You know what really gets me about letting go of my fantasy selves: the money I spent on those things. I feel SO GUILTY about the fact that I spent $100s, maybe even into the $1000s on my fantasy self items (and there is a lot... I made a list). That guilt keeps me in this constant state of anxiety from all the things I have piled on myself
I have been watching your videos for a long time. I loved the fantasy self one. I look back at my past and realize I actually did so many things. I went to college, was on a daily tv show, raised three daughters and one grandson. I was a single working mom for 50 years. I homesteaded for a while, although that word was not used then. I took care of my parents and adult children, I am still their sounding board. I took dancing lessons and learned to swim at the Y. I sewed and made all our clothes and later made charity quilts and other crafts to sell. I am an artist and sing in the choir. I look back at all the things I have done, although I did not do them at the same time. I feel grateful for all these experiences, at 75, I’m still very active, I’m still an artist, have lunches with my circle of friends. I am on a continuous minimalism journey, simplifying my life and enjoying every moment. I was a widow young, so most things I did alone. My life at times seemed like a roller coaster, but I always took a little time to take care of myself. I think that is key. It is also key to setting an example for my children.
Only recently as I retire (😂) have I discovered this little nugget - I can have anything, but I can’t have everything. I can do anything, but I can’t do everything. I can be anything, but I can’t be everything. And knowing what I know now, I would not want it all anyway.
I don’t have time to quilt but I can sew buttons. I don’t have time to be an urban homesteader but I can fill a couple grow pots and try zucchini and tomatoes on the back deck. I’m no master baker but I like to ‘pantry bake’ (I have enough stuff to make ginger molasses cookies year round) once in a while. This is a good reminder of how much I really have while having soooo much less stuff.
I'm one of the people who was so affected by your fantastic self video. My fantasy self included entertaining friends so I have collected & stored all the kitchen paraphernalia that goes with hosting dinner get-togethers. I now realize that I no longer have the time/energy/desire to entertain more than a couple of dinner guests at a time. So, I have decided to invite single friends & couple friends for dinner & to let go of all the entertaining paraphernalia that I now find so encumbering. I have also decided to get rid other things I'm not using like my cross-stitch supplies, my fine China set, most of my gardening pots, & all the other items being stored but not being used. Last week I gave away a huge bag of fabric scraps. I find it freeing. Thank you!
I don’t know if you read from notes as you talk to us but if you do you certainly cover it up well. It appears that you just have a talent of talking “off the cuff “ but making it flow as if this conversation just comes from you naturally. So many use extra words ,like uhh and right? and ya know? You are pleasant to the ears. I look forward to your posts. Donna
Thank you so much Donna! I appreciate that. I've been working hard to not use filler words, but I know I still use "and so" too often. My first videos are painful to watch. 😂
These videos about the fantasy self have helped me so very much. Thank you for giving everyone permission to let go of things. Not just physical things but things that are taking up space in our heads.
Can relate to this so much. It's so important to be content and confident in the place God has placed us. Dreams may not change but the way to reach them may. Ultimately the most important thing is to follow His will in our lives.
Thank you so much for making me fully realise that I have a wonderful full life. I have now known a few years without anxiety - Such a relief! I had been juggling too many balls for far too long. I will be 65 (female) in August and at last know what is important and what is not 🙏👊
I used to put so much pressure on myself to be the "perfect" parent, spouse, etc...and was so busy doing the items on the list (I created in my head) to check off. After decluttering so many things from my house, I slowly realized I had to also declutter my fantsy-self's calendar, social media, obligations, expectations, and toxic relationships. I love your channel. It has given me the confidence to know and remember that what I did in my life was a good thing.
That is one of the best concepts that helps me let go of the toughest de cluttering projects for me. Hobbies, clothes, cookbooks and supplies - thank you!
O… M… GOODNESS. 😵💫🥺😭😭😭 I am certainly one who GREATLY appreciates and favors that most popular ‘Fantasy Self’ video… but the impact I felt from watching that now pales in comparison to what I am feeling at this moment. I can’t thank ‘Tova’ and ‘Jen B’ enough for putting my angst into painfully honest, thought-provoking words. Angst I couldn’t define. Couldn’t admit to. *Wouldn’t* admit to. I honestly haven’t felt that “Today is the first day of the rest of your life” feeling in quite some time, but it’s in me… all warm and tingly… It’s NOW. I’m forever grateful to our Lord for you… for your willingness to be relatably transparent… for your phenomenally beneficial heart talks… for just the sweet, oddball sister in Christ that you are. ✊♥️
Rachel... Thank you so much for being so honest about how nurturing the relationship with your children doesn't come naturally to you. 🙏🏻 This is my experience as well, and sometimes I feel really guilty about it. I have to be very mindful and intentional about it. (Think of questions to ask them and set aside actual time to be present.) I love my kids more than anything in the world, as I know you do as well, but the relationships are something I have to really consciously work at. Thank you for this video. I think that this has impacted me more than any of your others, and that is saying something! (Because I love and appreciate all of your content.) Sincerely, thank you! 🙏🏻❤️
Thank you for these videos it makes it easier to share them with my 12 year old daughter who has trouble letting go of her fantasy self in art. She is very artistic and wants to try everything. She is narrowing down with the question "If I have 30 minutes what do I want to do?" Realistically this is our life with 3 under 3 years old. Little pockets of time that we can use to feel joy and fulfillment in the every day.
I used to read the Proverbs 31 woman and just sigh knowing it was too high of a bar. But I heard someone say what you said, she doesn't do it all at one time, but in and out of seasons of life. Good word.
“Taking a look at ourselves, what we want out of our lives and then releasing all the things that don’t help us do that, that don’t help us live that way or accomplish the things that we want to. Look at all the stuff you have in your home that support all these different ‘variations’ of you. Is that stuff helping you with your ultimate priorities?” Focus on the things you really want to do right now. So, I also understand that every time you/I saw that stuff just sitting there it was shouting at you/me and probably made you/me feel bad about yourself/myself - no one needs that pressure. Glad you were able to let-stuff-go. As I age I struggle with my “previous” self. I loved living in the country, raising horses and my children, but made the decision to leave the “place I loved” (marriage I didn’t) for the safety of myself and my young children and moved to the city. I always thought/hoped I would be able to return to that kind of life when the children were grown, but had to accept the fact that that kind of life would be too difficult for me now. A few years ago I sold my English saddle and boy was that a struggle as it brought up memories (not all bad) but I had to feel the pain, accept the disappointment and continue to become content with my life. I realize daily that I have so much to be thankful for.❤
Keeping relationships with people does take time. I’m trying to do better with this, but it’s so hard for me. I’m naturally an introvert and really enjoy spending time alone and “hobbying.”
That's wonderful Katie! Isn't it interesting that when we let go of the excess that we collected to define us, that we can feel more authentic? I love it. ❤️
Excellent video! I got rid of the organized fantasy homeschool mom. I was addicted to “planners” planning out the whole school year of all the things we were going to do, and all things we would be doing all the things! It doesn’t work that way! Life happens, and it took me 14 years of homeschooling to finally realize that I can’t keep up to those expectations! I got rid of 10 planners yesterday. Now we just do the things and I write down the things we did. It’s ok if we didn’t finish the lapbook, or get to math. We just loop to do those the first thing the next day. Huge weight lifted off my shoulders! This is what I have learned from your Fantasy videos. Thank you! ♥️
Aha, good one !! from watching this video the light went on for me ... and now will give away a piece of "fantasy self" ... and not grieve it :) thank you, again 💖
Yes! I needed to be reminded of this. I have slowly let go of things that I held onto for the “future me”. The “future me” appreciates realistic expectations :) They still try to creep in though so I have to be mindful of it.
Thank you for being honest and open. This video has really resonated, even more than the previous fantasy self video. Not sure if it's timing or what. Thinking of my life as seasons has completed changed my thinking. I can release the guilt of not being able everything all the time. I am reevaluating what I really want for "the right now me". So thank you so much!!!!
YES - I needed this refreshing reminder. I went back and watched the Fantasy Self Video to get reinforced, recharged. I've been putting off cleaning out my 2nd bedroom/catchall room for a while. It's time to deal with it and the motivation from these videos will certainly help. I think a reminder to watch the Fantasy Self videos would be welcomed by many of us, certainly me. Thank You...
Thank you for doing this video. It has provoked some deep thought into my life and what is holding me back! You are a blessing to me! Oh, and I really like your hair this length! Very cute!
Rachel - you are speaking directly to my heart. I constantly need to remind myself what it is I truly want, but it does get easier to just let the non-important stuff go. You are right - time is so fleeting and when you start to recognize this it puts everything into perspective pretty quickly!
I have a friend she's a senior, but when she was raising her kids, it was amazing how she handled her life. I couldn't follow the schedule she had. But she told me that she lived by her calendar. Sunday to sunday, she always had some day that she stayed with for a certain task, and she never deviated from that. For was Her house cleaning day on Tuesday was her laundry day. Wednesday was her baking day, where she made bread , cakes and cookies, and everything that needed for a week. Etc Friday was their shopping day. Saturday was their entertainment day , and they went out and did something as a family, and Sunday was the day that they would have friends over. If they wanted or just chill out and so there was a very strick's schedule and her house was immaculate.. But your mother was like that, so that is where it began. For example, she got up at 6 AM, did her own thing, had a coffee, and by 7 she started breakfast at 7:30. The kids got up and made their beds brush their teeth. Wash their teeth wash up and got dressed and came to the breakfast table. They had their morning discussion, and the kids walked to school because they were so close and mom cleaned . And that was on a regular basis Monday to Friday. And I asked. Her? How when the world do you do it? Your house is spotless and she says my husband helps out by picking up his mess, and every1 of us is responsible . If they got the newspaper, she would read it her husband would come home and read it, and then it would go right to recycle immediately. She also worked with her husband in the evening as a janitor, and the kids helped out by emptying the garbage, taking go garbage out, and doing. Some dusted when they were old enough. They had a garden and she would do the canning and she would do repairs on the clothing for sewing. And she knew exactly what time the kids would be home and what they should be expected when they got home, et cetera, so it was a family that I really did. Highly died because she was kind to her husband they were a great family. They got along, and now, even to this day, the kids are the same way. But it's all to do with sticking with a schedule and getting up at the same time every day. And I said to her, "What if some unforeseen events happen?" She says you have to be prepared for some of that sometime. And another thing every monday evening, they would have a family get-together from six thirty to 8thirty,
I got a little card with a quote and though I normally pass those things on, this one I kept. It says, "You can do anything, but not everything." I needed that and this. Thank you!
As a mother we wear so many (hats) that we can loose sight of wants important in your life. We’re so busy with doing it all ,that we forgot to just let go of the extra things not important right then. Your videos remind me how I tried to do it all and there’s not enough time .Hind sight is 20-20 being a senior I look back at how hard it was with all the clutter.Thank you
I needed to hear this today. Have been struggling and feeling pulled between reality and fantasy. A great reminder of why I am decluttering. Thank you xx
Rachel, you share your story with such honesty and clarity, which has been very helpful to me. Thank you for this one especially. I so enjoy your videos and am grateful you continue to make them.
Love this topic! I so needed to hear it. I do get a bit stuck in the process of letting go and thinking I should sell off some of these unused things. It compounds the feelings of guilt over the money spent on fantasy hobbies that I never did.
One of your best videos yet (although I love them all)! The need to live intentionally is so underrated and not nearly discussed enough. When you're at the end of your life, it's too late for regrets. Amen! Thank you!
I had to chuckle when you said keeping relationships with so many is hard.....it is!! So far I have five in-loves plus 20 grandchildren plus the original seven kids. It IS hard!! But, oh, so important!
Thank you so much for sharing all of this from your life, being so personal, and explaining it so well! I have been learning this same lesson on my minimalist journey. What is truly important in my life, what gives it meaning, and relationships are at the top of the list. It makes it much easier to clear out the fantasy stuff once you can define what is truly important. Being able to TRULY love my family, even when it's hard, has brought me far more peace and satisfaction then any of my fantasy selves could. Love all of your messages, thanks again for sharing this one! ❤🤗
Wise words! As a fairly new (almost) empty nester (one child at home) and grandmother (my daughter has had 3 children in the the last 5 years) I totally identify with what you said about time to spend time with family. The desire to 'be present' and also the fact that when you have to arrange to meet up or they have to check you'll be in when they are free to visit. Its much more complicated and takes more time than when you are all at home permanently. Precious times though.🥰
Thank you Rachel , you are a wonderful person. Im a momma 8 kids and homeschool them ,I can relate that it is so time consuming but the most important thing to nourish relationships with my children. I recently had to give up some ministries I was involved in because I wasn't being as available to my kids As I wanted to be. Cooking healthy meals is also something I enjoy for me and is important for my children too. Life is fleeting so focusing on the most important things is necessary.
Wish I knew such a concept in my 20s. I was so overwhelmed and exhausted. I still have the stuff, but a lot less of it. I don't need much to cook at home, or to sew for that matter. But my kids are 16 and 18, I am not working 40 hours a week, and I've gotten rid of a ton of other stuff.
Another great video, thank you. I too am amazed at how much I packed into my life when I was younger. Pretty much the same things as you actually, with the addition of homeschooling; though strangely it did make the on-call of midwifery and doulaing(“) easier for me. I feel as if I did a great job at everything ……. EXCEPT taking care of myself. And that was a big error in judgment. Now as the clock races faster each day minimizing has been making it possible to enjoy my pared down lifestyle and I am so grateful.
I'm from Canada and the hardest thing for me to accept is not being able to do what I used to do when I was younger when I was. Fifteen years old I had a woodstove and a garden and did sewing and canning and baking and baking and making bread 4ourfamilyeverysingleweek. I'm a senior now and my brain still thinks like i'm fifteen sixteen years old. There's nothing I can't do when it comes to preparing foods cutting. The wood using the old Ringer washer hanging up the clothes. I mean it's very difficult to get rid of the canning jars because it's Me myself and I l o l. I'm in a smaller home and I mean like a bachelor is actually sweet. And I remember Kenny canning food every single day. I remember the Apple orchard I remember the property my dad used to have it anymore. I mean I don't have it anymore never did get it because of a Dishonest lawyer that took all my. Property before I knew what I could count to. Every time my dad built a home there was always electric stove in it and a woodstove and we always had a huge garden and some of the property. Was. Twenty acres and the last one I lived in had two acres. And so now I'm downsizing I'm not making those pies anymore. I'm not making those homemade bread anymore. I'm not using a ringer wash or anymore and I never got my finger stuck in the ringer l o l So that fantasy part of me is still there because it existed. It wasn't something I looked back and say I could have done. But it was the true fact that I was doing everything when I was 15. Even? Sewing. My own clothes and my mother she made my hair into a wig. She soded by hand and it took two years to do it. I say if you're going to do something do it while you are young. Because when you get older your health deteriorates and you can't do everything that you used to do so you have to be realistic.
My fantasy self is to be a mother, at 40 after ten losses and 4 rounds of IVF that dream is slipping away. I have no idea how I will declutter all the baby clothes, maternity clothes, cot and things. I will probably need a therapist to help with that overwhelmingly heavy grieving process. I will never be anyone’s mother.😢
No matter how hard it gets I never ever regret or wish I had less kids I actually wish I had more lol. I have 5 so far. Atleast you try, I have my mom's only grandkids and she hasn't called them ever she never writes them or buys them presents not even a card. .
Kayla, I am so sorry that your mom doesn't have the desire or capacity to be the loving mother and grandmother that you wish and desire her to be. While I don't know you or your mother, I would like to suggest you watch TH-cam videos by Dr Les Carter. Listen and see if any of what he says resonates with you. He has helped me heal from my experiences with my mom. Maybe he can help you. I wish you well. 🙏 💙 🥰
I listen to this video in the car on the way to work and I don’t think I heard you say that you make time for your husband, just the kids and grand kids and your parents 😔
I think one of the sweetest things you said in this video was wanting to be able to look back with your husband in your 80s and say, "Look at all we shared." ❤️
You know what really gets me about letting go of my fantasy selves: the money I spent on those things. I feel SO GUILTY about the fact that I spent $100s, maybe even into the $1000s on my fantasy self items (and there is a lot... I made a list). That guilt keeps me in this constant state of anxiety from all the things I have piled on myself
I have been watching your videos for a long time. I loved the fantasy self one. I look back at my past and realize I actually did so many things. I went to college, was on a daily tv show, raised three daughters and one grandson. I was a single working mom for 50 years. I homesteaded for a while, although that word was not used then. I took care of my parents and adult children, I am still their sounding board. I took dancing lessons and learned to swim at the Y. I sewed and made all our clothes and later made charity quilts and other crafts to sell. I am an artist and sing in the choir. I look back at all the things I have done, although I did not do them at the same time. I feel grateful for all these experiences, at 75, I’m still very active, I’m still an artist, have lunches with my circle of friends. I am on a continuous minimalism journey, simplifying my life and enjoying every moment. I was a widow young, so most things I did alone. My life at times seemed like a roller coaster, but I always took a little time to take care of myself. I think that is key. It is also key to setting an example for my children.
Only recently as I retire (😂) have I discovered this little nugget - I can have anything, but I can’t have everything. I can do anything, but I can’t do everything. I can be anything, but I can’t be everything. And knowing what I know now, I would not want it all anyway.
I don’t have time to quilt but I can sew buttons. I don’t have time to be an urban homesteader but I can fill a couple grow pots and try zucchini and tomatoes on the back deck. I’m no master baker but I like to ‘pantry bake’ (I have enough stuff to make ginger molasses cookies year round) once in a while.
This is a good reminder of how much I really have while having soooo much less stuff.
I'm one of the people who was so affected by your fantastic self video. My fantasy self included entertaining friends so I have collected & stored all the kitchen paraphernalia that goes with hosting dinner get-togethers. I now realize that I no longer have the time/energy/desire to entertain more than a couple of dinner guests at a time. So, I have decided to invite single friends & couple friends for dinner & to let go of all the entertaining paraphernalia that I now find so encumbering. I have also decided to get rid other things I'm not using like my cross-stitch supplies, my fine China set, most of my gardening pots, & all the other items being stored but not being used. Last week I gave away a huge bag of fabric scraps. I find it freeing. Thank you!
I don’t know if you read from notes as you talk to us but if you do you certainly cover it up well. It appears that you just have a talent of talking “off the cuff “ but making it flow as if this conversation just comes from you naturally. So many use extra words ,like uhh and right? and ya know? You are pleasant to the ears. I look forward to your posts. Donna
Thank you so much Donna! I appreciate that. I've been working hard to not use filler words, but I know I still use "and so" too often. My first videos are painful to watch. 😂
@@Nourishingminimalism I wouldn’t worry about it. ♥️
These videos about the fantasy self have helped me so very much. Thank you for giving everyone permission to let go of things. Not just physical things but things that are taking up space in our heads.
Can relate to this so much. It's so important to be content and confident in the place God has placed us. Dreams may not change but the way to reach them may. Ultimately the most important thing is to follow His will in our lives.
Thank you so much for making me fully realise that I have a wonderful full life. I have now known a few years without anxiety - Such a relief! I had been juggling too many balls for far too long. I will be 65 (female) in August and at last know what is important and what is not 🙏👊
I used to put so much pressure on myself to be the "perfect" parent, spouse, etc...and was so busy doing the items on the list (I created in my head) to check off. After decluttering so many things from my house, I slowly realized I had to also declutter my fantsy-self's calendar, social media, obligations, expectations, and toxic relationships. I love your channel. It has given me the confidence to know and remember that what I did in my life was a good thing.
That's wonderful Thelma! ❤️
That is one of the best concepts that helps me let go of the toughest de cluttering projects for me. Hobbies, clothes, cookbooks and supplies - thank you!
O… M… GOODNESS. 😵💫🥺😭😭😭
I am certainly one who GREATLY appreciates and favors that most popular ‘Fantasy Self’ video… but the impact I felt from watching that now pales in comparison to what I am feeling at this moment.
I can’t thank ‘Tova’ and ‘Jen B’ enough for putting my angst into painfully honest, thought-provoking words.
Angst I couldn’t define.
Couldn’t admit to.
*Wouldn’t* admit to.
I honestly haven’t felt that “Today is the first day of the rest of your life” feeling in quite some time, but it’s in me… all warm and tingly…
It’s NOW.
I’m forever grateful to our Lord for you… for your willingness to be relatably transparent… for your phenomenally beneficial heart talks… for just the sweet, oddball sister in Christ that you are.
✊♥️
❤️❤️❤️
Rachel... Thank you so much for being so honest about how nurturing the relationship with your children doesn't come naturally to you. 🙏🏻 This is my experience as well, and sometimes I feel really guilty about it. I have to be very mindful and intentional about it. (Think of questions to ask them and set aside actual time to be present.) I love my kids more than anything in the world, as I know you do as well, but the relationships are something I have to really consciously work at. Thank you for this video. I think that this has impacted me more than any of your others, and that is saying something! (Because I love and appreciate all of your content.) Sincerely, thank you! 🙏🏻❤️
❤️❤️❤️
Omg, my recipe 😊books. I just loaded a box of recipe books I never made any thing with.
Thank you for these videos it makes it easier to share them with my 12 year old daughter who has trouble letting go of her fantasy self in art. She is very artistic and wants to try everything. She is narrowing down with the question "If I have 30 minutes what do I want to do?" Realistically this is our life with 3 under 3 years old. Little pockets of time that we can use to feel joy and fulfillment in the every day.
I used to read the Proverbs 31 woman and just sigh knowing it was too high of a bar. But I heard someone say what you said, she doesn't do it all at one time, but in and out of seasons of life. Good word.
Such a great topic. Thank you for posting this video 🌟
“Taking a look at ourselves, what we want out of our lives and then releasing all the things that don’t help us do that, that don’t help us live that way or accomplish the things that we want to. Look at all the stuff you have in your home that support all these different ‘variations’ of you. Is that stuff helping you with your ultimate priorities?” Focus on the things you really want to do right now.
So, I also understand that every time you/I saw that stuff just sitting there it was shouting at you/me and probably made you/me feel bad about yourself/myself - no one needs that pressure. Glad you were able to let-stuff-go.
As I age I struggle with my “previous” self. I loved living in the country, raising horses and my children, but made the decision to leave the “place I loved” (marriage I didn’t) for the safety of myself and my young children and moved to the city. I always thought/hoped I would be able to return to that kind of life when the children were grown, but had to accept the fact that that kind of life would be too difficult for me now. A few years ago I sold my English saddle and boy was that a struggle as it brought up memories (not all bad) but I had to feel the pain, accept the disappointment and continue to become content with my life.
I realize daily that I have so much to be thankful for.❤
Keeping relationships with people does take time. I’m trying to do better with this, but it’s so hard for me. I’m naturally an introvert and really enjoy spending time alone and “hobbying.”
Nah, I can tell that you prioritized the most important things
That's wonderful Katie! Isn't it interesting that when we let go of the excess that we collected to define us, that we can feel more authentic? I love it. ❤️
Thank you for your story.
WOW.♥️🤯
Excellent video!
I got rid of the organized fantasy homeschool mom. I was addicted to “planners” planning out the whole school year of all the things we were going to do, and all things we would be doing all the things! It doesn’t work that way! Life happens, and it took me 14 years of homeschooling to finally realize that I can’t keep up to those expectations!
I got rid of 10 planners yesterday. Now we just do the things and I write down the things we did. It’s ok if we didn’t finish the lapbook, or get to math. We just loop to do those the first thing the next day. Huge weight lifted off my shoulders!
This is what I have learned from your Fantasy videos. Thank you!
♥️
Wow, that's wonderful Rhonda. Thank you for sharing, I know other homeschool moms need to hear this too. ❤️
Thank you for this. Second year homeschooling and it is so hard to NOT check off the boxes.
Haha - I got so caught up in your family card game that I missed what you were saying and had to go back!😂Thanks for these great fantasy self videos!
Wao! I couldn't have express it better! Thanks for sharing this heartfelt video with us! I needed to hear this!
Beautiful, this is what I needed to learn and apply in my life.
Thankyou Miss
"Organically" and "authentically" and "contently" are key descriptors in living a wonderful life!❤
Aha, good one !! from watching this video the light went on for me ... and now will give away a piece of "fantasy self" ... and not grieve it :) thank you, again 💖
Rachael, you are so insightful. You put into words what I struggle to.
Such a great video today.
Yes! I needed to be reminded of this. I have slowly let go of things that I held onto for the “future me”. The “future me” appreciates realistic expectations :) They still try to creep in though so I have to be mindful of it.
They do try to creep in! I love how you said that - the "future me" appreciates realistic expectations. YES! ❤️
Thank you for being honest and open. This video has really resonated, even more than the previous fantasy self video. Not sure if it's timing or what. Thinking of my life as seasons has completed changed my thinking. I can release the guilt of not being able everything all the time. I am reevaluating what I really want for "the right now me". So thank you so much!!!!
Thank you for revealing reality to us all. Sometimes its hard for some us of to realize it. I feel like you speak for me.
YES - I needed this refreshing reminder. I went back and watched the Fantasy Self Video to get reinforced, recharged. I've been putting off cleaning out my 2nd bedroom/catchall room for a while. It's time to deal with it and the motivation from these videos will certainly help.
I think a reminder to watch the Fantasy Self videos would be welcomed by many of us, certainly me. Thank You...
These videos are really making me think and do a lot of soul searching. Thank you for these videos and fantasy selves.
Your background is so beautiful! Classy!
Thank you for doing this video. It has provoked some deep thought into my life and what is holding me back! You are a blessing to me! Oh, and I really like your hair this length! Very cute!
I’m so glad it was helpful Nance. And thank you- I decided to grow it out, so it’s going to be changing quite a bit over the next year. 😊
Rachel - you are speaking directly to my heart. I constantly need to remind myself what it is I truly want, but it does get easier to just let the non-important stuff go. You are right - time is so fleeting and when you start to recognize this it puts everything into perspective pretty quickly!
I have a friend she's a senior, but when she was raising her kids, it was amazing how she handled her life.
I couldn't follow the schedule she had. But she told me that she lived by her calendar. Sunday to sunday, she always had some day that she stayed with for a certain task, and she never deviated from that.
For was Her house cleaning day on Tuesday was her laundry day. Wednesday was her baking day, where she made bread , cakes and cookies, and everything that needed for a week. Etc
Friday was their shopping day. Saturday was their entertainment day , and they went out and did something as a family, and Sunday was the day that they would have friends over. If they wanted or just chill out and so there was a very strick's schedule and her house was immaculate..
But your mother was like that, so that is where it began.
For example, she got up at 6 AM, did her own thing, had a coffee, and by 7 she started breakfast at 7:30. The kids got up and made their beds brush their teeth. Wash their teeth wash up and got dressed and came to the breakfast table.
They had their morning discussion, and the kids walked to school because they were so close and mom cleaned . And that was on a regular basis Monday to Friday. And I asked. Her? How when the world do you do it? Your house is spotless and she says my husband helps out by picking up his mess, and every1 of us is responsible .
If they got the newspaper, she would read it her husband would come home and read it, and then it would go right to recycle immediately.
She also worked with her husband in the evening as a janitor, and the kids helped out by emptying the garbage, taking go garbage out, and doing. Some dusted when they were old enough.
They had a garden and she would do the canning and she would do repairs on the clothing for sewing.
And she knew exactly what time the kids would be home and what they should be expected when they got home, et cetera, so it was a family that I really did. Highly died because she was kind to her husband they were a great family. They got along, and now, even to this day, the kids are the same way.
But it's all to do with sticking with a schedule and getting up at the same time every day. And I said to her, "What if some unforeseen events happen?" She says you have to be prepared for some of that sometime. And another thing every monday evening, they would have a family get-together from six thirty to 8thirty,
I got a little card with a quote and though I normally pass those things on, this one I kept. It says, "You can do anything, but not everything." I needed that and this. Thank you!
As a mother we wear so many (hats) that we can loose sight of wants important in your life. We’re so busy with doing it all ,that we forgot to just let go of the extra things not important right then. Your videos remind me how I tried to do it all and there’s not enough time .Hind sight is 20-20 being a senior I look back at how hard it was with all the clutter.Thank you
I needed to hear this today. Have been struggling and feeling pulled between reality and fantasy. A great reminder of why I am decluttering. Thank you xx
Rachel, you share your story with such honesty and clarity, which has been very helpful to me. Thank you for this one especially. I so enjoy your videos and am grateful you continue to make them.
Love this topic! I so needed to hear it. I do get a bit stuck in the process of letting go and thinking I should sell off some of these unused things. It compounds the feelings of guilt over the money spent on fantasy hobbies that I never did.
One of your best videos yet (although I love them all)! The need to live intentionally is so underrated and not nearly discussed enough. When you're at the end of your life, it's too late for regrets. Amen! Thank you!
Thank you for this video, was feeling discouraged today, you brought relief 😊
Wow, this is straight from the Lord. Thank you!!!
I had to chuckle when you said keeping relationships with so many is hard.....it is!! So far I have five in-loves plus 20 grandchildren plus the original seven kids. It IS hard!! But, oh, so important!
Thank you so much for sharing all of this from your life, being so personal, and explaining it so well! I have been learning this same lesson on my minimalist journey. What is truly important in my life, what gives it meaning, and relationships are at the top of the list. It makes it much easier to clear out the fantasy stuff once you can define what is truly important. Being able to TRULY love my family, even when it's hard, has brought me far more peace and satisfaction then any of my fantasy selves could. Love all of your messages, thanks again for sharing this one! ❤🤗
Wise words! As a fairly new (almost) empty nester (one child at home) and grandmother (my daughter has had 3 children in the the last 5 years) I totally identify with what you said about time to spend time with family. The desire to 'be present' and also the fact that when you have to arrange to meet up or they have to check you'll be in when they are free to visit. Its much more complicated and takes more time than when you are all at home permanently. Precious times though.🥰
I dont know if I can declutter my fantasy self-she is the only friend I have. ❤
Thank you Rachel , you are a wonderful person. Im a momma 8 kids and homeschool them ,I can relate that it is so time consuming but the most important thing to nourish relationships with my children. I recently had to give up some ministries I was involved in because I wasn't being as available to my kids As I wanted to be. Cooking healthy meals is also something I enjoy for me and is important for my children too. Life is fleeting so focusing on the most important things is necessary.
Thank you for your honesty and your perspective!
I have just discovered your channel and am enjoying it so, so much. It truly is nourishing my soul. I am here! On this journey.
Wonderful! Thank you! ❤️
Thank You again for this reminder!
Thank you! I really needed to hear this right now!
Loved this video.
Wish I knew such a concept in my 20s. I was so overwhelmed and exhausted. I still have the stuff, but a lot less of it. I don't need much to cook at home, or to sew for that matter. But my kids are 16 and 18, I am not working 40 hours a week, and I've gotten rid of a ton of other stuff.
Another great video, thank you.
I too am amazed at how much I packed into my life when I was younger. Pretty much the same things as you actually, with the addition of homeschooling; though strangely it did make the on-call of midwifery and doulaing(“) easier for me. I feel as if I did a great job at everything ……. EXCEPT taking care of myself. And that was a big error in judgment.
Now as the clock races faster each day minimizing has been making it possible to enjoy my pared down lifestyle and I am so grateful.
Love this Rachel! The best fantasy self explanation I've seen Love Jo in Australia!! xxx
I'm from Canada and the hardest thing for me to accept is not being able to do what I used to do when I was younger when I was. Fifteen years old I had a woodstove and a garden and did sewing and canning and baking and baking and making bread 4ourfamilyeverysingleweek.
I'm a senior now and my brain still thinks like i'm fifteen sixteen years old.
There's nothing I can't do when it comes to preparing foods cutting. The wood using the old Ringer washer hanging up the clothes. I mean it's very difficult to get rid of the canning jars because it's Me myself and I l o l.
I'm in a smaller home and I mean like a bachelor is actually sweet.
And I remember Kenny canning food every single day. I remember the Apple orchard I remember the property my dad used to have it anymore. I mean I don't have it anymore never did get it because of a Dishonest lawyer that took all my. Property before I knew what I could count to.
Every time my dad built a home there was always electric stove in it and a woodstove and we always had a huge garden and some of the property. Was. Twenty acres and the last one I lived in had two acres.
And so now I'm downsizing I'm not making those pies anymore. I'm not making those homemade bread anymore. I'm not using a ringer wash or anymore and I never got my finger stuck in the ringer l o l
So that fantasy part of me is still there because it existed. It wasn't something I looked back and say I could have done. But it was the true fact that I was doing everything when I was 15. Even? Sewing. My own clothes and my mother she made my hair into a wig. She soded by hand and it took two years to do it.
I say if you're going to do something do it while you are young. Because when you get older your health deteriorates and you can't do everything that you used to do so you have to be realistic.
Realy lovely super advice!
I am so happy to have found your channel. I live in Montana also !
Yay! Welcome neighbor! 😊
So insightful. Have you done videos on "greiving" the fantasy selves?
Love this followup to your first video!
Who am I REALLY? That is such a difficult question sometimes.
Wonderful video and all so true.
Brilliant. 🌻
thank you for making me feel normal 😌
Profound! Thank you!
Thanks for this great message
My fantasy self is to be a mother, at 40 after ten losses and 4 rounds of IVF that dream is slipping away. I have no idea how I will declutter all the baby clothes, maternity clothes, cot and things. I will probably need a therapist to help with that overwhelmingly heavy grieving process. I will never be anyone’s mother.😢
Tara, I am so sorry for your losses, I can't imagine. 😞
I'm curious what game your family is playing in this video? It looks very face paced and fun!
good video ✅
First time watching one of your videos... I love your engery and message. Can you tell me about the tatto on your forearm?
No matter how hard it gets I never ever regret or wish I had less kids I actually wish I had more lol. I have 5 so far. Atleast you try, I have my mom's only grandkids and she hasn't called them ever she never writes them or buys them presents not even a card. .
Kayla, I am so sorry that your mom doesn't have the desire or capacity to be the loving mother and grandmother that you wish and desire her to be.
While I don't know you or your mother, I would like to suggest you watch TH-cam videos by Dr Les Carter.
Listen and see if any of what he says resonates with you. He has helped me heal from my experiences with my mom. Maybe he can help you. I wish you well. 🙏 💙 🥰
Don’t say the rethinking how many kids thing haha. I have 10. It’s a big challenge.
😂 when I started I was just going to go until I couldn’t have anymore. Can you imagine keeping up with 15-20? Whew!
I listen to this video in the car on the way to work and I don’t think I heard you say that you make time for your husband, just the kids and grand kids and your parents 😔
Well I didn’t intend to leave him out. We definitely take time to spend together
I think one of the sweetest things you said in this video was wanting to be able to look back with your husband in your 80s and say, "Look at all we shared." ❤️