This helps me understand my poor mother and now myself. Oh, for our lost, misunderstood years, nurturing others without realizing we needed to nurture ourselves.
Ifk what issues you have and what your therapist does for that, sounds like a lot... 😮 Initially I didn't believe in therapy and wasn't able to afford it anyway, so I listened to tons of free vids. Educated myself on many questions and finally allowed myself several sessions with a good specialist. Glad you can get access to many years of work. Also self-education helps greatly ❤
Since my man passed away I have droppped into most of these. It was preceded by 6 years of being sole caregiver. Plus. I've had long covid for almost 5 years. These besides CPTSD and depression. That's a lot!
Right there with you. Dealing with illness as well and this weekend, I just tucked grandma in the last time after 8 years of caring for her. It's a lot to process 🤍 take care of yourself, friend.
that's not entirely true. I'm not a psychologist so I cannot explain it logically. But me (and many others) can literally pin-point to the day where they first dissociated. It's such an out-of-body experience that it's hard to miss. Similar to "watching" yourself live. Not in the schizophrenic sense, where you actually. believe you are "outside" of your mind, but more so that it just feels unreal, fake.
@@Lyrielonwind I'd like there to be more discussion about being numb from an early age. Shutting down while keeping the mask up for acceptance. This numbness is tricky to recognize, it's so ingrained in the psyche, and hides our true selves from us. Anyone else relate?
*Slides timestamps:* 00:16 *Indicators of Depletion:* 2. a) to i) 02:58 2. j) to m) 05:07 *Unhealthy Self-Care Tendencies that come from CT* 3. a) to e) 08:16 3. f) to m) 10:46 *Healthy Self-Care* 4. i) to ii) //2 types: urgent crisis vs daily recurring; first aid vs longer recovery plan 11:44 4. a) to c) 14:44 4. d) to f) iv. 16:46 4. g) i. to iii.ii 19:25 4. g) cont'd
Why are others so oblivious? Why should I have to declare-hey, I have no energy and I am in pain; I can only perform that which is absolutely in priority. Let me clock out as I have completed my obligation and I have nothing left.
Thank you! When I see the title of your videos I think I guess I don't need to watch that I know I'm emotionally depleted. I have learned to brush that thought away because each time I watch your videos I learn and I am reminded and aware and taking one more step on my journey to healing. Thank you so much🙏🏼💕😇
Killer attitude, thanks for sharing. Do you remember the times when you didn't believe anything could make a difference? To all the readers... It does feel like that to all of us at one time! Keep going!
When will there be a video "here are the 26 steps to find a psychologist who really understands it and has the techniques to help in a meaningful way?"
The answer is a complex one because complex trauma is, well, complex. You'll have to try different techniques and with different therapists until you find the one that works for you. And even then you might need different techniques over a period of time and with different people. Techniques such as Sensorimotor Psychotherapy, EMDR, NARM, mindfulness, somatic experiencing, neurofeedback, CBT, DBT, psychodynamic therapy etc.
@@alexandrugheorghe5610 Gee, without you I would have never thought of that. Then maybe by the time I kick the bucket I will have made enough money to try every therapist on the planet. Fun facts: brain surgery is also complex, and so is heart surgery. Yet somehow it's possible to find those who specialize in those without trying them all. Fortunately, not all of them turn into youtube stars unavailable for appointments as soon as they get good at what they do.
I wish I could exercise, I'm literally house bound with genuine chronic fatigue, which makes you feel worse for days or sometimes weeks if I tried to exercise
He does give you the information at 10:43. He briefly talks about healthy self care to heal, and then he talks about the 12 things you need. I hope your healing journey is an adventure! Have a great day!
Man, when I look at the list of 12 needs I feel like it's such an impossible ideal to reach and like something that doesn't even exist in this extremely difficult and unstable world of ours. And on top of that, some of those needs and the things I need to do meet them feel so alien and anxiety inducing. I mean one of those needs is connection but thanks to my own childhood traumas dealing with people is HUGELY problematic thing that I'm not even mentally developed enough to handle. Some of those needs just seem impossible, let alone more than one of them.
Welcome to the time after nonage, the time where enlightenment becomes possible, and the fear of not attaining becomes physical and real. You got this. Look at the perspective you bring in your words. There's lots more to see of yourself!!
@@jeremylindemann5117 same. but helpfull to see what is missing. right? we have limitations. i try to met those needs as good as i can. 1 hrs of something still better than none. my core is emoty and will never be full or filled.
I saw your comment answering someone else and in that message you mentioned your dogos ...fur friends are for life❤.dogos are so healing and constant companions ... Very healthy🙏🏼. Sounds like you are meeting so many emotional needs through the dogos 🐕🦺...but that's just me observing...
Thank you so very much for your sermons. You have helped me grow in ways that God can only witness. You break things down to the point I can understand very well! This is what we all need. Thanks 😊
Thank you🪷 When I socialize, especially when I meet with one person, I get depleted. Why? The person shares their current challenge. Every time I realize that they just need a listener. I end up leaving after 1,5 hours feeling emotionally depleted. I start crying afterwards. Because I miss true and enjoyable connection. I prefer to read, dance, go for a walk. I have not figured out how to be with people and not be seen as a helper/listener.
Oh man ...this is starting to feel depressing - how tf is someone supposed to handle all of these symptoms man?! ... So I'm supposed to be outgoing but at the same not be hurting others? Gahhhhh this is so frustrating ...but thanks for the video :-D
I appreciate that but it’s even harder 🤣 to figure that out. In theory I get it … in practice how many soul crushing mistakes am I going to make to get to those boundaries 😭
@jeromenelson4093 the adverse events were the soul crusher, it's in the past. We just have to pick up the pieces and put them back together, live for today and tomorrow. It's only feels scary until you do the work, getting it done feels awesome, then it's just like working any other muscle to keep it toned. It takes time to fix the time 🤍 Work on your nervous system, reset your vagus nerve with breathing exercises and be sure you're sleeping enough. The sleep alone is numero uno but it's okay to take a "step-away" and reset the fight or flight. I've been on this journey a long time, and in times of high stress, sometimes it's still a daily task to be mindful as heck. When life gets chaotic, it's easy to lose the self if coping skills are forgotten or shelved for too long. It's okay to say NO to other people's expectations and assumptions if you're taking care of yourself, I just try not to miss the same friends birthday 2 years in a row to chronic fatigue, remembering going in that I always feel better AFTER socializing.
Cannot remember since ... When have all these indicators... Phew ....... Just dragging myself every day... I no longer know how i feel 😢 26 is my lucky number 😅
From one of Tim's videos, he says that the 12 needs are: 1) Pleasure, 2) Physical, 3) Sex, 4) Relationships, 5) Love, 6) Security, 7) Purpose, 8) Rest, 9) Beauty, 10) Sense of Wonder, 11) Spiritual and 12) Contentment.
This all happens when you are very physical ill also. They are not disdainful of physical illness any more and just telling everyone they are l because of stress or something. This is so so evil. I think they are depressed because they need medical help and are just not. Getting it. Do sinnester to do this to People and they are doing this medical gaslighting to women far more often then men
A word in your comment is blocked by the channel (not the platform) to prevent the advertisements from being shown alongside things advertisers don't want the product to be associated with. Premium sadly does not entitle us to free speech on this censored platform
This helps me understand my poor mother and now myself. Oh, for our lost, misunderstood years, nurturing others without realizing we needed to nurture ourselves.
Loved this: "You can't love others from an empty cup."
Damn, using shopping or substances just to "get through" the present moment because of internal pain is very real!
This content really helped me in ways that my therapist hasn’t and we worked together for six years, three days a week😂
Ifk what issues you have and what your therapist does for that, sounds like a lot... 😮 Initially I didn't believe in therapy and wasn't able to afford it anyway, so I listened to tons of free vids. Educated myself on many questions and finally allowed myself several sessions with a good specialist. Glad you can get access to many years of work. Also self-education helps greatly ❤
Who else feels like they have been this way their whole life?!?!
@@StarBitt97 ME😅
Me!
Pretty dang near 😢, but hey ty for all this amazingly right on time knowledge ❤
Yup
You can’t fix a broken brain with a broken brain! 🥰
You are God-sent. Im certain now. I drained myself serving church and being w family and ppl over the xmas break😩😩😩
Thanks for all the information you put out Tim, you’re helping me and many others become our best selves!
Who else doesn’t even need to watch to know they’ll hit all points?? 🗑️🏀
@@CPTSDRecoveryChatASMR Me lol
🙋🏻♀️
Meeeeeeee
Yep, the problem 4 me is the solutions
😂😂
Since my man passed away I have droppped into most of these. It was preceded by 6 years of being sole caregiver. Plus. I've had long covid for almost 5 years. These besides CPTSD and depression. That's a lot!
@@lucycorey9468 my ❤ goes out to you. May you heal and thrive🙏❣
Right there with you. Dealing with illness as well and this weekend, I just tucked grandma in the last time after 8 years of caring for her. It's a lot to process 🤍 take care of yourself, friend.
The problem with dissociation is you don't even know you are disconnected.
watch yourself, self aware, it takes some practice but you can do it!
that's not entirely true. I'm not a psychologist so I cannot explain it logically. But me (and many others) can literally pin-point to the day where they first dissociated. It's such an out-of-body experience that it's hard to miss. Similar to "watching" yourself live. Not in the schizophrenic sense, where you actually. believe you are "outside" of your mind, but more so that it just feels unreal, fake.
@@ormus64it was the day I had to put my beloved 😢dog down.
@@Lyrielonwind I'd like there to be more discussion about being numb from an early age. Shutting down while keeping the mask up for acceptance. This numbness is tricky to recognize, it's so ingrained in the psyche, and hides our true selves from us.
Anyone else relate?
*Slides timestamps:*
00:16 *Indicators of Depletion:* 2. a) to i)
02:58 2. j) to m)
05:07 *Unhealthy Self-Care Tendencies that come from CT* 3. a) to e)
08:16 3. f) to m)
10:46 *Healthy Self-Care* 4. i) to ii) //2 types: urgent crisis vs daily recurring; first aid vs longer recovery plan
11:44 4. a) to c)
14:44 4. d) to f) iv.
16:46 4. g) i. to iii.ii
19:25 4. g) cont'd
Why are others so oblivious? Why should I have to declare-hey, I have no energy and I am in pain; I can only perform that which is absolutely in priority. Let me clock out as I have completed my obligation and I have nothing left.
Stay until the end….she gives good advice. I wish I had known this 30 years ago.
I want to be left alone. I can't be bothered with people
@kathyfrancis9229 me too Kathy. I'd rather be with my dogs x
Thank you @TimFletcher, I appreciate that you are sharing these videos on this platform.
Thank you! When I see the title of your videos I think I guess I don't need to watch that I know I'm emotionally depleted. I have learned to brush that thought away because each time I watch your videos I learn and I am reminded and aware and taking one more step on my journey to healing. Thank you so much🙏🏼💕😇
Killer attitude, thanks for sharing. Do you remember the times when you didn't believe anything could make a difference? To all the readers... It does feel like that to all of us at one time! Keep going!
@ absolutely
Such important information/content.. 👏 😊
You explain everything so well. Thank you!!! ❤
I have been looking for escape my whole life. Thank god for television.
Thank you, Tim for putting this information out there for us. Have a blessed 2025!
When will there be a video "here are the 26 steps to find a psychologist who really understands it and has the techniques to help in a meaningful way?"
The answer is a complex one because complex trauma is, well, complex. You'll have to try different techniques and with different therapists until you find the one that works for you. And even then you might need different techniques over a period of time and with different people. Techniques such as Sensorimotor Psychotherapy, EMDR, NARM, mindfulness, somatic experiencing, neurofeedback, CBT, DBT, psychodynamic therapy etc.
@@alexandrugheorghe5610 Gee, without you I would have never thought of that. Then maybe by the time I kick the bucket I will have made enough money to try every therapist on the planet.
Fun facts: brain surgery is also complex, and so is heart surgery. Yet somehow it's possible to find those who specialize in those without trying them all. Fortunately, not all of them turn into youtube stars unavailable for appointments as soon as they get good at what they do.
I hear you. Psychologists are quacks 8/10 times when I try to find one.
Holy Spirit is the best psychiatrist which better than a psychologist
@@DelphineTheWorstBladeEver So true.
I love your talks! Keep 'em coming!
I do needed this teaching right now. Thank you, Tim!! You are a gem ❤🎉
I found out that my dad is my mother's biggest enemy this year. This past year has been incredibly eye-opening for me on so many levels
We don't need more information on how bad our lives are, we need information on HOW TO HEAL!
God's word heals
He does brings things to light which is important so we get them out of darkness
@@Doesitmatter-by3xb Exercise and nature. It’s an emotional restart.
I wish I could exercise, I'm literally house bound with genuine chronic fatigue, which makes you feel worse for days or sometimes weeks if I tried to exercise
He does give you the information at 10:43. He briefly talks about healthy self care to heal, and then he talks about the 12 things you need. I hope your healing journey is an adventure! Have a great day!
Thank you 😊 🧘
Man, when I look at the list of 12 needs I feel like it's such an impossible ideal to reach and like something that doesn't even exist in this extremely difficult and unstable world of ours.
And on top of that, some of those needs and the things I need to do meet them feel so alien and anxiety inducing. I mean one of those needs is connection but thanks to my own childhood traumas dealing with people is HUGELY problematic thing that I'm not even mentally developed enough to handle. Some of those needs just seem impossible, let alone more than one of them.
100% get it. For me it's about getting through as best I can putting minimal pressure upon myself.
Welcome to the time after nonage, the time where enlightenment becomes possible, and the fear of not attaining becomes physical and real. You got this. Look at the perspective you bring in your words. There's lots more to see of yourself!!
@jeremylindemann5117 wow! Yes!
@@jeremylindemann5117 same. but helpfull to see what is missing. right? we have limitations. i try to met those needs as good as i can. 1 hrs of something still better than none. my core is emoty and will never be full or filled.
God bless you! 🙏
All I really need is to go to sleep and never wake up again.
I understand that sentiment too week
First thing up on slide, grip strength, yes!!!!
Interesting that we use the metaphor “losing one’s grip”
I Love your Lists ❤
So grateful Tim. 🌿
Having that one intimate person isn't an option for everyone and its not something you can just magic up
@@alanamurray422 Right?! One can't always just "find someone" like that! Therapy isn't for poor ppl.
I saw your comment answering someone else and in that message you mentioned your dogos ...fur friends are for life❤.dogos are so healing and constant companions ... Very healthy🙏🏼. Sounds like you are meeting so many emotional needs through the dogos 🐕🦺...but that's just me observing...
Thank you so very much for your sermons. You have helped me grow in ways that God can only witness. You break things down to the point I can understand very well! This is what we all need. Thanks 😊
Thank you for sharing your insight!
The grip reminds me the dynamic from David Hawkins book - Power versus Force
Ahhh. Now I understand certain of my behavioral changes. TY Tim.
Thanks for this.
To the first Question: being alive. But we got this gals and guys. We got this, we all got this.
Thank You for this collective self reflection theory....
I can at least notice when I start to deplete now (mostly) but I struggle severely with repletion
Thank you ❤❤❤
Oh that’s why I’m clumsy and drop things sometimes? One day I kept dropping things multiple times
Thank you🪷 When I socialize, especially when I meet with one person, I get depleted. Why? The person shares their current challenge. Every time I realize that they just need a listener. I end up leaving after 1,5 hours feeling emotionally depleted. I start crying afterwards.
Because I miss true and enjoyable connection.
I prefer to read, dance, go for a walk.
I have not figured out how to be with people and not be seen as a helper/listener.
Oh man ...this is starting to feel depressing - how tf is someone supposed to handle all of these symptoms man?! ... So I'm supposed to be outgoing but at the same not be hurting others? Gahhhhh this is so frustrating ...but thanks for the video :-D
Adopt solid boundaries, take care of yourself first 🤍
I appreciate that but it’s even harder 🤣 to figure that out. In theory I get it … in practice how many soul crushing mistakes am I going to make to get to those boundaries 😭
@jeromenelson4093 the adverse events were the soul crusher, it's in the past. We just have to pick up the pieces and put them back together, live for today and tomorrow. It's only feels scary until you do the work, getting it done feels awesome, then it's just like working any other muscle to keep it toned. It takes time to fix the time 🤍 Work on your nervous system, reset your vagus nerve with breathing exercises and be sure you're sleeping enough. The sleep alone is numero uno but it's okay to take a "step-away" and reset the fight or flight. I've been on this journey a long time, and in times of high stress, sometimes it's still a daily task to be mindful as heck. When life gets chaotic, it's easy to lose the self if coping skills are forgotten or shelved for too long. It's okay to say NO to other people's expectations and assumptions if you're taking care of yourself, I just try not to miss the same friends birthday 2 years in a row to chronic fatigue, remembering going in that I always feel better AFTER socializing.
This is what is happening to me right now, I just discovered I was sexually abused as a child right now I am not doing well at all.
Thank you, Tim. ❤❤
This explains the last two years 🤦🏾. I'm glad to see a clear explanation of what it is and what to do.
I'm surprised that "sleeping all the time" doesn't show up as one of the first points.
11:41 good self care 🙏🏼
Thank you I am listening !!!
Cannot remember since ... When have all these indicators... Phew .......
Just dragging myself every day... I no longer know how i feel 😢
26 is my lucky number 😅
❤
Thought I had lyme last year, my grip, steps, and balance were all effected, as was my speech. "Fatigue".
What are the 12 needs?
From one of Tim's videos, he says that the 12 needs are: 1) Pleasure, 2) Physical, 3) Sex, 4) Relationships, 5) Love, 6) Security, 7) Purpose, 8) Rest, 9) Beauty, 10) Sense of Wonder, 11) Spiritual and 12) Contentment.
@@Angela-c3g2j thank you! Do you by chance know what video he discussed this?
I would like the list of 12 please
People deplete me.
🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹
I have no skin metaphorically speaking 😢
Well I'm totally screwed then
I maintain Tim would derail the entire Western economy and caste system if people listened to him
I knew it was at a 8 for three years and I am not allowed to do anything on my one now it is at a 11 and a half
This all happens when you are very physical ill also. They are not disdainful of physical illness any more and just telling everyone they are l because of stress or something. This is so so evil. I think they are depressed because they need medical help and are just not. Getting it. Do sinnester to do this to People and they are doing this medical gaslighting to women far more often then men
I feel it.
Too tired to think or listen to others
A video about me. 😅😬😁👍🏻
Jokes aside, does anyone else wonder where Tim stores all this knowledge? 😄😊
This is me
I have headache!
For me, it's all about decent sleep.
All my comments are being deleted...
Except this one!
🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉 youtube is getting it's revenge for people not wanting their "premium"
A word in your comment is blocked by the channel (not the platform) to prevent the advertisements from being shown alongside things advertisers don't want the product to be associated with. Premium sadly does not entitle us to free speech on this censored platform
😮 👀 👏
❤🙌❤🤜💥🤛💫🎖🏅🥇🏆❤️🙏🙏🙏🙌🫶
🌻
❤
This place is so bad eating sends deerhunter. No kidding coffee knocked out.😊
What are all the 12 needs?
@@nayaleezy my question too!!