"If you're attractive, you're not gonna always attract great guys... you're gonna attract some crazies, because you're attractive." DAMN..that's scary, and very true
OG Loc Hahaha I am nowhere near 50 What has age got to do with it? So do you think that a when a woman stats dating a man she should see him every single night and every single day and that the man should "look after the woman"? He's a conman. If he was short, fat and ugly would you still be taking dating advice from him? It's quite sad that a man has to travel all the way from England to the US to tell women how to get a man to look after them and pay him money for that useless advice And YOU criticise ME One woman asks is it OK to have sex with more than one man at a time and he tells her it is OK
@@ItsNotRealLife the more attractive you tend to look, the more likely you are to attract a VAST majority of people and a lot of them are crazy, desperate, clingy, etc etc.. I've experienced this, so I would know lmao so the more physically attractive you are, then the higher amount of crazies you attract, attracting more crazies than the usual person. Get it?
OG Loc Why are you being so aggressive and verbally abusive to me? Incidentally, who were you talking to? How on earth do you work out I'm insecure you must've just plucked that put of thin air. Insecure people are the ones who are abusive. Insecure women are the ones watch such videos listening to, and viciously defending, a man giving them dating advice and them to need to see a man every night and every day and that a man should look after them. Doesn't sound very secure to me
Sweet Leaf I do get it and totally agree. I'm a tall very good looking guy and that's caused me problems over the years. Men jealous of me Men thinking I'm after the GFs or vice-versa Women who, on the surface, appear nice and sweet as mommas home-made apple pie but underneath they were clingy crazies. The not-so-handsome men don't get to much attention but seem to be the happiest. In fine now though, I've found THE one. Not the prettiest girl in the world but she's sexy AF and as great girl too
Yes, I agree that as human beings we all have flaws both physical and behavioral. Nevertheless, how can we forget that human beings are the most precious and absolute best creation of Almighty, regardless of race, religion, gender, and sexual orientation. The entertainment industry and media create so much pressure that we are constantly worried about our outer appearance, and we are constantly fooled by the false hope. Wasting money like water. News flash!!! man is mortal, and so is wrinkle. So far human being is the best creation of Almighty, so it is needless to say that no doctor or plastic surgeon possibly could have done a better job than Almighty himself, right!!!
absolutely not...I’m going through a difficult love situation that I am trying to end. Everytime I feel myself doubting about my decision, I listen to Mathew!
@@piemoon2488 would it kill you to not be mean and evil like the mainstream and actually be nice for someone other than yourself? I tell ya, selfish people are popping everywhere! 😐
That sounds great sweetie 🤗🤗 never be anyone's slave nor rag. You are your own person and you can do everything by yourself as well cuz you are independent 🥰
he's making millions off insecure women. Its just more bullshit men do to further manipulate women. You'll eventually find out he has abused several women himself.
@@Vhfash you sure have the confidence make that assumption about men, and Mathew hussey.... You're just upset because Mathew hussey is changing the way a woman's role in a relationship should be and what it shouldn't be... If science says that women are better than men in leadership intelligence and maturity... Then why don't women have the confidence to take the big risks for a change and go make the first move.... women like you are the reason why men don't approach women anymore... You're just making these assumptions about Mathew hussey, because you're misogynistic, he's helping women being better partners for men... because in a relationship it's about both partners, not one but two... If you hate him then you are obviously one of those women who thinks, men should be the ones to approach women, men should be the ones to always pay, men should always be the providers and taking care of the women... But what does the woman offer to the relationship apart from her beauty??? Because beauty fades then what do you have to offer to the table??? Men are life partners, they're not life savers
@@JohnSmith-pl4sf Men should approach women. And several men thankfully still do, including matthew hussey himself. I am sorry you don't have the balls to go after the women you like, and prefer to hide in a corner waiting for women to chase you and buy you flowers. And calling a woman misogynistic makes no sense. Please educate yourself and look up the definition of misogynistic. Finally, my comment was about matthew litterally making millions of dollars coaching insecure women on how to handle confused men. And has nothing to do with what you have posted. But while we are on the topic of your ridiculous post... Women just need to be brave enough to set standards, and maintain them fiercely. Instead of settling for the BS men peddle, such as "i want women to chase me too" LOL. If you are not 6'5 with a massive bank account, and a cock to match, please forget the delusion of women chasing you. Men have always gone after women for the past 3000 years. Just because your diet is now full of estrogen, and mainstream media has convinced you that bravery in a man is not good, and that women should chase after your tiny penis doesn't mean its going to happen. You are better off watching PORN until you are dead, cause no woman would want a man that doesn't have to BALLS to go after what he wants. FOOL.
Whats wrong to be a stalker?Well if ur a polite stalker and ur reasons are love and not some creeepy stuff,nothing wrong with that. Is like insisist to get a job or realise ur dreamsand u try over n over. Most of couples,including my mother,she didnt liekd my father first and he kind of polite stalker her 6 mnoths and after got married.I heard many of these examples.
@@lazarcatalina1176 if someone doesn't want to be with you and they make that clear but you still insist then you're disrespecting their opinion and valuing what you want over what they want rather than treating them like a fellow human being, this goes for men and women.
First level: dependence (someone else to do it). Second level: independence (do it all yourself). Third level: interdependence (teamwork effort). -- “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People” - Dr. Steven R. Covey.
@@Y.HAJ. While they're doing something for you, you have a work to do which is show your gratitude and then later also do something for them. It's a give and take circle that never ends, if done right.
As someone has told me whne a woman is too strong,i can do it by my self is acting masculine.We have to think at very feminine guys who are acting girlie,would u like that? That person told me,guys testosterone goes down when a woman is masculine or when she is histeric.Increased when she laughs,shes happy and having a positive vibe.
@@lazarcatalina1176 Its correct. These are concepts of masculine and feminine energies. Masculine energy wants to ground itself through the feminine. This cannot occur if a women does not show her vulnerability. It is how a man would connect with his vulnerability with her ... again masculine energy comes to ground through the feminine. If a man cannot connect with this vulnerability in this , it does lead to the kind of imbalanced connections Matthew discusses. I find these ideas of masculine feminine energies to be not well understood by either gender. Men are encouraged by society to not be vulnerable for example.
Akapoklo Actually he knows more about men than women do so hes teaching them what to do since these women have more compassion to sustain the relationship...keep up!
This is the only relationship advice person I’ve heard say “do you really WANT that guy?” So many are tips to manipulate men who never call or text or make time into liking you and never call out that maybe those dudes aren’t into you or maybe they suck!
Oh shit... I was literally watching this video, paused it to go do something else in the house, came back with an ice cream aaaand WHOOMP there it is 😂😂😂😂
+YesReneau OMG! It's you! LOL! :D It's so funny to see that you posted a comment on this video, LOL! :D I'm subscribed to your channel since quite a long time and I also watched a few of your "Harvard" videos! :)
As I understand them, here are the three confident mindsets: 1) be confident enough to know you’re worth spending time with and being treated well and insist on those things; 2) be strong enough to allow yourself to be taken care of and be vulnerable to being hurt; 3) be decisive enough to commit to being intimate with only one man and be direct enough to get on the same page with him about expectations concerning level of exclusivity/commitment.
I’m literally the type of woman who knows I can do it but like you said “ it’s fun when someone else does it for me” and I thought that literally made me a bad person up until watching this hahaha
***** you sound exactly like the other older angry women/ undesirable ones who go crazy cause nobody is giving you attention lol. once you know what to look for its quite easy to spot them.....
It is easy to be confident, when no one has torn you down It is easy to be strong, when you never been burnt It is harder when you have reason to be insecure and you’re NOT I love these lines, thank you thank you this made me feel better about myself
Men need women, women need men”. That’s darned right! God said on GENESIS 2:18 “It is no good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” And Genesis 2:24 “ Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” How about that!!! It’s a command, not a suggestion. Guys, go get your gal now.
Ladies, you can never get THE guy, just as we can't get THE girl, but we can find someone to spend our life with if we are reasonable, capable and care about ourselves first...then go looking, otherwise we are looking to someone else to fix our shit, which always ends badly.
Lacey Harris I did! It was scary to trust enough to show off the dusty corners of the mixed up soul but he saw it, loves it, and both cherishes it and by accepting and loving those parts of me they are mending on their own. I used to not get the "you complete me" talk but it's not that they are what you are not and like magic you feel whole, but that the love and acceptance makes your broken pieces heal, making you feels more completed and whole than you ever did before. His acceptance of all that I am gave me so much confidence and security. He gained the same from me too because we both are domestic abuse victims and both were broken birds but with freedom of never fearing a bad reaction out of the other one... we now have something incredible. Guys like this exist!
3:23 Matthew puts into perspective 3 levels of a woman. The highest level is a woman who knows she can get through life on her own but still allows other people to help her simply because it is more fun and they can recognize that someone else wants to be of service to them. Other people really do get fulfillment out of helping you and that is why I always allow them to help me if they want to. I love this video!
I will practice it! Normally I don't do it. :) I wish I could understand all the video, but listen to me is more complicated than read! Good luck to us all! :)
"i am exercising my options, when i find someone i like im gonna start focussing on that person. nou my options still give me confidence because they remind me that i am a attractive woman. but im not gonna exercise those options when im actually focussing on this person i care about." ♡
Omg. You are freaking fantastic. I love hearing a self-assured man explain the disconnect happening between "strong" women and good men. I especially love the response to the woman wanting more of her guy's time but not recognizing she chose a non-committal guy to begin with. Love this.
C Savina Exactly my point but his fake accent grates on my nerves but I managed to last through it. He's what we would call a Cunard Yank (British sailors who sail to NY and come back speaking in a strange fake American accent)
+Lauren Doubtful. He also doesn't ever talk about men (or women) who have Cluster B personality disorders, like Narcissists, Borderlines, Sociopaths, Psychopaths. Those disordered individuals who look just like you and me, and can pull it off confidently for 2-3-4 months before their social masks slips and the nightmare emerges. This guy is a bit dangerous ONLY because of what he doesn't know and what he doesn't address in human behavior. Then, he goes around talking from a place of authority and knowledge that he doesn't really have. Best advice...follow your gut instinct with people, male or female. Those gut instinct do not lie. They may not be clear as to why you're having them, but do not ignore them. They are spot on every time.
+le th My instinct tells me to forget the women who didn't go out with me, to meet new ones, to get into the friend zone only with the ones I'm not attracted to! With the ones I'm attracted to I need to be sarcastic and flirty with them, to not complement them much, to give indirect sexual remarks, to touch firmly on the hips when they laugh damn hard to be confident, but to work out and muscle up just for me not to attract them of course, and to be emotionally independent from them, to not care so much about their validation of me as much as I care about my own personality but to pay attention to them when they complain about something important!
Here is how I choose my women, Mindset 1: If she doesn't offer to pay, Bye Felicia Mindset 2: If she tells me what to do, where to go, how to live, I get rid of her. It's okay sometimes but not every day. Mindset 3: Spending most of the time at clubs/bars like 3 visits a week, Girls night out is not a Hall Pass. I m single and I go out to clubs. I've met so many married women and girls in relationships who want to bang. I rejected this woman one night, we were having a great conversation. I spotted the ring and questioned her about it. She left me and moved to the dance floor and started making out hard with this African American dude. So, I don't want someone I invest to do shit like that. Don't be that "Hot girl at the bar, who everyone wants to fuck". Have some self-respect, There are a ton of other places to have fun. PS - I don't have anything against African American men, It's just that 'most' of these guys who hang outside of nightclubs and bars are sober and mostly take viagra, that was something two guys told me during small talk. They're there to take advantage of drunk women as they have a better mental consciousness over a drunk person. Especially Huntington Beach, West Hollywood and DTLA.
I’ve been binge watching your videos for the past year whenever I’m feeling a bit insecure or unsure of myself and my feelings or the situations that I put myself in... I appreciate you “over delivering” you definitely always do that. You have the ability to nail the problem so quickly and read the person or situation right off the batt. It’s impressive and the way you say it makes it so clear and your advice feels so genuine even through video! Love you! Thanks for enough videos to help me for the next few months! 😍🙌🏽
1:19 she only has him one night a week 2:28 a girl doing things for herself 5:00 going off of past experiences to judge a new man 7:18 should you date one person at a time? 10:23 asking a guy if he is taken or not 10:45 a girl attracts good guys and bad guys at the same time
Holy crap, wasn't sure what I was expecting, but Matthew is on point. Married 14 years to a great guy--wonderful daddy--we fight like cats and dogs at times but man, I cannot imagine life without him. Can I be happy on my own? Sure can, but as Mr. Hussey said, the kids and hubby are so so so much fun. We both ask each other for help from time to time. He's a massive IT brain so he helps me with my websites. I am a writer, I help him with his resume or when he has a big work-related presentation. I recently fell ill and learned I had a rare autoimmune disorder and he was all in, right there! Love is hard work but it is such a win win. Homeboy is so young to be this wise. Tell it brother, we DO need each other.
11:45-12:10 Great point. If you're generally attractive, you're gonna attract EVERYBODY including the guys you don't want. There's always a negative to every positive.
I agree that a woman needs a man as much as man needs a woman. If you both agree that you need each other in your life then you'll gonna start an incredible relationship in your life.
“Most women aren’t doing anything......they are sitting at home eating icecream” Me: *looks over at the Ben and Jerry’s on my bed* welp.....I’m gonna die alone 😂
Nicole Kornhaus no, you’re not! You’ve just noted what you are doing and what you aren’t doing. Now, you’re going to change up your game, play by your rules, and be your own, natural self! You go thus. Go get em!
Some of people grow up in dysfunctional family relationship, i personally grow up in family where my parent are really cold, distant, argue, dont work toward problem. Honestly i don't have a good sample to learn and in that time i dont know why my dating in my early life really bad until i learn and solve all my internal problem and believe and it is getting better. But some of people they lucky, they are warm and healthy family, good for you. Great video, keep up in what you do. For me, it improve once i learn, people skill, understand them, non attachment attitude etc.
You are an ethereal healthy father figure who put time in to educate his own daughter how to preserve their value and why. My father treated me like a princess but never taught me how to treat myself like one so thank you
some men and women are just too needy and won't allow a person to be to themselves . People have lives and need to keep their identity and continues of personal growth....If I have a boyfriend I personally cannot be around him non stop or see him all week. i prefer my "me" time.
That is the most selfish thing you can say ! If you love a person you wish to have him around you all time! "me" time should transform in "we" time even if you are just being lazy or just buying socks! Yeah we work, we have needs that we can help each other! Why should you just make him frustrated when he needs you by his side you just say "Sorry dude is ME time today"...
I get it, I ended a year relationship yofsy because of the neediness that was consistent to them not listening to allowing me space. You're valid in needing your own life, they tend to move as quickly as they can and pretend they don't realise that's how trust is broken. It's off putting when they give up their entire life, time and hobbies just to be around you and put their great difficulties of giving this all up, on you when you tell them that, that is not what healthy relationships are. You did good
Wow I so needed to watch this video. I was heavily doubting myself and when Matthew said "why having bad experiences make you lose confidence? " It really made me think. There's still so much to explore there's so much out there for me.
Your advice is always so so helpful. Everything you say is encouraging to just be myself, be happy in my own skin, take myself seriously, love myself and that I am in power of whoever I choose to let into my life and how they treat me. Thanks. You're the bomb!!! Guys do not walk all over me anymore.
Mind blowing to know, as a guy, that women are facing same problems as us. We are socially disconnected, having less and less sex and not loving like our parents and grandparents did just because of unachievable high expectations.
It's socail media/apps have given everyone the illusion of choice and turned us into a throw away generation. . Someone says or does one little thing 'wrong', we can drop them, knowing the next one is only a swipe away.....
I have a code I do not date any cheaters or beaters a lot of married men forget that if they are going after me that makes him a cheater so what would make me think that if they were with me that they would not cheat on me and not only that but the wife finds out that their husbands looking they become a beater towards me LOL but very true. I have been dating in the 20th century and the 21st century and indeed it has changed quite a bit strong boundaries ahead of time of what your goals are for both men and women are essential. What I say too many people is I can have sex anytime I want it that is not the issue I want to meet someone that will be a good partner to as the person above said concerning their marriage or their partnership. Remember there are no absolutes I believe we need to give everyone a chance however unfortunately they call them red flags for both men and women they're there for a reason I have found for I have tried them and usually if flags are there it has never ended well and if you think about it they ended. And not well. It's a matter of paying attention in the beginning and knowing what you want and being willing to work towards your life purpose and love yourself as well as date and have fun and not compromise your value system especially right away for you will meet someone that honors your value system and you honor theirs if your compatible, otherwise have fun and don't let us be so hard on ourselves especially those of you that want babies and remember women you can have children without a man in your life I did at 17 years old so really you just need sperm from a bank if you want a child however with family and if that's the case I want you to believe it is going to happen and it will. I am a midwife I deliver babies for a living trust me my daughter was with a man for 9 years from the ages of 20 to 29 she does not use birth control and she never conceived however when they broke up because he was a strict Catholic and she tried and it didn't work out a year later she went to Okay Cupid just for fun well apparently she was having fun having sex within six weeks of meeting her person she was pregnant they have been a partnership for the past five and a half years and have a lovely son. Another great story my mother ,my father died in 2005 when she was 77 funny enough though she met a man through a boyfriend that I had been dating that was 85 my boyfriend was a little younger LOL they fell in love and after 3 months remarried and had a wonderful love affair for four years before she passed away and she was very happy. Love Is Alive all the time from 81 to 16 give yourself time it will happen just do not compromise yourselves you'll never be happy in my experience.
So YT suggested his content to me. He's handsome, yeah. I thought he's one of them guys who will sweep me off my feet. As I was watching the video, he seems to be more of a best friend or an elder brother you're comfortable talking about your men issues to. And he'll be nice but at the same time be blunt and honest about your situation. Mad respect!
I started watching Matthew's videos to help my relationship. His words of wisdom are helping me grow so much and I will be better no matter who else is in the equation ❤
Cheers for this, I've been looking for "dating tips for women by men" for a while now, and I think this has helped. Have you heard people talk about - HootDating.xyz ? Ive heard some incredible things about it and my neighbour got great results with it.
I date multiple guys but if I find one that really stands out only then I'll be semi exclusive lol, but I do tell guys I'm talking to other guys. No point lying about it. The one who really likes me would work slightly harder to be #1
Wow, just wow. In a positive way. After looking in the comments im baffled that there are so many woman who actually have this problem. Maybe it's my surroundings but I started to feel that my way of going out there and trying to find the right woman (even though im not exactly the most extrovert and confident guy) actually leads to me only meeting the wrong woman. I'm actually the type of guy who's more attracted to the woman who DON't go to big parties or flirt around a lot and just enjoy staying at home/chilling out in peace, hang out and simply want to enjoy company. Maybe I should date more online. Anyways: This video makes me very hopeful!
A typical guy will become less attracted if he finds out that the woman is exercising her other available options- even though he may be doing the same - because a typical guy has double standards!
+Mansi Jhingran A typcial guy is not a guy who has more than one or two options. When you ladies go out of your house, you alreday have more than a dozen of options, and they just keep coming.
Mansi Jhingran You've just said that every guy is a creep becuse what, he likes you?(Presumption: you are a women). There is no seduction without being a little creepy. If they are really creepy it's becouse they are lieing to themselfs and you on what they want(they all want to fuck you, if you are hot/sexy), they have problems with full honesty(which are many of them), so try to understand that, before you go around calling men creeps.Try and read some books for better understanding. You will see these are man in need of help (basicily they lack masculinity, becouse they were raiesd poorly, a whole new topic), and not some women labeling them a creep, becuse she just doesnt like/understand him (or her, can go both ways).
+Erosis of common shuttles I know that all men are'nt creeps. Please read my comment again I said most men are creeps not all (so their attention doesn't matter.)
+Mansi Jhingran Uhhhh, I don't think sooo. maybe that's what's going on with you, but none of the men I'm currently dating are creeps. If that's what you're attracting you gotta raise your standards, and check and see what's going on with yourself. We are what we attract.
That's because they both hail from London. It's fascinating just how different the dialects are from one county to the next. On the flip side, if you get two people from the same area and listen to them talk, you would swear they were brothers or something. If you ever listen to Tom Felton and Bill Nighy you can hear the similarity because they're both from Surrey.
I have noticed that the tips I've learned from you makes me attract attention and stand out in rooms with far more attractive woman, being open to be approached makes all the difference. Thanks Matt!
Wawww....thats one of the best message someone told me in my whole life...i am a girl who tries to do everything on my own...and inside i never felt happy abt it...it was like a pain of being inferior to let someone else do my things ever.....but now i will learn to do that...a little more often...i gotto learn to let someone take care of me.... Thanks mathew...u r a mindset transformer...
damn i never knew women watched these to get guys LOL i always thought it was only men who watched these type of vids to get women..damn im kinda glad now
+ahmed hassan hahah thats funny, I watch the same, just for men. Had no idea women watched it too, and 1.8 million views, damn. Thats cool, you do your thing women and we do our :P
Of course women watch these! MY QUESTION is why are you watching these videos!? LOL, I think it's not hard at all to make a girl fall in love with men. It harder for women to make men fall in love.
Prisilia Ramos Men watch this for different reasons though, some watch it to get a girlfriend, some watch it to be better at flirting with girls, some even watch it to "get as many girls as they can" etc. Some men out there though have a real hard time talking to girls because of low self esteem, yet making a girl fall in love with them. So I think it is healthy for them to have these kind of selv-development sources to learn from.
+ahmed hassan Well I've got a man lol But nothing wrong with trying to better yourself! So this popped up in my suggested vids....thought sure... I'll listen to what he has to say! Might be good advice. You never know!
Do you know how brilliant you are Matthew. You are helping me through such a tough phase and experience of my break up immensely! I hadn’t dated anyone for three years and I met a guy, we had been dating for eight months and I completely Felt lost with in myself and people around me my family my best friend they could all see that I was not myself, reason being why I haven’t dated anyone for three years was because I came out of two abusive relationships, but they were physical abuse and this current now except mine was an emotional/ psychological abuser! I have watched so many of your videos and I HONESTLY was having a few weeks of sleepless nights, feelings of loneliness and boredom and just feeling like I lost not a part of myself, but wat I ‘thought to have believed’ a bigger part of my life.. being him! Until watching your videos, you have awakened and shaken me into realisation, that of holding self respect and the needs of my own to be held (not so much the ‘above’ part..but most definitely) before meeting the needs of others! And that is something I new within, always had but I seemed to have forgotten it throughout the psychological abuse being at such a narcissistic level, where I needed an angel like you, well really it HAS BEEN YOU.. my angel to save myself from the destruction caused by my partner! U made me have this strength to walk away, it’s been a week and it is hard going no contact, keeping away from any sight of him (even when he jumps my fence to see me.. I know right!? No respect at all for me whatsoever ever ! I just thought I’d share my gratitude for your work, your speeches & your commitment to helping women like I, myself, who need to hear & acknowledge the things you say as well as acknowledge our own valueble soul self-worth when it comes to having a healthy relationship with a partner! Bless you xx
One thing I would personally add to his bit about the 1-10% of men and women would be this: to also show confidence. Maintaining a decent amount of eye contact while they're talking, comfortable yet strong body language, and a good tone. This can go for both men and women.
Thank you! Not lowering my standards when I know I stand on a higher level! I want a man who is going to be able to stand up next to me or even above me! My man can serve me all he wants, “ I know I can do it myself but it’s more fun having someone do it for me” 😉
Everytime I get hurt, I become a better person for the next guy that comes my way. And now, with all the pain I’ve felt before, it’s easier for me to let go when it’s no longer working.
Butterfly Sinclair I love psychology and human behavior and spent most of my life observing how people were behaving. I am a helper personality also which put me into giving love advice to friends and things like this comes easy to my brain too. Hear a question and can right away see what happened to cause that question and behavior and how to get out of that behavior, or what a question *really* means. He might have been through a lot of relationships but he most likely has seen a whole lot of relationships around him and just spoken to many different people. Maybe reading material too but overall it's a strength in his brain to do this form of problem solving. :)
Ambi Cahira Hi,thanks for your comment,it really resonated with me,l would like to help more people & wonder if you could please help with suggestions re any books or courses that would support that,thank you❤️
Damn this man is smart. I’m subscribing immediately! I also love, love, love how he supports strong woman who express themselves. I struggle with that sometimes so it’s really nice hearing someone say that it’s awesome to be a strong woman.💞🙏🏽
It seem us women are just learning to find balance. I was always a 'co-dependent' in my relationships. Once I realized that, I went to the other end of the scale of being very independent, mostly to ensure that I wouldn't get sucked into another co-dependent relationship. I slowly learned that being independent was just as unhealthy as being co-dependent. And truthfully, the codependence never really stopped. I was just hiding it with my new found 'independence'. My new words today are 'interdependence' and 'autonomy'. To me, the word 'independence' feels separate or exclusive from others. While the words 'interdependence' and 'autonomy' feels more inclusive. In other words, you get to have 'you' and 'someone else' at the same time. You don't complete each other. The only one who can complete you is you. But in an interdependent relationship, two 'whole' people parallel and compliment each other. In this type of relationship you never wonder if the person desires or wants to be with you or not. But if you are wondering, you now have the confidence to graciously question it and even walk away because you are a woman who knows what she wants and makes no apology. Last thing. Matthew, thank you for the comment that its okay if you attract crappy guys. That it shouldn't affect my confidence. I always struggled with this, thinking that if I attracted such a sleaze ball that there must be something wrong with me. Now I feel okay about it. Thanks!
Awesome video. The only point I would disagree with is that I don’t think that we should be physically intimate with multiple people at the same time. One lady asked about this, and Matthew’s response was that it’s ok as long as you stop that when the real guy comes along. I think that being physically intimate with multiple people is dangerous, and can hurt their hearts if we are not interested in them. “Do unto others as you would have done to you.” As a Christian, I believe in waiting for marriage for being intimate like that. I think this also saves people a lot of wasted time as well from being with the wrong person and saves a lot of broken hearts. I think that we are better than just hooking up with people for our sexual gratification as well. But other than this one point, I think this was a great video and super helpful! Thank you! 🙏
Thanks to your videos I've been able to make the most out of guys that just haven't worked out for me. I haven't been in an official relationship yet but I feel much more confident and prepared with Matthew's insight. So thank you!!
I think what he meant was that we should be with somebody that makes you feel happy every day, 7 days a week. Not neccesarily that you spend every day with the guy.
I'm the type of girl that's proactive and I believe myself to be decent looking. I often get rejected, called "fat and ugly", but I believe it is my decision to let it drag me down or shrug it off as "people have their preferences" and move on to the next person. :)
@@BasicallyMatt or they need to just move along and leave her to her life. Everyone has thier own tastes and preferences! She may be fat OR she might not be either. It depends on whom you ask. Some guys like curves while others like twigs.
This guy is like the Buddha of dating. Heterosexual dude here that loves his youtube videos, learns from them, and can't even bring myself to be jealous of his (as he is f'n perfect) because he's so darn sincere and likable!
I’m so glad he does these seminars for men and women, its great because all these people are working on themselves ,as well trying to find a love interest not too just settle but to grow with. It’s really beautiful, also us women don’t even know what we want half the time we have grown up either with a fantasy of how love is or raised to be independent in which that becomes frustrating because you want someone to love you but you don’t even know how to accept that nurturing love because you have that independent nature so deep rooted. 🤷🏻♀️
I like this proactive comment at the 13 minute mark. It's the same for men as well and it is those people that are looking for one another and will (hopefully) find one another. What you are seeking, is seeking you.
Barby Jones It's when he was talking about when a woman thinks that not needing help makes her strong, but in reality we have to realize men and women need each other.
Barby Jones Exactly. I when he said it I never really thought of it as a feminist point until I saw this comment. It fits with feminism, but it applies to any and every woman.
That's true, it's not just about feminism, but I think that his point kind of was. At least in my opinion. Simply because feminists take the most offense when men act like gentlemen because they feel they can do things for themselves. I consider myself a feminist, but I never understood the problems some women had with men just acting out of kindness. I liked his outlook because it shows any woman that she can accept simple gestures and still feel strong, and the man can hold onto his masculinity at the same time.
***** Wow. I don't see how this is related to feminism. I know that men can get intimidated by feminists and strong, decisive, self-sufficient women ; but the problem itself is about trust. Independence is great - but to be completely unable to trust other people, to be unable of just letting go, that shows a terrible weakness. Maybe the person's scared of being hurt, or that things will be messed up, or maybe they don't want to lose face. But this issue concerns both men and women. Then again, I value self-reliance, and don't see much of a fault in it. I don't think you should have to "prove" you're confident and strong by letting go of things you want to do yourself. Similarly, if a guy needs to show off his muscles, ability for compassion, or power, in order to feel "masculine", then HE has a problem with his own strength and confidence. PS: Matthew Hussey is funny and gives a lot of interesting insights, but he also DOES spout a lot of sexist bullshit.
Arе you making thesе mistаkes with уour mаn? twitter.com/1ba03513cb794157a/status/804693412402241537 3 Cоnfidеnt Fеmale Mindsеts That Drivе Guуs Wild Мatthew Hussеу Geet Thе Guу
"If you're attractive, you're not gonna always attract great guys... you're gonna attract some crazies, because you're attractive." DAMN..that's scary, and very true
J Gildz
How would being attractive mean that you're going to attract crazies.
Anybody can and do attract crazies - looks are irrelevant
OG Loc
Hahaha I am nowhere near 50
What has age got to do with it?
So do you think that a when a woman stats dating a man she should see him every single night and every single day and that the man should "look after the woman"?
He's a conman.
If he was short, fat and ugly would you still be taking dating advice from him?
It's quite sad that a man has to travel all the way from England to the US to tell women how to get a man to look after them and pay him money for that useless advice
And YOU criticise ME
One woman asks is it OK to have sex with more than one man at a time and he tells her it is OK
@@ItsNotRealLife the more attractive you tend to look, the more likely you are to attract a VAST majority of people and a lot of them are crazy, desperate, clingy, etc etc.. I've experienced this, so I would know lmao so the more physically attractive you are, then the higher amount of crazies you attract, attracting more crazies than the usual person. Get it?
OG Loc
Why are you being so aggressive and verbally abusive to me?
Incidentally, who were you talking to?
How on earth do you work out I'm insecure you must've just plucked that put of thin air.
Insecure people are the ones who are abusive.
Insecure women are the ones watch such videos listening to, and viciously defending, a man giving them dating advice and them to need to see a man every night and every day and that a man should look after them.
Doesn't sound very secure to me
Sweet Leaf
I do get it and totally agree.
I'm a tall very good looking guy and that's caused me problems over the years.
Men jealous of me
Men thinking I'm after the GFs or vice-versa
Women who, on the surface, appear nice and sweet as mommas home-made apple pie but underneath they were clingy crazies.
The not-so-handsome men don't get to much attention but seem to be the happiest.
In fine now though, I've found THE one.
Not the prettiest girl in the world but she's sexy AF and as great girl too
The problem with most people is we don't love ourselves enough. Loving one's own self is the first step
Totally agree!
Agreed
Yes, I agree that as human beings we all have flaws both physical and behavioral. Nevertheless, how can we forget that human beings are the most precious and absolute best creation of Almighty, regardless of race, religion, gender, and sexual orientation. The entertainment industry and media create so much pressure that we are constantly worried about our outer appearance, and we are constantly fooled by the false hope. Wasting money like water. News flash!!! man is mortal, and so is wrinkle. So far human being is the best creation of Almighty, so it is needless to say that no doctor or plastic surgeon possibly could have done a better job than Almighty himself, right!!!
Farah Kibriya if we don't love and respect ourselves,,no one else will either.
Farah Kibriya I
Am I the only one who whenever listen to this guy feeling so high valued ?
no, you are not the only one :)
absolutely not...I’m going through a difficult love situation that I am trying to end. Everytime I feel myself doubting about my decision, I listen to Mathew!
Me tooo
May be he just makes you realise how amazing you are🙂
Ruchi Sharma thank you, I'm sure you are too
The minute I realized my worth and stopped caring about finding another relationship, men started showing interest.
BS. Sounds like propoganda to me
@@piemoon2488 would it kill you to not be mean and evil like the mainstream and actually be nice for someone other than yourself? I tell ya, selfish people are popping everywhere! 😐
That sounds great sweetie 🤗🤗 never be anyone's slave nor rag. You are your own person and you can do everything by yourself as well cuz you are independent 🥰
He's lying. Young, chaste, submissive, creates peace, follows his lead, takes care of family and house
@@quirogatnonerrat3214 He's lying. Young, chaste, submissive, creates peace, follows his lead, takes care of family and house
Every girl needs a Matthew Hussey in her life.
he's making millions off insecure women. Its just more bullshit men do to further manipulate women. You'll eventually find out he has abused several women himself.
@@Vhfash PARANOID, AREN'T WE.
YET, YOU ARE HERE 🙄
Why?
@@Vhfash you sure have the confidence make that assumption about men, and Mathew hussey....
You're just upset because Mathew hussey is changing the way a woman's role in a relationship should be and what it shouldn't be...
If science says that women are better than men in leadership intelligence and maturity... Then why don't women have the confidence to take the big risks for a change and go make the first move....
women like you are the reason why men don't approach women anymore...
You're just making these assumptions about Mathew hussey, because you're misogynistic, he's helping women being better partners for men... because in a relationship it's about both partners, not one but two...
If you hate him then you are obviously one of those women who thinks, men should be the ones to approach women, men should be the ones to always pay, men should always be the providers and taking care of the women...
But what does the woman offer to the relationship apart from her beauty??? Because beauty fades then what do you have to offer to the table???
Men are life partners, they're not life savers
@@JohnSmith-pl4sf Men should approach women. And several men thankfully still do, including matthew hussey himself. I am sorry you don't have the balls to go after the women you like, and prefer to hide in a corner waiting for women to chase you and buy you flowers.
And calling a woman misogynistic makes no sense. Please educate yourself and look up the definition of misogynistic.
Finally, my comment was about matthew litterally making millions of dollars coaching insecure women on how to handle confused men. And has nothing to do with what you have posted.
But while we are on the topic of your ridiculous post...
Women just need to be brave enough to set standards, and maintain them fiercely. Instead of settling for the BS men peddle, such as "i want women to chase me too" LOL.
If you are not 6'5 with a massive bank account, and a cock to match, please forget the delusion of women chasing you.
Men have always gone after women for the past 3000 years. Just because your diet is now full of estrogen, and mainstream media has convinced you that bravery in a man is not good, and that women should chase after your tiny penis doesn't mean its going to happen.
You are better off watching PORN until you are dead, cause no woman would want a man that doesn't have to BALLS to go after what he wants. FOOL.
"Just because he's a stalker, it doesn't mean he has bad taste!" Lmao. I love it. So many of us judge ourselves for having had bad experiences.
Whats wrong to be a stalker?Well if ur a polite stalker and ur reasons are love and not some creeepy stuff,nothing wrong with that.
Is like insisist to get a job or realise ur dreamsand u try over n over.
Most of couples,including my mother,she didnt liekd my father first and he kind of polite stalker her 6 mnoths and after got married.I heard many of these examples.
@@lazarcatalina1176 if someone doesn't want to be with you and they make that clear but you still insist then you're disrespecting their opinion and valuing what you want over what they want rather than treating them like a fellow human being, this goes for men and women.
😀really?
@@lazarcatalina1176 A polite stalker? 😂 Wtf
He's lying. Young, chaste, submissive, creates peace, follows his lead, takes care of family and house
First level: dependence (someone else to do it). Second level: independence (do it all yourself). Third level: interdependence (teamwork effort). -- “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People” - Dr. Steven R. Covey.
Lichfeldian - Suttonian thanks :)
@@riverdeep399 You’re welcome. :)
But someone doing something for you isn’t teamwork effort
@@Y.HAJ. Too true. That is what I am saying. Doing something together is much better!
@@Y.HAJ. While they're doing something for you, you have a work to do which is show your gratitude and then later also do something for them. It's a give and take circle that never ends, if done right.
“It is strong to be served.” I fkn felt this.
As someone has told me whne a woman is too strong,i can do it by my self is acting masculine.We have to think at very feminine guys who are acting girlie,would u like that?
That person told me,guys testosterone goes down when a woman is masculine or when she is histeric.Increased when she laughs,shes happy and having a positive vibe.
@@lazarcatalina1176 i agree
😭😭😭😭
@@lazarcatalina1176 Its correct. These are concepts of masculine and feminine energies. Masculine energy wants to ground itself through the feminine. This cannot occur if a women does not show her vulnerability. It is how a man would connect with his vulnerability with her ... again masculine energy comes to ground through the feminine.
If a man cannot connect with this vulnerability in this , it does lead to the kind of imbalanced connections Matthew discusses. I find these ideas of masculine feminine energies to be not well understood by either gender. Men are encouraged by society to not be vulnerable for example.
Truth
Haha, this man knows more about women than women know about women.
shieeet ain't that the truth hahaha
Julie Bane >>I want to show you a weird tool that will
give you explosive attraction power around
any man.>>===>>himdesireyou.blogspot.com
Akapoklo Actually he knows more about men than women do so hes teaching them what to do since these women have more compassion to sustain the relationship...keep up!
***** Most people don't like to face any truth at all these days. It's a global disease.
Akapoklo he is Gay I detected on his body language,
This is the only relationship advice person I’ve heard say “do you really WANT that guy?” So many are tips to manipulate men who never call or text or make time into liking you and never call out that maybe those dudes aren’t into you or maybe they suck!
You know... why stick around when he's already showing you who he is... So right... DO I REALLY WANT THAT???
true it's about self esteem not playing games
Exactly.
So very true.
So true!
"It's easy, by the way, to be strong in a relationship when you've never been burnt." ⋆
He's lying. Young, chaste, submissive, creates peace, follows his lead, takes care of family and houses
your competition isn't every other woman, your competition are those who are doing something / playing the game. wow.
We have competition? ...wats meant to be urs will be urs!
Me: **sitting at home eating ice cream** Damn, part of the 90%
Oh shit... I was literally watching this video, paused it to go do something else in the house, came back with an ice cream aaaand WHOOMP there it is 😂😂😂😂
AHHHH, I love you XP
I mean, hi.
lol!!
It's so funny to have found your comment here lol. I love your channel and your videos!!!
+YesReneau OMG! It's you! LOL! :D It's so funny to see that you posted a comment on this video, LOL! :D I'm subscribed to your channel since quite a long time and I also watched a few of your "Harvard" videos! :)
I'm one of those women who aren't doing anything and stay at home eating ice cream, that's why I'm watching this lol.
You are appreciated.
busted..
Joe Tom is being judgemental and rude. Keep your lovely sense of humor and honesty, LoveSpaghettiSmile.
yes i love spaghetti
Zachariah Williams smooth
As I understand them, here are the three confident mindsets: 1) be confident enough to know you’re worth spending time with and being treated well and insist on those things; 2) be strong enough to allow yourself to be taken care of and be vulnerable to being hurt; 3) be decisive enough to commit to being intimate with only one man and be direct enough to get on the same page with him about expectations concerning level of exclusivity/commitment.
I’m literally the type of woman who knows I can do it but like you said “ it’s fun when someone else does it for me” and I thought that literally made me a bad person up until watching this hahaha
He's lying. Young, chaste, submissive, creates peace, follows his lead, takes care of family and house
Why the hell did I as a heterosexual male just watched this?
You wanted to know the 3 mindsets that drive us wild didn't you?
i got curious aswell lol
i kind of wish there was someone like Matthew giving normal talks but for men.
***** you are delusional get out of here and seek help
***** you sound exactly like the other older angry women/ undesirable ones who go crazy cause nobody is giving you attention lol. once you know what to look for its quite easy to spot them.....
It is easy to be confident, when no one has torn you down
It is easy to be strong, when you never been burnt
It is harder when you have reason to be insecure and you’re NOT
I love these lines, thank you thank you this made me feel better about myself
How could you be so young and so wise at the same time? I'm learning so much from watching your videos! Thank you, Matt!
The wisest was though the most shit.
From all of the things he said here, why isn't this top quoted one?:
4:24 "Men need women. Women need men. Life just ain't as fun without them."
Men need women, women need men”. That’s darned right!
God said on GENESIS 2:18 “It is no good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.”
And Genesis 2:24 “ Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”
How about that!!! It’s a command, not a suggestion. Guys, go get your gal now.
women cant survive without men, and no He's lying. Young, chaste, submissive, creates peace, follows his lead, takes care of family and house
Why am I watching this? I don't even get out of my house! LOL! XD
lol you're not the only one XP
I want a man now! lol!
Andreia Guerrero Let's hope that some attractive sexy guys will come and find us in our safe homes ;D
If only I was born a woman. I guess I'll just have to give up on love.
Andreia Guerrero never give up on love! ♥
Ladies, you can never get THE guy, just as we can't get THE girl, but we can find someone to spend our life with if we are reasonable, capable and care about ourselves first...then go looking, otherwise we are looking to someone else to fix our shit, which always ends badly.
+Alistair Kinnear Best advice for everyone
Alistair Kinnear 😂 😂
ehhh... demand all week's atention
Make men your slave by making him do your chores that you could perfectly do
build fake walls
Well put👍
Alistair Kinnear Hello Alistair I totally agree with your comment I'm newly single and trying to come to terms with my loss
Imagine meeting someone who understood the dustiest corners of your mixed- up soul....
Lacey Harris I did! It was scary to trust enough to show off the dusty corners of the mixed up soul but he saw it, loves it, and both cherishes it and by accepting and loving those parts of me they are mending on their own. I used to not get the "you complete me" talk but it's not that they are what you are not and like magic you feel whole, but that the love and acceptance makes your broken pieces heal, making you feels more completed and whole than you ever did before. His acceptance of all that I am gave me so much confidence and security. He gained the same from me too because we both are domestic abuse victims and both were broken birds but with freedom of never fearing a bad reaction out of the other one... we now have something incredible. Guys like this exist!
*puke*
Women are better at that in general.
When you find the “right” guy, you and him will automatically want to be together ALL the time.
IKR, one thing will just lead to another NATURALLY.
Ao basically just like finding your bestfriend
True love is not complicated.
Yes to the best friend sentiment :)
Right
This boosted my confidence as a woman! Honestly, there are so many truths that more people need to hear in this video!
3:23 Matthew puts into perspective 3 levels of a woman. The highest level is a woman who knows she can get through life on her own but still allows other people to help her simply because it is more fun and they can recognize that someone else wants to be of service to them. Other people really do get fulfillment out of helping you and that is why I always allow them to help me if they want to. I love this video!
I will practice it! Normally I don't do it. :)
I wish I could understand all the video, but listen to me is more complicated than read!
Good luck to us all! :)
+Kira M So you are the highest level of woman?
What are the other two levels....?
+Alistair Kinnear Yes I am. It is all explained in this video. You can click on this if you want to go straight to it
---> 3:44
He's lying. Young, chaste, submissive, creates peace, follows his lead, takes care of family and house
So good! 👍
"i am exercising my options, when i find someone i like im gonna start focussing on that person. nou my options still give me confidence because they remind me that i am a attractive woman. but im not gonna exercise those options when im actually focussing on this person i care about."
♡
"Just because he is a stalker, doesn't mean he has bad taste"
That's a great line.
I love how Matthew interacts with the group, and how down to earth he is!
Matt, where are the guys like you??
i could listen to this guy talk for hours and hours...
Lea Zoran can you imagine the mind fuck dating this guy ? Hahah . Passs . But he’s pretty spot on , not gonna lie .
Yesssssss omgggg my gawd
Lea Zoran gay
Omg. You are freaking fantastic. I love hearing a self-assured man explain the disconnect happening between "strong" women and good men. I especially love the response to the woman wanting more of her guy's time but not recognizing she chose a non-committal guy to begin with. Love this.
He's lying. Young, chaste, submissive, creates peace, follows his lead, takes care of family and house
When you finally said " you are in the top 1%" , I was smiling from ear to ear! You have boosted my confidence so convincingly! Thanks a lot!
Matthew : "what type of men do you wanna be with"
me :whispering:: you.
Of course!
Yass 😂
Lmao
Hahaha. Love this!
C Savina
Exactly my point but his fake accent grates on my nerves but I managed to last through it.
He's what we would call a Cunard Yank (British sailors who sail to NY and come back speaking in a strange fake American accent)
he knows more about my gender than me lol
AGREED
+Lauren Doubtful. He also doesn't ever talk about men (or women) who have Cluster B personality disorders, like Narcissists, Borderlines, Sociopaths, Psychopaths. Those disordered individuals who look just like you and me, and can pull it off confidently for 2-3-4 months before their social masks slips and the nightmare emerges.
This guy is a bit dangerous ONLY because of what he doesn't know and what he doesn't address in human behavior. Then, he goes around talking from a place of authority and knowledge that he doesn't really have.
Best advice...follow your gut instinct with people, male or female. Those gut instinct do not lie. They may not be clear as to why you're having them, but do not ignore them. They are spot on every time.
+le th My instinct tells me to forget the women who didn't go out with me, to meet new ones, to get into the friend zone only with the ones I'm not attracted to! With the ones I'm attracted to I need to be sarcastic and flirty with them, to not complement them much, to give indirect sexual remarks, to touch firmly on the hips when they laugh damn hard to be confident, but to work out and muscle up just for me not to attract them of course, and to be emotionally independent from them, to not care so much about their validation of me as much as I care about my own personality but to pay attention to them when they complain about something important!
'yttrium
lD7+Macnavor
Isn't the Forer effect a powerful thing?
He’s blunt as hell. I love it
" a level above that, i know i can do it myself but it's a lot fun when someone else does it"
this kinda hit me yea
Just cause he's a stalker doesn't mean he has bad taste XDDDD
OMG AHHHAHAHA
Ummmm lol. ok. :)
😂
Here is how I choose my women,
Mindset 1: If she doesn't offer to pay, Bye Felicia
Mindset 2: If she tells me what to do, where to go, how to live, I get rid of her. It's okay sometimes but not every day.
Mindset 3: Spending most of the time at clubs/bars like 3 visits a week, Girls night out is not a Hall Pass. I m single and I go out to clubs. I've met so many married women and girls in relationships who want to bang. I rejected this woman one night, we were having a great conversation. I spotted the ring and questioned her about it. She left me and moved to the dance floor and started making out hard with this African American dude. So, I don't want someone I invest to do shit like that. Don't be that "Hot girl at the bar, who everyone wants to fuck". Have some self-respect, There are a ton of other places to have fun.
PS - I don't have anything against African American men, It's just that 'most' of these guys who hang outside of nightclubs and bars are sober and mostly take viagra, that was something two guys told me during small talk. They're there to take advantage of drunk women as they have a better mental consciousness over a drunk person. Especially Huntington Beach, West Hollywood and DTLA.
I’ve been binge watching your videos for the past year whenever I’m feeling a bit insecure or unsure of myself and my feelings or the situations that I put myself in... I appreciate you “over delivering” you definitely always do that. You have the ability to nail the problem so quickly and read the person or situation right off the batt. It’s impressive and the way you say it makes it so clear and your advice feels so genuine even through video! Love you! Thanks for enough videos to help me for the next few months! 😍🙌🏽
This is so trueee!
He's lying. Young, chaste, submissive, creates peace, follows his lead, takes care of family and house
Exactly my thoughts!!!
1:19 she only has him one night a week 2:28 a girl doing things for herself 5:00 going off of past experiences to judge a new man 7:18 should you date one person at a time? 10:23 asking a guy if he is taken or not 10:45 a girl attracts good guys and bad guys at the same time
Holy crap, wasn't sure what I was expecting, but Matthew is on point. Married 14 years to a great guy--wonderful daddy--we fight like cats and dogs at times but man, I cannot imagine life without him. Can I be happy on my own? Sure can, but as Mr. Hussey said, the kids and hubby are so so so much fun. We both ask each other for help from time to time. He's a massive IT brain so he helps me with my websites. I am a writer, I help him with his resume or when he has a big work-related presentation. I recently fell ill and learned I had a rare autoimmune disorder and he was all in, right there! Love is hard work but it is such a win win. Homeboy is so young to be this wise. Tell it brother, we DO need each other.
when he said "no strong guy is gonna wanna be around a woman who won't let him take care of you" made me fall for him holy shit
11:45-12:10 Great point. If you're generally attractive, you're gonna attract EVERYBODY including the guys you don't want. There's always a negative to every positive.
All bears like honey.
I agree that a woman needs a man as much as man needs a woman. If you both agree that you need each other in your life then you'll gonna start an incredible relationship in your life.
no one "needs" anyone, but it's nice to have companionship, sure, especially for sex
well, in fact, many men need another man, so ....
He's lying. Young, chaste, submissive, creates peace, follows his lead, takes care of family and house
@@crisj7704 He's lying. Young, chaste, submissive, creates peace, follows his lead, takes care of family and house
“Most women aren’t doing anything......they are sitting at home eating icecream” Me: *looks over at the Ben and Jerry’s on my bed* welp.....I’m gonna die alone 😂
Nicole Kornhaus 😂😂😂
hey girl...ben and jerry...are here too! LMBO>>
Girl I sometimes why dating is so complicated, so many rules 😩😩 ice cream is my best friend 😉
@@rosetabekum8690 the rules get me cringy
Nicole Kornhaus no, you’re not! You’ve just noted what you are doing and what you aren’t doing. Now, you’re going to change up your game, play by your rules, and be your own, natural self! You go thus. Go get em!
How can anyone watch a video of him and not fall madly in love
+jennifer vets easily...I dont like the way he looks.....his tone of voice.....thanks god people have different taste!
Oh, thank you very much. I appreciate it! :)
I know right I'm in love
Some of people grow up in dysfunctional family relationship, i personally grow up in family where my parent are really cold, distant, argue, dont work toward problem. Honestly i don't have a good sample to learn and in that time i dont know why my dating in my early life really bad until i learn and solve all my internal problem and believe and it is getting better. But some of people they lucky, they are warm and healthy family, good for you. Great video, keep up in what you do. For me, it improve once i learn, people skill, understand them, non attachment attitude etc.
I love your ambition
You are an ethereal healthy father figure who put time in to educate his own daughter how to preserve their value and why. My father treated me like a princess but never taught me how to treat myself like one so thank you
some men and women are just too needy and won't allow a person to be to themselves . People have lives and need to keep their identity and continues of personal growth....If I have a boyfriend I personally cannot be around him non stop or see him all week. i prefer my "me" time.
That is the most selfish thing you can say ! If you love a person you wish to have him around you all time! "me" time should transform in "we" time even if you are just being lazy or just buying socks! Yeah we work, we have needs that we can help each other! Why should you just make him frustrated when he needs you by his side you just say "Sorry dude is ME time today"...
This is selfish, then why have a boyfriend.
ewa ewwa Or we can split them. Both 'we' and 'me' time can exist you know. Just have to discuss that with your date/partner.
Why even have a boyfriend then? Just have fuckbuddies.
I get it, I ended a year relationship yofsy because of the neediness that was consistent to them not listening to allowing me space. You're valid in needing your own life, they tend to move as quickly as they can and pretend they don't realise that's how trust is broken. It's off putting when they give up their entire life, time and hobbies just to be around you and put their great difficulties of giving this all up, on you when you tell them that, that is not what healthy relationships are. You did good
i love this guy.he's speaking some truth.finally somebody with a rational mindset
He's lying. Young, chaste, submissive, creates peace, follows his lead, takes care of family and houses
Am I the only guy watching these videos because he's saying what we're all thinking
Wow I so needed to watch this video. I was heavily doubting myself and when Matthew said "why having bad experiences make you lose confidence? " It really made me think. There's still so much to explore there's so much out there for me.
Distracted by how horrifying Matthews handwriting is. I've found his flaw lol 😂
sweetsalara everyone has flaws don’t be putting a man on a high scale
sweetsalara it just means he thinks quicker than he can write
🤣😂🤣😂😂🤣😂
I think is the only flaw. Everything else is perfect...
Your advice is always so so helpful. Everything you say is encouraging to just be myself, be happy in my own skin, take myself seriously, love myself and that I am in power of whoever I choose to let into my life and how they treat me. Thanks. You're the bomb!!! Guys do not walk all over me anymore.
Mind blowing to know, as a guy, that women are facing same problems as us. We are socially disconnected, having less and less sex and not loving like our parents and grandparents did just because of unachievable high expectations.
It's not high expectations, it's misunderstanding about the opposite gender and about reality and how love work in general.
Mind blowing is the word.
It's socail media/apps have given everyone the illusion of choice and turned us into a throw away generation.
.
Someone says or does one little thing 'wrong', we can drop them, knowing the next one is only a swipe away.....
I have a code I do not date any cheaters or beaters a lot of married men forget that if they are going after me that makes him a cheater so what would make me think that if they were with me that they would not cheat on me and not only that but the wife finds out that their husbands looking they become a beater towards me LOL but very true. I have been dating in the 20th century and the 21st century and indeed it has changed quite a bit strong boundaries ahead of time of what your goals are for both men and women are essential. What I say too many people is I can have sex anytime I want it that is not the issue I want to meet someone that will be a good partner to as the person above said concerning their marriage or their partnership. Remember there are no absolutes I believe we need to give everyone a chance however unfortunately they call them red flags for both men and women they're there for a reason I have found for I have tried them and usually if flags are there it has never ended well and if you think about it they ended. And not well. It's a matter of paying attention in the beginning and knowing what you want and being willing to work towards your life purpose and love yourself as well as date and have fun and not compromise your value system especially right away for you will meet someone that honors your value system and you honor theirs if your compatible, otherwise have fun and don't let us be so hard on ourselves especially those of you that want babies and remember women you can have children without a man in your life I did at 17 years old so really you just need sperm from a bank if you want a child however with family and if that's the case I want you to believe it is going to happen and it will. I am a midwife I deliver babies for a living trust me my daughter was with a man for 9 years from the ages of 20 to 29 she does not use birth control and she never conceived however when they broke up because he was a strict Catholic and she tried and it didn't work out a year later she went to Okay Cupid just for fun well apparently she was having fun having sex within six weeks of meeting her person she was pregnant they have been a partnership for the past five and a half years and have a lovely son. Another great story my mother ,my father died in 2005 when she was 77 funny enough though she met a man through a boyfriend that I had been dating that was 85 my boyfriend was a little younger LOL they fell in love and after 3 months remarried and had a wonderful love affair for four years before she passed away and she was very happy. Love Is Alive all the time from 81 to 16 give yourself time it will happen just do not compromise yourselves you'll never be happy in my experience.
Oh shut the fuck up.
So YT suggested his content to me. He's handsome, yeah. I thought he's one of them guys who will sweep me off my feet.
As I was watching the video, he seems to be more of a best friend or an elder brother you're comfortable talking about your men issues to. And he'll be nice but at the same time be blunt and honest about your situation.
Mad respect!
Thank you to your parents and especially to your mom for bringing YOU into this world 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
I started watching Matthew's videos to help my relationship. His words of wisdom are helping me grow so much and I will be better no matter who else is in the equation ❤
🤔💯👍. Maybe I'm awkward but ...I believe in only courting one guy and have eyes for him only.
Cheers for this, I've been looking for "dating tips for women by men" for a while now, and I think this has helped. Have you heard people talk about - HootDating.xyz ? Ive heard some incredible things about it and my neighbour got great results with it.
Same I talk with one persone and if it doesn't work out I move one...
Yes but like good movies taught us you gotta have the other players around for the game to work.
ChristinaMladucky 4Jesus247 yep.
No guilt to carry, once you settle down, it's all clean and simple. :)
I date multiple guys but if I find one that really stands out only then I'll be semi exclusive lol, but I do tell guys I'm talking to other guys. No point lying about it. The one who really likes me would work slightly harder to be #1
Thank you for pointing out so succinctly the glaring mistake that even smart women make! "I can do it myself."
Micki Allen
Don’t you think that you can actually do it more better with a man beside you
You didn’t understand at all. He isn’t shaming he is saying that women obviously can, but it’s more interesting when they let someone help.
Not a GlaRing MiStAkE. Thank you 😶.
"It's harder, it's more of a challenge, when you have had reasons to be insecure and you are not"
Wow, just wow. In a positive way. After looking in the comments im baffled that there are so many woman who actually have this problem. Maybe it's my surroundings but I started to feel that my way of going out there and trying to find the right woman (even though im not exactly the most extrovert and confident guy) actually leads to me only meeting the wrong woman. I'm actually the type of guy who's more attracted to the woman who DON't go to big parties or flirt around a lot and just enjoy staying at home/chilling out in peace, hang out and simply want to enjoy company. Maybe I should date more online. Anyways: This video makes me very hopeful!
He is clearing out the mix of emotions people have in general and wr.t. dating, applies to both genders. Perfect analysis and finding the core issue
A typical guy will become less attracted if he finds out that the woman is exercising her other available options- even though he may be doing the same - because a typical guy has double standards!
+Mansi Jhingran A typcial guy is not a guy who has more than one or two options. When you ladies go out of your house, you alreday have more than a dozen of options, and they just keep coming.
+Erosis of common shuttles Women may get more attention but most of those men who are giving attention are creeps.
Mansi Jhingran You've just said that every guy is a creep becuse what, he likes you?(Presumption: you are a women). There is no seduction without being a little creepy. If they are really creepy it's becouse they are lieing to themselfs and you on what they want(they all want to fuck you, if you are hot/sexy), they have problems with full honesty(which are many of them), so try to understand that, before you go around calling men creeps.Try and read some books for better understanding. You will see these are man in need of help (basicily they lack masculinity, becouse they were raiesd poorly, a whole new topic), and not some women labeling them a creep, becuse she just doesnt like/understand him (or her, can go both ways).
+Erosis of common shuttles I know that all men are'nt creeps. Please read my comment again I said most men are creeps not all (so their attention doesn't matter.)
+Mansi Jhingran Uhhhh, I don't think sooo. maybe that's what's going on with you, but none of the men I'm currently dating are creeps. If that's what you're attracting you gotta raise your standards, and check and see what's going on with yourself. We are what we attract.
He sounds so much like Daniel Radcliffe. Not just the way his british accent is, but also his voice
That's because they both hail from London. It's fascinating just how different the dialects are from one county to the next. On the flip side, if you get two people from the same area and listen to them talk, you would swear they were brothers or something. If you ever listen to Tom Felton and Bill Nighy you can hear the similarity because they're both from Surrey.
They kinda look the same too.
Carmine Chouloute i was thinking that too hehe
True.i fine so too.
im english and no he doesn't! This is a real London-ish accent, Dan is wayyy posher! This dude doesn't finish his r's
He is so right about being proactive! I have been getting out more and talking and it's working!
Women like confident men.
Men like confident women. 💪😇🤗😊🙂😁😎
men like pretty women
@@baronss7499 exactly and I as a woman like shy guys so much more xD
Men like confident women but to add to that... Men want a woman who will let him take care of her to a certain extent
Agree!
I thought that was the case until he threw me away lol.
I love him. Now he needs to teach guys how to be like him haha.
If anyone here needs a loaf of bread I'm your loaf, I have given my fair share of bread in my day.
I know something that would make you even butter
@@niknic9703 :)
@Love is the Key Beautiful :D
I have noticed that the tips I've learned from you makes me attract attention and stand out in rooms with far more attractive woman, being open to be approached makes all the difference. Thanks Matt!
I feel I'm in that top 1%... proud of all the work I've done!
Wawww....thats one of the best message someone told me in my whole life...i am a girl who tries to do everything on my own...and inside i never felt happy abt it...it was like a pain of being inferior to let someone else do my things ever.....but now i will learn to do that...a little more often...i gotto learn to let someone take care of me.... Thanks mathew...u r a mindset transformer...
damn i never knew women watched these to get guys
LOL i always thought it was only men who watched these type of vids to get women..damn im kinda glad now
+ahmed hassan hahah thats funny, I watch the same, just for men. Had no idea women watched it too, and 1.8 million views, damn. Thats cool, you do your thing women and we do our :P
+ahmed hassan thumbs up! LOL
Of course women watch these! MY QUESTION is why are you watching these videos!? LOL, I think it's not hard at all to make a girl fall in love with men. It harder for women to make men fall in love.
Prisilia Ramos Men watch this for different reasons though, some watch it to get a girlfriend, some watch it to be better at flirting with girls, some even watch it to "get as many girls as they can" etc. Some men out there though have a real hard time talking to girls because of low self esteem, yet making a girl fall in love with them. So I think it is healthy for them to have these kind of selv-development sources to learn from.
+ahmed hassan Well I've got a man lol But nothing wrong with trying to better yourself! So this popped up in my suggested vids....thought sure... I'll listen to what he has to say! Might be good advice. You never know!
80% comments are from women sitting at home and eating icecream😂
Am having a Break up papaya
Ok my defense I ate fruit lol
no i'm proactive but i meet only crazies, so actually sitting home is not that bad lol
That means smth
Do you know how brilliant you are Matthew. You are helping me through such a tough phase and experience of my break up immensely! I hadn’t dated anyone for three years and I met a guy, we had been dating for eight months and I completely Felt lost with in myself and people around me my family my best friend they could all see that I was not myself, reason being why I haven’t dated anyone for three years was because I came out of two abusive relationships, but they were physical abuse and this current now except mine was an emotional/ psychological abuser! I have watched so many of your videos and I HONESTLY was having a few weeks of sleepless nights, feelings of loneliness and boredom and just feeling like I lost not a part of myself, but wat I ‘thought to have believed’ a bigger part of my life.. being him! Until watching your videos, you have awakened and shaken me into realisation, that of holding self respect and the needs of my own to be held (not so much the ‘above’ part..but most definitely) before meeting the needs of others! And that is something I new within, always had but I seemed to have forgotten it throughout the psychological abuse being at such a narcissistic level, where I needed an angel like you, well really it HAS BEEN YOU.. my angel to save myself from the destruction caused by my partner! U made me have this strength to walk away, it’s been a week and it is hard going no contact, keeping away from any sight of him (even when he jumps my fence to see me.. I know right!? No respect at all for me whatsoever ever ! I just thought I’d share my gratitude for your work, your speeches & your commitment to helping women like I, myself, who need to hear & acknowledge the things you say as well as acknowledge our own valueble soul self-worth when it comes to having a healthy relationship with a partner! Bless you xx
One thing I would personally add to his bit about the 1-10% of men and women would be this: to also show confidence. Maintaining a decent amount of eye contact while they're talking, comfortable yet strong body language, and a good tone. This can go for both men and women.
Thank you! Not lowering my standards when I know I stand on a higher level! I want a man who is going to be able to stand up next to me or even above me! My man can serve me all he wants, “ I know I can do it myself but it’s more fun having someone do it for me” 😉
When he said the other 90% are at home eating ice cream.. I was literally eating a banana split lol...(side eye, putting the ice cream down) lol
I thought I was the only one eating ice cream at that part! LOL
root beer float for me! ha!
Everytime I get hurt, I become a better person for the next guy that comes my way. And now, with all the pain I’ve felt before, it’s easier for me to let go when it’s no longer working.
Sitting here like damn eveything he says is so right. Has he been through a shit ton of relationships or what?. He's super smart.
Butterfly Sinclair I love psychology and human behavior and spent most of my life observing how people were behaving. I am a helper personality also which put me into giving love advice to friends and things like this comes easy to my brain too. Hear a question and can right away see what happened to cause that question and behavior and how to get out of that behavior, or what a question *really* means. He might have been through a lot of relationships but he most likely has seen a whole lot of relationships around him and just spoken to many different people. Maybe reading material too but overall it's a strength in his brain to do this form of problem solving. :)
He’s a good psychologist.
Ambi Cahira Hi,thanks for your comment,it really resonated with me,l would like to help more people & wonder if you could please help with suggestions re any books or courses that would support that,thank you❤️
Damn this man is smart. I’m subscribing immediately! I also love, love, love how he supports strong woman who express themselves. I struggle with that sometimes so it’s really nice hearing someone say that it’s awesome to be a strong woman.💞🙏🏽
It seem us women are just learning to find balance. I was always a 'co-dependent' in my relationships. Once I realized that, I went to the other end of the scale of being very independent, mostly to ensure that I wouldn't get sucked into another co-dependent relationship. I slowly learned that being independent was just as unhealthy as being co-dependent. And truthfully, the codependence never really stopped. I was just hiding it with my new found 'independence'. My new words today are 'interdependence' and 'autonomy'. To me, the word 'independence' feels separate or exclusive from others. While the words 'interdependence' and 'autonomy' feels more inclusive. In other words, you get to have 'you' and 'someone else' at the same time. You don't complete each other. The only one who can complete you is you. But in an interdependent relationship, two 'whole' people parallel and compliment each other. In this type of relationship you never wonder if the person desires or wants to be with you or not. But if you are wondering, you now have the confidence to graciously question it and even walk away because you are a woman who knows what she wants and makes no apology.
Last thing. Matthew, thank you for the comment that its okay if you attract crappy guys. That it shouldn't affect my confidence. I always struggled with this, thinking that if I attracted such a sleaze ball that there must be something wrong with me. Now I feel okay about it. Thanks!
Matt is SO good at what he does. Thanks, Matt! :)
Awesome video. The only point I would disagree with is that I don’t think that we should be physically intimate with multiple people at the same time. One lady asked about this, and Matthew’s response was that it’s ok as long as you stop that when the real guy comes along. I think that being physically intimate with multiple people is dangerous, and can hurt their hearts if we are not interested in them. “Do unto others as you would have done to you.” As a Christian, I believe in waiting for marriage for being intimate like that. I think this also saves people a lot of wasted time as well from being with the wrong person and saves a lot of broken hearts. I think that we are better than just hooking up with people for our sexual gratification as well. But other than this one point, I think this was a great video and super helpful! Thank you! 🙏
Women like you I love because you care about other peoples feelings
My biggest problem is that I don't know how to let a man do things for me or take care of me. I never had that.
Your biceps are talking to me 🤦🏽♀️❤️
Dutch Bitch lmfao girl same 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Dutch Bitch 🤣🤣🤤
Lol! Only thing I looked at in the video
Dutch Bitch 😂😂
Hells yeah!
I've always liked Matthew Hussey, a high integrity guy with sage advice.
Thanks to your videos I've been able to make the most out of guys that just haven't worked out for me. I haven't been in an official relationship yet but I feel much more confident and prepared with Matthew's insight. So thank you!!
I'm sorry seeing a man 7 days a week is way too much for me. Perhaps 4 - 5 days but 7 would exhaust me. I need space.
!
Don't have sex until you are married, or you are going to hell!
Katharina von Sachsen-Coburg und Gotha The burden of proof is on the person who makes a claim. Please your claim.
Katharina von Sachsen-Coburg und Gotha I would rather go to hell for living the way i am comfortable with, than go to heaven for being a hypocrite.
I think what he meant was that we should be with somebody that makes you feel happy every day, 7 days a week. Not neccesarily that you spend every day with the guy.
I'm the type of girl that's proactive and I believe myself to be decent looking.
I often get rejected, called "fat and ugly", but I believe it is my decision to let it drag me down or shrug it off as "people have their preferences" and move on to the next person. :)
Lyth Fae if they call you fat there is a reason. You need to lose some weight
@@BasicallyMatt or they need to just move along and leave her to her life. Everyone has thier own tastes and preferences! She may be fat OR she might not be either. It depends on whom you ask. Some guys like curves while others like twigs.
Keep that confidence girlie!! Don't listen to those criticisms
Jeni Watkins No one likes fat people unless they have some weird creepy fetish.
@@BasicallyMatt DAMN
This guy is like the Buddha of dating. Heterosexual dude here that loves his youtube videos, learns from them, and can't even bring myself to be jealous of his (as he is f'n perfect) because he's so darn sincere and likable!
"Just because he has a stalker doesn't mean he has bad taste."
HAHAHAHHHAHAHAA
I’m so glad he does these seminars for men and women, its great because all these people are working on themselves ,as well trying to find a love interest not too just settle but to grow with. It’s really beautiful, also us women don’t even know what we want half the time we have grown up either with a fantasy of how love is or raised to be independent in which that becomes frustrating because you want someone to love you but you don’t even know how to accept that nurturing love because you have that independent nature so deep rooted. 🤷🏻♀️
He only does these for women - desperate women
How to get the guy.. nope. How to get Matt Hussey, I would buy that book
I like this proactive comment at the 13 minute mark. It's the same for men as well and it is those people that are looking for one another and will (hopefully) find one another.
What you are seeking, is seeking you.
I love his brutal but sincere honesty
be proactive and do things with good heart 👍
Well said, Lun Meo! :)
The cast of Married At First Sight needs him lmao
Love your take on feminism. Great point.
Barby Jones
It's when he was talking about when a woman thinks that not needing help makes her strong, but in reality we have to realize men and women need each other.
Barby Jones
Exactly. I when he said it I never really thought of it as a feminist point until I saw this comment. It fits with feminism, but it applies to any and every woman.
That's true, it's not just about feminism, but I think that his point kind of was. At least in my opinion. Simply because feminists take the most offense when men act like gentlemen because they feel they can do things for themselves. I consider myself a feminist, but I never understood the problems some women had with men just acting out of kindness. I liked his outlook because it shows any woman that she can accept simple gestures and still feel strong, and the man can hold onto his masculinity at the same time.
***** Wow. I don't see how this is related to feminism. I know that men can get intimidated by feminists and strong, decisive, self-sufficient women ; but the problem itself is about trust. Independence is great - but to be completely unable to trust other people, to be unable of just letting go, that shows a terrible weakness. Maybe the person's scared of being hurt, or that things will be messed up, or maybe they don't want to lose face. But this issue concerns both men and women.
Then again, I value self-reliance, and don't see much of a fault in it. I don't think you should have to "prove" you're confident and strong by letting go of things you want to do yourself. Similarly, if a guy needs to show off his muscles, ability for compassion, or power, in order to feel "masculine", then HE has a problem with his own strength and confidence.
PS: Matthew Hussey is funny and gives a lot of interesting insights, but he also DOES spout a lot of sexist bullshit.
AastryBrocolirose So much sexist bullshit. Good lord. So much of what he's saying could have come from the 1950's.
I'm sitting at home eating ice cream :)
Are you wearing stretchy pants?
Arе you making thesе mistаkes with уour mаn? twitter.com/1ba03513cb794157a/status/804693412402241537 3 Cоnfidеnt Fеmale Mindsеts That Drivе Guуs Wild Мatthew Hussеу Geet Thе Guу
Me too😁
Lol eating grapes
Pretty Little Lyre read your comment as I️ finished my magnum 😂
He's like Hitch for chicks. He sounds like Daniel Radcliffe and looks like Ryan Gosling.