Too Emotionally Exhausted to Make Decluttering Decisions?
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 27 ก.ย. 2024
- There are SO many decisions to make on a daily basis these days, so the thought of making decluttering decisions is overwhelming. It feels easier to just leave the clutter than to deal with it. A lot of us just don't have any emotional energy left to deal with anything that doesn't absolutely have to be done. BUT, good news! The first three steps of my decluttering process are decision-free! You can make decluttering progress (not finish) without making any decisions or expending any emotional energy.
My books: www.aslobcomes...
The Take Your House Back course is open for registration right now! takeyourhouseback.com
My wish for anyone experiencing emotional exhaustion is that you know just doing ANYTHING is a win, a real victory, when you're feeling that way!
Even if you 'just' get rid of some obvious trash, that's TERRIFIC and you need to give yourself credit.
I did that today! Thanks for the reminder and virtual cheering on! I took out some trash and recycling and did the laundry. Yay!
Thank you
You are the FIRST person that has ever taught a way of decluttering that WORKS for me!!!! Thank you, Dana. I devoured both your books, and I use your videos to stay in the right mindset.
So we're in the process of trying to move.. so I am going through everything before I start packing. Yesterday I woke up at 2:30 in the morning and could not go back to sleep. So I was laying awake thinking about how to get my six boys on board with the process of decluttering because they get so overwhelmed when I say we need to get rid of some things. I came up with TOAD! Based on your process!
T •trash
O •obvious
A • away
D •donate
🐸 Wish me luck!! 😆❤️
Thank you for this today as I sit crying decluttering photos of my boys when they were young and my late husband. Feeling guilty of the clutter that my husband had to live with most of his life as I was too emotionally exhausted to deal with it being sick myself with young kids. I can give myself grace for doing what I could and only making things better. What would have been an upsetting day today turned around to a day where I can power through making my house better. Your words helped so much. ❤️
Hang in there!
Yes to giving yourself grace. Yes to bring kind to yourself. And yes to honesty. You’ll get there. One step at a time.
Just watched the Sparking Joy on Netflix OMG WoW 🤩 I feel so motivated+inspired
motispired 😌 ahhhh
I have been going through photos. I am 60, raised by immigrant parents so I have no relatives near me. My parents and only brother have all died. I have tons of pictures that I am throwing away because I don't know who they are, the photos have no meaning to me and will be a mystery to my kids. So why do I feel guilty??
@@kevinanddeb8829, release yourself from the guilt. I’ve come to the realization that even my own kids won’t care about my photos of my college friends or work friends as they never knew them. I’m keeping them in a box marked toss upon my passing so I can enjoy them as my memories, but my children know that they are not important for them to keep. I did put pictures with myself in them in a photo box marked with my name so they can see or show their kids what I looked like throughout my life. I do know the guilt though. I’m throwing away pictures that my husband took of people I don’t know either. It is hard, but either I do it or leave it to my kids to do. Grief is hard when it happens. This is my gift to my kids when I go.
the 'take it there now' directive is life-changing
I needed this video!!! I am so emotionally exhausted. 7 months pregnant, two young kids starting school again , one starting preschool and I am trying to declutter my arts and crafts room to turn into a new bedroom. It’s so much!!! Often I just close the door and avoid. Yesterday I went through so much paper in one of these giant bins you might use for cloths. It’s huge! All I did was throw away trash and put aside items that didn’t belong there. If I got tired I just thought of your voice and said, don’t make decisions, just take out trash. I completed that bin! I didn’t make decisions, I just threw out stuff and put stuff where it belonged. Hearing your video tonight really encouraged me that I made progress and Its ok that it’s not completely done and perfect. I didn’t fail at decluttering. It is better off. I used to make piles and it was overwhelming and often I didn’t finish. I am such a perfectionist too. So it’s hard to stop and tell myself good job for throwing out trash and relocating. Thanks for reminding us all that it is good and it is progress. We are better off!
Thank you for the "judgy voice" that you used in the "WHO would have TRASH in their KITCHEN DRAWER?" line. It sounds exactly like my judgy aunt whose voice I hear in my head. It's just so nice to know that I'm not alone in my struggle. Bless you!!
I like that you have a dirty pan on the stove. It helps us know that things don't have to be perfect to start decluttering
This is perfect. Emotional overwhelm and fatigue are real issues for me at this point, and I feel worse when I can’t get house stuff done. To be able to do these things without stirring up any additional “stuff” that projects like decluttering can is just what I needed right now. Thank you for the practical advice for those of us who are basically too fried to think right now!
I couldn't agree more with all of this.
Absolutely.....
Praying that God will comfort you and give you peace!
Don’t ever stop doing these videos! I use your phrase, one hour better, all the time, even when I was weeding today
The comments at the end made me laugh out loud!!
I need to laugh since my husband died in April followed by 3 more dear ones.
Your deep sighs remind me of what my massage therapist and acupuncturist told me while on their tables, "that sigh is a breakthrough of progress "
Thank you, Dana for your repeated advice and making me laugh.
I have both of your books and a new follower who thinks you live with us.
Love you!
i’m so sorry for your loss. it must be extremely painful times for you
🕊🤍
The beauty of this TH-cam presentation is the bringing to light of the underlying issues that impact decluttering and organizing. Thank you, thank you, thank you, Dana.
Thank you for validating that emotional exhaustion can make me feel drained and unable to take on decluttering
Thanks for addressing a real topic that is so often ignored and giving a doable solution. Appreciate!
Thanks to your steps, I can absolutely choose what to throw away when emotionally exhausted. Unfortunately, I cannot get off the couch when emotionally exhausted. I do look around the room and identify a million easy things to get rid of later.
I'll say for the most part I try to be organized. But, I have gone through the phase you are describing. Everything overwhelmed me and I could not get motivated. The thing is, you can see all the things that need doing and that compounds your stress. So, starting slow is still a start, progress is progress.
Soooooo true! The same applies to those struggling with mental health, physical difficulties, or lack of physical energy. Thanks Dana!
Oh my goodness! Yes! My whole life, whenever I hit an emotional wall, it's like everything productive and creative in me stops. Making decisions is too much. Focusing on decluttering a drawer completely would be beyond my capacity. But to approach it with the intention of just making it better, even a little bit...I might be able to do that even when I've hit that emotional/mental wall. Thank you , Dana!
I'm with you, I have tended to just go distract myself or take a nap/
Obviously a southerner, "uh, one of those snow things" no one in my area would ever hesitate over that word! 🤣 great videos, always so encouraging!
LOL AMEN to that from a New Englander!
This was so on point for me for such a different reason than probably many people. I'm 32 weeks pregnant, nesting instincts are pretty REAL, and yet I don't have any emotional energy to do it. So this was really awesome.
Also, hugely appreciated the sass here. That made me happy. 😊😅
Dana, thank you for this! My home is getting so out of hand. I try, but like you say, it is not easy these days. The strangest thing is when I do make some declutter progress, instead of feeling energized or proud of myself, I'm feeling shame that I hadn't taken care of it sooner. I kinda hate to even look at the cleaner space. Talk about a "no win" - I realize it's the times, but part of what's so heavy right now. Thank you for all you do!!
Ugh, I've been having this reaction too when I'm finally able to get something done. 🥴 I'm trying to be better about giving myself a break, but it's hard.
Can say ur just amazing. Goin to use ur getting rid of clutter ideas on my vacation. Mager hoarder here. I refer to our room as hoarders paradise. We are beyond exhausted with our clutter. Pray for me. Because I will definitely need it. My family deserves a cleaner, less cluttered home
I have to be real, when I first saw some of your videos I was taken back cuz they weren't the "typically perfectly cleaning videos", however as I'm going thru the Take Your House Back and seeing more of your videos, I truly appreciate you and your style of teaching and decluttering methods. Your methods truly are for us regular people and makes it easier to obtain a decluttered house without killing yourself or hating your family. Thank you so much for these videos. You really are making a positive impact in people s lives.
Dana, you are so funny... thank you for the laughs. I really envy people that have all this time at home. I have the opposite problem, I work in the medical field and it's been nothing but work, work, work. Vacations are denied... instead we have to work overtime. I can't get anything done at home. I'm so exhausted
OMG. I have a kitchen drawer that looks exactly like this!! (And many other cluttered places....😵💫...) Thanks for all you do, especially the emotional support and strategies! This is one of my favorite videos - hilarious and poignant at the same time!
Thank you so much for this! I'm in the process of decluttering a huge bag of miscellaneous things(and my whole house). Some of which are dated the year my mom got sick and the year after, when she passed. I spent those years mostly taking care of her, grieving and not decluttering like I usually do. I was getting anxious about decluttering it because I was embarrassed I let my clutter get so bad. So I took a YT break and came across your channel. After watching this, I now have the strength to continue. Again, thank you! Peace and blessings to you and everyone.🙏🏼
First video I have watched from your channel! I found you from Cas and Dawn’s TH-cam channels. You make me laugh with your impressions and give me motivation, especially with the duh donations👏🏻 looking forward to learning more from you.
Edit: I just filled a HUGE box with duh donations!!
Just the decision to take the trash out of the drawer can sometimes overwhelm me...honestly have learned to put things where they belong now that I've minimalized my home...great video
Hi Dana, You inspired me to tackle the "second drawer from the bottom" in my kitchen that has been on my TO DO list for at least a year, It contains thimgs I DO use occasionally. The drawer was full. So, I put a few things in a better place, had to rethink my pie making items and a few other things and decided to donate them. I had a bunch of folded or wadded up paper towels in there (?) as trash. It wasn't as horible a job as I expected! My drawer is actually finished now and looks so nice. Thank you SO MUCH! From: Judy (This is my son's tablet. He told me not to send Comments.....)
Great video for us visual learners!! I actually just made a very visible space in my bedroom “better” by removing trash and duh clutter and tidying up a bit. My husband saw it and loved it! I know it needs a deeper dive but it greatly improved the feel of the bedroom and it only took about 20 min with no emotional decisions. Thank you for all of your helpful tips Dana!! 💕
You are great, our family loves to watch these videos. Also - that cast iron with the celery in it, sitting on the stove is awesome. Thanks for letting us join your real life.
Reid, if you are suggesting your mom tackle a drawer, does that mean you are moving into a directorial role? Good job, by the way!
Amen!! Every word is so true!! “Better than it was” was an eye opener!! Thank you!!
This has come at the perfect time for me as I anticipate a kitchen clear out. Removing the out of place and duh items first should make this job less stressful for me.
"Better IS Good!" Doesn't matter how MUCH, just Better!! One load of laundry, one piece of trash, one article of clothing put away, one weed pulled, etc! Thank you for such a SIMPLE, but effective quote to live by!! Keep up the good work Dana! You are not alone! "Normal" is ONLY a setting on your drying, right!? I go between you, Dawn & Cass everyday!! Declutter at the speed of life- LOVED! You three have truly made me realize I am not alone with my tendencies! It's like looking in the mirror the way I relate to you you!- but NOT, because I just need to GET STARTED. I have the vision, but it's so hard to get there on your own. I need you 3 to come visit me and my accumulations of 15 yrs! I appreciate and understand the concept of momentum, but just to get STARTED! UGH!
THIS!!! This is perfect! I need this kind of thinking! The only thing I have to change is the 'take it there now,' because I have no ability problems and cannot do that. Therefore, I would need small baskets to put things in that go to other rooms, and even if I have to just put a basket in the room it goes to and deal with it when I get to that room, it's better than having it out of place in another area of the house!
No 'no ability,' although it sometimes seems like that, lol! It was supposed to say mobility.
@@suzannekemp8985 Do You know that you can edit your comment by clicking on the three little dots to the right?
@@cynthiafisher9907 thanks
Thank you for this video. We just survived Hurricane Ida and there is NO extra energy for anything but finding gas for generators, keeping clean, and having food cooked. I only thought I was stressed before. But you’ve given me hope that I can do something small every day to help my piece of mind. I know a big declutter isn’t going to be on the to do list for awhile but I feel like I can do steps 1-3 in every room! TY for being normal! 💗
You are a genius, Dana! I just spent like 10 mins doing this process in 2 kitchen drawers & actually got rid of trash &donatables!!! & no mess! Thank you sooo very much!! 💕
I was just telling some friends about you today. Earlier this year i found you, you speak my language . Its been really helpful,and ive been able to get my hubs on board. Still have a long way to go,but small chunks have made a big difference.
You’re a blessing. Such a funny, wonderful person with a ton of empathy and courage. Who else dares to be that open and vulnerable in public? Thank you, keep up the great work.
Reading through the comments...yep, these are my peeps. :)
I put this video on loop so it can keep playing while I sort through my Moms recipes. It is about the hardest things I have to go through since she passed away. Emotional is the key word. This is helping me to really start on this. Thank you Dana from the bottom of my heart!
This was a great demonstration! Yes, I have a house full of emotional possessions, my job requires a lot of emotional outflow, and life is complicated. At least I can clean and declutter unemotionally! The results are truly uplifting emotionally. What a cycle. Thanks for helping me improve my space too. 🙏❤🌻
Hello Dana, I just love your way of thinking. I would have put the measuring cups back in the nest then I would have put the serving spoons together and then I would have all the handles facing the same direction and then I would quit.💕NonnaGrace
You must be a Cricket or aBee Clutterbug. I get it. Looking at her drawer made me want to separate and categorize her utensils. Just to make them easier to find and use.
@@KSLassie457 Yes! Why not have a utensil container on the counter where you can just grab what you need?
@@cynthiafisher9907 9
Thanks for sharing this! I have been procrastinating decluttering because I have felt overwhelmed. Parts of my home look like a bomb went off it! Yesterday, I thought I would start cleaning out a kitchen drawer. I did exactly as you did and felt so accomplished, I went on to clear out 5 drawers!
This made me feel happy and encouraged 👍. I continued to declutter my bureau drawers. I got rid of so much stuff that I haven’t worn in years. Today, I went to the trunk of my car and took out hundreds of shopping bags. I also consolidated 15 bags of bags hanging in my garage. By watching your videos I am finding the momentum to continue 👍😀
Thanks 😊
I love watching you go through your stuff and applying the principles you're teaching.
That was SO good. I think the emotional exhaustion of the last Year and a half has really taken many of us by surprise. Great suggestions! Thank you!!
OMG, LOVE YOUR EARRINGS!
I so love your 1st 3 steps - makes cleaning while depressed so very helpful - AND I also love that you have a pan full of food just being real and raw (like you are) and your whole confidence in who you are, brings me so much joy to my heart!
Dana, you are the OG!!!! Thank you and LOVE seeing your new videos every week! They get me going!!! Better is BETTER!!!
I love this. Thank you! While I feel better about walking away from an unfinished project now (thanks to your no-mess method), I’ve never even thought of walking into a space with the intent of not making any emotional decisions…just giving permission from the start to only grab trash & duh clutter. I’ve thought about it on a larger scale (like going around the house with the goal of filling a trash bag), but on something as small as a single drawer or bin, I’ve always felt I need to do it in completion.
Thank you for the permission to make things easier on ourselves ❤️
We just emptied my parents home and I am flooded with too much stuff! It's all too emotional on top of all my previous existing clutter I needed to go through.
Thank you for this!
One step at a time.
One drawer at a time.
One box at a time.
It is enough, and it's progress.
Desperately needed to see this today, will be watching again and again.
This really hit home today!!! I've never been so overwhelmed in my life...and I've been through "stuff" in the past...but NOTHING compared to now!!!! Thank you for being such a "Breath of Fresh Air" in such a time of turmoil!!! And; Hey by the way!!!! I just read "How to Manage your Home Without Losing Your Mind" and Decluttering At The Speed of Life!!!" I didn't want to put them down!!!! For many decades I couldn't get my house(and therefore my life) under control!!! I'm happy to say; I had already been implementing many of these processes (even before watching you on TH-cam!) and you gave me so much conformation that I am getting it right!!! PHEW!!! My house (and even "most" of my closets, cupboards, and drawers are "Company ready!" ;) ) Thank you for your continued encouragement!!!!! And.....You're Funny!!! ;)
So true. Thanks for making this video. It's exactly what I needed to hear as I'm trying to plan a wedding and feeling pressure from the fam to make it happen. I just can't anymore. I don't want to make big decisions at this time. We're all indoors now, finding new and different ways to do mundane things, being super conscious about health. It's not that easy to declutter or make decisions at this time. Planning a wedding is stressful without a pandemic. Decluttering is stressful enough when you do have energy. Oh and the "pen" you tossed is the cover for a meat thermometer :) And I love how you say "that doesn't require any emotions!" Haha
You say it often about leaving a space better! My motto for SEVERAL years now is “it’s better than it was” that motto applies in SOOOO many areas!! Thanks for all you do!
My ice pick will always have a place in my house. It's sharp, dangerous, and handy. Just like a good man!
These tips are so good, I have chronic illness, pain and fatigue, and it seem that everything has emotions attached currently. It's so difficult to move sometimes, so often I get as far as the first step -rubbish- and have to stop, but you know what? It's better. Not perfect, but better, and you can see the difference. If only I knew how to carry on! 😊💕🦋
This video & your rules makes me feel like I can get some things done!!! Because it’s a more natural process. ☀️☀️☀️
Appreciating this approach, once again. I am decluttering and cleaning and organizing spots here and there in my apartment right now! Very pleased with my defrosted and clean refrigerator, the majority of my Christmas decorations are ready to be taken upstairs to the attic… my scarves & shawls are going to get a new home. They are on my bed right now, which doesn’t exactly fit with your policy of only better, but they were in two drawers that just were not made for scarves, and I do have space in my wardrobe. So I’m going to find a box that fits and organize them in a way that’s easier to access and see and it’s nicer for the scarves!
You did a wonderful job addressing this issue. Many times you become unaware of the blanket of stress that is covering you. Well done!
Dana, you are a blessing. Your happy, funny, non judgmental attitude is really freeing. May God bless you friend.🌹
thank you Dana, I think this has made the penny drop that even the smallest about of progress - removing rubbish from one place is progress. I get so embroiled in needing to be perfect, I become paralysed with overwhelm. Just listening to this make me realise that even the smallest of steps can make a difference. Many blessings x
That thing you thought was a pen and you threw it away is the holder for your meat thermometer. It has a clip for your 'chef's jacket" chest pocket. I leave mine on because the thermometer works all along the length, not just the tip. It's more protected with the holder on it.
I love seeing how you are applying your Container Concept to your own home.
My favorite part was seeing/hearing the face and noise that I will inevitably make, and that's where I will now know to pull back from making any more decisions.
I needed your voice just now. I'm trying to tackle my sewing room. I have too much fabric, for starters, then it's also our guest room. BUT with the current lack of guest opportunities, it's been a dumping ground. I've decided one big bin of "fabric to put away" is better than little colonies of fabric all over the room. Ditto with yarn. Everything else I'm really trying to deal with but I got derailed by a small box of my mom's stuff. I already winnowed it down to that small box, but now? So what do you DO with the emotional stuff? No way I can do it now, & that's ok, but where do I put it? How do I keep processing the not hard stuff that is mixed in with the hard stuff? Deep breath. I'm heading back in there. You and a dose of Dr Pepper have given me a nudge. I think I'll just throw a quilt over any mom stuff for now. Not a great solution, but I can keep moving forward. Thanks for getting it.
Thank you for being you, Dana. I was thinking the same thing. Too many decisions to make right now over the simplistic of things.
Every video just makes me ❤ you MORE!!😁 Thank you for the humor I NEED to get through the day & the clutter 😊
That drawer gave me heavy anxiety.
About sharp things, I just hate playing Drawer Roulette!! Rummaging around in a drawer and inadvertently slitting open my hand is HORRID!!!!
I so ❤ and appreciate your approach! Better, better, better!!
I just found you! You’re such an awesome lady! That “thinger” you said you didn’t know what it is is the sheath to a cooking thermometer, it has a clip on it so you can clip it to your apron bib while cooking/bbq-ing. My drawer looked like yours until my drawer broke and had them all rebuilt. One of the tricks I use is to rearrange the furniture then you’re forced to deep clean/purge. And also invite people over… got to clean the house. Lol. Hugs! You’re awesome!
I have been getting rid of things but I have 20 yrs to declutter. I have such a long way to go! Thank you for your inspiration. I find it easier to take everything out of the drawer then put it back. I can let items go and sometimes find doubles.
I'm emotionally exhausted just looking at that drawer.
Dana, I love watching you because I can totally relate to your safety concerns and you also get grossed out by the same types of things that I do. Even though my house can get really messy, I don’t like to use things that I consider dirty. Some people have the 5 second rule that if they drop something on the floor they will pick it up and use it or in some cases eat it. Not me. I definitely have to wash it off or throw it out, if it’s something that can’t be washed.
I love the leftover eggs just sitting on the stove in the pan the whole time 😂 you are my kind😂😂😂
Thank you for the understanding, the humor, and mostly, the relief!
I just got both of your books for my birthday and am in the midst of reading them. This video is perfect as a visual step by step to go with the explanations in the book. I just need to put it all together and a BETTER house I will have. Thank you!
Thank you! I was feeling overwhelmed this morning & then I heard your voice telling me to start with the trash. And it really works!
Thanks for this video Dana! I went through a kitchen drawer and just compiled all the produce bags I’ve collected over the years into one! Easy to grab for counter composting without looking like a hot mess 😆
Kudos to the editor. 👍
May I say that I almost want to fast forward to the very end of each video just to see Reid's comments?!? Yes, I LOVE the contents which are super helpful but really, the endings are so great!! Usually, I skip over the intros & credits/endings but not yours!! GREAT JOB, Mom & Son Team!! Such love!!
I'm so happy to see a drawer exactly like mine!
Thank you, Dana K White! I am getting ready to travel and you can bet your booty I am saying that in my head. AND I feel what you're saying SO much! It's just great to see this fresh vid on the very topic of my not-fully-decluttered-but-want-to-be-so-much-more-to-feel-human existence right now.
Yes, thank you! This video was right on for me. I just keep telling myself this decluttering is for the good of my family and myself. But mentally this is so stressful for me. You are so right, emotionally exhausting 👍
I love your videos! They help me get going with overwhelming tasks 💖
Such a great video!!! Excellent motivation to make some progress even when you are worn out!!!
I like you Dana for more than one reason. You remind me of my daughter who easily gets overwhelmed, or maybe not easily, but often. She's a good mom and wife, but life ain't easy, right?! I appreciate your soft approach. I'm overwrought right now, too, so I need to be nice to myself and work easy.
I knew when I read the title that this was for me. The video didn't disappoint. Thanks for keeping it real and giving us practical tools to make progress. 🤗💖
Especially loved this right now. Thank you Dana.
I feel we could be distress!!! I can totally relate to you and the way you think. I needed this.
Hey Dana! I’ve watched all of your videos (pretty much) over the last few months and you’ve helped me so much. I’ve gotten rid of over 300 items and its been great:)
Thank you, Dana!!
Nice demonstration! Even with no decisions being made, it made a big difference!
That "pen" thing was the cover to a meat thermometer so you don't get poked when you reach in the drawer. :)
Great video! I love your gentle approach. You’re motivating without being condemning! Having experienced emotional exhaustion from having to make so many decluttering/cleaning decisions, I can see your advice is spot on! Thank you for your encouragement!
I have your first book. It is what finally helped me make real progress in decluttering my messy house! I’m a big fan. Need to get your second book… 😍
You are an absolute GEM! I loved the b-roll breakdown… your theater skills in action… that was acting, right?! 😂 Anyways, GREAT video!!! The emotional tax of this “season” is very real and you addressed it perfectly. Thank you. I’m going to declutter a pile now. See ya 👋🏻
Oh my gosh you were reading my mind. Yes, I thought once I retired my house would be company ready all the time. I have made progress and then…..it stopped.
This is totally perfect for me at the moment. I’ve got to much stuff going on & finding it’s hard to get going but I know I can do it in stages now. Thank you x
You two are hilarious!!! Love reading your notes at the end of your video. Thanks Dana for being real. It makes me understand why I have trouble because I make it a decision instead of a simple process. Blessings to you and your family.
Thank you for being real and honest!
I just recently found you and your videos as I embark on the decluttering journey in our home. 😮. I absolutely LOVE a your personality and you make me laugh. 😂. Thank you for being human and motivating me (and teaching me) to declutter! 🎉😂
I always appreciate your commentary..... especially regarding "emotional decision-makimg".
Thanks for helping me overcome some of those road-blocks, so that I can get SOMETHING done, rather than nothing at all.
On a side-note:.
I used to work in Cosmetics, and I think your current shade of lipstick looks great on you.