Why can’t you turn her over to the state? She’s literally running the house and she does what she wants, no one should have to deal with this while pregnant
Because legally it would also impact if they get to keep their baby. It makes them look like bad guardians and it makes it so the state can step in and take their baby as well.
I gave up my bad ass daughter to the state and still had custody of my other children. Took her to the office dropped her off to them and left. Screw that.
My bio dad was like that, instead of like the op's sister being raised to be like op it was more like to replace me as I'm a girl and he wanted a boy so later when my mom divorced him when I was 11, he got a son with his ap a 6yr old son at that time...
THANK YOU. I have BPD with bipolar comorbid. there are four types one can be manipulative and attention seeking, but the other three types are basically self destructive, impulsive and petty shit. don't get me wrong BPD can have sociopathic behavior patterns but most of us are not. education is so important as BPD is literally more stigmatized than antisocial personality disorder (sociopathy) and narcissistic who often go out of their way to wreck others lives and feel zero empathy. BPD feels a lot. we overfeel. our cope is self destruct.
@PandoraBear357 which is the weird irony of this. I was told the same thing. "oh we don't want to label you" you mean get me a proper diagnosis so we can manage treatment properly and so I don't suffer for the next ten years of my life before getting to proper care with therapy and meds? oh yes, they absolutely will do this. it's fuckin WILD how garbage some doctors are. I have medical ptsd across the board from shit like not addressing mental illness to not wanting to remove my tonsils though it was clear it needed to happen (and the ENT wrote on my chart I was a chronic factitious even after he removed them and admitted in front of my family that they were in fact bad, badly infected tonsils). they also did an MRI of my spine to figure out my chronic pain (but skipped the dye for the nerves, which, guess what, it was squished nerves and nerve damage). I went somewhere else did a second MRI guess what they found immediately because they actually used the dye? If you guessed nerve damage from my c2 down to my c7 then here's a candy and 800 jeopardy points
OP's a kind person, and it says a lot she feels bad for wanting the sister gone. But alas, that girl needs to go. You can't keep trying to fix someone who doesn't want to be fixed.
It’s so sad that OP does want to legitimately help her sister, but I think in my opinion, the parents either didn’t care or they just did the bare minimum to the point where they just clothed her and fed her, but didn’t bother about showing her to wash or take care of herself I think they just said here’s a sandwich bye and that’s it.
That kid is literally the antichrist and there's no convincing me otherwise, the dad was fucked in raising her and now she's an absolute monster, if OP should be mad at anyone, it's the dad
OP’s sister is a sociopath. Also, I don’t know how OP did not give up her to the state. After all of the Hell she put them through. The sister has not suffered ANY consequences for any of the lies, stealing, lack of hygiene, and animal abuse.
Part of it is the fact that since this is written after it all, the sister was manipulating them to the point that the insanity of it became a “normal”
I came here to say this same thing. The way that the half sister consistently ignores animals to the point of health hazards, and then asks if she forgot they existed is not absent-mindedness, it's malicious negligence. And that's not even taking into account how this kid does not seem to derive enjoyment out of anything aside from lying.
It could be cuz her sister’s therapist was an idiot at noticing the signs of BPD and actually praised her instead of providing solid evidence that she is a sociopath. Also OP and her husband are both idiots for never recording how she kept her room and lied about them to her therapist. All OP had to do is keep catching or recording her sister, lying all the time. So that OP can provide the evidence to the state or mental asylum to get the sister out of her house🤷♀️
Surely the girl qualifies as needing to be committed, right? It can't be any more expensive than paying for all that therapy, dental work, and exterminators (and whatever a hazmat cleaning service goes for). Tell the therapist that she's a danger to herself and others, and that you can't adequately care for her with her current mental state, and GET HER OUT OF YOUR HOUSE.
Ah op made a big mistake, if op kicking girl out after she is 18, then don’t get a new house before op do that. So even she tried to retaliate and come back, she can’t find op. Now stuck with new house with potential jeopardize with retaliation and ruining the house.
YOU WANT TO HAVE HER AROUND YOUR BABY?!! A BABY THAT CAN'T DEFEND ITSELF?!! TAKE HER TO A POLICE STATION WITH THE PAPERWORK, MAYBE IN ANOTHER STATE. You'll have to sleep DONT keep her in your house when the baby arrives. She will see the baby as a problem that she needs to get rid of.
1st Story She seems like she has anti-social personality traits. She lies easily, never takes responsibility for her actions, selfish, narcissistic, cruel to animals. This child is dangerous I would sleep with my bedroom door locked.
That's not anti-social. Anti-social traits would be like never leaving the house, never wanting to meet new ppl, being ok with never talking to ppl etc. I've been suspected to have schizoid or anti-social and it's not like op's sister. The therapists are right that its probably borderline and/or sociopathy.
@@She_Sordid You need to find a new psychologist then. What you are describing is called being asocial, anti-social disorders are a completely different thing and so is antisocial behavior (which is an entirely different but related third thing).
@@2XocraM Me: Says something my psychologist told me without quoting word for word and said it to the best of my ability without being a psychologist You: Get a new one
If all you have to do is tell the doctor you're being coorced to donate an organ will make you illegible to donate. No way would kidnapping to force a surgocy be legal.
I like how she said "my husband is deathly allergic, I'm terrified of them and it broke our lease" in one sentence and somehow she still thought it was ok 😂😂
@@OnePunchKirby That was quite the statement. I don't know about you,but there's no way an animal/bug is coming into my house that I am scared of or just don't like.
Never let somebody live in your house, especially if they have made it clear that they have it out for you. Traumatic upbringing or not, the half-sister is a manipulative, destructive thief. The more comfortable she gets with sabotaging OP's life, it will only be a matter of time before she does something that completely crosses the line, especially for somebody who obviously has no sense of boundaries.
You shouldn't feel obligated to house an A-hole parents' affair child. Especially if that child has expressed animosity towards you. This girl should have been in therapy long ago but it's far late for that. The longer she stays the more grief she'll cause towards op and ops loved ones.
Your husband, your baby, your pets aren’t safe with her there. This is so scary because she is capable of harming anyone at this point. Stop worrying about looking like a “bad” person and worry about the safety of your family and the damage to your new home.
OP: "clearly, I am incredibly naive and easy to fool", "I'm an idiot" Damn, bruh, you have no idea 🗿 Why's that demon still not in the foster system yet? Does OP not value her child's life? 👀 We already see that her and her husband's lives mean nothing to OP OP's like "OMG, I dragged a monster from hell and couldn't make a sweet kitty out of it 😫, I'm so guilty I failed her". This pisses me off like SO MUCH
An old guy ik used to say that you are the creator of your own downfall and it couldn't be any further from OP's situation. My opinion would've been to not take her in in the first place. I feel sorry for the husband not OP. Literally man deserves a better partner.
I know you said that social services won’t help you but call CPS state what she’s doing and tell them how she’s going to create a bad environment for your three month old child. Tell them that she’s not mentally stable because clearly somethings wrong with her.
Eventually you stop feeling bad for OP because she allows it to keep happening. At this point her best option is to give up custody or put her in an institution now because otherwise she will lose her husband and her new baby because the sister cannot be around them and they cannot wait 2 more years. There seem to be no consequences for the sister and she is allowed to do whatever she wants. Also the fact that they refuse to properly diagnose/treat her because "she's too young" is ridiculous at this point imo. She's 16, not 6, and clearly needs help.
As a former foster parent I can say that OP is enabling so much of this girl’s behavior to the point that she’s allowing her to wreck her life with very little consequences. She’s too old for her to put up with any of this regardless of her past. She needs very real life consequences for her actions *every*single*time that she pulls something. And why she isn’t on meds just because she’s a teenager is beyond comprehension. She needs to be medicated properly if she’s bipolar/borderline because her brain literally can’t function properly without medication. I had a friend diagnosed with this as well as a mother that I could bet the bank also has it. Her behavior is “very” much like my diagnosed friend’s behavior. Like spot on. Life will NEVER get any easier until she’s got a decent doctor working to level out the brain chemicals that are out of balance in that girl. My friend, off her bipolar meds, was like a whole different nonfunctional person. Wildly unstable and quite able to do real damage to people. On it? So so SO much better on her meds. Normal. So yeah this girl would be put on proper meds and on extremely limited privileges until she complied without fail just like they do in residential treatment homes for kids who can’t live in normal homes/families. You have to earn every right that you want without fail in those places. Want a privilege? You go take that shower or “no deal”. You don’t get a THING (other than basic necessities/food) without earning that right. Only good compliant behavior gets you anything extra. Structure and routine is so important to people like this until they learn how to function in normal society. They need rules and boundaries at every turn in order to turn their lives around and lead a better existence.
Well, think about the way the texts sounded: “You will stay with us, so that we Know where you are.” “You Will do this.” CS is not taking “NO” for an answer. Especially not after being told no by their other sisters. (Not to mention she got her, her other sister’s and OP’s MOM side with her on this!) They sound like a crazy person ready to take someone against their will by any means necessary. (Kidnapping) And who knows what lengths a person like that might go to accomplish their goal? Those lengths might endanger not only OP, but her fiancé and children as well. Also, there are people who are emotionally fragile, so OP might’ve thought she was in danger in this situation. (Which I could see that being a possibility for this.) In the choice of “Fight or Flight”, OP chose Flight thinking about protecting her family from something that could’ve escalated quickly. (They could’ve called the police if CS or their mom showed up, but then again like I said before, things could’ve gotten bad before the police got there.)
that is way more akin to antisocial personality disorder than BPD. there are four types, and while one can be manipulative, the other three are petty, self destructive, and impulsice behavior that generally does more harm to ourselves than others (and everyone understandably gets sick of being along for the ride). there are tools to help manage symptoms. DBT, CBT, and a good psychiatrist for medications have helped me so much as a BPD bipolar.
OP’s dad cheated on her mom and had OP’s half sister with another woman. But the dad tried to make the half sister just like OP which caused her to hate Op. Years later OP had to take in her sister because both of the parents abandoned her, but her sister is a demon around her and OP’s husband. She never cleaned her room,(She put pads and trash in her drawers) never washed herself, doesn’t take care of the pets (bought a bunny even though OP’s husband is allergic to it), and is overall a terrible person, but no one believes OP about her sister because everyone thinks she’s nice. 2 years later OP can’t get rid of her because she took her in too quickly and OP just had a baby and she’s worried for him.
I remember my aunt (shes an former addict but has similar behaviors) had a hygiene issue like this girl and my cousin who has the same family nickname as her made her sit in the tub fully clothed then sprayed her with dishsoap and a hose and scrubbed at her with a body brush then washed her mouth with a bar of soap. I don't approve of that method, but It worked and there were no more issues after that.
Just a small note, rabbits are NOT rodents, they are lagomorphs. Interestingly, if people have an allergic reaction to rabbits, it’s usually due to a protein in their saliva. When a child is cruel to animals, it’s a major warning sign that should never be ignored. I can’t believe they ever left any pets in her care after how she treated her rabbit. There is no way in hell I would have her living in my home with any other children, especially children too young to verbalize anything she might do to them. That baby is going to be abused in some way, possibly even killed if they allow her to stay in their home.
Bruh, the husband should divorce and seek full custody of the baby with no visitation rights. But then again, he's probably the same idiot as the op, otherwise he would have already put his foot down.
That sounds like narcissistic behavior, if I was you pit cameras all around the house inside and out without her knowing make sure they are small and unnoticeable get evidence then take it to the therapist and have her committed period.
So ops sister saw how shes living and rhought i want to live like this and lied about her abuses and shit from her parents her parents gave her to op without hesitation because theyve been dealing with ops sis and dont wanna anymore. She was abandoned on op because of ops sis bpd
Some kids are a lost cause because it is not bad to say, it is just facts. If you arent able to come to terms with this then you will allow that lost cause to ruin your life.
Go to a foreign country that doesn’t speak English take her passport in the middle of the night and fly home change your phone number and move to a different state then change your last names or send her to a trouble teen camp and refuse to take her back
Thank you for sharing your story. It sounds incredibly challenging, and I admire your strength and patience. Have you considered involving a professional mediator to help navigate these complex family dynamics? What do you think could be improved in handling such situations?
Second Story; NOT the Ah! Tell your Sister that if Your Eggs are 'Her DNA Anyways' than WHY CANT YALLS MOTHER EGGS DO?! oh Bc is that JUST LIKE raising a SIBLING and NOT a Paternal Child?! Is THAT why? ORR is it 'just gross, eww no why would I use Mums Eggs instead, That's NOT the Same" BULLSH. Bc for REAL, if it's 'Just Eggs and Similar Enough Dna' that the Sister wants in order for a Biological related Child, than ASK and GET IT FROM THE MAMA, NOT your Own Sister! Problem Solved.
Idk I've always believed that you should be able to relinquish ANY child to the state without consequences because what's the alternative? That the kid stays in a home with parent(s) who hate them? Yea I'm sure that'll be great & no issues will arise from that whatsoever. Some people don't realize until the kid is born that they hate kids. Some people have a severe decline in circumstances, whether it be mental or financial. If someone is overwhelmed & knows they are incapable of parenting a child, we should want there to be options for them to take & that they will take because it won't ruin their entire life to use that option so the child isn't harmed by that parent. This should be common sense but unfortunately the US isn't great at using any common sense whatsoever. We do things based on punishment & feelings. It sure is going awesome so far lol.
Our family has been taking in kids from fostercare for decades and OPs kid does sound exactly like some of the kids we had here. Three of them were exactly like that, to the extreme with the lying and manipulating, even to the point where it became dangerous. These kids should have never been placed in foster homes, but it's very hard to figure that out beforhand if parents are either not aware of their kid being like that (one of them was smart enough to make it look like their brother was the unhinged one) or if they come from an abusive home and have been taken out by cps and still have to be evaluated, but usually they need an emergency place to stay immediately, which will often be with a foster family. We would have both long-term placings as well as emergency placings in which they will stay a maximum of 3 months (all of this is in the Netherlands btw) Anyway, those three kids shouldn't have been placed with a family and afterwards all three were eventually placed in a 24/7 surveillance facility. One of them didn't go there immediately, but was placed in another facility, also with a high alert level of care, but not as strict and structured as a 24/7 surveillance one. She tried to burn that place down. (One of the reasons they shouldn't have been in foster families, this is something healthcare professionals should be handling) After that she was obviously moved immediately. From what OP is telling us, I'm certain the kid belongs in a 24/7 facility, especially because of the lying, as healthcare workers can be bamboozled quite easily when those kids aren't under camera observation, as they work in shifts and manipulative kids like that will exploit the gaps within the transitions between shifts and they will know exactly were the gaps are when it comes to the workers sharing information. We've seen one such place which wasnt a very strict place, basically just for kids that were transitioning to adulthood and going to a group home afterwards as they were mentally impaired and therefor not able to be living alone. Anyway, this kid had just lost her dad and her manipulative mom saw a gap to come waltzing back into the girls life and basically destroy it, by feeding her lies. She wanted to get her out of the group home, but didn't have authority to do so. So she had the kid come up with lies of being abused by her former foster family, the kid starts telling these lies to the healthcare workers at her grouphome, whom blindly believe her and never even tried to go into a deeper conversation to figure out whether she was telling the truth or not. Which would have been ridiculously easy as this girl was mentally impaired and could've never kept her story straight for too long as it was lies fed to her by her mother. As they believed her the case was escalated to the police and foster organizations. The former foster parents were kept in the dark and the foster organizations they worked with instantly dropped their support, even though this family had been fostering for over 20 years I believe at that point and had always had perfect remarks and evaluations by all organizations and other professionals involved. But no one even bothered to look a little further into the stories before duping those foster parents like that. Absolutely abhorrent. And these are the dangers they won't warn you about when training to become a foster parent. (You need to do a 2 year course to get licensed to be a foster parent) Which to me is bonkers, as it is a very real danger, since there will always be parents angry about their kids being taken from them and they will be looking for someone to blame and take revenge on. They can't really do that to the governments foster organization, so they will come for the foster parents. So when it comes to being a foster parent, better have your ducks in a row and always be able to proove you were never alone or inappropriate with a kid of the opposite sex. Luckily those foster parents were able to proove that and with only a few questions the police had already determined the kid was a liar. However the mother took it a step further by telling some friends or acquaintances and this led to that poor foster family being harrassed publicly on Facebook. And you know how these things go, people will have an opinion instantly. One of these friends was even messaging the son in law to keep his kids from their grandparents. 😮 luckily he knew about the ordeal and blocked this woman, but jot before telling her to better check who's lies she's believing and putting herself on the line for.. allthough there isnt really a way to get through to people like that. Luckily the family didn't have Facebook accounts themselves, the harassing happened on their kids pages and they had to promptly delete all family pictures or put them to private, as that was what these people were commenting under. OP is only in her early 20s, and was clearly bamboozled into adopting this kid, but there must be a way to undo this. Do it quickly and have the kid sent to one of these observation facilities, they might be able to help and also keep her off the streets once she turns 18 and keep her under observation as she's not capable of doing normal human things at the moment. This is a problem for the experienced professionals.
The sister in the first story is absolutely terrible, she's undeniably conniving and evil, seriously she makes Eric Cartman from South Park look like an angel in comparison
Story 1: OP'S father is a piece of shit, the reason his daughter is like that is because of him and when he should've stepped up he ran away. It's a shame OP had to step up for her father, especially since she probably did so out of guilt😔
Question? You stated you had her for the pass 2 years from the time she was 16?do you live in the states bc if you do... We now know she's playing head games. She is now 18 which for us is considered an adult. Give her 30day notice to find somewhere else to live. Then change your locks
First story: I'm in the process of adopting a kid from foster care. You always hear awful stories about foster families, but my son was in close to a dozen and only has one horror story. (transphobic little old lady that insisted on treating him like a girl, it sucked but wasn't SA, physical abuse or murder) CPS and foster families are, on balance, heroes. They are way better equipped to deal with OP's sister. If OP hasn't already kicked her sister out, she needs to call CPS and terminate her custody. Sister's behavior is unfair to OP and her family, and OP's inability to give sister whatever it is she needs isn't fair to her either. I can't guarantee that "the system" will be able to help sister, but it stands a better chance, and won't destroy OP's life as well.
Why can’t you turn her over to the state? She’s literally running the house and she does what she wants, no one should have to deal with this while pregnant
Because legally it would also impact if they get to keep their baby. It makes them look like bad guardians and it makes it so the state can step in and take their baby as well.
I really don’t think that’s true
Doesn't work that way.
I gave up my bad ass daughter to the state and still had custody of my other children. Took her to the office dropped her off to them and left. Screw that.
Tell that to OP
OPs father is the worst kind of human being. I had a stepfather like that.
My bio dad was like that, instead of like the op's sister being raised to be like op it was more like to replace me as I'm a girl and he wanted a boy so later when my mom divorced him when I was 11, he got a son with his ap a 6yr old son at that time...
Story 1, that's not BPD, that's sociopathy.
THANK YOU. I have BPD with bipolar comorbid.
there are four types one can be manipulative and attention seeking, but the other three types are basically self destructive, impulsive and petty shit. don't get me wrong BPD can have sociopathic behavior patterns but most of us are not.
education is so important as BPD is literally more stigmatized than antisocial personality disorder (sociopathy) and narcissistic who often go out of their way to wreck others lives and feel zero empathy. BPD feels a lot. we overfeel. our cope is self destruct.
If she is 15, she can be diagnosed. That's what's weird about this story.
@PandoraBear357 which is the weird irony of this. I was told the same thing. "oh we don't want to label you"
you mean get me a proper diagnosis so we can manage treatment properly and so I don't suffer for the next ten years of my life before getting to proper care with therapy and meds?
oh yes, they absolutely will do this. it's fuckin WILD how garbage some doctors are. I have medical ptsd across the board from shit like not addressing mental illness to not wanting to remove my tonsils though it was clear it needed to happen (and the ENT wrote on my chart I was a chronic factitious even after he removed them and admitted in front of my family that they were in fact bad, badly infected tonsils). they also did an MRI of my spine to figure out my chronic pain (but skipped the dye for the nerves, which, guess what, it was squished nerves and nerve damage). I went somewhere else did a second MRI guess what they found immediately because they actually used the dye?
If you guessed nerve damage from my c2 down to my c7 then here's a candy and 800 jeopardy points
OP's a kind person, and it says a lot she feels bad for wanting the sister gone. But alas, that girl needs to go. You can't keep trying to fix someone who doesn't want to be fixed.
It’s so sad that OP does want to legitimately help her sister, but I think in my opinion, the parents either didn’t care or they just did the bare minimum to the point where they just clothed her and fed her, but didn’t bother about showing her to wash or take care of herself I think they just said here’s a sandwich bye and that’s it.
That kid is literally the antichrist and there's no convincing me otherwise, the dad was fucked in raising her and now she's an absolute monster, if OP should be mad at anyone, it's the dad
OP’s sister is a sociopath. Also, I don’t know how OP did not give up her to the state. After all of the Hell she put them through. The sister has not suffered ANY consequences for any of the lies, stealing, lack of hygiene, and animal abuse.
Part of it is the fact that since this is written after it all, the sister was manipulating them to the point that the insanity of it became a “normal”
I came here to say this same thing. The way that the half sister consistently ignores animals to the point of health hazards, and then asks if she forgot they existed is not absent-mindedness, it's malicious negligence. And that's not even taking into account how this kid does not seem to derive enjoyment out of anything aside from lying.
Why not just put her up for adoption
@@sliqyplayz8072 The older you are, the less likely you are to be adopted. Nobody wants a problematic 16-year-old.
It could be cuz her sister’s therapist was an idiot at noticing the signs of BPD and actually praised her instead of providing solid evidence that she is a sociopath. Also OP and her husband are both idiots for never recording how she kept her room and lied about them to her therapist. All OP had to do is keep catching or recording her sister, lying all the time. So that OP can provide the evidence to the state or mental asylum to get the sister out of her house🤷♀️
Surely the girl qualifies as needing to be committed, right? It can't be any more expensive than paying for all that therapy, dental work, and exterminators (and whatever a hazmat cleaning service goes for). Tell the therapist that she's a danger to herself and others, and that you can't adequately care for her with her current mental state, and GET HER OUT OF YOUR HOUSE.
Ah op made a big mistake, if op kicking girl out after she is 18, then don’t get a new house before op do that. So even she tried to retaliate and come back, she can’t find op. Now stuck with new house with potential jeopardize with retaliation and ruining the house.
Why would you decide to have a kid with this little gremlin skittering around the house 💀
I asked that same question
YOU WANT TO HAVE HER AROUND YOUR BABY?!! A BABY THAT CAN'T DEFEND ITSELF?!! TAKE HER TO A POLICE STATION WITH THE PAPERWORK, MAYBE IN ANOTHER STATE. You'll have to sleep DONT keep her in your house when the baby arrives. She will see the baby as a problem that she needs to get rid of.
1st Story She seems like she has anti-social personality traits. She lies easily, never takes responsibility for her actions, selfish, narcissistic, cruel to animals. This child is dangerous I would sleep with my bedroom door locked.
That's not anti-social. Anti-social traits would be like never leaving the house, never wanting to meet new ppl, being ok with never talking to ppl etc. I've been suspected to have schizoid or anti-social and it's not like op's sister. The therapists are right that its probably borderline and/or sociopathy.
@@She_Sordid You have no idea what you are talking about. Anti personality disorder refers to symptoms that pertain to sociopathy, and psychopathy.
@@medic13601 Considering what my phycologists themselves have told me, I do. Anti-social refers to it's name, not being social.
@@She_Sordid You need to find a new psychologist then. What you are describing is called being asocial, anti-social disorders are a completely different thing and so is antisocial behavior (which is an entirely different but related third thing).
@@2XocraM Me: Says something my psychologist told me without quoting word for word and said it to the best of my ability without being a psychologist
You: Get a new one
If all you have to do is tell the doctor you're being coorced to donate an organ will make you illegible to donate. No way would kidnapping to force a surgocy be legal.
Okay, I can't finish this. OP is just pissing me off.
Yeah this seems so ridiculously over the top. I know people like this exist but how much of a doormat can you be
I like how she said "my husband is deathly allergic, I'm terrified of them and it broke our lease" in one sentence and somehow she still thought it was ok 😂😂
@@OnePunchKirby That was quite the statement. I don't know about you,but there's no way an animal/bug is coming into my house that I am scared of or just don't like.
Never let somebody live in your house, especially if they have made it clear that they have it out for you. Traumatic upbringing or not, the half-sister is a manipulative, destructive thief. The more comfortable she gets with sabotaging OP's life, it will only be a matter of time before she does something that completely crosses the line, especially for somebody who obviously has no sense of boundaries.
You shouldn't feel obligated to house an A-hole parents' affair child. Especially if that child has expressed animosity towards you. This girl should have been in therapy long ago but it's far late for that. The longer she stays the more grief she'll cause towards op and ops loved ones.
Your husband, your baby, your pets aren’t safe with her there. This is so scary because she is capable of harming anyone at this point. Stop worrying about looking like a “bad” person and worry about the safety of your family and the damage to your new home.
Can't find the 1st story anywhere so I'm guessing it turned out to be fake
28:29 sadly it sounds like, OP half sister was extremely mentaly and emotionaly abused, and needs to be place in a mental hospial
OP: "clearly, I am incredibly naive and easy to fool", "I'm an idiot"
Damn, bruh, you have no idea 🗿
Why's that demon still not in the foster system yet? Does OP not value her child's life? 👀 We already see that her and her husband's lives mean nothing to OP
OP's like "OMG, I dragged a monster from hell and couldn't make a sweet kitty out of it 😫, I'm so guilty I failed her". This pisses me off like SO MUCH
An old guy ik used to say that you are the creator of your own downfall and it couldn't be any further from OP's situation. My opinion would've been to not take her in in the first place. I feel sorry for the husband not OP. Literally man deserves a better partner.
I know you said that social services won’t help you but call CPS state what she’s doing and tell them how she’s going to create a bad environment for your three month old child. Tell them that she’s not mentally stable because clearly somethings wrong with her.
Eventually you stop feeling bad for OP because she allows it to keep happening. At this point her best option is to give up custody or put her in an institution now because otherwise she will lose her husband and her new baby because the sister cannot be around them and they cannot wait 2 more years.
There seem to be no consequences for the sister and she is allowed to do whatever she wants.
Also the fact that they refuse to properly diagnose/treat her because "she's too young" is ridiculous at this point imo. She's 16, not 6, and clearly needs help.
As a former foster parent I can say that OP is enabling so much of this girl’s behavior to the point that she’s allowing her to wreck her life with very little consequences. She’s too old for her to put up with any of this regardless of her past. She needs very real life consequences for her actions *every*single*time that she pulls something. And why she isn’t on meds just because she’s a teenager is beyond comprehension. She needs to be medicated properly if she’s bipolar/borderline because her brain literally can’t function properly without medication. I had a friend diagnosed with this as well as a mother that I could bet the bank also has it. Her behavior is “very” much like my diagnosed friend’s behavior. Like spot on. Life will NEVER get any easier until she’s got a decent doctor working to level out the brain chemicals that are out of balance in that girl. My friend, off her bipolar meds, was like a whole different nonfunctional person. Wildly unstable and quite able to do real damage to people. On it? So so SO much better on her meds. Normal. So yeah this girl would be put on proper meds and on extremely limited privileges until she complied without fail just like they do in residential treatment homes for kids who can’t live in normal homes/families. You have to earn every right that you want without fail in those places. Want a privilege? You go take that shower or “no deal”. You don’t get a THING (other than basic necessities/food) without earning that right. Only good compliant behavior gets you anything extra. Structure and routine is so important to people like this until they learn how to function in normal society. They need rules and boundaries at every turn in order to turn their lives around and lead a better existence.
Take everything out of her room, bed on floor clear totes for her things.
Cameras everywhere in the house to prove what is going on.
Take pictures of her room also
I’ve heard of adoptive parents giving up their child after they adopted said child. I don’t understand why OP in the first story can’t do the same.
Why would she do that?
The second story: why does she need to flee her own house? Just don’t open the door when those crazy witches show up. Doormats annoy me.
Well, think about the way the texts sounded: “You will stay with us, so that we Know where you are.” “You Will do this.”
CS is not taking “NO” for an answer. Especially not after being told no by their other sisters. (Not to mention she got her, her other sister’s and OP’s MOM side with her on this!)
They sound like a crazy person ready to take someone against their will by any means necessary. (Kidnapping) And who knows what lengths a person like that might go to accomplish their goal? Those lengths might endanger not only OP, but her fiancé and children as well.
Also, there are people who are emotionally fragile, so OP might’ve thought she was in danger in this situation. (Which I could see that being a possibility for this.)
In the choice of “Fight or Flight”, OP chose Flight thinking about protecting her family from something that could’ve escalated quickly. (They could’ve called the police if CS or their mom showed up, but then again like I said before, things could’ve gotten bad before the police got there.)
OP was dumb throughout the whole story and even though she had good intentions, she deserve everything she gets for being naive.
orphanage
this “sister” is older than me and is acting half as mature
this “sister” is very narcissistic
this “sister” is a NASTY AHH BOP
I can see why her parents ran as fast and as far as they Could.
that is way more akin to antisocial personality disorder than BPD. there are four types, and while one can be manipulative, the other three are petty, self destructive, and impulsice behavior that generally does more harm to ourselves than others (and everyone understandably gets sick of being along for the ride).
there are tools to help manage symptoms. DBT, CBT, and a good psychiatrist for medications have helped me so much as a BPD bipolar.
the only good thing of second story is the fact there’s a healthy coparenting relationship with her ex. i wish more kiss got to experience it
I just love making it in time to see and hear the countdown.
Yes.😂
Jesus christ that title
Can someone give me a summary please? I don't really like listening to reddit stories that involves pets being involved with animal cruelty 😅
OP’s dad cheated on her mom and had OP’s half sister with another woman. But the dad tried to make the half sister just like OP which caused her to hate Op. Years later OP had to take in her sister because both of the parents abandoned her, but her sister is a demon around her and OP’s husband. She never cleaned her room,(She put pads and trash in her drawers) never washed herself, doesn’t take care of the pets (bought a bunny even though OP’s husband is allergic to it), and is overall a terrible person, but no one believes OP about her sister because everyone thinks she’s nice. 2 years later OP can’t get rid of her because she took her in too quickly and OP just had a baby and she’s worried for him.
Jesus I can't blame the sister's mother for having a breakdown and leaving that kid
I remember my aunt (shes an former addict but has similar behaviors) had a hygiene issue like this girl and my cousin who has the same family nickname as her made her sit in the tub fully clothed then sprayed her with dishsoap and a hose and scrubbed at her with a body brush then washed her mouth with a bar of soap. I don't approve of that method, but It worked and there were no more issues after that.
Don't keep her in your home. You don't have to live like this
Person with BPD here. That is not BPD, i'd get a second opinion.
OP is důmb for allowing her, in her home.
First story if I was op's husband I would leave her and take the kid not the sister.
Just a small note, rabbits are NOT rodents, they are lagomorphs. Interestingly, if people have an allergic reaction to rabbits, it’s usually due to a protein in their saliva.
When a child is cruel to animals, it’s a major warning sign that should never be ignored. I can’t believe they ever left any pets in her care after how she treated her rabbit. There is no way in hell I would have her living in my home with any other children, especially children too young to verbalize anything she might do to them.
That baby is going to be abused in some way, possibly even killed if they allow her to stay in their home.
Bruh, the husband should divorce and seek full custody of the baby with no visitation rights.
But then again, he's probably the same idiot as the op, otherwise he would have already put his foot down.
That sounds like narcissistic behavior, if I was you pit cameras all around the house inside and out without her knowing make sure they are small and unnoticeable get evidence then take it to the therapist and have her committed period.
So ops sister saw how shes living and rhought i want to live like this and lied about her abuses and shit from her parents her parents gave her to op without hesitation because theyve been dealing with ops sis and dont wanna anymore. She was abandoned on op because of ops sis bpd
She is a danger to herself and others. Institutionalization her now.
3 guesses as to just why the mom up and left without telling anyone.
Some kids are a lost cause because it is not bad to say, it is just facts. If you arent able to come to terms with this then you will allow that lost cause to ruin your life.
Sister is a psychopath.
Go to a foreign country that doesn’t speak English take her passport in the middle of the night and fly home change your phone number and move to a different state then change your last names or send her to a trouble teen camp and refuse to take her back
It’s not abandonment it’s escaping a monster
This story repeats itself too much
I'm up to the cat chapter part of the story 😮.
Thank you for sharing your story. It sounds incredibly challenging, and I admire your strength and patience. Have you considered involving a professional mediator to help navigate these complex family dynamics? What do you think could be improved in handling such situations?
Second Story; NOT the Ah!
Tell your Sister that if Your Eggs are 'Her DNA Anyways' than WHY CANT YALLS MOTHER EGGS DO?! oh Bc is that JUST LIKE raising a SIBLING and NOT a Paternal Child?! Is THAT why? ORR is it 'just gross, eww no why would I use Mums Eggs instead, That's NOT the Same" BULLSH.
Bc for REAL, if it's 'Just Eggs and Similar Enough Dna' that the Sister wants in order for a Biological related Child, than ASK and GET IT FROM THE MAMA, NOT your Own Sister! Problem Solved.
Whooo! 🎯🔥💯
Tom! It's FIRE! I'm so impressed with the how HARD this hits and how quickly you brought this out.
Says everything. 👌
Idk I've always believed that you should be able to relinquish ANY child to the state without consequences because what's the alternative? That the kid stays in a home with parent(s) who hate them? Yea I'm sure that'll be great & no issues will arise from that whatsoever.
Some people don't realize until the kid is born that they hate kids. Some people have a severe decline in circumstances, whether it be mental or financial. If someone is overwhelmed & knows they are incapable of parenting a child, we should want there to be options for them to take & that they will take because it won't ruin their entire life to use that option so the child isn't harmed by that parent. This should be common sense but unfortunately the US isn't great at using any common sense whatsoever. We do things based on punishment & feelings. It sure is going awesome so far lol.
Our family has been taking in kids from fostercare for decades and OPs kid does sound exactly like some of the kids we had here. Three of them were exactly like that, to the extreme with the lying and manipulating, even to the point where it became dangerous. These kids should have never been placed in foster homes, but it's very hard to figure that out beforhand if parents are either not aware of their kid being like that (one of them was smart enough to make it look like their brother was the unhinged one) or if they come from an abusive home and have been taken out by cps and still have to be evaluated, but usually they need an emergency place to stay immediately, which will often be with a foster family. We would have both long-term placings as well as emergency placings in which they will stay a maximum of 3 months (all of this is in the Netherlands btw)
Anyway, those three kids shouldn't have been placed with a family and afterwards all three were eventually placed in a 24/7 surveillance facility. One of them didn't go there immediately, but was placed in another facility, also with a high alert level of care, but not as strict and structured as a 24/7 surveillance one. She tried to burn that place down. (One of the reasons they shouldn't have been in foster families, this is something healthcare professionals should be handling) After that she was obviously moved immediately.
From what OP is telling us, I'm certain the kid belongs in a 24/7 facility, especially because of the lying, as healthcare workers can be bamboozled quite easily when those kids aren't under camera observation, as they work in shifts and manipulative kids like that will exploit the gaps within the transitions between shifts and they will know exactly were the gaps are when it comes to the workers sharing information. We've seen one such place which wasnt a very strict place, basically just for kids that were transitioning to adulthood and going to a group home afterwards as they were mentally impaired and therefor not able to be living alone. Anyway, this kid had just lost her dad and her manipulative mom saw a gap to come waltzing back into the girls life and basically destroy it, by feeding her lies. She wanted to get her out of the group home, but didn't have authority to do so. So she had the kid come up with lies of being abused by her former foster family, the kid starts telling these lies to the healthcare workers at her grouphome, whom blindly believe her and never even tried to go into a deeper conversation to figure out whether she was telling the truth or not. Which would have been ridiculously easy as this girl was mentally impaired and could've never kept her story straight for too long as it was lies fed to her by her mother. As they believed her the case was escalated to the police and foster organizations. The former foster parents were kept in the dark and the foster organizations they worked with instantly dropped their support, even though this family had been fostering for over 20 years I believe at that point and had always had perfect remarks and evaluations by all organizations and other professionals involved. But no one even bothered to look a little further into the stories before duping those foster parents like that. Absolutely abhorrent. And these are the dangers they won't warn you about when training to become a foster parent. (You need to do a 2 year course to get licensed to be a foster parent) Which to me is bonkers, as it is a very real danger, since there will always be parents angry about their kids being taken from them and they will be looking for someone to blame and take revenge on. They can't really do that to the governments foster organization, so they will come for the foster parents.
So when it comes to being a foster parent, better have your ducks in a row and always be able to proove you were never alone or inappropriate with a kid of the opposite sex. Luckily those foster parents were able to proove that and with only a few questions the police had already determined the kid was a liar. However the mother took it a step further by telling some friends or acquaintances and this led to that poor foster family being harrassed publicly on Facebook. And you know how these things go, people will have an opinion instantly. One of these friends was even messaging the son in law to keep his kids from their grandparents. 😮 luckily he knew about the ordeal and blocked this woman, but jot before telling her to better check who's lies she's believing and putting herself on the line for.. allthough there isnt really a way to get through to people like that.
Luckily the family didn't have Facebook accounts themselves, the harassing happened on their kids pages and they had to promptly delete all family pictures or put them to private, as that was what these people were commenting under.
OP is only in her early 20s, and was clearly bamboozled into adopting this kid, but there must be a way to undo this. Do it quickly and have the kid sent to one of these observation facilities, they might be able to help and also keep her off the streets once she turns 18 and keep her under observation as she's not capable of doing normal human things at the moment. This is a problem for the experienced professionals.
The sister in the first story is absolutely terrible, she's undeniably conniving and evil, seriously she makes Eric Cartman from South Park look like an angel in comparison
Story 1: OP'S father is a piece of shit, the reason his daughter is like that is because of him and when he should've stepped up he ran away. It's a shame OP had to step up for her father, especially since she probably did so out of guilt😔
Story 2: Just Say NO. MAKE IT CLEAR. end of story.
Question? You stated you had her for the pass 2 years from the time she was 16?do you live in the states bc if you do... We now know she's playing head games. She is now 18 which for us is considered an adult. Give her 30day notice to find somewhere else to live. Then change your locks
she smells SO BAD but everyone outside the home loves her---yeah right if she smelled that bad NO one would go near her
I can’t believe OP put her husband through this nightmare
Ops sis clearly knows what shes doing to op her husband and her house. Op sis is mental and needs to be put into care uf shes going to act like that.
The fact op could have given up her rights from the start but didn’t is stupid
Story 1 OP is infuriatingly stupid.
That's not BPD. Also, she's old enough to be diagnosed.
Ummmmmm you need to get her OUT of your house!! Yesterday!!!!
imagine she thought it was soap and did a backflip
take ur sister to another country for a vacation and leave her there too much mess
That clip would have gone to boot camp
Womb Raiders
First story: I'm in the process of adopting a kid from foster care. You always hear awful stories about foster families, but my son was in close to a dozen and only has one horror story. (transphobic little old lady that insisted on treating him like a girl, it sucked but wasn't SA, physical abuse or murder) CPS and foster families are, on balance, heroes. They are way better equipped to deal with OP's sister. If OP hasn't already kicked her sister out, she needs to call CPS and terminate her custody. Sister's behavior is unfair to OP and her family, and OP's inability to give sister whatever it is she needs isn't fair to her either. I can't guarantee that "the system" will be able to help sister, but it stands a better chance, and won't destroy OP's life as well.
i don’t think i’ve heard a single story of surrogacy between family ending well
The sister sounds like my dad. He did the exact same things in order to keep my mom, younger brother, and myself under control.
Thisbis a shit story relly just repeats excessively