Life becomes so much more peaceful once you stop forcing relationships with people you're incompatible with. There's nothing wrong with them, and there's nothing wrong with you - you're simply not a good fit and that's okay. Leave on good terms and keep it moving
This right here I believe is the best approach to fix these modern day relationship issues we are currently facing especially in the black community. Both men and women are confused due to many factors like how they were raised, their beliefs, the media, and so forth. Some men expect a village girl out of a modern day slay queen and some women expect a traditional man out of a skrr skrr. A successful relationship will not happen until both parties know themselves and know who and what they are looking for. Thanks bro
@@kagisojrlesetedi7192You feel it. Your energies match, you don't have to force things & you don't have to beg someone for necessary things in a relationship My opinion
One of the biggest problem i find Penson is how people handle peer pressure. What i mean is handling the pressure of being called picky,it forces alot of people to cave in and date anyone who only fulfils half their deal breakers. Its these moments that are really the time to develop a crocodile skin....as i fully believe your long term health rests on yoyr partnering decision...thanks for the fantasiltic video
Choose the one that chooses you,when a women choose you the man has more power over her and she will respect you more bt when you go for a women who didnt choose you bro you have to compensate something like Money or Status to get her
True but remember her once you start getting money becoz us guys have the tendencies of going to look for what we couldn't have when we were not there yet
Thanks Penson for this one! Speaks directly to the tension I am facing in my relationship now. She's a super independent western-mindset lady whereas I am a laid back extremely traditional guy heavy on my masculinity and these differences just keep causing heads to butt every now and then of which long-term it is not sustainable at all. Tough decisions need to be made soon.
Love and safety is a big thing. I’m so glad you highlight it. Safety is also multifaceted-psychological safety, emotional safety, physical safety and financial safety*
Dating in your own lane does it mean, in terms of socioeconomic status or in terms of looks or both? As a person who's ugly, and poor I feel disdained about this. But I I fully get your point.
Thanks for the priceless words,to some of us we take them and use em in a practical way . Keep on speaking your truths Sir ,and the wise ears will listen,as they can build and on our life perspective view 🙏
Haaaaawu Mfo ka Mlotshwa !! You hit the nail on the head with this one. This one of them ones indeed. Hence we find ourselves in more 'Situationships' Than value driven relationships because of settling and compromising all in the name of what is suppose to be LOVE, and we don't fully know who we are yet. We are embarking on paths of discovery and re-discovery, a lot of unlearning along the journey. And I think personal value and mission could be one the core tenet's to look out for in helping to determine if the person is ''IN YOUR LANE'' or not. But kun'zima especially when it comes to matters of the heart.
The thing is our generation (mid & late twenties) isn't interested in dating because it is not worth it anymore. It is draining, distracting and procrastinating to be in a relationship especially if you're a guy and you haven't reached your goals yet.
I'm a lady and that's exactly how I feel. I tried putting myself out there and it didn't work. Ngyazi valela futhi coz there's nothing nice out there.😢
@@tsholofelojmodise6728 Well said..I know alot of good quality women that devalue themselves and are with pathetic men all in the name of love..its knda sad to be honest with you
But is it compromise if that's what you both want? Compromising would be if there is a challenge, and you have to take a shorter end of a stick for love's sake.. tension establishes compromise. My 2c worth..
"I disagree 45% with the idea of a woman seeking a stronger man. Often, these women come with significant baggage-such as four children from different relationships, relying on child grants. They seek a higher-value man to rescue them from their circumstances, but once we strong men do, they become dissatisfied and may even stray, sometimes alale negardener. As my mother once told me, 'Just because you live in a nice apartment, don't assume you're raising her standards. She might not leave you for a better man; instead, she'll go back to the same situation you found her in abuyele emkhukhwini she used to be ngoba uyinto yelo.'" With all further adieu, let’s not give advise of a perfect world but rather speaks the majority of our experiences
You are actually right. I ones saw a video of a man tracing his wife's car, he found her in a shack trying to hide under the bed! He was yelling at her on some "I'm doing everything for you, I bought you a car, you leave a mansion to come and feba in a dirty shack"
YOU MAKING A LOTTA SENSE, HOWEVER...I dont see y the money is the issue and why r we MEN alwyas trying to meet WOMEN half way. How about we only date peop[le who love Us ... Because there, she will bring value... Im not a fan of dating because I may be earning more than her, why cant we compliment eachother with what we have and build,,,,, this money this is not it,,, thats why we cheat because we eventually see, that She aint bringing value, soooo lemme bounce..... If we are only gonna look at ZAKA, honestly our generation YO BONA MASEPA... Date those u can build with,,, hake bolele ka zaka, ke bolela ka being in a relATIONSHIP.
Grootman I've got a situation here......... so it happens that there's a hun that lives in the same street that I live @ & she's made herself available in my radar...... she's 18yrs & I'm 23yrs😊 thing is that she grew up infront of me so we've seen each other grow & evolve over the years so now I've been keeping up with the hints that she's been dropping but thing is that I'm too shy to approach her coz I've never took time to learn how to talk & engage in a topic with a woman.......... I'm doing my 3rd year in Varsity (Mechanical engineering) & she's in Matric😭 I'd love to get to know her & I'd be lying if I were to say that she doesn't drive me insane........... now that I've noticed her I'm starting to feel some type of way about her so is there any advise you can offer me🙏😊
Brother, I can tell by the way you write and the fact that you are in varsity means you are a smart young man just nje uhlushwa yigwababa mele sikuphalazise😂 you remind me of myself years back This girl is already throwing her self at you like I'm here wondering what's so hard! She's already there, It's not someone you've never talked to, you are already having conversations with her, this should be the easiest task to execute. In football language this is a penalty! Now, listening to me very careful let me give you game. DO NOT I repeat DO NOT go back and start shelaring NO! Organized a date go out. If you are in Joburg you can do gold reef or car racing in Randburg or if it's a hot day go to a nearby swimming pool or a park under a tree a yoghurt some fruits nyana and chocolate. If you do take alcohol please have some few shots, it really helps to loosen you up free your mind you'll be able to say anything you wanna say to her. Lastly: over the years I've come to realise that, if a girl is really into you (which in this instance it sounds like it) even if you are not so good with words, you will still win her and if she's not into you, no matter how smooth you can be with words you won't get in. Go get your girl bro
@@bigthangz5489we don't know about that, there are people who started dating in high school went to varsity finished started working got married and lived happily ever after. There's no formula in this mjolo thing, the fact that Thina ama grootman asishaya ngestina doesn't mean the same thing will happen to him. It might work out for him
Let it go, let him be, listen to him and don't focus on his nails. I also find it challenging but I prefer to see past that and hear his views and opinions about men and is not afraid to voice his opinion without making himself an authority on everything in 2024.
Lol amaRelationships lol lmao....angisaz...haweh mah booty (bum)😋😍 cnt i find a booty dats in my lane... Mmh noted, my long term potential wife ey ill wait n c wat da universe throws n sees me as her all n b all angafiki esevithikile oh no. Ngize ngacabanga ukungena kuShembe coz i want long term companionship. Qinsile bhuti wami siyabonga..
Life becomes so much more peaceful once you stop forcing relationships with people you're incompatible with. There's nothing wrong with them, and there's nothing wrong with you - you're simply not a good fit and that's okay. Leave on good terms and keep it moving
Exactly 🎯
That was the most difficult thing for me to do in the last year 😮💨
This applies especially to friendships
Your maturity is beautiful! ❤
So true.
This right here I believe is the best approach to fix these modern day relationship issues we are currently facing especially in the black community. Both men and women are confused due to many factors like how they were raised, their beliefs, the media, and so forth. Some men expect a village girl out of a modern day slay queen and some women expect a traditional man out of a skrr skrr. A successful relationship will not happen until both parties know themselves and know who and what they are looking for. Thanks bro
A girl can be perfect in every way but these broken girls can drain the life in you 😢
Even men. Most of you are hurt. Some are bitter. lol it’s a mess for all of us.
Broken ppl are just draining .....even the rainbow nation complain
Quick question: how do you know you're compatible with someone because it seems like we get lost right there?
@@kagisojrlesetedi7192You feel it. Your energies match, you don't have to force things & you don't have to beg someone for necessary things in a relationship
My opinion
@@kagisojrlesetedi7192 shared goals.
"she might think you cool coz you got dreads"🤣🤣🤣🤣
😝
bro I caught a Stray when I heard him say that cause I have locs lol
I think I agree with you completely. Found someone in my lane. It’s perfect
One of the biggest problem i find Penson is how people handle peer pressure. What i mean is handling the pressure of being called picky,it forces alot of people to cave in and date anyone who only fulfils half their deal breakers. Its these moments that are really the time to develop a crocodile skin....as i fully believe your long term health rests on yoyr partnering decision...thanks for the fantasiltic video
It's official. I am binge watching your content 🤣🤣🤣🤣
My man, today I fully agree with every single thing that you said, if man specially can view life like this then they would be at peace.
Choose the one that chooses you,when a women choose you the man has more power over her and she will respect you more bt when you go for a women who didnt choose you bro you have to compensate something like Money or Status to get her
True but remember her once you start getting money becoz us guys have the tendencies of going to look for what we couldn't have when we were not there yet
Exactly govern where you win when a girl doesn't love you forget it I'm taking from experience
@@EltonMatheko It will be foolish of you to forget about her she will be number one over da other chicks
Thanks Penson for this one! Speaks directly to the tension I am facing in my relationship now. She's a super independent western-mindset lady whereas I am a laid back extremely traditional guy heavy on my masculinity and these differences just keep causing heads to butt every now and then of which long-term it is not sustainable at all. Tough decisions need to be made soon.
you cant turn a wolf into a house pet.
Ama midnight starrings😂😂
Love and safety is a big thing. I’m so glad you highlight it. Safety is also multifaceted-psychological safety, emotional safety, physical safety and financial safety*
Keep dropping facts brvh !! 🤝
Well said my brother thats why they say know your worth as a man, these things must come naturally
Dating in your own lane does it mean, in terms of socioeconomic status or in terms of looks or both? As a person who's ugly, and poor I feel disdained about this. But I I fully get your point.
Thanks for the priceless words,to some of us we take them and use em in a practical way . Keep on speaking your truths Sir ,and the wise ears will listen,as they can build and on our life perspective view 🙏
I have a problem.with ppl that date ppl becouse they look good next to them n they can brag about them not becouse they genuinely into them.
I agree. We submit naturally.
Great video, can't wait for the next one!!!!👏👏👏
I’ll keep dropping them!!!
Nothing but the Truth🙌🙌👏
Good video bro what you're saying is true that is what I will do it's less stressful and more effective 👊
Haaaaawu Mfo ka Mlotshwa !! You hit the nail on the head with this one. This one of them ones indeed. Hence we find ourselves in more 'Situationships' Than value driven relationships because of settling and compromising all in the name of what is suppose to be LOVE, and we don't fully know who we are yet. We are embarking on paths of discovery and re-discovery, a lot of unlearning along the journey. And I think personal value and mission could be one the core tenet's to look out for in helping to determine if the person is ''IN YOUR LANE'' or not. But kun'zima especially when it comes to matters of the heart.
DATING IS ABOUT LOVE NOT LINES OR MONEY
Men date should date their own lane. Women date in any lane.
My brother, spit!!!!!!
grown man with painted nails
😂
Yellow card!!!
a whole father of children with painted nails 😂
The thing is our generation (mid & late twenties) isn't interested in dating because it is not worth it anymore. It is draining, distracting and procrastinating to be in a relationship especially if you're a guy and you haven't reached your goals yet.
I'm a lady and that's exactly how I feel. I tried putting myself out there and it didn't work. Ngyazi valela futhi coz there's nothing nice out there.😢
Makes sense now why men my age(im 22) don't approach me, it's always the older men. I guess they feel that they are much more accomplished, idk.
I know somebody who needs to see this video.
If I send her this video, we’ll no longer be friends.
Send it! 😂😂
Same, she already thinks I shade the guy. I dont... Love isnt enough... Our parents loved us but that wasnt enough, same applies in relationships
@@tsholofelojmodise6728 "our parents loved us but that wasn't enough" damn
@@tsholofelojmodise6728 Well said..I know alot of good quality women that devalue themselves and are with pathetic men all in the name of love..its knda sad to be honest with you
But is it compromise if that's what you both want? Compromising would be if there is a challenge, and you have to take a shorter end of a stick for love's sake.. tension establishes compromise. My 2c worth..
Nothing but the truth!
"I disagree 45% with the idea of a woman seeking a stronger man. Often, these women come with significant baggage-such as four children from different relationships, relying on child grants. They seek a higher-value man to rescue them from their circumstances, but once we strong men do, they become dissatisfied and may even stray, sometimes alale negardener. As my mother once told me, 'Just because you live in a nice apartment, don't assume you're raising her standards. She might not leave you for a better man; instead, she'll go back to the same situation you found her in abuyele emkhukhwini she used to be ngoba uyinto yelo.'" With all further adieu, let’s not give advise of a perfect world but rather speaks the majority of our experiences
You are actually right. I ones saw a video of a man tracing his wife's car, he found her in a shack trying to hide under the bed! He was yelling at her on some "I'm doing everything for you, I bought you a car, you leave a mansion to come and feba in a dirty shack"
Yoh🥶🤒@@mpumimdluli5894
Sometimes I wonder where you guys find these wimen. Then again maybe I live in my own bubble. 😅
@@penelopegcina experience comes with age
@@mpumimdluli5894please send the link
YOU MAKING A LOTTA SENSE, HOWEVER...I dont see y the money is the issue and why r we MEN alwyas trying to meet WOMEN half way.
How about we only date peop[le who love Us ... Because there, she will bring value... Im not a fan of dating because I may be earning more than her, why cant we compliment eachother with what we have and build,,,,, this money this is not it,,, thats why we cheat because we eventually see, that She aint bringing value, soooo lemme bounce.....
If we are only gonna look at ZAKA, honestly our generation YO BONA MASEPA...
Date those u can build with,,, hake bolele ka zaka, ke bolela ka being in a relATIONSHIP.
Amen Penson 🙏Amen.
Stay single you'll thank me later
There is no other truth other than that, I have thought am the problem, kanki, it about understanding my lane and date within my lane
Hollup hollup painted nails ?
Guys what's going on in SA 😢
Thina ama heathens 😅😅😅😅😂😂😂
Facts!
Soooooo true 🙌🏾
Wow perfect talk
You just got new subie here🎉
7:15 needs to go viral
Siyabonga Mlotshwa, siyabonga bhuti
Grootman I've got a situation here......... so it happens that there's a hun that lives in the same street that I live @ & she's made herself available in my radar...... she's 18yrs & I'm 23yrs😊 thing is that she grew up infront of me so we've seen each other grow & evolve over the years so now I've been keeping up with the hints that she's been dropping but thing is that I'm too shy to approach her coz I've never took time to learn how to talk & engage in a topic with a woman.......... I'm doing my 3rd year in Varsity (Mechanical engineering) & she's in Matric😭 I'd love to get to know her & I'd be lying if I were to say that she doesn't drive me insane........... now that I've noticed her I'm starting to feel some type of way about her so is there any advise you can offer me🙏😊
a rich man will snatch her from u. your wife is not yet even born. focus on yo career poi.
Brother, I can tell by the way you write and the fact that you are in varsity means you are a smart young man just nje uhlushwa yigwababa mele sikuphalazise😂 you remind me of myself years back
This girl is already throwing her self at you like I'm here wondering what's so hard! She's already there, It's not someone you've never talked to, you are already having conversations with her, this should be the easiest task to execute. In football language this is a penalty!
Now, listening to me very careful let me give you game.
DO NOT I repeat DO NOT go back and start shelaring NO!
Organized a date go out. If you are in Joburg you can do gold reef or car racing in Randburg or if it's a hot day go to a nearby swimming pool or a park under a tree a yoghurt some fruits nyana and chocolate. If you do take alcohol please have some few shots, it really helps to loosen you up free your mind you'll be able to say anything you wanna say to her.
Lastly: over the years I've come to realise that, if a girl is really into you (which in this instance it sounds like it) even if you are not so good with words, you will still win her and if she's not into you, no matter how smooth you can be with words you won't get in. Go get your girl bro
@@bigthangz5489we don't know about that, there are people who started dating in high school went to varsity finished started working got married and lived happily ever after. There's no formula in this mjolo thing, the fact that Thina ama grootman asishaya ngestina doesn't mean the same thing will happen to him. It might work out for him
@@mpumimdluli5894woow, well said
Don't go for her.
Preached😅
Tell them😂😂
Bro, what I’ve seen is that women really don’t know what they want, you can be everything she thinks she wants but still feel incomplete
Great video
Must you go around asking girls salaries and the men they prefer to date to find out if you qualify, and would the ladies be honest?? 🤔
very solid advice my brother. Only problem is that usually those we are compatible with aren't necessarily what we are looking for physically 😅
This is your problem, you’re looking for looks whilst you’re incompatible. You’re still gonna cry…..
TRUTH
It's the nails for me😂👀 I'm listening to your chat my brother, but I'm curious about the nails bafo, please explain....
😂 asked myself the same thing
Let it go!! Listen to the message and let him indulge in what makes him content😊
Nails ?
Let it go, let him be, listen to him and don't focus on his nails. I also find it challenging but I prefer to see past that and hear his views and opinions about men and is not afraid to voice his opinion without making himself an authority on everything in 2024.
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Lol amaRelationships lol lmao....angisaz...haweh mah booty (bum)😋😍 cnt i find a booty dats in my lane... Mmh noted, my long term potential wife ey ill wait n c wat da universe throws n sees me as her all n b all angafiki esevithikile oh no.
Ngize ngacabanga ukungena kuShembe coz i want long term companionship.
Qinsile bhuti wami siyabonga..
THIS IS NOT AMERICA LINES AND QUEUE DONT MATTER
And you enjoy doing your nails 😂
😂😂😂
Bra why is your nails pink😮
are u colour blind?
i hear u my brother...but wassup with the nails? im not judging im just curious
So curious and confused hayi kakubi ndikule lane yasezilalini
Ithousand pho penson😅
Thina ama heathens 😅😅😅😅😂😂😂