I would add to that: -People who talk about money all the time -Wearing poorly fitted clothes -Swearing every sentence. -Someone who doesn’t at least acknowledge a waiter, Uber driver, shop assistant, etc. -Wearing sports clothes when they clearly aren’t going to the gym or playing sport. You’re right about confidence. You can tell a high status person a mile off as they command a room and you can tell they feel comfortable in their own skin. A low status person either tries way to hard to fit in or looks at the floor is if they’re embarrassed to be in public.
I’m a mom and found your channel when trying to help my 22yr old son with loafer selection. I’ve since shared these videos with him. He’s now subscribed. Keep up the great work! I wish more men would tune in. Good posture and a nice smile is high status. :)
I've watched several dozen of your videos now. It occurred to me that you're doing a real public service in offering really insightful and positive advice targeted at younger men. I'm not a young man; I'll be 60 in just a couple of months, but I see so many indicators that "young men are failing" for a variety of societal reasons. What you provide here is a very welcome and rare positive contrast to all this. Clearly you're earning a living with this, but I really see a greater good being done here, so kudos to you!
Thank you, Scott. That means a lot to me. I actually only just was able to leave my 9-5 to focus on this, and I’ll be sharing more about that journey in an upcoming video.
Agreed. I have commented on another video that I think James is providing a really valuable service. I am also in my early 60s and enjoy watching this channel.
I fully agree. I am in my late fifties and I enjoy watching him and it is great to see someone that age who still understands what style and social grace is. Thank you very much, I am looking forward to future videos.
I think well spoken - good grammar and vocabulary, no swearing - is high status along with good manners. When I encounter someone who appears low status, when they speak well and have good manners, it has more positive impact than their appearance.
I'm glad that you mentioned the fact that tattoos and piercings make people look low status. I see TONS of people at my gym, job, and out in public with very visible tattoos. It's become so trendy among the younger generation that NOT having a tattoo makes you rebellious.
Tattoos actually are a part of societies across the globe since thousands of years and for many reasons splly for identification of clans, for camouflage, to scare , to gormandize body(for women), and for military purposes(in modern world) ..otherwise in Todays’ world i do not see any good reason except for military purposes and identification (for men ) and subtle body gormandizing(for women).
I am an older single guy. Almost 60. I just wanted to say that I think your content is great. You are providing information that all young men currently need. Even I have learned a few things from your channel. This particular video was one of your best. Bravo, sir! You’re doing a great job. 👍👍
Great video once again, Sir! Another way to improve selfesteem and confidence: work as a bartender for a while. I did this in my early 20s (I'm 30 now). I was very shy and had no confidence 10 years ago. This changed quickly when I worked in a cocktail bar. You have to talk to hundreds of people every day, entertain them and make them happy. You also have to deal with disrespectful and angry people, take responsibility for your mistakes and apologize when you mess up an order. And sometimes, other than a waiter, you can and have to stand your ground against annoying customers who complain about nonsense. Bartenders have a certain standing. You're expected to be cool, confident and entertaining. If you lack confidence, this job will boost it.
I'll be 58 in eleven days and I learn a lot from your videos. Most of the time I dress casually but sometimes I like to kick it up a notch or two, and I like the ideas I get from your videos.
Not wearing ear pods all the time=high status. Constantly wearing ear pods in public tunes you out from your environment. You ought to be engaged in your environment. Be aware of the surrounding traffic, the kids nearby you who are about to rashly run out in front of it, the weird sudden loud sound to your left, the loudspeaker announcing your train is running late; not missing that important information in your environment because you're all wrapped up in your private audio world and oblivious to street life and potential danger. Also, those ear pods make you appear rude when you are inadvertently ignoring someone who is addressing you, maybe simply saying hello, or telling you that you look nice today, or trying to get your attention about something serious occurring a few feet away from you---but you miss all that because your ear pods are sending you into your own little audio world. Save the ear pods for quiet time in a safe, calm, appropriate environment, not for the street where you must be alert, or--worse--for when you're at your job.
As an ubereats driver, I dress well because some of the women working at the restaurant are cute. Making a good impression on them could lead to something romantic
One thing that I would call high status and something that I always live by is standing by and staying true to your core values and what you believe in.
Another high status thing is being well educated and knowledgeable. My father always said that if you want to have success with people, be interesting. Know a lot. Be able to tell an interesting story. So instead of watching funny videos, watch something about history, or science, or technology. It will always pay off.
You are correct. The overwhelming majority of people will judge you on your external appearance before you open your mouth or interact with them. This is what I did to ‘learn’ how to dress for myself and gain ‘status’. I wear what is comfortable. Jeans and t-shirt. I am always clean and tidy. Now, I have a ‘slight’ advantage over most very young adult guys. My parents gifted me a Day Date Rolex as a grad present. So, I walk into very high end dept stores, shops etc. Ask for items to look at and try. Initially, I got cold and negative responses. Literally no help. At the end of the session, I pull my shirt sleeve up to reveal my solid gold watch. Look at the time and thank them. I constantly did this, refining my behavior and actions until I was unconciously comfortable with social interactions where it didn’t matter how I dressed but how I carried myself. I ‘learned’ to be my own gentleman with what worked for me and my set of attributes.
A high status man participates in active listening in conversation. He does not say phrases like "I see." or "Cool." rather using "It sounds like...", "Do you mean...?" "Really?" "I'm sorry you're going through...". It shows you are actually listening and not invalidating their speaking points. Everyone appreciates feeling heard.
I loved the example you gave at the end. I always notice that sort of thing as well, those guys who make an effort even while working at a low-status job - their self respect shows. I insisted that the Chinese boy who came to live with me three years ago knowing no English take debate even though English was a second language. Now he's placing in National tournaments and his confidence has soared. Keep up the good work.
Debate team / Toastmasters! Both great ways to develop confidence. As a fellow Toastmaster, I highly recommend this to anyone looking to elevate their status. Being able to confidently join in on a conversation, start a new one, or provide a meaningful opinion in a well spoken, organized manner will always elevate your status to those around you.
Good of you to pass this along. I was in a "club" similar Toastmasters. It was one of the most edifying experiences of my life. It takes dedication & some hard work but the returns are invaluable.
I agree with you, on the issue of Tattoos- I live, and grew up in a very Upper-class, Old money area, Ascot, in Brisbane, Australia, and have been covering my ink for the past 13 years, as I wish to be taken seriously, as a local businessman. Having personally noted, as a teenager, that all the people with ink do manual labour, and, whilst, as a retired Automotive Engineer, I have never been afraid of getting my hands dirty, I have always taken care to dress well, when I'm not working, as in, covering my ink. Being aware of peoples' pre-concieved notions, as I have just illustrated, is very important.
This is an opinion I personally share but of which many do not share. This is simply my personal perception, and which has to do with grooming. I believe (in my opinion, once again) that being clean shaven at the appropriate times or just in general everyday, is a sign of appearing to be more caring of their grooming habits. Although my opinion has softened on this matter as there definitely is gentlemen out there with brilliant facial hair and that my main reason for being clean shaven is personally because I have quite uneven facial hair. Furthermore, as I plan to be a lawyer, my father has always told me to be presentable when in court as it shows respect to others present. Just my opinion on this matter, feel free to answer. Thank you.
Agree with your topic reviews. I am in South East Pennsylvania, USA. Tatoos here go by the zip code: no tats in the wealthy areas and lots of tats in the lower wealth areas. Attire: Lets say I know three guys net worth over $15M, each. When they are out for lunch w/ friends, they seem to be dressed the most plain, maybe even worn jeans. Their counterparts will be wearing brand new everything. These are the same ones who will always use a credit card, if it is not declined. Great video, thank you!
1. Body language: He knows to walk on the right side of the street, use the right door. He does not strut like he is a King, doesn't have a menacing stare, 2. Voice: Professional and polite voice to everyone he speaks to regardless of their status. Does not use a lot of slang or gets over the top anger even when frustrated,
@@CanadaFree-ce9jn No. if there's no sidewalk and have to walk on the street, you're supposed to walk FACING traffic so you can see what is coming and you can respond as necessary by getting closer to the curb (or jumping out of the way if necessary) or simply signaling your presence more visibly by an arm movement, or aiming eye-contact to the driver or cyclist. In North America, and continental Europe, drive on right, walk on left.
@@mtlicq What is your IQ? We are not talking about walking on the damn road, get it through your head. We are talking about walking on the damn sidewalk, I've said it three times now!
Good manners as taught by our parents carries one far in life,women, jobs,can Evan keep one from being arrested ! individuals that have much difficulty in life have poor or no manners DUGH !!!
A correction. About the Middle Eastern and Asian logo locos. They wear the brands because they cannot distinguish class from cost, and having logos all over its a way to distinguish themselves from their poorer compatriots.
I had done a special forces tattoo on the bicep when I was in the army. After a few years I stop wearing t-shirts and polos, not that I ever liked t-shirts too much anyway, because of people asking always about that. I start wearing shirts with chinos and Clarks deserts in every color. Now even on my boat and at the beach I wear a linen shirt with my swim trunks preferably boxer and that combination I like very much and I see that also the ladies liked it. So in total I think that army tattoo mistake did me some good eventually.
I tend not to go for logos but sometimes it’s unavoidable. If you see something you like, then enjoy it because life is too short. A true gentleman in my opinion is being your authentic self. Because if you put on the persona of a gentleman it will become obvious in the end that it isn’t really you. Definitely make effort in your personal appearance though. A clean home with nice decoration makes a person high status.
Hello Gent Z. I really like your channel and learn from one gentleman to another in your videos. I do wanna inquire on the first tip what did you mean with the ADDH comment? I'm curious to learn more. Thank you.
"pointing out low status traits may be a bit too snobbish for me....but im gonna do it anyways" lmao, i just love your detachment sometimes. And really good video with a lot of truth.
High status: do not use too shiny and big accessories, for example big golden neckchains or lots of rings. A high status person keeps their accessories simple and elegant. For instance, they minimalize their jewelery to a high quality, yet understated wristwatch and their wedding ring.
Sir, having the courage to say what has to be said is truly high status. I would add being intelligent and making and effort to enhance one's intellectual skills completes the set. Cheers!
Very true, i remember i met someone with low self esteem which is interesting because i also had it at the time but tried to communicate better. She later did the same thing to me and she told me she felt she was changing even if it was awkward for her to do so. So you can help other people while changing yourself and it can even make them feel it's possible for them too.
Agree on the Tattoos - if you get it on one arm, shoulder to elbow area, it's fine. It can be covered when needed, our can be discretly showing in the summer, when wearing a polo etc. The issue is when tattoos become overwhelming, like all over the body, neck and even worse, face area. Of course if you're a senior executive working for MS-13, it might be ok. But for most others, it's perhaps a better idea to reduce the ink!
Your list is 💯 correct I agree about Logos free walking billboards I like to buy Armani and Tom Ford suits but don’t want big logo on them to scream look how much I spend
How about manner of speech? Falling over your works, constantly interspersing “like” and other speech particles, speaking ungrammatically, and being content with a grade 9 vocabulary seems to mark one out in my view as middling to low in status, though it often accompanies other status markers that you’ve discussed here.
I've been a truck driver for 25 years. The High Status delivery guy bit was on point! I can't tell you how many truckers I see, young and older, dressing terribly and looking slovenly. It's disgraceful. I don't wear a suit to work (though I own a couple casual ones), but you can still look high status, even in just the right t- shirt (True Classic for me, plain, no graphics and perfect slim fit) and proper pants or jeans. The hygiene goes without saying; Just say no to the hoodies and baggy anything!
I’ve actually recently had more thoughts on this because of online discussions. I learned that Buccees doesn’t allow 18-wheelers in their gas stations in order to be more family friendly. I saw discussions in the comments for these posts and was surprised that many truck drivers joined in saying even THEY agreed and they dislike how gross and disrespectful truck drivers can be. They said the profession has very much lost its pride over the last decade or so.
Sometimes I wear loose cargo pants to the club, after tearing the crotch out of a couple of pairs of pants. But then, that is specific to vigorous dancing.
James, I am enjoying your videos even as a 70 year old man. I don't feel out of touch with the world in general and I do not wish to be seen as a clueless retiree. I appreciate your tips. Also, for me, I have developed a fondness for bourbon old fashioned cocktails. What is your opinion about cocktails to order as a gentleman rather than just an (American) football fan with a beer?
One thing that I think makes a man seem higher in status is listening to questions and then thinking for a moment before answering and answering is a slow and measured voice. Sam Harris frequently does this. Be unhurried and thoughtful in one's discourse. I have taken that to heart. Paying respect to one's opponents is also a classy manoeuvre. Sam Harris and Christopher Hitchens (at least in the start of debates) did this.
Wearing quality and well-cared for shoes are essential for making the best impression. Don't wear cheap shoes--people do notice and it's a dead give away of your status (or how you think of yourself). One does not need to wear expensive shoes rather quality shoes. A conservative stlye with proper care is a good investment. E.g. I've been an Allen-Edmonds fan for years--quality but reasonable pricing. There are plenty such brands out there, just look for them. Also, this is one place, especially with sneakers, where the maker puts an ostentatious, over-sized logo on the sides. Buy some good quality, attractive sneakers that aren't advertising for the maker.
I agree with pretty much everything you said. Especially the hygiene component. It sickens me how often people won't wash their hands after going to the toilet in public settings, or they will just spray water on their hands and not use soap and some don't dry their hands afterwards. One of your points I'm not fully sold on is name brand clothing or shoes. While I understand the points being made, some off my wardrobe consists of name brand clothing and shoes. But I didn't buy those items for that reason. I just liked the overall look and comfort levels of those items. It's just coincidental that they're brand items.
You walk into a store, where all the clerks are wearing the same uniform, but one person is rumpled, shirt isn't tucked in, looks like they just rolled out of bed, and the other person is groomed, clean, confident looking, clothes are pressed, whom are you going to approach first?
I consider men to look high status if they either are clean shaven or have neatly groomed short beards. Walking around with a few days of stubble or with a long bushy beard makes a man look like he doesn't care about his grooming. He looks like he just got out of bed if he doesn't shave off the stubble, and he looks like he's been stranded on a deserted island if his beard is long and out of control.
However, the US & Canada are free countries that aren’t being run like a police state. This is unlike places like Iran, Saudi Arabia, other Middle Eastern countries and North Korea
Gent Z, have you read the book Class by Paul Fussell? It's a bit dated now. But I think many of his humorous observations of American class differences in taste are still relevant.
I am a tall guy and I sometimes I find it hard to find clothes that fit so if I find pants or shirts that fit and cost more, I know they will last long.
Speaking for the "inked". Lol. For men,tattoos work best when they are earned,and reflective of authenticity. Years ago,as a young cityboy-turned-military man,I got tattoed. But even back then,I knew my life would take me into professional spaces where body art is frowned upon. So I got tattoos that are easily covered by a t-shirt. They have never been a hinderance,personally or professionally. And women are intrigued to discover them,and entranced by the stories behind them.
Agreed about the covering : 1. My Grandad had a tattoo on his arm, and when he got older, it didn't look good; 2. A chap I met once had half his face tattooed ( he claimed his dad was Maori- but I met him in New Orleans and his accent wasn't kiwi..) and admitted he could never work front of house. An opportunity cost.
That’s a wise move, Sam. Indeed, the stigma around tattoos in the workplace is definitely on its way out. But if you’re a young man on your way up, there’s no benefit to them (professionally.) As for women, there’s certainly a benefit to them. If I had tattoos I’m sure there would be some rewards 😅
Same. I have 4 tattoos that I got many years ago but are easily covered. It always saddens me a bit when I see young people with facial tattoos. They’re making life so much more difficult for themselves than needed.
@@hoozat007 facial tattoos will indeed limit your opportunities. My dad has two tattoos, one on each arm but both covered with a short sleeve. My personal reason to never get one is more down to the aesthetics and the fact that there is nothing I desire to ink on my body.
As an adult Gent with ADHD, so apparently it looks "embarrassing" if I get sucked into an activity, such as being on my phone too long. Just how my brain is wired, nothing I can do about that. I usually enjoy your video's and agree with most of your points but that was insulting.
I agree. That was insulting and degradatory. A gentleman never speaks in such ways of other's conditions. Specially when he doesn't understand. I'm glad I'm not the only fellow ADHD'er who noticed.
Years ago the manager of my real estate office told the story of how she was with a friend and was meeting a potential client. When they arrived the potential client stated that he thought the Realtors friend was the realtor and it was all because of how she was dressed. I'll never forget that.
Absolutely no logos. I myself I don't know if I push it too far I wear only one color shirts with no pocket. And if I need to wear t-shirt that it is a cheap one strictly one color without even a tiny logo or letter on it even if I get paid by a major brand to do it. What am I wearing is no negotiable except if it is something for a good purpose like a charity.
In terms of logos it can be legitimately hard to get a decent polo shirt for summer without some kind of logo even if it’s small. I get that giant logos are to be avoided but it is hard to be logo free with some items
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Expensive
Your comment about the phone and ADHD is not one of an educated person or a " Gentleman."
You can do better.
Best Wishes from Montana! M.H.
@@Mike-zw7fq I agree. That's the opposite of what a gentleman would do. For people like us with the condition is degradatory and hurtful.
i have been seeing this brand everywhere
“And if the British guy is calling you out for having bad teeth, you’ve got a problem.” Brutal. 😵
That was good!
If I had thousands of pounds my teeth would look like some Hollywood stars gob as well but the council tax needs paying along with everything else.
@@moorshound3243me too.
"If you want to be rebellious dont get tattoos." Ozzy Osbourne
Haha. I love Ozzy
spot on! I'm italian living in the UK and sometimes I feel so nonconformist when I'm in suit and tie, which doesn't make sense but it's true!
👏👏👏👏👏👏
And I am an Ozzy fan....
Good manners is always high-status.
Well said.
That’s right
Actually looking like you may be mannerly and decorous helps even more.
@@c16621like self confidence? Also making yourself you are handsome 😂
Unless you live in Yorkshire or any other part of Northern England, they're not.
High Status = Manners.
Begins with common courtesy,
and ends with sincere kindness.
Absolutely.
I would add to that:
-People who talk about money all the time
-Wearing poorly fitted clothes
-Swearing every sentence.
-Someone who doesn’t at least acknowledge a waiter, Uber driver, shop assistant, etc.
-Wearing sports clothes when they clearly aren’t going to the gym or playing sport.
You’re right about confidence. You can tell a high status person a mile off as they command a room and you can tell they feel comfortable in their own skin. A low status person either tries way to hard to fit in or looks at the floor is if they’re embarrassed to be in public.
I full agree with your points. Especially about discussions of money and not being kind to service workers.
Agreed. Money is a tool, not a virtue
I’m a mom and found your channel when trying to help my 22yr old son with loafer selection. I’ve since shared these videos with him. He’s now subscribed. Keep up the great work! I wish more men would tune in.
Good posture and a nice smile is high status. :)
I've watched several dozen of your videos now. It occurred to me that you're doing a real public service in offering really insightful and positive advice targeted at younger men. I'm not a young man; I'll be 60 in just a couple of months, but I see so many indicators that "young men are failing" for a variety of societal reasons. What you provide here is a very welcome and rare positive contrast to all this. Clearly you're earning a living with this, but I really see a greater good being done here, so kudos to you!
Thank you, Scott. That means a lot to me. I actually only just was able to leave my 9-5 to focus on this, and I’ll be sharing more about that journey in an upcoming video.
Agreed. I have commented on another video that I think James is providing a really valuable service. I am also in my early 60s and enjoy watching this channel.
I fully agree. I am in my late fifties and I enjoy watching him and it is great to see someone that age who still understands what style and social grace is. Thank you very much, I am looking forward to future videos.
I think well spoken - good grammar and vocabulary, no swearing - is high status along with good manners. When I encounter someone who appears low status, when they speak well and have good manners, it has more positive impact than their appearance.
Indiscriminate swearing is definitely low status but I would not say high status people don't swear. In my experience, at least.
I'm glad that you mentioned the fact that tattoos and piercings make people look low status. I see TONS of people at my gym, job, and out in public with very visible tattoos. It's become so trendy among the younger generation that NOT having a tattoo makes you rebellious.
Funny, I don't see tattooed individuals feeling like they need to twist arms on those not getting them. As per usual sounds like a "you" problem...
Never get a tattoo where the judge can see it. -Brian Setzer
Tattoos actually are a part of societies across the globe since thousands of years and for many reasons splly for identification of clans, for camouflage, to scare , to gormandize body(for women), and for military purposes(in modern world) ..otherwise in Todays’ world i do not see any good reason except for military purposes and identification (for men ) and subtle body gormandizing(for women).
I am an older single guy. Almost 60. I just wanted to say that I think your content is great. You are providing information that all young men currently need. Even I have learned a few things from your channel. This particular video was one of your best. Bravo, sir! You’re doing a great job. 👍👍
Just be kind and respectful to everyone. That is the highest status
Great video once again, Sir!
Another way to improve selfesteem and confidence: work as a bartender for a while.
I did this in my early 20s (I'm 30 now). I was very shy and had no confidence 10 years ago. This changed quickly when I worked in a cocktail bar.
You have to talk to hundreds of people every day, entertain them and make them happy. You also have to deal with disrespectful and angry people, take responsibility for your mistakes and apologize when you mess up an order. And sometimes, other than a waiter, you can and have to stand your ground against annoying customers who complain about nonsense.
Bartenders have a certain standing. You're expected to be cool, confident and entertaining. If you lack confidence, this job will boost it.
I’m 50… and learnt loads… my tip is don’t dress down at work if it’s smart casual! Dress up
Bro, people think I'm odd for wearing actual pajamas to bed every night, so glad to see you wearing an evening uniform!
I am an empty nester. Once my daughters hit about age 5, I had to start wearing pajamas. I still wear them at age 65. Keep up the good work, James.
I'll be 58 in eleven days and I learn a lot from your videos. Most of the time I dress casually but sometimes I like to kick it up a notch or two, and I like the ideas I get from your videos.
Not wearing ear pods all the time=high status.
Constantly wearing ear pods in public tunes you out from your environment. You ought to be engaged in your environment. Be aware of the surrounding traffic, the kids nearby you who are about to rashly run out in front of it, the weird sudden loud sound to your left, the loudspeaker announcing your train is running late; not missing that important information in your environment because you're all wrapped up in your private audio world and oblivious to street life and potential danger.
Also, those ear pods make you appear rude when you are inadvertently ignoring someone who is addressing you, maybe simply saying hello, or telling you that you look nice today, or trying to get your attention about something serious occurring a few feet away from you---but you miss all that because your ear pods are sending you into your own little audio world.
Save the ear pods for quiet time in a safe, calm, appropriate environment, not for the street where you must be alert, or--worse--for when you're at your job.
Great point!
Nothing has more impact on status than posture and manners.
As an ubereats driver, I dress well because some of the women working at the restaurant are cute. Making a good impression on them could lead to something romantic
You’re a wise man.
Always look good for the ladies. It's always fun to get a lil acknowledgement from the females.
One thing that I would call high status and something that I always live by is standing by and staying true to your core values and what you believe in.
Pride in one's work regardless of what it is.
Another high status thing is being well educated and knowledgeable. My father always said that if you want to have success with people, be interesting. Know a lot. Be able to tell an interesting story. So instead of watching funny videos, watch something about history, or science, or technology. It will always pay off.
For any gentleman to have high status he must acknowledge and appreciate the importance of having self-respect!
You are correct. The overwhelming majority of people will judge you on your external appearance before you open your mouth or interact with them. This is what I did to ‘learn’ how to dress for myself and gain ‘status’. I wear what is comfortable. Jeans and t-shirt. I am always clean and tidy. Now, I have a ‘slight’ advantage over most very young adult guys. My parents gifted me a Day Date Rolex as a grad present. So, I walk into very high end dept stores, shops etc. Ask for items to look at and try. Initially, I got cold and negative responses. Literally no help. At the end of the session, I pull my shirt sleeve up to reveal my solid gold watch. Look at the time and thank them. I constantly did this, refining my behavior and actions until I was unconciously comfortable with social interactions where it didn’t matter how I dressed but how I carried myself. I ‘learned’ to be my own gentleman with what worked for me and my set of attributes.
people are gonna judge no matter what. why should i care what they think? i don't care about status
Ohhh!! this tough love is necessary. Thank you for doing this!! Much needed
A high status man participates in active listening in conversation. He does not say phrases like "I see." or "Cool." rather using "It sounds like...", "Do you mean...?" "Really?" "I'm sorry you're going through...". It shows you are actually listening and not invalidating their speaking points. Everyone appreciates feeling heard.
i would really like a “Get ready with me” kind of video so we can see how you put yourself together so well
I loved the example you gave at the end. I always notice that sort of thing as well, those guys who make an effort even while working at a low-status job - their self respect shows. I insisted that the Chinese boy who came to live with me three years ago knowing no English take debate even though English was a second language. Now he's placing in National tournaments and his confidence has soared. Keep up the good work.
Debate team / Toastmasters! Both great ways to develop confidence. As a fellow Toastmaster, I highly recommend this to anyone looking to elevate their status. Being able to confidently join in on a conversation, start a new one, or provide a meaningful opinion in a well spoken, organized manner will always elevate your status to those around you.
Absolutely. And as you will know, total beginners are welcome in the group. It’s a fantastically encouraging environment for growth.
Good of you to pass this along. I was in a "club" similar Toastmasters. It was one of the most edifying experiences of my life. It takes dedication & some hard work but the returns are invaluable.
I agree with you, on the issue of Tattoos- I live, and grew up in a very Upper-class, Old money area, Ascot, in Brisbane, Australia, and have been covering my ink for the past 13 years, as I wish to be taken seriously, as a local businessman.
Having personally noted, as a teenager, that all the people with ink do manual labour, and, whilst, as a retired Automotive Engineer, I have never been afraid of getting my hands dirty, I have always taken care to dress well, when I'm not working, as in, covering my ink.
Being aware of peoples' pre-concieved notions, as I have just illustrated, is very important.
Definitely, good manners can go a long way.
This is an opinion I personally share but of which many do not share. This is simply my personal perception, and which has to do with grooming. I believe (in my opinion, once again) that being clean shaven at the appropriate times or just in general everyday, is a sign of appearing to be more caring of their grooming habits. Although my opinion has softened on this matter as there definitely is gentlemen out there with brilliant facial hair and that my main reason for being clean shaven is personally because I have quite uneven facial hair. Furthermore, as I plan to be a lawyer, my father has always told me to be presentable when in court as it shows respect to others present. Just my opinion on this matter, feel free to answer. Thank you.
Agree with your topic reviews. I am in South East Pennsylvania, USA. Tatoos here go by the zip code: no tats in the wealthy areas and lots of tats in the lower wealth areas. Attire: Lets say I know three guys net worth over $15M, each. When they are out for lunch w/ friends, they seem to be dressed the most plain, maybe even worn jeans. Their counterparts will be wearing brand new everything. These are the same ones who will always use a credit card, if it is not declined. Great video, thank you!
1. Body language: He knows to walk on the right side of the street, use the right door. He does not strut like he is a King, doesn't have a menacing stare, 2. Voice: Professional and polite voice to everyone he speaks to regardless of their status. Does not use a lot of slang or gets over the top anger even when frustrated,
By "right side of the street" you mean facing traffic (when there is no sidewalk), not the side with traffic coming from behind you. Right ??
@@mtlicq No. In North America we drive on the right and walk on the right.
@@CanadaFree-ce9jn No. if there's no sidewalk and have to walk on the street, you're supposed to walk FACING traffic so you can see what is coming and you can respond as necessary by getting closer to the curb (or jumping out of the way if necessary) or simply signaling your presence more visibly by an arm movement, or aiming eye-contact to the driver or cyclist. In North America, and continental Europe, drive on right, walk on left.
@@mtlicq What is your IQ? We are not talking about walking on the damn road, get it through your head. We are talking about walking on the damn sidewalk, I've said it three times now!
@@mtlicq Same in South America
Good manners.
Good manners as taught by our parents carries one far in life,women, jobs,can Evan keep one from being arrested ! individuals that have much difficulty in life have poor or no manners DUGH !!!
The most succinct way I’ve heard it illustrated:
“To be inoffensive in manner and dress”
A correction. About the Middle Eastern and Asian logo locos. They wear the brands because they cannot distinguish class from cost, and having logos all over its a way to distinguish themselves from their poorer compatriots.
I had done a special forces tattoo on the bicep when I was in the army. After a few years I stop wearing t-shirts and polos, not that I ever liked t-shirts too much anyway, because of people asking always about that.
I start wearing shirts with chinos and Clarks deserts in every color.
Now even on my boat and at the beach I wear a linen shirt with my swim trunks preferably boxer and that combination I like very much and I see that also the ladies liked it. So in total I think that army tattoo mistake did me some good eventually.
I tend not to go for logos but sometimes it’s unavoidable. If you see something you like, then enjoy it because life is too short.
A true gentleman in my opinion is being your authentic self. Because if you put on the persona of a gentleman it will become obvious in the end that it isn’t really you. Definitely make effort in your personal appearance though. A clean home with nice decoration makes a person high status.
Hate living in apartments for the sole reason of not having privacy even on the simple task of riding elevator
You're spot about the phone see it everywhere I mean everywhere
Hello Gent Z. I really like your channel and learn from one gentleman to another in your videos.
I do wanna inquire on the first tip what did you mean with the ADDH comment? I'm curious to learn more.
Thank you.
"pointing out low status traits may be a bit too snobbish for me....but im gonna do it anyways" lmao, i just love your detachment sometimes. And really good video with a lot of truth.
Speaking a greeting in a place such as an elevator with a warm smile gives the impression of confidence and good upbringing.
In the clothes area, where would you rate a classic Brando-style, leather jacket, from a status viewpoint?
High status: do not use too shiny and big accessories, for example big golden neckchains or lots of rings. A high status person keeps their accessories simple and elegant. For instance, they minimalize their jewelery to a high quality, yet understated wristwatch and their wedding ring.
Fully agree!
Sir, having the courage to say what has to be said is truly high status. I would add being intelligent and making and effort to enhance one's intellectual skills completes the set. Cheers!
I always try to keep in mind the Golden Rule. Most of the time, people will reciprocate.
Very true, i remember i met someone with low self esteem which is interesting because i also had it at the time but tried to communicate better.
She later did the same thing to me and she told me she felt she was changing even if it was awkward for her to do so.
So you can help other people while changing yourself and it can even make them feel it's possible for them too.
Good emotional regulation is high status -- staying calm when being angry would be understandable, for example.
A well fitted suit, a.wristwatch that is obviously expensive but not flashy. Always treats wait staff/service pesonnel, etc with coutesy.
Agree on the Tattoos - if you get it on one arm, shoulder to elbow area, it's fine. It can be covered when needed, our can be discretly showing in the summer, when wearing a polo etc. The issue is when tattoos become overwhelming, like all over the body, neck and even worse, face area. Of course if you're a senior executive working for MS-13, it might be ok. But for most others, it's perhaps a better idea to reduce the ink!
Your list is 💯 correct
I agree about Logos free walking billboards
I like to buy Armani and Tom Ford suits but don’t want big logo on them to scream look how much I spend
Logo loco was everywhere in Italy from 90's to early 2000's
It sounds as if you and Emily Post or similar etiquette organizations would get along splendidly. You share the same values.
Low status: Obsessing over looking "high status"
Agree
Exactly. Its not about how you dress. Its about the character and your treatment towards others. Have a great day
Hard agree here
@@mr.zooomyno you need to have both. Lets be real we ALL judge people over their appearance.
So what is high status?
How about manner of speech? Falling over your works, constantly interspersing “like” and other speech particles, speaking ungrammatically, and being content with a grade 9 vocabulary seems to mark one out in my view as middling to low in status, though it often accompanies other status markers that you’ve discussed here.
I've been a truck driver for 25 years. The High Status delivery guy bit was on point! I can't tell you how many truckers I see, young and older, dressing terribly and looking slovenly. It's disgraceful. I don't wear a suit to work (though I own a couple casual ones), but you can still look high status, even in just the right t- shirt (True Classic for me, plain, no graphics and perfect slim fit) and proper pants or jeans. The hygiene goes without saying; Just say no to the hoodies and baggy anything!
I’ve actually recently had more thoughts on this because of online discussions. I learned that Buccees doesn’t allow 18-wheelers in their gas stations in order to be more family friendly. I saw discussions in the comments for these posts and was surprised that many truck drivers joined in saying even THEY agreed and they dislike how gross and disrespectful truck drivers can be. They said the profession has very much lost its pride over the last decade or so.
i don't see how wearing a hoodie and wearing baggy clothes is dressing terribly
Sometimes I wear loose cargo pants to the club, after tearing the crotch out of a couple of pairs of pants. But then, that is specific to vigorous dancing.
Courtesy to delivery people, to severs in restaurants, and to door personnel is foundational to appearing higher-status.
Classy smelling cologne applied just right & not repel. Also a watch!
James, I am enjoying your videos even as a 70 year old man. I don't feel out of touch with the world in general and I do not wish to be seen as a clueless retiree. I appreciate your tips. Also, for me, I have developed a fondness for bourbon old fashioned cocktails. What is your opinion about cocktails to order as a gentleman rather than just an (American) football fan with a beer?
One thing that I think makes a man seem higher in status is listening to questions and then thinking for a moment before answering and answering is a slow and measured voice. Sam Harris frequently does this. Be unhurried and thoughtful in one's discourse. I have taken that to heart. Paying respect to one's opponents is also a classy manoeuvre. Sam Harris and Christopher Hitchens (at least in the start of debates) did this.
You sir, sold me Tiege Hanley by simply mentioning it by your incredible voice
How well do they ship to Malaysia?
@@Danielscuriosity2 I’m glad to hear it. Yes, Tiege ships to many international countries. I’m sure you will love using their products
Wearing quality and well-cared for shoes are essential for making the best impression. Don't wear cheap shoes--people do notice and it's a dead give away of your status (or how you think of yourself). One does not need to wear expensive shoes rather quality shoes. A conservative stlye with proper care is a good investment. E.g. I've been an Allen-Edmonds fan for years--quality but reasonable pricing. There are plenty such brands out there, just look for them. Also, this is one place, especially with sneakers, where the maker puts an ostentatious, over-sized logo on the sides. Buy some good quality, attractive sneakers that aren't advertising for the maker.
Yes sir, I love my Edmonds oxfords. Most others in my office are wearing sneakers.
My shoes (dress) are Florsheim because the leather soles will slide nicely on the dance floor. This has become important as my knees age . 😉
I agree with pretty much everything you said. Especially the hygiene component. It sickens me how often people won't wash their hands after going to the toilet in public settings, or they will just spray water on their hands and not use soap and some don't dry their hands afterwards.
One of your points I'm not fully sold on is name brand clothing or shoes. While I understand the points being made, some off my wardrobe consists of name brand clothing and shoes. But I didn't buy those items for that reason. I just liked the overall look and comfort levels of those items.
It's just coincidental that they're brand items.
Physical shape. You can wear the cheapest T-shirt and look better than someone with a dad bod in an expensive shirt
Polite, grammatically correct language spoken in a clear, understandable volume wins lots of points.
Great video. I hope many young people will learn from you...
You walk into a store, where all the clerks are wearing the same uniform, but one person is rumpled, shirt isn't tucked in, looks like they just rolled out of bed, and the other person is groomed, clean, confident looking, clothes are pressed, whom are you going to approach first?
Absolutely. It’s human nature.
untucked shirt guy
@@HYPERxSONICxFANx2012 Yeah, that too.
@@thechairman74 i'm approaching the untucked shirt guy first
Makes little sense to present yourself as a low quality person when with little effort you could do the opposite.
Every word you speak is absolute truth
I consider men to look high status if they either are clean shaven or have neatly groomed short beards. Walking around with a few days of stubble or with a long bushy beard makes a man look like he doesn't care about his grooming. He looks like he just got out of bed if he doesn't shave off the stubble, and he looks like he's been stranded on a deserted island if his beard is long and out of control.
I hate seeing phones in people’s hand so much, I bought a watch as to not even glance at it (phone) for the time.
good manners is never out of fashion
I would add to that:
- being an affiliate on TH-cam
- taking sponsers from "high status" Influencers
My cousin was a coal miner in Pitson PA
He would go to work in a white suit
And come home in it
SPOTLESS!
Im just shocked the british word for hot dog is still "hot dog" haha
Joking aside- debat or in my case mock trail is a game changer.
Also college or amateur theatre. Being onstage becomes addicting . . .
Ink error, yeah i can relate all people i know nowadays all of them have tattoos, it more rare to meet people without then with a tattoo.
I regret mine so much. I was a young punk so I have deliberately shoddy looking tattoos. I always wear sleeves now. Even in the hottest weather
The high status and confident man always wears a watch.
Not really
@@LittleTimmyO
@@TheCrusher72 lol because I’m not agreeable?
@@LittleTimmyO No, because you are in the Air Force.
A pocket watch works for me and of course there's always my phone, yea?...................................................................
Gent Z, always the perfect reference for that “provincial financial advisor” chic.
Mr. Gent Z, thanks for sharing this informative vid. In the US, I wish we could stop seeing so many Women with tattoos from their neck to their feet.
However, the US & Canada are free countries that aren’t being run like a police state. This is unlike places like Iran, Saudi Arabia, other Middle Eastern countries and North Korea
Gent Z, have you read the book Class by Paul Fussell? It's a bit dated now. But I think many of his humorous observations of American class differences in taste are still relevant.
A good book, except for the (unnecessary) last chapter.
I am a tall guy and I sometimes I find it hard to find clothes that fit so if I find pants or shirts that fit and cost more, I know they will last long.
Bad manners, lack of education and culture and aggresivity are definitively symbol of low status.
Also caring so much about status.
Excellent advice.... Thanks for sharing this....
Speaking for the "inked". Lol.
For men,tattoos work best when they are earned,and reflective of authenticity.
Years ago,as a young cityboy-turned-military man,I got tattoed. But even back then,I knew my life would take me into professional spaces where body art is frowned upon.
So I got tattoos that are easily covered by a t-shirt.
They have never been a hinderance,personally or professionally. And women are intrigued to discover them,and entranced by the stories behind them.
Agreed about the covering :
1. My Grandad had a tattoo on his arm, and when he got older, it didn't look good;
2. A chap I met once had half his face tattooed ( he claimed his dad was Maori- but I met him in New Orleans and his accent wasn't kiwi..) and admitted he could never work front of house. An opportunity cost.
That’s a wise move, Sam. Indeed, the stigma around tattoos in the workplace is definitely on its way out. But if you’re a young man on your way up, there’s no benefit to them (professionally.) As for women, there’s certainly a benefit to them. If I had tattoos I’m sure there would be some rewards 😅
Same. I have 4 tattoos that I got many years ago but are easily covered. It always saddens me a bit when I see young people with facial tattoos. They’re making life so much more difficult for themselves than needed.
@@hoozat007 facial tattoos will indeed limit your opportunities. My dad has two tattoos, one on each arm but both covered with a short sleeve. My personal reason to never get one is more down to the aesthetics and the fact that there is nothing I desire to ink on my body.
As an adult Gent with ADHD, so apparently it looks "embarrassing" if I get sucked into an activity, such as being on my phone too long. Just how my brain is wired, nothing I can do about that. I usually enjoy your video's and agree with most of your points but that was insulting.
I agree. That was insulting and degradatory. A gentleman never speaks in such ways of other's conditions. Specially when he doesn't understand.
I'm glad I'm not the only fellow ADHD'er who noticed.
Years ago the manager of my real estate office told the story of how she was with a friend and was meeting a potential client. When they arrived the potential client stated that he thought the Realtors friend was the realtor and it was all because of how she was dressed. I'll never forget that.
I still love this tie/square combo
Thank you. Both from Fort Belvedere. I don’t earn any commission from them but the links are in the description if you want to check them out.
Doing for someone who won’t be able to return the favor, is high status.
Absolutely no logos. I myself I don't know if I push it too far I wear only one color shirts with no pocket. And if I need to wear t-shirt that it is a cheap one strictly one color without even a tiny logo or letter on it even if I get paid by a major brand to do it. What am I wearing is no negotiable except if it is something for a good purpose like a charity.
Wearing suits in formal occasions clearly make you look classy
Being a good listener
Ha! Not sure I would consider a full time You Tuber one of high status!
I don't know what Status is and how it can be low or high from what you told here. I think you are speaking about self-respect and basic discipline.
posture and their "forward look", i think men that walk with a purpose - have purpose, and thus I am more attentive to them
In terms of logos it can be legitimately hard to get a decent polo shirt for summer without some kind of logo even if it’s small. I get that giant logos are to be avoided but it is hard to be logo free with some items
I totally agree with no tattoos and piercings. They've always screamed low status to me. I can't understand why everybody wants them now.
They 're just unthinkingly following the herd.
Manicured finger nails = high status 😊
Good posture = confidence
This is correct. I always walk tall and move deliberately. Women want the D wherever I go.
Great Video 💯