723
      @fatimalmasri8723 6 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Princess Vanessa to me too😔

    • @dream8976
      @dream8976 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Me too

    • @caroh2809
      @caroh2809 6 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Princess Vanessa I know. We need the rescue plan....😔

    • @horrorzone476
      @horrorzone476 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Princess Vanessa me too

    • @anastasiyasdiary
      @anastasiyasdiary 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Me too lol

  • @Nanafachira
    @Nanafachira 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I watched this video trying to find help to go out with someone again after an immense break up in my life and after 4 years with only one person I came out in the "dating" world again that everything is changed. Now, it's a common opinion that to find the right person for you have to be whole, healthy, realized, self-conscious, strategic, busy, have a career and be a speech/action planner. Otherwise, you will only get terrible people with you.
    I am honestly tired and fed up. If anyone is watching this video, please don't listen, just be yourself. Be broken, sad, unhappy, unhealthy, insecure, you DESERVE to be loved. YOU. DESERVE. TO. BE. LOVED. Find compassion for yourself, find love inside you, love yourself deeply even in the worst situations as you would like a lover to do because that's the point.
    Neediness doesn't exist, if you a guy runs away because you're needy just tell him to go fuck himself and move on.
    Can we please stop to spread this shit? Please.

  • @louisecohoe2015
    @louisecohoe2015 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Thank you - this is just mind-blowing advice. I really enjoy your style of presentation and the level of understanding of the male persona is so incredibly helpful. Thank you for your wisdom and making me feel like a real person again! Blessings to you.

  • @autumns0ng509
    @autumns0ng509 6 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    why do I even try.
    With my luck I'll scare my crush away when I sneeze.

  • @tiffanymarieelizabeth
    @tiffanymarieelizabeth 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    I’ve asked lots of men if I should tell my crush that I like him, and they all said yes. Why are you saying the opposite?

    • @Flixy282
      @Flixy282 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      He’s saying to give him opportunities to impress you “you can show him you like him without being needy”

  • @micheleortiz5456
    @micheleortiz5456 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Your video popped up on my phone at just the right time. Thank u for your amazing and enlightening advice

  • @JuiceyJuice611
    @JuiceyJuice611 6 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    I'm too much of a cave woman/mixed with savage beast....too impatient for this..I tried it Brian but...it takes toooooooo long. I want it noooowwwwwwwww😓😢😭

  • @lovelight5867
    @lovelight5867 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Just invest strongly in yourselves, ladies!!!...fall in love with yourself and your life. Love your single life and be comfortable and confident as hell in front of men or in any company and genuently enjoy your day! Then go home proudly leaving guys wondering!...Be the queen you truelly are, love yourself and enjoy life!:)

  • @natgeox
    @natgeox 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I'm an alpha female. I do and say what I like. Men fall in love way too fast with me and never get over/forget me. So, this advice, maybe for some. Just be confident and do what you like, if they dont like it meh, move along...plenty more frogs in the pond 💅

  • @andromedanstarseedtarot8738
    @andromedanstarseedtarot8738 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Haha this is how I flirt!! Giving compliments but like passive ones. Always get them thinking. Thanks for the helpful info. Trying to not show I'm too keen to guy I currently like.

  • @naowaratmarshall2154
    @naowaratmarshall2154 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Forget ..... IT ... NO NEED MAN IN LIFE ... HAPPY TO BE SINGLE 🥶

  • @tikafeng5448
    @tikafeng5448 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I love the expressiveness of the beautiful English fluently

  • @msdecemberloveangel8236
    @msdecemberloveangel8236 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I was being myself and dated this man for 3 years. He made breakfast for me brought it to me made love to me and when I fell in love with him he Ghosted me and blocked me and I'm still in awe like what in the hell did I do to him.

    • @avril.227
      @avril.227 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Ms December Love Angel he didn’t love himself, so he couldn’t believe you loved him either
      Beta male ... you need an equal

    • @cynthiadowning8694
      @cynthiadowning8694 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      You met a narcissist

  • @konianfatima7025
    @konianfatima7025 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I loved my cousin since my teen age and never thought of anyone else as my life partner but him, never even allowed anyone in my life, because of my loyalty to my love and feelings, as far as I can remember I loved him since I was 17 and now I am 22,
    It was only in the dec of 2017 four days before his birthday that I send him friend request and directly proposed him without even waiting, our first conversation was about how I felt for him since days and this caused him to hit me with a no and a rejection.
    I was shattered, how quickly he told no and walked away, while I waited for years to get him
    I now realise from this video I did utterly wrong by saying him truth so early ( atleast for him its early, for me he was always there as my potential life partner)
    I really wonder even today what could b the reason to be so harsh and not even considering me for a second, I don't know the mindset of boys, but I know that either him or no one, one-sided ofcourse but my love for him is true..
    Please help me, I cannot forget him, nor do I want anyone else because that could be betrayal for the person I would b dating if I cannot love him..

    • @kaneezfatima7325
      @kaneezfatima7325 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      konian fatima Move on. Your cousin could have handled this in a mature way or better way..since he didn't he does not deserve you...and you need to move on. Yes your love is true but that doesn't necessarily mean you will not think about yourself. The good thing about you is you are loyal and courageos but the bad thing is you should really take time to know the person to whom you are giving or gonna spend your life with...which you didn't do.

    • @konianfatima7025
      @konianfatima7025 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Kaniz Fatima Thank you so much dear. I will try my best to move on. Yes there are better things in this world except him. I'll stop obsessing over him and leave everything on God.
      I think we have no right to love anyone. Because the end is simply not in our hands. We should just accept life the way it manifests, atleast in these matters.

    • @dollsub6
      @dollsub6 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      konian fatima you can't marry your cousin