you're not spending enough time alone
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 6 ก.ค. 2024
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I often feel much lonelier in social situations (weddings, parties and other big group settings especially) than I do when I'm actually alone.
Especially when it gets so loud that I can’t hear conversations, I just shut down & wish to leave.
Same here. I’ve been called a lot of names as a result. But whenever i am at these events, i feel so out of place, people are so full of themselves sometimes. I find myself wanting to leave less than an hour later
at some point, we all confused being alone with loneliness. You can be with crowds and still feel lonely. You can be all by yourself and still feel whole.
when you have taken control over your dopamine, you can feel completely happy, even alone.
you're developing such a unique style :)
Don't you guys live together? 🤔
we do!
"[...]building a solid relationship with yourself is one of the most important things to do" is a sentence everyone deserves to hear and take to heart. Life is infinitely more bearable when you're comfortable in your own solitary space ❤
A lot of humanities problems are caused by people sitting in a room by themselves alone depends on what the person is doing whether they're planning good or planning evil. Look at Stalin and listen to the song by Saga; The Snow Fell;
"He he sat in a room in a square of the color of red, he'd rule the whole world if there was a way that he could. He'd sit and he'd stare at the minarets on top of the towers for he was a beast as he hatched his new plans to gain power"
Part of your question has to do too with the fact that chosen people have people with a mission in life have to be alone. They're isolated by deity by Providence by the universe to develop the character that they need to be to be the person they're going to be need to be to lead other people to help other people
the happiest times in my long life were, as a young boy, the one or two month canoe trips in northen quebec. the peace and serenity were everywhere.
I may be the life of the party, but I truly cherish my solitude. As a writer, photographer, and avid reader, I have no trouble keeping myself entertained. That "alone time" is essential for me - it's when I connect with my best friend: me. At social gatherings, I find that after about 20 minutes, I'm already longing to return to my cherished "me time." I empathize with those who require constant external stimulation. My advice is simple: dedicate more time to solitude and acquaint yourself with the most extraordinary person in your life - you!
I’ll add for those who require constant external stimulation- it takes exposure therapy! I’m in the process right now, of intentionally being alone on more days, training my body that it’s safe and that I’m still okay.
This is what i feel too. I'm genuinely happier when alone.
I wish more TH-cam vlogs look like this. The authenticity and realness of each moment make me somehow feel peace
Sometimes when I have to join a group of people, around whom I'm not too comfortable, I feel awkward and have to pull out my phone to look at something just to avoid the awkwardness. Now that I'm more confident with myself, I can join conversations more comfortably and don't have to use the phone to hide myself away so much anymore. But when meeting people but not able to connect with anyone of them, when the conversations are shallow on the surface of a topic that I don't care, I feel lonely - my social energy is drained from such situations.
I believe as introverts, spending time to connect with ourselves, or connect with good friends who listens to our sharing and we can listen to their sharing, that's when we feel fulfilled.
Absolutely, I have the same!!
I absolutely agree. I'm out alone on long rides or runs on most days and always fet asked things like "Isn't that boring all by yourself" or "Don't you feel lonely". I think many people aren't comfortable alone because they are deep down not actually happy with who or how they are or are out of balance in some other way but do not allow themselves to admit it or explore why that might be the case. It's far easier to try to avoid getting to know yourself by constantly distracting yourself with people around you or always doing something or even multiple things at a time. That's up until a certain point when it ll comes crashing down.
To truly know yourself, you need to be alone with your thoughts and get to know the real you. In the presence of others we all wear a mask.
"You are the only constant in your life"
I feel like this video was made for me! I'm glad you came up in my recommended
Being alone is easy.
Being lonely is devastating.
Being alone with conviction is hard.
Being lonely with conviction is self-suffering.
Recently found your channel, and I couldn't agree more! Yea the more time you spend with yourself ("lonely") the more you get to know yourself and understand yourself better, building a strong character. (Also you get better at quieting the public/distraction) Being alone has really thought me very valuable things that I wouldn't have otherwise ever gotten to learn! I take & see alone time as a time to self generate and improve thyself!
the countryside where you are living is stunning! beautifully shot too. i love spending time alone, especially outdoors but happy just to be indoors cooking, making music, or working on a project too. it's fun to balance - some social time and a lot of alone time.
Introspection is good and something we have to do. Sometimes you are confronted by problems or issues rattling around in the brain. You mentioned feeling Lost. But that starts the problem-solving process around how you counter what you need to. Aloneness is a form of meditation, and you generally build far more resilience than others.
I've always put it like this: "You have to live with yourself for the rest of your life."
Great video, and seriously will never not be happy t hear this thing talked about, because it's a weekly occurrence for me wherein people just don't understand how you can be completely content with your own company if you learn how to treat yourself like a good friend.
absolutely!! glad you resonate :)
Feeling at peace after watching this .Had a long day🥲❤️
I've been making relationship with myself for 3 years to be alone. My life's getting better . I'm not afraid of having not friends, girlfriend, or missing out of parties. I don't say that I'm an antisocial person. Instead, it makes me better in socialize because I know the time to socialize and time for myself.
Thanks for your video❤
I can resonate with this. Loving that I'm not alone in the appreciation for being alone.
Wow. Completly blown away by the quality and beauty of your videos. Some of the most thoughtfully made videos I have ever seen. Looking forward to seeing more 🔥
thank you so much! 🤗
Excellent timing for me on this topic. Thank you TH-cam for the accurate algorithm. Cool the be on the first floor of a channel that is going to blow up. I just know it.
appreciate it!! 🤗
As an artist, I've been intentionally trying to find some space to work and think alone. Thanks for sharing your journey and process. It's inspiring!
Thank you for this. So many people don't understand being alone. Your insights are spot on. Great videos.
appreciate it! :)
This is amazing. Thanks for the well spend time here.
Love from Brazil :)
I finally found someone who thinks exactly like me: "that being alone is the best thing to do." Because most people don't understand that we stay in full contact with our inner self. It's the best way to get to know ourselves, do self-analysis and be grateful to ourselves. Our ethical and moral values are strengthened. Now this opens up a big internal discussion with ourselves, because we end up being more selective in social and personal relationships, greatly reducing the circle of friendships, because we no longer share the opinions of people outside our way of life. Much peace and positive energy to you.🌹🌻🌹🌻
What a beautifully filmed video! Solitude in nature can be so good for the soul! I’m inspired to make more videos a little bit like this one ❤
Very nice calming video and insane scenery!!
It takes a different kind of strength to be alone
keep going girl 🎈 you create really good content. and nice to see we have similar thoughts and mental.
Your video really inspires me. It also makes me quite jealous of how far you are with self-development. ❤
I am now trying to work on this myself. It really is a beautiful adventure and I am getting to know myself better every day.
Groundbreaking video. Really touched something deep inside. I put off watching this over the days as it sat in my home page. Finally decided to check what you had to say about it. Exceeded expectations! Thank you.
thank you! glad you enjoyed it :)
A beautiful, thought-provoking video. Thank you Ottilie 💚
Thank you Nina!! 🥰
Hey, that was phenomenal! I love your style. Congrats on finding the peace to live alone.
thanks!! glad you enjoyed it :)
This is amazing!! I find Solace and peace in times when im alone!! This was so relatable!! Great work
I think people in this comment section would appreciate the song "Bru C - Introspection". My favourite quote from it is "You were born alone and you will die all by yourself" which also really shows that you need to come to terms with ultimately being alone and that that's fine.
Hi from France,
Your video made me feel calm and peaceful. I regularly want to step back from the permanent activity around me but feel bad about it, because we are supposed to enjoy being surrounded by people, because it's joyful to share with friends. And it's true. But sometimes what I need is just being alone. After watching this, I konw it's fine.
I'll go read my book now. Bye, and thank you
Yes, same here, I enjoy spending time in my own, homemaking, baking, talking walks, then after this my social battery is charged and I cam spend time with friends, its perfectly normal
i spend all my life alone and i can tell you that those are the times when you learn a LOT and get to understand how this world works while getting the opportunity to get to know yourself better and listen to your own self WITHOUT the noise that is all around us constantly.
One of the best things you can enjoy in life is yourself.🥰
As an introvert myself I've come to the point that self-acceptance is key when it comes to enjoying solitude. That's because it can often be us being self-critical and not truly embracing our preferences.
When someone asks me if I feel lonely, I am not offended by this question at all. I just say that I rarely feel lonely and that I need to spend time by myself to recharge my batteries. If I get asked further questions I usually explain to people what introversion is all about based on the books and articles I read on the subject. If someone still finds it weird then it's probably not a person I need in my life (I don't go round and ask people why they have to be around people all the time - I accept them and respect their preferences if their lifestyle makes them happy).
Overall it comes down to our culture that promotes extroversion. Open offices, group work, networking parties, etc. But I again I believe it's up to us to be comfortable in our own skin and to embrace our choice of how we want to live our life.
I love solitude, it really is a great way to reconnect with yourself. To find out your values, what you like to do, anything that needs processing (e.g. trauma), unmet needs, clarity and peace. Hobbies such as reading, journaling, meditation and being surrounded by nature just enrich my soul ❤
Lastly despite all of that I sometimes do feel lonely. But what helps is not being around a lot of people or having tons of friends. What helps is just having a few people who I connect to on a deeper level. So I feel understood ❤
It's interesting that often being around people who don't get me makes me more lonely 🤔
This video is so good 😭👍
I have spent a year on the small island in Denmark mostly by myself. Spend this time reading lots of books and just wandering around. I did find peace with myself and learned to spend time with myself. I had my special places to sit and daydream, I slept for 8+ hours a day, did some exercise but for the most of the day I just spend time thinking.
After a full year of doing so I was ready to return to people and now - 10 years after this experience I am really good at being alone, whenever I need to stay by myself I never got bored and I have a bit different perspective on people who are by themselves in restaurants or cinema or wherever - I see it as special time they have with themself
How did you get that opportunity?
Hi Ottilie, I love your content and saw all of your videos and I really loved this one. I myself am a very lonely person. Since I was a Child I need some time in the day to just be alone even having lot’s of friends and relatives to be with. Today I’m a 41 year old father of two lovely kids with 16 and 2 years old and I’m married with my wife since my 24. Even today with all of this scenario in my life I can’t pass one day without being alone in solitude. Being alone in nature just listening and watching is one of my life’s pleasures. I’m also aware that the “dose makes the venom”, and try not to exagerate, even so till this day I never feel that I was lonely, but find your balance and be happy with that… Keep on making those magical videos, but don’t rush it… Cheers from Portugal.
It’s very touching how well your thoughts and feelings are articulated through. From the first shot to the last.
Thank you for sharing your journey! Subscribed
thank you! :)
Such a wonderful message and beautiful shots to accompany the amazing storytelling! Bravo ❤️💫🙏 keep spreading your light and creativity! It is such a gift to enjoy the time we spend with oneself! Much love and guidance my friend 💛
thank you! 🤗
4:35 Ikigai is a Japanese term that blends two words: “iki” meaning “to live,” and “gai” meaning “reason,” which translates to “a reason to live.” It's a concept that encourages people to discover what truly matters to them and to live a life filled with purpose and joy.
loved every second of it!
glad to hear 🤗
wow the compostition of each shot is amazing. just love it
thank you!! :)
thank you for sharing your experience, it was a very pleasant and enjoyable vibe throughout the whole video. Keep it up🤞🏼
So glad I found your video. It really makes me think. Really nice video style by the way! :)
thank you! glad you liked it :)
We say "spend" time alone, but it we should say "invest" time alone because it gives you something in return such: peace, clarity… (loved your video 😊I too used to hate piano lessons😂)
We love your way ❤️🙏🌲
I love ur voice ✨❤
Such an amazing video :D
Beautiful and deep message which I resonate with immensely🙏. New subscriber🌾☺️
Hey Ottilie, I spend a lot of time by myself. I work remotely and don't have any friends, but I think I'm okay with the solitude. I think I understand you.
If you like yourself it’s easy to be happy alone.
i needed this right now
I loveeee this video!! You have such a unique style, I love the way you visualize your brain spinsels! It’s like we are seeing your journal, it’s so intimite! Thanks for sharing it!🙏🏻🤍🦋🌞
Thank you so much!! this is such a nice take 🥰
I don’t know that I can be alone for a long time but it would be nice to do a solo trip sometime though that can prove hard when you’re married and both share a passion for traveling to new places, feels selfish.
Ottilie, I love this viedeo so much! well done!!!
Thank you so much!!
Hello i m Clément from France and i just want to say thank you for sharing your thoughts .
Great video! I hope you get to experience some of those times „alone“ with Jonne, too.
Absolutely! :)
I love this video ❤
wow! it took me less than a minute to hit the subscribe button! thank you so much for the video.
ahh thank you!!
wow what a stunning video 🙃
Wow, wat een wijze woorden. Supergoed!
Thanks for the video. Loved it. Wish I found your channel sooner.
thank you for the video, cheers from Venezuela 🇻🇪 far far away from Sweden 👋
Your comment about piano lessons-- oh boy, that's the same for me!
Great video!
You’re the only constant in your life ❤
I can relate so much to your thought. Maybe we are sometimes inclined to judge ourselves because society constantly tells us what's right and wrong, not because we feel bad when we are alone.
This video inspired me to write a song. Lovely to stumble upon
that's so nice to hear!
Great video! I see a lot of myself in you. I need to be alone a lot, it is my default. I have trouble thinking clearly otherwise. =)
It took me about 30 years to fully grasp that every feeling is there to be felt and that they are there for a reason. There is nothing wrong with not feeling perfect all the time. It is all a part of a beautiful journey but it certainly can feel like hell in the moment sometimes. Surrender has been a huge key for me to enjoy life more.
Hope you have a wonderful day, take care!
Im glad I clicked your video
As always AMAZING video
thank you!! 🤗
The scenery in your part of the world is very mystical as well as amazing.🏔️
Great video ❤
living in a place like that... alone? yeah thats so peaceful
The only concern I would have is a medical emergency. If it takes longer than 20 min. to get to a hospital, or if it would take a long time for paramedics to get to you. That would be my only worry.
Solitude does not mean lonliness.
Solitude is active and regenerative. Loneliness is a mentality burdened from victimhood and lack of vision. I found a ton of nuggets and discovered what I truly wanted without bombarding myself with the opinions of others with more silence (i.e. take time away from screens).
What feelings and thoughts are you running away from? Maybe there’s a breakthrough behind a little bit of solitude (aka quality time with yourself).
I like your content so much and I love being lonely
What a nice video. For a time to answer this is ok. And another time a reminder says no. More of your own.
I admire this lifestyle
Thanks beautiful. I agree. I love my alone time.
Humans have generally spent considerable time and energy building a "life" that they then spend vast quantities of time and money trying to escape and avoid. Vacations, toys, addictions, and distractions. I created a life I need no escape from, and it is in no small part due to spending introspective time alone. A lot of time alone. No one else understands it, I feel no need to try to explain it.
Thank you 😊
I´m agree with you, i´m a nature lover too. I will enjoy my loneliness in one of these places, but i don´t have nothing similar.😭😭😭
Great Video.
Thank you
I love the way you express yourself, made me think! Beautiful! Funny enough my name is Ot ;)
Hahah love it!
Amazing video.
"A man among friends is king but a man alone is ruler of his kingdom" Thanks for Sharing...
Beautiful everything 🥹🫧
thank you! 🤗
I've been freelancing and remote working for ... uff a long time. (getting old here 0.0)
and the reality is, that I learned to reach out, spend time together and get to know people - a lot more intentionally.
If you need to associate closeness with proximity are you truly close?
I wish I had met you in Maastricht :)
This kind of videos makes me think that I am living an empty life
Oh yes I do.