My Aggressive Toddler | Born Naughty?
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 3 ต.ค. 2019
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1 in 20 children, aged between five and sixteen, suffer with serious behavioral issues ranging from refusing to eat, anti-social behaviour, disruptive and violent tendencies. Mental health disorders in children can be hard to diagnose and for some parents not knowing whether their child suffers from a mental condition or just badly behaved can add more frustration to an already stressful home life.
In this series, experts Dr Ravi Jayaram and Dr Dawn Harper, along with clinical psychologists, are going to help parents fast track the process to determine whether their children need medical help or if they are simply out of control.
In this Episode:
3 year old Billy is a sweet but troublesome kid with a scary temper and a compulsion to put things in order. Even though he’s young he can get very aggressive, throwing large objects around and has even split his mum's lip open. Robyn, his mother, is scared that when he gets to school age he’ll be outcast and alone because of his behavioural issues, and that time fast approaches. Because Autism runs in the family and Billy shows some of the tell-tale signs, Robyn suspects this might be the reason for his unusual behaviour. But could there be something less obvious behind it all?
Charlie is 8 years old and has already been chucked out of school. He has major anger issues and has no problem taking it out on his elders with his mum, Maxine, bearing the brunt of the punishment. Being kicked down the stairs and regularly attacked by her own son can be disheartening especially when no one even takes her seriously. Police don’t tend to believe you when you say you’re 6 year old is out of control and beating you up. Charlie shows a lot of the major signs of autism, turning from his usual self to this scary ball of rage at the slightest trigger, but getting help or a diagnosis for him is proving impossible with so much dismissal and doubt. Will getting a proper a diagnosis give Maxine the answers she needs to help Charlie deal with his aggressive and anti-social behaviors before it’s too late?
#BornNaughty #Autism
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„bed , please. C‘mon now, please. Come to bed, please.“
Find the mistake.
I haven't seen anyone give any consequences for bad behavior. They just constantly allowed them to do what they want.
Autism doesnt always mean tantrums. My 5year old was diagnosed with autism when he was 2 years old. It's severe and he's non verbal. I can honestly say that he has never had a tantrum. He is sweet, loving and really calm and happy.
I am autistic & never had tantrums either but I did result in self harming behaviour as a child. My sister on the other hand used to headbutt & bite people as a toddler & still throws tantrums as an adult. I have learnt the best way to deal with it when she is in meltdown is to back away & leave her to calm down or it just escalates to where she hits me or throws something at me.
My sister & joke we are like yin & yang, we are so similar in some ways but complete opposites in another, since we were babies I was fiercely independent & as i got older i didn't ask for help even when i should have. My sister on the other hand would let everyone to everything for her if she could, she has bad anxiety but even with support she struggles to do a lot for herself. Its like I get distressed if I have to ask for help & she gets distressed if she has to do anything herself. It interesting to compare how differently we are affected by out autism & how we are just different & similar in general.
I am also very calm, like too calm, I had to learn not to let people take advantage of me because little things that bother other people literally do not bother me. This does make me good with looking after toddlers & elderly people though as I can be very patient & find it easy to treat them nicely even if how they are acting would frustrate most people. Obviously being autistic i often didn't (& still don't) get the intent of why people were saying things either, which actually made dealing with some bullies easy as I didn't realize them asking if i liked "nerdy star trek" was supposed to be a bad thing & embarrass me, i responded happily that i did, especially Voyager & that sci-fi is my favourite genre, the bully was stunned & as my response was not usual they didn't know how to respond so walked away.
For me it's the little things that distress me, I have sensory processing disorder so for example as an adult I keep wet wipes in the car as ever since i was a child if i got melted food on my hands & it dried i would be internally screaming but actually just sit there quietly with my hands out, waiting for the car to stop so I could go to the closest sink & wash my hands. When I has my first nosebleed at age 4 it was in the back of the car, i just picked up a tissue & kept gently dabbing at my nose (it wasn't too bad) only when we got to my sports lesson & mum turned around to tell me we were here & to gather my things did she realize I had a nose bleed, she asked why I didn't tell her & I didnt know why. If a restaurant changes its layout I cant focus & feel all uncomfortable, like as if I have entered a battlefield. If my favourite drink has changed its packaging it's like my best friend has had a face transplant, like that jarring to me. I know this reaction is not normal & i find it embarrassing so try to act as normal as possible & distract myself.
My sister & I didnt get diagnosed until adulthood, I now use sensory toys, like autism chews, which have helped me relax when i get overwhelmed, I also do not force myself to do "normal" things because I now know that they are not so difficult 7 distressing for mose neurotypical people. Although i would have like this information sooner it does explain a lot & now I am able to use tools, including my sensory toys, to help me. I am glad to hear your son got a diagnosis at a young age, I hope him & you are receiving all the support you need.
Sheila DMJ , I agree with you my son was also diagnosed at 2 years old and he was non verbal til the age of 7 , but he never threw a tantrum , he is the best kid a parent could ever ask for , and I wouldn't trade him for anything in the world , so smart , he may not always understand things in this crazy world . But he tries and doesn't ask for much and doesn't make fun of anyone else. An Autistic child can learn , it just might take him a little longer , they learn a little different than others is all , that's y they call it a spectrum , lots of different kinds of autism .
Sammy Ariel You talk too much 😒😡
@@CookiesAndCream-ux1lr and you give unnecessary opinions. That wasn't very nice and if you don't have anything nice to say then don't say anything at all.
Thank you for saying this! I've worked with children who have autism for 3 years, on all ends of the spectrum and MOST (like 90% probably) didn't throw tantrums so I was confused by that being one of the characteristics.
I have ADHD, and I recall hitting my mom when I was like, 7. I don't remember what happened next, but guaranteed I didn't do that shit again. 😬🤣🤷🏽♀️💀
I agree 😂. It ain't happen again
If I’ve done that. I won’t be alive or in the hospital.
Some kids don't have control over their behavior. So, u can punish them to kingdom come. It doesn't affect outcomes, it just creates more chaos. Whilst what ur saying works with a lot of kids, there are many exceptions.
@@juswuzz8929 although someone with his level of development may have violent outbursts, they can still learn it's not okay to strike people. During my outbursts, I only let it out on inanimate objects from that day forward. It's like adversion therapy!
You probably got knocked tf out, that's why you've lost your memory lol
First off I would not read him 3 hours of stories @ bedtime. 2 stories tops then lights out. A three year old should not make the rules. What the parents say goes.
Ikr
Well, the underlying problem was the pets.
So glad the repliers to this message are such perfect parents. I have 3, near adult children and had no problem raising them but I would never criticise parents who are finding it a difficult journey.
Courgette Thank you! It’s hard enough coming on television seeking help for your out of control child, especially when you know it has something to do with your parenting. Just because you all think your better parents doesn’t mean you actually are.....
@@courgette3401 telling someone that kids don't make the rules in the household is not criticising anyone 😂🤣😂
Facts are not criticism
And 9/10 the people who will not be happy about his comment are the ones who kids rule the house 🙈
When did 8 year old be considered a toddler? They might act like one... But what do I know 🤦🤷
I get what you mean. I think the title is about the younger boy but in the description it talks about children up to 16 . Hope this helps 😊
@@agnieszkakozlowska6577 I don't think u got her.She did not mean that.
I was thinking the exact same
They titled it wrong
@@AnitaN844 look in the description I think on the title they were talking about the toddler, but it actually does say older ages in the description 😁
I find it sad so many of these kids don’t have both parents in their lives
I hope Charlie gets the help he needs. He is already violent with his mom. He can hurt her terribly when he becomes a teenager.
He's also huge which is never a good thing. If that was my kid he'd be as tall as me.
charlie special all right.
Ik the kid personally he's 14 now and knows what he's doing he's no murderer and hes resilient from even laying a finger on his mum they have an extremely strong connection
@@confusion2323 Those on the autism spectrum tend to have a strong aversion to harming others.
@@petercdowney agree, autism doesn't mean violent tantrums. He seems to be more bi-polar with these extreme behaviors. And allowing him unfettered access to violent video games is completely absurd - violence breeds violence.
Charlie’s mum is very calm, even when she’s stressed out to the max and he’s hitting her and acting out. How is this lady so very calm under such horrific conditions.
It’s a very difficult and disturbing situation.
"dont hiss at me because ur hungry"
Literally me when im hungry haha
I normally just hiss at people for fun...
Me to I start crying sometimes when Im really hungry I go nuts mentally
LeosRuleTheWorld * same, food isn’t just something to eat, it’s my reason to live
@@hatsunethaddaus596 I hope your joking.
@@hatsunethaddaus596 favorite food?
I’m a single mom, it sucks but you have to also be the disciplinarian, these kids have no structure or discipline, the 3-year-old watching TV from the moment he wakes up until he goes to bed?? Why is it up to an 8-year-old if he goes grocery shopping?
Yup, these kids rule the roost, hence the behaviour.
@@ghostlyvel uhh that DOESN'T mean that your child shouldn't have consequences, expectations, and discipline, in fact, structure is even MORE important for kids with a diagnosis. So because a child has autism, they should rule the household and the parent takes a back seat 🤨 yeah, no.
IF you paid attention to the show it explains why the 8 year old has a hard time going out and doing things.
If the parents think there is something wrong with their children maybe they dont know how to discipline them. Disciplining kids with autism is different from disciplining children without. There's different methods and techniques.
The mom of the older kid did say that she had to call the police several times because her kid was that violent. That's also the reason she got help from professionals.
Please Billy please Billy oh won't you please Billy ..enough with the please.. he's a little child .. you tell him what to do
You sound fun.
good to teach him manners, it's possible to be polite and authoritative
@@Moonshinexmoonshine absolutely, such as please pick up your toys and thank you for picking them up
@@Jessicace 😉
Please implys an option. Pick up your toys, implys do it, or there will be consequences. Please agree with meeeee.
Child in complete control. Mom, set boundaries.. and fast!
I am a single mom of 5. TWO of them have high functioning autism and I just treat them like the rest. With a couple adjustments: 1. Never start a routine unless you plan to stick to it for far longer than you probably want to.
2.Never tell them your plans ahead of time in case they are cancelled. This is far worse than the change in routine, because to them things are black and white. No matter the reason plans are plans.
3. Don't sweat the small stuff. If they are being "weird" and it's not hurting anyone, who cares. If they don't look in eyes, who cares, that's kinda creepy anyway. If they are picky, give them an extra helping of what they will eat and a vitamin.
That being said, hitting and breaking things is not allowed. Ever. Remember children turn into adults and need to be taught right from wrong regardless.
All that is true for autistic adults too. I have worked many years with them.
True, but people don't 'turn' into adults, they learn how to be adults.
Well one of the problems is Turn off that television, And turn off those video games. If you have to remove them completely from the household do it.
Hahahaha you're funny, having a child of needs isn't that easy, trust me.
Sorry but I have three kids one The right has attention deficit disorder and the other one that's Dyslexic. That are both grown adults now have college degrees and I didn't have to have something like that to keep them occupied.
Ok boomer
@@ShelbGoodman you can't use games as a babysitter.
@@lucreziavilante5993 Hahahaha man, to assume is fun. It's not a babysitter. It's my sons communication device. Also, have a great day! 👌👌🤦♀️
I can't have kids so watching this makes me feel like parents deserve medals, it looks like it's the hardest job in the world.
omg it is very hard
It is not this hard. Some of these kids need an ass whoopin. I would not tolerate that for a second.
It's very easy if you are the parent and not the friend of the child not not hard at all having six children well-behaved well-groomed very polite don't speak and interrupt parents etc etc and no young mother is no excuse I was 18 of wonderful children it's time to grow up when you have children 18 year olds fight for their country young men and young women are now adults. Period
It’s hard even when your kids are great children so I cousins imagine having a child with any disabilities.
@@portcityminis that's lazy and abusive 🤷♂️
Actions have consequences. Parents, be consistent ! You are your kids parent not their friend!
Amen!
2x amem
This just sounds like you were emotionally abused though out your life
So few children get such good and comprehensive assessment and appropriate therapy.
When the older boy is acting up he still needs boundaries. Take away his games, lock them up. Work on other activities besides being glued to a tv
I would like to know what video games he’s playing. I would take the Xbox away and he needs to go to school and learn to socialize.
You can't just push an autistic person in to a room and say "learn to socialise". That's like shoving someone with severely atrophied legs out of a wheelchair and telling them to get over it and just walk. Autistic people generally don't understand how and it freaks them out. It would strip away all the means he has to control his processes and will be painful for him. Were my fiancé's processes to be disrupted, he described it as physically painful. He can learn to socialise, but it will need to be a slower and more careful process.
How old was your child when you introduced him to watch TV for more then 3 hours straight?
Exactly! U guys are saying facts
@@thegreenmanofnorwich I practically raised my little brother since I was a teenager my parents were always working so I had to take of him practically since he was born took him to and from the baby sitters than would pick him up when I got out of school did homework with him cook for him I even went to his drs appointment I practically was his mom. I never in my entire life hit him all I needed to do was look at him with that Latina woman stare of death and he told me ok sorry and he knew ok shit I better listen or ima get in trouble he knew I was in charge I always treated him like an average child he was diagnosed at age 3 with autism but I know one day my parents will die one day I will die he needs to be able to handle life much as possible so I always pushed him to his full ability I know he is destined for great things sucks my parents ruined all the work I put in once I moved out they baby him since hes their last kid i showed him so much affection don't get me wrong but when was time to instruct he will listen if you can follow instructions on a damn video game in order to play it you can sure as hell listen to what I'm asking you to do
Kids learn their behaviors and actions from whomever they're around. They learn what they can get away with and what someone will allow. Kids are notorious for pushing buttons but they need structure and they def need discipline.
Very true. And by labeling Charlie as autistic, they just told him it's normal for him to behave that way.
Hearing my mom's voice in the back of my head every time a child said no... *say it again, I dare you*
Same 😭 like “what did you just say? -_-“ aheh nothing mommy dearest 😅
@@miahwalking9935 you close your door and it makes loud noise and you hear footsteps and u wake up in heaven
What in the world...these kids are totally in control...kids without boundaries!!!
Yup, kids without parenting too!
Brats, simple!!
Nope u are wrong
@@juneramsay756 no discipline given to them
That is NOT what is happening here, have some compassion if you are fortunate enough to not be in this situation!
Common thread with all children I've seen that misbehave is too much electronic/screen time.
My son is one and a half years old and he only has to hear the tone of my voice to know I'm being serious , you are the parent and the second you let your child make your decisions they've then gained control over you!
👍
😂stfu
@@crazyhiphopp lol
Exactly
Are you serious ??? There’s a difference if they’re autistic.
I am on the spectrum. Some people commenting seem to think that physical punishment would help. I was beaten on far to many occasions. I was, and am still on the spectrum. All the punishment I received did nothing to help me. I could not relate to my peers, and between school and home punishments I shut down internally to cope. I am now an adult but struggle the same. I am homeless, live in my car, have no friends, feel like an alien, and more.
Diagnosis is not a label. I am glad to see parents that care enough to make sure their children get the assistance they need so they have a chance.
My oldest daughter isn't on the spectrum but has special needs. If she hadn't been given the help that I fought for she wouldn't be where she is today as an adult. She'll always need help with things like paying bills but goes to work on time and prepared and when she has her own place will be able to keep herself with no issues.
I'm sorry that you didn't have that in your life and that you're struggling. You don't deserve to be punished simply because people wish to attack anyone that isn't 'normal'. I hate to break it to them but 'normal' is only a setting for the washing machine, not for people. You have abilities that they can only dream of, and they'll never stop trying to destroy that out of fear. The comments to this video are proof of that.
Stay safe and well, and never give up on yourself. There are people rooting for you, even if you never meet them. Pay them back by creating a happy life for yourself. You deserve it.
every single expert in the world agrees that physical punishment is doing nothing but harm I am so sorry that you had to endure this growing up, I hope that you will manage to get into a better place and get help, and I hope the people who are suggesting it will never have children on their own
I’m so sorry this has happened to you. I had a horrible school experience the entire time I went to school. I was shy, quiet and had no idea how to relate to others. Yet, I guess I was lucky enough to get a job where I was the ‘baby’ of the group. Those people helped me by befriending me-so different rom school! I met my husband there, got married, had five kids (my greatest joy) and became a member of our volunteer fire co as an EMT. Finding something you love, enjoy and are good at can raise your feelings of value. Keep looking for that special part of you-it’s there, when you find it-fly with it. I wish you all the happiness
So sorry that is how you grew up!! Nobod deserves that!!
What a wonderful mum Charlie has!!!! She never gave up on him and just knew that he had something wrong with him and wasn't a naughty unpleasant child! Such a shame that she wasn't listened to earlier in his life. The floor child must of been do confused about how people were reacting to him. I really hope that they now both get the support needed to make thier lifes happier! His mum should go into a job helping other families with children like her son, she has good instincts and is a strong woman and would fight and get the support they need! Unfortunately not all children have a mother like Charlie's and give up on them! Good luck for the future!x
where is Charlie's father in all this ? how come nobody is mentioning the input of his dad but it is mentioned for other races of people ? The child most probably is acting out because there is no male presence in the home yet almost 30 minutes in and this is not mentioned. So happy she finally got a label for his behavior.
She's not that great of a mother, instead of disciplining him, she actually called the police on him when he was just 6 years old. An adult is stronger than a 6 year old she should find out what's bothering him.
@@ocdacceptanceawarenessandi637 needed discipline not the police
@@ocdacceptanceawarenessandi637 it is not nice to judge people when you'r not in their shoes. Keep your opinion to yourself. It is not a fact.
@@josweetlove1537nonsense, all you need is one loving, caring but firm parent and a stable surrounding.
Good fathers are wonderful but are not necessary strictly speaking.
She reads to him - for - 3 - hours !!!!! AAAAgh. Nobody could do that, noooobody!
My son is low functioning autistic who only sleeps maybe 3 hours asleep a night there are times when I’ve read to him from 8pm to 4 am because his anxiety was up from having to go to the store the doctor and multiple other places
In case anyone wants to watch each story separately:
Billy: 01:45
13:15
18:45
24:35
30:05
42:15
Charlie: 06:30
15:20
20:12
28:18
34:37
44:52
Legend
Cheers
@kristinapedia thank you for doing the Lord’s work! I absolutely can’t stand shows that keep switching back and forth between two separate stories. 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
What a thoughtful thing to do 💚
absolute legend
Watching Charlie just tears me up completely🥺 he’s so much like my nephew. Our sweet baby is so kind and bubbly but he has problems with friends, patterns, being very literal, he’s obsessive over trains, and he also made the comment of how he doesn’t like it when other children tell him what he’s supposed to be doing. The biggest problem is how stuck he is on eating what he knows. He hates trying to explain why he does some things because he just doesn’t know. I helped my mom raise him since he was 8 months old so we caught it pretty early. He’s currently being re-evaluated to see if he’s been diagnosed correctly in regards to the spectrum. The doctor thinks it might be Aspergers. It upsets me to see the lack of social skills and how it effects him. I want the world for him. It bothers me so much to think of how judgmental kids and adults alike can be towards autistic children. They’re not bad kids by any means at all, they simply don’t know how to deal with their struggles.
Jackie Stiles aww sorry bout that
Jackie Stiles, You are SO RIGHT! It is the struggle that they go through on a daily basis that breaks your heart. You know the child is caring and has empathy and just wants to get along with everyone, but every attempt just doesn't work and they don't understand why not. It's a terrible thing to watch. I know.
No mention of the Fathers?! SHAME on them! No matter the circumstances, if you fathered a child you have equal responsibility! Well done to the mums and their families, shame on the father and his family for not giving a shit!
I was wondering that the whole time. I’m sure him not having a father has a lot to do with why he’s having anger challenges. When my husband was deployed, my son did as well.
Exactly! So many fathers are failing their children! People look down on single mothers but the mothers are the ones that stuck around.
Labels are thrown a round too easily. Parents refuse to look at their parenting
Jane Doe Maybe talk to your nieces mom. Maybe she could stay with you for awhile and see if her behaviour changes at all. I’d hate for her to have that label forever when in reality it was just a parenting problem.
@@SnapszDuhh I really appreciate your advice but unfortunately her mother sees me as her arch enemy for reasons unknown. She never even changed her daughters diaper when she was a baby cause it made her vomit, how can a mother feel that way of her child baby poop? She has severe narcistic trades, and is also nasty to my old mom who is now taking care of her children. There is no normal, and civil conversation possible with the mother. Shame because I would liked us to be polite for the childrens sake.
@@JaneDoe-sz9oy I understand, my mother is narcissistic too, you sound a great aunt
Single moms ...when the dad isn't around what did you expect
@@curiousgeorge6921 yeah, the deadbeat dad is too occupied with chasing other females instead of teaching his children how to behave, shame.
THose. Are. Not . TODDLERS.
A three year old is a toddler.
Billy is a toddler
Yes they are because they are young. but are you stupid on purpose. Because at my college people are smarter
@@hannahroyle2886He’s a preschooler, NOT a toddler.
Charlie is a nightmare. I dont think we should pander to poor behaviour, e.g. laughing when he is defiant
He has autism go learn something about it.
and your slow
She said he pushed her down the stairs instead of coming and check on her he continued to kick her a serial killer in the making
Exactly my thoughts when I heard it ay 😷
Yup, that kid is going to kill someone yet.
He was throwing a Meltdown he couldn't help that cause him to hurt his mother
He’s a nasty little thing, he wouldn’t last in my house
I totally understand your situation! I went through years of abuse from my son. Since birth, he was different than other babies. He never slept, cried a lot as a baby, began lying about anything, began hitting me, aggressive with other students, I would need to hold him down while he spit, swore and tried to bite me. My husband took a job traveling for work and never came home until midnight because it was too difficult for him to be around our son. My husband had brought us to the USA from Canada, so I was isolated with no family or friends, and alone with my son who would kick the back of my seat in the car and pull my hair, when I picked him up from school. It was years of hell! I hold a university degree in psychology/ social work and have worked with special needs individuals for years before my son was born. I've never seen anyone like my son. Doctor's were baffled! I went to so many professionals for assistance but no one could help. I was at my wits end. Then I stumbled upon an author who wrote about kids like my son. I read all of his books. They were all about individuals like my son. The author of these books is George Lynn, ( Psychotherapist/ Author ) whose practice is in Seattle Washington. I luckily lived in Seattle and was able to get help for my son from George Lynn. I believe his books are on Amazon. It's a difficult road with a child like this. I love my son dearly! Don't give up, parents! But you need to make boundaries for yourself so you have a life.
Cried a lot as a baby, babies cry that's literally all they can do besides pooping lmao
Wow your husband sounds like a real winner
I'm glad you got help, people jump to conclusions and judge us as parents when our children behaves different.
@Deborah - I’m glad life is much better for you now; how wonderful that was moving to Seattle and getting a proper diagnosis. 🇨🇦
Billy's mom I think wanted to hear that he was on the spectrum. Her reaction to hearing he was normal was just off.
yeah because now she has to face the reality
The animals where jacking his bed at night what in the world lmfao
She probably felt bad because she possibly felt it was her fault that her son was not autistic but something she as a mother could not recognise he was sleep deprived.
@Honeysuckle Blossom I have ADHD and have since I was 6, what kind of government money are you talking about? Are you in the UK or something? In the USA you don't get any money for your child(ren) having any sort of disability, however a lot of the medications for ADHD are easily abused meds maybe parents either abuse the meds themselves or sell them, I don't know if that's what happens, I think in this case though it's a little more munchausen-ish than that, I think she wanted to be able to say "I have a child with autism", which is scary, I hope that just because this didn't work that she doesn't try other methods of getting sympathy and attention.
I think it's not Munchausen's By Proxy or the want of money, I think it just comes as a relief to some parents to get at least a diagnosis so that someone will help them figure out how to cope, whether the parents are the initial cause or not, often, they don't know that and just want help. Someone to give "what is wrong," a name and a plan going forward.
My now 5 year old was diagnosed with Autism at 4. I was always told dont treat him different then the others. I expect the same level of respect and discipline from him as i do his sisters. I am aware his sensory issues set him off at times and we handle that accordingly but i feel that if these kids had consistent structure they would shape up a bit more. These moms seem exhausted.
Noel Delahoussaye you sound Ike a good mom
@@bakeface_ Thank You. I enjoy being a mom. And try to give it my best everyday
hi
do you discipline them the same though?
I really felt for the mother when she was emotional over her son being diagnosed. I am glad that she got an answer.
I'd cut the cord to that TV so fast
I've seen Jo Frost on super nanny solve these exact same problems on her show.
Right this isn’t autism or adhd this is bad parenting.....
@@babyluna7414 I mean, they came on the show for help and to be lead in the right direction. For Billy, I’m sure his mom didn’t want to discipline him too hard if it’s something he can’t control. And for Charlie, his mom’s hands were full and has been trying to get a diagnosis for a while. Everyone is different and I understand why they are concerned. They just want the best for their child. They just want to help them.
Sugar plays a HUGE part in misbehavior.
I don't remember ever hitting my parents when I was a kid. If I did, I doubt I'd still be here today. And this is coming from a former "special needs" child.
😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣 YESSSSSS
I would still have the metal screws in my jaw 😂🤣😂🤣😂
I wouldn't even THINK about it
he's on the prison pipeline if he doesn't get the behavior fixed. at some point you might have to smack a child like that down even though i believe it should be the last resort and avoided at all costs.
Former special needs?
I am so blown away by this team of experts. The way they tease out the subtleties of both Billy and Charlie behaviors was incredible. My daughter (now thirteen), who is profoundly autistic, has spent years and years (when younger) in a classroom FULL of Billy's. I used to scratch my head and wonder why these kids are so communicative, articulate, and expressive. In the States, Billy would have EASILY been given the ASD diagnosis (well, in NC where I live). I feel a lot of parents mean well, but they are frustrated and need services, and the County will all too easily comply with the parents and give the DX (and if they don't get the dx, there is a list of professionals who will give the diagnosis). I guess it's good, because the parents need services, but I used to wonder how those kids would "outgrow" their diagnosis, while my daughter just seemed to get worse and worse. And the parents would say "you see? Early intervention WORKS!" Anyhow, I was so impressed with this Team of Specialists- they knew how to drill down and really take a look at Billy's behaviors, and they also knew what to look for with Charlie's behaviors (you wouldn't exactly think "autism" when you see him, but he's older). I also have never heard of "PDA" as a sub-diagnosis, so I found that interesting as well. What a thoughtful series.
hi
@kolsneurtyplcal6315
I would imagine that your daughter was falling through the cracks
in classes where other children dominated the situation and got all the attention for their more overt behavior?
I hope your daughter has gotten more help and you have gotten more support in the past 3 years.
And from your very close experience...what do you think causes the condition, Autisim Spectrum?
That is a benefit of USA healthcare that isn’t discussed. We do absolutely pay out the nose for healthcare but for the most part we get diagnosed and treated much faster than other countries. It’s heartbreaking to watch these kids and parents struggle. I can’t imagine how hard life can be for these families. My heart goes out to them.
PDA is only recognized in the UK and some Commonwealth countries. Not in the USA. It is a huge problem in my own family because my brother has PDA.
Having watched the many children at the start of Supernanny, and the quick discipline, routine ad especially parenting changes introduced, what a difference to parents and children. See very similar behaviours on this show. Good parenting will help children in any circumstances/diagnosis.
How could a mother mistreat her son like this. Television, video games all the time, white bread, soda for breakfast and then He is the one who is responsible?!
Wondering that myself. Sure he might have something but proper nutrition, exercise outside most of the day, cut out all the tv/video games and you'll see a new child.
@@treeyellow4627 you really said this at a time were covid was a problem
I noticed that too. I hate how these doctors don't ask questions about Charlie's living situation....where's his dad? was there any trauma in his early life? what food does he eat? does he have a proper bedtime? I don't doubt he has autism, but still they should've taken a more holistic approach in his diagnosis.
@@jamesconlin5099people could always go out into the countryside/ the forest, even parks.
Some of these comments are awful.
Also very ignorant but also obviously very blissfully unaware of how hard it is to deal with behavioural issues like this!
My son is 6 and is Charlie all over I was lucky as I caught on very early somthing was wrong and my son was diagnosed by the time he was 3 (and it took a year of assessments to get that diagnoses). So no these lables if they are properly assessed are not easily handed out! My son has autism adhd comple emotional dysregulation and ocd and recently diagnosed with a form of tourettes.
It is not as simple as give them a smack or be stricter ect ect..
I have had multiple broken noses and covered in bruises I have been strangled almost stabbed (all knives are out of the way and locked up also anything that could be a weapon for that matter) we do hours of therpys a week and then on top of that I am implanting every thing I'm told by said theripest daily!! I try to be firm with my son where ever possible there is boundaries and there is discipline in my house but he has no control over a lot of things we walk a tight rope every day with any little thing that can set a dangerous or draining meltdown off my son is distraught when he is back in control and thinks about what has occurred but he is not there in the moment he is just left feeling awful when all is said and done. So you learn to pick you battles at times.
Days when I'm not hurt or he has not hurt himself is a win.
Unless you live with this or anything like these parents have please don't comment unless it's with love and support as you have no idea how close to the edge these parents and children could be.
I'm so sorry, Amy. I ^have^ seen kids like this, and though mine were NOT "those kids" (and they are also all grown up now), I remember how completely exhausted and just worn down my friend was. I'd like to ask you one thing, because it made such a night and day difference with their little boy, Joel:
This little boy I knew was about 4 yrs old, and my son was his ONLY friend. His mum had tried EVERYthing including ADHD meds as well as behavioral meds of different sorts, yet nothing made a difference. When he began to hurt/hit his baby sister, his Mum and Dad were at the end of their rope. Our local GP then suggested that ^maybe^ -- and this was a HUGE maybe -- he ^might^ be allergic to food additives, such as Red Dye #4, a very common additive in Britain. So Mum began to buy everything ^fresh^, all from scratch, nothing pre-made. No canned goods, no pasta, nothing but things SHE made in her own kitchen. You need to understand that Joel, 4, had been kicked out of 3 pre-schools, could not go to anyone's house to play (but mine), was so badly behaved they didn't think he would be accepted in school. And his Mum was a nurse, and ^had^ to work. They were very desperate.
Within about 3 days of his diet change, the skin rash Joel had had was gone. He no longer ran around, bashing things into the walls (their house looked like a construction zone), and he had completely stopped hitting his Mum and sister, and trashing the house.
Come to find out (after doing some further testing) that he was horribly allergic to the most common food dye there is (and its in EVERYthing), and he'd been having a systemic reaction to it his entire life. She was HORRIFIED, as were we all, because you you're giving your kids a healthy diet. But every time that poor little boy ate something with that Red Dye #4 cooked or added to it, it was like poison to him.
I've never seen such a change in behavior in my life, and I don't know ^why^ he was so sensitive, but when they stopped him from consuming it, it really ^was^ like an actual miracle.
I don't know if you've tried this or not, but it's been 35 years, and I've never seen anything like it. I hope maybe this helps you and your family.
Best of luck.
The thing with the animals is so funny. I love how they both left before the mom came back to.
Definitely the right diagnosis for both families.. so pleased for them ❤
My child has moderate autism, but is still made to follow the rules like our other kids. The worst thing to do is reward their bad behaviour...autistic kids can be easier to discipline than neurotypical kids, because they typically have items/things they are fixated on that you can remove for negative behaviour.
I wouldn't trust the dog alone with that kid.
Exactly my thoughts!
I wouldnt trust my Child with any dog.
Deniz Adagulu ummm why ?
Wait, which kid?
Yeah that is NOT fair to that dog. If the mother is getting beat by her kid, imagine being a helpless animal that can't defend itself. Terrible.
Charlie is almost a mirror image of my 7 year old cousin with ODD and ADHD he can be so loving but absolutely anything can set him off and then hes violent, angry and destructive and it has nothing to do with the parenting my aunt is a wonderful parent with three boys each five years apart from the other but he alone makes up for two or three children on his own. If you punish him in any way he will get so angry he'll give himself nosebleeds just by screaming and he'll break things, throw things, hit his mother and older brother. And he's on medication. He acts entitled and its always everyone else's fault when he makes a mistake or doesn't ask for something someone else has and he wants, his vice cream melts because he left it in the sun? "MOM WHY DIDN'T YOU STOP MY ICE CREAM FROM MELTING!" and the tantrums last until he gets what he wants. He also blows up over video games and swears like a sailor hes already beaten three whole games, hes extremely addicted to the TV and he'll completely take it over from anyone and throw a fit if anyone trys to stop him, hes goes to bed wherever he passes out and it can be anywhere between 8:00 pm to 2:00 am school or not. He loses it getting ready for school in the morning he usually watches TH-cam when he gets ready and if he gets woken up too late for it then oh boy. And if you were to see him out on the street you would think hes an absolute angel, chubby, blonde hair, brown eyes, round cheeks. But when he loses it he can be the opposite of goes to show you can't always see disabilities like this.
Billy doesn't really seen naughty at all. Just a normal kid. He seems very sweet, articulate and smart. The mom is just doing things a bit wrong.
Of course you know everything right!
@@Fido-vm9zi Never claimed I did Karen. This comment is 4 years old. You seem triggered. 🤣🤣
I WISH BOTH FAMILIES NOTHING BUT HE ABSOLUTE BEST. THANK U FOR SHARING YOUR STORIES, IT ISN'T EASY, IT TAKES ALOT OF COURAGE TO LET PEOPLE INTO YOUR LIFE. NOT ONLY ARE U GETTING THE HELP YOU NEED, U ARE HELPING OTHERS AS WELL. HUGS FROM CANADA🇨🇦❤
🇬🇧💙 FROM ONE MUM TO ANOTHER U BOTH ROCK!! 😎👊
That so true sister amen to that!
@@tamannaruhiy930 Thanks Tammanna!! 😉❤🇨🇦
When Charlie throws tantrums he is smiling and laughing almost a if he knows the behavior is ridiculous but knows it will work to get his way.
Back To Source and Beyond he knows it’s working for his good. These mothers are the ones who should be evaluated for autism because these boys are smarter than them! They are playing everyone, even the Dr’s are dumb!!
Autism can make emotional responses inppropriate. So an autistic person may laugh when they are scared or upset, they may cry when happy, they may not show any emotion to something extreme or they may show extreme emotion to something thats not even worse mentioning. This is why autism is so misunderstood because people can’t understand why an autistic behaves a certain way so they explain it as something it isn’t inorder to make sense eg “that autistic woman is so dramatic” to describe an autistic woman who experiences empathy intensely so reacts emotionally to something in a more extreme way.
Exactly what I was thinking. When he was swinging at her as hard as he could he knew it was wrong and he also knew she would give up bc he’s so bad and she can’t keep on so just has to leave and remove herself from the situation and then he gets to keep playing his games and doing whatever HE wanted to do and not what his mom asked him to do.
He's admitted to knowing his actions cause pain .... that doesn't seem like he has any mental issues that can't be dealt with. He's just spoiled and knows how to get his way.
@@thesun-N-moon8885 this is a disgusting way to talk about a mother who continued to question professionals until she got a diagnosis and what the boy needs- therapy and strategies to cope. Have you ever worked with children that have had later diagnosis? this child has sensory issues, no concept of feelings or emotions, and needs to be taught appropriate social skills and reactions, and like all children, have not developed the part of their brain that helps them understand consequences for their actions. the mother is not a professionally trained therapist. The family will now get access to appropriate therapy. STOP bashing parents when you have no idea what they have gone through!
Kids are great but raising them is just the opposite
ahaha
The parents of the kid I nanny behaves like this with her parents but when she is with me she has zero issues. It's cuz the parents are all like please this please that. She knows I don't put up with the crap so she don't give me crap. These kids are fine in this video, they are just doing what they can get away with.
you should stay way from children
Yes, even kids with disabilities respond well to consistency and good parenting!
Billy and is uncle are def two peas in a pod like his mom said! I think it’s really cool to see how close they are and how good of a mom Billy has. She already has no much experience with her brother and is doing a great job with her son now. Okay now the other kid Charlie I think, when he was swinging at his mom I was getting extremely angry. One he is way to big and also from the way it looks he knows it’s wrong and doesn’t care, he’s doing it bc he knows he can get his way by acting that way. I know his mom is probably stressed 24/7 and I feel so bad for her. I couldn’t imagine honestly.
Parents must remember, he's not the messiah he's just a very naughty boy.
To any single parents out there, perhaps like me, through divorce for very serious reasons, please don't read these many derogatory comments about single parents and feel disheartened. I for one, am confident in my unwavering ability to raise a happy, loved and well adjusted child. My child and I, just the two of us have a very full life. Life is far from black and white, and the sad truth is, it's often safer for some children to be with one parent. Please just take a moment to think about the impact of your words before typing.
You are the rare gem.Most single parents I know do not parent. They are simply exhausted from working full time, running the house, etc.
I love how nonchalant the kid is about his bad behavior
I wish parents would stop throwing around terms such as ADHD and Autism. It honestly shows their lack of understanding when comes to especially Autism. It's not a convenient excuse. A child with Autism faces a very tough and even traumatizing childhood. But adulthood is even harder. Socializing is such an important part of everyday life. It how you get along with colleagues, how you meet the person you will marry one day, it's how you land a job.
People with Autism find this so so hard and will likely need additional care for the rest of their lives depending on where they are on the spectrum.
It's not an excuse for a lack of discipline in a child because parents won't say no or lay down rules and boundaries in their homes, because they are afraid their child will reject them when in fact they will thank them when they are older. No one said being a parent is easy.
My angry toddler
They are not toddlers
You don’t ask children what to do, you tell them what to do. The golden parenting tip that no clueless parent seems to grasp
Or you give them VERY narrow options to choose for themselves.
Where is dad????
Guess it's easier for dads to bail
Does it matter. Mum's can do it on their own 👏👏
All men do is pay child support to the women they impregnate because they’re forced to by law. They always get to escape responsibility and leave the heavy load on moms.
"it's not nice"
"oh dear"
that was honestly so funny!
@@AndyPMusic well it certainly get's peoples attention on that matter ^^
With Charlie's mum, you can see the mixed relief and anxiety when she was told.
Poor kids. Billy with getting very little sleep must be really hard for him and his mum. I get very ratty with less sleep than I need. Charlie makes me think of my fiancé and just how hard it must have been for him as a child, and nobody quite understanding why things aren't quite working out.
Billy and Charlie are beautiful kids. My son has adhd and it's not easy . My heart goes out to all these families. Their fathers might not be around but those are some warrior moms
I'm a mum of two twins There both 10 and the both have adhd ,autism and dyslexia
There lovely boys it makes me so sad nethier of them have friends They both have said that they try to be good but they can't
Both boys are very intelligent. Billy is a sweetheart. Charlie is too. I hope they both go on to have happy and productive lives.
I don't think the same to Charlie.
Sorry but not sorry
@@Mikichan85 He is sweet. He loves his mom, he says so and displays it. It's just the pressure he is under, that with him being autistic just makes him explode. He can't control that and that needs to be tackled, of course. But it doesn't change who he is in his heart.
Someone who beats his mother is the opposite of a sweetheart.
Loved this fascinating and really well made documentary
I've been seeing therapists for decades and not improving until the last six months. All these years the therapists thought that I was lying to them because of my lack of eye contact and inability to properly respond to what they were saying. Several became quite abusive (thinking that I was purposefully agitating them) but I could not respond to that either. Work, school, and family life were always problematic. Finally, I had a young therapist schooled in the latest methods who finally listened to me and realized that I had a deadly social phobia. That, and the fact that I, discovered that I totally fit the profile for high-functioning autism not only explains my past problems, but also opens up answers to many things which happened to me.
Whether these kids are on the spectrum or not they are not being properly disciplined they know exactly how to get their mom's to break down and give in they know what they are doing
I didn't find out that my children are most likely on the autism spectrum until they were in their 40s. Much to late for intervention and change. Hurts my heart.
I wish Dawn was my GP, she is wonderful and a good example of what GPs should be like, but sadly most don't give you time of day. 👍
Stupid parents self-diagnosing their kids bad behavior. My son actually had ADHD, now ADD as he is now an adult, and he never acted out like that. He danced at dinner time when he was eating, but if that was he how he was going to eat, I let him dance. My boy could put down an adult plate of food, and not leave the table until he got a fruit cup, his dessert. He was super thin, burned a lot of energy, but he slept thru the night. You want to avoid these spoiled kids? STOP GIVING THEM ALL THAT CANDY! That contributes to their hyperactivity.
where are the fathers
Exactly
Where they usually are...hiding.
Absent as is common
Metube gone to get milk
Thank you thank you thank you for asking
Please detox from the video games and get rid of the multi colored cereal
Cynthia S hahaha 😂
Cynthia S No sugar or caffeine
Spell correctly and they might consider you intelligent enough to take your advice
@@hannahcollings6358 Haha :)
Yeah give these kids to my mum for like 2 weeks they’ll come back like saints.
😂😂😂😂😂
Lolllllll funny
This is a tricky issue. I work with special needs, most of these kids just come from either very privileged families or either families with very little income. What i see is 95% of the time bad parenting is the true culprit! Parents are lazy or have spoiled their kids rotten. This one kid that comes from a wealty family has absolutely no respect for his teachers. Hes on the aspergers spectrum.His current teacher tries so hard to get him to cooperate but refuses to do work. He will run circles in the classroom while the class is in the middle of a lesson. I understand that aspers can hinder social inteaction, but in his case hes just a bratt that has been pampered in every which way and has no consequences. He gets to draw and doodle while his classmates are actually doing work. I hope he goes to a Jr.High that can accomadate to him.
UnicornsandUfos I actually did kind of act like that when I was in elementary school... and I came from a middle class family. ☹️
I think you need to find another job IMMEDIATELY! You seem to have such disdain for these children, I bet they can tell you don't like them. PLEASE find work elsewhere these children don't need your negative energy.
@@jcoleman4769 The truth hurts. Poor parenting, often with one parent, is at the root of the problem.
What a great story! Very educational THANK YOU
Oh that's such a shame that Charlie's grandad has died since, they seemed really close. I hope it didn't affect how he's progressing :(
Looks like lazy ineffective parenting to me.
I'm not sure why this isn't mentioned earlier for Charlie, but I thought it was very clear from the first few clips of him that he exhibited unusual impulsion as well as characteristics that align with oppositional defiance disorder. I say he's impulsive, because he doesn't seem to think through on the consequences. He doesn't seem to know how his action will result in a consequence, and he acts in the present moment. This was clearly seen when he was giving the "tour" of his grandparent's house, falling over the bed and onto the box of toys...and when he drinks a glass of liquid spilling it over himself.
Such a beautiful gift you gave these families/ children. ❤️👍🏻
I believe that having dad in the picture could possibly be a positive impact in these boy's lives🤷♀️
Wow Robyn doesn't look like 21 at all, I think Billy is very stressful to keep in control 🙄
I really appreciate those families/mums!
Television, Computer off! Better, out of the house! I guarantee that helps. Get them outside. Out into the woods.
And hey, if Billy does not want his breakfast, so what?? He won‘t starve.
And if the 8 year old does not want to go out? Make him. As a parent you are the boss, not the child. My children are not allowed to hit me, any other kids or anything. Toys that get thrown around will be taken away.
My oldest has autism, she is ten, she needs rules, strict rules! Otherwise she can‘t cope. Simple as that.
thanks Dr.Karen for the advices they sure work on every child u smart head .
well karen, your children will grow up to be rebels who can easily ignore you like you never even existed
im just saying. this could be abuse for them. even tho they seem simple its not that easy
That won't work every day, so you need to add indoor play ideas for the rainstorm and such days.
So lovely to see the changes in the children with some directed intervention. Good work Mum's and professionals!
First of all, thank you for really interesting life stories. And thank you for opportunity of listening "British" english. Sometimes its really difficult to understand because of the accent, but its sounds amazing. (Hallo from Russia with boring american speaking 😁)
My 16 years old son is enough to see my eyes to understand that he should not continue what he is doing. If i call him with his full name, he knows, that he will have real troubles. I cant understand parents who think that children should rule the world. Its a way to big problems for everyone.
My husband could snap like that - until we dumped wheat. Now he’s a different man. Made such a difference. We walked on eggshells for years. Not any more. It’s wonderful. I’m sure many kids are affected by the food they eat. So much of it is stripped of nutrients, refined, processed, denatured in many ways, depriving us of vital nutrients.
I think Charlie the second child has got PDA. My daughter has it and he reminds me of the way she is
Great call, I've never heard of PDA before today.
I've heard of this, but what exactly is PDA? I can't find it on the internet, maybe I google wrong. :D
I should add, I haven't watched the documentary yet, I know they'll explain it in the video, I'm sorry, duh.
Dexter Desmond Quentin pathological demand avoidance
@@linneamariequentin8216 wait till you do see it. It is so obvious that the child has problems. My heart breaks for his mother.
My son was like that only it was episodic. Spanking did no good. It just made the behaviors worse. Saying “no” was catastrophic. He was ADHD. I didn’t do meds bc I was afraid it would stunt his growth. I should have done meds. We all survived. He has a Ph D in Engineering and runs a steel mill on Or.
I'm 64. When I was a kid there were autistic, developmentally challenged, and a lot of other disabilities. But I never saw kids totally out of control like todays kids. Too many excuses. Parents not stopping what they are doing when the need arises and correcting their children firmly not in an abusive way. I had so many teachers ask me what the secret is to my well behaved kids. I said prayer & lots of time when they are small so you can enjoy them a lot more in the coming years.
Billy is so cute... just adorable and his mother is so nice 👍
Where are the dads?
Exactly
Jayne Eyre why does it seem like you are blaming the mother? if the mums didn’t look after the kids I highly doubt the fathers would
My son's father took off , that's ok because I have more than enough love for him ,and I get to see all his great accomplishments and have the honor of saying I have the best kid in the world ., And he knows who was there for him and who wasn't. Damn sure not his father
Making children they don't want to raise
Melissa Meyers - God bless you and your son! You are a very strong woman! My father took off when I was only a baby. Soon after my parents divorced. Despite my mother’s efforts, he never gave me a cent (third world laws suck big time!). However, I was lucky to be raised by my mother and grandmother. I can assure they were everything but soft. They were strict and gave me a good education. Now I am a grownup, far from perfect, but I try to do my best every day. I support my mother and love her flaws and all. As to my father, he tried to make contact last year. Too bad I’m too old to even care.
Schedules and consistent discipline are so important for little ones. My older son is 5 my younger son just turned 2. They sleep like they’re supposed to if they don’t want to sleep they just lie in bed until they fall asleep. Talk to you kids they have feelings and you need to help them or they get anger issues.
This was us: me: off to bed you 2.
Them : not tired
Me: you don’t have to sleep but you do have to go to bed.
They’d be fast asleep within a few minutes 😂
The parents NEED patentintrång SKILLS!!!!
Not in my household. You’ll be damned if u think your guna put your hands on me. I don’t care what age u are. Or who you are.
Nah man.... even as a teacher if a kid has a melt down and tries to cry to get out of something or manipulate the teachers I just tell them “keep crying it’s not getting you anywhere”. Feel like I’ll do that as a mom as well hahah. Wouldn’t say I’ll beat my kid... but my parents also were the “if you cry I’ll give you something to cry about” parents and that scared the hell outta me.
Amanda Hudson I’m sure you will, you may have higher expectations of your own children than your students.
Disorders aside, kids live up to our expectations, if we expect very little we’ll get nothing.
My son learned very young which behaviors got him nowhere.
Yup. These kids learn that bad behaviour makes their mother give in.
WODDEN SPOON
I’m of the mind that PDA is sailing close to the wind of “Not doing as your told because your spoilt and completely in control of your parent” ..
I really don’t understand why Charlie was present when they were discussing the game playing management of his condition !!
Actually, the question Charlie got under the asessment on what makes him happy or cheerful to which he responded "I don't know" I think would be good for a lot of grown ups to think about as well. I bet a lot of people really don't know, but rather goes with the flow of other's ideas of fun and happiness.
So true!