oh man where to begin….one time i had lost my favorite rubber ducky 😢, and then my mom tried to give me another one but she just couldn’t understand the importance of the first one…
Childhood sexual abuse, a violent rape at 12, a narcissistic husband who abandoned me homeless, a mother who gave everything to the son nothing to the daughters. I was ignored, laughed at, called names, had to grow myself into a person that one died.
When someone has an emotional breakdown in front of me it always makes me so uncomfortable because as a child I was always told that it was not appropriate to express your emotions in front of people. I usually just don't know how to respond or how to comfort them and end up feeling extremely guilty.
Thank you for sharing something so personal with us. Despite feeling uncomfortable, it sounds to me like you deeply care about the people who express themselves to you. I think being honest about how you feel with the people who share can be very helpful for you. Letting them know that you don't exactly know how to respond when people share their feelings but still telling them that you're listening will help people feel that even though you don't know how to exactly help, you're willing to lend an ear. I hope that this will give you a good start.
ik how u feel, people complaining, whining or being rlly sad or happy just makes me so uncomfortable, it just feels like weird gooey feeling and i hate it. i would get laughed at or judged by my parents for openly expressing such emotions, now see other people do it is so foreign to me.
Me too Everytime I look at the road i nearly cry (I don't cuz I'm a maaaan-😂) no I nearly cry cuz i see the good not nice friend that i had that not threatens me everytime I see them and it's pretty not good cuz he's MY NEIGHBOR. NEIGHBOR but ye i hope your ok and ye good day to yall
I remember my dad coming home drunk fighting with everyone at home and throwing me around or even that year when he was drunk again and when I tried to distract myself, he grabbed my hair and pulled me from the bedroom into the living room.
0:35 - 1. Sensations 1:10 - 2. Being with people who are emotional 1:45 - 3. Reactions to certain places and people 2:27 - 4. Avoiding help, even when you need it 3:08 - 5. Avoiding conflict at all costs 4:04 - 6. The media you consume 5:06 - 7. Time & anniversaries
One trauma that took me several years to get over was when my dad beat me 47 times in a row with a belt. I couldn't be around guys or even be touched by them without having an anxiety attack. It's been 5 years though and while the reaction is not as bad I'm still uncomfortable around middle aged guys (cause my dad is middle-aged so I guess it's like a trigger). Edit: some added info. He got arrested for it and my grandma had to bail him out. So I lived with my grandma for a year and a half for my 8th grade year and some of the summer.
@@Psych2go I would say it's more specific. The author deconstructs behaviour patterns and relate them to what she considers to be the 5 (curiously) main childhood wound types. It is a great read. So is your work 🙏♥️
The fire in my childhood house when I was 13, my aunt dying in 2004, my dad incarcerated, my mother dying in front of me in 2009. Not having many friends growing up and going to many schools in Baltimore, Maryland. These are the sources of my trauma.
My Mother is also a Capricorn person ♑🐐 too & plus I haven't got a chance to get on with her at all. Just literally because she has been very harsh towards me & even as well by being so judgemental/manipulative towards me due, with my "high" functioning mild autism that I was actually born with in real life too indeed. But the very saddest truth is that I don't love my mom at all just literally because she does tend to provokes me, or by criticizing, & even as well by actually trying to belittle all of my dreams in a very negative & a very unhealthy ways too sweetie. Like also in fact that I wasn't not actually allowed to make messes & even by making all of those types small mistakes too as well indeed. And so that also explains why that I haven't been able to reach out my mom on the phone just literally because she has over crossed the line with me for the final of the 14 strikes in total that she has really pulled on me of this first & final time like in real life too sweetie. Like ever since when I was an 8 year old little girl like in fact about the whole incident that has happened to me like ever since when it was on October 31st which in the year of 2008 just quite literally just until like in the the month of September which was actually on the 22nd like in the year of 2022 too as well sweetie. Like did also involves by invading my personal space, & even as well by taking away all of my personal belongings that I had specifically brought with my very hard-working money too by placing in the trash without my permission repeatedly. My mom does not tend to do those types of wicked stuff like towards my two siblings which are her two other grown-up children's of course just like that she would always do that to me like pretty much too indeed . And plus I was also born as a Leo♌🦁 person too but at the exact same time that I could also be a Libra ♎⚖️ person too indeed. Like in fact that I am also a very loving, kind, caring, gentle & a very passionate human being that does not deserve to be treated that way like in fact that it is also not my obligated to sit there just to literally take that all of those types of toxic abuse/behaviors from my mother just literally because I am also just a very highly sensitive person too sweetie. And plus I am also going to be getting myself a new job & so this way that I could move out from the toxic environment away from my mother too immediately. Just literally because every child at any age does not deserve to be treated that way like in fact that she could of also approached to me like in a different type of response like that involves by helping me with organizing my bedroom properly but in a very positive ways with a lot of praises & even with a lot of encouragements like pretty much like towards too as well. But instead of actually by doing a lot of negative things towards me like that involves by yelling directly 😤😠😡😞😭😢💔 💔💔💔at me right in front of my very beautiful lovely gorgeous face & even as well by taking all of my personal belongings that I have specifically brought with my very hard-working money once again by placing them in the trash without my permission repeatedly. And plus I am also the middle born child out of my two siblings with is my older brother who is actually two years apart from me & I even do have a sister who is actually five years younger than me too also in adulthood too indeed. I am also very extremely proud of myself for staying strong 💪🏽 & very most beautiful lovely wise upbringing, mature young girl/lady for all those types of pains that I ever had to go through like pretty much my whole entire life for over the past 15 years now. Like in fact that I am also technically 23 which means that I my birthday is actually coming up pretty soon like on the 9th of August which is actually going to be this current year of 2023 just quite literally because that I was actually born in the year of 2000 too in real life too as well indeed. And plus I did found this video very interesting for me to watch today. Thank you so much for sharing this very Excellent comment to my very sweet loving kind friend. sending you a lot of prayers 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽 & a very big nice warm hug from your very sweet loving kind sister friend Chaleika. 🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸
@@Cat.12345. well thank you much very for your very kind words & your support from you my very sweet loving kind friend & I really do appreciate that from you too as well indeed. And plus I really do need a hug right now 😭😢💔 to get all of things from off my system right at now at this breaking point just quite literally because my very disgraceful mother has been treating me very terribly for over the past like 15 years now. Like in fact that I really do need to get a job that does require a full payment job for a person with special needs which also means that I was actually born with mild autism too in real life too sweetie.
#7 hits me hard. As a child I was wrongly put in the ER and mental hospitals by my mother. Those terrible places gave me PTSD. I was in a mental hospital on my birthday 4 years ago and because of that I hate my birthday. My birthday was a few days ago and I’ve been more irritable and on edge than usual. I felt anger for the people who wronged me.
Are you me? Cuz as a kid I wasn't the most well behaved, had tantrums like any other kid... But somehow that got interpreted as me being developmentally disabled, ADHD, autistic, something not mentally well. I was put on meds at 5 for tantrums & never got out of the mental health arena till just a year ago when a group home that my high school I lived in set up for me forced me out with their absolutely untenable rules. Emotional neglect, wrongful treatment, birthdays ruined for a long, long time? Yeah... That's me too... I feel you m8, I feel you...
@@neetard7360 same, I have ADHD and autism and 22 other disorders but people, including my family and classmates, always said that it was behavioral issues and that it was just “my personality” I only have 2 friends but they are both loyal and understand me since they also have disorders. Not as much as me though 😅
@@neetard7360 omg. i’ve been put on meds since I was 6. Around that time i was diagnosed with ADHD but didn’t find out until a few years later. my anger issues were bad staring at 8 years old. the thing is i would only get violent at my mom’s house and school, never with my dad. my parents divorced when i was 3 and i was in joint custody. my mom’s house was a terrible environment. she didn’t understand me and when i was 11 the “experts” finally pulled their heads out of their butts and realized if i live with my dad full time, i wouldn’t get violent. i’m 15 now and i haven’t attacked anyone in years. even tho i no longer have anger issues, i’m left with anxiety, depression and PTSD.
@@idkanymore9894 My Mother is also a Capricorn person ♑🐐 too & plus I haven't got a chance to get on with her at all. Just literally because she has been very harsh towards me & even as well by being so judgemental/manipulative towards me due, with my "high" functioning mild autism that I was actually born with in real life too indeed. But the very saddest truth is that I don't love my mom at all just literally because she does tend to provokes me, or by criticizing, & even as well by actually trying to belittle all of my dreams in a very negative & a very unhealthy ways too sweetie. Like also in fact that I wasn't not actually allowed to make messes & even by making all of those types small mistakes too as well indeed. And so that also explains why that I haven't been able to reach out my mom on the phone just literally because she has over crossed the line with me for the final of the 14 strikes in total that has she really pulled on me like in real life too sweetie. Like ever since when I was an 8 year old little girl like in fact about the whole incident that has happened to me like ever since when it was on October 31st which in the year of 2008 just quite literally just until like in the the month of September which was actually on the 22nd like in the year of 2022 too as well sweetie. Like did also involves by invading my personal space, & even as well by taking away all of my personal belongings that I had specifically brought with my very hard-working money too by placing in the trash without my permission repeatedly. My mom does not tend to do those types of wicked stuff like towards my two siblings which are her two other grown-up children's of course just like that she would always do that to me like pretty much too indeed . And plus I was also born as a Leo♌🦁 person too but at the exact same time that I could also be a Libra ♎⚖️ person too indeed. Like in fact that I am also a very loving, kind, caring, gentle & a very passionate human being that does not deserve to be treated that way like in fact that it is also not my obligated to sit there just to literally take that all of those types of toxic abuse/behaviors from my mother just literally because I am also just a very highly sensitive person too sweetie. And plus I am also going to be getting myself a new job & so this way that I could move out from the toxic environment away from my mother too immediately. Just literally because every child at any age does not deserve to be treated that way like in fact that she could of also approached to me like in a different type of response like that involves by helping me with organizing my bedroom properly but in a very positive ways with a lot of praises & even with a lot of encouragements like pretty much like towards too as well. But instead of actually by doing a lot of negative things towards me like that involves by yelling directly 😤😠😡😞😭😢💔 💔💔💔at me right in front of my very beautiful lovely gorgeous face & even as well by taking all of my personal belongings that I have specifically brought with my very hard-working money once again by placing them in the trash without my permission repeatedly. And plus I am also the middle born child out of my two siblings with is my older brother who is actually two years apart from me & I even do have a sister who is actually five years younger than me too also in adulthood too as well indeed. I am also very extremely proud of myself for staying strong 💪🏽 & a very most beautiful lovely wise upbringing, mature young girl/lady for all those types of pains that I ever had to go through like pretty much my whole entire life for over the past 15 years now. Like in fact that I am also technically 23 which means that I my birthday is actually coming up pretty soon like on the 9th of August which is actually going to be this current year of 2023 just quite literally because that I was actually born in the year of 2000 too in real life too as well indeed. And plus I did found this video very interesting for me to watch today. Thank you so much for sharing this very Excellent comment to my very sweet loving kind friend. sending you a lot of prayers 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽 & a very big nice warm hug from your very sweet loving kind sister friend Chaleika. 🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸
I was around the age of a toddler. Like most toddlers, I was curious about things, like the washing machine my aunt was using to do laundry. I don't remember what happened because the next thing I know, my aunt was screaming at me. Her tone and words rattled me quite badly. To this day, I still can't stand it when people speak to me in a harsh and accusatory tone (while occasionally belittling me). If I hear that tone again, I'll instinctively shrink. It's quite common for my parents/relatives to use that unbearable tone if they are dissatisfied with something. To me, it's all about asserting dominance/control and reminding the younger ones that they've disappointed/angered/annoyed the former. In my family, parents also don't defend their kids against verbally abusive relatives. I used to feel guilty for hiding and avoiding some of my relatives because I was brought up to always greet my relatives properly regardless of how they treated me. It took a while but I've decided to ignore certain people to avoid terrifying my inner child.
I've got a trigger just from this. My father told me very harsh words about 2 years ago. Whenever someone's mean to me, being harsh, yelling, or accusing me of something my anxiety goes crazy and I start shaking like heck. It's not as bad as it was but I still shake in fear in those situations.
I hate how a lot of people are invalidated with their trauma just because you have the basic necessities of life. All these people suffering and people ignore their pleas for help just because they appear to be “fine”. Trauma is viewed as being “dramatic” to many brain dead clowns I’ve encountered. Asking for help to better yourself is “selfish” to many and it’s “weak”. If only people had love they would take the time out to learn instead of choosing if to be ignorant.
That's why my trauma keeps continuing. My dad's a "good provider" and therefore a good person and *I'm* bad for being "ungrateful" to someone who has been psychologically abusing me my entire life.
Post partem jealousy rage need to be treated and I am adopted and older simply told the brat no and I get call a horrible person and treated like I am mentally disabled since I was 3 I had grandma protecting from the worst of it until she passed away the day before my 13th birthday and after that things got worse my diploma was held back for 3 years so they could put in 2 programs for people with mental disabilities I fear being put in group home for people with mental disabilities now figuring out how to move out while unemployed and can't drive and come up with a bissness of my own so I can make money behind their backs so I can save money and get a boat license and boat to live on because it mobile and cheaper than rent and mortgage I have had things taken smashed throughout or just plain handed to the brat and hit punished because the brat would hurt itself and lie even though I was inside and I am still getting called the bully because I said no and the only thing I 99%of the time did was slap the brat in the face with any I got my hands on because boundaries and the doing not okay things
When i was younger my mom used to tell me all about her trauma and the pain that her parents gave her. I felt bad for her but it also made me think that my trauma wasnt bad enough for it to be trauma. i told myself that everything that happened to me was not truama but an unfortunate situation and i should be getting over it right now. But i couldnt just get over it. It had a hold on me and wouldn't let go. It took me a longgggg time to heal from it and realize that nobodys trauma is better than others and to stop thinking that my pain was fake bc someone had it a little harder than me.
Timestamps 1). Sensations 0:35 2). Being with people that are emotional 1:10 3). Reactions to certain places and people 1:45 4). Avoiding help even when you need it 2:27 5). Avoiding conflict at all costs 3:08 6). The media you consume 4:05 7). Time and anniversaries 5:06 Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
When we were teenagers, my friend would get uncomfortable and frustrated whenever I cried. This triggered MY old trauma because I was always chastised, even yelled at, for being too emotional as a child when I really, *really* could not help my intense feelings. I felt a deep sense of shame about my emotional responses. It's difficult for me to function in this world. I've always struggled with the feeling of inconveniencing others whenever I tear up, even though I don't have as much control over my crying as other people do. Later, I found out that my friend had childhood trauma that revolved around the adults around her using crying as a manipulation tactic. So...yeah...we all got our stuff. I'm really glad we came to understand why we are the way we are.
3:10 This part hits hella hard…this is exactly what I do. I’ve became a lot more sensitive and easy to breakdown as a result of all the trauma I’ve had. I do exactly this, especially since I’m usually a people pleasure, or if I don’t have to talk to people since I’m introverted, I just don’t talk to people and shorten conversations. *Who else has this issue?* I know it isn’t good to assume everyone is bad but…I am too scared to take chances..
@@Aven_colonthree Thanks for saying that. Even though this world is full of so many people and it's not a surprise some are similar, I've never met or heard of people having the same issue as me. Makes you feel less alone :)
This video actually helped me tell my friends, therapist, and soon my teachers and parents so people know how I feel. I really like your content as it helps me relate to my 5 disorders which are listed below. (DMDD, ADHD, Autism, Depression, Anxiety.) It really makes me happy that someone like you is telling people to be who you are and to stand up for yourself and to choose the right path. It really does help. Thank You for teaching me these topics because as a teenager myself, it truly helps me learn.
2, 4, 5, and 6 for me. These are all too relatable.. 2, I get very emotional when others are emotional. 4, I avoid asking for help.. nobody deserves to have to put up with my problems 5, I absolutely hate conflict and very often "agree" with others to avoid anger and disappointment towards me 6, when I see troubled people online, I start to feel horrible too. Sort of like 2 but instead with media.
It's important to mention about media that people sometimes cling to characters who are put thru similar trauma to their own, and that seeing them overcome can help when dealing with their own feelings. Which is why some people may have emotional reactions to seeing a character change if they'd felt connected to or empathic over them.
I suffered bullying on primary school, when bullying wasn't considered a problem. The school chose to blame me for it (although I must say, sometimes it was me who started trouble), bullys never got punished. I remember I was kinda sociable and wanted to make friend when I was a little child. When at high school, I became someone defensive and lonely. Now I'm 21, at uni, and I'm extremely shy, introverted and asocial. I completely lack social skills, I really struggle to make friends, and I avoid going outside (shopping, to the bank, etc.) as much as I can. I've gone to psychologists pretty much my entire life, yet I still can't get over that. I'm trying myself to be a bit more sociable, but I find it extremely difficult. Socializing takes me lots of mental effort, so I just prefer to destinate those efforts to studying. I relate to #4 and #5 as well.
@@firerams_and_arisinglion the thing is, I think it's got to a point that it's interfering with my life, so that's why I'm trying to improve my social skills a little bit. But yeah, I'm ok being just on my own 90% of the time
Same, but I'm still a teen, and it was my old school, I've changed to a better school last year, I will be going to high school. I'm sorry to hear about you're experience, I hope you Find it more easy to be social in the future.
I'm torn between avoiding conflicts and ending the conflicts on my terms, sometimes. This is because sometimes, I wanted to just be left alone. But sometimes, I was being provoked to the point that I wanted to grab the other party by neck and throw the aggressor away. Have anyone ever feel something like this before?
@@lerneanlion I try to disengage from the conversation before I do or say something I regret. and then I just wrote down how I felt in that moment and it helps me calm down and understand my feelings better
I've experienced lots of trauma in my life, but I deal with something pretty much everyday that I'm not too sure what it is, considering that I don't have anyone to comfortably talk to, im not gonna go ahead and say that I think it's trauma but it definitely affected me. Around 4 years years ago from when im writing this comment, I moved cities. Being my childy self at first when I heard my family was moving, I was excited. But as time passed more and more reaching to the day my family moved, I opened my eyes more to realize how saddening this would be for me. On the day we moved, I was in our car crying to stay in the beautiful city that I grew up in with people I loved. When I reached my new city, everything was gloomy. The bright sun and happiness that I was used to seeing was replaced with days of cloudiness and me feeling like nothing, but trying to be happy. And a few days after, I couldn't even celebrate my birthday without sadness since everyone I loved that I wanted to invite were hours away and would never see me again. I'd go on with how much my life degraded from that point but that's not what I'm meaning to talk about. Now for 4 years straight, every single day, almost every moment, I always get a memory or strike of nostalgia from the back of my mind. I have pretty bad eating problems and almost everything makes me sick, but the only food that I like to eat, I have to avoid because they all give me nostalgia. I can't listen to many certain songs I know and love because the reason I love them in the end is because they give me nostalgia, even songs that come out as happy, and in situations where I'm in extremely dark times and thoughts, I only play them then just to numb myself up. I can't watch certain movies or scenes because they will remind me or FULLY REPRESENT my pain, a big example is Inside Out. I would never dare to watch that movie with the life of me. And lastly, I can't go to certain places. Well ... this one's hard. Because it's hard to avoid it. Whenever I come across a setting that strikes nostalgia to me, I CAN NOT be there. Or I choose to stay there alone and consult and cry with myself. Once in a while (like once a year or something) me and my family do drive to our old city and meet up with family or for appointments. It pains me to look out the window and see my whole life that I left behind. I even specifically asked my dad to not take certain ways so I don't start tearing up. And lastly, the date. It was August 19 when I moved, so every 19th of August that flew by each year, I'd be extremely moody, have many flashbacks, and most definitely be having meltdowns, I'd also feel in a sorta depressive state for quite a few days surrounding the 19th, so it would affect me greatly. But in conclusion, this affects me so much. It made me cry to sleep so many times, triggered anxiety, stopped me from things I liked, and just punches me everyday. Ive even had thoughts of s3lf h@rm and wanting to d!e because of how much it wouldn't leave me alone. And I never have anyone to talk to because I probably seem too over dramatic. So to my younger self that said this, and I quote: "will this be like a super long vacation!? It sounds fun!! But ... I'm sure we'll come back, right?" Yes. It will be a very very long vacation, and it will be a painful one, but I'll make sure to still get through it, and finish it strong.
Numbers 2,4 & 5 apply to me. I recall one instance a few years ago where my friends and I were at a bar hanging out. At some point in my field of vision a few tables away is this couple having an extremely emotional discussion. At some point the woman starts crying and I remember it completely derailed the conversation I was having with my friends as her emotional distress was causing my stomach to turn with unease, my heart rate increased and my mind went blank. The couple left shortly after but it really put a damper on the evening
One trauma that still remains in my head over years ago is my dad leaving to another country for 'work', when he was actually cheating on my mum. He started this when i was born and the day my mum, sisters and i left the house, they divorced right in front of my eyes while i was packing my things. He was nearly arrested but was okay because my mum refused it. I still have to visit him every fortnight with my stepbrother in his house. Every time something reminds me of him i cant help but think of the negative things that happened in the past.
2,4,5 Growing up with this made me confused of how am I supposed to feel or act towards people. Asking help was never an option when I needed it the most. Avoiding arguments, conflicts, fights gavr me advantages and disadvantages in life. When you get used it, it's hard to remove that part of you.
I still have trouble asking for help. Slowly learning to. Well. Not just asking for help, but expressing wants and needs. Still get tears in my eyes sometimes when I talk about my other dog Leroy. I loved him so much. We put him down October 15, 2020 at 12:27 pm. Still miss him a lot. Since then, I moved out November 1, 2022. Family has Loki the black lab. He’s a big goob, but I don’t see him much. Dad got him two days after Leroy’s passing. I get it. People grieve differently and he didn’t want to wait two weeks or longer again. Even my fiancé said that was too soon
This video popped up two days before the 27th anniversary of my dad's passing. He took his life when I was only five years old. While I would never wish tragedy on anyone, it does help a lot knowing I'm not alone in what I'm feeling.❤
+Psych2GoTv *Thanks for the list o' the triggers for trauma acknowledged and otherwise:* 0:35 *1. Sensations* 1:10 *2. Emotional others* 1:45 *3. Reactions to certain situations* 2:27 *4. Avoidance of assistance* 3:08 *5. Conflict-phobía:* a. Apologizing b. Agreeing c. Accommodating 4:05 *6. Adverse social media* 5:06 *7. Time and anniversaries*
2, 4 and 5 hit home. Not only do i suck at expressing any sort of strong emotions or unheard/unpopular opinions but also I've always shied away from asking for help. I always feel like i don't deserve any help unless i have sth to offer in return. I love giving. It makes me feel validated and also creates space for me to hope that when i need help i can safely ask them without feeling undeserving.
When i was younger i was really close to my grandparents on my 'dads' side but when they were suddenly ripped from my life due to drug abuse i used to cry myself to sleep every night missing them it was horrrible these memories haunt me to this day from realising just how messed up they were and i was oblivious to it this really helped me know what was happening to me back then thank you
I was visiting a friend last month and she accidentally did something that resembled one of my triggers. She hugged me for a solid 10 minutes and apologized for the rest of the night. I am so glad I found her.
I made a mistake ,and I have never missed someone more outside of family ever. Her messy divorce,going to ground once she found a safe place (which was my hope for her) as I knew from my experiences there was more and read the tell. Miss her lots, still luv her to bits as her good side is beautiful, the dark side is terrifying. I just hope she finds the peace she is looking for. I thank this channel in answering so many things on C-PTSD😢
Narcissistic parents, abuse, neglect, forced to make a personality as I was constantly told im a psychopath for not wanting to talk to my family even though when I do they acuse me of manipulation or say I'm wrong.. so I stopped.. Ironically, I speak 6 different languages and I have a loving girl who sees straight through my overly apologetic personality.. my point? That those who are abused have potential above most so long as they channel that pain and sadness into something more. I truly believe anyone is capable of anything. No matter the upbringing, it all comes down to will power, strength, and self awareness. Failure in life is always an option. However, giving up is not..
Some songs , foods ,places and even time of year can bring back alot of different memories some good but others bad but with the help of this Chanel my councillor, friends and family I get the hard times ive also told my councillor about this Chanel in hopes it will help her other clients as well 🥰
I had experienced _"the incident"_ as I called it, when i was 10. and just now i heard something like a police siren, this immediately caused me to have a remembrance of this, which caused this thump in my chest. ( i usually feel this when I'm having emotional break downs or about to have one. ) I grabbed my doll and hugged it until i felt safe. It was the only thing that maded me comfortable. Elly was the only thing i had to keep me safe. I'm glad i had him. He is the only thing that makes me feel appreciated without leaving me. Elly, the elephant doll with tiny frozen pjs, my doll i had since i was a baby, is my emotional doll.
I'm 54 and 2 months into Therapy after being victimized by my conniving and vindictive mother and the realization that she's a narcissist. I'm coming to grips with the fact that I have childhood trauma that has affected my entire being, I constantly apologize for everything and anything, and I always put other people and their needs ahead of my own even when I know it's going to disrupt my life and I don't let the person know but in the rare occasions when I do they don't seem to care so I end up putting them before me because I feel their needs are more important than my own. I hate confrontation and if someone is angry and yelling it doesn't have to be towards me it still scares the shit out of me especially if it's someone with some type of authority.
Oh wow, anniversaries? Talk about hitting home! Last year, it was 40 years ago (Winter/Spring) that I was classmates with the first boy my heart had ever truly gone out to. One small act of kindness had set the tone permanently, so even after I had gotten carried away and lost any chance to have his friendship, my heart beat just for him no matter how he treated me. I was the unpopular one to begin with, and the one always being teased and verbally degraded by others. He joined in and it hurt, but negative attention was still better than none. I acted out, figuring I had nothing to lose anyway. I left that school, wearing the proverbial scarlet letter. (didn’t help that I was catching a lot of grief at home, as well) Was I _triggered_ by the realization of 40 years past, per se? I guess it just depends on how you define it. I didn't have any panic attacks, but old feelings came back and (on my own time) I've had a few emotional moments. I'm still praying to God that He places us on the same path once again, and that I may have a chance to reconcile with him. Thankfully, that "scarlet letter" fades over time, as I managed to patch things up with the one female classmate who was very kind to me, and when I had the audacity to reach out to one of the most prominent school bullies upon seeing his name in MySpace, he had apologized for how he had treated me and told of some of his trials since then. I've never been one for grudges, so I was just glad that we were able to make peace. Besides, of the people that take an express effort to forgive, none of them are classmates.
Having experienced a lot of neglect due to a disabled sibling and a male centered household where my stepdad and younger brothers, one disabled and one not, were the main focus, I have the overwhelming desire to comfort people. When I see someone is really upset it's ahrd not to jump right in and comfort them, whether they want it or not. I never really got comforted so really good hugs from my partners can sometimes make me suddenly emotional.
Also I have a lot of trouble asking for help. I spent almost a year not telling my partners how much i was struggling the year after I lost a beloved uncle. It also felt like no one ever did anything to help me when i was dealing with the neglect. They'd take me places and do things but I the emotional support I needed, was never given.
I have some of everything mentioned. Yelling or a trigger word would make me cowar and apologize (which I do alot) and in rare instances I would snap back but only when I'm stressed or under pressure. Being left behind is another trigger that I have. I use to cry and get upset "now" (ever since high school) I am watching out for people I am with, example: classmate if on a school trip or family if with family (du) and I know that ok, we're still good. If I get separated I usually find someone and stick with them until we find everyone. I noticed that when a co-worker is mad or nothing is in her favor abs she's getting frustrated. I feel my body tense, curl up. I feel scared. I go quiet (I mean I'm naturally a quiet person) , preferring to work as far away as I could trying to stay out of her way. Otherwise we're chill and I respect her being the oldest and most knowledgeable of the work place. Another example, is my manager bringing the whole "we're a family" thing it made me uncomfortable and almost pushed me away. For Christmas, she gave me stain- glass flowers that represented everyone in the department I work in. I mean they're beautiful and I love them... but the sentiment behind it made me uncomfortable. Maybe it was because I knew the trick she was trying to pull by videos or other work places showing kindness to brainwash then flipping and getting annoyed over time and I don't want that to happen again because that was the worst three years working waitress/ dishwasher and working that job made me feel like I was working to slow at my job which shows in this job doesn't help that I think I have anxiety because I drill myself when I do anything wrong and my mind will remember.
I was mentally abused by my narcissist mother when i was 4 up until i was 12 after my mother died. I am 27 now and being an adult is so hard for me because of my childhood and being in an abusive relationship for so long which lasted from when i was 17 to 25. The guy i dated never loved me and he was so mean to me behind my back and was a very controlling guy. The relationship ended finally after so long and now i am happy with my new partner, but my past oftten triggers painful memories for me and i have no way of coping. It hurts me so bad to have been lied to, believing that my mother was a loving caring individual but in actuality she was mean and abusive to me. I was lied to my whole life which finding out the truth is so painful to take. I was brain washed by my mother, she acted nice but also mean as well which comfused the young me so much, but now as an adult i figured her out that she was nothing but a fake and selfish person.
Nice video I'm 16 and totally disconnected with my family, I have few friends to talk to somewhat lonely, No one believes in me and i Dream to become successful and wealthy once I'm 18 and move out I'll burn down the past forever and pursue my future dream
Geez, the second one hit hard. I didn't really question why I often retreated into a shell or else felt panicked whenever someone got really angry or upset. I always felt really guilty afterwards for not doing anything to help them, even though I knew I should, I didn't understand why I kept panicking whenever someone had an emotional breakdown. But it makes a lot more sense now, ty!
Just so you know i wach these videos every day and thay help me so much in my pathetic life this gives me so much comfort and confidence i just wanted to say a big thank you to psych2go for being like a personal therapist for me in ruff times so i just wanna say thank you so SO much ❤😊
I've burst into tears before because of teachers(specifically make so far) yelling at me. I then try to hide it as my dad would always yell at me becAuse of the fact that I would cry.
A lot of people nowadays have zero tolerance and don't care for others' past truamas... it's sad but the usual especially in the USA. Therapy isn't always the answer to everything either is medicine for traumas that happened at a very tender age of early development.
My family doesn't allow me to go to therapy :/ my mom said "pray it will help u" and my dad say "no u're fine u're not crazy" yes my dad thinks depression means someone lost their brain or crazy
Number 2 is a big one for me! I was not allowed to feel sad/weak to cry to feel depressed. So whenever my wife is feeling this way I don’t knw what to say or do. On the inside I wanna say suck it up because that’s what I always heard. 😢😢
No no, you as a MAN has to suck it up. Let your wife cry and support her, she is a woman and she can't help it. You have to suppress your emotions and be strong.
I have taken on the mentality for myself that showing emotion is a weakness. I only hold my self to this. When my friends have a breakdown, I rush to help even though I feel terrible.
It's astounding how much I relate to these. I remember always avoiding conflict or people who are yelling because of my trauma. Especially when the parents yelling turns into getting hit with a belt 10 times, getting threatened to be tied up or thrown in a sack, getting thrown in a garbage can, etc.
My mom once told me my dad left us when I was 4 years old, at 17. And because of that, I feel like if I got into a relationship with a man, I'm afraid that he would leave me for good and never apologize or look back, just like my dad never did. That's why I prefer to be friends with men instead of more. Because you get hurt a lot less when you're friends only with a man.
I realised recently that a certain coworker last year reminded me a lot of my childhood bullies and people I struggled with. Pretty sure he triggered me a lot. after finishing the video, I fit 4 of these.
Something I never thought would hit close to home was two and three, when I was in sophomore year almost everyone was yelling. I didn't notice how obvious I was visibly uncomfortable, my teacher did. She asked if I was ok, I told her I was the noise was bothering me. Thankfully she made everyone quiet down, as a kid yelling was common at home. As for three I used to get really uncomfortable around any adult, mainly because I thought they would verbally abuse me. I managed to get along with my new at the time teachers because they were very understanding
The fact is that the last one is a big one as well as not asking for help and avoiding conflict, because my parents argued a lot when i was a kid and, with fathers day tomorrow I can't really spend father's day since my dad is gone since 2018 and I say sorry and blame myself because of all that happened in my life
⚠️ trauma dump ⚠️ When I was a kid I wanted to solve my families problems and fix my siblings relationships with each other. It was a lot of responsibility and I took it all upon myself. I think I felt like if I did that I would be more worthy of love. As the oldest of four I rarely got much attention from my parents. My three younger siblings were all very controlling and if things didn’t go their way they would get angry and fight. They would have heated arguments over a goddamn piece of paper. For whatever reason I’ve always felt a lot different from them. Even when I was a little kid I was more likely to give in than cause a fight. This became a problem because I was often ignored. Maybe I hoped that if I got my siblings to stop fighting all the time I would be able to get the things I wanted every now and then instead of constantly being pushed aside because I wasn’t problematic Whatever the case, I was constantly trying to get my siblings to get along. I would try to step in and mediate their fights. Sometimes my parents would be angry with me for parenting them, saying I wasn’t in a position to do that. Other times they would get angry when I left during a fight because they wanted my help. I wanted my siblings to stop fighting so bad. I tried so hard for so long to make sure everyone was happy at all times. We were all homeschooled and the time so I was always at home with them pretty much. If we went somewhere we all went. I did enjoy playing with them and stuff. I have fond memories of those days. But constantly being on edge trying to make sure nothing would make my siblings angry was really draining. The more I did the more my parents expected me to do because it just became the norm. Their fighting upset me a lot. It really hurt me to hear two people I loved saying such god awful things to each other and not only yelling but screaming at the top of their lungs. I learned to self isolate and hide myself in my room it the bathroom because it got to the point where I just couldn’t handle it emotionally. I also adopted toxic positivity as a coping mechanism, probably because it was a counter to all the anger around me. I was hurt a lot by other’s negative emotions so I wanted to rid them both from myself and from others. I wasn’t very self aware at the time (while I am EXTREMELY self aware now) and I think it’s because I didn’t allow myself to think or feel certain things. As I got older I had more school to do and was able to use that as an excuse to escape my siblings and isolate myself. I focused really hard on being successful with school in high school. Summers were really difficult for me because I didn’t have that escape. I was so burnt out between my family and school that I had a breakdown during my senior year of high school. I thought it was just senioritis but I had another breakdown during the summer. I went on a family vacation and my dad got really mad at me and yelled at me and even spanked me once while we were there. I was 18. He had no right to do that. Mom said they were thinking of taking my car away because I couldn’t pay for it myself. She said dad was saying I was acting entitled but she knew I was struggling. Thanks for telling me that and yet doing absolutely nothing to help my situation mom. Sometimes I felt like I was the only one that actually cares to solve any of the damn family problems. I started going to college and still was burnt out as hell. I don’t spend nearly as much time with my siblings anymore because I literally don’t have the emotional energy to deal with their crap. I had another breakdown that spring, although it was of a different nature. I’d been struggling with identity for a while since I gave up my identity as a child to expend all my efforts to help my family. I started to question everything and just had a terrible breakdown. I felt like I had wasted my entire life. I practically killed myself trying to solve my families problems but I did absolutely nothing but dig myself into a hole. I was also so burnt out and unmotivated I couldn’t function. I failed my midterms because of that. Then I got back on my feet and studied really hard and was able to make up for the failed midterms. This summer I spent a lot of time to myself just not doing anything trying to feel less burnt out. I’m so miserable and bored and lonely but I always self isolate. I didn’t even acknowledge my resume until recently. I always thought I had an amazing childhood because I kept comparing it to people who were abused or abandoned or had parents who fought all the time. My parents have a really good relationship. But it’s my siblings that fought all the time. I love my family. I know they didn’t mean what they did to me. And that’s why it took me so long to acknowledge what I had been through. I’m happy to say I’m in a better place now. I’m not happy but I’m not forcing myself to act happy. I still self isolate but I’m trying my best to stop. It’s going to be difficult but I think I’m finally going the right direction
As someone who has been diagnosed with PTSD I have had experiences with all these symptoms. I was raised in a neglectful household. I'll keep it brief, but basically I had witnessed violence, drug abuse, and was not taken care of well for the first 10 years of my life (as of right now I am 17). Asking for help is a huge problem, especially in school, I've struggled with grades because of it. Also, I notably retained the explicit detail of how marijuana smells. Also certain things remind me of certain events. Now though I live in a safe place, with people who I love, and I've gone through counseling, I've grown healthier and happier through the years. To whoever is still struggling, I encourage you to reach out and ask for help if you can. It's scary, but you can do it. :) ❤
Tbh sometimes I question whether my past should be considered trauma, but basically my family fought alot, but I wasn't involved in the fights, but I know they were bad. My family doesn't swear but when they fought they did. And I remember my brother getting hurt often during them, and sometimes my dad would storm out. At one point he tried to leave actually, and now that has given me abandonment issues, but it only happened like last year. Would this be considered trauma or no? Also I'm glad you are better now, it's good to hear your not deeply affected ☺️
I have a few spots in town that makes me uneasy, one was a car crash, the hospital, my childhood home but that would be a lot of people as well, at the end of the year i get so depressed because my mother passed away close to the end and I can’t do Christmas anymore either, thx for letting me tell my story
When I come across conflicts I tend to ether avoid or go overboard due to family being abusive, I also hate showing my true emotions and getting emotional due to only one family member really keeping me safe emotionally, not to mention others in this. I might need therapy.😅
****trigger warning: animal unwellness 0:45 so this is so eerie; I'm a veterinary technician and literally yesterday had a really bad situation with a pitty mama that had a huge open wound/ruptured mass on her belly and she was so dirty and smelled like my childhood home (hoarding, BO, and overall ick) BUT OF COURSE SHE WAS SO SWEET 😭 and I swore I was just being sensitive 😢 but nope. Thanks Psych 🥺
When I watched the one about how some avoid help because they feel helpless and worthless, it reminded me of how my grandmother always said I was helpless and couldn't do anything by myself. I was 7 years old at the time and didn't understand, now I suffer from a lot of different problems and no one except my friends knows about it.
When I was about 12 years old I was watching a movie on lifetime about the mind forgetting trauma and while I was watching that movie a childhood molestation that happened to me was brought back to my memory that I had completely forgot for years I questioned if it was a dream until the person who did it told someone I knew what they had done to me and they told me and then I know for sure that it wasn't a dream. After that the memories started becoming really clear to me to the point where I remember every single little detail where it happened and everything.
#2 hits hard. Talking with most people in casual setting is unpleasant, and even moderately emotional moments are unbearable to the point that i can't act normal and get in trouble. Also main reason why i prefer reading to watching movies.
1:14 I was in like 4th grade when this kid started yelling at the person across from him and I burst into tears and I didn't know why. _That explains a lot..._
My dad was emotionally absent during my childhood and i only got to see him for a few minutes in the morning and to say goodnight. Because of this i get triggered when i hear this one song from Mozart Baby, about the dad bull that leaves the baby cow alone, i still cry whenever i hear it to this day.
I always use music to process my emotions. Sometimes, when I'm feeling vulnerable, I need to avoid certain genres, while some other times I NEED to do the opposite to confront certain feelings. Even if listening to a song causes me to cry, it's one of the few ways I can finally acknowledge my emotions and start to move on. Sometimes it happens with positive amotions that make me hyperfocus on things too much, too. Music helps me get mentally unstuck so much...
When I would break down as a child I'm front of my mom, she would stop would she was doing to hold me and I learned how to dry away other people's tears because she would do it for me and she always encouraged me to speak my mind in her words so my thoughts wouldn't eat me alive according to her and it helped so much 🙏🏾💓. I lovey mom, she gave me thee emotional support no one else gave her growing up as a kid but she said she felt loved
She allowed herself to crack open and fall apart in front of me, 💞 so I took the example and became extremely honest about myself as I grew up just like she did
I've started therapy, it's too early to judge but, it's actually talking and they told me that each of us holds the key to their own healing inside them somewhere, hope it's going to work...
Watching this video, I realized I experience these signs everyday cuz I've been Emotionally and Verbally Abused by my dad, it is really uncomfortable dealing with the trauma.
This whole video just put the things that I couldnt explain into words. There was a certain deodarant that my uncle used to wear (he was the main cause of my trauma) and my aunt's new boyfriend wore it once, and my memories came flooding in before I could process what the smell even was. I get memories when people shout, even if it isn't directed at me. I'm now in secondary school, so there will be a lot more shouting, so therefore I feel stressed and anxious more as well. When we drive past an area that looks familiar, memories come back. I avoid help wherever I can so that they don't think I'm weak or pathetic, since that was what i was called when i needed it. I absolutely *will not* engage with conflict, as I get scared and anxious at the person that is conflicting with me. Some beauty videos or people with makeup and showy clothing on social media makes me more prone to intrusive and su!c!dal thoughts, and being reminded that I'm a failure, since I'm not like normal girls, or just normal people in general. I don't like makeup, i don't like dressing up, and i don't interact with people so i only have one good friend. All of my relationships have ended because my exes think I'm too introverted, or they've just made excuses, saying that they wanna focus on schoolwork or they are trying to protect me from their friends, only to get another girlfriend literally a week later (no exaggeration) and one even cheated on me. I feel like I need a boyfriend so then I feel good about myself since I have someone that I "know" truly loves me. My aunt and uncle's birthdays have just passed, and seeing the date on that day made me upset and angry. My reaction to trauma is mainly anger, so i just go silent and try to hold it in. People also dont listen to me at all, and since I'm in foster care and have just gotten out of my traumatic situation, the biggest thing I need right now is someone that listens to me. My social workers don't listen to me, my siblings find it awkward when I try to start this type of conversation, and I'm scared to tell people in my class, and my friend, because I dont want them to dislike me. I'm getting an advocate - basically someone that will listen to what you have to say and voice them - and i couldn't be happier. I'm working on my insecurities, anxiety and social anxiety, and I have a thing that I'm starting to do where I move around a lot when I'm stressed or upset, and I'm working on that. Hopefully I'll get there :) And I've just realised how long this is 😬 Thanks if you read this whole thing, at least someone cares about what i have to say, that makes me feel good 😊
Much of my childhood was filled with constant reminders that i wasn't good enough.. that it was stupid to cry, and leaving difficult situations was 'running away'.. as a child I had doubts about a certain family member, and struggled speaking my thoughts with others, other then on paper. A family member would often find those notes first, and yell at me about them. Whenever I didn't do a good enough job on chores, they'd get mad at me and make me redo them. I ran away from home twice because I couldn't handle it all, amd that same family member used that information against me. I used to get panic attacks whenever I heard a male adult yell at or fight with someone else, and I'm afraid of making others mad because of my childhood. My mother never really realized anything bad was happening to me, and since I was her first child I doubt she really knew how this family member's words affected me. I usually try to stop myself from crying, or hide away from others and cover my mouth to stop the noise. I dislike crying infront of others, because it makes me feel like a burden. I even remember the family member telling my mother that they felt like I was in the way of their relationship. My own mother doesn't even remember that, yet that day is engraved into my memory..
I've never liked people yelling since it has reminded me of my dad's temper. He's better with it now and I have gotten counciling for my PTSD, stress, and anxiety, but I still can't handle people yelling since I go completely quiet as I curl up in a ball for hours on end, a defense mechanism I've had since I was a kid because I was always afraid of making people upset.
i really relate to no, 1 and 4 bc i had a certain situation that i wish not to disclose that involved a certain sound and it traumatized me... and for no. 4 its bc when i was younger my mom, if i broke smth or lost smth she wouldnt be like "its fine i'll help you look" or "its okay we all make mistakes" she would just get angry and say that i dont take care of my stuff and it rlly hurt me a lot
and also number 6 bc i watch a lot of true crime and see a lot of things abt death and it really scares me bc it reminds me that im going to lose ppl who are special to me and that im gonna lose smth special of mine aka my life
Memories from my childhood, results in trauma, where there's this thought on how was it possible that I made it out. I still have from the past, I'm still very cautious about what I do in my life, now that I'm an adult. Most of the trauma is from how people treated me, because it seemed like they saw something about me, that I acknowledged as something that wasn't anything new in my life. It was stressful, painful and awkward in my childhood.
What are some of your childhood trauma?
Oh honey, I have a whole dictionary of trauma
Mental and physical abuse at home not having anyone who understands so just keeping things inside
I'm not sure... Maybe because of 2020, i forgot this year and i think that's a big problem-- i'm not sure tho haha 😅
oh man where to begin….one time i had lost my favorite rubber ducky 😢, and then my mom tried to give me another one but she just couldn’t understand the importance of the first one…
Childhood sexual abuse, a violent rape at 12, a narcissistic husband who abandoned me homeless, a mother who gave everything to the son nothing to the daughters. I was ignored, laughed at, called names, had to grow myself into a person that one died.
When someone has an emotional breakdown in front of me it always makes me so uncomfortable because as a child I was always told that it was not appropriate to express your emotions in front of people. I usually just don't know how to respond or how to comfort them and end up feeling extremely guilty.
Thank you for sharing something so personal with us. Despite feeling uncomfortable, it sounds to me like you deeply care about the people who express themselves to you. I think being honest about how you feel with the people who share can be very helpful for you. Letting them know that you don't exactly know how to respond when people share their feelings but still telling them that you're listening will help people feel that even though you don't know how to exactly help, you're willing to lend an ear. I hope that this will give you a good start.
ik how u feel, people complaining, whining or being rlly sad or happy just makes me so uncomfortable, it just feels like weird gooey feeling and i hate it. i would get laughed at or judged by my parents for openly expressing such emotions, now see other people do it is so foreign to me.
@@Psych2go Thank you so much for the advice ❤
I will definitely try to be more honest about it but i'm scared that I might get judged for it
I can relate completely, it sucks.
i do the same thing and i just panic and spiral out of guilt for not reacting right
The fact that I was about to cry over a memory I’ve had when I was a kid and this popped up… cool
Thank you for sharing your personal experience with us. Have you sought therapy regarding your childhood memory? How are you doing now?
Me too
Everytime I look at the road i nearly cry
(I don't cuz I'm a maaaan-😂) no
I nearly cry cuz i see the good not nice friend that i had that not threatens me everytime I see them and it's pretty not good cuz he's MY NEIGHBOR. NEIGHBOR
but ye i hope your ok and ye good day to yall
I remember my dad coming home drunk fighting with everyone at home and throwing me around
or even that year when he was drunk again and when I tried to distract myself, he grabbed my hair and pulled me from the bedroom into the living room.
@@CyberSZ I’m really sorry that happened :(. I hope you recover from that.
Oh no, I’ve been feeling this a lot lately but I brush it off saying I’m being dramatic 😭
0:35 - 1. Sensations
1:10 - 2. Being with people who are emotional
1:45 - 3. Reactions to certain places and people
2:27 - 4. Avoiding help, even when you need it
3:08 - 5. Avoiding conflict at all costs
4:04 - 6. The media you consume
5:06 - 7. Time & anniversaries
Thank you✨✨!!
One trauma that took me several years to get over was when my dad beat me 47 times in a row with a belt. I couldn't be around guys or even be touched by them without having an anxiety attack. It's been 5 years though and while the reaction is not as bad I'm still uncomfortable around middle aged guys (cause my dad is middle-aged so I guess it's like a trigger).
Edit: some added info. He got arrested for it and my grandma had to bail him out. So I lived with my grandma for a year and a half for my 8th grade year and some of the summer.
I’m so sorry to hear that.
I’m very sorry. I can’t ever imagine that and I’m sorry that you went through that live changing trauma.
Im so sorry to hear that. I had a dear friend tell me some of the things she endured. I cry knowing such a good person was made broken by such evil.
Omg I’m sorry to hear that
Sorry to hear you went through that, it’s horrible :-( your experience is a bit relatable to me. I was SA’d by tweens/teens and I hate that age group
The book "Origins of You" by Vienna Pharaon is a must read for whoever wants to dig into childhood trauma and family patterns 🙌
Thanks for the suggestion! Is this somewhat similar to "The Untethered Soul" by Michael Alan Singer?
@@Psych2go I would say it's more specific. The author deconstructs behaviour patterns and relate them to what she considers to be the 5 (curiously) main childhood wound types. It is a great read. So is your work 🙏♥️
The fire in my childhood house when I was 13, my aunt dying in 2004, my dad incarcerated, my mother dying in front of me in 2009. Not having many friends growing up and going to many schools in Baltimore, Maryland. These are the sources of my trauma.
Jesus I Am so sorry like....so so sorry no one should ever have to go through that I really hope your doing better now
I hope you're doing better I'm so sorry
My Mother is also a Capricorn person ♑🐐 too & plus I haven't got a chance to get on with her at all. Just literally because she has been very harsh towards me & even as well by being so judgemental/manipulative towards me due, with my "high" functioning mild autism that I was actually born with in real life too indeed. But the very saddest truth is that I don't love my mom at all just literally because she does tend to provokes me, or by criticizing, & even as well by actually trying to belittle all of my dreams in a very negative & a very unhealthy ways too sweetie. Like also in fact that I wasn't not actually allowed to make messes & even by making all of those types small mistakes too as well indeed. And so that also explains why that I haven't been able to reach out my mom on the phone just literally because she has over crossed the line with me for the final of the 14 strikes in total that she has really pulled on me of this first & final time like in real life too sweetie. Like ever since when I was an 8 year old little girl like in fact about the whole incident that has happened to me like ever since when it was on October 31st which in the year of 2008 just quite literally just until like in the the month of September which was actually on the 22nd like in the year of 2022 too as well sweetie. Like did also involves by invading my personal space, & even as well by taking away all of my personal belongings that I had specifically brought with my very hard-working money too by placing in the trash without my permission repeatedly. My mom does not tend to do those types of wicked stuff like towards my two siblings which are her two other grown-up children's of course just like that she would always do that to me like pretty much too indeed . And plus I was also born as a Leo♌🦁 person too but at the exact same time that I could also be a Libra ♎⚖️ person too indeed. Like in fact that I am also a very loving, kind, caring, gentle & a very passionate human being that does not deserve to be treated that way like in fact that it is also not my obligated to sit there just to literally take that all of those types of toxic abuse/behaviors from my mother just literally because I am also just a very highly sensitive person too sweetie. And plus I am also going to be getting myself a new job & so this way that I could move out from the toxic environment away from my mother too immediately. Just literally because every child at any age does not deserve to be treated that way like in fact that she could of also approached to me like in a different type of response like that involves by helping me with organizing my bedroom properly but in a very positive ways with a lot of praises & even with a lot of encouragements like pretty much like towards too as well. But instead of actually by doing a lot of negative things towards me like that involves by yelling directly 😤😠😡😞😭😢💔 💔💔💔at me right in front of my very beautiful lovely gorgeous face & even as well by taking all of my personal belongings that I have specifically brought with my very hard-working money once again by placing them in the trash without my permission repeatedly. And plus I am also the middle born child out of my two siblings with is my older brother who is actually two years apart from me & I even do have a sister who is actually five years younger than me too also in adulthood too indeed. I am also very extremely proud of myself for staying strong 💪🏽 & very most beautiful lovely wise upbringing, mature young girl/lady for all those types of pains that I ever had to go through like pretty much my whole entire life for over the past 15 years now. Like in fact that I am also technically 23 which means that I my birthday is actually coming up pretty soon like on the 9th of August which is actually going to be this current year of 2023 just quite literally because that I was actually born in the year of 2000 too in real life too as well indeed. And plus I did found this video very interesting for me to watch today. Thank you so much for sharing this very Excellent comment to my very sweet loving kind friend. sending you a lot of prayers 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽 & a very big nice warm hug from your very sweet loving kind sister friend Chaleika. 🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸
Im so so so sorry to hear that i feel very bad for you :(
@@Cat.12345. well thank you much very for your very kind words & your support from you my very sweet loving kind friend & I really do appreciate that from you too as well indeed. And plus I really do need a hug right now 😭😢💔 to get all of things from off my system right at now at this breaking point just quite literally because my very disgraceful mother has been treating me very terribly for over the past like 15 years now. Like in fact that I really do need to get a job that does require a full payment job for a person with special needs which also means that I was actually born with mild autism too in real life too sweetie.
#7 hits me hard. As a child I was wrongly put in the ER and mental hospitals by my mother. Those terrible places gave me PTSD. I was in a mental hospital on my birthday 4 years ago and because of that I hate my birthday. My birthday was a few days ago and I’ve been more irritable and on edge than usual. I felt anger for the people who wronged me.
Are you me?
Cuz as a kid I wasn't the most well behaved, had tantrums like any other kid... But somehow that got interpreted as me being developmentally disabled, ADHD, autistic, something not mentally well. I was put on meds at 5 for tantrums & never got out of the mental health arena till just a year ago when a group home that my high school I lived in set up for me forced me out with their absolutely untenable rules. Emotional neglect, wrongful treatment, birthdays ruined for a long, long time?
Yeah... That's me too... I feel you m8, I feel you...
@@neetard7360 same, I have ADHD and autism and 22 other disorders but people, including my family and classmates, always said that it was behavioral issues and that it was just “my personality”
I only have 2 friends but they are both loyal and understand me since they also have disorders. Not as much as me though 😅
@@neetard7360 omg. i’ve been put on meds since I was 6. Around that time
i was diagnosed with ADHD but didn’t find out until a few years later. my anger issues were bad staring at 8 years old. the thing is i would only get violent at my mom’s house and school, never with my dad. my parents divorced when i was 3 and i was in joint custody. my mom’s house was a terrible environment. she didn’t understand me and when i was 11 the “experts” finally pulled their heads out of their butts and realized if i live with my dad full time, i wouldn’t get violent. i’m 15 now and i haven’t attacked anyone in years. even tho i no longer have anger issues, i’m left with anxiety, depression and PTSD.
@@idkanymore9894 My Mother is also a Capricorn person ♑🐐 too & plus I haven't got a chance to get on with her at all. Just literally because she has been very harsh towards me & even as well by being so judgemental/manipulative towards me due, with my "high" functioning mild autism that I was actually born with in real life too indeed. But the very saddest truth is that I don't love my mom at all just literally because she does tend to provokes me, or by criticizing, & even as well by actually trying to belittle all of my dreams in a very negative & a very unhealthy ways too sweetie. Like also in fact that I wasn't not actually allowed to make messes & even by making all of those types small mistakes too as well indeed. And so that also explains why that I haven't been able to reach out my mom on the phone just literally because she has over crossed the line with me for the final of the 14 strikes in total that has she really pulled on me like in real life too sweetie. Like ever since when I was an 8 year old little girl like in fact about the whole incident that has happened to me like ever since when it was on October 31st which in the year of 2008 just quite literally just until like in the the month of September which was actually on the 22nd like in the year of 2022 too as well sweetie. Like did also involves by invading my personal space, & even as well by taking away all of my personal belongings that I had specifically brought with my very hard-working money too by placing in the trash without my permission repeatedly. My mom does not tend to do those types of wicked stuff like towards my two siblings which are her two other grown-up children's of course just like that she would always do that to me like pretty much too indeed . And plus I was also born as a Leo♌🦁 person too but at the exact same time that I could also be a Libra ♎⚖️ person too indeed. Like in fact that I am also a very loving, kind, caring, gentle & a very passionate human being that does not deserve to be treated that way like in fact that it is also not my obligated to sit there just to literally take that all of those types of toxic abuse/behaviors from my mother just literally because I am also just a very highly sensitive person too sweetie. And plus I am also going to be getting myself a new job & so this way that I could move out from the toxic environment away from my mother too immediately. Just literally because every child at any age does not deserve to be treated that way like in fact that she could of also approached to me like in a different type of response like that involves by helping me with organizing my bedroom properly but in a very positive ways with a lot of praises & even with a lot of encouragements like pretty much like towards too as well. But instead of actually by doing a lot of negative things towards me like that involves by yelling directly 😤😠😡😞😭😢💔 💔💔💔at me right in front of my very beautiful lovely gorgeous face & even as well by taking all of my personal belongings that I have specifically brought with my very hard-working money once again by placing them in the trash without my permission repeatedly. And plus I am also the middle born child out of my two siblings with is my older brother who is actually two years apart from me & I even do have a sister who is actually five years younger than me too also in adulthood too as well indeed. I am also very extremely proud of myself for staying strong 💪🏽 & a very most beautiful lovely wise upbringing, mature young girl/lady for all those types of pains that I ever had to go through like pretty much my whole entire life for over the past 15 years now. Like in fact that I am also technically 23 which means that I my birthday is actually coming up pretty soon like on the 9th of August which is actually going to be this current year of 2023 just quite literally because that I was actually born in the year of 2000 too in real life too as well indeed. And plus I did found this video very interesting for me to watch today. Thank you so much for sharing this very Excellent comment to my very sweet loving kind friend. sending you a lot of prayers 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽 & a very big nice warm hug from your very sweet loving kind sister friend Chaleika. 🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸🥀🌸🌸
what was the reason why?!?
I was around the age of a toddler. Like most toddlers, I was curious about things, like the washing machine my aunt was using to do laundry. I don't remember what happened because the next thing I know, my aunt was screaming at me. Her tone and words rattled me quite badly. To this day, I still can't stand it when people speak to me in a harsh and accusatory tone (while occasionally belittling me). If I hear that tone again, I'll instinctively shrink. It's quite common for my parents/relatives to use that unbearable tone if they are dissatisfied with something. To me, it's all about asserting dominance/control and reminding the younger ones that they've disappointed/angered/annoyed the former. In my family, parents also don't defend their kids against verbally abusive relatives. I used to feel guilty for hiding and avoiding some of my relatives because I was brought up to always greet my relatives properly regardless of how they treated me. It took a while but I've decided to ignore certain people to avoid terrifying my inner child.
This sounds like middle eastern kind of family
I've got a trigger just from this. My father told me very harsh words about 2 years ago. Whenever someone's mean to me, being harsh, yelling, or accusing me of something my anxiety goes crazy and I start shaking like heck. It's not as bad as it was but I still shake in fear in those situations.
@@tiffhasarrived smh, what's with the adults screaming and belittling the younger ones
@@janecelee1713 adults think they’re better because they’re… adults. But they’re just little egotistic freaks
This reminded me of my childhood and my teenage years as well, but the one who screamed at me is my older sister.
I hate how a lot of people are invalidated with their trauma just because you have the basic necessities of life. All these people suffering and people ignore their pleas for help just because they appear to be “fine”. Trauma is viewed as being “dramatic” to many brain dead clowns I’ve encountered. Asking for help to better yourself is “selfish” to many and it’s “weak”. If only people had love they would take the time out to learn instead of choosing if to be ignorant.
That's why my trauma keeps continuing. My dad's a "good provider" and therefore a good person and *I'm* bad for being "ungrateful" to someone who has been psychologically abusing me my entire life.
Post partem jealousy rage need to be treated and I am adopted and older simply told the brat no and I get call a horrible person and treated like I am mentally disabled since I was 3 I had grandma protecting from the worst of it until she passed away the day before my 13th birthday and after that things got worse my diploma was held back for 3 years so they could put in 2 programs for people with mental disabilities I fear being put in group home for people with mental disabilities now figuring out how to move out while unemployed and can't drive and come up with a bissness of my own so I can make money behind their backs so I can save money and get a boat license and boat to live on because it mobile and cheaper than rent and mortgage I have had things taken smashed throughout or just plain handed to the brat and hit punished because the brat would hurt itself and lie even though I was inside and I am still getting called the bully because I said no and the only thing I 99%of the time did was slap the brat in the face with any I got my hands on because boundaries and the doing not okay things
When i was younger my mom used to tell me all about her trauma and the pain that her parents gave her. I felt bad for her but it also made me think that my trauma wasnt bad enough for it to be trauma. i told myself that everything that happened to me was not truama but an unfortunate situation and i should be getting over it right now. But i couldnt just get over it. It had a hold on me and wouldn't let go. It took me a longgggg time to heal from it and realize that nobodys trauma is better than others and to stop thinking that my pain was fake bc someone had it a little harder than me.
Timestamps
1). Sensations 0:35
2). Being with people that are emotional 1:10
3). Reactions to certain places and people 1:45
4). Avoiding help even when you need it 2:27
5). Avoiding conflict at all costs 3:08
6). The media you consume 4:05
7). Time and anniversaries 5:06
Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
goober
@@luisconde6201 thanks I guess
Thank you for adding the timestamps!
@@Psych2go not a problem happy to help
What about the rest?
When we were teenagers, my friend would get uncomfortable and frustrated whenever I cried. This triggered MY old trauma because I was always chastised, even yelled at, for being too emotional as a child when I really, *really* could not help my intense feelings. I felt a deep sense of shame about my emotional responses. It's difficult for me to function in this world. I've always struggled with the feeling of inconveniencing others whenever I tear up, even though I don't have as much control over my crying as other people do. Later, I found out that my friend had childhood trauma that revolved around the adults around her using crying as a manipulation tactic. So...yeah...we all got our stuff. I'm really glad we came to understand why we are the way we are.
3:10 This part hits hella hard…this is exactly what I do. I’ve became a lot more sensitive and easy to breakdown as a result of all the trauma I’ve had. I do exactly this, especially since I’m usually a people pleasure, or if I don’t have to talk to people since I’m introverted, I just don’t talk to people and shorten conversations. *Who else has this issue?*
I know it isn’t good to assume everyone is bad but…I am too scared to take chances..
I relate to what you're saying. I'm also very sensitive, a people pleaser, and an introvert that has a hard time talking to people.
Real 🥲
I too, have this issue, lets try and go through this together, maybe some others here too :D
@@Aven_colonthree Thanks for saying that. Even though this world is full of so many people and it's not a surprise some are similar, I've never met or heard of people having the same issue as me. Makes you feel less alone :)
@@Obsessive_15 yea, same :>
This video actually helped me tell my friends, therapist, and soon my teachers and parents so people know how I feel.
I really like your content as it helps me relate to my 5 disorders which are listed below.
(DMDD, ADHD, Autism, Depression, Anxiety.) It really makes me happy that someone like you is telling people to be who you are and to stand up for yourself and to choose the right path. It really does help. Thank You for teaching me these topics because as a teenager myself, it truly helps me learn.
Only in ohio 💀
2, 4, 5, and 6 for me. These are all too relatable..
2, I get very emotional when others are emotional.
4, I avoid asking for help.. nobody deserves to have to put up with my problems
5, I absolutely hate conflict and very often "agree" with others to avoid anger and disappointment towards me
6, when I see troubled people online, I start to feel horrible too. Sort of like 2 but instead with media.
It's important to mention about media that people sometimes cling to characters who are put thru similar trauma to their own, and that seeing them overcome can help when dealing with their own feelings. Which is why some people may have emotional reactions to seeing a character change if they'd felt connected to or empathic over them.
I suffered bullying on primary school, when bullying wasn't considered a problem. The school chose to blame me for it (although I must say, sometimes it was me who started trouble), bullys never got punished. I remember I was kinda sociable and wanted to make friend when I was a little child. When at high school, I became someone defensive and lonely. Now I'm 21, at uni, and I'm extremely shy, introverted and asocial. I completely lack social skills, I really struggle to make friends, and I avoid going outside (shopping, to the bank, etc.) as much as I can. I've gone to psychologists pretty much my entire life, yet I still can't get over that. I'm trying myself to be a bit more sociable, but I find it extremely difficult. Socializing takes me lots of mental effort, so I just prefer to destinate those efforts to studying.
I relate to #4 and #5 as well.
if u dont wanna socialize u dont have to, it aint a problem.
@@firerams_and_arisinglion the thing is, I think it's got to a point that it's interfering with my life, so that's why I'm trying to improve my social skills a little bit. But yeah, I'm ok being just on my own 90% of the time
Same, but I'm still a teen, and it was my old school, I've changed to a better school last year, I will be going to high school. I'm sorry to hear about you're experience, I hope you Find it more easy to be social in the future.
@@martinds38ik I’m late,but can we be internet friends?Lol.♡
I'm torn between avoiding conflicts and ending the conflicts on my terms, sometimes. This is because sometimes, I wanted to just be left alone. But sometimes, I was being provoked to the point that I wanted to grab the other party by neck and throw the aggressor away. Have anyone ever feel something like this before?
I have
@@raincaoimhe And what did you do to the aggressor?
I have it too
@@lizzylemon5551 And what did you do to the one who provoked you?
@@lerneanlion I try to disengage from the conversation before I do or say something I regret. and then I just wrote down how I felt in that moment and it helps me calm down and understand my feelings better
I've experienced lots of trauma in my life, but I deal with something pretty much everyday that I'm not too sure what it is, considering that I don't have anyone to comfortably talk to, im not gonna go ahead and say that I think it's trauma but it definitely affected me. Around 4 years years ago from when im writing this comment, I moved cities. Being my childy self at first when I heard my family was moving, I was excited. But as time passed more and more reaching to the day my family moved, I opened my eyes more to realize how saddening this would be for me. On the day we moved, I was in our car crying to stay in the beautiful city that I grew up in with people I loved. When I reached my new city, everything was gloomy. The bright sun and happiness that I was used to seeing was replaced with days of cloudiness and me feeling like nothing, but trying to be happy. And a few days after, I couldn't even celebrate my birthday without sadness since everyone I loved that I wanted to invite were hours away and would never see me again. I'd go on with how much my life degraded from that point but that's not what I'm meaning to talk about. Now for 4 years straight, every single day, almost every moment, I always get a memory or strike of nostalgia from the back of my mind. I have pretty bad eating problems and almost everything makes me sick, but the only food that I like to eat, I have to avoid because they all give me nostalgia. I can't listen to many certain songs I know and love because the reason I love them in the end is because they give me nostalgia, even songs that come out as happy, and in situations where I'm in extremely dark times and thoughts, I only play them then just to numb myself up. I can't watch certain movies or scenes because they will remind me or FULLY REPRESENT my pain, a big example is Inside Out. I would never dare to watch that movie with the life of me. And lastly, I can't go to certain places. Well ... this one's hard. Because it's hard to avoid it. Whenever I come across a setting that strikes nostalgia to me, I CAN NOT be there. Or I choose to stay there alone and consult and cry with myself. Once in a while (like once a year or something) me and my family do drive to our old city and meet up with family or for appointments. It pains me to look out the window and see my whole life that I left behind. I even specifically asked my dad to not take certain ways so I don't start tearing up. And lastly, the date. It was August 19 when I moved, so every 19th of August that flew by each year, I'd be extremely moody, have many flashbacks, and most definitely be having meltdowns, I'd also feel in a sorta depressive state for quite a few days surrounding the 19th, so it would affect me greatly.
But in conclusion, this affects me so much. It made me cry to sleep so many times, triggered anxiety, stopped me from things I liked, and just punches me everyday. Ive even had thoughts of s3lf h@rm and wanting to d!e because of how much it wouldn't leave me alone. And I never have anyone to talk to because I probably seem too over dramatic. So to my younger self that said this, and I quote: "will this be like a super long vacation!? It sounds fun!! But ... I'm sure we'll come back, right?" Yes. It will be a very very long vacation, and it will be a painful one, but I'll make sure to still get through it, and finish it strong.
Numbers 2,4 & 5 apply to me.
I recall one instance a few years ago where my friends and I were at a bar hanging out. At some point in my field of vision a few tables away is this couple having an extremely emotional discussion. At some point the woman starts crying and I remember it completely derailed the conversation I was having with my friends as her emotional distress was causing my stomach to turn with unease, my heart rate increased and my mind went blank.
The couple left shortly after but it really put a damper on the evening
One trauma that still remains in my head over years ago is my dad leaving to another country for 'work', when he was actually cheating on my mum. He started this when i was born and the day my mum, sisters and i left the house, they divorced right in front of my eyes while i was packing my things. He was nearly arrested but was okay because my mum refused it. I still have to visit him every fortnight with my stepbrother in his house. Every time something reminds me of him i cant help but think of the negative things that happened in the past.
I love the narrate's voice it's so calming and gentle🥺❤️
After watching this, I realize through trauma therapy I have grown out of fear of conflict and fear of emotional outbursts.
Healing is possible!
2,4,5
Growing up with this made me confused of how am I supposed to feel or act towards people. Asking help was never an option when I needed it the most. Avoiding arguments, conflicts, fights gavr me advantages and disadvantages in life. When you get used it, it's hard to remove that part of you.
I still have trouble asking for help. Slowly learning to. Well. Not just asking for help, but expressing wants and needs. Still get tears in my eyes sometimes when I talk about my other dog Leroy. I loved him so much. We put him down October 15, 2020 at 12:27 pm. Still miss him a lot. Since then, I moved out November 1, 2022. Family has Loki the black lab. He’s a big goob, but I don’t see him much. Dad got him two days after Leroy’s passing. I get it. People grieve differently and he didn’t want to wait two weeks or longer again. Even my fiancé said that was too soon
This video popped up two days before the 27th anniversary of my dad's passing. He took his life when I was only five years old. While I would never wish tragedy on anyone, it does help a lot knowing I'm not alone in what I'm feeling.❤
+Psych2GoTv *Thanks for the list o' the triggers for trauma acknowledged and otherwise:*
0:35 *1. Sensations*
1:10 *2. Emotional others*
1:45 *3. Reactions to certain situations*
2:27 *4. Avoidance of assistance*
3:08 *5. Conflict-phobía:*
a. Apologizing
b. Agreeing
c. Accommodating
4:05 *6. Adverse social media*
5:06 *7. Time and anniversaries*
Well, this does explain why I can't handle it when people get really angry and why I tend to avoid conflicts or asking for help.
Thank you so much! It’s so hard to explain to people without having a video like this!
Thank you so much for the kind words! Which part of the video was relatable to you?
@@Psych2go hmm 🤔 so much but the 1-3 and number 7 the most affect me. I didn’t know about all these triggers. People told me I was “‘imagining it and
I’m not this helps me realize they were just gaslighting
2, 4 and 5 hit home. Not only do i suck at expressing any sort of strong emotions or unheard/unpopular opinions but also I've always shied away from asking for help. I always feel like i don't deserve any help unless i have sth to offer in return. I love giving. It makes me feel validated and also creates space for me to hope that when i need help i can safely ask them without feeling undeserving.
When i was younger i was really close to my grandparents on my 'dads' side but when they were suddenly ripped from my life due to drug abuse i used to cry myself to sleep every night missing them it was horrrible these memories haunt me to this day from realising just how messed up they were and i was oblivious to it this really helped me know what was happening to me back then thank you
I was visiting a friend last month and she accidentally did something that resembled one of my triggers. She hugged me for a solid 10 minutes and apologized for the rest of the night. I am so glad I found her.
I made a mistake ,and I have never missed someone more outside of family ever. Her messy divorce,going to ground once she found a safe place (which was my hope for her) as I knew from my experiences there was more and read the tell.
Miss her lots, still luv her to bits as her good side is beautiful, the dark side is terrifying. I just hope she finds the peace she is looking for.
I thank this channel in answering so many things on C-PTSD😢
These videos help me understand my trauma in a healthy way so that im able to overcome struggles these videos are amazing
Narcissistic parents, abuse, neglect, forced to make a personality as I was constantly told im a psychopath for not wanting to talk to my family even though when I do they acuse me of manipulation or say I'm wrong.. so I stopped.. Ironically, I speak 6 different languages and I have a loving girl who sees straight through my overly apologetic personality.. my point? That those who are abused have potential above most so long as they channel that pain and sadness into something more. I truly believe anyone is capable of anything. No matter the upbringing, it all comes down to will power, strength, and self awareness. Failure in life is always an option. However, giving up is not..
These videos are calming me down. I’ve gotten very worked up this evening over some family drama and I just wanted to thank you ❤
I've had a fun but bumpy childhood, so these things do come naturally. It kind of sucks, but it is what it is.
your voice in this video in so soothing. it is kind of comforting me at 4:36 am 🥺
Some songs , foods ,places and even time of year can bring back alot of different memories some good but others bad but with the help of this Chanel my councillor, friends and family I get the hard times ive also told my councillor about this Chanel in hopes it will help her other clients as well 🥰
Turning on notifications is one of the smartest decisions I ever made. Always ready for these videos!
Welcome aboard!
I had experienced _"the incident"_ as I called it, when i was 10.
and just now i heard something like a police siren, this immediately caused me to have a remembrance of this, which caused this thump in my chest. ( i usually feel this when I'm having emotional break downs or about to have one. )
I grabbed my doll and hugged it until i felt safe. It was the only thing that maded me comfortable. Elly was the only thing i had to keep me safe. I'm glad i had him. He is the only thing that makes me feel appreciated without leaving me.
Elly, the elephant doll with tiny frozen pjs, my doll i had since i was a baby, is my emotional doll.
I'm 54 and 2 months into Therapy after being victimized by my conniving and vindictive mother and the realization that she's a narcissist. I'm coming to grips with the fact that I have childhood trauma that has affected my entire being, I constantly apologize for everything and anything, and I always put other people and their needs ahead of my own even when I know it's going to disrupt my life and I don't let the person know but in the rare occasions when I do they don't seem to care so I end up putting them before me because I feel their needs are more important than my own.
I hate confrontation and if someone is angry and yelling it doesn't have to be towards me it still scares the shit out of me especially if it's someone with some type of authority.
Oh wow, anniversaries? Talk about hitting home! Last year, it was 40 years ago (Winter/Spring) that I was classmates with the first boy my heart had ever truly gone out to. One small act of kindness had set the tone permanently, so even after I had gotten carried away and lost any chance to have his friendship, my heart beat just for him no matter how he treated me. I was the unpopular one to begin with, and the one always being teased and verbally degraded by others. He joined in and it hurt, but negative attention was still better than none. I acted out, figuring I had nothing to lose anyway. I left that school, wearing the proverbial scarlet letter. (didn’t help that I was catching a lot of grief at home, as well)
Was I _triggered_ by the realization of 40 years past, per se? I guess it just depends on how you define it. I didn't have any panic attacks, but old feelings came back and (on my own time) I've had a few emotional moments. I'm still praying to God that He places us on the same path once again, and that I may have a chance to reconcile with him.
Thankfully, that "scarlet letter" fades over time, as I managed to patch things up with the one female classmate who was very kind to me, and when I had the audacity to reach out to one of the most prominent school bullies upon seeing his name in MySpace, he had apologized for how he had treated me and told of some of his trials since then. I've never been one for grudges, so I was just glad that we were able to make peace. Besides, of the people that take an express effort to forgive, none of them are classmates.
Hi this is helpful but can you do more ADHD ones?
Having experienced a lot of neglect due to a disabled sibling and a male centered household where my stepdad and younger brothers, one disabled and one not, were the main focus, I have the overwhelming desire to comfort people. When I see someone is really upset it's ahrd not to jump right in and comfort them, whether they want it or not. I never really got comforted so really good hugs from my partners can sometimes make me suddenly emotional.
Also I have a lot of trouble asking for help. I spent almost a year not telling my partners how much i was struggling the year after I lost a beloved uncle. It also felt like no one ever did anything to help me when i was dealing with the neglect. They'd take me places and do things but I the emotional support I needed, was never given.
Hey, could you please do a video on what to do if you have a depressed family member?
I've never identified me so much on a single video,thank you,now I know how I am...the way I am
I have some of everything mentioned.
Yelling or a trigger word would make me cowar and apologize (which I do alot) and in rare instances I would snap back but only when I'm stressed or under pressure.
Being left behind is another trigger that I have. I use to cry and get upset "now" (ever since high school) I am watching out for people I am with, example: classmate if on a school trip or family if with family (du) and I know that ok, we're still good. If I get separated I usually find someone and stick with them until we find everyone.
I noticed that when a co-worker is mad or nothing is in her favor abs she's getting frustrated. I feel my body tense, curl up. I feel scared. I go quiet (I mean I'm naturally a quiet person) , preferring to work as far away as I could trying to stay out of her way. Otherwise we're chill and I respect her being the oldest and most knowledgeable of the work place.
Another example, is my manager bringing the whole "we're a family" thing it made me uncomfortable and almost pushed me away. For Christmas, she gave me stain- glass flowers that represented everyone in the department I work in. I mean they're beautiful and I love them... but the sentiment behind it made me uncomfortable. Maybe it was because I knew the trick she was trying to pull by videos or other work places showing kindness to brainwash then flipping and getting annoyed over time and I don't want that to happen again because that was the worst three years working waitress/ dishwasher and working that job made me feel like I was working to slow at my job which shows in this job doesn't help that I think I have anxiety because I drill myself when I do anything wrong and my mind will remember.
Great insights! Childhood trauma can manifest in unexpected ways. Awareness is key to breaking the cycle and finding peace. 🌟💖
I was mentally abused by my narcissist mother when i was 4 up until i was 12 after my mother died. I am 27 now and being an adult is so hard for me because of my childhood and being in an abusive relationship for so long which lasted from when i was 17 to 25. The guy i dated never loved me and he was so mean to me behind my back and was a very controlling guy. The relationship ended finally after so long and now i am happy with my new partner, but my past oftten triggers painful memories for me and i have no way of coping. It hurts me so bad to have been lied to, believing that my mother was a loving caring individual but in actuality she was mean and abusive to me. I was lied to my whole life which finding out the truth is so painful to take. I was brain washed by my mother, she acted nice but also mean as well which comfused the young me so much, but now as an adult i figured her out that she was nothing but a fake and selfish person.
Being with people who are emotional, avoiding conflict, and not asking for help are my battles. I try to do better and it’s hard. Y’all pray for me
Nice video I'm 16 and totally disconnected with my family, I have few friends to talk to somewhat lonely, No one believes in me and i Dream to become successful and wealthy once I'm 18 and move out I'll burn down the past forever and pursue my future dream
Same
I think I have been ignored in my childhood so now to deal with its trauma I ignore people first and they think that i am egoist 🙂
Geez, the second one hit hard. I didn't really question why I often retreated into a shell or else felt panicked whenever someone got really angry or upset. I always felt really guilty afterwards for not doing anything to help them, even though I knew I should, I didn't understand why I kept panicking whenever someone had an emotional breakdown. But it makes a lot more sense now, ty!
I love these videos! 😊❤
I'm so glad! What is your favorite video from our channel?
@@Psych2go any with your voice in ;)
Just so you know i wach these videos every day and thay help me so much in my pathetic life this gives me so much comfort and confidence i just wanted to say a big thank you to psych2go for being like a personal therapist for me in ruff times so i just wanna say thank you so SO much ❤😊
I've burst into tears before because of teachers(specifically make so far) yelling at me. I then try to hide it as my dad would always yell at me becAuse of the fact that I would cry.
A lot of people nowadays have zero tolerance and don't care for others' past truamas... it's sad but the usual especially in the USA.
Therapy isn't always the answer to everything either is medicine for traumas that happened at a very tender age of early development.
So much pain. Wish we could all let it go and be happy.
My family doesn't allow me to go to therapy :/ my mom said "pray it will help u" and my dad say "no u're fine u're not crazy" yes my dad thinks depression means someone lost their brain or crazy
Number 2 is a big one for me! I was not allowed to feel sad/weak to cry to feel depressed. So whenever my wife is feeling this way I don’t knw what to say or do. On the inside I wanna say suck it up because that’s what I always heard. 😢😢
No no, you as a MAN has to suck it up. Let your wife cry and support her, she is a woman and she can't help it. You have to suppress your emotions and be strong.
I’ve been yelled at so much that someone raising their voice sends me into a panic (crying, panic attacks, etc.) is that normal?
For someone it is for others it is not, it depends on you honestly, but i think it's pretty normal to feel altered when someone is mad/yells at you.
I have taken on the mentality for myself that showing emotion is a weakness. I only hold my self to this. When my friends have a breakdown, I rush to help even though I feel terrible.
It's astounding how much I relate to these. I remember always avoiding conflict or people who are yelling because of my trauma. Especially when the parents yelling turns into getting hit with a belt 10 times, getting threatened to be tied up or thrown in a sack, getting thrown in a garbage can, etc.
:(
My mom once told me my dad left us when I was 4 years old, at 17. And because of that, I feel like if I got into a relationship with a man, I'm afraid that he would leave me for good and never apologize or look back, just like my dad never did. That's why I prefer to be friends with men instead of more. Because you get hurt a lot less when you're friends only with a man.
I realised recently that a certain coworker last year reminded me a lot of my childhood bullies and people I struggled with. Pretty sure he triggered me a lot.
after finishing the video, I fit 4 of these.
Something I never thought would hit close to home was two and three, when I was in sophomore year almost everyone was yelling. I didn't notice how obvious I was visibly uncomfortable, my teacher did. She asked if I was ok, I told her I was the noise was bothering me. Thankfully she made everyone quiet down, as a kid yelling was common at home. As for three I used to get really uncomfortable around any adult, mainly because I thought they would verbally abuse me. I managed to get along with my new at the time teachers because they were very understanding
I'm so sorry my parents mentally abused me and gaslighted me that's why I felt so bad about myselve.
The fact is that the last one is a big one as well as not asking for help and avoiding conflict, because my parents argued a lot when i was a kid and, with fathers day tomorrow I can't really spend father's day since my dad is gone since 2018 and I say sorry and blame myself because of all that happened in my life
Wow. I never really considered the fact that I can’t ask for help was caused by my ptsd, thank you for helping me realize this
⚠️ trauma dump ⚠️
When I was a kid I wanted to solve my families problems and fix my siblings relationships with each other. It was a lot of responsibility and I took it all upon myself. I think I felt like if I did that I would be more worthy of love. As the oldest of four I rarely got much attention from my parents. My three younger siblings were all very controlling and if things didn’t go their way they would get angry and fight. They would have heated arguments over a goddamn piece of paper. For whatever reason I’ve always felt a lot different from them. Even when I was a little kid I was more likely to give in than cause a fight. This became a problem because I was often ignored. Maybe I hoped that if I got my siblings to stop fighting all the time I would be able to get the things I wanted every now and then instead of constantly being pushed aside because I wasn’t problematic
Whatever the case, I was constantly trying to get my siblings to get along. I would try to step in and mediate their fights. Sometimes my parents would be angry with me for parenting them, saying I wasn’t in a position to do that. Other times they would get angry when I left during a fight because they wanted my help.
I wanted my siblings to stop fighting so bad. I tried so hard for so long to make sure everyone was happy at all times. We were all homeschooled and the time so I was always at home with them pretty much. If we went somewhere we all went. I did enjoy playing with them and stuff. I have fond memories of those days. But constantly being on edge trying to make sure nothing would make my siblings angry was really draining. The more I did the more my parents expected me to do because it just became the norm.
Their fighting upset me a lot. It really hurt me to hear two people I loved saying such god awful things to each other and not only yelling but screaming at the top of their lungs. I learned to self isolate and hide myself in my room it the bathroom because it got to the point where I just couldn’t handle it emotionally. I also adopted toxic positivity as a coping mechanism, probably because it was a counter to all the anger around me. I was hurt a lot by other’s negative emotions so I wanted to rid them both from myself and from others. I wasn’t very self aware at the time (while I am EXTREMELY self aware now) and I think it’s because I didn’t allow myself to think or feel certain things.
As I got older I had more school to do and was able to use that as an excuse to escape my siblings and isolate myself. I focused really hard on being successful with school in high school. Summers were really difficult for me because I didn’t have that escape.
I was so burnt out between my family and school that I had a breakdown during my senior year of high school. I thought it was just senioritis but I had another breakdown during the summer. I went on a family vacation and my dad got really mad at me and yelled at me and even spanked me once while we were there. I was 18. He had no right to do that. Mom said they were thinking of taking my car away because I couldn’t pay for it myself. She said dad was saying I was acting entitled but she knew I was struggling. Thanks for telling me that and yet doing absolutely nothing to help my situation mom. Sometimes I felt like I was the only one that actually cares to solve any of the damn family problems.
I started going to college and still was burnt out as hell. I don’t spend nearly as much time with my siblings anymore because I literally don’t have the emotional energy to deal with their crap. I had another breakdown that spring, although it was of a different nature. I’d been struggling with identity for a while since I gave up my identity as a child to expend all my efforts to help my family. I started to question everything and just had a terrible breakdown. I felt like I had wasted my entire life. I practically killed myself trying to solve my families problems but I did absolutely nothing but dig myself into a hole. I was also so burnt out and unmotivated I couldn’t function. I failed my midterms because of that. Then I got back on my feet and studied really hard and was able to make up for the failed midterms.
This summer I spent a lot of time to myself just not doing anything trying to feel less burnt out. I’m so miserable and bored and lonely but I always self isolate. I didn’t even acknowledge my resume until recently. I always thought I had an amazing childhood because I kept comparing it to people who were abused or abandoned or had parents who fought all the time. My parents have a really good relationship. But it’s my siblings that fought all the time. I love my family. I know they didn’t mean what they did to me. And that’s why it took me so long to acknowledge what I had been through.
I’m happy to say I’m in a better place now. I’m not happy but I’m not forcing myself to act happy. I still self isolate but I’m trying my best to stop. It’s going to be difficult but I think I’m finally going the right direction
As someone who has been diagnosed with PTSD I have had experiences with all these symptoms. I was raised in a neglectful household. I'll keep it brief, but basically I had witnessed violence, drug abuse, and was not taken care of well for the first 10 years of my life (as of right now I am 17). Asking for help is a huge problem, especially in school, I've struggled with grades because of it. Also, I notably retained the explicit detail of how marijuana smells. Also certain things remind me of certain events.
Now though I live in a safe place, with people who I love, and I've gone through counseling, I've grown healthier and happier through the years. To whoever is still struggling, I encourage you to reach out and ask for help if you can. It's scary, but you can do it. :) ❤
Tbh sometimes I question whether my past should be considered trauma, but basically my family fought alot, but I wasn't involved in the fights, but I know they were bad. My family doesn't swear but when they fought they did. And I remember my brother getting hurt often during them, and sometimes my dad would storm out. At one point he tried to leave actually, and now that has given me abandonment issues, but it only happened like last year. Would this be considered trauma or no?
Also I'm glad you are better now, it's good to hear your not deeply affected ☺️
I have a few spots in town that makes me uneasy, one was a car crash, the hospital, my childhood home but that would be a lot of people as well, at the end of the year i get so depressed because my mother passed away close to the end and I can’t do Christmas anymore either, thx for letting me tell my story
this video was posted right after my grandfather died... (may he rest in piece) also... i can't help but love this art style
This is me to a tea.. so helpful to have understanding of our personality behaviours
the third one was so relatable because one of my favorite musicians looks exactly like someone linked to trauma
When I come across conflicts I tend to ether avoid or go overboard due to family being abusive, I also hate showing my true emotions and getting emotional due to only one family member really keeping me safe emotionally, not to mention others in this. I might need therapy.😅
Number 5 is really me i always help ppl even though im having trouble with my own problems and the reason is to avoid having conflict with the person
****trigger warning: animal unwellness
0:45 so this is so eerie; I'm a veterinary technician and literally yesterday had a really bad situation with a pitty mama that had a huge open wound/ruptured mass on her belly and she was so dirty and smelled like my childhood home (hoarding, BO, and overall ick) BUT OF COURSE SHE WAS SO SWEET 😭 and I swore I was just being sensitive 😢 but nope. Thanks Psych 🥺
When I watched the one about how some avoid help because they feel helpless and worthless, it reminded me of how my grandmother always said I was helpless and couldn't do anything by myself. I was 7 years old at the time and didn't understand, now I suffer from a lot of different problems and no one except my friends knows about it.
I enjoy watching your informative videos. 😊 Keep on uploading more informative videos. 👍
Your voice sounds really calming.
When I was about 12 years old I was watching a movie on lifetime about the mind forgetting trauma and while I was watching that movie a childhood molestation that happened to me was brought back to my memory that I had completely forgot for years I questioned if it was a dream until the person who did it told someone I knew what they had done to me and they told me and then I know for sure that it wasn't a dream. After that the memories started becoming really clear to me to the point where I remember every single little detail where it happened and everything.
#2 hits hard. Talking with most people in casual setting is unpleasant, and even moderately emotional moments are unbearable to the point that i can't act normal and get in trouble. Also main reason why i prefer reading to watching movies.
1:14
I was in like 4th grade when this kid started yelling at the person across from him and I burst into tears and I didn't know why.
_That explains a lot..._
Hello
Edit: this is the first time a big youtube channel has hearted and replied to my comment, thank you!
Hello!
My dad was emotionally absent during my childhood and i only got to see him for a few minutes in the morning and to say goodnight. Because of this i get triggered when i hear this one song from Mozart Baby, about the dad bull that leaves the baby cow alone, i still cry whenever i hear it to this day.
I always use music to process my emotions. Sometimes, when I'm feeling vulnerable, I need to avoid certain genres, while some other times I NEED to do the opposite to confront certain feelings. Even if listening to a song causes me to cry, it's one of the few ways I can finally acknowledge my emotions and start to move on. Sometimes it happens with positive amotions that make me hyperfocus on things too much, too. Music helps me get mentally unstuck so much...
Auugggh the avoiding conflict is heavily… relatable. I am a person who always avoids conflict in as many ways as I can.
When I would break down as a child I'm front of my mom, she would stop would she was doing to hold me and I learned how to dry away other people's tears because she would do it for me and she always encouraged me to speak my mind in her words so my thoughts wouldn't eat me alive according to her and it helped so much 🙏🏾💓. I lovey mom, she gave me thee emotional support no one else gave her growing up as a kid but she said she felt loved
My mom went to therapy with me and she's still going
She inspired me to go to therapy to get help z when I'm too afraid to ask the people around with my internal struggles
She allowed herself to crack open and fall apart in front of me, 💞 so I took the example and became extremely honest about myself as I grew up just like she did
I'm so happy my mom was with me to healy childhood trauma and she decided to also heal hers. She had to teach me only evil people want to see you hurt
I've started therapy, it's too early to judge but, it's actually talking and they told me that each of us holds the key to their own healing inside them somewhere, hope it's going to work...
Watching this video, I realized I experience these signs everyday cuz I've been Emotionally and Verbally Abused by my dad, it is really uncomfortable dealing with the trauma.
This whole video just put the things that I couldnt explain into words. There was a certain deodarant that my uncle used to wear (he was the main cause of my trauma) and my aunt's new boyfriend wore it once, and my memories came flooding in before I could process what the smell even was. I get memories when people shout, even if it isn't directed at me. I'm now in secondary school, so there will be a lot more shouting, so therefore I feel stressed and anxious more as well. When we drive past an area that looks familiar, memories come back. I avoid help wherever I can so that they don't think I'm weak or pathetic, since that was what i was called when i needed it. I absolutely *will not* engage with conflict, as I get scared and anxious at the person that is conflicting with me. Some beauty videos or people with makeup and showy clothing on social media makes me more prone to intrusive and su!c!dal thoughts, and being reminded that I'm a failure, since I'm not like normal girls, or just normal people in general. I don't like makeup, i don't like dressing up, and i don't interact with people so i only have one good friend. All of my relationships have ended because my exes think I'm too introverted, or they've just made excuses, saying that they wanna focus on schoolwork or they are trying to protect me from their friends, only to get another girlfriend literally a week later (no exaggeration) and one even cheated on me. I feel like I need a boyfriend so then I feel good about myself since I have someone that I "know" truly loves me. My aunt and uncle's birthdays have just passed, and seeing the date on that day made me upset and angry. My reaction to trauma is mainly anger, so i just go silent and try to hold it in. People also dont listen to me at all, and since I'm in foster care and have just gotten out of my traumatic situation, the biggest thing I need right now is someone that listens to me. My social workers don't listen to me, my siblings find it awkward when I try to start this type of conversation, and I'm scared to tell people in my class, and my friend, because I dont want them to dislike me. I'm getting an advocate - basically someone that will listen to what you have to say and voice them - and i couldn't be happier. I'm working on my insecurities, anxiety and social anxiety, and I have a thing that I'm starting to do where I move around a lot when I'm stressed or upset, and I'm working on that. Hopefully I'll get there :) And I've just realised how long this is 😬 Thanks if you read this whole thing, at least someone cares about what i have to say, that makes me feel good 😊
Much of my childhood was filled with constant reminders that i wasn't good enough.. that it was stupid to cry, and leaving difficult situations was 'running away'.. as a child I had doubts about a certain family member, and struggled speaking my thoughts with others, other then on paper. A family member would often find those notes first, and yell at me about them. Whenever I didn't do a good enough job on chores, they'd get mad at me and make me redo them. I ran away from home twice because I couldn't handle it all, amd that same family member used that information against me. I used to get panic attacks whenever I heard a male adult yell at or fight with someone else, and I'm afraid of making others mad because of my childhood. My mother never really realized anything bad was happening to me, and since I was her first child I doubt she really knew how this family member's words affected me. I usually try to stop myself from crying, or hide away from others and cover my mouth to stop the noise. I dislike crying infront of others, because it makes me feel like a burden. I even remember the family member telling my mother that they felt like I was in the way of their relationship. My own mother doesn't even remember that, yet that day is engraved into my memory..
I've never liked people yelling since it has reminded me of my dad's temper. He's better with it now and I have gotten counciling for my PTSD, stress, and anxiety, but I still can't handle people yelling since I go completely quiet as I curl up in a ball for hours on end, a defense mechanism I've had since I was a kid because I was always afraid of making people upset.
i really relate to no, 1 and 4 bc i had a certain situation that i wish not to disclose that involved a certain sound and it traumatized me... and for no. 4 its bc when i was younger my mom, if i broke smth or lost smth she wouldnt be like "its fine i'll help you look" or "its okay we all make mistakes" she would just get angry and say that i dont take care of my stuff and it rlly hurt me a lot
and also number 6 bc i watch a lot of true crime and see a lot of things abt death and it really scares me bc it reminds me that im going to lose ppl who are special to me and that im gonna lose smth special of mine aka my life
Memories from my childhood, results in trauma, where there's this thought on how was it possible that I made it out. I still have from the past, I'm still very cautious about what I do in my life, now that I'm an adult. Most of the trauma is from how people treated me, because it seemed like they saw something about me, that I acknowledged as something that wasn't anything new in my life. It was stressful, painful and awkward in my childhood.
Thank you, i really needed this tonight
what a nice clear voice you have. I don't think you need subtitles :)
Your videos help me so much!!! Thank You!