Saw Deicide last night. Someone said fuck Chuck Schuldiner out loud and Glen Benton scolded the fuck out of him. Glen could easily pass for a demon, he’s scary when he gets mad.
Portal- Your metal head friends don’t trust you around their kids. Arghoslent- You say lyrics don’t matter ALOT. Deeds of Flesh- You are either a Tec Death fan or you enjoy DoF’s good albums. Opeth - You wear a turtleneck.
These are hilarious and spot-on. Speaking of Cryptopsy, they're one of my all-time favorite bands, but I just can't get over some of their lyrics. Some of it is just funny.
Fr he writes some of the most brutal and well written lyrics only to then sound like a deranged mental asylum patient who got possessed but it sounds fucking amazing so who cares
French Death Metal edition: Aosoth: You really like archery and cutting your flesh for Satan. Atavisma: You like to hang out in the Parisian catacombs. Temple of Baal: You secretly like Doom Metal. Kaabalh: You secretly like Atavisma. A LOT. Mercyless: You secretly like Thrash Metal. N.K.V.D.: Every friday night you meet your dominatrix who's dressed as a totalitarian general and get your butt whipped hard. You're also nostalgic of Vichy and the occupation, for some reason. Autokrator: Every friday night you meet your slave and dress up as a totalitarian general and whip his butt hard. You're also nostalgic of the USSR and Stalin, for some reason. Funeralium: You have too much free time on your hands. Impureza: You secretly wish you were a matador. Loudblast: You like Thrash Metal more than Mercyless.
Cannibal Corpse one really got me. I’m literally the guy with cargo pants and combat boots at every concert. By the way holy fuck you actually know Guttural Secrete, props on you.
Oxygen Destroyer: You've probably had or you have an unhealthy obsession with the Godzilla franchise. That said, my favorites here are Death, Morbid Angel, Arch Enemy, Suffocation, Venom Prison, and Incantation. Almost all of these bands are sick, though
LMAO that was good. Having hung out with Cephalic Carnage I gotta say that was the perfect descriptor to go along with them and their ultra fans. Those guys are funny as hell in person tho. I was laughing nearly all night....I was super high too soooo
Thumbnail was spot on, I complained once about a tour with hate eternal not having hate eternal while in my town while putting down other bands that they had been here with in the recent to the time past, and Eric Rutan messaged me to set it all straight
I think that was me in high school though I was more into dubstep and power/prog metal then. The only BDM song I know is What A Horrible Night To Have A Curse.
Man, all of these are spot on! Though I knew only a handful of the bands, I'll gladly listen to the ones I don't know. I kind of use your videos to discover more bands, songs, genres etc. Thanks for the videos, they're hella entertaining! :D
My favorite is Atheist, but I felt like the Morbid Angel description was pretty on the money. Morbid Angel is my favorite band that was mentioned.
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You said “you’ve known the taste of human flesh” on devourment I was like “I don’t think I’ve tasted human before?” Then I got flashbacks to all the times I’ve purposely cut skin off of my fingers to eat it. My severe nail biting problem has taught me that fingers taste GREAT. I’m not even trying to be edgy the skin around my nails is so fucking good. I don’t know what it is it’s just good.
On the one hand, the Cannibal Corpse & Cargo Shorts diagnosis fits me perfectly. On the other, I'm an Amon Amarth fan who's also sick of people trying to get me to watch the Vikings show. I just want to drink beer and go to Renn Faire lol
I was not expecting him to include Cannabis Corpse, also as a Visceral Disgorge and Guttural Secrete fan I can confirm I know the taste of human flesh, it's reminiscent of pork
Cerebral Rot: you either have eaten poop, or you've put way too much thought into eating poop Dragged Into Sunlight: everyone is terrified of you, and they're right to be Sanguisugabogg: you're the kind of guy to follow bands for their merch exclusively Skinless: you probably have a collection of combat footage gore
@@Radio-Friendly-Unit @Radio Friendly Unit I love Chris Barnes pre "eeeeee" era. Six Feet Under's Haunted album is fire as well. It's refreshing to see someone who's not shitting on his entire career.
@@MoRaby the only Six Feet Under I've ever listened to was the Graveyard Classics album. I thought the covers were quite good. Especially the studio cover of TNT. But the one live video of the cover where he goes "WATCH NE EXPLEEED" is fucking hilarious no matter what lol
If we're going with any style of death metal, then Opeth it is for me. If we're going for exclusively OSDM bands, then it's Morbid Angel but really only for their first three albums. Weird thing is that I hate slimy things. I'm like OCD about cleanliness. Make of that what you will. Lol.
I am a restless handwasher too! And MA are my favourite. Btw, do you like their 5th album ("Formulas...") or does it sound weird and slimey to you? I sure do like it - it's a brootal one
Anata - You're the type of person that keeps their dream alive even after is long dead Spawn of Possession - You're the type of person that keeps their dream alive even after is long dead Necrophagist - You're the type of person that keeps their dream alive even after is long dead
Obituary, Bolt Thrower and Morbid Angel were on point. (And yes, I’m a big anime and Quake nerd, so I’d definitely be buds with Trey from Morbid Angel).
I love several of the bands here. I'm a big fan of Dark Tranquillity (and melodeath in general), as well as Devourment (Molesting the Decapitated is best) and Visceral Disgorge (I liked Ingesting Putridity best out of VD's discography). So apparently, I would be a caring, candid cannibal? Lol
@@jojoplaysmusic I will subscribe and look out for that! Not all Cattle Decap fans are vegan, by the way (that’s too easy). The Cannabis Corpse one was dead on, homie. 😂
I have been playing RuneScape for a very long time and rarely meet people who listen to metal. I have been only trying to meet metalheads on RS for 20 years lol
(Although, not listed) I do like Brujeria as a Mexican death metal band option. Not only because I am proud to be Mexican-Salvadoran, but because that band is badass. As for a Brazilian option, I like the all-woman led band Nervosa! Lastly, as for a regular American option, I am a Deicide fan. I love the song Dead by Dawn especially. Their best album is Once Upon the Cross though. As for the desprcirption, it was hilarious, but nah man, I don't care if anyone is a poser or not, I won't judge. P.S. I'll try not. 😉
Vader: You cheer at Darth Vader’s brutal scenes in Rogue One and the Obi-Wan show and anything else and declare to anyone who will pretend to listen politely that “this is why he has a death metal band named after him!”
Dying Fetus - Same deal as Misery Index. You hate the government and politics with all your being. Aborted - You have a whole shelf full of old school horror films and you've watched every single one. Archspire - You've come to accept that you'll never be able to play like them. And that's why you like em. Kataklysm - You think death metal songs about spirits and ghosts are better than songs about gore and violence. Benighted - Same deal as Aborted. You're a giant horror film fanatic.
I got 3 No1 fave death metal bands. 1) I listen to thrash metal almost exclusively : true 2) I am a huge nerd : true I 'll help you guess the 3rd one : I always notice the bass , can't live without a certain plant, and my top fave artist of all might be Sun Ra.
You can now watch PART 2 here: th-cam.com/video/4qECceRZyJ0/w-d-xo.html
Arch Enemy should have been: You'd like to talk to the vocalist. You'd also like to talk to any woman you're not related to.
God that’s right
Even though the first three albums with male vocals are amazing
@@eenshcobob The best ones imo.
Obituary is fucking spot on. We all just want good music, headbanging and happiness lmao
Add in some nice (non-craft) beer.
@@jojoplaysmusic whats your fav death metal band bro?
@@WHOREHAMMER_OFFICIAL I’m always torn between Hate Eternal and Gorguts.
Yup, saw the live in Ybor City, and well, yup. But I'm also guilty of the Chuck stuff too
Suffocation one got me laughing my ass off ( I actually bought an axe last week so the chopping wood part was kinda right )
Yeah I saw you. I was there 👁👁
Saw Deicide last night. Someone said fuck Chuck Schuldiner out loud and Glen Benton scolded the fuck out of him. Glen could easily pass for a demon, he’s scary when he gets mad.
After watching several of your videos, I'm impressed by how much old school metal you know for your age. \m/
You could say I’m something of a connoisseur.
Its not like they banned death metal past the 90s
Portal- Your metal head friends don’t trust you around their kids.
Arghoslent- You say lyrics don’t matter ALOT.
Deeds of Flesh- You are either a Tec Death fan or you enjoy DoF’s good albums.
Opeth - You wear a turtleneck.
I like Arghoslent and think lyrics matter😈😈😈
Opeth is Death Metal for gentlemen lol
Path of the Weakening is something every BDM fan should listen too.
@@dq7860 BDM as Dahlia?
@@td601 Brutal Death Metal
Not only related to DM, I say "Chuck would be proud of you" to my homies in a daily basis
Blood Incantation: You're 👽
Habe u seen an alien?
@@Jesusblowsme666 th-cam.com/video/Ozor-bT-sOs/w-d-xo.html
@@Jesusblowsme666 me encanta tu nombre XD
Nah. Hypocrisy.
Chuck would be proud.
Maybe, but would Edgeworth be?
Definitely guilty of leaving the odd "Chuck would be proud " comment 🤘🏻
you and me.both brother
These are hilarious and spot-on. Speaking of Cryptopsy, they're one of my all-time favorite bands, but I just can't get over some of their lyrics. Some of it is just funny.
2:14 Arch Enemy is my favorite band mentioned here, and this seems accurate.
The Beneath the Massacre one and both gorguts ones are just on point. Agree LOL.
Nice Ad Nauseum profile pic btw
When you said Cryptopsy, I thought about None So Vile. BRUAL LYRICS. But... Can u understand? IT DOESN'T MATTERRR
Exactly
Fr he writes some of the most brutal and well written lyrics only to then sound like a deranged mental asylum patient who got possessed but it sounds fucking amazing so who cares
French Death Metal edition:
Aosoth: You really like archery and cutting your flesh for Satan.
Atavisma: You like to hang out in the Parisian catacombs.
Temple of Baal: You secretly like Doom Metal.
Kaabalh: You secretly like Atavisma. A LOT.
Mercyless: You secretly like Thrash Metal.
N.K.V.D.: Every friday night you meet your dominatrix who's dressed as a totalitarian general and get your butt whipped hard. You're also nostalgic of Vichy and the occupation, for some reason.
Autokrator: Every friday night you meet your slave and dress up as a totalitarian general and whip his butt hard. You're also nostalgic of the USSR and Stalin, for some reason.
Funeralium: You have too much free time on your hands.
Impureza: You secretly wish you were a matador.
Loudblast: You like Thrash Metal more than Mercyless.
Cannibal Corpse one really got me. I’m literally the guy with cargo pants and combat boots at every concert.
By the way holy fuck you actually know Guttural Secrete, props on you.
Oxygen Destroyer: You've probably had or you have an unhealthy obsession with the Godzilla franchise.
That said, my favorites here are Death, Morbid Angel, Arch Enemy, Suffocation, Venom Prison, and Incantation. Almost all of these bands are sick, though
Never thought I’d see the local band Vitrial be featured on a TH-cam video. Can’t wait to get my sweet vinyl from them that’s how Cool they are. 🔥😎
Vitriol are a magnificent band. They get me going. Perfect music for working out and pumping iron.
They are so sick, Kyle is the nicest dude ever 🤘
Death, Possessed, TBDM, At The Gates, Cannibal Corpse and Venom Prison
TBDM and At The Gates parts rlly talk about me so accurately
I hold the knowledge of multitudes.
The Six Feet Under one literally made me put down my phone laughing.
LMAO that was good.
Having hung out with Cephalic Carnage I gotta say that was the perfect descriptor to go along with them and their ultra fans.
Those guys are funny as hell in person tho. I was laughing nearly all night....I was super high too soooo
I’m just gonna say: I never miss.
@@jojoplaysmusic I was hoping to see Between The Buried and Me on your list.
I wanted to know the type I am lol
Thumbnail was spot on, I complained once about a tour with hate eternal not having hate eternal while in my town while putting down other bands that they had been here with in the recent to the time past, and Eric Rutan messaged me to set it all straight
Erik Rutan is a real one.
TBDM: (Alternatively) You're the only metalhead in town so the Core kids adopted you.
Lmao I know someone whose case is exactly that.
@@jojoplaysmusic Myself included, lmao
I think that was me in high school though I was more into dubstep and power/prog metal then. The only BDM song I know is What A Horrible Night To Have A Curse.
Death is probably my favorite and I rarely mention Chuck on the web
You just did.
@@jojoplaysmusic I said rarely, not never
Man, all of these are spot on! Though I knew only a handful of the bands, I'll gladly listen to the ones I don't know. I kind of use your videos to discover more bands, songs, genres etc. Thanks for the videos, they're hella entertaining! :D
Oh that’s very cool. I appreciate that man!
Vader fans (me) we like trem picking, polish names you can't pronounce, and arguing about whether we hate The Empire cd more or The Beast cd
The Beast. The Empire had a couple of legit bangers.
My favorite is Atheist, but I felt like the Morbid Angel description was pretty on the money. Morbid Angel is my favorite band that was mentioned.
You said “you’ve known the taste of human flesh” on devourment I was like “I don’t think I’ve tasted human before?” Then I got flashbacks to all the times I’ve purposely cut skin off of my fingers to eat it. My severe nail biting problem has taught me that fingers taste GREAT. I’m not even trying to be edgy the skin around my nails is so fucking good. I don’t know what it is it’s just good.
Guess I can freely say: I never miss
He was right tho lmao.
I don't know if I should feel called out or proud of being a Black Dahlia fan. . .
Neither, anyone who doesn't like BDM needs to get a brain scan.
Proud!
Cannabis corpse does speak for itself. XD I got the “Nug So Vile” CD and I listen to it often.
That low-key Jab at Obituary fans lol.
Entombed/dismember one killed me! As a big fan I completely agree that we are numb in the ears, a small price to listen to the hm2
Ain’t that right
Well, not unless it’s a entombed album that isn’t one of the first few ;)
Cannabis Corpse: you really like death metal, especially after a few bong rips
Disgorge (Mexico): do you eat anything other than raw meat and guts???
That applies to Disgorge (USA) too
I guess i have to say it...
"Chuck would be proud"
I respect the speed limit while blasting Piss Angel on repeat
Doubt it
On the one hand, the Cannibal Corpse & Cargo Shorts diagnosis fits me perfectly. On the other, I'm an Amon Amarth fan who's also sick of people trying to get me to watch the Vikings show. I just want to drink beer and go to Renn Faire lol
Make that two beers, sir.
@@jojoplaysmusic More beer is always the correct decision. 🍻
@@Fwufikins the other one’s for me of course
I play 40k and have not heard of Bolt Thrower, thank you ❤️
My pleasure
This list is golden. He 100% nailed me with gorguts.
Happy to see Demilich on here too! I don't live in a sewer--yet.
Here in the sewer we don't have good wi-fi connection.
I bet
I was not expecting him to include Cannabis Corpse, also as a Visceral Disgorge and Guttural Secrete fan I can confirm I know the taste of human flesh, it's reminiscent of pork
Is it really? Interesting.
Cerebral Rot: you either have eaten poop, or you've put way too much thought into eating poop
Dragged Into Sunlight: everyone is terrified of you, and they're right to be
Sanguisugabogg: you're the kind of guy to follow bands for their merch exclusively
Skinless: you probably have a collection of combat footage gore
The Cerebral Rot one is golden
obituary is always my favorite band ❤️
When he says "CHOPPED IN HAUUUGH" it really hits hard
@@Radio-Friendly-Unit yeah I feel in my soul when he says "FEELL THE BLUOOOD SPLITTING FROMM YOUUURR MOUUUF"
@@heitorgalvao2281 and it pulls on my heartstrings when he goes "WOTH ROTTUN WHEYS COMES DESTINEEEEEE"
@@Radio-Friendly-Unit and "FEEAL THE BLOEAD SPEALL FRO YOURE MOTH" one of the most lines ever
@@Radio-Friendly-Unit i prefer when he says "SLOWLEE WE RAAAAUUUUUWWWGGHHHHHHHH SLOLEEEEEE WE RAUUUUUUUUUUUUWWWWWWWGGGGHHHHH
02:31 "Speaks for itself, doesn't it?" 😂😂😂 hahahaha
Nile is my favorite. This is so accurate, in addition to a few other middle eastern instruments
Gonna see those legends in less than a month.
@@jojoplaysmusic I couldn’t be more envious
@@JustinSmith-rr3se naturally.
That last one was terrifyingly accurate
I clicked on this because Trey Azagthoth is my favorite death metal guitarist and I host a podcast about manga so you fucking nailed it
I do play 40k, and the fourth crusdade by bolt thrower is one of my favorite songs :)
my favorite is death, but possessed is the accurate one for me
It's funny because I actually do almost exclusively listen to thrash, and I love possessed
Inquest - chess nerd
Napalm death - dump truck driver
Extremity - u love to bake pies and cookies for the fam
Gotta work on my bench pressing
YES. NOW.
Cannibal Corpse Barnes era: you're 50
Cannibal Corpse Corpsegrinder era: you're 15
Thank god I'm 50
You dont like Corpsegrinder?
@@MoRaby i love Corpsegrinder, hell my favorite Cannibal song is from his era. But I'm much more a fan of when Chris Barnes was actually good.
@@Radio-Friendly-Unit @Radio Friendly Unit I love Chris Barnes pre "eeeeee" era. Six Feet Under's Haunted album is fire as well. It's refreshing to see someone who's not shitting on his entire career.
@@MoRaby the only Six Feet Under I've ever listened to was the Graveyard Classics album. I thought the covers were quite good. Especially the studio cover of TNT. But the one live video of the cover where he goes "WATCH NE EXPLEEED" is fucking hilarious no matter what lol
Corpsegrinder era you're 35 more likely
Didn’t expect Cannabis Corpse to be on here but… yeah that’s about right
If we're going with any style of death metal, then Opeth it is for me. If we're going for exclusively OSDM bands, then it's Morbid Angel but really only for their first three albums. Weird thing is that I hate slimy things. I'm like OCD about cleanliness. Make of that what you will. Lol.
Yeah I’m kinda ocd about that too
I am a restless handwasher too! And MA are my favourite.
Btw, do you like their 5th album ("Formulas...") or does it sound weird and slimey to you?
I sure do like it - it's a brootal one
These were too good!
Another suggestion for Hypocrisy: you've replaced your Ancient Aliens addiction with InfoWars, much to the dismay of... everyone.
I guess I'm a huge nerd who likes eating at the morgue without caring about my hearing 😆🔥🤟
What a wonderful combination
Anata - You're the type of person that keeps their dream alive even after is long dead
Spawn of Possession - You're the type of person that keeps their dream alive even after is long dead
Necrophagist - You're the type of person that keeps their dream alive even after is long dead
Anata is a based deep cut
I was thinking I didn’t relate to suffocation. Turns out it was Lord Worm era Cryptopsy instead. Jojo know me better than myself. 🤙
Cannibal Corpse that was because I used to wear Shorts sometimes 😊☺️💀.
Infester: you're disappointed that no other Deathmetal vocalist sounds just like Jason Oliver
Or maybe that's just me
There's always Craig Pillard (Incantation/Disma) to fall back on.
You got mee. As a Morbid Fan I can agree :DD
Obituary, Bolt Thrower and Morbid Angel were on point.
(And yes, I’m a big anime and Quake nerd, so I’d definitely be buds with Trey from Morbid Angel).
Are you into Magic the gathering too?
@@jojoplaysmusic trying to get into it..
I love several of the bands here. I'm a big fan of Dark Tranquillity (and melodeath in general), as well as Devourment (Molesting the Decapitated is best) and Visceral Disgorge (I liked Ingesting Putridity best out of VD's discography).
So apparently, I would be a caring, candid cannibal? Lol
Yeah like that German dude I guess. Lol
I chuckled numerous times. Pretty funny. I was waiting for my favorite band Cattle Decapitation
Then expect a part 2 👀
@@jojoplaysmusic I will subscribe and look out for that! Not all Cattle Decap fans are vegan, by the way (that’s too easy).
The Cannabis Corpse one was dead on, homie. 😂
@@mattbowden1981 yeah the vegan thing is a cheap shot, or at least it would be if I just said “you’re vegan”.
I have been playing RuneScape for a very long time and rarely meet people who listen to metal. I have been only trying to meet metalheads on RS for 20 years lol
This video is strangely realistic with the British metal scene. Keep doing
what you do best
The Nocturnus one made me lol really hard 😅 😂
Shit I AM the friend who says "you can talk to me, bro" 🤐
Much love bro
The Deicide one really got me!! XD
Ulcerate: you are tough but also very sensitive and you cry a lot
Now about that last one, what if Six Feet Under are your favorite COMEDY death metal act?
I gotta ponder about that one.
That was so spot on, do you work for some secret service? XD u profiled us all way too precisely, fun video
I just have a lot of knowledge
I belong in the Gothenburg death metal scene (at the gates etc) and he is totally right.
Love your videos. Keep up the great work.
Hey thank you so much! I appreciate that.
The faceless: Either you shred, or you can't even play a power chord.
for part 2 if u do one could we get infant announcement along with lorna shore and/or slaughter to prevail
I mean those are Deathcore bands. Maybe if I do a Deathcore video.
@@jojoplaysmusic alright! also i meant infant annihilator not infant announcement, my autocorrect is weird💀
Im an anims lover, AND play runescape. I should give morbid angel a listen
You definitely should.
The decapitated one made me happy
Naturally.
Cryptopsy is kinda true to a lot of bands for me.
nailed me to a T except replace Beer with Weed. Close To a World Below best all time.
To each their own. At least I was 99% right hehe.
Morbid Angel is my favorite. But the only anime I ever liked was Voltron back when I was a kid in the 80s
Works for me
THE ACCURACY OF THIS HOLY FUCK
You should do malignancy on the next one, these were gold
Thanks man, I am thinking of doing a part two.
As a demilich enjoyer, it's basically accurate
I never miss.
@@jojoplaysmusic heehee funny burps
(Although, not listed) I do like Brujeria as a Mexican death metal band option. Not only because I am proud to be Mexican-Salvadoran, but because that band is badass.
As for a Brazilian option, I like the all-woman led band Nervosa!
Lastly, as for a regular American option, I am a Deicide fan. I love the song Dead by Dawn especially. Their best album is Once Upon the Cross though.
As for the desprcirption, it was hilarious, but nah man, I don't care if anyone is a poser or not, I won't judge.
P.S. I'll try not. 😉
Vader:
You cheer at Darth Vader’s brutal scenes in Rogue One and the Obi-Wan show and anything else and declare to anyone who will pretend to listen politely that “this is why he has a death metal band named after him!”
You're wrong about at the gates man, i dont have friends LOL \m/
I don't eat pasta almost everyday at every meal... and i don't have malevolent creation tatooed on my back !
Stargazer: you also really like weather report
Let me know the bands that I missed and what they say about you.
atheist - You’re the smart ass in your friend group
Ulcerate, you think drums are better lead instrument than guitar
@@moonspawn07 that's a good one
Dying Fetus - Same deal as Misery Index. You hate the government and politics with all your being.
Aborted - You have a whole shelf full of old school horror films and you've watched every single one.
Archspire - You've come to accept that you'll never be able to play like them. And that's why you like em.
Kataklysm - You think death metal songs about spirits and ghosts are better than songs about gore and violence.
Benighted - Same deal as Aborted. You're a giant horror film fanatic.
Benediction - You would listen to other death metal bands......but you'd rather watch Doctor Who.
Mortician: You need to watch something other than spooky movies
Bouzouki is a traditional type of guitar in Greece. Pretty much all folk/traditional Greek music has bouzouki in it 😂
Guessing George Kollias showed Sanders one of those then?
You guys should watch Norsemen. Good series🤘
I'm huge immolation fan so yeah he's spot on
I got 3 No1 fave death metal bands.
1) I listen to thrash metal almost exclusively : true
2) I am a huge nerd : true
I 'll help you guess the 3rd one : I always notice the bass , can't live without a certain plant, and my top fave artist of all might be Sun Ra.
At first I thought of Cynic. But the plant thing hmm… Cephalic Carnage?
@@jojoplaysmusic ATHEIST 🙂
@@chrismuimbwa6424 makes sense
You got me at Nocturnus!!!😂😂😂
The demilich got me
But arghostlent is my favorite death metal band
I'm a Florida boy, so the first three are pretty much true of me