I was Navy from 17 to 25 during OEF after 9/11. I lived in the ocean, the real middle of nowhere, for 159 days during the war. If you want to see terrifying and awe struck at the same time, witness a storm in the north Atlantic with waves at 60 ft tall and lightning streaming all around you while you rush to carry chains and tie down the birds on deck. The wind goes in every direction at once sometimes and it freezes you in place, or at least that's what it felt like. I have also seen the ocean so calm it was like a mirror, and you could not tell the sky from the ocean without looking at the wake. It was the most amazing experience of my life and I am dam proud to be a US Sailor. A man should be so lucky.
My Dad was in the Navy in the late 80s / early 90s and tells similar stories. He says they’d be in a huge storm looking at waves bigger and taller than you could imagine and the only thing scarier is knowing the same thing is happening when it’s pitch black. You’re just along for the ride.
Someone's paying attention. As someone who is born X raised from hawai'i thats 1 of 2 things we try to tell them and also if the rocks are wet don't stand there. I rescued my fair share of tourists who don't listen to us locals 🤦🏾♂️
Knew a guy that drowned our freshman year of college. Went to high school with him. He was a star athlete. One of the most athletic guys I’ve ever seen. Grew up swimming. He drowned one day in a lake. That taught me a valuable lesson. No one is too good to drown. Always respect the water.
I think he is likeable he is just not funny. I have tried watching his stuff and just cannot bring myself to keep viewing for more than a minute or two.
When you’re caught in a rip tide never swim against it. Swim left or right of it. Keep in mind some of rip currents can be wide. So don’t panic if it takes out a little bit. The most important thing is to conserve as much energy as you can while swimming laterally.
Big fans of both of you. I'm a Colorado Native. Mountains dont scare me. I've been trained to survive in the Mountains. But Iam TERRIFIED of the ocean. What happened to Segura happened to me almost to a 'T" i was in Daytona ( strong swimmer since I was a kid ) And in a split second I was swept out to sea. Like 50 yards off the Coast absolutely terrified! I saw life guards jumping off their chairs just as remembered ( just like Segura said ) just basically go limp and let the tide take you in... Sorry, for the long-winded post.
If a shark ever gets a hold of you and pulls you under water, try to reason with it and call the police immediately. This is why you should always have a waterproof phone.
Nothing scarier than being in the ocean and realizing there are no fish around, *I'm FUCKED*, IS A REAL FEAR REACTION that came to mind as he spoke it. What an amazing comedian without even trying to be funny he still kills you. No pun intended.
An uncle once wrestled a 7' Bull Shark that had bit his nephews arm off. Dragged it to the shore where a ranger shot it in the head. The uncle cut the 🦈 open to get his nephews arm. Was able to retrieve it and get it to the hospital in time to be reattached. Oh it happened in Florida
I've wrestled a 30 inch jumbo Koi fish from off of my foot while wearing a pair of Stacey Adams dress shoe when I tripped and fell into a Koi pond at a Japanese restaurant. It was horrific!
i’ve lived in fl my entire life & i always tell people to check the current before they swim. if you’re here, they send out rip current warnings so i’m not sure why people aren’t getting the warnings or taking them seriously
The lady that lost her leg by the great white that was swimming off the cruise ship. Crazy watching it come up from the blue to grab her and people screaming. like a movie.
Just seeing this footage alone upsets me genuinely. Does anyone else have that? I mean i feel like wtf do you even want to watch that or have a show about it because its not worth it type of upset.
It should upset you. It means you aren't a psychopath. But you should also watch things like this anyway so that you don't have any illusions about what the world is like and how quickly life can end. That dude likely thought he was going to go home, eat dinner, have sex, wake up tomorrow, answer some emails, send some videos to his friends. Nope. Fish turds. He became fish turds. And really that's the ultimate question in life and death: What kind of turds will you end up being?
I was caught in a riptide in California a couple years back. Was terrified when all of a sudden all the sand beneath my feet was gone and I quickly remembered you need to go around it basically and swim back. And I'm a strong swimmer who grew up swimming in Colorado rapids. Thankfully did not experience it while in the méditerranéen..
Having grown up on the Pacific Ocean it was impressed upon us that our playground is the single most dangerous "living organism" extent. One of the strangest sensations is losing sight of land. Especially on a small craft. You become cellular, insignificant. The greatest attraction of surfing is that cooperative dance in/on this incredible destructive force that almost killed me a half dozen times...
Is English a second language for you or do you just insist on speaking poetically despite being really bad at it? Speak plainly, like a normal person. Save the flowery prose for your blog
The ocean is terrifying. Not sure why people swim in it. Not a fan of lakes either. Just deep deep deep murky water that you cant see what's in there and is slimy and pokey and scrapey all at the same time while having giant beasts in there that can swim very fast and are very powerful. No thanks. Beautiful to stand on shore and look at though.
While commercially fishing salmon in Alaska we thought we had a big group of fish,It was instead a seven foot shark!My boss was on top of the motor screaming at me to get it out of the boat!
As an Australian I was always taught to swim parallel to the beach when caught in a rip. Then when you're out of it swim back in, don't try to go back in the same way.
Here’s the thing, you do live near it, you were taught some basics, and your type is also never the ones drowning. It’s the people visiting that don’t live near and never had one word of advice needed taught to them because they are from waaayyy inland. Duh, simple concept tho huh? 😉🫣😂
Just a few weeks ago, one of the best and most popular athletes that the University of Arkansas has ever had, quarterback Ryan Mallett, who by the way was 6’7 probably 250, drowned due to a rip tide in Florida. Very sad day for us in Arkansas. But goes to show that it doesn’t matter how big, how strong or how athletic you are. The ocean will always win. RIP Ryan Mallett
Well football and swimming are totally different skills. Athleticism (strength and agility) doesn't equate skill. It does still all stem from the hubris of man.
@@hourglas that’s not the point. I’m just pointing out the the ocean is a powerful force. That is it. Don’t extract some sinister meaning out of everything
Remedial, basic and nothing special about him, not sure how he’s famous or a comedian. Completely lost on me and I actually know some decent name comedians one as big as him. Sorry, Theo doesn’t get hate from me but no love either tho, his act baffles me, is AMerica that dumb they’re that easily entertained?!?
I think it goes beyond panic- like, immediately to accepting your fate. When my father taught me to surf, we had a shark "encounter". He told me to just paddle back- I was upset and angry that he didn't "attempt" to save me. When we got back to the beach he said "If that shark wanted you, there was nothing I could do anyway." He was right then, and he's right now! 🤣
Me and some buddies paddled out of Sandy’s beach on Oahu in 40 foot storm swells. No boards, no fins. That’s a notorious beach breaking wave area and when these waves would break, they were so powerful, they sent a wave back the other direction. We were the only 3 people in the water. Everyone else was in the parking area watching us. I know it was stupid, but floating up the face of the waves was so big and fast, it took your breath away.
OmG, you idiot, Sandy’s is thumping. I’m a world travelling surfer and a small day at Waimea just taking a sunset swim to cool off almost turned deadly, not to say I’m never scared but not many places in the world make me legit concerned and I truly almost couldn’t get back in to shore. I legit had that convo with myself in my head and had a mini panic. Fack! 15-20mins later some late teen early 20s young ‘local’ actually Hawaiian kids literally had to be saved and one had a boogie even! I had a good laugh with them cause they’re local! 🫣🤣👀
My mom and i got caught in a riptide in Mexico. We were both crazy athletic and by the time we got back, we were just crying and so fucking exhausted. Shit was terrifying. She just told me to go and not try and help her. 😩
Nah bro I understand the panic. U done exactly what not to do by exhausting yourself instead of letting the ride tide take you and if u need once your free you call for the lifeguard. As im writing this he talks about it 😂😂😂
@@rachelroberts633 I almost drowned in Spain with my dad because I didn't listen to him. Was maybe 12 at most 120lbs. My dad tells me if I want to go to the inside of the waterfall I need to swim under the crashing water to avoid the wall of water. But instead I tried to muscle myself through swimming and my head instantly got taken underneath and whereever your head goes the body follows along. This send me into my first ever 70% panic under the water thinking I might drown because I dont know what way is up to swim but I quickly took action and flailed into the right position to swim for air too me it felt like the best breath of air in my life. Turn out I never made it through the waterfall and popped right back out where I started. But my sister listened to my dad and was already inside with his help so I quickly tried again and made it in. Unforgettable moments in life like that make me grateful for life. My dad probs pretended to not see it to test my grit🤣
@@DwarfDt pretty sure if they made the wrong call they would be dead lol every situation is different. The ocean doesn’t just have a schedule for when it’ll let you swim back on shore before getting drifted out another 50- 100 feet
I can remember when my grandfather took me on a 2 day deep sea fishing trip way out in the Gulf of Mexico ( about 45 miles out ) off the coast of Alabama….and it was fun and we caught loads of fish …but over time I began to feel disoriented…if your a landlubber you’ll soon realize that you’ll have a hard time knowing what direction your looking at…nothing but a flat navy blue wet desert ( basically that’s what the ocean is )…..and who knows what monsters are swimming around below the surface! It made me appreciate landmarks and…I felt like kissing the ground when we got back to port ! 😂 The amazing fish fillets that we took home was well with it ! 😋🐟 I also became fascinated with pirates…I always wonder what it was like to see a ship with a 🏴☠️ and coming closer and closer to your merchant ship..a terrifying thought imo. Also fascinated with the Polynesian navigators who used small boats to cross vast expanses of the Pacific..like that’s incredible and brave if you think about it ! 🗿
What has this world come to. While watching a video of a man getting literally eaten alive by sharks we have people laughing their asses off and cracking jokes. Wild man.
He even explained that you're not supposed to just swim straight back and then proceeded to describe doing exactly that. The whole point of swimming along the shore instead of back to shore is so that you're not fighting the current while you get out of it.
Just last month I was snorkeling in Costa Rica off of the Playas de Coco and got caught in a rip current and that was pretty jarring. I was trying to swim back and was going literally as hard as I physically could, trying to swim as fast as I could, and I looked down at the sand to see I wasn’t even moving at all. It was terrifying, humbling, and exhausting.
The video that surfaced earlier this year from Australia when the guy got bit in half by a great white shark was actually a location where a friend of mine had sent me videos! My buddy in Australia walks on that Golf Course property and has sent me videos from that same area! I could not imagine swimming even though we shouldn't let alone swimming in that part of the ocean
That Australian shark attack video was insane, the most jarring one I'd ever seen. What an absolute horrible way to die. I will not dip a toe in the ocean.
@@melancholyeel right! Ocean=HELL NO for me haha I told Kane Hodder (Jason Voorhees) that Jason keeps me out of lakes and Jaws keeps me out of the ocean... he said I was a pųsssssssy and we both had a hell of a good laugh cause I am man enough to admit I am freaking terrified of SHARKS 🦈
@@Humongous420 you met Kane Hodder? Lucky sob. There is literally nothing more terrifying than floating in an abyss surrounded by things that will actually eat you or at least try to take a chomp out of you (don't get me started on 🐊). Makes me shiver.
my first time in the ocean i was in Fla, I was 5y/o.. I was in water up to my waist and a wave came over my head and slammed me to the bottom... then it draged me along the bottom, into a rip current. When I popped up I was about 70 ft off shore and being pulled out to sea. I was rescued by boat. That's my first time in the Ocean stroy.
I lived on the coast in Humbolt County Ca for ten years In that time I met no less then 5 guys that had been bit by great whites I guess about a hundred yards off the coast is littered with juvenile Great Whites
My friend and I were swimming in the ocean by Cape Town, didn't pay attention for 2 min an got dragged out about 900m. Its scary to see people get small on the beach
Great to see everyone so negative about Bert!! 👍🏻 Let’s collectively trash a man when we know nothing about what’s going on in his life. Love the positivity about Toms friend. Keep it up people. Our lives will feel much better putting each other down. Being sarcastic btw. We are one. Always lift up. Never tear down.
I went on a deep sea snorkeling excursion in the islands of the Bahamas. We jumped off the boat in the middle of the ocean swimming with manta rays, dolphins, and other fish.. Looking back at it I’m just thinking to myself I put myself at risk of a potential shark attack lol 😅
I forget where exactly but I think it was either Bon Aire or Turks and Caicos, probably Bon Aire..... 5 hours later.... there is a water park with a walking path filled with inches to feet of water. You go in swim wear as you walk through there is different aquatic life with the end being a huge (well huge for what it is) pool with about half meter or 18" or foot and half deep with stingrays and non threatening little sharks and a jellys but you can't get to close to the jellys. One of my girlfriends said she played with an octopus while we were there but I didn't not see it and cant confirm. It was awesome and I sincerely hope you have the opportunity to enjoy it or something similar. Say yes (use common sense but) say yes to new experiences whenever possible. The world is amazing enjoy your short as often as possible. Yes Im filled to the gills with ....
Got knocked by a random large wave in Mexico, when I came up from the surface I was 30 feet farther out and in a riptide. Barely survives, yes the ocean is humbling
Maybe it was just the way he explained it but I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to let a rip tide "just take you" and then immediately swim directly back to shore. Once you're in it you should pretty soon afterwards be swimming parallel to the shore to escape the current and then swim back, not find a spot where your feet touch so you can run thru it back to the beach lol
Lmfao this is hilarious as a Mexican from Hawaii i was taught at a young age to respect the ocean and I'm glad I don't feel like a wimp anymore for not wanting to snorkel or go past my stomach into the ocean lol I'm always grounded and dragging my feet when I go in. And I don't go in if it's not clear.
Damn bruh Im Mexican and visiting Hawaii and it trips me out how ppl were able to travel the ocean back in the day from the mainland to even Europe ppl don’t notice how good most ppl have it not traveling in the ocean but man Hawaii is whole different vibe out here lol
I had a personal beach spot at an air bnb on Oahu and tried to surf solo and I almost drowned in like 15 minutes. Got pulled out and flipped underwater like a goddamn washing machine. Walked back up to my family afterwards and was like “I almost fucking died” which made it feel even crazier
Good idea to listen to a guy afraid of even going in the water. It's beautiful and worth the experience swimming in the water. I always have an ankle knife with me just in case. :)
“I dont vacation anywhere the bible happened” lol
I cracked up so hard on that one!
theo is something else dude
Freaking genius.
Excellent idea.
@@melancholyeel calm down
I was Navy from 17 to 25 during OEF after 9/11. I lived in the ocean, the real middle of nowhere, for 159 days during the war. If you want to see terrifying and awe struck at the same time, witness a storm in the north Atlantic with waves at 60 ft tall and lightning streaming all around you while you rush to carry chains and tie down the birds on deck. The wind goes in every direction at once sometimes and it freezes you in place, or at least that's what it felt like. I have also seen the ocean so calm it was like a mirror, and you could not tell the sky from the ocean without looking at the wake. It was the most amazing experience of my life and I am dam proud to be a US Sailor. A man should be so lucky.
Thank you for serving our country, brother
My Dad was in the Navy in the late 80s / early 90s and tells similar stories. He says they’d be in a huge storm looking at waves bigger and taller than you could imagine and the only thing scarier is knowing the same thing is happening when it’s pitch black. You’re just along for the ride.
So many people didn't read this comment cause it's too much reading for them 😆
❤️🫡
Thank you for your service
The best advice I ever got in Hawaii was “if the locals aren’t in the water, you don’t go in the water”.
Someone's paying attention. As someone who is born X raised from hawai'i thats 1 of 2 things we try to tell them and also if the rocks are wet don't stand there. I rescued my fair share of tourists who don't listen to us locals 🤦🏾♂️
@ufa621 wow good for you
And don't go surfing/paddling of you can't swim
I think that's the best advice you can an could give anyone
lmao shit 3 ft deep is good enough for me I’m real fucking close to land I’m about to just stand up when I see something
Without Bert this pods actually enjoyable
a hundred percent
Amen
I legit thought I was the only one who didn't like him. His "laugh" is the most annoying thing I've ever heard and he's not funny at all
You’re not the only loser with an opinion that doesn’t matter don’t worry @@handypropertymaintenancelt1692
They’re both incredibly corny. Just here for Theo.
Knew a guy that drowned our freshman year of college. Went to high school with him. He was a star athlete. One of the most athletic guys I’ve ever seen. Grew up swimming. He drowned one day in a lake. That taught me a valuable lesson. No one is too good to drown. Always respect the water.
Sounds like another AI comment
Yea but you left out the fact that he was 87 at the time, had arthritis in his pelvis and was 67 years past his prime.
The water is a cruel mistress
Just drowned? Walked in the the lake and never came up? There has to be more to that story.
Huh? Sounds like you drowned them because that just doesn’t make any sense
I want to like Bert so much but you can’t deny it’s so much better when he’s not around
Right now Bert is spiraling and needs to drop the alcohol and sober up.
I think he is likeable he is just not funny. I have tried watching his stuff and just cannot bring myself to keep viewing for more than a minute or two.
Why would you want that
@@JamesExcell-InterJexspiraling how?😂😂😂
Bert os is fine yall bots, yall forgetting the kool aid bit?
These are the best episodes, the ones without Bert.
New show: 1 bear 1 cave 1 guest
Bert's lack of self-awareness has caused him to be unable to realize most of us are pretty much done trying to tolerate him on this podcast.
@@WhiteCheddar.more like 1 otter, toms getting skinny
The ocean doesn’t want to kill you, but it is completely indifferent to your survival.
Neither is the land.
0:36 "There's worse than that??" LMAO Theo can be so sweet and innocent sometimes 🤣
Yeah. When he's not doing drugs.
He licked his lips immediately after saying that lmao
I freakin love Theo.He’s got such a kind soul,
@@justkidding8304 We all have Light and Dark within us.There both two sides of one coin..Both are needed to progress a Souls evolution forward..
You stay sweet and lovely, and don’t you even peak at the dark arts! 😂
When you’re caught in a rip tide never swim against it. Swim left or right of it. Keep in mind some of rip currents can be wide. So don’t panic if it takes out a little bit. The most important thing is to conserve as much energy as you can while swimming laterally.
I’d love to see a podcast of Danny McBride and Theo Von he should have him on this past weekend
The Draven himself
Theo needs to be on Righteous Gem Stone
Theos only getting better... hes becoming a great.
The ocean's so heartless. It's so heartless, man. It's like wet time."
Big fans of both of you. I'm a Colorado Native. Mountains dont scare me. I've been trained to survive in the Mountains. But Iam TERRIFIED of the ocean. What happened to Segura happened to me almost to a 'T" i was in Daytona ( strong swimmer since I was a kid ) And in a split second I was swept out to sea. Like 50 yards off the Coast absolutely terrified! I saw life guards jumping off their chairs just as remembered ( just like Segura said ) just basically go limp and let the tide take you in... Sorry, for the long-winded post.
Being in the ocean is so comforting, but I agree going snorkeling, when the sand becomes a black hole, can be pretty terrifying
Even reading that gave me goosebumps
Theo calling the ocean “wet time” has got to be the most creative yet accurate description of the ocean i’ve ever heard
Lol rip tide
It’s weird to heard them talk about a serious situation while everyone in the background is belly laughing lol
Tom lookin more and more like Hard Rock Nick every day
I don’t even try to miss Bert anymore. Any clip without him is automatically better
Tom is for sure the star of the two bears show.
That's because Bert isn't very funny.
@luandong3044 he's not funny at all what are you talking about
@@Jroc90903sometimes watching him embarrass himself gets a couple good chuckles out of me
If a shark ever gets a hold of you and pulls you under water, try to reason with it and call the police immediately. This is why you should always have a waterproof phone.
I can’t stop laughing at this. 😅😅😅😅
Two of my favorite comics. Simply the best ❤
Tom and theo leave space for the jokes. Great podcast.
Nothing scarier than being in the ocean and realizing there are no fish around, *I'm FUCKED*, IS A REAL FEAR REACTION that came to mind as he spoke it. What an amazing comedian without even trying to be funny he still kills you. No pun intended.
Love you Guys for being sooooo Real😊😊😊
An uncle once wrestled a 7' Bull Shark that had bit his nephews arm off. Dragged it to the shore where a ranger shot it in the head. The uncle cut the 🦈 open to get his nephews arm. Was able to retrieve it and get it to the hospital in time to be reattached. Oh it happened in Florida
Wow! What a story. Is your cousin still in possession of his arm?
@@markadler8968 They are of no relation to me. Just a crazy beach story.
I've wrestled a 30 inch jumbo Koi fish from off of my foot while wearing a pair of Stacey Adams dress shoe when I tripped and fell into a Koi pond at a Japanese restaurant. It was horrific!
Theo? This you?
@@disguiseddv8ant486did you take a little bite of that tasty catfish?
i’ve lived in fl my entire life & i always tell people to check the current before they swim. if you’re here, they send out rip current warnings so i’m not sure why people aren’t getting the warnings or taking them seriously
Theo speaking this softly at the start.. he needs to narrate movies or meditation. So relaxing 🩵🙌🏻✨
The lady that lost her leg by the great white that was swimming off the cruise ship. Crazy watching it come up from the blue to grab her and people screaming. like a movie.
I went swimming in a bay in Hawai'i once and my foot hit something real solid under the water. I got out of that water REAL fast.
Tom and Theo: "On Maui the ocean is the biggest danger"
Meanwhile, Maui: [burning the f down]
People escaping INTO the ocean to get away from the fire
Yeah I suppose being caught in a one on a million fire might be a little more dangerous.
To get out of a riptide you're meant to swim parallel to the shore until you escape the zone that's pulling you out. Not just let it take you out 😅
Just seeing this footage alone upsets me genuinely. Does anyone else have that? I mean i feel like wtf do you even want to watch that or have a show about it because its not worth it type of upset.
It should upset you. It means you aren't a psychopath. But you should also watch things like this anyway so that you don't have any illusions about what the world is like and how quickly life can end. That dude likely thought he was going to go home, eat dinner, have sex, wake up tomorrow, answer some emails, send some videos to his friends. Nope. Fish turds. He became fish turds. And really that's the ultimate question in life and death: What kind of turds will you end up being?
I was caught in a riptide in California a couple years back. Was terrified when all of a sudden all the sand beneath my feet was gone and I quickly remembered you need to go around it basically and swim back. And I'm a strong swimmer who grew up swimming in Colorado rapids. Thankfully did not experience it while in the méditerranéen..
Having grown up on the Pacific Ocean it was impressed upon us that our playground is the single most dangerous "living organism" extent.
One of the strangest sensations is losing sight of land. Especially on a small craft. You become cellular, insignificant.
The greatest attraction of surfing is that cooperative dance in/on this incredible destructive force that almost killed me a half dozen times...
Is English a second language for you or do you just insist on speaking poetically despite being really bad at it?
Speak plainly, like a normal person. Save the flowery prose for your blog
The ocean is terrifying. Not sure why people swim in it. Not a fan of lakes either. Just deep deep deep murky water that you cant see what's in there and is slimy and pokey and scrapey all at the same time while having giant beasts in there that can swim very fast and are very powerful. No thanks. Beautiful to stand on shore and look at though.
While commercially fishing salmon in Alaska we thought we had a big group of fish,It was instead a seven foot shark!My boss was on top of the motor screaming at me to get it out of the boat!
As an Australian I was always taught to swim parallel to the beach when caught in a rip. Then when you're out of it swim back in, don't try to go back in the same way.
Yeah it seems we got and still give the best education when it comes to the beach.
Makes sense though, nearly all of us live on the coast.
I thought as an Australian they would’ve taught you to avoid the water altogether lol. Scary out there
@@nigelthornberry9484 nah mate, the worst I've ever come across are blue bottles and the occasional stingray. Safe as
Here’s the thing, you do live near it, you were taught some basics, and your type is also never the ones drowning. It’s the people visiting that don’t live near and never had one word of advice needed taught to them because they are from waaayyy inland. Duh, simple concept tho huh? 😉🫣😂
Philosopher Theo on the ocean: "It's like wet time"
NOTHING!!! more humbling than the ocean! and it's my Love.
#roatan
#thalassophile
#dontbeadumbass
i got a Hammerhead story you wouldn't believe.
Just a few weeks ago, one of the best and most popular athletes that the University of Arkansas has ever had, quarterback Ryan Mallett, who by the way was 6’7 probably 250, drowned due to a rip tide in Florida. Very sad day for us in Arkansas. But goes to show that it doesn’t matter how big, how strong or how athletic you are. The ocean will always win. RIP Ryan Mallett
Well football and swimming are totally different skills. Athleticism (strength and agility) doesn't equate skill.
It does still all stem from the hubris of man.
Being big or having more muscle is actually not that great for swimming, more muscle on you, the more oxygen your body needs.
@@JoseGonz0908 Nope. You can produce more force against a riptide which would give you a better chance of getting out.
The oceN does not always win you disrespectful fool.
@@hourglas that’s not the point. I’m just pointing out the the ocean is a powerful force. That is it. Don’t extract some sinister meaning out of everything
Theo is almost kid-like at times ...I think hes one of the coolest people of our age !
Remedial, basic and nothing special about him, not sure how he’s famous or a comedian. Completely lost on me and I actually know some decent name comedians one as big as him. Sorry, Theo doesn’t get hate from me but no love either tho, his act baffles me, is AMerica that dumb they’re that easily entertained?!?
Theo-- Water is like wet time. Nice one.
I think it goes beyond panic- like, immediately to accepting your fate. When my father taught me to surf, we had a shark "encounter". He told me to just paddle back- I was upset and angry that he didn't "attempt" to save me. When we got back to the beach he said "If that shark wanted you, there was nothing I could do anyway." He was right then, and he's right now! 🤣
Me and some buddies paddled out of Sandy’s beach on Oahu in 40 foot storm swells. No boards, no fins. That’s a notorious beach breaking wave area and when these waves would break, they were so powerful, they sent a wave back the other direction. We were the only 3 people in the water. Everyone else was in the parking area watching us. I know it was stupid, but floating up the face of the waves was so big and fast, it took your breath away.
OmG, you idiot, Sandy’s is thumping. I’m a world travelling surfer and a small day at Waimea just taking a sunset swim to cool off almost turned deadly, not to say I’m never scared but not many places in the world make me legit concerned and I truly almost couldn’t get back in to shore. I legit had that convo with myself in my head and had a mini panic. Fack! 15-20mins later some late teen early 20s young ‘local’ actually Hawaiian kids literally had to be saved and one had a boogie even! I had a good laugh with them cause they’re local! 🫣🤣👀
“I guess you’d want to record since it’s your last time seeing him.” Theo is a mess. 😂
My mom and i got caught in a riptide in Mexico. We were both crazy athletic and by the time we got back, we were just crying and so fucking exhausted. Shit was terrifying. She just told me to go and not try and help her. 😩
Nah bro I understand the panic. U done exactly what not to do by exhausting yourself instead of letting the ride tide take you and if u need once your free you call for the lifeguard. As im writing this he talks about it 😂😂😂
@@DwarfDt we were on a secluded beach. We've always been thrill seekers from the snow to the sea. That was a wake up call.
@@rachelroberts633 I almost drowned in Spain with my dad because I didn't listen to him. Was maybe 12 at most 120lbs. My dad tells me if I want to go to the inside of the waterfall I need to swim under the crashing water to avoid the wall of water. But instead I tried to muscle myself through swimming and my head instantly got taken underneath and whereever your head goes the body follows along. This send me into my first ever 70% panic under the water thinking I might drown because I dont know what way is up to swim but I quickly took action and flailed into the right position to swim for air too me it felt like the best breath of air in my life. Turn out I never made it through the waterfall and popped right back out where I started. But my sister listened to my dad and was already inside with his help so I quickly tried again and made it in. Unforgettable moments in life like that make me grateful for life. My dad probs pretended to not see it to test my grit🤣
@@DwarfDt pretty sure if they made the wrong call they would be dead lol every situation is different. The ocean doesn’t just have a schedule for when it’ll let you swim back on shore before getting drifted out another 50- 100 feet
Both Tom and Theo have brilliant moments. Theo has idiot savant moments... like Peter Sellers in Being There. Like Charlie Chaplin at times.
Yo when Theo said the Ocean is cruel and it's "like wet time" it blew my fucking mind hahaha
Remake "Being There" with Theo Von in the Chance the Gardener role. I'd watch that!
✡️
I can remember when my grandfather took me on a 2 day deep sea fishing trip way out in the Gulf of Mexico ( about 45 miles out ) off the coast of Alabama….and it was fun and we caught loads of fish …but over time I began to feel disoriented…if your a landlubber you’ll soon realize that you’ll have a hard time knowing what direction your looking at…nothing but a flat navy blue wet desert ( basically that’s what the ocean is )…..and who knows what monsters are swimming around below the surface!
It made me appreciate landmarks and…I felt like kissing the ground when we got back to port ! 😂
The amazing fish fillets that we took home was well with it ! 😋🐟
I also became fascinated with pirates…I always wonder what it was like to see a ship with a 🏴☠️ and coming closer and closer to your merchant ship..a terrifying thought imo. Also fascinated with the Polynesian navigators who used small boats to cross vast expanses of the Pacific..like that’s incredible and brave if you think about it ! 🗿
‘And the father kept recording’ 😂ffs
The guy in the background laughing got me! 😂 😂😂LMFAO
That " I don't travel anywhere the Bible happened" fuckin killed me 😂😂🤣🤣🤣👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
What has this world come to. While watching a video of a man getting literally eaten alive by sharks we have people laughing their asses off and cracking jokes. Wild man.
Thats always how the world has been. Thats how we deal with sad shit. So we dont get depressed all the time.
If anyone listens to Tom on how to deal with the rip current, you will die.
He even explained that you're not supposed to just swim straight back and then proceeded to describe doing exactly that. The whole point of swimming along the shore instead of back to shore is so that you're not fighting the current while you get out of it.
Just last month I was snorkeling in Costa Rica off of the Playas de Coco and got caught in a rip current and that was pretty jarring. I was trying to swim back and was going literally as hard as I physically could, trying to swim as fast as I could, and I looked down at the sand to see I wasn’t even moving at all. It was terrifying, humbling, and exhausting.
The laughing in the back ground 😂
The video that surfaced earlier this year from Australia when the guy got bit in half by a great white shark was actually a location where a friend of mine had sent me videos! My buddy in Australia walks on that Golf Course property and has sent me videos from that same area! I could not imagine swimming even though we shouldn't let alone swimming in that part of the ocean
That Australian shark attack video was insane, the most jarring one I'd ever seen. What an absolute horrible way to die. I will not dip a toe in the ocean.
@@melancholyeel right! Ocean=HELL NO for me haha I told Kane Hodder (Jason Voorhees) that Jason keeps me out of lakes and Jaws keeps me out of the ocean... he said I was a pųsssssssy and we both had a hell of a good laugh cause I am man enough to admit I am freaking terrified of SHARKS 🦈
@@Humongous420 you met Kane Hodder? Lucky sob. There is literally nothing more terrifying than floating in an abyss surrounded by things that will actually eat you or at least try to take a chomp out of you (don't get me started on 🐊). Makes me shiver.
Theo Von knowns reactions are the best.
First Theo sentence and I’m dying laughing
my first time in the ocean i was in Fla, I was 5y/o.. I was in water up to my waist and a wave came over my head and slammed me to the bottom... then it draged me along the bottom, into a rip current. When I popped up I was about 70 ft off shore and being pulled out to sea. I was rescued by boat. That's my first time in the Ocean stroy.
"You're the lifeguard!"
"No....."
How depressing..
Watching this, I thought "something's weird, doesn't feel right", penny drops..."oh, Tom's saying words, and sentences"!!
Theo looks like an NPC with them specs lmao
Tom projectile laughing the word “Think” has me rolling 😂😂
Theo is amazing!
My favorite part was the laughing coming from outside the studio lmaoo
Bob Marley really analyzing that footage with genuine interest. 😂
Theo was in Hawaii getting some of that Khalayla Tuna Fish Patty
Why did the stoner lifeguard not save the guy in the ocean? He was too far out, man!
Theo reminds me of Brain from Family Guy when he wore the glasses for attention 😂😂😂
I Don't Mean to Impose but I Am the Ocean- The Tony Danza Tapdance Extravaganza
5 years ago and we don’t get Tom’s new fire Netflix specials.
Oh my goodness, I'm so I'm love with Theo Von! ❤
"I don't vacation anywhere where the Bible happened" 🤣🤣🤣
I feel like more people should've laughed at that statement lol
I lived on the coast in Humbolt County Ca for ten years In that time I met no less then 5 guys that had been bit by great whites I guess about a hundred yards off the coast is littered with juvenile Great Whites
Juveniles are the ones to worry about
“I don’t vacation anywhere the Bible happened” omfg 😂
My friend and I were swimming in the ocean by Cape Town, didn't pay attention for 2 min an got dragged out about 900m. Its scary to see people get small on the beach
Great to see everyone so negative about Bert!! 👍🏻 Let’s collectively trash a man when we know nothing about what’s going on in his life. Love the positivity about Toms friend. Keep it up people. Our lives will feel much better putting each other down. Being sarcastic btw. We are one. Always lift up. Never tear down.
I don’t watch a lot of that, but I will look at it😂😂😂😂
I went on a deep sea snorkeling excursion in the islands of the Bahamas. We jumped off the boat in the middle of the ocean swimming with manta rays, dolphins, and other fish.. Looking back at it I’m just thinking to myself I put myself at risk of a potential shark attack lol 😅
I forget where exactly but I think it was either Bon Aire or Turks and Caicos, probably Bon Aire..... 5 hours later.... there is a water park with a walking path filled with inches to feet of water. You go in swim wear as you walk through there is different aquatic life with the end being a huge (well huge for what it is) pool with about half meter or 18" or foot and half deep with stingrays and non threatening little sharks and a jellys but you can't get to close to the jellys. One of my girlfriends said she played with an octopus while we were there but I didn't not see it and cant confirm. It was awesome and I sincerely hope you have the opportunity to enjoy it or something similar. Say yes (use common sense but) say yes to new experiences whenever possible. The world is amazing enjoy your short as often as possible.
Yes Im filled to the gills with ....
Not if there were dolphins around. Sharks are spooked by dolphins.
Can you imagine theo doing the brent laugh? Holding his hand out to stop everyone from talking ehile he weezes
Got knocked by a random large wave in Mexico, when I came up from the surface I was 30 feet farther out and in a riptide. Barely survives, yes the ocean is humbling
These are good stories.
SWIM DIAGONALLY please people the rip will ALWAYS win
"Wet time" is underrated
Maybe it was just the way he explained it but I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to let a rip tide "just take you" and then immediately swim directly back to shore. Once you're in it you should pretty soon afterwards be swimming parallel to the shore to escape the current and then swim back, not find a spot where your feet touch so you can run thru it back to the beach lol
Crescent City, Cali. Wicked wicked r.i.p. currents.
Aw… Theo was so innocent and soft spoken ❤
:3 rawr
I’m a 40 year soldier of surfing in Hawaii. This is the wildest attack on line. I saw this the day it came out. It’s beautiful
“1/30 of the urban kids” 😂🤣🤣 Jesus Christ Theo
If the locals don't swim there, don't go
If anyone gets caught in a riptide. Let it take you, then swim parallel to the shore.
Lmfao this is hilarious as a Mexican from Hawaii i was taught at a young age to respect the ocean and I'm glad I don't feel like a wimp anymore for not wanting to snorkel or go past my stomach into the ocean lol I'm always grounded and dragging my feet when I go in. And I don't go in if it's not clear.
Damn bruh Im Mexican and visiting Hawaii and it trips me out how ppl were able to travel the ocean back in the day from the mainland to even Europe ppl don’t notice how good most ppl have it not traveling in the ocean but man Hawaii is whole different vibe out here lol
Why is everyone hating on Bert? He is hilarious!!
Protect Theo at all costs.
He is The. Best. 🤣
I had a personal beach spot at an air bnb on Oahu and tried to surf solo and I almost drowned in like 15 minutes. Got pulled out and flipped underwater like a goddamn washing machine. Walked back up to my family afterwards and was like “I almost fucking died” which made it feel even crazier
Good idea to listen to a guy afraid of even going in the water. It's beautiful and worth the experience swimming in the water. I always have an ankle knife with me just in case. :)
wet time....theo sometimes you are so poetic