When I joined the military, I was astounded at the number of guys that didn’t know how to do anything. They couldn’t work with tools, didn’t know anything about cars, couldn’t cook, clean, balance a checkbook the list goes on. I had to ask one of them why they didn’t know how to do anything. The answer I got was: “I didn’t have anyone to teach me.” So, I think a big part of being a good man, is teaching young men how to do stuff and how to live and work in society.
I’m a young black male from the south. That’s relevant only because I’ve grown up in a very different generation, with very different experiences and exposures, with likely very different politics from Dwayne. Yet I find so much incredible benefit in listening to him teach me about what really matters beneath all those superficial layers & labels we use to divide ourselves in society, and use his advice to work on becoming the man I hope to be. If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my few years, it’s that when a man of sage wisdom is willing to impart it …You shut up. Listen carefully. Say thank you. Then go do it. Thank you, sir.
We come from different places, but respect, self control, patience, open mindedness, these are all things we have to pursue. I consider that man a brother who pursues those things. So come on bro, let’s be men and change the world for the better huh?
5 essential tips to be a proper man; 1. Be a good man (care for others) 2. Be dangerous (protect the family) 3. Be educated (read & experience) 4. Be calm (walk away from noise) 5. Be wise (apply what you know)
@@JackNapierRisus Patience takes practice. Take time to yourself to reflect and you will become more self aware of your actions in the present from that reflection
@@JackNapierRisus What helped me was to challenge my own perspective. I used to battle with a lot of road rage - constantly snapping on others that didn't drive what I thought was "the right way". Now, I'm terrible at arithmetic. I struggle with remembering numbers - which is kinda key to the whole thing... So I started imagining those folks on the road screaming at me while I try to do math. It became a point on the horizon I could look to for calm. Sounds strange, but this applied to so many different paths in my life.
the way i look at it most people today aren't good at all. its kinda like all you wouldn't think of an older person as being stupid for not knowing how to use an iPhone. it was never taught to them they didnt grow up with it and it came around when they were past their prime. you don't consider a young person smart for knowing how to use iPhone because they grew up with it its all they know. same with morals, they were taught this ultra moralistic view of the world and they've never known anything else. they assume they are good people because they are just inherently good, the reality is they would be whoever they were raised to be, if they were born in Nazi Germany they most likely woulda been a Nazi. if born in the American south at the right time most of them wouldn't have thought twice about owning slaves. this is true of almost every person, but it seems so many people refuse to accept this reality. this is why stuff like moral philosophy or religion or spiritualism or family values or just anything that grounds you morally is so essential, without it we can stray so far from being anything resembling "good".
"If you like to read, you will never be Lonely" I am 72 yr old Senior male and this is great advice heck I am learning a few things myself here Nice work:)
ROGER!! Those 2 sentences got mustard, what's a great book of any genre that you've read that stuck with you.... "The Secret" the mind power i learned from that book at the time i learned it may have changed my life more than just an extra book on a shelf. ROGER FOR PREZ!!!!!
For all of the know-it-all’s out there that are so blasted worried about the barn, I moved inside the door of that barn to get out of the rain. It had been raining for hours and the wind has been blowing in, the hay was soaking wet. Give a guy a little bit of credit. I know a thing or two because I’ve seen a thing or two.
@ Dry Creek Wrangler School what do you care what they say? You know what's goin on'. Ignore em'. That's what me ma always told me. Actually she said, "Fuck 'em." :D
taking the time to educate the ignorant, or hopeless know-it-alls, they listen but they don't hear. Just be calm and silent. Be silent 90% and only ask questions 10% of the time this is the 90-10 rule it would be good of your watchers to practice this and watch there lives change before there very eyes.
I damn near cried while watching this at work. I’m a young black male from the north east and yet your videos touch me and push me. Today I make a big change because when I leave this world I must leave a mark and big hole. Thank you, I gotta go to dry creek wrangler school one day!
@The Don I am also a black man who stumbled across his videos and it has been a life changer man. Seriously. We need more individuals like him but just hang in there and apply what he says... (Easier said than done) and it will be all worthwhile. Good luck to you on your journey to self improvement/betterment
Bro I’m also a black man an growing up in the city of Detroit this video is exactly the type of man I’d love to Learn from , be mentored by at this point in my life I wanna live long an comfortable.
Nothing that he teaches is about being white. This is about looking at things for what they are and not for what they want you to see... that and being tolerant of those differences in a way that is beneficial to you as an individual. It's doing what's right for all involved and that encompasses both the left and right way of viewing the same issues.
Every blue moon, the youtube algorithm gifts you something amazing. This resonates so much with me. Im only 32 but Ive been a piece of work from 13 years old onward, but I never did give up on being a better man throughout. However I do look back and wonder if the person who did all the atrocious things I did in the past was even me at times. Its funny how our brains change with age.
reality is only but a moment in time, our lives doesn't have to be the mirror reflection of who or what we imagine ourselves to be but rather a construct of happenings that shaped us to be the hammer at the end of it all.
I have a friend named Logan that is like this. and just working with him has made me look to him as an example and I have consciously changed for the better. His kindness threw a wrench in my nihilism and cynicism. He's one of the highest quality people I know
That's beautiful man, may you continue to propser for your own greater good and those around you, god bless you and your friend logan! Hope all is well with you :)
Advice for young men (and not so young men): “We must all suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. The difference is discipline weighs ounces while regret weighs tons.”
I am so tired of this one-size-fits-all advice. Mostly because it BS. You know better than to parrot what you read on facebook. Find some books. Read them. Sigh.
@@h0ph1p13 It's one size fits all for a reason, because quotes like these are useful. They're true for many. Regrets are far more painful to me, than being disciplined has. I have many regrets and they're haunting. I never regret being disciplined afterwards. I feel the pain of being disciplined when, say, I go for a run. I hate running. But I do it because I know the downstream effects of laziness are far more painful.
"A wise man speaks because he has something to say, a fool, because he has to say something." - Plato One of my dad's favorite sayings was, "If you tell everything you know, everyone knows what you know and what they know." Enjoy your videos. Keep up the good work.
@@sadhu7191 how is this sad? Yes, the intro sucks, but is the knowledge he’s passing on not beneficial? This is pure tons of Gold for those that are 2 feet from Gold and seeking it? Willing to persevere! “What’s your mission?”
0:00 Mornin 1:16 Anything you’d like to know? 1:42 The Cigar 3:46 Lots of Lost Young Men 4:20 5 Things 4:39 #1 Work on bein a Good Man • + - and neutral Being Good is Proactive Doing something Not extreme, just care about people “How you doin today?” “You alright? Anything I can do to help?” 8:17 #2 Be A Dangerous Man He was with The Sheep 🐶 🐑 🐑 🐑 Doing Good Protecting Those Around Us 11:21 “I am not a danger to those around me.” 12:58 #3 Be Educated Work your muscle Keep learning Better better better Read and improve 14:50 Be Calm “This is not the Me that used to be.” Turn the things off that destroy your calm. 17:08 Quit the jacked up sugar 18:50 Go into your conflict calm 19:37 Wisdom and Knowledge You don’t have to tell other people everything you know 21:37 Pretend to be that man 22:17 Sit down and figure out what kinda man do you want to be? 22:44 We need Good Effective Men. “We have enough neutrals” Would you leave a hole? Leave a big hole when you leave this world.
I must have replayed Wayne saying “be calm… be calm..” about 10 times. I have problems with reacting instead of being calm. And Wayne saying it the way he does felt like a warm blanket of reassurance over my tendency to react. Wayne, thank you.. now I’m gonna go listen to it 10 more times.
I'm a British guy but everything this guy says is true. Don't watch the news, look after your family and friends and stand up for what's right. I smiled through this whole chat from a man who has learned wisdom.
So...just keep our heads down and out of the government's way, and whatever you think you know, you don't know? lol do remoaners count as british? i'm not sure about that one buddy.
@@Suiseisexy He's saying it's not worth getting upset about the news, because it's all a stage and they're gonna do their b.s. anyway, not to keep your head down and let the govt do whatever it wants.
This is what Americans stand for. Sadly, which you touched on, the news paints us poorly. All we want is to just do to others as we would want. Be kind, be good.
Another great chat. Reminds me of my husband. He was quiet ,easy going and hilariously deceptive with a slow southern drawl. He used to say “people just think I’m stupid because I talk funny. That’s fine” He could discuss anything with anybody on their own level. Look out if a person had bad intentions toward our kids or me. They would never see it coming. Miss him everyday.
Wishing you the best; so sorry for you loss. Sounds like a great man. I'm a kinda young, 31, looking for my wife and can only pray that person would miss me when I leave this earth. What yall have is special, and I hope you know he's looking down on you each and every second of every day.
I been off social media for about 4 months, saving ALL my money, and been focused on training, WORKING, and taking care of my lady, and my daughter. Thank you for helping us with stay on this traditional path, and keeping us grounded. Continue to live with honor fellas!! ✊🏾
@Autumn Doe the big social media sites are a threat to society if you ask me. TH-cam is a little different in that it's more about watching long form stuff, the "social" aspect ie comments are just a secondary aspect. On twitter the echo chamber and "discussion" aspects are way more emphasized. More harm than good.
As a 22 year old, It’s challenging for me to understand and act as a proper man. I grew up with only my mother and three older sisters. My father was there until the age of 7 and I feel as though I have never really learned how to act like a man with his absence. I figured out a little bit about being a proper kind of person, but not a proper kind of man. You’re videos help me out very much in understanding what it means to be a man and shape an ideal of how I want to be, something that was left out for me while growing up. Thank you.
Dewayne, This is absolutely my favorite video that you’ve made. I’m a young man that’s looking to separate myself from the rest of my generation by embracing more traditional values, work ethic, and mindset. This, along with so much of your other advice has helped me greatly in doing so. Just wanted to say thank you for that!
get married to a GOOD woman and start having children in your 20s. it will keep you focused on the right things in life. Go to a Christian church and find that woman.
ROMAN CARLISLE: I am a woman, and have been married to the same fellow for 51 years and he always tells anyone who asks, how we made it work. He tells them that you must Communicate to each other. Find you a woman who thinks like you think. Discuss everything always. Hubby and I married after dating for only 6 weeks, and no we didn't know each other before that either, we did live in the same small community but didn't know each other. In that 6 weeks we talked about what our marriage was going to be like, I wasn't going to volunteer each other to do things, for each others parent. That causes a lot of discourse. But the best thing you can do in any relationship, talk about what you expect, and what you want from that relationship. TALK to that person who you are interested in, watch how she acts and reacts to life in general. Good Luck Sir!!!! I pray you find someone who will be a good fit for you, as we, hubby and I did.
I am in the same shoes as you brother, take it one step at a time, you'll get there. I'm 24. My biggest conflict currently is my health, I got EoE, can't eat much food and that means I can't maintain my weight very well. Money is tight, and stress is overwhelming to the point my teeth starting to fall apart. But, I know if I take action and work on myself and my mindset, things can and will get better. In December of 2020, I was homeless. Today, I'm on my own, making ends meet with a nice job. One hurdle done, but many more to go. Never give up.
Every time I watch one of your videos, it feels like it’s my dad giving some of his wisdom. I’m extremely grateful to have stumbled onto your channel, the world needs more men like you.
Im 18 years old and came across this video a cuple of weeks ago. My life has made a major turn since watching this video, and applying it to my life. For that I want to say, thank you sir.
Asking someone "is there anything I can do to help" is really important. People love to ask "What's wrong" if you see someone blue, but the issue is, chances are that person has no clue what's wrong and you just made everything worse. Just asking if there's anything they need help with or anything they'd like to talk about is important. We need to look after each other, especially our young men. Not a lot of them have father figures or people that care, be the person who does care!
Yes. Great content here. Close your eyes and Imagine being the Sheep Dog. Quiet, dangerous powerful and ready. Great advice. The Jodan Peterson video is here : th-cam.com/video/qwaLhSgi7q8/w-d-xo.html (also a great video).
Sir, I can’t thank y’all enough for this video. I shared this video with my stepson and soon enough the entire family was listening. I’m blessed to have 3 daughters and a stepson. I’m cursed to raise them in a world infinitely more complicated then it was 40 years ago when I was a kid. Content, and people like yourself, are harder and harder to come by. Thank you very much.
Some of the most level-headed people I know were hotheads in their younger years. It took me years of hard knocks and heartache to reach calm. I am 47 years old and still seeking self improvement. You inspire me to keep trying. Thanks!
Being a hot head and having a short temper exposes one to the hard knocks of life, hard lessons are very impressionable and humbling on ones psyche....Plus as men we are just running on higher testosterone in our younger years, I reflect on the fights I got into when I was younger, and sometimes it was just ego and me trying to prove myself to myself, now I see it all differently, I have since learned how handle myself in a physical altercation, and now I take more pride and self satisfaction in identifying the situation and avoiding it before it gets physical, or the ability to deescalate the situation so it doesn't get physical.
To all those men and women who had a loving and present dad, grandpa, or any positive male role model in their lives, you are the richest people in the world. I would have given everything to have had my dad. I will share your videos with anyone who needs fatherly advice including my boys. To all the wonderful dads out there, thank you for caring about your children. Fathers are so important! Thank you sir for your videos. God bless us all 🙏🏼
I’m a woman, but many of these points hit home, especially the importance of calmness. Got my lesson from a SCUBA instructor many years back. “Calm people live” she said. I’ll never forget that
Savannah, not surprised you feel that way because I think these are human virtues he’s talking about. A lot of lads don’t have any of it these days and a few of these things, boys are being taught are bad attributes - IF you’re a boy. They don’t know what they’re supposed to be. It’s easier to just check out.
My karate sensei taught me the importance of being calm, especially in a fight. Do not give into anger and do not give in to fear. I think his exact words that he said to my class were "As long as you can think, you are always armed and you are always dangerous."
@ 00:51 I love to see how much your Channel has grown in just a year, and I appreciate all the wisdom you have shared with all of us. Thank you Dwayne!
Generally speaking, as a man about your age, who enjoys his 5 children and 8 grandchildren, an occasional cigar, and the outdoors, I would like to say thank you. Your philosophy is much like mine and I enjoy hearing you talk about things that matter in addition to the interest your viewers have in wrangling. As for showing Momma on the channel, talk about the parenting philosophy that guided you as you raised your children and how you all interact with your adult children. Also, have a conversation about how you make your marriage successful.
you remind me a lot of my grandad and ive started listening to your stuff atleast once a day. its been helping me tremendously and its a great comfort to me. thank you for what you do !
As I read through comments, I am impressed with the young men that are endeavoring to improve not only their self-awareness of what they want to achieve in life, but are actively pursuing these notions. My husband of 42 years just said the other day that the younger people working with him asked how he did it, married early, stayed married, raised children, etc. Keep up the good work dear Sir.
Thank you. I woke up to what you're talking about around 27, really been working hard on it. There's been stumbles and regressions, and I'm not where I want to be yet, but I am working on it. Jordan and Jocko helped me get to this point, now I've just discovered you and you describe your earlier version of yourself. I used to be a coward and a door mat. And I counted my good deeds and said they were higher than my misdeeds and mistakes. After years of struggle and personal emergencies, I've learned the value of the things you say in your videos. And you validate my internal values that I was straying from. Thank you. I'm on the journey.
Possitive male guidance is something our culture needs today. There are so many young people out there who have never had anyone. Thats why its so easy for the predators to grow a large audience of people to indoctrinate and drain. Its not just money they drain, its your mental health and life energy too. Thank you sir for your videos. For the people who feel lost, never give up. Find men who you can learn from be it literate, in life or online. If they are selling you something seriously consider there motives. If its always negative with no way to better yourself or situation ask if this is a person who should be a leader or teacher. Thank you all and God bless
Your right on the point of Not Enough Male Guidance. With so many issues people have with themselves,. The children fall thru the cracks. (women too) with Soo much separation of families, The people of other cultures, tribes and such, know it takes a village...✌️💗
@@chettjr1140 Agreed, makes me think of a Mama Grizzly protecting her cub. Being a chameleon is an underrated skill. Blending in, avoiding conflicts, and making quick decisions. Because if I run into someone with nothing to lose, I'd just humble myself and take a superficial defeat knowing my life is intact.
my dad wasn't one of those. He was a miserable msnbc type dads who wanted to look like the good guy without really doing anything in the big scale. Strong men create good times. Good times create weak men. Weak men create bad times. Bad times are what's aheed of us right now I'm affraid.
12:48 I don't think I've ever heard someone say this, but this is exactly how I feel. I'm not the person I need to be to be worthy of having a good woman who loves me and a family that depends on me. It would be wrong for me to go after things I'm not prepared to support and defend, even if I want them more than my next breath.
Dude, that's a brutally honest thing to realise and admit - not an easy thing to do. Most blokes I've known in your situation play the victim. Most won't even admit this to themselves.
Self honesty is part of the list for sure. I grew up thinking I didn’t want a family because the world sucks. Now I do want a family but I’m honest with myself I’m not ready in many ways and it sucks. We were all scammed in the education system dumbing us down about the reality of life.
Single father of three here Just got out of the army a few years back and with my new sales job im learning these principles along with other basic life skills I am Thankful for this popping up on my feed this morning God bless you
My 70 year old boss when I was working my first job at 13. “It’s better to sit there and let everyone think you’re a fool than open up your mouth and prove it to them.” Never forgot that pearl of wisdom.
@@MrFredstt Mine too. He put it, "Better to hold your tongue and be thought a fool than to open your mouth & remove all doubt." I posted this before I saw Steve Wright's post. Great minds think alike?😞
Hey Reid, I’m sorry to hear that man. I haven’t experienced a loss quite like that but I did grow up without a solid father figure, so in some sense I can relate to that hole just left there. Time bestows venerability, they say. In times where we lack guidance or wish to be a real man’s man, I find peace in knowing it takes time. And since I can’t do anything to hurry along time, all we can do now is be patient. Naturally then, life and God’s gracious hand will form us into the man we’re supposed to be
Sorry for your loss. Your grandfather was in your shoes. He probably had a role model who he admired and followed. Do the same. Use the lessons he taught to be the man he was or more. Nothing is stopping you. Most men have the excuse of never seeing what it looks like. You have the example. Follow it. Best of luck. God bless.
I recently lost my dad in November and found a lot of comfort in someone very similar as the man he was. Love the wisdom. Please do more videos covering life’s journey as a man! Keep it up
1. Goodness 2. Dangerousness 3. Education 4. Calmness 5. Wisdom I love how all of these can be developed no matter who you are or where you live. Truth rings true whether you live in downtown New York or a deep Holler in Kentucky! I love everything about this!
@Palhaço Triste dont be so bitter. There's a lot a woman can take away from this video as well. Try to appraciate likeminded people, regardless of their gender, and grow alongside them. Instead of looking for enemies everywhere you go
So much wisdom right there!! Life is very much like being on a sailboat. You can either let the wind blow you this way and that, or you can take hold of the tiller and sail to your destination. Don't let the wind dictate where life takes you. Set sail and use that wind to get you to your destination.
This is one of those rare times when TH-cam recommends a new type of video, that actually resonates with me. I'm 38, but have never felt like I've grown into a full father figure and have instead been toeing the line between being a stupid young man, and Red Foreman (Which is what my wife has started calling me, and it fits). The thoughts in the video have opened my eyes to the fact I'm stuck with with the negative parts of youth, and the negative parts of maturity without that good stuff in the middle. I'm going to do some self evaluation and find a place to implement these "Rules" into my daily life. Thank you for the great insight!
Man, I love this. In a period in time where most men are influenced by social media men trying to tell them how to be, there’s this dude sitting out there on some chair out by his stable telling you authentic truths about manhood. This is what I aspire to be more than some unnecessarily aggressive and cocky hustler. Honestly. Good stuff.
As a country guy around your age who is often asked by younger men how to be mor successful in life. I give them 2 pieces of advice. 1. Don't be so quick to marry, as love is blind. Listen to older men that you respect that are on the outside looking in. 2. Limit your debt. Period. Then find a frugal woman who is willing to work and wait for the rewards.
Cody Way: After 48 years of marriage to one woman(by the grace of God), I would say, look for and marry as smart & wise a woman as you can find who will put up with you. To that end, make yourself as tolerable as you possibly can. And overall, get to know God. No matter what you are able to accomplish by your sheer will, it will amount to nothing in the end if you reject Him. Make no mistake, the war on common sense and decency that is going on today is directed at the person of God & His image reflected in His creation, particularly mankind. Most of those involved in the attack against God don't understand that's what they're doing the unseen forces driving them surely do!
you're unfamiliar with the modern problems young men have to deal with. you're telling them to look for a frugal woman meanwhile most of the women their age are busy taking pictures of their ass to post on instagram and sleeping with strangers from tinder. how are they going to limit their debt when it costs 160k to for a 4 year degree that's required by most adult jobs. and you need a 30 year mortgage for an average house. sorry pops it's a different world than the one you grew up in.
My wife of 30 yrs was brilliant and fierce. She died from premature dementia. She was frugal and supportive 100%. I learned so much from her. BTW, she treasured that I was dangerous
From 18:30 on, it reminded me of what the noble Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said. When a man came to him asking for the best advice, the Prophet ﷺ responded “do not become angry” and repeated it three times. Thank you for your talk Dewayne.
This video is exactly what I needed, I’ve been going through an extremely rough patch in my life and this video and talk is something that reminded me of my father that I lost 3 years ago. I haven’t heard a talk like this in some time… thank you.
When I was born 20 years ago, my father and mother separated, I was raised by my grandparents from my fathers side, they are the only people I genuinely love... My grandfather played the biggest part in raising me at a young age, he built my character and my intelligence, nowadays my grandmother is playing the biggest part in raising me, she helps me build my emotional intelligence and guides me through relationships. I used to hate my parents for not raising me, because I know that's not how it's supposed to be, that's not a "normal" family, a "normal" life, but really, I am blessed to have my grandparents raise me, I have a clear idea of what kind of man I want to become, my grandfather, and what kind of man I don't want to become, my father. As I sat down to watch your video sir, I saw my grandfather's wisdom in you, I must thank you for putting your wisdom out there, wishing you and your loved ones the best.
I rarely comment on videos but as a 25 year old father with 3 kids, working an industrial maintenance gig in a grease pit, I've never had something, someone said, resonate more. The honesty, openness, and guidance is priceless and I plan to share this with as many men, who may need, as I can. These past few years have been a battle for most young men to find themselves and their ideologies, and people like Peterson,Jocko,Rogan,Goggins, and now you, have been a blessing for us all to help lighten the paths that need it. I know there are many more figures I didn't mention, but I hope with time all those in this battle of straightening out America's morals are properly recognized.
My husband was 25 w our 2 kids (at the time), I was older. Know that those boots on the ground and loyalty pay WAY off. Just keep your eyes on the prize: doing something your fellow fathers won’t. Keep strong papa. It’s get good like a fine wine. Follow Christ and be good to mama. You’ll both go thru growth times that have to have adjustments by the other person. But eye on the prize brother. And keep it up! 💪💪💪
Holly fuckin shit breh, you're making me feel like a pussy out here. God bless you and your kids, you just keep your eyes on the tiger and give your children the guidance they so desperately need in these times.
I have to say thank you Dwayne, this and your other videos has helped me so much in the last month or so. I’m a young adult myself 22, trying to get out this mindset most people are in nowadays where we feel lost, unheard and think we should have it all figured out. My mom sheltered me a lot growing without a father and I know it’s because she love me so much but I now see it has handicapped me for the real world so I’m trying to be a man of my own, that’s why this is so important to me. You and many others you named in this video has helped me and others tremendously with your wisdom. For the rest of us young adults we are truly blessed and lucky to even have access to videos and people like Dwayne because if we practice these ways starting at the age we are now especially we’ll be unstoppable. Love you all
@@mrlancaster7997 For self development? Mediations from Marcus Aurelius I also suggest regularly taking time to think about yourself and how you act with friends/family. Are you being yourself, are you taking decisions with your heart or just to please others and are you kind to the people around you? Make sure to not lose yourself growing up. This is most important.
@@mrlancaster7997 workout, meditate, be good to people, build a manly strengh not to abuse those who are weaker, but to protect them. Be proud of yourself and know that being a real man is a virtue and not every boy finds that virtue in their lives.
@deazylife8815 The ability to do harm is the only way it is possible to show restraint. If a man is incapable of doing harm, he can only be obedient, not good.
What you’re doing brother is very important & needed these days . I’m 28, I have a 2 yr old son. my first child(his momma ain’t around). I was raised by my mother & grandmother around drugs ,violence, negativity etc. Being a father is intimidating of course but even more so when you didn’t have any examples on how to be one . I just moved from where I was born & raised to get a new chance at life,for my boy . Your videos bring me motivation & hope , a lot of it .. I was at a crossroads in my life when I found your YT channel. It certainly helped me make the jump to try an change myself & become someone I’m comfortable with my son looking up to.. Please continue with these as long as possible , what your doing is greatly appreciated & NEEDED . God bless you , your journey & all your loved ones sir. Thankyou ✌🏼
I deleted all my subscriptions to my political channels, and replaced them with channels like these. I have never been happier not that I’m blind to other things just opening my life to always learning more and more . ☕️ 👍🏻
Pretty much did the same. Unsbbed all the "outrage" channels and whenever a news style video pops i click "Do not recommend". It's basically trying to find wholesome content.. and religions/Christian content. A few Vloggers of Village/Dacha life style in Russia and Ukraine
Man I did the same thing. You may already know about him, but check out Donnie Laws channel. He does stories about Appalachian history, trail cams, metal detecting and even ghost stories.
8 months later and you're at 600k and climbing. Your words and wisdom resonate with so many! Congrats and many wishes on your continued success with the channel and your school.
I love what my family has told me ever since I was little. You have two ears and one mouth, which means you should listen twice as much as you should talk. I love the saying and once I got older and had a little life experience behind it made so much sense. Mr. Dewayne thank you for this video keep it and good job.
Thank you for making these videos. I grew up in a very dysfunctional family. My father was emotionally absent, and when he wasn't, he was explosive and angry. I suffered a lot of trauma growing up and I ended up with life-long mental health issues. I'm 25 now trying to become financially independent from my family, and truthfully, it's damn hard. Some days I feel like there's a void inside of me that will never be filled. I'm not gonna stop trying to build my own path and learning how to be a strong, kind, good man - but recently, I've felt so lost. I'm a pretty sensitive guy and sometime it's hard to stand strong when all my examples of manhood were from angry, broken men. Finding this channel brought tears to my eyes - It's given me hope during a hard time.
Hey brother It’s gonna be alright. You’re not alone, we’re out here dealing with the trauma just as you are. Day by day we’re getting better though & that’s the bright side to that shadowy void. It gets better
i come from a similar family background and i think i can relate with you. personally after all the trauma,misery and just awful memories he scared deeply into me i gave him some chances to understand my point of view,my feelings towards him as a kid and now as an adult and see for myself why he acted as he did.he never understood or didnt want to understand my side,his side was that work was too stressful and too time consuming to bother with anything else. he never understood his mistakes,his excuse was always that this was how he was raised. i made it clear to him that he may be my biological father but he is never allowed to call himself a father or call me his son in my presence. the man is beyond redemption in my eyes for he is too blind to see the damage he has done. the only good thing i got from him is a very clear picture as to what a man should never be or become especially if he wants a family
@@badwolfkorko1153 Forgive him. Shows him what a real man (or woman, if you are one) looks like by putting the past in the past. Who knows, maybe he will admire you for your strength in doing the hard (but right) thing (taking responsibility for your conditions, not blaming other, forgiving, etc) versus the easy (but wrong) thing (which would be to hold on to those hard feelings and continue blaming him for the way he acts/acted) and decide to change himself. Maybe he won't change, but that doesn't matter. What matters is that you will have done the right thing, built your character, let go of the past, and become a better person because of it. So as hard as it is, just let go and forgive. Oh, and yes, I agree, learn from his mistakes, and do better than he did. You don't have to carry on any generational dysfunctions. Brake the chain.
@@codyburt6536 (im sorry for the veeery long reply but hopefully you have the time to read it and understand)you seem like a compassionate,good person,im pretty sure you had your own rough times. to help make the picture a bit more clear,i have expressive aphasia,nothing too severe,i can hold a conversation but in a bit slower than normal pace so i can have time to really put down what i want to say and make it understandable,it is much easier for me to write/type my thoughts than talking but it is almost impossible for me to express myself when very stressed or emotionally charged. as a kid whenever my "father" came back from work the rule was not to make a single sound or there was a beating because he needed his "nap after work" time.i couldnt play with toys because of that,i couldnt laugh,i couldnt watch tv.i had to stay in my room and look at the ceiling if i had no homework to do because i was told i was too young to go out and play with other kids without one of my parents to look over me,so i never felt i had made a true connection with any of the kids at my age during school. of course the beatings were not limited to making sounds and waking him up,multiple times he came drunk late at night and started hitting me while i was asleep cause reasons,i really dont know(he always refused that ever happened or he just didnt remember). every friend i had growing up always commented how silent i was and almost never laughed,others considered me just miserable and pushed me away from their friend circles. it was extremely hard for me at a younger age to understand my whole situation and also to open up and explain why i was like i was. by the age of 15-16 i was trying everything i could to stay away from home to avoid him and had attempted to run away a few times but i was too lost and young to figure out the hows and where to go or what to do. i had made attempts to explain my situation to others(adults with families) but it always went very poorly and even was made fun of and belittled. timeskip a few years later i went to a specialist because of severe depression and being suicidal and was diagnosed with cptsd.i had very "hostile ideas" towards him over the years but never acted on them cause freedom is one of the most important things for me and getting locked up would be worse than death. i could sue him,take him to court but i highly doubt its worth the money and time. i just dont care about him enough to make him suffer in any way. im not a religious person but if there is a hell i know for sure that he is going to the bottom of that pit. currently im at a much better place mentally,much more relaxed and looking to do something with my life. i dont know about forgiveness,maybe in a way of not caring i have forgiven him and moved on but i cant say i understand him
@@badwolfkorko1153 I also express myself much better when I have time to think through my thoughts and write them down. Sorry for your rough childhood. I guess those times with your father taught you what kind of person you don't want to be. Hopefully you can learn from it and be better than he was/is.
I just found this channel, THANK You I'm 48 and live like you talk I hope more find your wisdom in words. WE NEED MORE PEOPLE TO BE GOOD, BY CHOICE NOT FORCE NATURALLY WITHOUT THINKING OR BEING ASKED. BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY
There are so many golden nuggets in this talk. One that I used to agree with that I have since changed my mind about is getting worked up over disrespect. I from now on will only become violent over a possible life threat, just about everything else I must walk away from for my family. I mean too much to my family to lose my life over words. An incredible book to read encompassing this idea that changed my actions in many ways is “When violence is the answer” If you lose your life over disrespectful words, you may not be present for your family one day to protect them from a real life threat.
I see where you are Coming from but this is Not really the type of situation I was referring too. I’m talking about people using words against me or my family saying things to me or them and not escalating something over words name calling or verbal disrespect.
Amazing! Do not take this man for granted. He is a blessing from the most high & I appreciate him. To all out there that see this comment. May the most high bless you.
My late husband had trouble balancing being dangerous in the right sense and being calm. His nickname when he was younger was hothead. “I don’t want to be that person anymore ( that hot headed angry type person)”. Wish he could of had a man to chat with like you. He needed that. Thank you for putting this out there for all the men out there that need this talk that don’t have someone in their life to help and teach.
Thank you for taking the time to make these videos. I’m 25 and struggle with feeling lost at times. I admire your wisdom and insight and am working on being a better man each day
I can’t imagine being 25 years old in today’s setting and trying to be a good man. The fact that your here, watching this video is an indication you’re on the right road. Stay strong and never give up. God Bless
I just want to say, thank you for making this video. I’ve been listening to it multiple times a day just so that i can truly memorize and understand your advice. If you ever have more teaching you think might be useful, please make a video about it. They are helping me become a better individual. Thank you again.
I would and could listen and discuss such topics with Dewayne every Sunday if not every day. A simple, clear, voice of reason amongst the chaos of self-indulgence. Kudos to you for developing such a sense of self-awareness.
“Become a man that leaves a big hole when he leaves this world.” I understand the point to leave a hole in peoples hearts and be worth missing. But wisdom will tell you not to leave a physical hole in your line of work or leave a hole in your family that they can’t fill. Knowing you are leaving someday, teach the people around you to be able to fill the role you played. Great video.
I have cut out tv. Got a few channels on youtube I watch and that's about it. This is some real good advice. I'm 27 and just feel like I'm going in circles. The path you laid out here is a logical starting point for me. Thanks.
If I had a time machine to tell 27yr old me, of a similar mind, I'd say this: The path is the point. Learn everything you can about everything you can, help wherever and however you can. That's it. That's all you need to do. Anyone telling you that you should be doing this or that by this age, or certain material things to acquire "to be successful" is selling something. Explore, discover, create, help along the way. The rest will take care of itself.
I don't envy you. I'm 2 decades older than you, so I grew up in a different age. One of skepticism and self education. I have, in the last 5 years, lost much of my material wealth due to the oppressive times we live in. I would not trade that for subservience to evil.
@@bikerbobcat I can't thank you enough. My birthday is due in a few days and I have been terrified. I will be 27, and your comment couldn't help enough. "The path is the point" brought me to tears and I felt sort of realisation, looked up from my phone and just gazed Infront of me while little details I've missed for years rushed towards me. Everything was suddenly fascinating beyond imagination and while I was weeping I really felt that there's no destination to be reached and you gave my whole soul comfort.
i'm a young man that used to be an extremely agitated person because of my views on life but more recently learned to love another, my girlfriend taught me a valuable lesson that life isnt filled with people to hate, but its rather filled with people who need help or need to calm down. I truly am happy that im man enough to say that i still have a few rough edges and that i will sort them out and your videos are a huge help to me on my journey to becoming the man i want to be
The talking all the time part I am learning. I’ve always had some social anxiety although it’s gotten better over the years. I’m 23 and just now learning to keep my mouth shut. I guess I have a habit of not liking awkward silence so I fill it with talking. But I’ve learned the more I talk especially at work the more in trouble I get with others. Not because of drama but because I accidentally give people ammo to use against me because I reveal myself too much. So I’m working on shutting my mind down and being calm.
I’m 22 years old, and I have watched every video you have made. I read books, especially my bible. I feel everything you say, you’re spot on in my opinion. But that is just my opinion. This world is gonna bash you for speaking the truth, but I’ve got quite a few men turned on to your channel and it has changed their lives. Matter of fact, my good friend instead of getting mad now says “he’s disturbing my calm” and we can laugh and the problem goes away
It looks like your whole purpose for being on here is to mock those who see things differently than you do, who do not believe like you do. It’s not an attitude or position that I tolerate for very long. It is disturbing my calm. Either add something constructive, be quiet and learn or move along and stir up stuff on a different channel.
I cant begin to tell you how simplistic messages like these make sense to young men, its almost as if you are talking to us as your younger self and know what we are going through. I appreciate you for making this channel and opening up to us about your personal experiences because this is what we have been looking for , God Bless
Sir, you would definitely leave a big hole in your audience journey. That calmness you speak about is the knowledge we don’t need to tell others to show how much we’ve learned. Your wisdom is very valuable, very helpful and very much appreciated. I always look for gentlemen like yourself to learn from. I don’t know yet if you are religious, God bless you and your journey.
Folks, as much as these tips are important to follow, remember to take it day by day. Making major changes in life is risky, and you are going to make mistakes. We are human. We learn from those mistakes. dont beat yourself up about not being the perfect man either. Love yourself and your loved ones. Be an impact in the community you live in and brighten someone's day because you never know who really needs something to smile about. God bless you all!
As someone who lost their great grandfather to cancer in 2016 I’ve always looked for this kind of man. I’ve always felt super helpless, whenever he passed, he was my rock. And funny when you said it as a young lady who works at Walmart it had me in tears instantly, because it’s the same kind of comfort my tata would give. I miss him so much.
Watched my step father get killed in front of me 24 years ago and sometimes it feels like we were just talking yesterday. I tried to model him for my entire teens and young adulthood but I could never really be him. It destroyed me that I could never seem to reach that goal. He was one of those people that left a hole in the local community when he passed, they shut down local business for the funeral and people just couldn't believe he was gone. He was just a average working man but one of those that effected everyone he came in contact with and don't mess with his family. That hole never goes away or gets filled. I understand what this man is saying 100%
I love listening to your channel and before this video I had so much stress and when i started watching over a year ago and I did exactly this I moved away from my busy life and got back on a ranch moved into the Middle of nowhere got rid of the small town talk and life is so much better iver worked on this ranch about six months now and my bad days havent been bad. No stress relaxing and havent worked a day since I started this ridding job so thank you Dwayne!!!!!!
You hit the "be calm" part on the head of the nail for me with the job description and the music. I used to listen to Scarlxrd 24 hours a day, and he is literally the opposite of calm lol. He still has his time and place in my life but I've been listening to older country more and more lately. Just found this channel, I'm a big Jordan Peterson fan too so hearing you say his name was cool. I appreciate your advice!
I recently found your page and a lot of what you have said resonated with me very much so! You are very wise and I appreciate your words of encouragement. You give off vibes of the father I never had it’s nice. Your words resonated with me so much that as soon as this video ended my buddy called me and I asked for a job and I got right in there and now I got me something to look forward to when it comes to being a man and taking life by the reigns and not letting emotions control you or others emotions, thoughts! Much love and keep up the great work, as well as God Bless
Grandpa Dwayne please dedicate a series of life videos. I’m 21 grew up without a father and I yearned for a father figure and guidance from a man. You’ve changed the way I think. Also make a video telling your whole life story and relationship advice. Thank you for everything 🙏🏾
This one really made an impression on me --- still thinking about it a few days after seeing it. The point on calmness is one I've never heard before and it is so true. Living in Los Angeles it's easy to ignore that one but it's such an important part of self-development.
You always have such a nice show, my sister and myself are very fortunate to have been raised by our grandparents on Dad's side of the family, they raised their family during the depression, we were raised the same as their own kids, to this day I'm thankful for their input in my life !!
I am from the deep south and moved to california as a young adult. I've always kept my morals and values close to me but it has become an anger and I feel at war with everyone around me. I'm far more angry now than i ever was. Not at myself but the world i live in. But what I'm saying is thank you for reminding me what my roots consist of. I needed to hear this because I am going radically right in a radically left state when i should just be my own man.
May I recommend that you consider letting go of the Smartphone and return to using a flip phone. Declare yourself on a Fast of the news. Stop looking at the news for 30 days. Then on day 31 check in with yourself and ask yourself how your really feeling. My hope and belief(if you've stayed away from the news) is that you'll feel a good deal calmer. In today's world with a 24/7 news cycle we have to make more conscious choices about how much "bad news" we let into our lives. My definition of Bad News= News about situations you can't do anything about.
This is outstanding as usual Dewayne. I used to be the super high stress guy, lacked patience, was always agitated & elevated. Now that I work with horses daily I’ve definitely “ found my calm” my wonderful wife of 29 years is so shocked at the man I’ve become
Thanks for being honest enough and vulnerable enough to share that you weren't always this calm! It's a growth journey, and some days we do better than other days.
"Strip a man naked and leave him in a field and all he has is his convictions, his beliefs and his word" My old man's favorite saying when I was growing up
Dear Sir, This I s the first video that I didn't skip a second. Thank you for the speech. My father also told me, just be calm. But you articulated it in a different manner. I can see it a lot more clearly now. Thank you very much!
When I joined the military, I was astounded at the number of guys that didn’t know how to do anything. They couldn’t work with tools, didn’t know anything about cars, couldn’t cook, clean, balance a checkbook the list goes on. I had to ask one of them why they didn’t know how to do anything. The answer I got was: “I didn’t have anyone to teach me.” So, I think a big part of being a good man, is teaching young men how to do stuff and how to live and work in society.
Very sad. And the school systems are trying to turn them into woman to boot.
None of that means anything. How can you penalize people for not knowing something? Were they willing to learn? That's all that matters
@@Kinobambino I didn’t penalize anyone for anything. I simply made an observation.
US Military = Soyjers of Israel 😂 😂 😂
yes. now a days it can amaze you the amount of men today that cant change their own tires.
19:58 "Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is classified as a fruit; Wisdom is knowing not to put it in the fruit salad." I gotta love this guy SO MUCH
"...and Philosophy is questioning whether ketchup is a smoothie."
it's an old saying though, he didn't come up with it. just to be clear. plenty of other reasons to like him
AMEN!
@@0num4well said
Didn't come here to learn. Rather listen. Sense is, but it isn't. Riddle me that cowboy.
"Become the man that leaves a big hole when you leave"
That hit me right where it belonged. That's an incredible mantra.
@@user-tg6jg9wx2e it means you need to be valuable/useful/supportive. To be somebody, not nobody
ayoo
That hit me also. Makes you think about your impact on this world. Will anyone know you were here 1,2,5,10 years after you’re gone.
Damn right, hope I make that hole as big as possible..
AK-47 ROUND: Hold my shell casing.
Jokes a side, yes.
I’m a young black male from the south. That’s relevant only because I’ve grown up in a very different generation, with very different experiences and exposures, with likely very different politics from Dwayne. Yet I find so much incredible benefit in listening to him teach me about what really matters beneath all those superficial layers & labels we use to divide ourselves in society, and use his advice to work on becoming the man I hope to be.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my few years, it’s that when a man of sage wisdom is willing to impart it …You shut up. Listen carefully. Say thank you. Then go do it.
Thank you, sir.
The Classics, never go out of style. Enjoy the style lessons.
We come from different places, but respect, self control, patience, open mindedness, these are all things we have to pursue. I consider that man a brother who pursues those things.
So come on bro, let’s be men and change the world for the better huh?
Very well said!
Nr
Amen 🙏 I agree absolutely 💯
5 essential tips to be a proper man;
1. Be a good man (care for others)
2. Be dangerous (protect the family)
3. Be educated (read & experience)
4. Be calm (walk away from noise)
5. Be wise (apply what you know)
Very true
Gospel right here.
@@JackNapierRisus for me it helps to spend time alone and meditate
@@JackNapierRisus Patience takes practice. Take time to yourself to reflect and you will become more self aware of your actions in the present from that reflection
@@JackNapierRisus What helped me was to challenge my own perspective.
I used to battle with a lot of road rage - constantly snapping on others that didn't drive what I thought was "the right way". Now, I'm terrible at arithmetic. I struggle with remembering numbers - which is kinda key to the whole thing... So I started imagining those folks on the road screaming at me while I try to do math. It became a point on the horizon I could look to for calm. Sounds strange, but this applied to so many different paths in my life.
“A wise man knows he’s got a lot to learn. A fool knows everything.” -hear it from my grandpa a lot 😂
Yep, the longer I live, the more I realize I don’t know as much as I thought I did. But, I love to learn!
Grandpa was wise
Wise words from your old man. Sure he knows a thing or two about life.
Odin said almost exactly that in an old norse poem called Havamal. wisdom like that trancends time
That’s a good saying
"The absence of evil is not an automatic indicator of the presence of good"
Beautiful words sir.
I'd just add that's because evil is already just the absence of good, not a thing of itself.
And that applies to so many things
learned this the hard way, especially from women
the way i look at it most people today aren't good at all. its kinda like all you wouldn't think of an older person as being stupid for not knowing how to use an iPhone. it was never taught to them they didnt grow up with it and it came around when they were past their prime. you don't consider a young person smart for knowing how to use iPhone because they grew up with it its all they know. same with morals, they were taught this ultra moralistic view of the world and they've never known anything else.
they assume they are good people because they are just inherently good, the reality is they would be whoever they were raised to be, if they were born in Nazi Germany they most likely woulda been a Nazi. if born in the American south at the right time most of them wouldn't have thought twice about owning slaves.
this is true of almost every person, but it seems so many people refuse to accept this reality. this is why stuff like moral philosophy or religion or spiritualism or family values or just anything that grounds you morally is so essential, without it we can stray so far from being anything resembling "good".
@@Jim-Mc ahhh that's why folks say your silence on a subject IS a stance in itself. Silence is compliance
"If you like to read, you will never be Lonely"
I am 72 yr old Senior male and this is great advice heck I am learning a few things myself here
Nice work:)
Good on you Roger! Keep it up. 💪
Keep it up 😊❤ im 31 but alone alot. Feeling lonely until i bought a few books and started to feel less lonely and more knowlage x
ROGER!! Those 2 sentences got mustard, what's a great book of any genre that you've read that stuck with you....
"The Secret" the mind power i learned from that book at the time i learned it may have changed my life more than just an extra book on a shelf.
ROGER FOR PREZ!!!!!
Read Qur'an . It will take you closer to Allah
May God Bless you Roger Gardner
For all of the know-it-all’s out there that are so blasted worried about the barn, I moved inside the door of that barn to get out of the rain. It had been raining for hours and the wind has been blowing in, the hay was soaking wet. Give a guy a little bit of credit. I know a thing or two because I’ve seen a thing or two.
Adds to the character quite frankly. I like it.
Silence is complacency.
@ Dry Creek Wrangler School what do you care what they say? You know what's goin on'. Ignore em'. That's what me ma always told me. Actually she said, "Fuck 'em." :D
Still ignorant
taking the time to educate the ignorant, or hopeless know-it-alls, they listen but they don't hear. Just be calm and silent. Be silent 90% and only ask questions 10% of the time this is the 90-10 rule it would be good of your watchers to practice this and watch there lives change before there very eyes.
I damn near cried while watching this at work. I’m a young black male from the north east and yet your videos touch me and push me. Today I make a big change because when I leave this world I must leave a mark and big hole. Thank you, I gotta go to dry creek wrangler school one day!
@The Don I am also a black man who stumbled across his videos and it has been a life changer man. Seriously. We need more individuals like him but just hang in there and apply what he says... (Easier said than done) and it will be all worthwhile. Good luck to you on your journey to self improvement/betterment
Bro I’m also a black man an growing up in the city of Detroit this video is exactly the type of man I’d love to
Learn from , be mentored by at this point in my life I wanna live long an comfortable.
@@evangelist669 same to you my man
where are you from sir? I'm 50 miles east of Philadelphia.
Nothing that he teaches is about being white. This is about looking at things for what they are and not for what they want you to see... that and being tolerant of those differences in a way that is beneficial to you as an individual. It's doing what's right for all involved and that encompasses both the left and right way of viewing the same issues.
Every blue moon, the youtube algorithm gifts you something amazing. This resonates so much with me. Im only 32 but Ive been a piece of work from 13 years old onward, but I never did give up on being a better man throughout. However I do look back and wonder if the person who did all the atrocious things I did in the past was even me at times. Its funny how our brains change with age.
The good journey has just began for you, enjoy it and never look back you’re not going that way.
It’s not the brains that need to change but the spirit.
Word brotha
@fresh living- very true. Well said.
reality is only but a moment in time, our lives doesn't have to be the mirror reflection of who or what we imagine ourselves to be but rather a construct of happenings that shaped us to be the hammer at the end of it all.
I have a friend named Logan that is like this. and just working with him has made me look to him as an example and I have consciously changed for the better. His kindness threw a wrench in my nihilism and cynicism. He's one of the highest quality people I know
That's beautiful man, may you continue to propser for your own greater good and those around you, god bless you and your friend logan! Hope all is well with you :)
Advice for young men (and not so young men):
“We must all suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. The difference is discipline weighs ounces while regret weighs tons.”
I am so tired of this one-size-fits-all advice. Mostly because it BS.
You know better than to parrot what you read on facebook. Find some books. Read them.
Sigh.
Ooh I like that
@@h0ph1p13 It's one size fits all for a reason, because quotes like these are useful. They're true for many. Regrets are far more painful to me, than being disciplined has. I have many regrets and they're haunting. I never regret being disciplined afterwards. I feel the pain of being disciplined when, say, I go for a run. I hate running. But I do it because I know the downstream effects of laziness are far more painful.
Thanks for posting this quote. Where does it come from, please ?
@@h0ph1p13 shit I fucking agree with you, it's annoying af
"A wise man speaks because he has something to say, a fool, because he has to say something." - Plato One of my dad's favorite sayings was, "If you tell everything you know, everyone knows what you know and what they know." Enjoy your videos. Keep up the good work.
Bonezpurz never shuts up.
That first one is classic. I might have to shut up more.
Sad thing is this will go viral
@@sadhu7191 how is this sad? Yes, the intro sucks, but is the knowledge he’s passing on not beneficial? This is pure tons of Gold for those that are 2 feet from Gold and seeking it? Willing to persevere! “What’s your mission?”
I dont mind sharing knowledge and interesting people will share knowledge back. Your dad may've just wanted an excuse for not knowing anything
0:00 Mornin
1:16 Anything you’d like to know?
1:42 The Cigar
3:46 Lots of Lost Young Men
4:20 5 Things
4:39 #1 Work on bein a Good Man
• + - and neutral
Being Good is Proactive
Doing something
Not extreme, just care about people
“How you doin today?”
“You alright? Anything I can do to help?”
8:17 #2 Be A Dangerous Man
He was with The Sheep 🐶 🐑 🐑 🐑
Doing Good
Protecting Those Around Us
11:21 “I am not a danger to those around me.”
12:58 #3 Be Educated
Work your muscle
Keep learning
Better better better
Read and improve
14:50 Be Calm
“This is not the Me that used to be.”
Turn the things off that destroy your calm.
17:08 Quit the jacked up sugar
18:50 Go into your conflict calm
19:37 Wisdom and Knowledge
You don’t have to tell other people everything you know
21:37 Pretend to be that man
22:17 Sit down and figure out what kinda man do you want to be?
22:44 We need Good Effective Men.
“We have enough neutrals”
Would you leave a hole?
Leave a big hole when you leave this world.
You are pretty cool
Thanks man
I love you That Time Stamp Guy !!!
Good, dangerous, educated, calm, what was number five? Was it have a destination? Leave a big hole? Be effective?
I appreciate the time stamps.👏
Lol 0:00 mornin.
I must have replayed Wayne saying “be calm… be calm..” about 10 times. I have problems with reacting instead of being calm. And Wayne saying it the way he does felt like a warm blanket of reassurance over my tendency to react. Wayne, thank you.. now I’m gonna go listen to it 10 more times.
I'm a British guy but everything this guy says is true. Don't watch the news, look after your family and friends and stand up for what's right. I smiled through this whole chat from a man who has learned wisdom.
And look after others like refugees 👍
So...just keep our heads down and out of the government's way, and whatever you think you know, you don't know? lol do remoaners count as british? i'm not sure about that one buddy.
@@Suiseisexy He's saying it's not worth getting upset about the news, because it's all a stage and they're gonna do their b.s. anyway, not to keep your head down and let the govt do whatever it wants.
This is what Americans stand for. Sadly, which you touched on, the news paints us poorly. All we want is to just do to others as we would want. Be kind, be good.
@@Suiseisexy fight for what's right
Another great chat. Reminds me of my husband. He was quiet ,easy going and hilariously deceptive with a slow southern drawl. He used to say “people just think I’m stupid because I talk funny. That’s fine” He could discuss anything with anybody on their own level. Look out if a person had bad intentions toward our kids or me. They would never see it coming.
Miss him everyday.
Wishing you the best; so sorry for you loss. Sounds like a great man. I'm a kinda young, 31, looking for my wife and can only pray that person would miss me when I leave this earth. What yall have is special, and I hope you know he's looking down on you each and every second of every day.
Without the religious goobledigook, sorry for your loss. Seemed like a good man.
I been off social media for about 4 months, saving ALL my money, and been focused on training, WORKING, and taking care of my lady, and my daughter. Thank you for helping us with stay on this traditional path, and keeping us grounded. Continue to live with honor fellas!! ✊🏾
This IS social media, so WTF?
@Autumn Doe the big social media sites are a threat to society if you ask me. TH-cam is a little different in that it's more about watching long form stuff, the "social" aspect ie comments are just a secondary aspect. On twitter the echo chamber and "discussion" aspects are way more emphasized. More harm than good.
@@opuscat999 TH-cam is basically 21st century TV
been off social media and havent watched the news since 2020. let me tell you, its changed my life completely. COMPLETELY
Welcome back lol.
As a 22 year old, It’s challenging for me to understand and act as a proper man. I grew up with only my mother and three older sisters. My father was there until the age of 7 and I feel as though I have never really learned how to act like a man with his absence. I figured out a little bit about being a proper kind of person, but not a proper kind of man. You’re videos help me out very much in understanding what it means to be a man and shape an ideal of how I want to be, something that was left out for me while growing up. Thank you.
It's a journey amanali. Keep growing and be the best man you can be. You're going to change over the years for the better.
I feel you dude
We need it in this world more than anything right now.
If your dad wasn't in your life I doubt it was much you could learn from him anyway. Your mother deserves more credit.
Exactly the same position but I’m learning through experience
Dewayne, This is absolutely my favorite video that you’ve made.
I’m a young man that’s looking to separate myself from the rest of my generation by embracing more traditional values, work ethic, and mindset.
This, along with so much of your other advice has helped me greatly in doing so. Just wanted to say thank you for that!
get married to a GOOD woman and start having children in your 20s. it will keep you focused on the right things in life.
Go to a Christian church and find that woman.
@@MsQ275 that is really good advice!
@@jakubatube what is a thoguht? Curious.
ROMAN CARLISLE: I am a woman, and have been married to the same fellow for 51 years and he always tells anyone who asks, how we made it work. He tells them that you must Communicate to each other. Find you a woman who thinks like you think. Discuss everything always. Hubby and I married after dating for only 6 weeks, and no we didn't know each other before that either, we did live in the same small community but didn't know each other. In that 6 weeks we talked about what our marriage was going to be like, I wasn't going to volunteer each other to do things, for each others parent. That causes a lot of discourse.
But the best thing you can do in any relationship, talk about what you expect, and what you want from that relationship. TALK to that person who you are interested in, watch how she acts and reacts to life in general. Good Luck Sir!!!! I pray you find someone who will be a good fit for you, as we, hubby and I did.
I am in the same shoes as you brother, take it one step at a time, you'll get there. I'm 24.
My biggest conflict currently is my health, I got EoE, can't eat much food and that means I can't maintain my weight very well. Money is tight, and stress is overwhelming to the point my teeth starting to fall apart.
But, I know if I take action and work on myself and my mindset, things can and will get better.
In December of 2020, I was homeless. Today, I'm on my own, making ends meet with a nice job. One hurdle done, but many more to go. Never give up.
Every time I watch one of your videos, it feels like it’s my dad giving some of his wisdom. I’m extremely grateful to have stumbled onto your channel, the world needs more men like you.
Same here, like em a lot
Im 18 years old and came across this video a cuple of weeks ago. My life has made a major turn since watching this video, and applying it to my life. For that I want to say, thank you sir.
Asking someone "is there anything I can do to help" is really important. People love to ask "What's wrong" if you see someone blue, but the issue is, chances are that person has no clue what's wrong and you just made everything worse. Just asking if there's anything they need help with or anything they'd like to talk about is important. We need to look after each other, especially our young men. Not a lot of them have father figures or people that care, be the person who does care!
this is excellent content. not flashy, not fancy and extravagant, just genuine, heartfelt soulful words. much appreciated.
agreed
Yes. Great content here. Close your eyes and Imagine being the Sheep Dog. Quiet, dangerous powerful and ready.
Great advice. The Jodan Peterson video is here : th-cam.com/video/qwaLhSgi7q8/w-d-xo.html (also a great video).
Sir, I can’t thank y’all enough for this video. I shared this video with my stepson and soon enough the entire family was listening. I’m blessed to have 3 daughters and a stepson. I’m cursed to raise them in a world infinitely more complicated then it was 40 years ago when I was a kid. Content, and people like yourself, are harder and harder to come by. Thank you very much.
Some of the most level-headed people I know were hotheads in their younger years. It took me years of hard knocks and heartache to reach calm. I am 47 years old and still seeking self improvement. You inspire me to keep trying. Thanks!
Being a hot head and having a short temper exposes one to the hard knocks of life, hard lessons are very impressionable and humbling on ones psyche....Plus as men we are just running on higher testosterone in our younger years, I reflect on the fights I got into when I was younger, and sometimes it was just ego and me trying to prove myself to myself, now I see it all differently, I have since learned how handle myself in a physical altercation, and now I take more pride and self satisfaction in identifying the situation and avoiding it before it gets physical, or the ability to deescalate the situation so it doesn't get physical.
"The absence of evil doesn't necessarily mean the presence of good"
That hit home sir
Thank u ❤
To all those men and women who had a loving and present dad, grandpa, or any positive male role model in their lives, you are the richest people in the world. I would have given everything to have had my dad. I will share your videos with anyone who needs fatherly advice including my boys. To all the wonderful dads out there, thank you for caring about your children. Fathers are so important! Thank you sir for your videos. God bless us all 🙏🏼
I hope you're doing all right
I’m a woman, but many of these points hit home, especially the importance of calmness.
Got my lesson from a SCUBA instructor many years back. “Calm people live” she said. I’ll never forget that
Iv never regretted being calm in a storm.
Savannah, not surprised you feel that way because I think these are human virtues he’s talking about. A lot of lads don’t have any of it these days and a few of these things, boys are being taught are bad attributes - IF you’re a boy. They don’t know what they’re supposed to be. It’s easier to just check out.
Good to know. I've been calm as far back as I remember. Good to know I'm doing something right
My karate sensei taught me the importance of being calm, especially in a fight. Do not give into anger and do not give in to fear. I think his exact words that he said to my class were "As long as you can think, you are always armed and you are always dangerous."
Be still and know.
Doesn’t get more calm than that.
There a power in the stillness that reveals all you will ever need to know.
"Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is classified as a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad." Love that quote.
@ 00:51 I love to see how much your Channel has grown in just a year, and I appreciate all the wisdom you have shared with all of us. Thank you Dwayne!
Generally speaking, as a man about your age, who enjoys his 5 children and 8 grandchildren, an occasional cigar, and the outdoors, I would like to say thank you. Your philosophy is much like mine and I enjoy hearing you talk about things that matter in addition to the interest your viewers have in wrangling.
As for showing Momma on the channel, talk about the parenting philosophy that guided you as you raised your children and how you all interact with your adult children. Also, have a conversation about how you make your marriage successful.
video just came out today, and its amazing
you remind me a lot of my grandad and ive started listening to your stuff atleast once a day. its been helping me tremendously and its a great comfort to me. thank you for what you do !
As I read through comments, I am impressed with the young men that are endeavoring to improve not only their self-awareness of what they want to achieve in life, but are actively pursuing these notions. My husband of 42 years just said the other day that the younger people working with him asked how he did it, married early, stayed married, raised children, etc. Keep up the good work dear Sir.
Thank you. I woke up to what you're talking about around 27, really been working hard on it. There's been stumbles and regressions, and I'm not where I want to be yet, but I am working on it. Jordan and Jocko helped me get to this point, now I've just discovered you and you describe your earlier version of yourself. I used to be a coward and a door mat. And I counted my good deeds and said they were higher than my misdeeds and mistakes. After years of struggle and personal emergencies, I've learned the value of the things you say in your videos. And you validate my internal values that I was straying from. Thank you. I'm on the journey.
Possitive male guidance is something our culture needs today. There are so many young people out there who have never had anyone. Thats why its so easy for the predators to grow a large audience of people to indoctrinate and drain. Its not just money they drain, its your mental health and life energy too. Thank you sir for your videos.
For the people who feel lost, never give up. Find men who you can learn from be it literate, in life or online. If they are selling you something seriously consider there motives. If its always negative with no way to better yourself or situation ask if this is a person who should be a leader or teacher.
Thank you all and God bless
Your right on the point of Not Enough Male Guidance. With so many issues people have with themselves,. The children fall thru the cracks. (women too) with Soo much separation of families, The people of other cultures, tribes and such, know it takes a village...✌️💗
guys do not know how to express their feelings and demonstrate passive aggression often...
Andrew tate is great
@@montanagal6958 ok libtard
@@geton411 andrew tate is a scammer who feeds off of the insecurities of young men
One of the most dangerous men I ever met was one of the happiest men I ever met. He was at peace with who he was. He taught me a lot when I was a boy.
The most dangerous people are the ones with nothing to lose.
@@mysticpresence very true but people with everything too lose will do anything not too lose what they have built it can make a very dangerous person
@@chettjr1140 Agreed, makes me think of a Mama Grizzly protecting her cub.
Being a chameleon is an underrated skill. Blending in, avoiding conflicts, and making quick decisions. Because if I run into someone with nothing to lose, I'd just humble myself and take a superficial defeat knowing my life is intact.
@@mysticpresence a man with everything to lose is far far far more dangerous and will stop at nothing to protect his own.
my dad wasn't one of those. He was a miserable msnbc type dads who wanted to look like the good guy without really doing anything in the big scale. Strong men create good times. Good times create weak men. Weak men create bad times. Bad times are what's aheed of us right now I'm affraid.
12:48 I don't think I've ever heard someone say this, but this is exactly how I feel. I'm not the person I need to be to be worthy of having a good woman who loves me and a family that depends on me. It would be wrong for me to go after things I'm not prepared to support and defend, even if I want them more than my next breath.
Dude, that's a brutally honest thing to realise and admit - not an easy thing to do. Most blokes I've known in your situation play the victim. Most won't even admit this to themselves.
Word for word.That is exactly what i am feeling and thinking
Self honesty is part of the list for sure. I grew up thinking I didn’t want a family because the world sucks. Now I do want a family but I’m honest with myself I’m not ready in many ways and it sucks. We were all scammed in the education system dumbing us down about the reality of life.
The absence of evil is NOT an automatic indication of the presence of good. That is golden!!
Single father of three here
Just got out of the army a few years back and with my new sales job im learning these principles along with other basic life skills
I am Thankful for this popping up on my feed this morning God bless you
Thank you for your service.
My 70 year old boss when I was working my first job at 13. “It’s better to sit there and let everyone think you’re a fool than open up your mouth and prove it to them.” Never forgot that pearl of wisdom.
My grandfather used to tell me the same thing albeit he phrased it differently
Socrates
“Better to keep your mouth shut and be thought a fool than open it and remove all doubt”
@@MrFredstt Mine too. He put it, "Better to hold your tongue and be thought a fool than to open your mouth & remove all doubt."
I posted this before I saw Steve Wright's post. Great minds think alike?😞
Gritnix....
Proverbs 📜 Chapter 17 verses 12 and assuredly vs 28.....😊
Ask your 📱 or 💻🖥️ for these KING 📖 JAMES gospel scriptures...
My grandfather died from Corona almost 2 years ago at the age of 87 he leaves a hole so large I can only hope to oneday even be half the man he was.
Hey Reid, I’m sorry to hear that man. I haven’t experienced a loss quite like that but I did grow up without a solid father figure, so in some sense I can relate to that hole just left there.
Time bestows venerability, they say. In times where we lack guidance or wish to be a real man’s man, I find peace in knowing it takes time. And since I can’t do anything to hurry along time, all we can do now is be patient. Naturally then, life and God’s gracious hand will form us into the man we’re supposed to be
Sorry for your loss. Your grandfather was in your shoes. He probably had a role model who he admired and followed. Do the same. Use the lessons he taught to be the man he was or more. Nothing is stopping you. Most men have the excuse of never seeing what it looks like. You have the example. Follow it. Best of luck. God bless.
I recently lost my dad in November and found a lot of comfort in someone very similar as the man he was. Love the wisdom. Please do more videos covering life’s journey as a man! Keep it up
1. Goodness
2. Dangerousness
3. Education
4. Calmness
5. Wisdom
I love how all of these can be developed no matter who you are or where you live. Truth rings true whether you live in downtown New York or a deep Holler in Kentucky! I love everything about this!
Like the BOOK of book said,
We can do nothing against the truth, but for the truth.
Not really the definition of dangerous but ok 😂
@Palhaço Triste dont be so bitter. There's a lot a woman can take away from this video as well. Try to appraciate likeminded people, regardless of their gender, and grow alongside them. Instead of looking for enemies everywhere you go
So much wisdom right there!! Life is very much like being on a sailboat. You can either let the wind blow you this way and that, or you can take hold of the tiller and sail to your destination. Don't let the wind dictate where life takes you. Set sail and use that wind to get you to your destination.
I would much rather let Mother Nature send me adrift, aimlessly on the ocean, cloudhidden, whereabouts unknown.
This is one of those rare times when TH-cam recommends a new type of video, that actually resonates with me. I'm 38, but have never felt like I've grown into a full father figure and have instead been toeing the line between being a stupid young man, and Red Foreman (Which is what my wife has started calling me, and it fits).
The thoughts in the video have opened my eyes to the fact I'm stuck with with the negative parts of youth, and the negative parts of maturity without that good stuff in the middle. I'm going to do some self evaluation and find a place to implement these "Rules" into my daily life. Thank you for the great insight!
I feel this
Man, I love this.
In a period in time where most men are influenced by social media men trying to tell them how to be, there’s this dude sitting out there on some chair out by his stable telling you authentic truths about manhood. This is what I aspire to be more than some unnecessarily aggressive and cocky hustler.
Honestly. Good stuff.
As a country guy around your age who is often asked by younger men how to be mor successful in life. I give them 2 pieces of advice. 1. Don't be so quick to marry, as love is blind. Listen to older men that you respect that are on the outside looking in. 2. Limit your debt. Period. Then find a frugal woman who is willing to work and wait for the rewards.
Cody Way: After 48 years of marriage to one woman(by the grace of God), I would say, look for and marry as smart & wise a woman as you can find who will put up with you. To that end, make yourself as tolerable as you possibly can. And overall, get to know God. No matter what you are able to accomplish by your sheer will, it will amount to nothing in the end if you reject Him.
Make no mistake, the war on common sense and decency that is going on today is directed at the person of God & His image reflected in His creation, particularly mankind. Most of those involved in the attack against God don't understand that's what they're doing the unseen forces driving them surely do!
@@davidfong1565 utter truth, brother. 100%
you're unfamiliar with the modern problems young men have to deal with. you're telling them to look for a frugal woman meanwhile most of the women their age are busy taking pictures of their ass to post on instagram and sleeping with strangers from tinder. how are they going to limit their debt when it costs 160k to for a 4 year degree that's required by most adult jobs. and you need a 30 year mortgage for an average house. sorry pops it's a different world than the one you grew up in.
@@davidfong1565 Yes!
My wife of 30 yrs was brilliant and fierce. She died from premature dementia. She was frugal and supportive 100%. I learned so much from her. BTW, she treasured that I was dangerous
From 18:30 on, it reminded me of what the noble Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said. When a man came to him asking for the best advice, the Prophet ﷺ responded “do not become angry” and repeated it three times. Thank you for your talk Dewayne.
This video is exactly what I needed, I’ve been going through an extremely rough patch in my life and this video and talk is something that reminded me of my father that I lost 3 years ago. I haven’t heard a talk like this in some time… thank you.
When I was born 20 years ago, my father and mother separated, I was raised by my grandparents from my fathers side, they are the only people I genuinely love... My grandfather played the biggest part in raising me at a young age, he built my character and my intelligence, nowadays my grandmother is playing the biggest part in raising me, she helps me build my emotional intelligence and guides me through relationships.
I used to hate my parents for not raising me, because I know that's not how it's supposed to be, that's not a "normal" family, a "normal" life, but really, I am blessed to have my grandparents raise me, I have a clear idea of what kind of man I want to become, my grandfather, and what kind of man I don't want to become, my father.
As I sat down to watch your video sir, I saw my grandfather's wisdom in you, I must thank you for putting your wisdom out there, wishing you and your loved ones the best.
I rarely comment on videos but as a 25 year old father with 3 kids, working an industrial maintenance gig in a grease pit, I've never had something, someone said, resonate more. The honesty, openness, and guidance is priceless and I plan to share this with as many men, who may need, as I can. These past few years have been a battle for most young men to find themselves and their ideologies, and people like Peterson,Jocko,Rogan,Goggins, and now you, have been a blessing for us all to help lighten the paths that need it. I know there are many more figures I didn't mention, but I hope with time all those in this battle of straightening out America's morals are properly recognized.
My husband was 25 w our 2 kids (at the time), I was older. Know that those boots on the ground and loyalty pay WAY off. Just keep your eyes on the prize: doing something your fellow fathers won’t.
Keep strong papa.
It’s get good like a fine wine. Follow Christ and be good to mama. You’ll both go thru growth times that have to have adjustments by the other person. But eye on the prize brother. And keep it up! 💪💪💪
Having kids and paying taxes usually grows people up pretty fast.
Too true
Holly fuckin shit breh, you're making me feel like a pussy out here. God bless you and your kids, you just keep your eyes on the tiger and give your children the guidance they so desperately need in these times.
Right there with ya my friend, industrial maintenance technician as well
I have to say thank you Dwayne, this and your other videos has helped me so much in the last month or so. I’m a young adult myself 22, trying to get out this mindset most people are in nowadays where we feel lost, unheard and think we should have it all figured out. My mom sheltered me a lot growing without a father and I know it’s because she love me so much but I now see it has handicapped me for the real world so I’m trying to be a man of my own, that’s why this is so important to me. You and many others you named in this video has helped me and others tremendously with your wisdom.
For the rest of us young adults we are truly blessed and lucky to even have access to videos and people like Dwayne because if we practice these ways starting at the age we are now especially we’ll be unstoppable. Love you all
You are on a great path brotha. 🙏
@@the100thmonkeyjakeparsons thanks brother
Be honest, kind, and work hard. The world is yours!
-Be good
-Be dangerous
-Be educated
-Be calm
-Be wise
I have embedded this in my mind, thank you.
"16yo male here have a dad but not a dad figure any thoughts on which books I should be reading "? Feedback would be appreciated
@@mrlancaster7997 For self development?
Mediations from Marcus Aurelius
I also suggest regularly taking time to think about yourself and how you act with friends/family. Are you being yourself, are you taking decisions with your heart or just to please others and are you kind to the people around you? Make sure to not lose yourself growing up. This is most important.
@@mrlancaster7997 workout, meditate, be good to people, build a manly strengh not to abuse those who are weaker, but to protect them. Be proud of yourself and know that being a real man is a virtue and not every boy finds that virtue in their lives.
Why dangerous? I agree with the others though
@deazylife8815 The ability to do harm is the only way it is possible to show restraint. If a man is incapable of doing harm, he can only be obedient, not good.
What you’re doing brother is very important & needed these days . I’m 28, I have a 2 yr old son. my first child(his momma ain’t around). I was raised by my mother & grandmother around drugs ,violence, negativity etc. Being a father is intimidating of course but even more so when you didn’t have any examples on how to be one . I just moved from where I was born & raised to get a new chance at life,for my boy . Your videos bring me motivation & hope , a lot of it .. I was at a crossroads in my life when I found your YT channel. It certainly helped me make the jump to try an change myself & become someone I’m comfortable with my son looking up to.. Please continue with these as long as possible , what your doing is greatly appreciated & NEEDED . God bless you , your journey & all your loved ones sir. Thankyou ✌🏼
Even though I’m a girl this video helped me realize the kind of person I want to become, I often return to it when I feel lost with myself.
Curious if there's women who give valuable life advice on TH-cam, over 15 years I been looking & can't find any .. just curious where women get wisdom
It's good advice for men and women, for everyone!
@@mraarontorres Same place as men I would think. And elders and mentors.
And, i might add, the kind of man you want!
You can apply this wisdom if you’re a woman, just might have to tweak a few things but this is overall great wisdom for humans in general
I deleted all my subscriptions to my political channels, and replaced them with channels like these. I have never been happier not that I’m blind to other things just opening my life to always learning more and more . ☕️ 👍🏻
You got got a good perspective and I appreciate it.
Pretty much did the same. Unsbbed all the "outrage" channels and whenever a news style video pops i click "Do not recommend". It's basically trying to find wholesome content.. and religions/Christian content. A few Vloggers of Village/Dacha life style in Russia and Ukraine
Man I did the same thing. You may already know about him, but check out Donnie Laws channel. He does stories about Appalachian history, trail cams, metal detecting and even ghost stories.
@@fromoutofnowhere782 Thanks I’ll check his channel out 🙂
@@paulbainjr You're welcome man.
I'd love for "Mama" to talk about raising a big family while living this lifestyle, and also traveling so much around the country/world.
I second that, full of insight and wisdom without doubt.
Yep, this would be great.
very good idea, i'd love to hear her and her point of view.
Adding to that I'm curious of what mama thinks a woman's greatest responsibility is when raising a family.
That would be an interesting discussion.
8 months later and you're at 600k and climbing. Your words and wisdom resonate with so many! Congrats and many wishes on your continued success with the channel and your school.
I love what my family has told me ever since I was little. You have two ears and one mouth, which means you should listen twice as much as you should talk. I love the saying and once I got older and had a little life experience behind it made so much sense. Mr. Dewayne thank you for this video keep it and good job.
Thank you for making these videos. I grew up in a very dysfunctional family. My father was emotionally absent, and when he wasn't, he was explosive and angry. I suffered a lot of trauma growing up and I ended up with life-long mental health issues. I'm 25 now trying to become financially independent from my family, and truthfully, it's damn hard. Some days I feel like there's a void inside of me that will never be filled. I'm not gonna stop trying to build my own path and learning how to be a strong, kind, good man - but recently, I've felt so lost. I'm a pretty sensitive guy and sometime it's hard to stand strong when all my examples of manhood were from angry, broken men. Finding this channel brought tears to my eyes - It's given me hope during a hard time.
Hey brother It’s gonna be alright. You’re not alone, we’re out here dealing with the trauma just as you are. Day by day we’re getting better though & that’s the bright side to that shadowy void. It gets better
i come from a similar family background and i think i can relate with you. personally after all the trauma,misery and just awful memories he scared deeply into me i gave him some chances to understand my point of view,my feelings towards him as a kid and now as an adult and see for myself why he acted as he did.he never understood or didnt want to understand my side,his side was that work was too stressful and too time consuming to bother with anything else. he never understood his mistakes,his excuse was always that this was how he was raised. i made it clear to him that he may be my biological father but he is never allowed to call himself a father or call me his son in my presence. the man is beyond redemption in my eyes for he is too blind to see the damage he has done. the only good thing i got from him is a very clear picture as to what a man should never be or become especially if he wants a family
@@badwolfkorko1153 Forgive him. Shows him what a real man (or woman, if you are one) looks like by putting the past in the past. Who knows, maybe he will admire you for your strength in doing the hard (but right) thing (taking responsibility for your conditions, not blaming other, forgiving, etc) versus the easy (but wrong) thing (which would be to hold on to those hard feelings and continue blaming him for the way he acts/acted) and decide to change himself. Maybe he won't change, but that doesn't matter. What matters is that you will have done the right thing, built your character, let go of the past, and become a better person because of it. So as hard as it is, just let go and forgive. Oh, and yes, I agree, learn from his mistakes, and do better than he did. You don't have to carry on any generational dysfunctions. Brake the chain.
@@codyburt6536 (im sorry for the veeery long reply but hopefully you have the time to read it and understand)you seem like a compassionate,good person,im pretty sure you had your own rough times. to help make the picture a bit more clear,i have expressive aphasia,nothing too severe,i can hold a conversation but in a bit slower than normal pace so i can have time to really put down what i want to say and make it understandable,it is much easier for me to write/type my thoughts than talking but it is almost impossible for me to express myself when very stressed or emotionally charged. as a kid whenever my "father" came back from work the rule was not to make a single sound or there was a beating because he needed his "nap after work" time.i couldnt play with toys because of that,i couldnt laugh,i couldnt watch tv.i had to stay in my room and look at the ceiling if i had no homework to do because i was told i was too young to go out and play with other kids without one of my parents to look over me,so i never felt i had made a true connection with any of the kids at my age during school. of course the beatings were not limited to making sounds and waking him up,multiple times he came drunk late at night and started hitting me while i was asleep cause reasons,i really dont know(he always refused that ever happened or he just didnt remember). every friend i had growing up always commented how silent i was and almost never laughed,others considered me just miserable and pushed me away from their friend circles. it was extremely hard for me at a younger age to understand my whole situation and also to open up and explain why i was like i was. by the age of 15-16 i was trying everything i could to stay away from home to avoid him and had attempted to run away a few times but i was too lost and young to figure out the hows and where to go or what to do. i had made attempts to explain my situation to others(adults with families) but it always went very poorly and even was made fun of and belittled. timeskip a few years later i went to a specialist because of severe depression and being suicidal and was diagnosed with cptsd.i had very "hostile ideas" towards him over the years but never acted on them cause freedom is one of the most important things for me and getting locked up would be worse than death. i could sue him,take him to court but i highly doubt its worth the money and time. i just dont care about him enough to make him suffer in any way. im not a religious person but if there is a hell i know for sure that he is going to the bottom of that pit. currently im at a much better place mentally,much more relaxed and looking to do something with my life. i dont know about forgiveness,maybe in a way of not caring i have forgiven him and moved on but i cant say i understand him
@@badwolfkorko1153 I also express myself much better when I have time to think through my thoughts and write them down. Sorry for your rough childhood. I guess those times with your father taught you what kind of person you don't want to be. Hopefully you can learn from it and be better than he was/is.
I just found this channel, THANK You I'm 48 and live like you talk I hope more find your wisdom in words. WE NEED MORE PEOPLE TO BE GOOD, BY CHOICE NOT FORCE NATURALLY WITHOUT THINKING OR BEING ASKED. BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY
There are so many golden nuggets in this talk. One that I used to agree with that I have since changed my mind about is getting worked up over disrespect. I from now on will only become violent over a possible life threat, just about everything else I must walk away from for my family. I mean too much to my family to lose my life over words.
An incredible book to read encompassing this idea that changed my actions in many ways is “When violence is the answer”
If you lose your life over disrespectful words, you may not be present for your family one day to protect them from a real life threat.
I see where you are
Coming from but this is Not really the type of situation I was referring too. I’m talking about people using words against me or my family saying things to me or them and not escalating something over words name calling or verbal disrespect.
Amazing! Do not take this man for granted. He is a blessing from the most high & I appreciate him. To all out there that see this comment. May the most high bless you.
My late husband had trouble balancing being dangerous in the right sense and being calm. His nickname when he was younger was hothead. “I don’t want to be that person anymore ( that hot headed angry type person)”. Wish he could of had a man to chat with like you. He needed that. Thank you for putting this out there for all the men out there that need this talk that don’t have someone in their life to help and teach.
Thank you for taking the time to make these videos. I’m 25 and struggle with feeling lost at times. I admire your wisdom and insight and am working on being a better man each day
I can’t imagine being 25 years old in today’s setting and trying to be a good man. The fact that your here, watching this video is an indication you’re on the right road. Stay strong and never give up. God Bless
I am also 25 and seeking peace, calm and clarity in life and have been thrown off for years needing help badly thank you for sharing.
I just want to say, thank you for making this video. I’ve been listening to it multiple times a day just so that i can truly memorize and understand your advice. If you ever have more teaching you think might be useful, please make a video about it. They are helping me become a better individual. Thank you again.
I would and could listen and discuss such topics with Dewayne every Sunday if not every day. A simple, clear, voice of reason amongst the chaos of self-indulgence. Kudos to you for developing such a sense of self-awareness.
“Become a man that leaves a big hole when he leaves this world.” I understand the point to leave a hole in peoples hearts and be worth missing. But wisdom will tell you not to leave a physical hole in your line of work or leave a hole in your family that they can’t fill. Knowing you are leaving someday, teach the people around you to be able to fill the role you played.
Great video.
Wonderful, beautiful, & very true..!!!!!!
I have cut out tv. Got a few channels on youtube I watch and that's about it. This is some real good advice. I'm 27 and just feel like I'm going in circles. The path you laid out here is a logical starting point for me. Thanks.
If I had a time machine to tell 27yr old me, of a similar mind, I'd say this: The path is the point. Learn everything you can about everything you can, help wherever and however you can. That's it. That's all you need to do. Anyone telling you that you should be doing this or that by this age, or certain material things to acquire "to be successful" is selling something. Explore, discover, create, help along the way. The rest will take care of itself.
I don't envy you. I'm 2 decades older than you, so I grew up in a different age. One of skepticism and self education. I have, in the last 5 years, lost much of my material wealth due to the oppressive times we live in. I would not trade that for subservience to evil.
@@bikerbobcat I can't thank you enough. My birthday is due in a few days and I have been terrified. I will be 27, and your comment couldn't help enough. "The path is the point" brought me to tears and I felt sort of realisation, looked up from my phone and just gazed Infront of me while little details I've missed for years rushed towards me. Everything was suddenly fascinating beyond imagination and while I was weeping I really felt that there's no destination to be reached and you gave my whole soul comfort.
You have shown wisdom in your words and actions. Life was meant to be enjoyed through experiences not the accumulation of things. Cheers to you mate
i'm a young man that used to be an extremely agitated person because of my views on life but more recently learned to love another, my girlfriend taught me a valuable lesson that life isnt filled with people to hate, but its rather filled with people who need help or need to calm down. I truly am happy that im man enough to say that i still have a few rough edges and that i will sort them out and your videos are a huge help to me on my journey to becoming the man i want to be
As someone who did not come from a family who taught these values, finding your videos means quite a lot to me. Thank you for sharing this message
The talking all the time part I am learning. I’ve always had some social anxiety although it’s gotten better over the years. I’m 23 and just now learning to keep my mouth shut. I guess I have a habit of not liking awkward silence so I fill it with talking. But I’ve learned the more I talk especially at work the more in trouble I get with others. Not because of drama but because I accidentally give people ammo to use against me because I reveal myself too much. So I’m working on shutting my mind down and being calm.
JDS you are very wise to learn now rather than......'never' for some people! 🙂 Best to you in all you pursue.
Silence is golden
You can be any way you choose!! U will find ur way into strong confidence 😊
I’m 22 years old, and I have watched every video you have made. I read books, especially my bible. I feel everything you say, you’re spot on in my opinion. But that is just my opinion.
This world is gonna bash you for speaking the truth, but I’ve got quite a few men turned on to your channel and it has changed their lives.
Matter of fact, my good friend instead of getting mad now says “he’s disturbing my calm” and we can laugh and the problem goes away
The truth is Jordan Peterson is addicted to drugs, does not believe in our Father and will never say Jesus Christs name.
You are probably to slow to understand that there is a big path and a narrow one. Some bots just cannot be helped.
@Chrome Book this is embarrassingly naive, and this is coming from someone who doesn’t believe
It looks like your whole purpose for being on here is to mock those who see things differently than you do, who do not believe like you do. It’s not an attitude or position that I tolerate for very long. It is disturbing my calm. Either add something constructive, be quiet and learn or move along and stir up stuff on a different channel.
@Chrome Book Like I said, some bots cannot be helped.
I cant begin to tell you how simplistic messages like these make sense to young men, its almost as if you are talking to us as your younger self and know what we are going through. I appreciate you for making this channel and opening up to us about your personal experiences because this is what we have been looking for , God Bless
Sir, you would definitely leave a big hole in your audience journey. That calmness you speak about is the knowledge we don’t need to tell others to show how much we’ve learned. Your wisdom is very valuable, very helpful and very much appreciated. I always look for gentlemen like yourself to learn from. I don’t know yet if you are religious, God bless you and your journey.
I’m a woman, and loved this talk. So real just what my soul needed. Thank you sir!
Great Message My Brother! I love it. So encouraging. Thank You for taking the time to share with us. God Bless You.
Folks, as much as these tips are important to follow, remember to take it day by day. Making major changes in life is risky, and you are going to make mistakes. We are human. We learn from those mistakes. dont beat yourself up about not being the perfect man either. Love yourself and your loved ones. Be an impact in the community you live in and brighten someone's day because you never know who really needs something to smile about. God bless you all!
As someone who lost their great grandfather to cancer in 2016 I’ve always looked for this kind of man. I’ve always felt super helpless, whenever he passed, he was my rock. And funny when you said it as a young lady who works at Walmart it had me in tears instantly, because it’s the same kind of comfort my tata would give. I miss him so much.
Watched my step father get killed in front of me 24 years ago and sometimes it feels like we were just talking yesterday. I tried to model him for my entire teens and young adulthood but I could never really be him. It destroyed me that I could never seem to reach that goal. He was one of those people that left a hole in the local community when he passed, they shut down local business for the funeral and people just couldn't believe he was gone. He was just a average working man but one of those that effected everyone he came in contact with and don't mess with his family. That hole never goes away or gets filled. I understand what this man is saying 100%
I love listening to your channel and before this video I had so much stress and when i started watching over a year ago and I did exactly this I moved away from my busy life and got back on a ranch moved into the Middle of nowhere got rid of the small town talk and life is so much better iver worked on this ranch about six months now and my bad days havent been bad. No stress relaxing and havent worked a day since I started this ridding job so thank you Dwayne!!!!!!
So much valuable information for the betterment of people in such a short (relatively speaking) video.
Thank you for sharing such videos DeWayne.
The bad man never learns from his mistakes… The good man learns from his mistakes… The wise man learns from other man’s mistakes
Acting like the person you want to be is the KEY to starting to become the person that you want to be. SERIOUSLY!!!!
You hit the "be calm" part on the head of the nail for me with the job description and the music. I used to listen to Scarlxrd 24 hours a day, and he is literally the opposite of calm lol. He still has his time and place in my life but I've been listening to older country more and more lately. Just found this channel, I'm a big Jordan Peterson fan too so hearing you say his name was cool. I appreciate your advice!
I recently found your page and a lot of what you have said resonated with me very much so! You are very wise and I appreciate your words of encouragement. You give off vibes of the father I never had it’s nice. Your words resonated with me so much that as soon as this video ended my buddy called me and I asked for a job and I got right in there and now I got me something to look forward to when it comes to being a man and taking life by the reigns and not letting emotions control you or others emotions, thoughts! Much love and keep up the great work, as well as God Bless
“It is better to be a warrior in a garden than a gardener in a war.”
"war sucks". Seems more accurate.
@@paulgoogol2652 Nah, it doesn't for some & for many it's a baptism by fire. Read Ernst Junger
@@snowfrosty1 i spit on religions bro.
. . . Chinese proverb
@@paulgoogol2652of course. but not being prepared for it is stupid.
Grandpa Dwayne please dedicate a series of life videos. I’m 21 grew up without a father and I yearned for a father figure and guidance from a man. You’ve changed the way I think. Also make a video telling your whole life story and relationship advice. Thank you for everything 🙏🏾
Right here with you man.
Just the fact that you want to learn speaks volumes about your character already
@@lizzymeacham3224 thank you so much
Same here bud. The quilt of my life is stitched together from all the fabric of stories from men no one would listen to, not even their own kids.
26 and never had one either, I also desired the same
This one really made an impression on me --- still thinking about it a few days after seeing it. The point on calmness is one I've never heard before and it is so true. Living in Los Angeles it's easy to ignore that one but it's such an important part of self-development.
You always have such a nice show, my sister and myself are very fortunate to have been raised by our grandparents on Dad's side of the family, they raised their family during the depression, we were raised the same as their own kids, to this day I'm thankful for their input in my life !!
I am from the deep south and moved to california as a young adult. I've always kept my morals and values close to me but it has become an anger and I feel at war with everyone around me. I'm far more angry now than i ever was. Not at myself but the world i live in. But what I'm saying is thank you for reminding me what my roots consist of. I needed to hear this because I am going radically right in a radically left state when i should just be my own man.
Why did you move from the south to this deteriorating state?
May I recommend that you consider letting go of the Smartphone and return to using a flip phone.
Declare yourself on a Fast of the news.
Stop looking at the news for 30 days.
Then on day 31 check in with yourself and ask yourself how your really feeling.
My hope and belief(if you've stayed away from the news) is that you'll feel a good deal calmer.
In today's world with a 24/7 news cycle we have to make more conscious choices about how much "bad news" we let into our lives.
My definition of Bad News= News about situations you can't do anything about.
It is the result of moving to a very toxic, fake environment.
The world is crooked, and we don't belong here. We are from somewhere else, like Jesus said
We are in this world, not of it.
The Father for the fatherless. Respect. Big blessing and keep doing what your doing, people need the information
This is outstanding as usual Dewayne. I used to be the super high stress guy, lacked patience, was always agitated & elevated. Now that I work with horses daily I’ve definitely “ found my calm” my wonderful wife of 29 years is so shocked at the man I’ve become
Thanks for being honest enough and vulnerable enough to share that you weren't always this calm! It's a growth journey, and some days we do better than other days.
"Strip a man naked and leave him in a field and all he has is his convictions, his beliefs and his word" My old man's favorite saying when I was growing up
Respect to your father. I'm gonna use that with my kids.
Listening to you on this topic is like a well-needed Sunday sermon, without the preaching. Thank you so much!
Dear Sir,
This I s the first video that I didn't skip a second. Thank you for the speech. My father also told me, just be calm. But you articulated it in a different manner. I can see it a lot more clearly now. Thank you very much!
5:30 "The absence of evil is not an automatic indication of the presence of good". These words hit home.