❣Hi, Rachel, I just found you in time… being multi interested and enthusiastic, it’s been hard to put myself together during my working times as a jurist, but after retiring everything went overboard. The feeling ‘I could do everything …' was (is…) easily to see in my sourrounding. My fantasy is bigger than my capabilities… and the fantasy day has 48 hours or more. My main hobbies are reading, knitting/crocheting, cooking. In the second row drawing/painting, gardening, handcraft with paper. We have a tiny garden with herbs and veggies, fruit, flowers… and I now I let the work for my husband: less quarrels, what we plant where and when, less sweat for me, because I’m not as strong as my husband, more time for other things. Thank you for sharing, it was a good laugh: my fantasy self has grown too much… I’ll watch other videos of you: so far I was convinced that a multi interested person like me can’t be on the minimalism road, but I’m not so sure anymore after watching a handful of your videos. Thank you for sharing, love from Germany, Monika❣
I always wanted a hobby farm, but by the time my husband retired from the military, I realized we needed to stay in this town until the kids graduated. Now I am pushing 60 and can no longer do the physical work required for a farm. I have also let go of crocheting and other crafts due to arthritis. I'm sad because I never got to live out my dreams of homesteading. However I have gotten to travel the US and have met many wonderful people.
Maybe you can do some holidays, even working holidays, on organic farms! There are programs organizing that, I think “woofing” Is possible nearly everywhere, and it’s not only for young people. That could be very rewarding and satisfying and interesting and quite possible :-)!
The harder it gets to declutter, the more it is attached to fantasy life - but the secret surprise, is the amazing feeling you have in the days that follow. I have never, ever regretted a single fantasy item I’ve given away - and I’ve had some expensive fantasies! When you are compelled to learn the lesson about valuing the life you prioritize, you’ll stop wasting time, money and space on holding on to your fantasies. Try it, with something smaller and easier, you will feel so much better!
Decluttered tones of yarn and fabric this week… The stuff I have left I’m excited to use because I actually have a doable plan to use it. I’m now free to do it because I don’t have to finish the other projects first out of a weird sense of duty. Thank you for teaching us this freedom.
Same here about decluttering both yarn and fabric. I kept only the cotton yarn and got rid of a trash bag full of acrylic yarn to donate. As for the fabric I am doing the USE IT OR LOSE IT... I am prepping the fabric and cutting it during the week so the weekend when Dad is home I can have a few hours of interrupted sewing... So freeing.
Watched this video this morning and then reflected on it for several hours. Opened up a drawer in my desk to see lots and lots of art supplies that are never going to be used. I boxed up the ones that someone else can use and tossed the rest. What a wonderful feeling of lightness! Thanks so much for sharing about the fantasy self and decluttering. It's a practical help for so many people to realize they don't need to beat themselves up for "failing" to do 20 different hobbies!! 🙂
My constant striving for the fantasy self I thought I should have been was making me ill, exhausted, and depressed. I used simple decluttering and then minimalism to reinvent myself, and I am so happy now. I feel energized and content. Thank you so much for your encouragement and the wise words you share.
Oh wow, this hit me hard. I too have lots of Fantasy Hobbies. You pretty much hit them all. I did donate a bunch of yarn last fall. I also 'gave up' my stamping hobby when I got married, as I really didn't have time, and gave all of my supplies to my friend who I knew would appreciate them. I have AD/HD - Inattentive Type and I really have to remind myself as well of what is important in my life and what it will take for me to get there. I also have to remind myself from time to time "Will what I'm doing, help me get where I want to be". I did not feel like 'Adulting' or doing "Today" and you kind of put it back into my face. Good timing. Thanks for your videos. I too am a 'messy'. I too am a 'slob'. I too have too many hobbies. I do need to work on simplifying my life and be who I need to be to my husband and my son.
Well, You did it! You actually led me to evaluate my exercise equipment. I am a "wanna be" Fitness Fanatic. I want to be the most fit 65 year old. I have collected simple equipment - dumbbells, bands, kettle bells, mats, etc. to exercise at home on days that I don't go to the Gym. And I have actually done that exactly ZERO times! They are out the door to the car now and to the thrift store Monday Morning!
I am working now on '"What do I want to do that I don't get to do?" Making new plans. Trying to sort who I want to be and want to do vs. "My Fantasy- Self"
Having so many hobbies, makes me feel like a failure as I cannot devote time to them all. So, I crochet baby blankets for women who choose life, working on low carb lifestyle recipes. I only have time for two along with family, friends and church. But I think I found a good balance of doing for others and self. Thanks for the reality check reminder!
I have lived for the fantasy self for so many years. I was a working single mother, with the fantasy of homesteading, I actually did it for several years, I have a degree in Home Economics and desire to be an artist, I raised my children, teaching them the things that interested me, they even learned the periodic table along with their spelling words. Times changed, life was lived, I am 75 now and recognize that seasons of life change. I really don’t feel gardening, let alone farming, is what I could still do. I’ve recently given up quilting, which took up too much space and time, I’ve limited the number of volunteer things I do. The things I enjoy are daily Zen Doodles (ink drawing) and water color. TH-cam tutorials are my entertainment. You are right fantasy vs season of life reality is different. My joy comes from living in a somewhat minimalist manner, stop shopping and bringing things home. Simplicity is calming, living with mindfulness is the best for me.
I don’t know who described me to you but they really know me well and now you do too! I’ve only just found you tonight and listened to this at bedtime. Im going to ponder on this for about an hour and write down the life I truly want. The hobbies and supplies that I will actually use. I tend to monetize a hobbie/idea and buy supplies to make to sell. The planning and shopping for materials is so fun and exciting and once all I need to do is to DO IT, I don’t. I get “busy”, distracted, or just tied up in other “very important” endeavors. Thanks for the kick in the butt that I really needed.
I love this Rachel! It’s always so interesting to hear about other people’s fantasy selves…I gave up a lot of crafting stuff too. I would buy stuff for like sewing and quilling and felting but never get around to it! Sold it all. 💪
For me - I’ve been a case manager for yrs and enjoyed it very much - going to peoples homes and talking and helping them but also cons to job all the traveling - trying to find a clean bathroom ( esp when restaurants closed during CoVID) so I was getting a little venting and someone in office every other day says - when you going to grad school - When You Going To Grad School? I thought ok maybe that’s where I’m suppose to be. Long story short - that’s a fantasy self and once I left grad school ( no didn’t get a degree but finished one class/ 1/2 semester on line) and reached more contentment God opened a door and a case manager job open - long story short but in 2 weeks I start that job with the highest pay I’ve ever had due to all my case management experience. In short fantasy gives debt ( dissatisfaction/ disappointment) but reality plus passion leads to inner happiness and personal wealth.
I very much agree! Fantasies leaves us with debt, dissatisfaction and disappointment. That’s wonderful you found what you enjoy and that pays what you want as well! ❤️
This was great! I let go of cross stitch embroidery and donated all my supplies to a nurse that I knew loved to cross stitch with her daughter. Also I let go of a lot of exercise equipment when I became true to myself and realized I only like yoga and more gentle exercises. I let go of all my black clothing and shoes because those are not true to me. I’m still learning how to let go of perfectionism and repeat to myself daily that Practice makes progress.
Well said! I was a fantasy gardener, made several large beds, years later a new job and health issues meant weeds took over. Now, at 66, I’m turning beds into grass and being choosy about what I keep. Ridding my yard of thistle is this summer’s priority.
I have far too many art supplies - Pastels, water colour paints, acrylic paints, calligraphy pens/ inks the list goes on….. Th e reality is that I will never find enough time to,become proficient at all these mediums. Also - I spend a lot of time organising all my art supplies 🤯 I need to get real!
THANK YOU, Rachel! I could write a novel addressing all the amazing content of your three "Fantasy Self" videos, so I'm keeping my comment simple: THANK YOU! You put-into-words a crucial insight that has been fermenting at the back of my head for some time. We hear certain words and phrases all the time and on the surface we understand their meaning - wonder why we can't just "simply" do it - you have illustrated how "simple" and "not-so-simple" coexist (love that term in the decluttering context) and why we both "can" and "cannot" do everything we set our minds to. Again, THANK YOU! Physics professors out there will recognize the principles at play here. Even we non-science types understand physics... ;-) we just use more down-to-earth language to talk about it.
Homeschooling and cooking are my priorities right now. I've had to give up hobbies due to the way I approach things. I'm an all of nothing type person. When I was deep into knitting and quilting, it's all I wanted to do. I felt annoyed by my kids' demands. I knew I just had to put it away for awhile. What is the point of making a sweater for a kid when the process involves me distracting them with Tv or whatever. I know this isn't the case for a lot of moms; I wish I could be more balanced, but I have to be honest with myself.
I really appreciate these videos. I do have a hard time letting go of hobby stuff, though I am taking steps by just *not buying more* because I already have enough sock yarn, enough dress material, way more than enough embroidery floss. I’m trying to make better use of it too by teaching my daughter who is also inclined to craftiness to knit so the yarn will get used faster. I too have many fantasy selves that I must learn to set free.
I just decluttered all of my homeschooling supplies I was saving to make hands on activities. I fantasized about making them but never did. I was trying to fit an image I saw on TH-cam. I let it go and it feels great! I guilted myself into keeping this stuff for years thinking my kids will be so smart. But I was so overwhelmed by the amount of things I had and all the ideas that I did nothing with it!! Talk about guilt!! Accepted who I am and let go of my fantasy self
I’ve decluttered tons of kitchen tools and entertaining dishes! My fantasy self liked to set fancy tables and make fancy food for my guests. My actual self came to realize that I barely have guests over for dinner and I don’t even like to cook very much! 😂 Now when I have my kids or friends over for dinner, I keep the dishes and food simple and focus on enjoying the company. Thank you Rachel for making it feel ok. Someone is enjoying lovely things from the thrift store! 😊
I closed my clinic about a few years ago to be able to take care of my kids full time, I enjoy being at home, being here in the morning when they head off to school, be here when they get back home, make them dinner ect ect.. I worked with the public for 28 years and it became overwelming at one point, it gave me lots of anxiety and I already suffer from anxiety since I was a child due to very strict and sometimes violent parents. So I enjoy spending time with the kids and doing things with them, encouraging them and treating them kindly, something that my parents lacked doing with me so it's very healing. Even though I am very good at working with the public, even though I do still get job offers, for now I prefer to be home. I still worked part time as a massage therapist from home, but since the pandemic hit, I stopped. And I am enjoying peaceful time when I can. I will perhaps start again when I feel ready or choose another type business to work from home, still trying to figure that out. I found my calling though in doing activism for animal rights and the environment. After I saw how much animals suffer on farms, slaughterhouses and other exploitative industries, I switched to plant-based, my lifestyle, and been doing activism. It is gratifying and gives me a sense of puporse. Thank you for your videos, I have watched them a few times, it motivates me to clean and declutter and I've also learned to let go of the fantasy self. I really want to reach the minimalist home. It's still a working process, I do little bits almost daily. Some days, I don't know where to start, so I just choose a small area at a time. Congrats on your front yard cleanup, I'm trying to motivate myself to start tackling my yard tomorrow, lol. thanks again
Well that was a really great one and that really made so much sense to me like I have sewing machines and I do not sit down so I took a yarn out of my house last year I had yarn out the yin yang and I cannot crochet a dishcloth. And I have sketchbooks and I have cookbooks and I have all of these things and I don't do any of them and until I watch this today I didn't realize that those are my fantasy hobbies and they're not achievable. I have enough trouble just keeping up with my yard! Different really really helpful and thank you so much and I really appreciate it
I have decluttered craft supplies to a home school co-op, friends and relatives. The three hobbies I chose to continue are sewing, painting and jewelry making. All the other stuff was just getting in my way and blurring my focus and want to create. Thanks for another Great video!
Yessssss!!!!! This video got a standing ovation from me!!! A few years ago we thought we wanted an urban homestead as well. We put in hours of hard work making an amazing garden, setting up systems and even got chickens for eggs and animals for meat. We had to buy all kinds of special equipment for this as well. Fast forward a few years later and we are sooooo done with the whole urban homestead thing. Lol We realized that we wanted to spend our time going camping as family, going biking, hiking, swimming, etc. We did not want to be stuck at home tending animals and gardens all the time. So we sold the animals and let the garden go and I couldn't be happier to not have that all on my plate. 😬 We also abandoned our fantasy of moving out of town into several acres when we realized how much physical work it demanded taking care of property like that. My husband and I don't want to be stuck with having to take care of a farm in our 80's and 90's, which would be extremely hard on older bodies. Letting go of that fantasy has been very freeing!!
What a relief! I grew up around farms I remember all the work! I always have to remind myself- I don’t want to milk account tri today. That’s why I pay someone else to do it. 😆 ❤️
During lock down I decided to tackle all the projects/crafts that I had never had the time to do before. And it was quite satisfying to get so much out of the dark recesses where they had been waiting for my attention and DO them. But honestly, looking back, it was more graft/work than fun. I came to realize that many of my fantasies were totally mismatched to my actual inclinations and they actually sucked joy and energy from me. I wish I’d had the sense to just get rid of them even though I did in fact have the fortitude to complete them.
Good for you for doing them! IYS wonderful that you’ve come to realize what you enjoy/don’t enjoy. Yes, you put in a lot of work, but now you can have confidence in your decluttering decisions. ❤️
Rachel, you are definitely not lazy! You are so right about the fantasy self! We see that you prioritize by putting your children /family first! Very commendable!! Great example to all!! I love seeing you all working together! To some of us that is a fantasy! No, we can't do it all! You are definitely accomplishing a lot! The concept of nutritious cooking, attending to your children, inside/ outside home maintenance, that is a huge success! I admire you! I am sure a lot of others do to! Once again, your children are such nice children! Your neighbours are lucky to have you live near them! Thanks for the video!
You addressed the issue that others had about why you don't just do those fantasy self things with grace. Good job! You made a good point. There are only so many hours in the day and you really have to prioritize.
Ma'am! YES! The heaviness of expectation I put on myself vs. evaluating realistic capabilities for where I am right now. This video was so good and so needed for me today. Thank you so much!
Today I decluttered a Chinese calligraphy set that someone gifted me and I have never used. I like doing fancy writing, but I can't be bothered to learn how to use the special ink and brushes! I have some nice pens that I use for the writing, and that's enough.
Actually doing 2 things is more meaningful to me than hoping to do 15. When I don’t manage the planned and hoped for activities I disappoint myself. Like the skinny jeans in the closet it brings me down. I’d rather enjoy my accomplishments than feel I’ve let myself down . Right on Rachel!
🦋appreciating how you brought us through this process of thinking through fantasy vs. realities & priorities (family first). You are an excellent teacher!
My hobbies is an issue. I have so many, but I only do each thing a little. I have really tried to evaluate what I should let go of, but I Can not bear the thought of letting any of it go.
Thank you Rachel! In order to enjoy my hobby, I must focus on one project at a time and complete it (like a quilt) or it is stressful rather than fun. You are always encouraging us to be kind to ourselves and others 🌱🍞💕
I love this fantasy self concept, I think it might be the one that got me to subscribe. It’s helped me declutter even more since- clothes, books, kitchen things, tools etc.
So so true about expectations! This is still in process for me, sorting these expectations out. One example is my Yiddish books. I’m a language person and studied Yiddish for a year in the 90s and loved it. I have a good dictionary and some probably kind of rare language literary journals etc. that I intended to read and work through and what not. But it’s been well over 20 years and I’ve hardly used any of them, but they’ve moved with me a zillion times. I think I’m ready to release them at this point, I think maybe. Especially if I find someone who would really value and appreciate and use them.
Oh Rachel, I loooove Farm City! - - This video is some great food for thought, thank you!! I have learned EVERYTHING is time, even something as simple as a trampoline for our kids. It takes time to set it up, time to maintain, time to repair, or time to take down and dispose of at some point. I was willing to spend the time for a trampoline but I'm not willing to spend the time for say an above ground pool. We do have chickens and ducks and a small garden and this is where I feel comfortable. I know that right now we can't and I don't want to spend more time effort on more animals, and that's perfectly okay.
Thank You Rachel. 💜😎💜 Once again you are "spot on" with your "deeper dive" of our fantasy selves. I once had a fantasy of sitting at my beautiful desk and earning a living by writing children's books. Last summer I injured my back while lifting a large potted plant and sitting was so painful for several weeks that I realized that the real me doesn't enjoy sitting still for prolonged periods of time. I am more of a large muscle physical de-stresser. Thank You 💜 also for the 3 hobby guideline. Turning "fun" into work and starting too many "projects" has left me exhausted and discouraged in my past. Learning how to be kind to myself is an ongoing lesson.
Excellent video, Rachel! I watched it twice. I decided that my 3 hobbies will be cooking school, painting, and sewing. The rest is going to be packed up and donated. I do live on a homestead, with chickens, ducks, and goats. I have help doing chores with our birds and goats. I just can’t give up the homestead, garden, and canning the produce. You really made me take a hard look at fantasy self! I do appreciate you, Rachel! You always encourage me to be better, to do better, and I am that much closer to be a minimalist! ♥️🙃
Thank you ❤ I found your channel a couple of weeks ago and it helps me to calm down. I am on my decluttering journey for about 6 months. I can see the progress already, however some days I feel down. Your videos help me to realize what's going on in my head. Thank you for your time and effort that you put to prepare your content ❤
Every time I watch one of your videos, I am newly amazed at how you get to the very core of an issue. So much of our clutter is the paraphernalia that accompanies our hobbies and projects. Becoming realistic about our limitations is the key. Letting go of our fantasy self is a liberation. Thank you, Rachel. EDITED to add about perfectionism: There is nothing wrong with buying something ready-made every now and then. I used to make everything myself, from meals to soft furnishings. I wore myself out trying to be superwoman (or supergran!). I now know better. Giving yourself permission to take things easy occasionally isn't a failure.
Very good point! It’s important to gauge our energy for what we require of ourselves in day to day life. Eating/feeding our family is what’s important- not always that we made it ourselves. ❤️
Thanks for this video. At this point in time I am raising my kids, home educating them and renovating my home. I’ve been so frustrated because there are a bunch of other things I wish I was doing, but I just can’t make it happen right now without neglecting these ‘top of the list’ things. Time to let it go. Remembering that this a season and that hopefully when the renovating is done I’ll have more time again does help. Also, that I’ve chosen to make these things my priority. No one is twisting my arm… I can do more or less what I want.
I'm married, in my late 20's and I have a billion fantasy selves... But the biggest two of them are in totally opposition... One - a happy, 1950's style housewife with fancy dresses, who stays at home and enjoy cleaning, preparing delicious food every day for family, taking special care for needs of hers husband and children. On the other side there's a business lady, who goes to the office every day on heels with perfect manicure and elegant hairstyle. She is wearing suits, has an amazing career and earns a lot of money. She is travelling all around the globe and spends her weekend in a good SPA with her partner (no children included). I love them both and I cannot decide, which one I want to be.
I struggle with simplifying my hobbies too. What I have decided that has helped is that I only crochet in the colder months because it just feels to hot the rest of the year. And I’ve also decided to read at least 1 book a month instead of a week. These limits have actually helped me enjoy those hobbies more.
My fantasy self is the only thing that keeps me going. I got rid of a lot of stuff that belonged to my fantasy self, and I lost the will to keep trying. It was like, "What's the use?". I'm 67. I know that I'm never going to be the hostess with the mostest, or the chic city girl who marries the rich handsome guy in the tuxedo, swanning around our Grecian garden with marble statues, sipping champagne, but I still need the fantasy. I suppose it's childish, but fighting it only makes me give up on life. I stopped cleaning the house, taking care of myself, and I barely kept up with paying the bills. Sometimes I forgot to pay the bills for months. So I decided that I need my fantasy self, and I'm keeping her.
I hear you on those damn mosquitos. When we moved to Minnesota, I specifically asked the realtor about mosquitos. He bald-faced lied to me and told me not worry about them in the day time. Haha! He should have said in the day time only IF you are in the blazing sun, but don't be anywhere near the shade or a pond (of which Minnesota has at every street corner it seems). And then there are the ticks. 😒
@@Nourishingminimalism Yes, the bugs are annoying here, as is the humid summers. (I don't mind the winters though.) We drove through Montana once on our way to Spokane. We stopped at a Denny's or IHop in Bozeman. Can't remember which. It was back in 2003 (where has all the time gone?). Beautiful state you have there!
I think that this video gave many that Ahhh...haaa.....moment. Sometimes it takes someone showing a different perspective. Thank you for making me realize that I am normal.
Also, I can’t seem to think of any recent fantasy hobbies that I have let go of, but I can easily think of a few that I’d love my husband to make peace with letting go of! I might get him to watch this video… okay, here’s one that we both let go of (although I think we might still have a few large backpacks hidden behind the camping stuff that we haven’t parted with): the idea of back country camping. We are car-camping people. That’s that. Maybe we’ll do overnight canoe trips “someday” or maybe out kids will, but we never did ANY in 20 years together and we’re not getting any younger, so it’s not looking too likely!
I get the camping stuff… I wanted to do back country camping too! But my husband has ptsd from too many floods during Boy Scout camping trips, and I often rains at night in the mountains, so we always leave early. I finally admitted that we need to just rent forest service cabins so we don’t stress about the weather! ❤️
@@Nourishingminimalism yeah! It all feels the same once you’re out there! Thanks for the comment reply and the video! It’s hard not to get jealous or self-critical when I hear of friends who go overnight canoe camping with kids… it’s usually only for one or two nights, but still. I’ll try to not get hooked on these feelings next time and be more self-accepting!
BOOKS my fantasy self is going to read all these books and it will help change my life. I realized that I like stories( true stories, history stories and adventures) and got rid of all the self helps me to declutter and downsizing. My fantasy self is I am full time care giver and my passion in journaling, doodling, urban sketching which covers the 3 hobbies and letting the rest go today. Thanks and keep reminding us of letting go of a fantasy life that is not realistic or obtainable
Thank you for this video Rachel! I discovered you a few months ago and this is my favorite video of you. I love how pragmatic and honest you are, this concept of fantasy self is fantastic! It resonates a lot with me and I’m sure it will guide me in the future. For my part, I don’t have a lot of clutter, but I do have too many hobbies and in the end, end up doing none of them , disappointing myself. Looking at your life in an honest way and choosing two or three hobbies is a great idea! ☺️
Wow! So much great information, I’m going to be thinking of this today. I got so overwhelmed by my hobbies I stopped them all. Thanks to you today I now realise when it’s all or nothing it inevitably leads to burn out. Which is where I am now. I’ve been Gardening, doing diy, up cycling, crocheting, writing, journaling and making woodwork projects. I work and have grown up children and grandchildren nearby also ageing parents! I have fibromyalgia and arthritis, I knew something must change but I didn’t know where to start. I’m going to pick 3, maybe make them seasonal so I don’t need to drop anything just not do them all at once. Thank you, thank you 🙏 did I say ‘thank you?’ 😄🙏😂
I'm just on this journey now I've so many hobbies and find it hard to choose so I'm in the process of letting go of a few and concentrating on the ones I keep...i love your videos found them a couple of months ago after doing a lot of decluttering in different parts of my life ty xx
I gave up rug hooking and card making. It took me time to realize that while it was perfect for some of my friends, it just wasn't for me. Out went all the supplies and I haven't thought of them until your video!
Never thought of it that way. I've definitely lived in my fantasy life. Realistically, I'm OK with what is manageable every day. I have a small urban garden that I can manage. My fantasy self would love to be growing 3 times the amount of veg. Not realistic and I have to be OK with that. Thanks again for a great video. Looks like you made a lot of progress with the help of your family.
Also wanted to add that this video came at the perfect time because today I am tackling a major declutter project in our laundry/storage room. I have sooooooo much craft stuff it's insane. We homeschool so I have lots and lots of items to do Pinterest worthy learning activities with as well. What I have found is that we rarely do these activities. I am learning to give up the Instagram worthy homeschooling mom fantasy self and just be content with knowing I can be basic and that's totally ok. I don't have to be the mom who does all the amazing sensory bins and science experiments and post pictures on Instagram of our beautiful poetry tea time. Lol I can just be a regular mom that teaches her son at home and all the bells and whistles aren't required and it doesn't make me any less of a mom or a teacher. If I spend less time managing all the things that go with this fantasy self maybe we can actually have the time to enjoy some of the benefits of homeschooling. So I am glad I saw this video today since I am about to be faced with all kinds of fantasy self items in my declutter project today.
This was so good! Thank you Rachel! I like the idea of living in the countryside, but at the moment my life is in the city. But we have tried to go in the wilderness every week and have a fire in the forest. And I have my Garden, in my balcany 😂. I have also cottage, but it is so far away, that I can not farm there. But I can cut the trees there and enjoy nature. I started to paint and I want to walk in the forest. Those are my hobbys and my litle garden 😂
Hmmm… I know that I need to have actual hobbies and that that is part of self-care. I don’t know if they would count as hobbies to most people, but I’ll go with swimming (only in summer months these years / generally speaking), reading Liane Moriarty novels (I happily purchased the most recent one last week! Hard cover! Bought for myself! In a real store as opposed to online or as a gift from someone!) and… wait for it… doing dishes while listening to podcasts or watching your videos! 😂🌷✌🏼☀️
Have you seen "The Biggest Little Farm" on Netflix? You'd love it. The photography is stunning & you can't help fantasizing a different lifestyle through it. I always dreamed of being a cowgirl; riding horseback every day, driving cattle - doesn't mean it was ever going to happen.
When you said scrapbooking, I laughed because for the last 20 years I have been buying those supplies and have done very little of it but I still have the fantasy that one day all my photos will be in albums and keepsakes for my two Sons to have long after I’m gone….I guess I really haven’t been able to give up on this idea. I will let you know how it goes.
I scrapbooked for years and have over "33" 12x12 books that are over 3 inches thick. I also have numerous albums of various sizes. All on shelves and behind doors, no one looks at them. What will my children do with them when I'm gone? I think a box system would have been better - who knows?
Such a smart video ! When the fantasy meets the reality (one of my favorite sayings) changes everything. Off topic, but are those big cracks in your house foundation? I live in the desert, in the southwest, in a gated manufactured home community. Fortunately our homes are surrounded by pretty stones, so all I have to do is keep the weeds picked. Container gardening is what I prefer, so I can move them around as needed, and whatever I have planted doesn't go crazy. I have always had a fantasy of having a small home on my own land. I'm 63 and widowed, with 2 young adult children. Maybe one day I will make my little patch of heaven come true :) Thanks for sharing Rachel, I always enjoy your videos. 🥰💐🌷🌱🌞🌛🏜✝💗
thank you for these videos they are helpful and it brings helpful ideas it brings some kind of freedom to me im like yes she is right i dont need to go on some crusade lol
Do you park in your garage ? It looks like you blocked your driveway making. It hard to get into the driveway. Can you not collect rain water in a tank?
We don’t park in the garage. The pile is to go to the dump, just have to make a day to do that. And yes, we just set up rain barrels, not sure how much rain we’ll collect, it’s Montana, so dryer than other states.
@Emily U. Relate👏. I got so accustomed to seeing the same clothes, masquerading as a wearable wardrobe, and taking up closet space. Only when I really made myself try them on could I clearly see how many garments were a hard No. And, being completely honest with myself, how many were likely to never, ever fit me again. I felt very accepting and centred after that exercise, and was able donate much of the pile.
It’s astonishing how high our expectations of ourselves can be! There is so much wisdom for a peaceful life in this video.
❣Hi, Rachel, I just found you in time… being multi interested and enthusiastic, it’s been hard to put myself together during my working times as a jurist, but after retiring everything went overboard. The feeling ‘I could do everything …' was (is…) easily to see in my sourrounding. My fantasy is bigger than my capabilities… and the fantasy day has 48 hours or more. My main hobbies are reading, knitting/crocheting, cooking. In the second row drawing/painting, gardening, handcraft with paper. We have a tiny garden with herbs and veggies, fruit, flowers… and I now I let the work for my husband: less quarrels, what we plant where and when, less sweat for me, because I’m not as strong as my husband, more time for other things. Thank you for sharing, it was a good laugh: my fantasy self has grown too much… I’ll watch other videos of you: so far I was convinced that a multi interested person like me can’t be on the minimalism road, but I’m not so sure anymore after watching a handful of your videos. Thank you for sharing, love from Germany, Monika❣
I always wanted a hobby farm, but by the time my husband retired from the military, I realized we needed to stay in this town until the kids graduated. Now I am pushing 60 and can no longer do the physical work required for a farm. I have also let go of crocheting and other crafts due to arthritis. I'm sad because I never got to live out my dreams of homesteading. However I have gotten to travel the US and have met many wonderful people.
Maybe you can do some holidays, even working holidays, on organic farms! There are programs organizing that, I think “woofing” Is possible nearly everywhere, and it’s not only for young people. That could be very rewarding and satisfying and interesting and quite possible :-)!
The harder it gets to declutter, the more it is attached to fantasy life - but the secret surprise, is the amazing feeling you have in the days that follow. I have never, ever regretted a single fantasy item I’ve given away - and I’ve had some expensive fantasies! When you are compelled to learn the lesson about valuing the life you prioritize, you’ll stop wasting time, money and space on holding on to your fantasies. Try it, with something smaller and easier, you will feel so much better!
Decluttered tones of yarn and fabric this week… The stuff I have left I’m excited to use because I actually have a doable plan to use it. I’m now free to do it because I don’t have to finish the other projects first out of a weird sense of duty. Thank you for teaching us this freedom.
Wonderful Michelle! ❤️
Same here about decluttering both yarn and fabric. I kept only the cotton yarn and got rid of a trash bag full of acrylic yarn to donate. As for the fabric I am doing the USE IT OR LOSE IT... I am prepping the fabric and cutting it during the week so the weekend when Dad is home I can have a few hours of interrupted sewing... So freeing.
Watched this video this morning and then reflected on it for several hours. Opened up a drawer in my desk to see lots and lots of art supplies that are never going to be used. I boxed up the ones that someone else can use and tossed the rest. What a wonderful feeling of lightness! Thanks so much for sharing about the fantasy self and decluttering. It's a practical help for so many people to realize they don't need to beat themselves up for "failing" to do 20 different hobbies!! 🙂
My constant striving for the fantasy self I thought I should have been was making me ill, exhausted, and depressed. I used simple decluttering and then minimalism to reinvent myself, and I am so happy now. I feel energized and content. Thank you so much for your encouragement and the wise words you share.
Oh wow, this hit me hard. I too have lots of Fantasy Hobbies. You pretty much hit them all. I did donate a bunch of yarn last fall. I also 'gave up' my stamping hobby when I got married, as I really didn't have time, and gave all of my supplies to my friend who I knew would appreciate them.
I have AD/HD - Inattentive Type and I really have to remind myself as well of what is important in my life and what it will take for me to get there. I also have to remind myself from time to time "Will what I'm doing, help me get where I want to be".
I did not feel like 'Adulting' or doing "Today" and you kind of put it back into my face. Good timing. Thanks for your videos. I too am a 'messy'. I too am a 'slob'. I too have too many hobbies. I do need to work on simplifying my life and be who I need to be to my husband and my son.
Well, You did it! You actually led me to evaluate my exercise equipment. I am a "wanna be" Fitness Fanatic. I want to be the most fit 65 year old. I have collected simple equipment - dumbbells, bands, kettle bells, mats, etc. to exercise at home on days that I don't go to the Gym. And I have actually done that exactly ZERO times! They are out the door to the car now and to the thrift store Monday Morning!
I am working now on '"What do I want to do that I don't get to do?" Making new plans. Trying to sort who I want to be and want to do vs. "My Fantasy- Self"
There’s such relief and release acknowledging our fantasy self. It truly unloads a hefty burden.
“Never half-ass two things. Whole-ass one thing” -Ron Swanson
Having so many hobbies, makes me feel like a failure as I cannot devote time to them all. So, I crochet baby blankets for women who choose life, working on low carb lifestyle recipes. I only have time for two along with family, friends and church. But I think I found a good balance of doing for others and self. Thanks for the reality check reminder!
I have lived for the fantasy self for so many years. I was a working single mother, with the fantasy of homesteading, I actually did it for several years, I have a degree in Home Economics and desire to be an artist, I raised my children, teaching them the things that interested me, they even learned the periodic table along with their spelling words. Times changed, life was lived, I am 75 now and recognize that seasons of life change. I really don’t feel gardening, let alone farming, is what I could still do. I’ve recently given up quilting, which took up too much space and time, I’ve limited the number of volunteer things I do. The things I enjoy are daily Zen Doodles (ink drawing) and water color. TH-cam tutorials are my entertainment. You are right fantasy vs season of life reality is different. My joy comes from living in a somewhat minimalist manner, stop shopping and bringing things home. Simplicity is calming, living with mindfulness is the best for me.
I don’t know who described me to you but they really know me well and now you do too!
I’ve only just found you tonight and listened to this at bedtime. Im going to ponder on this for about an hour and write down the life I truly want. The hobbies and supplies that I will actually use. I tend to monetize a hobbie/idea and buy supplies to make to sell. The planning and shopping for materials is so fun and exciting and once all I need to do is to DO IT, I don’t. I get “busy”, distracted, or just tied up in other “very important” endeavors.
Thanks for the kick in the butt that I really needed.
I love this Rachel! It’s always so interesting to hear about other people’s fantasy selves…I gave up a lot of crafting stuff too. I would buy stuff for like sewing and quilling and felting but never get around to it! Sold it all. 💪
Yes! I think it’s the buying and planning that’s the hobby, not the doing. 😂 ❤️
Nourishing Minimalism WORD#
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Loved this! One line that really resonated with me was, “ It’s amazing how much weight there is in expectations.” That was a real aha moment for me!
Yes!!!! Perfection is the enemy of the Good!!
For me - I’ve been a case manager for yrs and enjoyed it very much - going to peoples homes and talking and helping them but also cons to job all the traveling - trying to find a clean bathroom ( esp when restaurants closed during CoVID) so I was getting a little venting and someone in office every other day says - when you going to grad school - When You Going To Grad School? I thought ok maybe that’s where I’m suppose to be. Long story short - that’s a fantasy self and once I left grad school ( no didn’t get a degree but finished one class/ 1/2 semester on line) and reached more contentment God opened a door and a case manager job open - long story short but in 2 weeks I start that job with the highest pay I’ve ever had due to all my case management experience. In short fantasy gives debt ( dissatisfaction/ disappointment) but reality plus passion leads to inner happiness and personal wealth.
I very much agree! Fantasies leaves us with debt, dissatisfaction and disappointment. That’s wonderful you found what you enjoy and that pays what you want as well! ❤️
This was great! I let go of cross stitch embroidery and donated all my supplies to a nurse that I knew loved to cross stitch with her daughter. Also I let go of a lot of exercise equipment when I became true to myself and realized I only like yoga and more gentle exercises. I let go of all my black clothing and shoes because those are not true to me. I’m still learning how to let go of perfectionism and repeat to myself daily that Practice makes progress.
Well said! I was a fantasy gardener, made several large beds, years later a new job and health issues meant weeds took over. Now, at 66, I’m turning beds into grass and being choosy about what I keep. Ridding my yard of thistle is this summer’s priority.
I have far too many art supplies - Pastels, water colour paints, acrylic paints, calligraphy pens/ inks the list goes on….. Th e reality is that I will never find enough time to,become proficient at all these mediums. Also - I spend a lot of time organising all my art supplies 🤯 I need to get real!
THANK YOU, Rachel!
I could write a novel addressing all the amazing content of your three "Fantasy Self" videos, so I'm keeping my comment simple: THANK YOU!
You put-into-words a crucial insight that has been fermenting at the back of my head for some time. We hear certain words and phrases all the time and on the surface we understand their meaning - wonder why we can't just "simply" do it - you have illustrated how "simple" and "not-so-simple" coexist (love that term in the decluttering context) and why we both "can" and "cannot" do everything we set our minds to. Again, THANK YOU!
Physics professors out there will recognize the principles at play here. Even we non-science types understand physics... ;-) we just use more down-to-earth language to talk about it.
Homeschooling and cooking are my priorities right now. I've had to give up hobbies due to the way I approach things. I'm an all of nothing type person. When I was deep into knitting and quilting, it's all I wanted to do. I felt annoyed by my kids' demands. I knew I just had to put it away for awhile. What is the point of making a sweater for a kid when the process involves me distracting them with Tv or whatever. I know this isn't the case for a lot of moms; I wish I could be more balanced, but I have to be honest with myself.
That is a good point Anne! That is likely why I have to approach it this way. Thanks for sharing! ❤️
I really appreciate these videos. I do have a hard time letting go of hobby stuff, though I am taking steps by just *not buying more* because I already have enough sock yarn, enough dress material, way more than enough embroidery floss. I’m trying to make better use of it too by teaching my daughter who is also inclined to craftiness to knit so the yarn will get used faster. I too have many fantasy selves that I must learn to set free.
Assisted living homes would probably love the yarn
I just decluttered all of my homeschooling supplies I was saving to make hands on activities. I fantasized about making them but never did. I was trying to fit an image I saw on TH-cam. I let it go and it feels great! I guilted myself into keeping this stuff for years thinking my kids will be so smart. But I was so overwhelmed by the amount of things I had and all the ideas that I did nothing with it!! Talk about guilt!! Accepted who I am and let go of my fantasy self
Awesome Erica! ❤️
I’ve decluttered tons of kitchen tools and entertaining dishes! My fantasy self liked to set fancy tables and make fancy food for my guests. My actual self came to realize that I barely have guests over for dinner and I don’t even like to cook very much! 😂 Now when I have my kids or friends over for dinner, I keep the dishes and food simple and focus on enjoying the company. Thank you Rachel for making it feel ok. Someone is enjoying lovely things from the thrift store! 😊
That’s wonderful Rose! I love the beautiful table settings too… but gave them up and it’s so much easier to clean up when it’s simple. ❤️❤️❤️
@@Nourishingminimalism it truly is easier. It’s so nice when you have time to reply! Have a great day! 😊
I closed my clinic about a few years ago to be able to take care of my kids full time, I enjoy being at home, being here in the morning when they head off to school, be here when they get back home, make them dinner ect ect.. I worked with the public for 28 years and it became overwelming at one point, it gave me lots of anxiety and I already suffer from anxiety since I was a child due to very strict and sometimes violent parents. So I enjoy spending time with the kids and doing things with them, encouraging them and treating them kindly, something that my parents lacked doing with me so it's very healing. Even though I am very good at working with the public, even though I do still get job offers, for now I prefer to be home. I still worked part time as a massage therapist from home, but since the pandemic hit, I stopped. And I am enjoying peaceful time when I can. I will perhaps start again when I feel ready or choose another type business to work from home, still trying to figure that out.
I found my calling though in doing activism for animal rights and the environment. After I saw how much animals suffer on farms, slaughterhouses and other exploitative industries, I switched to plant-based, my lifestyle, and been doing activism. It is gratifying and gives me a sense of puporse.
Thank you for your videos, I have watched them a few times, it motivates me to clean and declutter and I've also learned to let go of the fantasy self. I really want to reach the minimalist home. It's still a working process, I do little bits almost daily. Some days, I don't know where to start, so I just choose a small area at a time. Congrats on your front yard cleanup, I'm trying to motivate myself to start tackling my yard tomorrow, lol. thanks again
That’s wonderful Sandra, that you were able to see that and be home with your kids, and know what lights you up! ❤️❤️
thank you💗💓
Well that was a really great one and that really made so much sense to me like I have sewing machines and I do not sit down so I took a yarn out of my house last year I had yarn out the yin yang and I cannot crochet a dishcloth. And I have sketchbooks and I have cookbooks and I have all of these things and I don't do any of them and until I watch this today I didn't realize that those are my fantasy hobbies and they're not achievable. I have enough trouble just keeping up with my yard!
Different really really helpful and thank you so much and I really appreciate it
I have decluttered craft supplies to a home school co-op, friends and relatives. The three hobbies I chose to continue are sewing, painting and jewelry making. All the other stuff was just getting in my way and blurring my focus and want to create. Thanks for another Great video!
Yessssss!!!!! This video got a standing ovation from me!!! A few years ago we thought we wanted an urban homestead as well. We put in hours of hard work making an amazing garden, setting up systems and even got chickens for eggs and animals for meat. We had to buy all kinds of special equipment for this as well. Fast forward a few years later and we are sooooo done with the whole urban homestead thing. Lol We realized that we wanted to spend our time going camping as family, going biking, hiking, swimming, etc. We did not want to be stuck at home tending animals and gardens all the time. So we sold the animals and let the garden go and I couldn't be happier to not have that all on my plate. 😬 We also abandoned our fantasy of moving out of town into several acres when we realized how much physical work it demanded taking care of property like that. My husband and I don't want to be stuck with having to take care of a farm in our 80's and 90's, which would be extremely hard on older bodies. Letting go of that fantasy has been very freeing!!
What a relief! I grew up around farms I remember all the work! I always have to remind myself- I don’t want to milk account tri today. That’s why I pay someone else to do it. 😆 ❤️
During lock down I decided to tackle all the projects/crafts that I had never had the time to do before. And it was quite satisfying to get so much out of the dark recesses where they had been waiting for my attention and DO them.
But honestly, looking back, it was more graft/work than fun.
I came to realize that many of my fantasies were totally mismatched to my actual inclinations and they actually sucked joy and energy from me.
I wish I’d had the sense to just get rid of them even though I did in fact have the fortitude to complete them.
Good for you for doing them! IYS wonderful that you’ve come to realize what you enjoy/don’t enjoy. Yes, you put in a lot of work, but now you can have confidence in your decluttering decisions. ❤️
Rachel, you are definitely not lazy! You are so right about the fantasy self! We see that you prioritize by putting your children /family first! Very commendable!! Great example to all!! I love seeing you all working together! To some of us that is a fantasy! No, we can't do it all! You are definitely accomplishing a lot! The concept of nutritious cooking, attending to your children, inside/ outside home maintenance, that is a huge success! I admire you! I am sure a lot of others do to! Once again, your children are such nice children! Your neighbours are lucky to have you live near them! Thanks for the video!
❤️❤️❤️
You addressed the issue that others had about why you don't just do those fantasy self things with grace. Good job! You made a good point. There are only so many hours in the day and you really have to prioritize.
Ma'am! YES! The heaviness of expectation I put on myself vs. evaluating realistic capabilities for where I am right now. This video was so good and so needed for me today. Thank you so much!
I love this video. I now hear myself saying .. is this my fantasy self?? And YES IT IS.. a lot!
Today I decluttered a Chinese calligraphy set that someone gifted me and I have never used. I like doing fancy writing, but I can't be bothered to learn how to use the special ink and brushes!
I have some nice pens that I use for the writing, and that's enough.
Actually doing 2 things is more meaningful to me than hoping to do 15. When I don’t manage the planned and hoped for activities I disappoint myself. Like the skinny jeans in the closet it brings me down. I’d rather enjoy my accomplishments than feel I’ve let myself down . Right on Rachel!
🦋appreciating how you brought us through this process of thinking through fantasy vs. realities & priorities (family first). You are an excellent teacher!
Aw thank you Mercy ❤️❤️
My hobbies is an issue. I have so many, but I only do each thing a little. I have really tried to evaluate what I should let go of, but I Can not bear the thought of letting any of it go.
Thank you Rachel! In order to enjoy my hobby, I must focus on one project at a time and complete it (like a quilt) or it is stressful rather than fun. You are always encouraging us to be kind to ourselves and others 🌱🍞💕
I love this fantasy self concept, I think it might be the one that got me to subscribe. It’s helped me declutter even more since- clothes, books, kitchen things, tools etc.
So so true about expectations! This is still in process for me, sorting these expectations out.
One example is my Yiddish books. I’m a language person and studied Yiddish for a year in the 90s and loved it. I have a good dictionary and some probably kind of rare language literary journals etc. that I intended to read and work through and what not. But it’s been well over 20 years and I’ve hardly used any of them, but they’ve moved with me a zillion times. I think I’m ready to release them at this point, I think maybe. Especially if I find someone who would really value and appreciate and use them.
Oh Rachel, I loooove Farm City! - - This video is some great food for thought, thank you!! I have learned EVERYTHING is time, even something as simple as a trampoline for our kids. It takes time to set it up, time to maintain, time to repair, or time to take down and dispose of at some point. I was willing to spend the time for a trampoline but I'm not willing to spend the time for say an above ground pool. We do have chickens and ducks and a small garden and this is where I feel comfortable. I know that right now we can't and I don't want to spend more time effort on more animals, and that's perfectly okay.
Yes! We trade time for everything! ❤️
Thank You Rachel. 💜😎💜
Once again you are "spot on" with your "deeper dive" of our fantasy selves.
I once had a fantasy of sitting at my beautiful desk and earning a living by writing children's books. Last summer I injured my back while lifting a large potted plant and sitting was so painful for several weeks that I realized that the real me doesn't enjoy sitting still for prolonged periods of time.
I am more of a large muscle physical de-stresser.
Thank You 💜 also for the 3 hobby guideline.
Turning "fun" into work and starting too many "projects" has left me exhausted and discouraged in my past.
Learning how to be kind to myself is an ongoing lesson.
Excellent video, Rachel!
I watched it twice. I decided that my 3 hobbies will be cooking school, painting, and sewing.
The rest is going to be packed up and donated.
I do live on a homestead, with chickens, ducks, and goats. I have help doing chores with our birds and goats. I just can’t give up the homestead, garden, and canning the produce.
You really made me take a hard look at fantasy self!
I do appreciate you, Rachel!
You always encourage me to be better, to do better, and I am that much closer to be a minimalist!
♥️🙃
Are you in cooking school or teaching cooking school? Either way, sounds fun! ❤️
I’m in a cooking school.
I have always wanted to be a chef.
Now I am going to be.
It is a lot of fun!
Thank you ❤ I found your channel a couple of weeks ago and it helps me to calm down. I am on my decluttering journey for about 6 months. I can see the progress already, however some days I feel down. Your videos help me to realize what's going on in my head. Thank you for your time and effort that you put to prepare your content ❤
Every time I watch one of your videos, I am newly amazed at how you get to the very core of an issue. So much of our clutter is the paraphernalia that accompanies our hobbies and projects. Becoming realistic about our limitations is the key. Letting go of our fantasy self is a liberation. Thank you, Rachel. EDITED to add about perfectionism: There is nothing wrong with buying something ready-made every now and then. I used to make everything myself, from meals to soft furnishings. I wore myself out trying to be superwoman (or supergran!). I now know better. Giving yourself permission to take things easy occasionally isn't a failure.
Very good point! It’s important to gauge our energy for what we require of ourselves in day to day life. Eating/feeding our family is what’s important- not always that we made it ourselves. ❤️
I appreciate your honesty. This is me! I need to start evaluating!
Thank you Rachel.
I love your channel. I wish I could just stop by and talk over coffee! 😊☕
🥰🥰🥰
Thanks for this video. At this point in time I am raising my kids, home educating them and renovating my home. I’ve been so frustrated because there are a bunch of other things I wish I was doing, but I just can’t make it happen right now without neglecting these ‘top of the list’ things. Time to let it go. Remembering that this a season and that hopefully when the renovating is done I’ll have more time again does help. Also, that I’ve chosen to make these things my priority. No one is twisting my arm… I can do more or less what I want.
Yes! Acknowledging that WE are the ones making it a priority helps do much! ❤️
I'm married, in my late 20's and I have a billion fantasy selves... But the biggest two of them are in totally opposition... One - a happy, 1950's style housewife with fancy dresses, who stays at home and enjoy cleaning, preparing delicious food every day for family, taking special care for needs of hers husband and children. On the other side there's a business lady, who goes to the office every day on heels with perfect manicure and elegant hairstyle. She is wearing suits, has an amazing career and earns a lot of money. She is travelling all around the globe and spends her weekend in a good SPA with her partner (no children included). I love them both and I cannot decide, which one I want to be.
I get that. ❤️
I struggle with simplifying my hobbies too. What I have decided that has helped is that I only crochet in the colder months because it just feels to hot the rest of the year. And I’ve also decided to read at least 1 book a month instead of a week. These limits have actually helped me enjoy those hobbies more.
That's great! I found I enjoy things more if I have limits in place for myself too. It's like we have to fight the "more is better" idea constantly.
Love your videos ! Tbh, I consider watching minimalist bids ( & decluttering) & watching other personal growth vids a hobby !
Haha !
Yes I can relate to this “fantasy self” such a good video letting go of Expectations ❤️💖💝✅
My fantasy self is the only thing that keeps me going. I got rid of a lot of stuff that belonged to my fantasy self, and I lost the will to keep trying. It was like, "What's the use?". I'm 67. I know that I'm never going to be the hostess with the mostest, or the chic city girl who marries the rich handsome guy in the tuxedo, swanning around our Grecian garden with marble statues, sipping champagne, but I still need the fantasy. I suppose it's childish, but fighting it only makes me give up on life. I stopped cleaning the house, taking care of myself, and I barely kept up with paying the bills. Sometimes I forgot to pay the bills for months. So I decided that I need my fantasy self, and I'm keeping her.
It's good you realized what you needed. ❤️
I hear you on those damn mosquitos. When we moved to Minnesota, I specifically asked the realtor about mosquitos. He bald-faced lied to me and told me not worry about them in the day time. Haha! He should have said in the day time only IF you are in the blazing sun, but don't be anywhere near the shade or a pond (of which Minnesota has at every street corner it seems). And then there are the ticks. 😒
Ugh- yes! We don’t have as many as you do… my parents lived there for a while, bugs were bad! ❤️
@@Nourishingminimalism Yes, the bugs are annoying here, as is the humid summers. (I don't mind the winters though.) We drove through Montana once on our way to Spokane. We stopped at a Denny's or IHop in Bozeman. Can't remember which. It was back in 2003 (where has all the time gone?). Beautiful state you have there!
Thank you for this video Rachel😊.
This has helped me so much. Thank you! With your wise words my idea of gardening is now 2 pots and some herbs. Maybe 3 pots and a zucchini plant.
Thank you for posting this video ☀️
I think that this video gave many that Ahhh...haaa.....moment. Sometimes it takes someone showing a different perspective. Thank you for making me realize that I am normal.
Preach girl!
Also, I can’t seem to think of any recent fantasy hobbies that I have let go of, but I can easily think of a few that I’d love my husband to make peace with letting go of! I might get him to watch this video… okay, here’s one that we both let go of (although I think we might still have a few large backpacks hidden behind the camping stuff that we haven’t parted with): the idea of back country camping. We are car-camping people. That’s that. Maybe we’ll do overnight canoe trips “someday” or maybe out kids will, but we never did ANY in 20 years together and we’re not getting any younger, so it’s not looking too likely!
I get the camping stuff… I wanted to do back country camping too! But my husband has ptsd from too many floods during Boy Scout camping trips, and I often rains at night in the mountains, so we always leave early. I finally admitted that we need to just rent forest service cabins so we don’t stress about the weather! ❤️
@@Nourishingminimalism yeah! It all feels the same once you’re out there! Thanks for the comment reply and the video! It’s hard not to get jealous or self-critical when I hear of friends who go overnight canoe camping with kids… it’s usually only for one or two nights, but still. I’ll try to not get hooked on these feelings next time and be more self-accepting!
Love that you told your story while we watched your transformation of your side bed.
BOOKS my fantasy self is going to read all these books and it will help change my life. I realized that I like stories( true stories, history stories and adventures) and got rid of all the self helps me to declutter and downsizing. My fantasy self is I am full time care giver and my passion in journaling, doodling, urban sketching which covers the 3 hobbies and letting the rest go today. Thanks and keep reminding us of letting go of a fantasy life that is not realistic or obtainable
Thank you for this video Rachel! I discovered you a few months ago and this is my favorite video of you. I love how pragmatic and honest you are, this concept of fantasy self is fantastic! It resonates a lot with me and I’m sure it will guide me in the future. For my part, I don’t have a lot of clutter, but I do have too many hobbies and in the end, end up doing none of them , disappointing myself. Looking at your life in an honest way and choosing two or three hobbies is a great idea! ☺️
Wow! So much great information, I’m going to be thinking of this today. I got so overwhelmed by my hobbies I stopped them all. Thanks to you today I now realise when it’s all or nothing it inevitably leads to burn out. Which is where I am now. I’ve been Gardening, doing diy, up cycling, crocheting, writing, journaling and making woodwork projects. I work and have grown up children and grandchildren nearby also ageing parents! I have fibromyalgia and arthritis, I knew something must change but I didn’t know where to start. I’m going to pick 3, maybe make them seasonal so I don’t need to drop anything just not do them all at once. Thank you, thank you 🙏 did I say ‘thank you?’ 😄🙏😂
Wonderful plan! ❤️❤️❤️
I'm just on this journey now I've so many hobbies and find it hard to choose so I'm in the process of letting go of a few and concentrating on the ones I keep...i love your videos found them a couple of months ago after doing a lot of decluttering in different parts of my life ty xx
I gave up rug hooking and card making. It took me time to realize that while it was perfect for some of my friends, it just wasn't for me. Out went all the supplies and I haven't thought of them until your video!
That’s was a great realization! ❤️
This was so insightful. Examples are very helpful. Bravo.
Thanks, this was helpful to hear.
Needed this today. Thank you.
I am now devoting more time to my cross stitching hobby😊😊
Never thought of it that way. I've definitely lived in my fantasy life. Realistically, I'm OK with what is manageable every day. I have a small urban garden that I can manage. My fantasy self would love to be growing 3 times the amount of veg. Not realistic and I have to be OK with that. Thanks again for a great video. Looks like you made a lot of progress with the help of your family.
I really LOVE this so much. The idea of 3 things really speaks to me and makes a lot of sense - awesomr video!
This makes so much sense. Thank you so very much for sharing this with us. 💕NonnaGrace 🐓
So perfectly presented! And yes, how true! Watching and hearing you say this out loud is just so inspiring for me.
Also wanted to add that this video came at the perfect time because today I am tackling a major declutter project in our laundry/storage room. I have sooooooo much craft stuff it's insane. We homeschool so I have lots and lots of items to do Pinterest worthy learning activities with as well. What I have found is that we rarely do these activities. I am learning to give up the Instagram worthy homeschooling mom fantasy self and just be content with knowing I can be basic and that's totally ok. I don't have to be the mom who does all the amazing sensory bins and science experiments and post pictures on Instagram of our beautiful poetry tea time. Lol I can just be a regular mom that teaches her son at home and all the bells and whistles aren't required and it doesn't make me any less of a mom or a teacher. If I spend less time managing all the things that go with this fantasy self maybe we can actually have the time to enjoy some of the benefits of homeschooling. So I am glad I saw this video today since I am about to be faced with all kinds of fantasy self items in my declutter project today.
Yes!! 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻
This is so, so good - Thank You!
This was so good! Thank you Rachel! I like the idea of living in the countryside, but at the moment my life is in the city. But we have tried to go in the wilderness every week and have a fire in the forest. And I have my Garden, in my balcany 😂. I have also cottage, but it is so far away, that I can not farm there. But I can cut the trees there and enjoy nature. I started to paint and I want to walk in the forest. Those are my hobbys and my litle garden 😂
Thank you for this video 💕👌👍
Watching y'all pick up leaves, reminds me of when I accidentally picked up a garden snake bare handed 😂😂😂 freaked me out for a moment!
Hmmm… I know that I need to have actual hobbies and that that is part of self-care. I don’t know if they would count as hobbies to most people, but I’ll go with swimming (only in summer months these years / generally speaking), reading Liane Moriarty novels (I happily purchased the most recent one last week! Hard cover! Bought for myself! In a real store as opposed to online or as a gift from someone!) and… wait for it… doing dishes while listening to podcasts or watching your videos! 😂🌷✌🏼☀️
Have you seen "The Biggest Little Farm" on Netflix? You'd love it. The photography is stunning & you can't help fantasizing a different lifestyle through it. I always dreamed of being a cowgirl; riding horseback every day, driving cattle - doesn't mean it was ever going to happen.
I have! I did enjoy it! It’s a beautiful place, I love how they planted the trees, and watching how they improved the soil. ❤️
It was interesting and inspiring. That is a really difficult part to declutter
When you said scrapbooking, I laughed because for the last 20 years I have been buying those supplies and have done very little of it but I still have the fantasy that one day all my photos will be in albums and keepsakes for my two Sons to have long after I’m gone….I guess I really haven’t been able to give up on this idea. I will let you know how it goes.
I scrapbooked for years and have over "33" 12x12 books that are over 3 inches thick. I also have numerous albums of various sizes. All on shelves and behind doors, no one looks at them. What will my children do with them when I'm gone? I think a box system would have been better - who knows?
@@ap85jp87 thanks for that idea.
You're a fantastic artist - I have a vision of you using 2 shades of cement paint and painting large flagstones on your driveway! :)
Such a smart video ! When the fantasy meets the reality (one of my favorite sayings) changes everything. Off topic, but are those big cracks in your house foundation? I live in the desert, in the southwest, in a gated manufactured home community. Fortunately our homes are surrounded by pretty stones, so all I have to do is keep the weeds picked. Container gardening is what I prefer, so I can move them around as needed, and whatever I have planted doesn't go crazy. I have always had a fantasy of having a small home on my own land. I'm 63 and widowed, with 2 young adult children. Maybe one day I will make my little patch of heaven come true :) Thanks for sharing Rachel, I always enjoy your videos. 🥰💐🌷🌱🌞🌛🏜✝💗
It’s a crack in the facia … the foundation is ugly, so the previous owners covered it with a concrete facia, which is now crumbling.
You go girl👍I am so impressed !!! You inspire me☺️🤗
Hey now… I feel called out about buying new journals. 😉 I was with you… until then. Lol just kidding. Great content. Thank you.
😂 I’m preaching to myself there too. Lol
I love this!! 3 hobbies is very doable :)
I needed this. Thank you. 💛
Ouch.... use the journals I have before buying more. I gotta get to writing.
thank you for these videos they are helpful and it brings helpful ideas it brings some kind of freedom to me im like yes she is right i dont need to go on some crusade lol
This is great, Rachel. Have you ever shared your sourdough bread recipe?
💗💗💗
Spent time with the grands and did some sightseeing.
Do you park in your garage ?
It looks like you blocked your driveway making. It hard to get into the driveway.
Can you not collect rain water in a tank?
We don’t park in the garage. The pile is to go to the dump, just have to make a day to do that.
And yes, we just set up rain barrels, not sure how much rain we’ll collect, it’s Montana, so dryer than other states.
This morning I went through my pants and I had to take out 75% of them since they didn't fit. I feel so much better.
Awesome job Emily!
@Emily U. Relate👏. I got so accustomed to seeing the same clothes, masquerading as a wearable wardrobe, and taking up closet space. Only when I really made myself try them on could I clearly see how many garments were a hard No. And, being completely honest with myself, how many were likely to never, ever fit me again. I felt very accepting and centred after that exercise, and was able donate much of the pile.