No Contact Rule For Long Distance Relationships
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 21 เม.ย. 2019
- Get Coach Lee's Emergency Breakup Kit at myexbackcoach.com/emergency-b...
In this video, relationship strategist Coach Lee discusses long distance relationship breakups and no contact. He answers whether or not no contact works in long distance relationships.
Videos mentioned in this video:
Stages Your Ex Goes Through During No Contact: • Stages Ex Goes Through...
Your Ex's Mind During No Contact: • What Your Ex Is Thinki...
Playlist on No Contact: • No Contact Rule
If you were in a long distance relationship and were broken up with, Coach Lee explains how no contact can work for a long distance relationship but also explains the unique pitfalls and issues surrounding a long distance relationship breakup.
Follow Coach Lee on Instagram at / realcoachlee
Follow Coach Lee on Twitter at / leewilsontalks
If you were in a long distance relationship with someone who has broken up with you, it's likely that emotional attraction has fallen. The distance between the two of you is likely what made it fall - even if your ex denies it - but, as Coach Lee points out, that doesn't mean that all you have to do is simply move to where they are to get them back.
Watch the video all the way through as Coach Lee explains the dynamics of a long distance breakup and if the no contact rule will work in this situation.
See the accompanying article to this video: myexbackcoach.com/no-contact-...
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SHE REACHED OUT! I’ve been no contact for 11 days and no joke I was watching another one of coaches videos because after the gym I was feeling kind of down and doubtful on wether or not I should reach out then BAM. Her name popped up on my phone. Not only did no contact work, but it worked for me too. I was in a much better place mentally to be able to talk to her without sounding like a hurt puppy dog. Which what I would’ve done had I not found these videos, or had not realized that no contact is really about YOU.
You were in a long distance relationship?
Whoever breaks up with this guy is in real big trouble
No contact only lasts a day for him. Lol
Haha
ahahahahahahaaaaaaa best comment
Haha
😂 😂 😂 😂 😂
Ok everyone, listen to coach Lee carefully and follow him. If your loved one really loved you, they come back. I got mine back and we are having a wonderful relationship once again. Peace and blessings to all who are in hard times. Stay strong. Thanks coach lee, you are genius.
Are you sure? He came back and then we broke off again. Haven’t spoken since July 25
Very encouraging
how long was your no contact period?
@@dacrazybieber Hello I got my lover back to me with the help of Dr Wilson he helped me return my lover back to me in less than 48 hours he can help you instantly to get your ex lover
@@dacrazybieber Message Him Via Whatsapp
Coach Lee is that one guy who call's his mother to check if she went home safe.
Lol 😂
@@aroojaziz ⁰0
Coach Lee has his mother in no contact.
I'm in long distance relationship breakup and trust me no contact works eventhough you think it is impossible to reconcile with them again... my ex boyfriend is coming back n want to give us a chances! Btw thank you coach lee ❤
Hi good to hear that. How long it took before he wants to reconcile again? I can relate to this. Thanks
@@ghiec.8353 it took almost 2 months.. after he broke up with me i just totally disappear from his life no begging no pleading and try to give him space to think about me and miss me.. get busy with your life and dont think about him too much, you dont lose him he lose an amazing girlfriend like you that he cant replace with anyone remember that.. but no contact only works if you are the dumpee i guess 😞
@@nana0719 Thank you so much. I am the dumpee. After three months of break up and two months of no contact I tried to reach out and he replied immediately asking how am I and my parents, that I should take care of myself always and get enough sleep and rest always. He's also asking if I am still stressed at work. That was 3 days ago. I will just wait for him to initiate contact. I just opened the communication. I just can't stop thinking about him and worried if he has a rebound. 😓😓😓
@@ghiec.8353 dont initiate communication with him, let him start first.. let him feel what a life without you.. dont always be available for him..i always overthink that my ex already has a rebound and if he already with someone else he will realize soon that nobody cant love him like you and he will start to miss the moment with you.. how long was your relationship with him bfore?
@@nana0719 almost 1 year. Long distance, same country 45 mins plane ride. I've met him in person already and spent memorable time with each other.
I wish everyone who watching this video to have your love back again and have a strong bond. Be strong everyone.. if your intention is pure, it works definitely.. no matter how far you both. Universe guides you. Believe it. God bless you all and again I wish to have your relationship soon in best version 💐❤️
Keep you updated what happens I’m in 1 week of NC since she Broke up with me was a wonderful Relationship with no worry’s but all of a sudden boom ..
@@jx10futuristic84 update?
Does it really work? I'm afraid to believe it. Don't want to be the one to have believed just to find out later that she's been sleeping with her new boyfriend while I believed in us. No. I'm tired on this emotions now. I'm tired of carrying this hope. But I can't even give up. God help me man
💐❤
No Contact worked, Thank You
I'm happy for you!
@Kandis J 4 days.....then opened up dialog as to what exactly was going on. Good convo on Sun morning for an hour. Just need time and space, we'll see what happens....
Working on myself, I've learned a lot from what I've listened to and read. Lots to work on, that will take some time.....
Again, thanks to Coach Lee and his guidence through all of this....
Whatever happens I move forward with a better overall understanding of relationships.
@Kandis J Thank you Kandis J.
Best of everything to You
@joe l don't tell her that
Zone Coverage 2019 how long did you stayed in No contact to get your ex back?
Have you monetized your videos? I think you really deserve it, your videos have helped me so much and relaxed me during the worst times. Thank you, Coach Lee.
Me too. And Lees Spotify is great to listen to when driving Thank you Lee
I had your phone call coaching, everything you said I should do, I did it.. the no contact was hard BUT I stuck it out and my ex would use our daughter as a way to reach out. I stuck to the plan I didn’t reach out. The no contact lasted about almost 2 months, then one day he just reached out over our daughter, but ended up talking about the relationship. At that point I was over the relationship. I had no feeling. I just let him talk and say what he had to say. 2 weeks later he was in a very bad accident and the person he had as an emergency was me. I showed up. I ended up helping him through his recovery and healing process.. I still had my boundaries tho, a month later we decided to take it day by day.. and now we’re planning a family trip this coming week for our daughters birthday. He lives 4 hours away. The distance of his move was what brought on the break up, he moved for a better job and I didn’t want to move. So as for now we’re just taking it day by day.. thanks coach lee!
Terrific Ton! I’m sorry for the accident but so glad you’re family is together and taking it a day at a time!
No contact really works, at first i did all the wrong things but then i went no contact & on the 4th day he texted me & i couldn't believe it. We talked for 3 hours & we are back together.
I pray this happens for me
I pray this happens to me too🙏☝️
I'm still with my boyfriend & i pray it works for both of you. I really didn't think we would get back together but i prayed & the no contact after as i said did everything wrong
Keep the faith 😇
@@evahatfield9477 For me it's been 6 days now. I've noticed some behavior, he is checking my statuses, opening up snaps I've sent way before the break up (my ex isnt really active on social media) so I hope these are good signs.
My boyfriend is does not like social media except to text so i would say it is a good sign, where all mine went wrong i told him that i felt he didn't love me anymore so i broke up with him hoping it would wake him up well it back fired on me bc he was so hurt he shut down completely i tried to talk with him & he ignored me for a week & it hurt so bad i called & texted for days finally when i stopped he thought i had moved on, then when he texted me that he missed me my heart skipped a beat. Now we tell each other if something is bothering one of us bc i never want to go through that again , men are just as sensitive as we are i have found out. Don't give up 😇
We are LDR because of this covid
And its one of the reasons why we broke up and its soo hard
reality hurts😔
Same dude
@@tamsin9422 Stay strong bro we can do this
Im still hoping while building up my self in case she won't reach out
Same here
@@gratefulheartmom3209 stay strong ma'am
Everyone in quarantine right now
yeah it's horrible, because my ex girlfriend and i did a lot of plans this summer...
I’m in the same situation with my ex, she had planned to come see me now it’s all over
@@L96_xTeKz1 don't give up! if there was love then it's still there. Breaken up seems to be the easiest way for them now, but feelings doesn't disappear in once...the virus have take a lot away from us so please don't let it take your loved once that easy. it's over when you say it's over.
Jofrey De Graaff thanks for you’re response it’s just what I needed, I know that we had love and it was special! Right now Im thinking many things... I want it to work as I know we would be happy but I have doubts that she wants it to work long term. I’m currently 3 days into no contact. I hope you stay strong too, it’s a once in a lifetime situation and we will all get through this.
My LDR fiance broke up with me last month..she walk away and told me I won't change..
I can't believe we ended it up like that. I just miss him so much, I want to move on because that's what we agreed on but my heart still hurts...
Olivia Ernest I think I understand what you feel😔.
I feel so empty and lonely inside. I just find myself checking her social media to see if she’s active when we don’t talk for days. She says she wants to keep trying but I feel like I’m the only one putting the effort in. I’m not gonna chase her but I wish she’d reach out to me and give me the attention I wanna give her. I thought maybe I should let her go until we can actually get to see each other since It’s not healthy for me to feel sad like this everyday but at the same time I don’t wanna lose her
Your not alone,my relationship ended 2days back just for no reason.he said he lost feelings,its long dt but im hurting.i love him so much
I feel better now, I started talking to other people. He was in another relationship and I felt like I should meet other guys and I did! It just feels like we're just not meant to be! I accepted that, I miss him but I don't want him back
Olivia Ernest Not even joking same thing happened to me. I got over it and I started talking to other girls. I accepted it wasn’t meant to be and I don’t miss her anymore. As a matter of fact I started talking to this other girl but we ended things peacefully. Although I felt like this girl was the one and she may have been, it wasn’t the right time for both of us. Weather the universe wants to bring us together in the future, who knows but I’ve gotta keep moving forward🤷🏻♂️
Axel Salinas I feel the same. But my partner and I broke up 9 days ago. We were in it for 13 months. He’s never acknowledged that I was his girlfriend or anything, he called our situation a pickle, because since day 1, he knew we’d end up this way.
Thank you Coach Lee for discussing long distance relationships and break up's You shed light on some uncomfortable truths I'm one month in no contact and it was difficult at first because we talked everyday and now silence but I'm working on myself
Any updates?
Update Thanks to Coach Lee, I felt that I deserved better than no contact and the Universe listened and brought me a perfect partner, we are getting next month!
Update??
Coach lee sir! You are absoultley right about everything you said in this video. Thank you very much for this information.
Coach Lee, you don't know how much you have helped me during this emotional crisis. The way your face is framed in the video is up close and personal without being intrusive. It shows your sensitivity and experience in handling and helping people in such pain which is sometimes worse than physical. Thank you, sir. Somehow I feel alleviated listening to the tone of your voice which is firm, knowledgeable to some extent comforting. It actually matters when we feel that at the least someone understands what we are going through.
The emergency break up kit was the best $47 I’ve ever spent my entire life!!
I really needed this information.. helped explain why my LTR ended. Thank you, Coach Lee - all makes sense now.
There was a actually so many points brought up in here that I hadn't really thought about or considered which were really helpful. Thanks so much!
You mind to share some of this points?
Thank you Coach. Your insight is invaluable to helping me(us) understand how attachments, childhood conditioning and fear based decisions can be identified and confronted. Each of your videos is great reminder to me and your audience of how to change behaviors that are self-sabotaging.
exactly as i felt on borrowed time from day 1. thanks god I found this one video finally just 2 weeks too late... Long distance relationship is torture.
I'm done fighting fam, I'm gonna be the best version of myself and I am a prize,I tryed going over her place she denied me that,if we ever see eachother and she still wants me she needs to put in some work ,cuz I'm done
Update: she dont need to put any work, just leave em lol. Your better off alone🥳💯
Mr. okay same bro💯
GG KING 👑
2020 Update : Single And Winning 👊🏼🥳💯
@@FutureLegend100 thats epic man! I'm currently going through an ldr breakup myself and I'm kind of lost right now. I hope I get better soon :/
@@frankiesarchives475 the best advice I can give you is keep moving forward, even small steps towards a better you is progress, don't stop even on days you feel you cant keep going, your future self will thank you. No one will look after yourself better then yourself.
My bf was kinda different .. he said if I would fight for us then I could of changed his mind . But I did no contact and he contacted me 3 weeks later . We’re back together
Talk is cheap. He didn’t know how he would react or to what. I’m glad that no contact helped you get back together and, actually, you used no contact to fight for him.
Sounds like a game player... at what age does this shit stop?
His ego was hurt. Thats why
Dalton Galindo yes, I suppose you are right. It’s exhausting
hope he reaches out to me soon...
this guy knows exactly what happens and why things happen...damnn!!
Your videos have been helpful, especially this one. Thank you. It made me realize what I need to work on, thank you for all that you do.
i just want say that i didn't think the no contact rule would work but for me luckily it did and it all eerily played out exactly as Coach Lee said it would. At the start of the break up I was calling and texting i even made the trip to see her face to face and she wanted none of it. i then came across this video when i got back home and stuck to the rules of the no contact rule and seven weeks later she reached out and we are now talking and looking forward to the future together. Thank you Coach Lee I cant thank you enough
so she reached out after 7 weeks?
Coach Lee is the sh**! He truly gives incredible advice.
Guys listen to coach Lee and and lose hope If you still want your ex back....I have been in LDR and this is our 3rd together.....I have been in NC for 5 weeks blocked in all social media and guess what my ex unblocked me yesterday and he reached out....just being slow and casual at the moment....you got this
See my problem was the opposite. I was the one willing to travel. I was the one who always did. He didn’t like the distance .... but didn’t like traveling. Maybe it’s not worth worrying about getting him back.
Me too
Same
my ex came to see me once, i was there far more often on my dime
@@libbynovotny9979 Hello I got my lover back to me with the help of Dr Wilson he helped me return my lover back to me in less than 48 hours he can help you instantly to get your ex lover
@@libbynovotny9979 Message Him Via Whatsapp
Thank you coach. You helped me with my last ex and all your advice worked to the T. We got back together after 5 months of no contact, and while it didn’t work out the 2nd time around, everything you talked about was right. Now I’m currently in a long distance breakup and it’s a different ballgame for sure. He reached out last week after over a week of no contact and unblocked me to say hello and that he hoped I was doing ok. I didn’t respond until 6 hours later (time difference) and just responded cordially and kept on neutral. Haven’t heard from him since and im just keeping to no contact and letting him reach out if he wants to. I learned from my the situation with my last ex
Any update?
Thanks for this video Coach Lee :)
I like Coach Lee's video's. Most sound like he hits the nail right on the head. I was with my ex GF for 3 1/2 years. We lived an hour apart so really only got to see each other 2 - 3 times a month. She did come to my house more than I went to hers probably 60 - 40 because I live out in the country. She broke up with me 5 months ago but had broken up with me 2 other times in the past 3 years. I have been miserable without her.. . I've also broken coach Lee's rule's to many times by breaking no contact and begging and pleading. It's been rough. She finally answered a phone call 4 nights ago and I told her I changed my mind and would move in with her if it would save our relationship. She told me she didn't want to get back together with me and she didn't love me anymore. That pretty much drove a knife thru my heart for good..
Damn bro that’s terrible. How’s it going now?
Thank you Coach Lee! The No Contact Rule really WORKS!!! I would cry, it was so hard, but, you got me through it. I did get the call to come back!!!!
how long was the no contact period? so he finally reached out to you?
@@elissar3580 2 months
Martha Perez-Negrete my LDR was 2 1/2 months we are crazy for each other but fighting a lot because of the distance. We haven’t met. We broke up last week. Is there hope?
@@samarztk do you get back your ex?
Not true. They CAN work. Depends on how dedicated the ppl involved are.
Well said..read my main comment..I sure told this guy..muppet
Yeah me and my ex FaceTimed like everyday she’s 5 hours away and we were together for 7 months hopefully it works
Jonny Barrera okay so I can confirm she does think of you a lot with NC I kinda let go just a bit and I’m letting God handling it but I’m at least trying to be friends (I can’t see her with anyone else it hurts me to think about) but I’m giving it time now
Jonny Barrera Ig so
Limón . update?
Covid destroyed my LDR. I started a new job in March 2020 that would have allowed me to travel and see my partner a lot more frequently and regularly than before. Those dreams were quickly crushed by the pandemic and now I’m trying NC to try and save our relationship. Every day is excruciating but I’m in love and want them back so bad 😭😭
Hi Coach Lee, in my case it was my
ailments. I appreciate your help!
I don't know if u posted this thanks to my comment 2 days ago. But thank you. I will post a question if i have it in the comment
I'm so sad, we never got to meet and moving on makes it even harder. 3 years just gone like that. Hope I will get through this
I feel your pain. 2 years over here and its only been 2 weeks.
2 years talking, never met. It's been 2 weeks 😪
Sorry for your pain
2 years LDR, booked 2 fights hotels to meet her. Had to cancel both. I tried so hard. Guess she wasn't emotionally available
7 months NO contact. I'm doing better day by day. If it's meant to be for us to be together with our exes, then if not it's God's will !!
🙏🙏🙏💕
Same situation. How did things turn out for you?
@@iamthestorm1004how did things turn out?
You are amazing gentleman!!! Thank you very much !!!!!
Coach Lee is the man I have a coaching session set up with him. Excited
The reason no contact is working well for me is because my ex accepted a job in another state . If he was still living in out hometown he wouldn’t even give me the chance not to contact him even though he was the one who initiated the break up. I actually like the fact that we dont live in the same city right now . That aspect is helping me heal from the break up and in a sense forcing him to appreciate me more . Thanks Coach Lee your advice really keeps me going . Thank you for sharing your professional experiences !
How did this end up working out?
LDR .... through knowledge and that heart break , I have changed and rightly so !!! I gained so so much on my own , I actually caught up with everything that deemed doing ! Never seeked anything other than bettering myself ! And ... I’am so thankful for my ex !
Yes ! I do hope she reaches out one day . I’am not sure of any direction if that were to happen tho I’am grateful being words of everything I have acquired from her and that indeed made me who I’am today . So yes at times I think of her . It doesn’t rule me tho now , it simply made me an excellent person ! And for that I’ll always be greatful to her ! Whether she knows that or not ! It’s ok .
I’m one happy guy now because of her !
So be thankful in everything !
@StLazare did she reach out?
thank you for this video coach lee
sorry luka randy coach lee is enough for me .. He is so handsome 😁😁
This annoys the hell out of me because if we would still live in the same place I know I could have gotten back, at least physically and therefore reignite some feeling. There was an open window during the breakup, moments of weakness around Christmas, but of course we could not meet and then she went cold again.
F**** Corona!
I'm not long distance with my GF but we basically operated as such due to having opposite work schedules and subpar living situations that made it very difficult to see each other frequently. I worked really hard for months to get myself a better job, and get myself my own place so we could have more space and have a real relationship. It took almost a year and one of the most stressful periods in my life to pull it off.
Unfortunately a couple weeks after I started my new job and began planning for a place to move into she broke up with me. She said she was tired of trying and doesn't see a future with me. She's figuring out her future as well and is planning on going to college a couple hours away from me. I tried to tell her that I would do anything to make it work, 2 hours away isn't that far. I could drive there and spend the whole weekend with her every weekend and we'd be able to see each other more than we've ever been able to in our entire relationship. We've been dating for almost 2 years and the only time we've been able to spend the night together is a few days total on vacation. But all it did was make her more angry, I could tell she thought it was just an excuse even though I was being sincere.
I don't know how to convince her that it could work other than just backing off for a while and seeing if she'll change her mind.
Very similar situation here, any updates bro?
Wow, just discovered this great channel. You are good with what you do, enriching other people’s lives.
I was in a long distance relationship 7 years ago. My ex broke up with me and we did not contact each other for that Period of time. I didn’t get closure from that relationship.
Then a few days ago, on new year’s day, he contacted me. We talked things through, reminiced about old times. suddenly one day he said how it would be difficult for us to get back together as my life is so full now with so much going on. I then realized i didn’t want him back now, as he had just finished with another lady. Wonder if i will feel different in a few months time.
I needed this 👍❤️
Sir only one video on long distance relationship please upload more videos in this topic or long distance relationship ex back series ND what are the positive point on long distance relationship , love from India
Tough when you're in two countries and don't have plans for each other in the near future... I guess the two of us didn't like the other deep enough that we were willing to throw back what we have and start a completely blank life in an alien place... But I do miss him, a lot.
My ex wished me happy Valentine's day,during no contact rule.
Monono Khune Mine too! Simple “hey just wanted to say happy valentines”
Like wtf is that
❤It does work coach lee u are the best
I literally begged my husband to assist me with paperworks so I can be a full time wife for him (not 90 days on off situations due to the limitation on my visa). Instead his response was: we’ll see, if you behave well in the next 3-6 months i’ll consider the paperworks.
Had lots of things on my plate already due to work shifting during pandemic time, his response lead to a severe depressive episode. He could not handle that because he said the responsibilities are way too big for him to handle if there’s something happen to me.
He asked for a separation and I said I didn’t want it. Now it’s been almost a month aince we talk to each other. I’m focusing on my recovery (physically and mentally) and getting through a lot of therapies to get over with.
Your videos are really lighting up the days when they feel so dark for me. Thank you so much!
Ps. I do really love your hair colour! I sent a screen capture of your hair colour to my stylist so he can give me the same hair colour in the next few weeks 😊
"So why say goodbye? What are we sorry for?
I have lived a magnificent life
because I really knew how to do it
If you hear: I died,
- don’t believe it.
Because it’s something I don’t know how to do.
Love is the only air I’ve ever breathed
and laughter the only language in the world that I understand
I have just dropped by on this earth, to give you a wink.
To leave something behind
like a fluttering trace.
Therefore, don’t be sad.
The only thing I care for is
to remain silly in your eyes and strangely dear to your heart.
At night, when you look up to the sky,
you give me a wink too
let it be a secret.
In spite of gray days,
when you see a comet turning the horizon red,
remember: its me
still silly flying and living." - An Immortal Poem , M.A.
I watch this whenever I am engulfed with sadness and loss. I started NC and he texted after 4 days. It was a very casual chat like how,s the weather etc. Then I continue NC again. I cant do or decide anything now due to the lock down and we cant meet up anytime soon. It will take another at least 4-6 months before I or he is allowed to travel. And I am still reflecting . Trying to picture our future together. We are not young couple. There'll be lots of sacrifices to make to be together. The love for each other must be super strong to eventually make that sacrifices and be together.I thought I didnt love him enough. I was looking forward to breaking up but he beat me to it. It has been a week now and I am still hurting. I am still figuring out whether I am sad for the loss of something familiar or for the loss of love. If only someone is kind enough to talk to me. I am hurting.
Same situation sis. I feel you💔
Mine is worst actually. He got engaged in just less than a month. He is from Saudi and he was pressured by his family to get married. We been together for 2 years. I can still feel he loves me. He messaged me and told me to let him build me a future for me. I can't . I don't want anything from him but himself. I'm so hurt.
Thank you so much.Its help full !! I learn a lot now. not to call or text..I have Been text and call once he don't responed I should back up.
We spent a total of 90 hours together, but most of those hours were of us talking on FaceTime.
I believe it can work,if they both wanted it to.
soo True............ every time i came back to him for 6 month in the year 1st Month was a honeymoon......... then followed with the coldness and a silent treatment
god help me why im still in love............. with this soul mate........... 9 years after..............i should feel i deserve it............i actually feel our long distance....... have saved our
relationship........ cause up close and personal we both acted none committed........... he left me up right and left any time he can abandonment me and i have acted out the same
due to revenge feelings or not.......... Universe........... is not against us....... but trying to set up what we are able to face........and sadly....... it was only that much.......
I was in a LDR. it’s been 55 days. This is the second time I’m watching this particular video. Im losing hope.
This makes me so sad
I’m trying no contact rn I hope this works cuz I’m hurting
Dylan M. I feel like it doesn’t bro :/
Don’t worry man listen these videos help but only for a certain amount of time but honestly you want something permanent so listen to me when I tell you go to religion whatever religion you believe in resort to that trust me it helps much more.
Dylan M. update?
a bced it worked you are just going to have some trust issues
Dylan M. It does
Hey Coach Lee, can you make a video about the guy initiating No Contact first?
Last week a guy I liked blocked me on every messaging platform with no warning, even though we'd been friends for 5 months and voice called every day for about 4-5 hours a time. He blocked me a week before my flight to his country, where we were planning to hang out.
I know self improvement should be a constant regardless of who initiates NC but I'm curious to hear about what the likelihood of him coming back is, or about what we should be doing about social media in that time, etc.
Thank you! Love your videos!
Veronica Sofia Nitu yes same thing is happening to me now!!!! Pls help😭
@@sarahjane6494 Girl he ended up unblocking me, messaging me to apologize, and I took that opening to block him everywhere myself so he couldn't contact me anymore. Went NC ever since, been minding my own business and to be honest with you, it's been a massive relief.
My advice to you is that if he's acting like an asshole, he is one and he's not worth sticking around for. Move on to something better
Veronica Sofia Nitu I mean... some people have emotional issues that cause them to act in erratic and irrational ways, doesn’t mean they are being “an asshole”.
I started dating this girl i December. We dated for a month and build a really nice connection. She lives in another country. We met there, but in the beginning of Jan I went home for different reasons. Our connection still got stronger and stronger in my view, even though we were apart. About one month ago the replies started to slow down on her part. A few days later we talked and she said our connection was fading away, and that she’s unsure about us getting together again. The confusion was total for me because it all was good until she basically started ghosting me. Now, I understand the disadvantage in dating one month and being apart for two.
Now I’m back in her country for work. I’ve sent one text saying I made it back despite covid. No reply. Now I’ll be silent until (and if) she reaches out. Wish me luck
Omg i was doing the no contact rule for 3 week and i saw this with long distance relationships and wrote an text to my ex now i am the meaning of life! This really works
Can u explain ?
@@karankumarofficialid sure we broke up at the end 😂
@maryambalouchkhosravi851 😂
She told me when we met she was okay with me being a truck driver. Now all of a sudden she isn't. She left me for someone else that she had been chasing for years. She turned cold and sent me packing. Left me homeless after asking me to move in.
I was in a somewhat long distance relationship. We saw each other once a week. We lived only 60 miles apart which isn’t bad compared to most LDR. I didn’t care, I was always willing to make the trip every week and she was too..but then things changed and it seemed like she wanted something more convenient. I always tried to prove that it was worth it, because she was worth it (before she changed) and I was willing to move out to her area but in the end, she just distanced herself and broke up with me. Day 54 since the break up and NC.
My girlfriend lived an hour and 15 minutes at first it was only once or twice a week n the last 4 months together i would stay at her house alot but when we were not together we were texting alot but it became too much for her. When i was texting alot more than her. Probably pushed her away n me being too nice and putting her first n doing everything she wanted. I helped her move and was supposed to stay with her during the week and 2 days later she wanted a break for the weekend i gave her 5 days n it got to the point where i wasn't patient enough and felt like she was stringing me along. She basically told me she doesn't love me anymore n wants to focus on herself and get her life together and will contact me whenever it happens. Which I'm not holding her to that but at least we didn't end on bad terms but today is day 5 no contact and haven't heard a peep from her since.
@@ryancoburn6607 what happened now? please update?
@@ryancoburn6607 update
went through somewhat of the same thing..
I usually watch your videos for encouragement, this one was less encouraging...😅
I can’t believe I’d write this comment, but after 6 month he reached out to me, even being on long distance.
Thank you to Coach Lee for saving my dignity❤ …I now know we are not for each other but staying NC is the key.
I don’t feel like responding to him even though Coach Lee recommends to answer in general “let me know when you are in my city” - I’m not planning to 😂
Hey Coach lee, I really like your videos and I started watching them a lot recently. My ex suffered bad with depression, she said she wants to work on herself for me and ensured she loves me. Im not sure what to make of this. I started NC for a few days, after talking EVERYDAY almost hours and hours for over a year and a half. Am I doing the right thing by going no contact? Can you do a video on depression and why people leave?
Updates?
@@AimedWolf Relationship is over. But not because of depression. Both went our separate ways mutually, wished each other the best.
Ultimately we just weren't compatible. If you have to keep going NC then the relationship probably isn't worth it.
Today is my 3rd day of no contact, and we are long distance. To be honest I don't think we'll ever talk again it's just a gut feeling. God has other plans for me.
Whatever you believe
Any update ?
God does
What happen?
Update?
We're dating on and off for two years. We kept breaking up because of two hours distance driving and work schedule. I had to move to a less expensive city, and he's the one with the good job and kids. I'm a widow with kids so I'm not beholden to an ex. I took the plunge and moved closer. We'd broken up two months before. I expected nothing. At first when I needed something I asked him lightly "would you like to do me a favor?" And it slowly built from there... doing errands together, small excuses to get together during his lunch, etc.. slow and cautious. With a time balance.. so far so good. But here's the caveat: every time we struggled with time commitment when we were far away I'd known it wasn't because of a fight or because of no attraction. It was the opposite, extreme attraction with the frustration of distance. I also had to accept before I moved that maybe we wouldn't be together at all.
I also had major problems with the apartment I was moving out of and he handled many arguments with my landlord that I never expected him to help with.
Is it where I want yet? No. We're both cautious. But he's stepping up, helping me with furniture and putting my resume out there.
Thanks Coach !
thank you coach lee i’ve been hurt by the same girl 3 times and she lives 45 minutes from me tells me she still loves me but the relationship is not what she wants
That's very interesting that most are in long distance relationships like me. He pursued me from a distance in 2014 and is now saying he won't close the gap and move.
Same... and so he bailed. 4 years gone. 😞
@@majormoku same with me ..we been in a relationship 5 yrs and he is there every day but recently have been very distant and sometimes vague in his conversation with me and when I kept asking him about it he hot angry and we argued I hot angry and hung up ..he has not contacted me since..I texted him explaining myself and apologizing. But nothing from him ..not sure if he just ignores my last 2 text or turned off his read receipts..I miss him but I'm trying no contact ..😔
@@barbarashyamaleechong8754 I know it's hard. I've not talked to him in a month now. I'm just trying to work on myself and heal... at this point things are out of my hands. I hope you find some calm and peace.
@@majormoku Thank you ..yeh I'm trying to focus on me too ..its been almost 2 weeks and He has done this before..but never for this long....lets see...
Me to he pursued it with me to.😐he went after me!2014 is it the same guy😅😅😅😃
So true i was in a ldr for nearly 2 years not good please people it doesnt work. Save yourself the heart ache focus on yourself and allow someone to come into your life who is near you and not in another country. Believe me im going through some serious heart ache atm. Take my advice dont do it. Its a rare thing if it works
omg thank you so much for this bideo
Thank you for this video! A lot of it applies directly to my situation. Broke up about 4 months ago because she said we'd drifted apart. I pleaded at first but had been in no contact for a while. I knew she had surgery planned beginning of May, so a couple of weeks ago I messsged to ask how she was and if she fancied meeting for a drink, which she seemed open to. However when I messaged again to set a day to meet she said she'd thought about it and didn't feel it was a good idea. Feel like I'm back at square one! 😔
Sorry to hear that
It was long distance relationship I did not know he was married when I found out I dumped him
My Long-Distance ex-GF broke up with me 18th of December (6 years relationship), and I cried and begged for many days and asked her to be honest with her thoughts about it. We have always been honest and trusted eachother and she pointed out a few things after I desperately wanted explanations. It came as a shock for me, she has been thinking of breaking up for 6 months and didn't tell me anything, neither did she hint about it, so she tried to hold on as long she could, since she really didn't wanna leave me. But it happened, and she cried with me over the phone that she never wanted to hurt me etc. We have never ever fought or argued with eachother and had insanely good chemistry and minds. There was a few things she pointed out that made her "lose her feelings/attraction" for me and I said I am sorry and wanted to get rid of that attitude. (I might have had some strong opinions on stuff and too judgemental, but never something against her.)
We had a focus on being healthy and tried diet and stuff, and I might have pushed her too hard on that and I said I regret taking it so seriously, that I always have been happy for who she is, no matter how her soul and body look like.
Anyways, after I begged she was willing to have a pause to think about it, but it could take months she said, but I was too desperate and texted her 2 weeks after breakup that I wanted more clear answers.
She said "if you want and answer now, it has to be a no. I am 100x sorry but I need to find myself, I don't feel happy anymore and no feelings for you, although I love the person you are. You are the best person I know on this planet and you have infinite good sides about yourself."
She didn't want the same as me anymore "move into a house, live together etc" because having a relationship is a fulltime job, and she is working fulltime and is studying at the same time. She have gotten new friends (colleagues) and they hang out some times and I understand that she want that, since my emotional attraction fell. She wanted to be alone. But she says she still loves me as a person and care very much about me. She wanted us to still keep in contact since she likes me, but I said that would be very hard for me to do after having a 6 year relationship with her, so I would rather not keep you as a friend, and that I will never forget her and that I am sorry.
The distance was never a problem though, only 1,5 hour drive and we saw eachother every month.
1st of January I said
"I am sorry for texting so much about it, and that we shouldn't communicate with eachother for a while, but if she has something important it is fine.
Not only because of your sake, but I am going to spend alot of time on myself as well, make a better version of myself, both mentally and physical. And I am also sorry if you regret this in the future, maybe I don't want a relationship either when that time comes. I hope I do, but it can happen. Good luck, love you."
She answered that it comforts her that I will work onmyself and she has everything I told her in her mind and said good luck and that she loved me as well. (not in a romantic way I guess)
Since then, I have started No-Contact, the time moves so slow in my head. It's painful. I feel like I fucked this up completely. I discovered this channel way too late.
@Coach Lee, your videos calms me down. Thank you. If I ever get my ex GF back I will PayPal directly to you. I watch your videos everyday.
ok so i met this girl, we went on many dates and hangout alot etc, then she moved to another city for 2 years but before she left we agreed to be exclusive and try long distance.
we facetime/texted everyday until i went to visit her 25 days later, we went on more dates, talk about our feelings said ''i love u'' many times and became bf/gf or she told me in her mind we already was, cuz when people asked her she said she had a bf.
1 week ish after i come home she facetime me crying saying she cant do long distance cuz its to hard for her + with being in a new city, new study and trying to make new friends.
she told me she she needs time to settle there and that she loves me and hope we find our way back to eachother since we were so good for eachother and everything felt so natural and real.
and if she didnt move we would have worked out she said.
now almost 1 week after she told me this, im trying rlly hard to give her space but my mind is going INSANE cuz i rlly loved her and it sucks that its not me but the distance she cant do.
it would have been easier if she just didnt love me..she comes back in december for 3 weeks should i try to meet her idk..any advice? shouldi conctact her after 30days of no contact ?
Can u make more videos on long distance breakups
How long would you say to go no contact before contacting them as per what you said on 14:10? 4 weeks (30 days)? 3 weeks? Thank you.
Hi coach Lee.
I was with my ex girlfriend for a year and we were totally in love. But unfortunately she was 24 and I was 41.. we have so much in common and connect well. But a few times over the year we argued about her wanting to travel.. thus only came out when we were drunk. I said if you’re going travelling we need to break up. She cried and never wanted to. Fast forward a year and she got offered a job on a yacht whilst seeing her more privileged friends in France. It was a take it or leave it and start within a week job.. when she got back she told me and said she wasn’t sure how long she’d be and wanted to do a bit of travelling too. I broke up with her because she couldn’t give a deadline. She wanted to do a long distance relationship but I said no.
She cried hysterically for days before she left.. we both were crushed. It’s been a month now and I still think about her. She was finding reasons to contact me but I said I don’t do “friends”after a breakup.
She then contacted me making chit chat.
I ignored her as it was too painful to keep in touch. She said she would of been loyal but I know with the passing of time feelings and loyalties fade.
She may be back in 6 months or more.. or less.. or maybe never as she was fed up with her job and had no friends of her own where we/I live.
I’ve been no contact but I don’t know what to do long term.
I really want to be with her again once she’s got this out of her system.. as she wasn’t ready to commit properly because she needed to travel and hebe some experiences first.
What do I do?
Find someone the same age.
Exactly. What are you at. She’s young enough to be your daughter anyway and wants different things from
Life. She will get over the crying believe me when she meets lads her own age. Do her a favour and let her go.unless you want to end up being her papa.
I'll never try another LDR...if 3 hours is considered long distance. But this is hell on earth. I pray for us all.
I noticed the conversations we had had started to get boring a week before we broke up and I didn’t see it before and he felt I wasn’t listening to him and now I feel really bad because I realize I was responding without any real input and it probably felt cold. He decided we’re incompatible, now I don’t know what to do or if he’ll miss me that much. He still loved me I believe
Give us an update im in this situation.. Im dying
I came here looking for advice on what to do. I got mostly negatives out of it tbh...
It’s sucks but it’s the truth
Please do more of these
I was in a 8 month long distance relationship. My ex gf lives in Poland and me in USA. We met online and then once in person during the summer. I wasn’t working for some time because i was prepping for law school. When i returned I got busy with law school felt overwhelmed and ended up breaking up with her. Something I never thought I’d do because I loved her but it did feel like she was too needy. Anyway, we got back together within a few days but me doing that changed our dynamic. We argued a lot. She felt i wasn’t listening to her and it was true. So she would yell and lash out to me (she was also bi polar and maybe borderline too) then one day she broke up with me. I accepted it at the time as I thought it was best. She kept speaking to me after and we spoke almost as if we were together saying I miss you and so on. I even re booked a ticket to see her for winter break. I didn’t want to get back together during this time. Wanted to see her in person. She kept saying she missed me then changed about a month before my trip to see her. I got jealous and she hated it and said we were just friends (i feel she met someone) i flew all the way to Poland for her to meet me and say we will never be together and that my feelings made her uncomfortable. I begged once while i was there but she left me alone in this country after i landed. It was cruel. She was different. Looked at me as if she never had any feelings. The last time i went it was bliss. I really felt we loved each other but I guess it was stronger for me because I have been so broken up crying every night. I can’t believe i flew to another country for her and she didn’t feel anything for me. Unfollowed all my social media. I did text her once during the time i was there and she said she regretted she gave met her new number. (Thats what i meant i begged) stopped messaging her. It’s been 2.5 weeks. I can’t believe she did that to me. I’d never do this to someone unless they cheated or were abusive to me in the past. She had her Ig private and then un did it a few days ago and I believe i saw her with another girl. Not sure but i think so. I’m so depressed because even though i did what i did and broke up that time. I still loved and still love her. This was the most intense I felt for someone . I’m sure she doesn’t care for me at all after how she acted. That’s another level of no caring. Knowing someone you claimed you used to love traveled to see you and you meet them there first day in the country and abandon them. During Christmas and new year by the way. I felt so alone but it’s my fault ? Because she wanted me to not accept the breakup it seemed. I let her go. I hate myself currently.
@coach lee may i ask if after no contact we still in touch , from distance , hot and cold , & then no contact , what should happen after no contact when there is a connection starts again ? its really important and its from a distance , we was married & dated each other for a year almost
Dont ever want my Ex Back
My girlfriend of two years broke up with me a couple months ago after 5 months of long distance due to college (and I go to a military service academy so I can’t just get on a plane and see her when I please). Sucks big time. When I first came home for Christmas and saw her, which was about a month after the breakup, we actually had a couple really good days together and it felt like normal. We both said we really loved it and it was looking up. A couple days later she broke my heart again saying we should just be apart. I went full no contact, she texted me on Christmas Eve and Christmas, and then the other day she asked if we wanted to see each other before I go back to school and I agreed. So we’re getting dinner tomorrow and I fly back across the country the next morning. I’m so nervous and don’t know what she’s gonna say, as she was clearly wanting to see me before I go back. And I know we’re back to what made us break up in just a couple days. We were so good together but maybe we just need to grow up some more.
Also, my older brother and his girlfriend survived this exact situation (I go to the same school he did). 4+ years of long distance. They’re the anomaly, but I still have hope for me because our relationship was so good and I know I’m a catch in her eyes. Wish me luck.
I know of a powerful man who help me bring back my Ex in just 2days after many years ago
Just message him now on WhatsApp and your problems will be solved within 2days
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She said that it will never worked and push me away...i respect her decision i guest i will take the no contact and move on... Thank you coach lee i hope it will work the no contact rule
Update
What if I and my ex both are watching this Video and we would apply the same rule to each others 😭? Then no one would break the rule to connect to the other?
its said if youre the one who dump you should contact and if you are the 1 who get dump you should wait
The dumper does no contact? For what 😂
😂😂was also thinking the same thing
In another video, coach says wait for a specific amount of time (he’s got a video) and after that passes, then contact because you have nothing to lose at that point. And no, you don’t contact to get closure. You have closure. You contact to see if they give you a chance.
Dear Coach Lee, I followed your instructions, your advices worked in the end, but now I spoilt it and dont know what to do, I think there is no way anymore to fix it. Our situation is actually VERY VERY special. I checked and cant get any earlier call with you than in June, is there any way please how to get in contact with you earlier?I totally killed it with wrong steps recently :( Thank you
Coach, thank you for the video. What if we cannot see each other anytime soon, will there a chance of getting back together? I'm in a country which is heavily affected by Covid-19, i think it will take many months until one of us can travel to see the other.
I was with my long distance relationship for 8 years only meeting each other once or twice a year. However, we ft every day but covid made it very difficult to meet over that’s 2 years.
I tried reaching out when I was in his city on vacation and he avoided seeing me. I don’t know why he responded at all if he wasn’t interested
Coach Lee, I was in a long distance relationship, but it did not start out that way. He ended up moving. He only lasted 3 days in long distance even though he was the one that was more big on it than I was. I am going to his town in a month for vacation with family.
Even though it is just a month, should I still reach out? I don't know when I will get another chance to meet face to face.
couch lee i was in a realtionship with my gal since 5 years and before dat v had relationship n v brokeup too for a year she cme back to me previously but this tym v are in a long distance relation ship from 4 years the first 3 years was so beautiful in in long distance v were always tgther through social media * the strange thing is that this tym i find her to be least bothered bot me after few fights and then i made the matter worse by fight back again n again now she broke up with me couple of mnth back and she stoped toking over phone n also avoid me after she got new job n she behave wiered this has happened before also first time wen v broke up n v were crush for each other since school tyms v knw each other since long time now she is even making me jealous showing up with other guys after break up . every vecation v use to plan few days for our private vacation then she sees her family but now its been 1 year since v met n i kept reacting for these 2 mnths of breakup really bad n shwed m weak by breaking no contact n fighting her for shwing up with other guys now is der neway u can guide me
Was never in a relationship. Just a one side emotional ride. Talked on phone with him for hours. Although we both didn’t confess, we had the vibes like we were emotionally connected. He cut off communications suddenly and wouldn’t answer my calls or return my texts. But eventually I found out (through a common friend) that he said it was all a misunderstanding. I had tried begging pleading all that I shouldn’t have done - for 9 months. Then decided to go no contact for 4 months. But broke the no contact on his birthday. He replied to that almost instantly, after having ignored all my previous messages of 9 months. I was like woahhh 😂 But I didn’t respond back (May I should have?). Went no contact again. But then he regularly started checking my WhatsApp status. 🤷♀️