It Gets Better BYU - John Patrick
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 4 เม.ย. 2012
- Students from Brigham Young University share a personal message for the It Gets Better Project.
USGA (Understanding Same-Gender Attraction) is an unofficial group of Brigham Young University students, faculty, and friends who wish to strengthen families and the BYU community by providing a place for open, respectful discussions on the topic of same-gender attraction. USGA is not an appropriate forum for angry, vulgar, or profane remarks of any kind, nor for expressions of antagonism against any person or organization. In order to foster an environment of respect and understanding, we ask all participants to be respectful of BYU, the Church, and the beliefs and experiences of others.
Find USGA on Facebook at: groups/byuusga
The It Gets Better Project was created to show young LGBT people the levels of happiness, potential, and positivity their lives will reach -- if they can just get through their teen years. The It Gets Better Project wants to remind teenagers in the LGBT community that they are not alone - and it WILL get better.
The website www.itgetsbetter.org is a place where young people who are lesbian, gay, bi, or trans can see how love and happiness can be a reality in their future. It's a place where straight allies can visit and support their friends and family members. It's a place where people can share their stories, take the It Gets Better Project pledge, watch videos of love and support, and seek help.
If you are considering suicide or need help, call the Trevor Project now: 866-4-U-TREVOR (866-488-7386).
Take the pledge: www.itgetsbetter.org/pledge
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John Patrick, thank you so much for your testimony. Your example is being watched and appreciated by those of us that needed to hear this, including myself. I am a former southern baptist and to this day my old christian friends from church will not accept me. All I can do is pray for them and keep keeping on. I pray that you stay strong in your faith and keep sharing your testimony as it is so powerful. God is calling you to reach out to gays/lesbians especially those that are hurt. Blessings.
Hey John, I'm in concert choir with you too. Thank you for being courageous and sharing your story with us; you are doing a lot of good for a lot of people. I wish you the best in your journey.
Well said, John - hugs and blessings
".. the most important thing that I could ever learn to do is to love myself." I spent eight years hating myself, thinking I was somehow broken and needed to be fixed, because the church told me I was wrong. Finally, I realized, if that's what the love of the church is, I don't want it. Maybe it was the cowardly way out, but I've never been happier, happier ever than I was hoping that somehow I could become 'normal' one day. If God or the church says I'm wrong, so be it, but I am happy now.
John I totally sympathise with you. I know what it is like to be persecuted, hated and picked out by members of this church for being who I am. I have always been considered a "nerd", and unfortunately I can dress differentely, act differently, or distract myself, I can adapt... you cannot change your feelings. Guys like you need to keep coming forward. If we are the true church of God then we need to remember that we all need to be Christ Like.
Awesome guy! Thanks for your story.
thanks for sharing, I'm 48 years old now but still living the life you were in high school, you are so brave, I'm happy for you
John, I'm in concert choir with you...thanks for what you said. It's inspiring and I'm glad to understand more about you and others like you. I respect you for who you are.
In spite of my previous comment, I must say that the message here is beautiful. Thank you for that, and for your courage. Indeed, there will always be a place in this world for everyone.
Thank you, 52 from TX.
I have been struggling with my religion and my sexuality for years. I want to be true to my faith and be true to myself. Through prayer and meditation I have found myself. I know that I can walk a straight and narrow path that the Lord has set for me, and be true to myself, as being gay. This video has helped me be more stronger. I am in a firm believer that time is the biggest obstacle. Thank you very much for this video.
"you dont give a crap anymore what people think!! and you do what you like to do whether you have support or not!!"
Thank you.
Thank you for clarifying this, JohnPatrick. A subject in another video also let me know this at about the same time you did. I have made my contribution to the "farbetween" project.
Thank you for your efforts.
i love this video ! and i love him too . if you were there i would love you with all my heart
08:09 ABSOLUTELY TRUE!!!
Thank you for sharing this. Young people need to see these types of videos, it helps them a lot during the struggles they go through growing up and finding out who they are. I recently interviewed some GLBT high school kids (see my channel for video) who are lucky to be in a very supporting environment. Hopefully more schools will take a proactive stance against GLBT discrimination.
One of my best friends grew up gay and Mormon. He came out and he was welcomed by his congregation and everyone around him... as long as he remained celibate. When he met a man who went on to become his life parter, he was essentially "uninvited" from church because of his relationship. When he was forced to choose between the man he loved and denying that love, he left the church and never looked back. How sad that it was okay to be gay as long as he never had a boyfriend or partner.
The thing that will help the Church will be on many different fronts: 1) Marriage Equality legalized across the U.S. espec. supported by the SCOTUS. 2) the personal lives and examples of strong LGBT families who show forth the fruits of love, spirituality and commitment over years. 3) Exposing bigotry and hate especially when it is subliminal. 4) The establishment & enforcement of LGBT anti-discrimination laws. 5) Zero tolerance for homophobia among Church members.
This video is just super cool! He is very honest and I like it very much. Also, feeling almost the same as he did in school, I did. I understand how difficult it can be and I really do hope it gets better!!! Thanks for what you do, I support you and this work as a gay mormon for 100%. LOVE you guys. Be happy!
Thank you! I am mormon... and straight. I fully endorse this message and pray for all LGBT who feel rejected and alone.
I hope that all of you at USGA will continue to spread your message and let people, both within and without the LDS church, know that there are indeed gay Mormons and that they, too, are part of the community. Furthermore, I hope that you will take some of your energy and love of life to work to advance the cause of gay rights, be it within the church, within the state of Utah, or throughout all of America. What all of you have done here is a very good start.
John, you are a brave man. Your sexuality is a gift and through it's lens you will become a man of measure, a person through whom others will learn to judge their own authenticity and integrity. Believe it!
This is a brave and honest video, and you should realize how much your making it is appreciated. You have helped people see a side of Brigham Young University that they may never have seen before or even thought about. You have done a very good job here.
behavior is different from desires, and frowning on the behavior is different than hating those who practice it.
John and the other guys on "It Gets Better BYU" are so kind. Thank you for sharing your stories.
You guys at USGA are doing a great job!
God loves you no matter what, so keep going!
The Church teaches love and compassion even to those with whom we disagree. Growing up in Utah as a Mormon, and still actively so, I truly believe in the church and it's message of unconditional love. Do all members live that way? Of course not. We could all do better, but the image of a church that teaches hate is not at all what I've experienced. I, like John, grew up not caring the least about sports, and was teased over and over because of it. I'm not gay, but I can empathize with that part!
I also grew up in an LDS community. I understand that there is a fear of backlash or discrimination that can come from it, but understand that there are people that understand and will support you. Your sexuality is a part of you but does not define you. Our Heavenly Father will love you no matter what and that is all that matters.
You are right! High school in general is hard!! But what makes it more hard is when you are stereo typed into a certain group because of the things you like and it isnt right! Thats one of the reasons why they have or will take music out of schools!!
This video is so inspirational. God Bless You! I pray more people, gay and straight, will realize the truth held in this video. Thank you, gay/straight ally students of BYU, for being so brave in making these videos.
YESHUA always taught to sin no more
we may sin unintentionally but we have no licence to sin and must resist
we must stay focused on GOD and put our bodies in subjection to HIM for they are NOT our own if we have surrendered to HIM
You are so handsome!!!!!!
I don't have a girl friend. I still don't... even at BYU I didn't date. Some chic actually had the nerves to confront me one night and in all seriousness ask me if I was gay.... So I was stuck... I could not lie, but the pressure was too intense... So I found the courage to tell her that I was and always have been a Raging Lesbian trapped in a man's body. She blinked... and I pretended to come on to her for a week. Haters gonna hate so if they do... mess with their heads.....
John thank you for share your story, it's really help me to USGA,
I love that! "I don't have to be anything I don't want to be" thank you for the video.
This is hands down my favorite "It Gets Better" of them all.
You're right! sometimes i think they use that as an excuse not to spend money! Getting stereotyped? You do get used to it! actually when you reach a certain age, like 41 like i am, you dont give a crap anymore what people think!! and you do what you like to do whether you have support or not!! :)
...by what the American Psychological Association and others believed at that time coupled with their own views and traditional scriptural interpretation on the subject. Even after the APA dropped homosexuality from the list of psychological disorders in 1973 it took the Church many more years to change its views to where it is now. With groups like NARTH, Evergreen, North Star and others that is slowing the process even more as LGBT LDS must weave through the labyrinth toward self-acceptance.
the most in the intire world, in my oppinion.
it's the people who run the church. they don't need to abandon their mormon beliefs, they just need to not listen to people's ignorance. i grew up in a public school system and had a very similar experience as john. people would call me gay as an insult, like it was something that was morally apprehensible to be, and they did this before i even knew what it meant to be gay. so it's not the church, it's the people. and now byu has a GSA, because of the bravery of these students..
John Patrick, I am gay and went to BYU. Know that there are lots of choices. You can do something about your attractions. Once I met people who successfully resolved many of the reasons for their same-sex attractions, and once I read books like Resolving Homosexual Problems: A Guide for LDS Men, I realized that I had a lot of choices and could keep God's commandments.
Hola!, donde podría encontrar la traducción al castellano de todas estas experiencias. Hay gente homosexual SUD que no entiende el ingles y necesita también ayuda de ese tipo. Muchas gracias.
I enjoyed your video. You are honest and genuine. I wish you great success.
Peace and love
-James
I have walked on the path your on.....and the biggest lesson I've learned is to believe you aren't flawed infact your a talented and kind guy who simply shouldered abuse every day . Don't stress about fools who think there so much better than you ? Life can be amazing if you leave the hateful fools to there own pitiful small lives. Don't look back:)
Is there any found evidence of this? That the church stood to lose their tax-exempt status? Not doubting you, just would love to have that information. thanks.
The issue with most people is they give a flip what anyone else thinks. Who cares what you think about me...unless you are my employer...your opinion or thoughts does not count toward me. Why do we put so much weight on what anyone else thinks?
Be kind, polite and tactful.
I went through everything down to the t, that John Patrick did and Im a bit older and grew up on the other side of the country. When I was growing up you didnt have anyone to look up to back in the late 1970's and 1980's. People back in the 60's and 70's still considered it a mental illness! And it is a lot harder for guys to be gay then it is for girl. Im 41, and when i was a boy and u didnt like sports or working on a car?? but if ur a girl and u like sports & cars then shes a tomboy its hard
@1trentongregory-- thank you for saying everything you have said. The sad truth about being a gay Mormon is that it usually does NOT get better. The church just makes being gay even harder than it already is.
That is really cruel! I think that is torture of someone's mental health.. Using between everything they know, their values, their believes on one side and on the other side the love of their live, their believe (that's not changing) and an unknown future.
If your family can't really accept who you are, what you want, how can you been sure that strangers can..
I hope IT GETS BETTER in the USA and everywhere else where the community ask to make an impossible choice, because both will hurt!
lol I knew someone would make a comment about how hot this lad is. Thanks for making me laugh today. I agree BTW!!
Remember when the Church looked upon blacks differently than they do today? And then the prophet had a revelation that changed the standing of blacks within the Church? Did God change His mind about blacks? No. There was a revelation. Same as polygamy... there was a revelation. I have faith that the LDS Church will have a revelation through the prophet regarding homosexuality. God doesn't deny love to anyone. God IS love. Love is love. It knows no gender.
"The most important thing that I could ever do ~ is to learn to love myself"
"If you love yourself you will always be loved"
"You don't Have to be anything that I don't want to be"
"There is NO reason why you shouldn't love yourself with all of your energy"
"There is nobody else that can be you as well as you can"
"There will always be a place for you in this world"
I love him so much.
~*Lets be friends*~
Good job, man. You really get Christianity. Way to strengthen your fellow men.
How do you deal with needing to have a heterosexual temple wedding to attain the third level of the Celestial kingdom of heaven in Mormonism?
There is a promise that when Christ returns for the second coming that during his millennial reign that anyone who does everything they are capable of doing will have the opportunity to do everything that is required for salvation.
Never mind. I realized last year that arguing with ignorant people don't ever change their mind. They don't want to know the truth, or even to feel it! They just want to find erros, mistakes and so forth on us. Jesus himself said "Why do you try to find errors in others when actually there's a BIG trouble with you? Instead of that, help your brother with his trouble, and then take away that big error from yourself"- I don't remember exactly the words, but the teaching is something like that..
I could never imagine anyone downvoting this. Stay strong, John. Miss you.
He is REALLY cute.
This is so great John! I'm so proud of you for being a part of this project.
The Bible is parable & allegory. To understand it one must understand the symbols used in the parables. For example, when it says wife must submit to husband it means emotions(wife,fem) must submit to mind(husband,masc) "Shoot the bull" does not mean kill an animal, it means have a conversation. The Bible is like that. Paul said be not a minister of the letter for the letter kills, meaning don't take this literally otherwise you will not get it. In the world, we fight over this...we missed it.
I'm so used to rude and thoughtless TH-cam comments that I was very surprised by your kind reply. Thanks! I will absolutely agree to disagree. For my part, I believe the Lord (not man) has set the standards regarding the Celestial Kingdom and will help ANY person who desires to make it. I'm currently reading "Voice(s) of Hope" by Ty Mansfield about church members who, like himself, experience(d) same-sex attraction but successfully and happily live by the church's teachings re: homosexuality.
Nice cop out.
Your video is so inspiring to me, I can relate so much to your story. I am actually a 25 year old male who is struggling with accepting my sexuality. I would love to message you, John Patrick for some advice, feel free to sending me a message. Thanks
thats what happen to you if you try to hide yourself, accept who you are and love yourself would freed you from the bad thing that you have thinking
Life is more like a river than a statue
Shortly after this film was published, John was dismissed from BYU for violating the school's "don't talk about it and maybe it'll go away" policy. :-)
This never happened, but ok 🧐
Good job. Kepp holding to the rod, but try not to stroke it.
Also, rumor has it BYU is going to crack down on gay and lesbian students to uphold the school standards and human standards they feel are slipping. Roberts and Cox are gonna start checking with people before they are accepted at the school now. Cool
Yet, the LDS church has said: "Homosexual behavior is contrary to that purpose and violates God’s commandments." How does that work? Does the church go against Jesus's teachings?
Regardless of whether anyone watching this agrees with the message, as a child of God, ask yourself, "What would Jesus do?". Based on who he hung out with in the Bible, what he had to say about gays (nothing) and pretty much every other topic of sin (next to nothing), what would he do here? He would love. Period. He didn't condemn anyone. He didn't take the seat of judge, what makes any of us think we can??? Jesus showed us how to act with compassion, our job is to do it.
That's too bad. Most people are bullied in High School.
Ask Kate Kelly: If you're a woman, you will never have the priesthood. And if you are gay and do not marry a woman, how can you fit in to the teachings of the Church (think 'Lorenzo Snow's couplet')?
This is not about support and you know it. This isn't even about the whole gay straight thing. This is about the rules , and the attempt to soften or dilute them under the guise of "Being supportive", or whatever warm fuzzy thing we can come up with. Rules are rules and they have to be enforced.
I hope one day the people close to you can be understanding of your sexuality, but how can they be when you don't accept yourself? Is ok to be gay, you should never be ashame of being who you are this wasn't a decision that you made, you where born this way. I'm a straight LDS but my mind has never wrap aroud the idea of being gay is wrong or a sin, or the " you can be gay but don't act up on it" I'd rather leave the church and be happy knowing that God knows me and can look into my heart.
way to help encourage tolerance with your own blatant intolerance. in case your forgot religious persecution is a form of bigotry as well. and sewing hatred will only reep hatred.
He also said not to judge. Struggling with same-sex attraction is not working iniquity. Have you actually heard anything this guy said?
"High school was hard.....I liked music, I liked theater, I liked art..." Saying that only gay people like music theater and art is incredibly sexist and discriminatory.
I don't think you understood what I wrote. I did not say the scriptures said anything. I said it is the "interpretation" of it that is the error. When you say I "twist scripture" you mean "twist your interpretation of it." When you say "...will never change the truth" you mean you will never change your "interpretation" of what you believe is truth. When you say God's stance will never change, you mean you will never change. The "liar" is in he who interpretes it, not it of itself.
Dang. He is cute. O_p
I think breaking gender norms evokes more hate than being gay. On the other hand, I think if you don't do typical male things, you are forced to deal with being gay earlier (and get it over with). There are lots of gay men who are masculine...but in hiding (successfully). But it sucks.
i suggest you peek into HIS word and SEE what JESUS said
HE warned about HELL
HE said that few would find the way [ HIM ]
plus HE warned that not all calling LORD LORD would be allowed into the kingdom
in fact HE said HE would say '' get away from ME workers of iniquity I never knew you ''
No, I think you're good to stand up for what you believe in. I also think it's sad you feel superior to and justified in judging people who struggle with something you don't (and don't understand.) If these videos save even one suicidal kid from taking his/her own life, they've done their job beyond measure. And if they encourage and remind even a handful of people that they're loved, despite the inimical attitudes of others, then they are right in line with what Christ would probably do.
They take music out of schools because music programs are more expensive. Everyone gets stereotyped in High School, and even after, better get used to it.
This video gives me the creeps. I feel like he was speaking right at me because we have similar struggles....and if he reads this I hope he clicks on my page and watches my video that I just uploaded.....anyway...great video bud
If he thought it was okay, why the hell would he have made ADAM and EVE a man and a woman???
By the way what is very sad is the fact that this dearth of revelation for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints regarding gay and lesbian members has allowed for the waves of anti-gay sentiment to be embraced at worst and tolerated at best. The first wave came during the McCarthy era which highly influenced the institutional Church sending Mark E. Peterson and Spencer W. Kimball to research and learn about the "problem of homosexuality in the Church." They were highly influenced...
Cant be that easy, specially if your entire family is mormon, so they want you to go to BYU
Compassion? What about respect for the rules laws and regulations. At what point do we disregard the rules for compassion? I am pretty sure they did not teach that to you at BYU.
Don't waste your time with those people. They're not worth of it.
Steve, is it? This is just my interpretation…Isaiah 45:7 "I form the light, & create darkness: I make peace, & create evil: I the LORD do all these things." If homosexuality is evil, then the LORD created it. To clarity further: to say a thing is evil is an interpretation. Homosexuality is homosexuality. A knife is a knife, i.e. it's evil when used to kill but good when used to dice onions. We live & act-as-if according to our interpretations/beliefs. U can have yours, let others have theirs.
PAUL never acted self righteously after his meeting with JESUS and is an incredible role model to follow [ few can ]
consider that he was beaten near to death/ shipwrecked / bitten by a poisonous snake and eventually beheaded by the romans for preaching the gospel
your ignorance of why you are here and your responsibilities are staggering
to live without GOD in your life is to face eternal torment
this life is where you choose to live in eternity
choose wisely and think about that
That's because it is cherry picking. The LDS Church is not the only Church that has done this. The LDS Church (just like protestants and modern Roman Catholics) have inherited much of the homophobic traditions of the past. Due to the dearth of revelation on the subject, especially through Joseph Smith the prophet, many of the common traditional interpretations and mores have filled the vacuum.
you are adorable! I'd date you in a second. Oh, I've been where you are. Get outta there!
their not they're
Where is "God's true Kingdom?" Jesus said the Kingdom of God is within. When we go "within," finding that place that is still & quiet within ourselves we can know the mysteries of God. There you find your truth, your mysteries about self. What one finds, gay or straight, is God's gift, God's Kingdom and it's none of your/our business which one it is. God gave it to him/her. It's not for you/us to take it away by forcing your/our interpretation of scripture.
Leaders in a church that teaches that a valid legal gay marriage doesn't count is teaching abuse and bigotry. Teaching you should be celibate for your entire life with no one to support and hold you or build a life with isn't healthy and is cruel ... Live a meaningful full life you deserve everything life can offer so don't give up one moment to harmful flawed advice.
These are God's laws that's why we remain celibate.
i suggest you read GOD's word the holy bible and learn the truth
as it is written '' MY people are destroyed through lack of knowledge ''
that knowledge is the knowledge of GOD NOT the world
you think i am judging ?
are you calling GOD a liar ?
do you not know that we are to rebuke the sinner or thier blood is on our heads ?
PLEASE study HIS word and KNOW HIS will and lean not on your own understanding
So we are just to turn our backs on Heavenly Fathers teaching? I have always marveled at the way some folks twist things in an attempt to make there own short comings seem o.k. It is a doubled edged sword. If I don't agree w/ your sin, I am labeled a bigot. If I do agree with your position then I am going against God's instruction. Hmmm? Who wins? Heavenly Father that's who. So we shrink into the world of moral relativism.
@steveissosteve Really? Can you provide us with a reference where Jesus said that? Don't bother with references to adulterers and fornicators because that applies to everyone and I'll just come back at you with "What about gay couples in committed monogamous relationships who may even be legally married?" So yeah...enlighten us with just one scriptural reference where Jesus condemns homosexuality.
Oh, and so the point of this video is...no. Not really. It doesn't get much better?