Well for me I'm trying to understand it and it seems somewhat... surreal, which I mean it probably felt more to them than me! But it's just super confusing and hard to understand. In the beginning I was very skeptical but as soon as I saw a few videos I could understand better what this was and how it works, I guess I just thought it was impossible but I have definitely been proven wrong
This just reminded me of a very interesting thing that happened a while ago. So for several years, Lily (one of our alters) went dormant. I hadn't seen or heard from her in years. However at one point I saw her in my dreams for the first time. I talked to her and interacted with her like we were good friends. The next day or so, she started fronting again and she still does now. Kinda crazy how that works.
I am so tired of people telling other people that something about them is “a choice”. “Being gay is a choice.” “Being trans is a choice.” “Having DID is a choice.” You aren’t in someone else’s mind or body, so you don’t GET to tell someone else how they’re feeling, or what their life is!! If more people would just worry about themselves, and mind their own business, the problems in this world would decrease dramatically!
Being gay is not a choice. Accepting that you are, and wearing the label with pride is. Same with the others. It's not always easy to have such a broad label, but we must always educate to help others accept themselves and there situation.
My mom has DID too (found out a couple of years ago, which I didn't know of until now because I was young) and thanks to your channel I can now understand what it exactly is. I found your channel a couple months ago and I really loved it (still do) because it's so interesting. Thanks to you I can understand my mom better now and help her in ways now, which I couldn't do before. I want to thank you for being out here on youtube and share your information about it because it really helped me and my family! I love all of you , keep going this way and you will help and inspire more people
Roo I have a question and I’m sorry if it comes of rude or something like that, you don’t have to answer. Are all your moms alters your mom or is only one alter your mom? I’m so curious!
@@spaghetti9976 wow, gotta say that is a great question... (without coming off like I'm trying to pry, you worded that far more eloquently). I was thinking how lucky Roo's mum is to have such a wonderfully supportive child, which is obviously attributed to her being such a wonderful Mum. I know how special my Mum is to me and that's just fantastic to have that support in one other.
Shit guys. Thanks for the likes!! I've never had this many before! In honesty I wasn't expecting any 😂 it's lovely to see so many people care about the DissociaDID system :) ❤️
I recently learned about something known as Internal Family Systems, and it really helped me understand some of our more destructive behaviors. Like the fact that your prosecutor was basically trying to help you, just doing a horrible job of it. I thought my suicidal thoughts were like this splinter in my brain that was just trying to hurt me, but now I understand that it was giving me a sense of control. Like if my mind was going to hurt me, kick me and beat me down, I always had an escape hatch, albeit a permanent one. Now that I'm healthier mentally, when my suicidal thoughts come back (rarely, I'm happy to say), I sort of thank them for trying to help. I think "hey we can figure this out, maybe I will need you someday, but right now I need another solution because things aren't that dire yet." It has strangely helped me a lot. Validating the thoughts, telling them they aren't bad or useless and are deep down a good person, seems to sooth them. Internal Family Systems suggests treating every aspect of yourself like a child. If your kid is making a mess in a grocery store, you don't ignore them, you don't tell them they are a stupid screw-up, you grab them and say "Hey, I need you to stop making a mess, if you just stay with me, when we get home I will help you build a big tower of blocks and we can knock it down. This just isn't the place to push things over." It's like redirecting the behavior rather than trying to eliminate it. That total internal world-view change has really affected my relationship with myself in a positive way.
Very helpful! I've been doing something like this recently, which has helped me a lot. I like your way of explaining it and I'll continue to develop my own way as well. Thank you!
you seemed so emotional when talking about the persecutor and im very proud of you to be able to talk about this with us, however i would like to remind you to be careful not to upset yourself! xx stay strong lovely 🌺
Your videos are so educating. My friend has D.I.D and your videos help me understand what they have been through. It also helps me to understand how I can help them.
Your ending really reminded me of my all-time favourite quote, which is from Harry Potter: "Of course it's happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it's not real?" Thank you for sharing, Chloe x
I think she would definitely have some great advice for the system. Plus, Jessica and DissociaDID are all lovely people and it would warm my heart to see them being supportive.
Wow it’s so interesting how the more I watch you the more I can tell when it seems someone is close to the front. Like I always feel like I can hear Kyle when You start speaking on topics that you may need extra support or protection to get through it. Kyle you are an awesome protector. Keep it up 👍🏻
In a different video Kyle talked about how he always hovers close to the front while they're filming in case it ever gets to be too much. Its easy to see why hes the primary protector, hes always keeping an eye on things and looking out for the system :)
Hadassah Kraushar Yes! It’s so misunderstood and really hard when people your whole life don’t understand and call you lazy and make you feel worthless. When most of us already struggle and just wish to be able to live a “normal” active life. It can be isolating which on top of mental illness is hard. One of the only thing to help me is Makeup bc I can do it in the house and in bed.
You seemed a bit upset when talking about your persecutor, I hope you're all doing okay and you didn't push yourselves too hard when filming this! Remember that you never need to include things or talk about them in detail if they make you uncomfortable, and please take your time filming these more emotionally taxing videos. I know you treat this as a job, but TH-cam is the kind of exhausting job you never truly get a break from, please don't be afraid to give yourself time to wind down and relax. We absolutely wouldn't mind waiting a few extra days to give you the time needed for health and stability, especially on videos that bring up traumatic memories. Take care of yourselves! 💕
@@brennak2053 that's exactly what I was thinking! I think the body would rock a pixie cut, and you can style one to be more masculine or feminine so it could help with some of the alters' dysmorphia
Kay_ Ck well of course it matches their eyebrows, you aren’t just born with eyebrows of one colour and head hair of a different colour lmao. All your hair is the same colour unless u dye it
Recently we've been having recurring nightmares and when you started talking about the ones you had it kind of scared me because it's like oh my, I've had that exact experience. We've had the same nightmare recurring for 4 days and in all dreams it happened in the same building and the same thing happened. Over and over. We split twice because of those nightmares and had to take a week off school because it was too much to deal with. The nightmares were about a trauma that the host didn't know we even went through and so it really shocked and scared him when he started realising why he was dreaming about that happening. He's been denying us and our DID for so long and I think this is the thing that made it definite for him. These dreams felt so real and- (he kept saying things like "disgusting. Why would I even think that? Why would anyone do that? There's no way that happened. It's just a messed up dream. That can't happen to me") I'm an alter with -probably the most flashbacks, nightmares and PTSD in general, to be honest- in our system and I hate to see another alter or just a person having to relive and go through things like that. It's heartbreaking. Those nightmares happened last week and we're going to talk about them to a new therapist we're getting! (We're excited because the last therapists weren't too great) anyway thanks for reading. Also DissociaDID and anyone else reading this, I love you. You are important. You matter. You are loved. You can make a difference. You can get help. You are beautiful and unique. ❤💕 okay goodbye :)) - Percy
I'm curious -- do you (or any other alters) dream while NOT fronting in the body? Also thank you so much for always being so vulnerable, Chloe. You deserve to keep private whatever it is you need, but the stories you are willing to share are extremely insightful and, at least for me, help me to have a much greater understanding of how it feels to live in your world. Much love
"Sleepwalking" and trying to jump out of a window because I was running from a bad guy was what took me to therapy. I had "sleptwalked" my whole life. Come to find out I have DID and my alters wake up and take over at night which looks like sleep walking.
This is kinda weird timing cuz last night in my dream I was walking along and I saw u, and I was gonna say hi Chloe but it didn’t quite seem like Chloe so I said “Hi are you DissociaDID?” Whoever was fronting said yes and we had a short conversation, then we both went our seperate ways and the dream continued. It was just a normal dream for me but the fact that I woke up to see this vid is weird haha
I needed to hear this. I have met alters in my dreams. The very first time I met an alter was actually in a dream and I was always afraid I was crazy or that people just don't meet alters like that. Thank you so much for this video - Jenny the host
Thanks so much for sharing with us, I wish you all health safety and happiness. Just wanted to say that I hate when ppl say it's 'all in your head' as if it's any less real...of course it's all in my head, that's where my brain is...I wouldn't tell someone that their broken arm is 'all in your arm' !?
You said when you were lucid dreaming if you've realized you're having a nightmare you could wake yourself up, i wonder if that is also your system being protective without realization. I understand that everyone in the system has their own dreams but since you have met alters before in dreams could it be that your lucid dreaming stages were also there for an instinctive need to protect the system may be? It just made me curious i don't know if you've ever talked about it with the other alters about it so may be you have idk.
When I was editing I was actually wondering if someone else was waking the body up because they could sense my distress or the nightmare was getting too close to a trauma memory I wasnt ready to see xxx
I know this is a late reply, but I just wanted to put in the fact that I can do this too. I was having a nightmare once (it was a lucid dream-so maybe that explains it), and the people in it were telling me to “wake up”. So, I did. I’ve done this with other dreams as well-just thought I might put it in here. :) Edit: I don’t have D.I.D. by the way, no offense, just clarifying. 😅
B L U E P R I N T my lucid dream was weirder. I tried explaining to the dream people that it was a dream. So I tried something I’d heard a TH-camr say a long time ago. I shot fireballs out of my mouth. It worked. Idk either ._.
This situation happened to our host, and so this video unfortunately was lightly triggering. We didn’t think any other systems experienced it! Thank you for being so open and honest with us all, you are all so brave! -Ash
Dream biology and psychology and purpose is fascinating, but with DID in the mix, it just proves that it is something way more complex than even we realise. It takes the idea of a conscious and subconscious mind so much deeper
Can I just say before watching, that I’m so happy you could edit and push through today and post! Thank you for taking the time even though this was very triggering and draining for you! Now going to watch, but just a pre-thank you!
I find this interesting because I don't dream. Perhaps it's alters fronting during that time to protect me from what my dreams are about. Could you do a video on protectors and prosecutors? In my younger days I made the mistake of trying to restrain my protector and he turned into a prosecutor which lead to legal troubles because in a violent environment like prison and jail he had full control. I'm receiving therapy but it's hard to find a so called "specialist ". In fact I've spent most my life trying to get help only to be met with disbelief. Luckily now I have a therapy team that is trying to learn together with me my alters and even my ex wife but now we still struggle with making him a protector again after all the physical and mental abuse he has given not only those around us but ourselves as well.
Thank you, thank you, thank you! For this video! We've had dreams of each other and with each other, you are the first person to validate our dreaming experiences. Everyone else we've talked to about this has said it does not happen with them or that they've never heard of it happening, i was beginning to think we were the only one to have such dreams. I've met three alters for the first time in a dream and I've had nightmares orchestrated by a persecutor! Those are the worst because they do know you so well, your strengths, your weaknesses and your greatest fears!
You're so mature Chloe, you really make a lot of us believe in recovery (Knowing it is a constant job). You're all making a difference with this channel. Btw, your black hair looks AMAZING
I love love Soul Eaters so much. I never really though about how profound it is to DID. The characters needed to work really well with their weapons which could be seen as alters. That scene where Soul is talking to this trickster who wants to take over his system by tricking him irt Maka just brought a lot more perspective.
Hey, I noticed you called your system the "mirrored" system. How did you come up with that ?? How do systems get names ?? Don't answer if you aren't comfortable, I was just wondering 😊
@@alannahseaton6483 We came up with our system name because in the inner world lots of us were found in one of those hall of mirrors places you find in carnivals! We aren't all that creative with naming the system
I can’t watch videos longer than 5 minutes because I have the attention span of a 5 year old but this is the first channel where I watch the entire video
This was a great video, very put together. Funnily enough, our next video for next week is going to cover DID and sleep/ dreaming. Guess great minds think alike 😊. -Kit
I am the host for the former @Kesha Rhinestone system and as a Brit living in Long Beach who grew up in Wembley Park in the London area and even though the body has never been to London, we're still on UK time and wide awake at 3:42 in the morning California time after 4 hours of sleep from 4am to 8am UK time. We just ate lunch and now going down for an afternoon nap with it being quarter til noon and pitch black (or might as well be based on circadian rhythm)
Thank you for the sleep tip. This is now Nadia. I'm a 25 year old mum with a one year old going for a nap for Isabelle's system. It's just after 12 noon and pitch black because the body's in California even though I'm in London.
I’m glad you posted this, we all really appreciate you guys. We know that this video turned out to be hard to film. Past that, please keep your system health and safety in mind. Take as much time as you need to do the things you wish to do. 💕💕💕💕
I love you all so much. I found your channel last week, and I have three things to say: I have a crush on Kyle, please make a CFS video, and THANK YOU TIMES 10000 FOR EVERYTHING YOU ARE DOING FOR THE DID AND MENTAL HEALTH COMMUNITIES. All of you are changing this world for the better.
Hi Chloe :-) So glad you got this up on time - can't wait to see it so thank you! Really appreciate all you do to inform and educate us (I don't have DID but since starting to watch your channel I have become fascinated and think what you do is awesome! It has really made me much more aware.) Enjoy the rest of your day and look after yourself! Love from London xxx
I dream like that. I dream in 3rd person 90% of the time and I think of it like that too watching someone else play a video game I usually just stay and watch it play out bc it interests me. I don't push it to be something else. I switch from being first person to third person throughout the night. Has anyone else without DID experienced this too?...and often dreams I remember I think of it like there's 2 of me .
I don't have DID and the vast majority of my dreams are in first person, but I have had dreams in the third person before. I know I've had some that felt like playing video games, and one in particular was like watching a movie. During some movie scenes I was watching it, and in others I was one of the characters in first person. I had written that dream down in my dream journal so I'm pretty sure that's how it played out. I don't think I've ever had a lucid dream in the third person, but I totally get just going with the flow of a dream to see what happens next.
You are such a trooper :) I hope you all continue to stay safe. Thank you for posting these videos as I’m learning more and more about D.I.D. It definitely changed my perspective on things :) also, I’m really happy for you and Nan
While she explaining the dreams in my mind I imagined them waking up and having conversation like "did you see Kyle's dream last night? It was SOO weird" and then a different alter is like "yeah that was weird" a different alter: "I didn't see it what happened?" 😂😂😂 I don't even know
Hey, I know this is an old video, but I was amazed listening to your description of the character you had nightmares about. I had nightmares about a character exactly like that, shape shifting and everything, except mine was a fox. Then I also had a one dream where I managed to defeat it and didn't dream about it since. I also have CPTSD and high level dissociation after childhood trauma - I just wanted to say this incase you see it so you know you're not alone x
wow this is really interesting. i've never considered what would happen in the mind of someone with DID when they were dreaming. thank you for sharing your experience
This is kinda appropriate because you’re talking about dreaming! I get really (really) bad sleep paralysis at time and usually it’s a horrible experience, grim hallucinations and the like, and it can go on for maybe ten minutes or so. I often nap while listening to TH-cam or podcasts, and a few days ago I fell asleep and had a really bad sleep paralysis attack while listening to your video (I think it was the one about your littles). This was the first time I’ve had sleep paralysis and and not had a horrific time, instead of having a panic attack or anything else like that I just chilled out and listened to you educating me about DID until I could move again, so thank you for that! That’s never happened before, usually when I’m listening to something while having an attack it makes it even worse, but for some reason your video didn’t do that! Thank you for all your amazing content :)
We have someone who really really really struggles with sleep & we've literally wound up hospitalized for the insomnia in the past. Acknowledging her, listening to her and her fears/needs/etc., and being able to communicate with her some has helped tremendously with the insomnia. It doesn't help that she refuses to acknowledge that "any of this is real," though.
“The body” I love how in control they seem. I understand it’s hard and that they cannot control everything that is happening, but they seem so good at communicating and working together
I just wanted to let you know how much I love your videos. My girlfriend has DID (self diagnosed atm but is planning to go to a professional soon) and before I met her I didn’t know that something like DID even existed. She gave me a rundown of what it was but I was still kind of confused and skeptical, but as soon as I found your videos it all started to really make sense and help me to understand who she is and how to help and and her system. So thank you so much and keep up the good work. But don’t overwork yourself. 😊
literally two days after posting this we broke up because it was long distance and the host of their system asked out a girl in their town so oof. luckily we still on good terms but like wow that timing could not have been worse.
Please take good care of yourselves ! I know this video was particularly hard for you and I really hope you didn’t push yourselves too far for our sake. Lots of love !
15 years of struggling, YOUR videos have helped me massively with taking my fist step to getting help. I know I have ‘aulters’ but will not claim any disorder without a medical diagnosis. Massive thank you 🙏. You made some disturbing thoughts and realities into something that doesn’t seem so ‘odd’ (wrong wording but) just thanks 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
At 11:25 onwards, I almost started crying, I understand the feeling of not having any worth so strongly, I am still going through those feelings and my counselor is currently trying to help me, it makes it seem so much more real when you hear someone else say exactly how you feel
I have been able to acknowledge I am in a nightmare and forcefully wake myself up since I was a child. It is only with nightmares, never normal dreams. And it's always been really interesting to me I hadn't met another person who could - so hearing that there was a period of time where you could do that makes me feel...I'm not sure the word for it. A synonym for validated, but I guess it also isn't really validation. Just..nice. I don't have DID, but my dreams have always played a very heavy roll in displaying emotions I wasn't processing. For the longest time, though, I wasn't aware of what any of them meant. I'm very detached from my emotions, so everything was finding it's way into my dreams. And a lot of it was very scary. Your nightmares must have been so terrifying, but I'm glad you were able to learn what you needed to from them to better yourself.
Cryptic Luna I used to have tons of nightmares as a child, and I did this quite often. I don’t really do it anymore, as I almost never have nightmares now. It’s quite a bizarre skill to have, isn’t it? But super useful to protect your mind as a kiddo.
I can never thank you enough for your videos. At first it was just curiosity and education. And now this one brought so much needed knowledge. It's 3am i had a terrifying dream that felt so real I couldn't bring myself to look around my room even I just immediately grabbed my phone to watch your videos. You have a calming voice and are so articulate and strong I feel courage from all you've gone through. I realllyyy don't think I have DID, but I've been working on IFS (Internal family system) with my therapist and there are definitely 'parts' I've discovered with ages, and appearances but (So far?) No name or role knowledge... as far as I know no one fronts and I have no amnesia...I know this is an old video and my comment is super long but I was genuinely terrified of my dream just now I felt everything and I have had lucid dreaming of an inner world since I was a child and I can't close my eyes right now without going right back so I'm awake watching your videos ❤
Once again, all my alters enjoyed this video so much!’ Sorry were a little late chimpz has been stressing over the boat tomorrow as we have strong winds ahhh, love your videos and channel Chloe!
This reminds me of how our core met Silva, one of the protectors. She was dreaming of a deep, dark cave that appeared to have no end, and the light of Silva's wings (she's a faery) led her back to the light. She presented herself at this point because our core had lost her childhood friend to the dreaded S word (I don't want to inadvertently trigger someone) and had decided to give up on writing and creative outlets in the pursuit of her own self-destruction. Silva is a creative, free-spirited alter, and she convinced our core not to give up on her dreams. Thank you for sharing your story, Chloe. It must have taken a tremendous amount of courage to face that memory again. Thank you.
This could not have come at a better time!!! Last night, a couple of us were dreaming, and got the chance to look in a mirror within one of our dreams. Saw a person who looks very different from the body (an alter I as a host met for the first time). Our dreams were incredibly vivid and immersive and our memory about those dreams is VERY good. Near total recall. And I’m personally used to seeing rapid and drastic changes of dreams, but our dreams have gotten to a new level of different for us recently. Wonderful to hear your perspective and experience, and it’s informative and affirming as always. Thank you!
I'm so excited!!! You all have taught me so much about DID and I love watching your videos and it's inspired me to want to learn more about DID and other misunderstood/mental illnesses that have many misconceptions with them
It's very interesting how you described how Demon used your dreams to teach you a lesson. I don't have DID, but I've definitely had reoccurring dreams with characters that seem to be trying to push me in one direction or another, or even provide something I've been craving but in a less than ideal manner. I do have other mental and physical disorders (my body and brain don't seem to get along very well). It's really nice to hear someone else talk about those kinds of dreams! Brains are weird, man.
Love you and your system Chloe! Thank you for sharing. You are so brave and strong for getting through this like you did. You are an inspiration to us all 🥰😘
I love that you point out that just because something is happening in your mind doesn't mean it's not "real"! As you said, the brain is an organ as real as any other body part. I deal with a few mental illnesses in my life, and the attitude that it's not "real" has always infuriated me. Thanks for your videos. I have been watching your videos, along with those of others in the DID TH-cam community, for a few months now, and I've found them very educational. What used to seem like a strange illness now makes so much sense to me.
I appreciate a lot that you filmed this video, it was very brave of you and I know talking about it must have been difficult. Thank you for helping us understand how dreaming works and what a persecutor is. What you guys do is awesome!❤️
One of my littles came to me in a dream. She came right up to my face, placed her hands on my cheeks and said 'if you were more childlike we could be friends'. It was a very powerful experience.
You teach me so much every time you post a video, your so strong just by talking about this, and (from a diff video) I agree with jade how this could be very dangerous due to people who take advantage of people. And I'm so surprised that you talk about this. But thank you so much for teaching us. Thank you all of you from me!(I love all of you guys)
I don't know anyone with DID but you have opened my eyes to a fascinating and scary world. I really appreciate your extremely open and honest content that allows people like me a window into the life you lead. You are so strong and beautiful and I hope you know there are so many strangers out there that admire you. Thank you to your entire system for allowing the world a peak inside your mind.
I was watching one of my fictive alters' dreams once without realizing it. I've also met him several times in dreams. He's dedicated to keeping my health from failing completely and making sure that I know I'm loved. He's often forced me to go to sleep when I have insomnia. Just like you I used to be able to realize I was dreaming sometimes and change nightmares into something less scary.
interesting stuff as always. I'm really glad I found your channel otherwise I'd have taken Split or Criminal Minds or anything like that and assumed that's what DID is. I was going to say I hope youre okay but that sounds a bit silly, so I hope that your youtube and DID community can make you feel safer. (not that that doesn't sound even sillier.) you're doing some really fanatics stuff.
I love how much I get out of these videos even tho I do not have DID. I have OCD/anxiety/depression and tend to ruminate over thoughts and put a lot of guilt on myself. The part about being a martyr really resonated with me. I tend to strive to be my best and am really hard on myself/put myself last. I am realizing that it is not always good to be that way.
I would love a video about your CFS, how you were diagnosed and what symptoms you presented early on. I’ve been wondering lately if I have it (a not so terrible case compared to some people). So info on that would be interesting and also informative! As to the dreams, I’m very proud of you for even speaking on the topic. I know this video had some repercussions in the system so thank you for sharing.💕
This helps me feel valid. This is all very new and super scary for me. I was asleep but not completely and i had an alter who hold anger just yell and get in my face and then i fell asleep and dreamed. But she introduced herself and it felt so real. This whole thing is a huge struggle and something i wasn't prepared for at all. I feel like ive lived my whole life losing time and being so out of it and when i hunted down an answer i got the worst gift in the world.
I have CFS too and would certainly appreciate more awareness spread for it. There's still stigma for that, even from members of my family, and it's simply unjustified when it's a clinical diagnosis. It is so hard for me to treat, various meds have horrible side effects, and even got a death threat for "laziness" once. I'll never forget it. People could learn better. There's opportunity to know better. They don't have to feel desperate about someone being different. I didn't get a choice. Thankyou for the conversation as always. You are simply a beautiful person and you are very much worth loving yourself and selves. It's selfcare. *hugs*
this, for some of us, explains the ability of 'lucid dreaming' which i have been always do - and oh, my - you just mentioned that . ! ! And thank you for that bit about the importance of communication all the time for a good life - this is what IFS and my doctor believes - to honour all and alway s keep communication going as much as possible. Oh, i hate those dreams that feel like you are awake and can't wake up
I know he was scary but I'm so proud of your bravery to face him. Your system is stronger now then it ever was before so I hope this time you have other alters by your side if he shows up.
great video sweetie. You can tell this was hard for you to talk about, thank you for sharing with us. We tagged you in a tweet on twitter which will hopefully cheer you up. big hugs
Honestly, I'm working on getting a diagnosis for OSDD, and the longer that passes the more confused I get. I had a dream last night of a very kind but apathetic person named literally just 'orange person' and I'm struggling to find out if she was an alter or not. I just have to say, though, your videos make my entire week so much better. I'm always looking forward to them simply because of how amazing they are. ^^ Thanks you so much for helping people understand about DID and OSDD. You're one of the bravest people here on youtube. My communication with everyone has been sucky lately, but I know that most of them see you as a person who helped us as well as inform us. I can't express my gratitude enough.
Thank you so much for telling us your story with meeting a persecutor in a dream. I think we can all tell how much strength that took you to talk about. I’m so proud of you! When you were talking about not allowing yourself to live purely as a martyr, that really hit home for me. Love to all the alters! Hope you have some good night sleeps and beautiful days in the future 💕
A lot of the stuff you said also relates to my system. I as well have also met a persecutor through a dream and it was the most realistic dream I ever had and it was so frightening. Fortunately for me that was a bit ago and that situation has been delt with but thank you for sharing your story and keep up the good work! Also I do have a suggestion for a video, is it okay if you talk about naming systems? My system is still in need of a name and maybe you could give us some inspiration or ideas on how we can get that name. Anyway, love you so much! Don't stop what you're doing! ❤
These videos have helped me identify my own struggles with DID and they’ve finally given me the insensitive to actually see a therapist and tell them what’s wrong for once, ily all!!
(A sign Kyle put on the door): Guys, we need to sleep, please go to bed..
(A little): That sign won't stop me because I don't know how to read!
I relate to this so much
❤Underrated Comment!😆
hhahhahhaha thats great
Lmao
I HAVE A LITTLE MEME ON OUR PHONE! THAT'S VERY RELATABLE! (Tho it's about candy and eating it past bed time)
Albus Dumbledore: Just because its happening inside your head, why on earth should that mean its not real.
I thought this quote was fitting.
I was thinking of this quote too! ^.^
this isn't important but i liked at 394 and thought that was fitting lol
Yesssss you made me guy love albus
GASP WE ARE USING THIS!
It's definitely happening... our alters can get physically hurt in the inner world
@@Ghostinaboat if one gets amnesia will everyone have it?
*_I can just imagine this happening..._*
Chloe: _K, time to slee-_
Little: *_You gonna finish that chocolate cake tho?_*
Lol
*wheeze*
That's me at 2 am
Haha I could see that too ❤️
lollll
I really don't understand how people don't "believe" in DID.. it's like saying you don't "believe" in diabetes lol
It’s probably the same people who think being transgender is “just taking your gayness too far”
@@mj5697 wait people think that?? that's gross
Well for me I'm trying to understand it and it seems somewhat... surreal, which I mean it probably felt more to them than me! But it's just super confusing and hard to understand. In the beginning I was very skeptical but as soon as I saw a few videos I could understand better what this was and how it works, I guess I just thought it was impossible but I have definitely been proven wrong
My brother though DID didn’t exist cuz it was barely introduced to him. I don’t think he does anyway even now that I explained it to him
Because of Split and Psycho.
When you said “ he looks like this” 11:08 an ad for a medicine commercial played and it was a middle aged overweight man
😅
Ha!
That happened to me to except it was a news ad.
lol
Ahhh! Not the *medicine maaaan* 😱😱😱
This just reminded me of a very interesting thing that happened a while ago. So for several years, Lily (one of our alters) went dormant. I hadn't seen or heard from her in years. However at one point I saw her in my dreams for the first time. I talked to her and interacted with her like we were good friends. The next day or so, she started fronting again and she still does now. Kinda crazy how that works.
I am so tired of people telling other people that something about them is “a choice”.
“Being gay is a choice.”
“Being trans is a choice.”
“Having DID is a choice.”
You aren’t in someone else’s mind or body, so you don’t GET to tell someone else how they’re feeling, or what their life is!!
If more people would just worry about themselves, and mind their own business, the problems in this world would decrease dramatically!
Being gay is not a choice.
Accepting that you are, and wearing the label with pride is.
Same with the others.
It's not always easy to have such a broad label, but we must always educate to help others accept themselves and there situation.
Arbor Meow You’re so right!
I dont think anyone would say DID is a choice
DID isnt a choice. No child should have to go through unimaginable trauma from another person. And no child would chose to.
Agree
My mom has DID too (found out a couple of years ago, which I didn't know of until now because I was young) and thanks to your channel I can now understand what it exactly is. I found your channel a couple months ago and I really loved it (still do) because it's so interesting. Thanks to you I can understand my mom better now and help her in ways now, which I couldn't do before. I want to thank you for being out here on youtube and share your information about it because it really helped me and my family! I love all of you , keep going this way and you will help and inspire more people
Roo I have a question and I’m sorry if it comes of rude or something like that, you don’t have to answer. Are all your moms alters your mom or is only one alter your mom? I’m so curious!
@@spaghetti9976 wow, gotta say that is a great question... (without coming off like I'm trying to pry, you worded that far more eloquently).
I was thinking how lucky Roo's mum is to have such a wonderfully supportive child, which is obviously attributed to her being such a wonderful Mum.
I know how special my Mum is to me and that's just fantastic to have that support in one other.
Julia Haddad watch many sides of jane ! she has two kids and her friends always ask how it is being a mom and having DID
Oh bless your heart. I hope you guys didn't push yourselves too much to get this out on time. We would have happily waited ❤️
@Paige Beck we all do ♡
Shit guys. Thanks for the likes!! I've never had this many before! In honesty I wasn't expecting any 😂 it's lovely to see so many people care about the DissociaDID system :) ❤️
I recently learned about something known as Internal Family Systems, and it really helped me understand some of our more destructive behaviors. Like the fact that your prosecutor was basically trying to help you, just doing a horrible job of it. I thought my suicidal thoughts were like this splinter in my brain that was just trying to hurt me, but now I understand that it was giving me a sense of control. Like if my mind was going to hurt me, kick me and beat me down, I always had an escape hatch, albeit a permanent one.
Now that I'm healthier mentally, when my suicidal thoughts come back (rarely, I'm happy to say), I sort of thank them for trying to help. I think "hey we can figure this out, maybe I will need you someday, but right now I need another solution because things aren't that dire yet."
It has strangely helped me a lot. Validating the thoughts, telling them they aren't bad or useless and are deep down a good person, seems to sooth them. Internal Family Systems suggests treating every aspect of yourself like a child. If your kid is making a mess in a grocery store, you don't ignore them, you don't tell them they are a stupid screw-up, you grab them and say "Hey, I need you to stop making a mess, if you just stay with me, when we get home I will help you build a big tower of blocks and we can knock it down. This just isn't the place to push things over."
It's like redirecting the behavior rather than trying to eliminate it. That total internal world-view change has really affected my relationship with myself in a positive way.
Thank you so much for sharing, I really needed to read and learn this today! :)
Very helpful! I've been doing something like this recently, which has helped me a lot. I like your way of explaining it and I'll continue to develop my own way as well. Thank you!
Thank you ♥️
Thank you!!
Wow. This blew my mind a bit. Just wow 🤯. This makes so much sense.
you seemed so emotional when talking about the persecutor and im very proud of you to be able to talk about this with us, however i would like to remind you to be careful not to upset yourself! xx stay strong lovely 🌺
Couldn't have said it better! 😘
Your user name reminds me of the good ol' times of vine being alive. Sweet memory
It seems Kyle was co conscious on this video!
Yes I was thinking this too! Mostly after she mentioned him a few times.
It did sound a lot like a mixture of Chloe and Kyle's accent throughout the video. It became more stronger anytime Kyle was mentioned hehe
Yeah kinda
@@oopsy-daisy he's a cutie❤
Your videos are so educating. My friend has D.I.D and your videos help me understand what they have been through. It also helps me to understand how I can help them.
Animefansam 11 he's not alone, we aren't alone, I have D.I.D. too
JD S same
Please call me JD
@@jds9422 then change your name to J D
I don’t remember how to to change it 😅
Your ending really reminded me of my all-time favourite quote, which is from Harry Potter: "Of course it's happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it's not real?"
Thank you for sharing, Chloe x
Would love to see a collab between you and Jessica Kellgren-Fozard about your experiences with chronic fatigue.
AMNmrrll this would be interesting omg!! i hope we can see this
I think she would definitely have some great advice for the system. Plus, Jessica and DissociaDID are all lovely people and it would warm my heart to see them being supportive.
So many delightful british ladies in one video
Omg I would love this collab! And just talking about mental/physical disabilities in general! I love them both so much!
YES YES YESSSSS!!!!
Wow it’s so interesting how the more I watch you the more I can tell when it seems someone is close to the front. Like I always feel like I can hear Kyle when You start speaking on topics that you may need extra support or protection to get through it. Kyle you are an awesome protector. Keep it up 👍🏻
In a different video Kyle talked about how he always hovers close to the front while they're filming in case it ever gets to be too much. Its easy to see why hes the primary protector, hes always keeping an eye on things and looking out for the system :)
And yes please do a video on CFS! It also seems quite a poorly understood condition so would be brilliant
Hadassah Kraushar Yes! It’s so misunderstood and really hard when people your whole life don’t understand and call you lazy and make you feel worthless. When most of us already struggle and just wish to be able to live a “normal” active life. It can be isolating which on top of mental illness is hard. One of the only thing to help me is Makeup bc I can do it in the house and in bed.
@@Pink-qm9rp thank you for sharing - I hope you feel better soon x
Hadassah Kraushar Thank You ❤️
I have me/cfs and did as well and it's so good to see people like me on here and get to know how they deal with their life. ❤
Yes, a video on CFS would be great!
You seemed a bit upset when talking about your persecutor, I hope you're all doing okay and you didn't push yourselves too hard when filming this! Remember that you never need to include things or talk about them in detail if they make you uncomfortable, and please take your time filming these more emotionally taxing videos. I know you treat this as a job, but TH-cam is the kind of exhausting job you never truly get a break from, please don't be afraid to give yourself time to wind down and relax.
We absolutely wouldn't mind waiting a few extra days to give you the time needed for health and stability, especially on videos that bring up traumatic memories.
Take care of yourselves! 💕
I don’t think she sees producing content as a job. I think she views it as her purpose in life.
The bodies natural hair color is such a rich deep brown! Lovely! ^^
That's what I thought! If you "ignore" the peach locks it looks like Masculine™ Chloe! More Kyle to me.
I agree, it matches the body's eyebrows perfectly too. A whole new look.
@@brennak2053 that's exactly what I was thinking! I think the body would rock a pixie cut, and you can style one to be more masculine or feminine so it could help with some of the alters' dysmorphia
Kay_ Ck well of course it matches their eyebrows, you aren’t just born with eyebrows of one colour and head hair of a different colour lmao. All your hair is the same colour unless u dye it
Luka not always lol my sister has really dark brown eyebrows and light brown hair and my best friend is a ginger and has blonde eyebrows.
Recently we've been having recurring nightmares and when you started talking about the ones you had it kind of scared me because it's like oh my, I've had that exact experience. We've had the same nightmare recurring for 4 days and in all dreams it happened in the same building and the same thing happened. Over and over. We split twice because of those nightmares and had to take a week off school because it was too much to deal with. The nightmares were about a trauma that the host didn't know we even went through and so it really shocked and scared him when he started realising why he was dreaming about that happening. He's been denying us and our DID for so long and I think this is the thing that made it definite for him. These dreams felt so real and- (he kept saying things like "disgusting. Why would I even think that? Why would anyone do that? There's no way that happened. It's just a messed up dream. That can't happen to me") I'm an alter with -probably the most flashbacks, nightmares and PTSD in general, to be honest- in our system and I hate to see another alter or just a person having to relive and go through things like that. It's heartbreaking. Those nightmares happened last week and we're going to talk about them to a new therapist we're getting! (We're excited because the last therapists weren't too great) anyway thanks for reading. Also DissociaDID and anyone else reading this, I love you. You are important. You matter. You are loved. You can make a difference. You can get help. You are beautiful and unique. ❤💕 okay goodbye :)) - Percy
I'm curious -- do you (or any other alters) dream while NOT fronting in the body?
Also thank you so much for always being so vulnerable, Chloe. You deserve to keep private whatever it is you need, but the stories you are willing to share are extremely insightful and, at least for me, help me to have a much greater understanding of how it feels to live in your world. Much love
That is a interesting question
"Sleepwalking" and trying to jump out of a window because I was running from a bad guy was what took me to therapy. I had "sleptwalked" my whole life. Come to find out I have DID and my alters wake up and take over at night which looks like sleep walking.
I’d love to see a video about how you experience ME/CFS with your DID!
LizTheQueer so would i
This is kinda weird timing cuz last night in my dream I was walking along and I saw u, and I was gonna say hi Chloe but it didn’t quite seem like Chloe so I said “Hi are you DissociaDID?” Whoever was fronting said yes and we had a short conversation, then we both went our seperate ways and the dream continued.
It was just a normal dream for me but the fact that I woke up to see this vid is weird haha
Just here to say, I love these videos and I am loving this hair and makeup you are rocking today! You look beautiful! ❤
I needed to hear this. I have met alters in my dreams. The very first time I met an alter was actually in a dream and I was always afraid I was crazy or that people just don't meet alters like that. Thank you so much for this video - Jenny the host
This was the video I desperately needed because this is the only way I see the inner world and you explain it so well Chloe. Love you so much!
Thanks so much for sharing with us, I wish you all health safety and happiness.
Just wanted to say that I hate when ppl say it's 'all in your head' as if it's any less real...of course it's all in my head, that's where my brain is...I wouldn't tell someone that their broken arm is 'all in your arm' !?
Exactly!
You said when you were lucid dreaming if you've realized you're having a nightmare you could wake yourself up, i wonder if that is also your system being protective without realization. I understand that everyone in the system has their own dreams but since you have met alters before in dreams could it be that your lucid dreaming stages were also there for an instinctive need to protect the system may be? It just made me curious i don't know if you've ever talked about it with the other alters about it so may be you have idk.
When I was editing I was actually wondering if someone else was waking the body up because they could sense my distress or the nightmare was getting too close to a trauma memory I wasnt ready to see xxx
I know this is a late reply, but I just wanted to put in the fact that I can do this too. I was having a nightmare once (it was a lucid dream-so maybe that explains it), and the people in it were telling me to “wake up”. So, I did. I’ve done this with other dreams as well-just thought I might put it in here. :)
Edit: I don’t have D.I.D. by the way, no offense, just clarifying. 😅
@@lackluster_lancer that happens to me to
B L U E P R I N T my lucid dream was weirder. I tried explaining to the dream people that it was a dream. So I tried something I’d heard a TH-camr say a long time ago. I shot fireballs out of my mouth. It worked. Idk either ._.
This situation happened to our host, and so this video unfortunately was lightly triggering. We didn’t think any other systems experienced it! Thank you for being so open and honest with us all, you are all so brave! -Ash
This is literally the most informative channel on TH-cam. I'm learning so much from you all
Dream biology and psychology and purpose is fascinating, but with DID in the mix, it just proves that it is something way more complex than even we realise. It takes the idea of a conscious and subconscious mind so much deeper
Been waiting for this, I know it was hard for you to film, we all love and appreciate you all and hope you're okay❤
the martyr-like personality bit really got me because that's something i also struggle with now... thank you for a great video as always
Can I just say before watching, that I’m so happy you could edit and push through today and post! Thank you for taking the time even though this was very triggering and draining for you! Now going to watch, but just a pre-thank you!
I find this interesting because I don't dream. Perhaps it's alters fronting during that time to protect me from what my dreams are about. Could you do a video on protectors and prosecutors? In my younger days I made the mistake of trying to restrain my protector and he turned into a prosecutor which lead to legal troubles because in a violent environment like prison and jail he had full control. I'm receiving therapy but it's hard to find a so called "specialist ". In fact I've spent most my life trying to get help only to be met with disbelief. Luckily now I have a therapy team that is trying to learn together with me my alters and even my ex wife but now we still struggle with making him a protector again after all the physical and mental abuse he has given not only those around us but ourselves as well.
Finally! I binge watched your channel in three days and have been looking for more content from the Dissociadid System!
The Curvy Cuban Ahhh! Aren’t they the best?!!
If you’re new and wondering, Chloe uploads a new video every Sunday!
Christian F. Yes, when I ran out of vids, I moved on to Piñata and System K and Multiplicity and Me, and then Entropy,
Thank you, thank you, thank you! For this video! We've had dreams of each other and with each other, you are the first person to validate our dreaming experiences. Everyone else we've talked to about this has said it does not happen with them or that they've never heard of it happening, i was beginning to think we were the only one to have such dreams. I've met three alters for the first time in a dream and I've had nightmares orchestrated by a persecutor! Those are the worst because they do know you so well, your strengths, your weaknesses and your greatest fears!
Quick question... can alters be animals as well? A speaking animal..
All I kept thinking whilst watching this is how much a black pixie hair cut would suit you 🙈
I thought the exact same thing throughout the whole video!!
Oh yeah
If I remember correctly, Kyle had that thought before too and just decided to do it. Looked really good, too
:same:
Same
You're so mature Chloe, you really make a lot of us believe in recovery (Knowing it is a constant job). You're all making a difference with this channel.
Btw, your black hair looks AMAZING
I love love Soul Eaters so much. I never really though about how profound it is to DID. The characters needed to work really well with their weapons which could be seen as alters. That scene where Soul is talking to this trickster who wants to take over his system by tricking him irt Maka just brought a lot more perspective.
I've watched so many of these videos now, that the intro music is like an automatic brain signal like "relax, smile, everything's going to be fine"
Thank you so much for all your videos!! It really helped us a lot!! We hope that you all have a lovely day, and remain happy!! - The Mirrored System
Hey, I noticed you called your system the "mirrored" system. How did you come up with that ?? How do systems get names ?? Don't answer if you aren't comfortable, I was just wondering 😊
@@alannahseaton6483 i wondered that too
@@alannahseaton6483 We came up with our system name because in the inner world lots of us were found in one of those hall of mirrors places you find in carnivals! We aren't all that creative with naming the system
I can’t watch videos longer than 5 minutes because I have the attention span of a 5 year old but this is the first channel where I watch the entire video
This was a great video, very put together. Funnily enough, our next video for next week is going to cover DID and sleep/ dreaming. Guess great minds think alike 😊.
-Kit
I am the host for the former @Kesha Rhinestone system and as a Brit living in Long Beach who grew up in Wembley Park in the London area and even though the body has never been to London, we're still on UK time and wide awake at 3:42 in the morning California time after 4 hours of sleep from 4am to 8am UK time.
We just ate lunch and now going down for an afternoon nap with it being quarter til noon and pitch black (or might as well be based on circadian rhythm)
Thank you for the sleep tip. This is now Nadia. I'm a 25 year old mum with a one year old going for a nap for Isabelle's system. It's just after 12 noon and pitch black because the body's in California even though I'm in London.
I’m glad you posted this, we all really appreciate you guys. We know that this video turned out to be hard to film.
Past that, please keep your system health and safety in mind. Take as much time as you need to do the things you wish to do. 💕💕💕💕
I love you all so much. I found your channel last week, and I have three things to say: I have a crush on Kyle, please make a CFS video, and THANK YOU TIMES 10000 FOR EVERYTHING YOU ARE DOING FOR THE DID AND MENTAL HEALTH COMMUNITIES. All of you are changing this world for the better.
Hi Chloe :-) So glad you got this up on time - can't wait to see it so thank you!
Really appreciate all you do to inform and educate us (I don't have DID but since starting to watch your channel I have become fascinated and think what you do is awesome! It has really made me much more aware.) Enjoy the rest of your day and look after yourself! Love from London xxx
I dream like that. I dream in 3rd person 90% of the time and I think of it like that too watching someone else play a video game I usually just stay and watch it play out bc it interests me. I don't push it to be something else. I switch from being first person to third person throughout the night. Has anyone else without DID experienced this too?...and often dreams I remember I think of it like there's 2 of me .
I don't have DID and the vast majority of my dreams are in first person, but I have had dreams in the third person before. I know I've had some that felt like playing video games, and one in particular was like watching a movie. During some movie scenes I was watching it, and in others I was one of the characters in first person. I had written that dream down in my dream journal so I'm pretty sure that's how it played out.
I don't think I've ever had a lucid dream in the third person, but I totally get just going with the flow of a dream to see what happens next.
You are such a trooper :) I hope you all continue to stay safe. Thank you for posting these videos as I’m learning more and more about D.I.D. It definitely changed my perspective on things :) also, I’m really happy for you and Nan
I know some of you are hesitant to share personal stuff so i just wanted to say thanks for that. I'm looking forward to knowing more of you. take care
While she explaining the dreams in my mind I imagined them waking up and having conversation like "did you see Kyle's dream last night? It was SOO weird" and then a different alter is like "yeah that was weird" a different alter: "I didn't see it what happened?" 😂😂😂 I don't even know
I absolutely LOVE your makeup. Honestly you're an icon haha
You looked so exhausted by the end of this, but good job! Now take care and focus on yourselves 💕hope you have a great day
Hey, I know this is an old video, but I was amazed listening to your description of the character you had nightmares about. I had nightmares about a character exactly like that, shape shifting and everything, except mine was a fox. Then I also had a one dream where I managed to defeat it and didn't dream about it since. I also have CPTSD and high level dissociation after childhood trauma - I just wanted to say this incase you see it so you know you're not alone x
wow this is really interesting. i've never considered what would happen in the mind of someone with DID when they were dreaming. thank you for sharing your experience
This is kinda appropriate because you’re talking about dreaming! I get really (really) bad sleep paralysis at time and usually it’s a horrible experience, grim hallucinations and the like, and it can go on for maybe ten minutes or so. I often nap while listening to TH-cam or podcasts, and a few days ago I fell asleep and had a really bad sleep paralysis attack while listening to your video (I think it was the one about your littles). This was the first time I’ve had sleep paralysis and and not had a horrific time, instead of having a panic attack or anything else like that I just chilled out and listened to you educating me about DID until I could move again, so thank you for that! That’s never happened before, usually when I’m listening to something while having an attack it makes it even worse, but for some reason your video didn’t do that! Thank you for all your amazing content :)
We have someone who really really really struggles with sleep & we've literally wound up hospitalized for the insomnia in the past. Acknowledging her, listening to her and her fears/needs/etc., and being able to communicate with her some has helped tremendously with the insomnia. It doesn't help that she refuses to acknowledge that "any of this is real," though.
“The body” I love how in control they seem. I understand it’s hard and that they cannot control everything that is happening, but they seem so good at communicating and working together
I just wanted to let you know how much I love your videos. My girlfriend has DID (self diagnosed atm but is planning to go to a professional soon) and before I met her I didn’t know that something like DID even existed. She gave me a rundown of what it was but I was still kind of confused and skeptical, but as soon as I found your videos it all started to really make sense and help me to understand who she is and how to help and and her system. So thank you so much and keep up the good work. But don’t overwork yourself. 😊
literally two days after posting this we broke up because it was long distance and the host of their system asked out a girl in their town so oof. luckily we still on good terms but like wow that timing could not have been worse.
Please take good care of yourselves ! I know this video was particularly hard for you and I really hope you didn’t push yourselves too far for our sake. Lots of love !
15 years of struggling, YOUR videos have helped me massively with taking my fist step to getting help. I know I have ‘aulters’ but will not claim any disorder without a medical diagnosis. Massive thank you 🙏. You made some disturbing thoughts and realities into something that doesn’t seem so ‘odd’ (wrong wording but) just thanks 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
At 11:25 onwards, I almost started crying, I understand the feeling of not having any worth so strongly, I am still going through those feelings and my counselor is currently trying to help me, it makes it seem so much more real when you hear someone else say exactly how you feel
I have been able to acknowledge I am in a nightmare and forcefully wake myself up since I was a child. It is only with nightmares, never normal dreams. And it's always been really interesting to me I hadn't met another person who could - so hearing that there was a period of time where you could do that makes me feel...I'm not sure the word for it. A synonym for validated, but I guess it also isn't really validation. Just..nice.
I don't have DID, but my dreams have always played a very heavy roll in displaying emotions I wasn't processing. For the longest time, though, I wasn't aware of what any of them meant. I'm very detached from my emotions, so everything was finding it's way into my dreams. And a lot of it was very scary.
Your nightmares must have been so terrifying, but I'm glad you were able to learn what you needed to from them to better yourself.
Cryptic Luna I used to have tons of nightmares as a child, and I did this quite often. I don’t really do it anymore, as I almost never have nightmares now. It’s quite a bizarre skill to have, isn’t it? But super useful to protect your mind as a kiddo.
@@heymickeyheyhey Definitely. Strangely enough, I just learned my older brother has also been able to do it. It's interesting, for sure.
I can never thank you enough for your videos. At first it was just curiosity and education. And now this one brought so much needed knowledge. It's 3am i had a terrifying dream that felt so real I couldn't bring myself to look around my room even I just immediately grabbed my phone to watch your videos. You have a calming voice and are so articulate and strong I feel courage from all you've gone through. I realllyyy don't think I have DID, but I've been working on IFS (Internal family system) with my therapist and there are definitely 'parts' I've discovered with ages, and appearances but (So far?) No name or role knowledge... as far as I know no one fronts and I have no amnesia...I know this is an old video and my comment is super long but I was genuinely terrified of my dream just now I felt everything and I have had lucid dreaming of an inner world since I was a child and I can't close my eyes right now without going right back so I'm awake watching your videos ❤
Once again, all my alters enjoyed this video so much!’ Sorry were a little late chimpz has been stressing over the boat tomorrow as we have strong winds ahhh, love your videos and channel Chloe!
This reminds me of how our core met Silva, one of the protectors. She was dreaming of a deep, dark cave that appeared to have no end, and the light of Silva's wings (she's a faery) led her back to the light. She presented herself at this point because our core had lost her childhood friend to the dreaded S word (I don't want to inadvertently trigger someone) and had decided to give up on writing and creative outlets in the pursuit of her own self-destruction. Silva is a creative, free-spirited alter, and she convinced our core not to give up on her dreams.
Thank you for sharing your story, Chloe. It must have taken a tremendous amount of courage to face that memory again. Thank you.
Since I started following this channel I always had that question. So thanks for answering it! ❤
Ps: I love your hair and make up
This could not have come at a better time!!! Last night, a couple of us were dreaming, and got the chance to look in a mirror within one of our dreams. Saw a person who looks very different from the body (an alter I as a host met for the first time). Our dreams were incredibly vivid and immersive and our memory about those dreams is VERY good. Near total recall. And I’m personally used to seeing rapid and drastic changes of dreams, but our dreams have gotten to a new level of different for us recently. Wonderful to hear your perspective and experience, and it’s informative and affirming as always. Thank you!
I'm so excited!!! You all have taught me so much about DID and I love watching your videos and it's inspired me to want to learn more about DID and other misunderstood/mental illnesses that have many misconceptions with them
It's very interesting how you described how Demon used your dreams to teach you a lesson. I don't have DID, but I've definitely had reoccurring dreams with characters that seem to be trying to push me in one direction or another, or even provide something I've been craving but in a less than ideal manner. I do have other mental and physical disorders (my body and brain don't seem to get along very well). It's really nice to hear someone else talk about those kinds of dreams! Brains are weird, man.
Love you and your system Chloe! Thank you for sharing. You are so brave and strong for getting through this like you did. You are an inspiration to us all 🥰😘
I love that you point out that just because something is happening in your mind doesn't mean it's not "real"! As you said, the brain is an organ as real as any other body part. I deal with a few mental illnesses in my life, and the attitude that it's not "real" has always infuriated me. Thanks for your videos. I have been watching your videos, along with those of others in the DID TH-cam community, for a few months now, and I've found them very educational. What used to seem like a strange illness now makes so much sense to me.
I appreciate a lot that you filmed this video, it was very brave of you and I know talking about it must have been difficult. Thank you for helping us understand how dreaming works and what a persecutor is. What you guys do is awesome!❤️
One of my littles came to me in a dream. She came right up to my face, placed her hands on my cheeks and said 'if you were more childlike we could be friends'. It was a very powerful experience.
Was Kyle co-conscious during this? thought i heard your accent changing around 07:28
You teach me so much every time you post a video, your so strong just by talking about this, and (from a diff video) I agree with jade how this could be very dangerous due to people who take advantage of people. And I'm so surprised that you talk about this. But thank you so much for teaching us. Thank you all of you from me!(I love all of you guys)
- great explanation
- great video, I've been kinda wondering
- great make up
- I want to hug you
I don't know anyone with DID but you have opened my eyes to a fascinating and scary world. I really appreciate your extremely open and honest content that allows people like me a window into the life you lead. You are so strong and beautiful and I hope you know there are so many strangers out there that admire you. Thank you to your entire system for allowing the world a peak inside your mind.
It is the first time I am THIS early! Much Love from Brazil.
I was watching one of my fictive alters' dreams once without realizing it. I've also met him several times in dreams. He's dedicated to keeping my health from failing completely and making sure that I know I'm loved. He's often forced me to go to sleep when I have insomnia.
Just like you I used to be able to realize I was dreaming sometimes and change nightmares into something less scary.
interesting stuff as always. I'm really glad I found your channel otherwise I'd have taken Split or Criminal Minds or anything like that and assumed that's what DID is. I was going to say I hope youre okay but that sounds a bit silly, so I hope that your youtube and DID community can make you feel safer. (not that that doesn't sound even sillier.) you're doing some really fanatics stuff.
I love how much I get out of these videos even tho I do not have DID. I have OCD/anxiety/depression and tend to ruminate over thoughts and put a lot of guilt on myself. The part about being a martyr really resonated with me. I tend to strive to be my best and am really hard on myself/put myself last. I am realizing that it is not always good to be that way.
I would love a video about your CFS, how you were diagnosed and what symptoms you presented early on. I’ve been wondering lately if I have it (a not so terrible case compared to some people). So info on that would be interesting and also informative!
As to the dreams, I’m very proud of you for even speaking on the topic. I know this video had some repercussions in the system so thank you for sharing.💕
This helps me feel valid. This is all very new and super scary for me. I was asleep but not completely and i had an alter who hold anger just yell and get in my face and then i fell asleep and dreamed. But she introduced herself and it felt so real.
This whole thing is a huge struggle and something i wasn't prepared for at all. I feel like ive lived my whole life losing time and being so out of it and when i hunted down an answer i got the worst gift in the world.
What you're doing here is fantastic. I'm always in awe when people expose themselves completely. Great work.
I have CFS too and would certainly appreciate more awareness spread for it. There's still stigma for that, even from members of my family, and it's simply unjustified when it's a clinical diagnosis. It is so hard for me to treat, various meds have horrible side effects, and even got a death threat for "laziness" once. I'll never forget it.
People could learn better. There's opportunity to know better. They don't have to feel desperate about someone being different. I didn't get a choice.
Thankyou for the conversation as always. You are simply a beautiful person and you are very much worth loving yourself and selves. It's selfcare. *hugs*
i have been looking forward to this video for sooooo loonggggg. thank you so much and i hope you are all doing ok ❤️
Intense. Far out. YOU ARE THE STRONGEST PERSON I'VE EVER COME TO KNOW
I am mind blown eeeevery time! Thank you so much Chloe. And I am sending love to the whole system. ♡
this, for some of us, explains the ability of 'lucid dreaming' which i have been always do - and oh, my - you just mentioned that . ! ! And thank you for that bit about the importance of communication all the time for a good life - this is what IFS and my doctor believes - to honour all and alway s keep communication going as much as possible. Oh, i hate those dreams that feel like you are awake and can't wake up
HELLO!! Omg this is the earliest ive been for a video by you guys! This is such an interesting question so im excited to watch
I know he was scary but I'm so proud of your bravery to face him. Your system is stronger now then it ever was before so I hope this time you have other alters by your side if he shows up.
great video sweetie. You can tell this was hard for you to talk about, thank you for sharing with us.
We tagged you in a tweet on twitter which will hopefully cheer you up.
big hugs
Honestly, I'm working on getting a diagnosis for OSDD, and the longer that passes the more confused I get. I had a dream last night of a very kind but apathetic person named literally just 'orange person' and I'm struggling to find out if she was an alter or not.
I just have to say, though, your videos make my entire week so much better. I'm always looking forward to them simply because of how amazing they are. ^^ Thanks you so much for helping people understand about DID and OSDD. You're one of the bravest people here on youtube. My communication with everyone has been sucky lately, but I know that most of them see you as a person who helped us as well as inform us. I can't express my gratitude enough.
Crazy interesting as always !
Thank you for sharing your experiences and knowledge with us ♥️
Thank you so much for telling us your story with meeting a persecutor in a dream. I think we can all tell how much strength that took you to talk about. I’m so proud of you! When you were talking about not allowing yourself to live purely as a martyr, that really hit home for me. Love to all the alters! Hope you have some good night sleeps and beautiful days in the future 💕
A lot of the stuff you said also relates to my system. I as well have also met a persecutor through a dream and it was the most realistic dream I ever had and it was so frightening. Fortunately for me that was a bit ago and that situation has been delt with but thank you for sharing your story and keep up the good work! Also I do have a suggestion for a video, is it okay if you talk about naming systems? My system is still in need of a name and maybe you could give us some inspiration or ideas on how we can get that name. Anyway, love you so much! Don't stop what you're doing! ❤
These videos have helped me identify my own struggles with DID and they’ve finally given me the insensitive to actually see a therapist and tell them what’s wrong for once, ily all!!