4 Ways to Heal From Your Past (Traumatic Memories Part 2)

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 15 พ.ค. 2024
  • Here’s the thing about trauma: even though the event happened in the past, we work with trauma in the present moment. It causes pain in the present moment, it changes your nervous system in the present moment. The hurt isn’t just “in the past” it’s right here, in your body and emotions right now. In the last video we talked about 4 ways traumatic memories differ from regular memories. In this video we’ll cover 4 ways you can work with those memories in the present moment so they don’t bother you so much.
    When traumatic memories are integrated and consolidated, real healing can happen. This might look like someone being able to say “This terrible thing happened, but right now, I am safe”. And when they remember the event, they can calm their mind and body in the present moment. The memory becomes a memory instead of a flashback where they re-experience a terrible event as if it’s happening again.
    As we talked about in the last video traumatic memories differ from regular memories in 4 ways:
    They don’t naturally soften over time, they stay intense and vivid
    Traumatic memories are often sensory- it FEELS like the event in sights, sounds, smells.
    The passage of time is distorted-it feels like you’re living it over again in the present
    They are often fragmented, they don’t follow a sequential order, some information may be missing or blocked
    Looking for affordable online therapy? My sponsor, BetterHelp, connects you to a licensed professional from the comfort of your own home. Try it now for 10% off your first month: betterhelp.com/therapyinanuts...
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    Check out my favorite self-help books: kit.co/TherapyinaNutshell/bes...
    Check out my podcast, Therapy in a Nutshell: tinpodcast.podbean.com/
    Therapy in a Nutshell and the information provided by Emma McAdam are solely intended for informational and entertainment purposes and are not a substitute for advice, diagnosis, or treatment regarding medical or mental health conditions. Although Emma McAdam is a licensed marriage and family therapist, the views expressed on this site or any related content should not be taken for medical or psychiatric advice. Always consult your physician before making any decisions related to your physical or mental health.
    In therapy I use a combination of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Systems Theory, positive psychology, and a bio-psycho-social approach to treating mental illness and other challenges we all face in life. The ideas from my videos are frequently adapted from multiple sources. Many of them come from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, especially the work of Steven Hayes, Jason Luoma, and Russ Harris. The sections on stress and the mind-body connection derive from the work of Stephen Porges (the Polyvagal theory), Peter Levine (Somatic Experiencing) Francine Shapiro (EMDR), and Bessel Van Der Kolk. I also rely heavily on the work of the Arbinger institute for my overall understanding of our ability to choose our life's direction.
    And deeper than all of that, the Gospel of Jesus Christ orients my personal worldview and sense of security, peace, hope, and love www.churchofjesuschrist.org/c...
    If you are in crisis, please contact the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ or 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or your local emergency services.
    Copyright Therapy in a Nutshell, LLC

ความคิดเห็น • 341

  • @pardisarjmandi8889
    @pardisarjmandi8889 ปีที่แล้ว +402

    What hurts me most about my past trauma is how I’m scared that people find out I have these issues or triggers and look down on me so I never share with anyone

    • @nisarosli
      @nisarosli ปีที่แล้ว +35

      Yes I totally can relate to that. It's important to open up to the right person who makes you feel safe and is non-judgemental and accepts you for who you are. I hope one day you'll find that person 🧡

    • @dod608
      @dod608 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@nisarosli thats makes you even stronger, trust that the universe will attract the compassionate people to you to share with, and feel safe among

    • @tonynewman597
      @tonynewman597 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Hi Pardis,
      I can relate. I used to be the same way when I was younger. I hope and pray you will find someone you feel comfortable with.
      The 1st time I did EMDR, I physically felt a lot better. It was the 1st time I realized our body has a physical memory.
      Due to circumstances beyond my control, unfortunately throughout I the years, I did not get the professional help I needed & the PTSD turned into Non-Epileptic Seizures, which at times is not only mentally, but physically exhausting. By doing extensive research, to include throughout the years of extensive therapy, I am doing a lot better. I hope and pray you seek the help you need.

    • @tinag7506
      @tinag7506 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      This is very true. Some people don't understand what I'm going through and why I react the way I do. There hasn't been many people who empathised with me effectively.

    • @Jerome_111
      @Jerome_111 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I used to feel that because I had toxic relationships. It’s very important finding good and safe people so that you can be vulnerable with!

  • @Yasminehappylife
    @Yasminehappylife 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +31

    There’s so much shame and guilt I have holding on . So much hurt from others in my young teenage years , physical and emotional abusive bf at age 14 . Rape at 14 . So much hit at a young age . So now I’m so emotionally damaged and sensitive , insecure and just not the same . It’s like I was sucked away .

    • @aayushdubey8432
      @aayushdubey8432 12 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      We are there for you . Don't worry sis , everything will be alright

    • @brianhanes5413
      @brianhanes5413 10 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Wasn't your fault, idc what anyone says

  • @ivankovwink1311
    @ivankovwink1311 ปีที่แล้ว +47

    I just spent the last night crying over some traumatic events in my past and couldn't sleep until 6 am no matter how much I tossed and turned on the bed. Glad that this video showed up in my recs :)

    • @privateperson4842
      @privateperson4842 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Wishing you peace of mind🩵. Marisa Peer has some healing utubes (too), and the crappy childhood fairy..

  • @sadistickitten
    @sadistickitten ปีที่แล้ว +176

    I've been writing a blog about my traumatic experiences as a kid. It's been very therapeutic for me. No one actually reads it but getting my story out there into works has helped me to get over those bad memories & move on from it.

    • @JordanHunter333
      @JordanHunter333 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      What a brilliant idea! It strikes me as so much more tangible and healing to be writing for "listeners/readers", than for just myself in a journal. As you say, even if no one else ever reads it, it truly seems to change the energy of it. Thank you!

    • @sadistickitten
      @sadistickitten ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@JordanHunter333 I've posted links for my friends to read it but they haven't & i get it, it's not exactly fun content. It's sad depressing stuff but for me, it feels good to purge those memories like they're free of me now & into the world

    • @JordanHunter333
      @JordanHunter333 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@sadistickitten Yes, free of you, and out where they can be transmuted back to Light...my image and prayer when releasing the pain or darkness of the past. Blessings to you. 🙏

    • @sadistickitten
      @sadistickitten ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@JordanHunter333 exactly, healthy purging of darkness. You too & ty

    • @JordanHunter333
      @JordanHunter333 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@sadistickitten ❤🙏

  • @saracrum1487
    @saracrum1487 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    I struggle with healing from my past as a drug addict. The things I did the people I was with the situations I put myself in… they weren’t me. When I have flashbacks I instantly pray Jesus will forgive me and it helps. But wow therapy is amazing. Thank you for this video

    • @dod608
      @dod608 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      our memories are not us, each period we are different unrelated persons and the only influence memory can do to us is push us be better and better

  • @jmdiaz8651
    @jmdiaz8651 ปีที่แล้ว +47

    I thought I was over those traumas but as I revisit the place and meet the old people, the fear, shame and pain are still there as they stare at me with disapproval. That is why I thought I need videos like this right now. Thanks so much!

    • @fatimamushtaq7839
      @fatimamushtaq7839 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I thought the same...but we need to do smth about it...and finally I'm here...

  • @brittneygilchrist2744
    @brittneygilchrist2744 ปีที่แล้ว +56

    My partner and I re-write my memories by creating new experiences to replace the trigger so they don’t bother me anymore. I’m fortunate that he has stayed committed to this form of relief-therapy.. he makes the absolute best replacement ones with me!

    • @DiscordBeing
      @DiscordBeing ปีที่แล้ว +8

      What a GREAT idea. Thank you.

    • @beautifullifestyle1331
      @beautifullifestyle1331 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      How you re write and replace triggers?

    • @marjamerryflower
      @marjamerryflower ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Would you be able to give us an example? That would be helpful

    • @tammiegrayson3413
      @tammiegrayson3413 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      How does that work exactly?

    • @brittneygilchrist2744
      @brittneygilchrist2744 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@marjamerryflower I actually have a perfect example as I’m in the process of re-writing one right now.
      I have severe trauma surrounding an abusive ex.. There was a Halloween in which I dressed up as Alice in Wonderland and he dressed up as the Mad Hatter. An incident happened that night so I have utterly despised Alice, the Mad Hatter and everything Wonderland related ever since. I would have bad body-charged reactions that could last for days.. even though Alice in Wonderland should be right up my alley as I love colours, cat’s and slight insanities, I loved it as a child and young adult, but it has bagged and bothered me for over a decade now.
      One of my close girlfriends, of whom I love, adore and trust had said something about “being as mad as a hatter”, I felt that twinge but instead of getting frustrated with it, I thought of how I could heal that trigger.
      SO.. now to replace that trigger, my gf, my partner and I are going to do a cosplay photoshoot where I’m Alice, my partner is dressing up as the Mad Hatter and my gf, who has a Cheshire Cat tattoo and who’s nickname is Alyss, will be the Cheshire Cat.
      Oh! And for triggers surrounding places, my partner would plan up fun adventures for us to have together near the areas when we first started dating.. it was the kick-start to this method.
      It really sucks when you initially get hit with the trigger, you need to build a habit of searching for a solution to solve the trigger instead of getting lost in it. Even 8 years later it can still be a challenge, but the pay-off of smiling at a former trigger is such an immense fulfillment that it makes every ounce of effort worth it.
      I hope you find your peace of mind and I wish you all of the best in life. 💕

  • @GodHelpMe369
    @GodHelpMe369 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

    I desperately want to die.
    I notice, in my life,
    all I do is navigate my way through the world...
    Doing my best, moment-to-moment,
    to endure the least amount of suffering as possible...
    And I keep doing that every day, just waiting to die.
    There's no joy, no hope, no happiness in my life.
    It's just pain and trauma and survival and misery.
    I live in poverty. I am ashamed of my life.
    I have severe (c)PTSD.
    My heart is shattered.
    Rage and grief consume every cell of my being.
    I pray to heal from,
    and be released from,
    the prison of:
    - poverty
    - aches and pains
    - an inflexible mind and body
    - diabetes
    - PTSD flashbacks
    - (c)PTSD
    - suicidal depression
    - homicidal rage
    - grief
    - guilt
    - regret
    - loneliness
    - heartache/heartbreak
    - repression/suppression
    - soul rape
    - a silenced voice
    - a lack of boundaries
    - perpetual aloneness
    - obesity
    - trauma
    - obsession/rumination
    - the past
    - spiritual attacks and curses
    I MUST DO MY BEST TO REMEMBER:
    When I am feeling/being victimized,
    I am over-valuating what I don't have,
    and under-valuating what I do have! 😊

    • @aurinkoinen1134
      @aurinkoinen1134 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      God bless you in Jesus name. Please do not give up, God loves you and He has a plan for your life. It is possible to heal and help others after you have gone through the difficul times. ❤️🙏

    • @AR-qk2ih
      @AR-qk2ih หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Bro be grateful you will feel better you wrote all the negative things now write all the positive things you have and read them every day, don’t ever give up once you get to old age you can look back at yourself and be proud that you went through all the pain:)

    • @AR-qk2ih
      @AR-qk2ih หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Try going gym for 1 month serious and see the difference you will find a purpose and get more closer to God

  • @deborahjohnston5425
    @deborahjohnston5425 ปีที่แล้ว +164

    You are so intelligent and amazing with the help you give. I gain something with every video I watch. You are very calming and make me feel like there is always hope. Thank you so much for your help and sharing with all of us. Life is so fragile and in this day so stressful. I look forward to listening to your programs. I am 74 and have had bad health and lost my husband 2 years and 4 months ago. There has been so much change in my life and a lot of fear and loneliness. Our house was taken, I have trouble with food. I have 9 children.

    • @wendythorne25
      @wendythorne25 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      I am also 74 and have health problems and it becomes very hard to deal with. If you need someone to communicate with let me know❤

    • @sandyavalos3305
      @sandyavalos3305 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Deborah, I hate that you are going through this. You are stronger than you think and I know that you can get through this.

    • @deborahjohnston5425
      @deborahjohnston5425 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@sandyavalos3305 Thank You so much

    • @belindatolley
      @belindatolley ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I will be praying for you Deborah 🙏 🤲
      Well said.... just love her so much.... such a blessing 🙌

    • @EC-yd9yv
      @EC-yd9yv 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      🌺🙏✨✨

  • @LisaMaryification
    @LisaMaryification ปีที่แล้ว +12

    When I was younger, before I understood anything about psychology and trauma, I would avoid places or things I now realise were associated with painful events. Just lately, I'm examining my dislike for certain things. Many are associated with events way back in early childhood. Thinking about the connection helps me heal and it doesn't seem so frightening.

  • @MultiSignlanguage
    @MultiSignlanguage ปีที่แล้ว +39

    This is so helpful. So clear and concise. I’m a Christian and have spent my whole life (I’m 52 now) struggling to understand what healing looks like. I don’t feel like the Christian teachings or community have a good understanding of it. It’s mostly denial and repression/suppression, and magical/wishful thinking. I kept praying forgiveness prayers and all kinds of prayers for healing but it never happened. I tried counseling off and on since I was a teen but never could stick with it for long. I feel like I wasted decades of my life struggling and numbing and running and avoiding. But that is what I learned from my parents, so the trauma is being passed from one generation to the next. I’m longing to see this changed. Thanks for sharing these videos that are so helpful 🦋

    • @saracrum1487
      @saracrum1487 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      The Lord helps, but he has also blessed others in science to help us even more. Jesus love you!

    • @malaysiacooper
      @malaysiacooper ปีที่แล้ว +3

      ​@@saracrum1487but if he loves us why he make us go through something more horrible than others I don't understand like I've tried but I can't help but too question I've done the same thing as the lady above and nothing has helped not even god helped me only when it was almost tooonlate

    • @privateperson4842
      @privateperson4842 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Hope you can find a counselor/psychologist to help you heal. I've been to the edge of losing hope and am ever grateful to have been given extra decades to enjoy waterfalls, dogs, music, sunsets, golden moments with friends & family... With life there are options. Take care of you🧡

    • @privateperson4842
      @privateperson4842 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      When I stopped believing in God, I didn't have the questions, expectations or frustrations of the 'why's. But each has to find the path the best works for them. 💞

    • @eg-draw
      @eg-draw 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      That's great! It's such a rare to see someone actually could get away from those nasty sects! I hope you will find peace and good therapist

  • @alpacino4204
    @alpacino4204 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    I have so many traumas and I don't have money to go to therapy
    I will try do it my own 😊

  • @victoriarector1419
    @victoriarector1419 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

    this was such a helpful video, i didn’t really understand what ‘processing’ ever meant. but now i see that it’s your brains ability to store once traumatic memories in a more comfortable way. thank you so much

  • @vulnikkura
    @vulnikkura ปีที่แล้ว +7

    You are so wonderful! I've been in therapy for 2 years now and your videos are such a nice "addition" to my talk therapy. Thank you so much! ❤

  • @seinfeldfan442
    @seinfeldfan442 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The flashbacks bring it back for sure, take good care of yourself when it happens

  • @elyaequestus1409
    @elyaequestus1409 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Thank you very much for the work!
    I am really happy to discover that I am already doing these things under professional supervision and especially the somatic work has made a massive difference for me. These days I feel more relaxed and openminded which helped improve my relationships.
    Getting the word out there and especially learning to pace when processing trauma is just so, so important. Thank you!

  • @antoninat1114
    @antoninat1114 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +16

    After going through a traumatic experience at past workplace, I now feel anxious ALL THE TIME. I hate it so much. I used to be so calm and confident in public, but everywhere I go now I feel like everyone’s watching me and judging me. Even though I’ve left my workplace, it’s like I’m re-living all the things that happened at work. Trauma is so scary! I’ve never felt this way before EVER and my mental health is so up and down :(

    • @annekerotterdam7499
      @annekerotterdam7499 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Same experience here, (two times) That's why gaslighting, and manipulation by narcissists are so traumatizing!

    • @JulietCrowson
      @JulietCrowson 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Praying helps a lot 🫂🕊️🙏

    • @Man-qq7jg
      @Man-qq7jg หลายเดือนก่อน

      I'm sorry

  • @andreabelen.
    @andreabelen. 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    It’s been exactly a year since my first ever manic episode that lasted two months (I live with Bipolar I) and I was told that I had PTSD. After that I started to be afraid of literally everything. I used to get stressed about every little thing and think that I wouldn’t find a way out. I couldn’t stop thinking of the mess that I had gone through (even though I didn’t feel like that during the episode), and being harsh to myself for my past actions, without realizing that it was just me experiencing symptoms.
    Now I go to therapy once a week, and to the psychiatrist once a month. My weekly activities include painting, baking, playing the drums and going to college (with less subjects).
    Little by little, I’m getting better and fighting my anxiety and my intrusive thoughts and memories.

  • @SimeonKirilovX
    @SimeonKirilovX ปีที่แล้ว +26

    EMDR helped me go through my traumas and healed PTSD. I recommend it alongside schema therapy

    • @giovannimaisano9194
      @giovannimaisano9194 ปีที่แล้ว

      What is Sheena therapy?

    • @aks1993kumar
      @aks1993kumar ปีที่แล้ว

      She said it doesn’t work for childhood traumas?

    • @llo8556
      @llo8556 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Do you mean somatic?

  • @shy_donut8307
    @shy_donut8307 ปีที่แล้ว +49

    I needed this rn. Last night my school club announced a student had died. I didn’t know them at all or what the person even looked like because I was new. There was 10+ people crying at the same time and one girl was violently sobbing. It was all too much and triggered feelings from when my uncle died in a car crash from a drunk driver in the 6th grade. It’s like all those feelings came back up as if it happened yesterday and I felt everything. The setting was the exact same. A bunch of family crying hard at the same time at the scene. I couldn’t help it and had to go in the hallway to sob with the other students. I felt like an awful person because the other students were crying over someone they knew but I was breaking down because of flashbacks I couldn’t help. It doesn’t help that within the last few years there’s been a lot deaths in my family too. All those feelings just came back full force.

    • @Chickaqee
      @Chickaqee ปีที่แล้ว +14

      thank you for sharing, trauma is no joke and you are not a bad person for something you had no control over. you're very strong and you can do this!

    • @dena6254
      @dena6254 ปีที่แล้ว

      💗🌸💗

    • @beachvacay3184
      @beachvacay3184 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Your feelings are valid, and you did nothing wrong. Please don’t worry about appearing selfish or whatever. Grief is hard on everyone, no matter who they lost or what triggers it.

    • @oumaimab979
      @oumaimab979 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      i had similar experience but in my grandfather's funeral i didn't cry because of he's death but because of deep feelings that got triggered inside me, if feels horrible.

    • @tonynewman597
      @tonynewman597 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hi Shy,
      Im so sorry for your loss & your family's loss. May they RIP.

  • @seinfeldfan442
    @seinfeldfan442 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Even if I can't relate to what emma is talking about I still enjoy the videos because she speaks so well. One of the best voices I have ever heard.

  • @fotinotita7022
    @fotinotita7022 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank you so very much. Your guidance and methods are invaluable. I’ve shared many of your TH-cam clips with my young and older clients for them to learn and understand what they’re experiencing. As a CranioSacral certified techniques therapist I do work with trauma. Even so, I learn so much from you. In gratitude 🙏🏻

  • @lilylammond8093
    @lilylammond8093 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you very much for all your videos. I feel like I always learn something new and useful that I take with me in my healing journey - such as your video on being an observer of your thoughts - and this video is another one to add to the list :) I hope you are aware of how appreciated and effective your work is. Sending lots of grateful, kind energy your way x

  • @ssutherland9019
    @ssutherland9019 ปีที่แล้ว

    These more recent videos are helping me to help others. I am so glad I found your channel.

  • @sharynm79
    @sharynm79 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Very helpful. The info is great and it’s even more meaningful with your calm reassurance that we will be able to get thru it. Thank you so much💗

  • @Mushroom321-
    @Mushroom321- ปีที่แล้ว

    THANK YOU!!, SO MUCH !! the video i didn't know i needed !!
    My new practice " , this happened ", " however im safe".

  • @aivelu2737
    @aivelu2737 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    You don’t know how much your content is very helpful for me, Thank you a lot 💜

  • @upstatenewyork
    @upstatenewyork ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Saying to turn to friends and family suggests that all friends are prepared to walk through the traumatic memory with you or that all family members are. Just because someone can be labeled a friend or family member, it does not mean those titles ensure that the person is capable of soothing you as you struggle with a memory. What makes a friend or family member any more “qualified” to see you through…and I mean really see you through a traumatic memory? Quite often friends and family are the source of our trauma. Instead of using the words friends and family to help you cope with traumatic memories, I would prefer you say to turn to people you can trust. Just like that. You see, not all friends can be trusted and not all family members can be trusted.

    • @kyamirin564
      @kyamirin564 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I agree, thank you for saying this.
      It's especially hard in an age where we can be reached 24/7 with phones etc.
      Of course you want to help someone close to you, but the feeling of having to be available all the time is so overwhelming, especially when you are struggling yourself.

  • @GinaGina-jl5io
    @GinaGina-jl5io ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Definitely a new subscriber. I cried watching Part 1 and 2. Thank you so much for your videos ❤❤❤

  • @angelawhite2022
    @angelawhite2022 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    So happy to have found your channel. You’re awesome and relatable. ❤❤❤ from Newfoundland

  • @sarahdoanpeace3623
    @sarahdoanpeace3623 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    One of the best most informative and helpful videos ever , thank you greatly, Emma!

  • @elviracardenalopez
    @elviracardenalopez ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I love your videos and all the knowledge that you share. Thank you very much!

  • @chasing_mentalclarity
    @chasing_mentalclarity 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    My past bad memories keep coming up in my mind and all those people who have hurt me in the past , i feel like they are just standing beside me and bullying me exactly as it happened in the past. This ruins my life. I can't enjoy my present and there are times I am just talking myself in a room as if I am taking with someone.

  • @BethanyJordanRose_
    @BethanyJordanRose_ 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I thought I was healed after my traumatic 7 year relationship I realized now that I’m with someone who loves me I am not and I want to do everything I can to heal my trauma. Thank you for this video

  • @MyDanymax
    @MyDanymax ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I love your calm voice. Thank you so much.

  • @danmilliken
    @danmilliken ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Your videos are such a gift; thank you.

  • @elclaudiosanchez
    @elclaudiosanchez 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    I was dating a psycotherapist girl, after 1 month of dating I told her my childhood traumas; she said "thats fucked up"

  • @beverley-annemackintosh3672
    @beverley-annemackintosh3672 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Thank you for being so generous with your knowledge and for caring ❤😊❤😊

  • @tahitihawaiiblue
    @tahitihawaiiblue ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank you for this video. It was well organized and encouraging.

  • @WandaWolf
    @WandaWolf ปีที่แล้ว +35

    Thank you for this. Keeping a diary has really helped me a lot going through the war (I'm from Ukraine). Writing out my thoughts and fears and sharing them with my friends and spouse seems like getting them out of my head, at least partially. And that helped make the most horrible memories less stressful. Helping others going back into their traumatic memory is another thing, I'm still not sure if I do it right, but I always try to state that I'm very happy the person survived and is now safe/safer.

    • @neildepressedtyson540
      @neildepressedtyson540 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      As an australlian watching, it really terrifies me the position you guys are in and I hope as many ukrainians are as okay as they can be. It's so unfair what is happening in Ukraine and trust me, the world is watching and empathising. I can't even begin to imagine the fear and horrible memories.

    • @WandaWolf
      @WandaWolf ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@neildepressedtyson540 thank you for your support! It's strange how the world becomes such a dangerous place full of pain and the things you'd never expect to see, hear or participate in your life... But at the same time you discover there's so much good in people ❤️ so many kind and empathetic hearts around

    • @neildepressedtyson540
      @neildepressedtyson540 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@WandaWolf As much as I empathise, it's made me become afraid of sitting still and made me wonder if I should take up arms training and self defence. I've always thought of Australia as being unlikely to be in a war, but I watch so many Ukrainian videos on the war and see so much killing and violence that it's made me think what if it happens to me? I don't know anything about how to shoot or fight or defend my family.

  • @judyny2293
    @judyny2293 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you! 🥰 you are doing amazing things for people😇

  • @gbecks3672
    @gbecks3672 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I’m 36 with a stable life now. I still find myself crying alone about my past. Mostly from child traumas I’ve been through. Which is a lot. I had a lot of teen and early 20 traumas but for someone reason those ones I don’t think of often. I don’t want meds I want to heal on my own.

  • @888alp
    @888alp ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I love all your videos. A gifted human being you are as a professional. ❤

  • @izawaniek2568
    @izawaniek2568 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you for your help and support.

  • @evasccl7846
    @evasccl7846 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank you! I have used journaling to begin with as I was going through a time forced to heal physically as a result of cumulus of different childhood traumatic experiences and realizing how they had impacted my adulthood and the choices i made- bad choices - was really very helpful to the point of restoring certain harmony within me.
    Then, as I managed to put words into it all, accept it, forgive my parents and others, forgive myself too... that is when all of a sudden found poetry writing the most heart, mind, soul felt expression of healing... it is like those floating lanterns, where you write these poems and them let them go.... I still have memories coming however, i say to myself it is in the past and overcame it all, which seems to stop triggering the emotions linked to the memory and I think that is my biggest improvement and now that i am aware, I know what to do when such similar instances happen, I don't let the emotion grab me but look at it from a bird's perspective and use my logic with the dose of empathy that is required without it overtaking me!
    I love your videos and find them helpful, often they say what i did on my own without knowing, which made my healing harder in a way... but i don't know, I believe God lets things go in a particular way for a good reason, because He is good. I don't question HIm. I pray to learn from my experience, grow and be able to help others by sharing my experience.

    • @carolp1581
      @carolp1581 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Forgiving the abuser has helped me a lot. That person is now gone. But we were able to talk. They apologized again, and I readily forgave. Much healing in that.

    • @evasccl7846
      @evasccl7846 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@carolp1581 ❤️ thank you for sharing.

  • @bmeeseeks2881
    @bmeeseeks2881 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You have helped me so much you can t believe. I can t afford therapy so I watch you. Thank you!!xo

  • @tonynewman597
    @tonynewman597 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you for creating this video! I always learn something new from you. :)

  • @TorringtonFernandopulle
    @TorringtonFernandopulle ปีที่แล้ว

    Love your lessons and guidance ..... Very valuable and helpful ...... Thank you so much 🙏

  • @adorablecats9891
    @adorablecats9891 ปีที่แล้ว

    You give to us amazing, helpful information that is so very helpful. Thanks AGAIN Emma.

  • @rebecamarquez2607
    @rebecamarquez2607 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I have my youtube list dedicated to your videos. There are a great, thank so much for your kind and hard work. I would love to see a video about highly sensitive people and how to deal with anxiety & trauma is you're a hsp :) thank you. All my best regards.

  • @janicerennie422
    @janicerennie422 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Really good information. Thank you so much.

  • @chai__tea
    @chai__tea ปีที่แล้ว

    Your videos are a great resource!! Thanks

  • @DecoyDorisWP
    @DecoyDorisWP ปีที่แล้ว

    I love your voice. It helps so much. thank you

  • @starlightbarking9495
    @starlightbarking9495 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    My traumatic memories have never been sharp or intrusive that I can recall, my brain works very hard to block these out and dissociate from them so that I have a very hazy recall of the events or people involved. I do try and avoid being around the perpetrators of the trauma, their enablers and the places where it occured as this helps with moving on from it and keeps me safe from being re-traumatised. My brain does get a bit carried away with this and often dissociates from the entire time period when the trauma occured, and any events surrounding it. I can remember these if I try to but they are hazy and my mind does not naturally choose to dwell on them.

    • @kyamirin564
      @kyamirin564 ปีที่แล้ว

      The exact same thing for me, it's like our brain tries to delete those memories to protect us from suffering

    • @hannahsmith7095
      @hannahsmith7095 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      this is the best way i’ve ever heard to explain what it feels like to disassociate and be avoidant along with it. thank you

  • @elizabethjenkins6448
    @elizabethjenkins6448 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    much appreciation for validation blessings 🙏💜💫🙌🙌

  • @deekshanegi21
    @deekshanegi21 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Liked before watching ❤️

  • @caprimayham7016
    @caprimayham7016 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank God for this woman!

  • @phoebe2234
    @phoebe2234 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Hi Emma thank you for another helpful video I find your videos about catastrophizing particularly helpful, could you do a video about over worrying when your children are sick, thank you

  • @jamesjames1364
    @jamesjames1364 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You are the Best! The Crème de la Crème. The Cream of the Crop! Bravo!

  • @anitafrewen3049
    @anitafrewen3049 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thanks so much - very helpful

  • @shannonh2541
    @shannonh2541 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you Emma- thank you so very much!!!!

  • @johndenver5015
    @johndenver5015 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Thank you Emma . Up until right now I didn't think I was afraid. This may sound really strange but I just understood that I am afraid. I knew I had trust issues with everything. On a surface level I guess I understood. But now I realize trust and security basically mean the same. I don't think I really said it out loud that I am afraid and nothing seems secure in My life. I do feel better in some ways. I Lost faith in God family and myself. I have felt helpless and hopeless for very long time. People that know me has seen a huge change in me and not for the good.i just told My sister yesterday that other than her My wife and kids I don't want to see anyone else not even a picture of someone else. That's crazy right seeing that I just watched your video. I never identified that I was afraid.

    • @gnarthdarkanen7464
      @gnarthdarkanen7464 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I don't think it's all that crazy... We have a kind of expectation about what defines "fear" and how we expect "afraid" to feel. I think a LOT of people expect it to involve screaming and crying and running away or curling up in a fetal position and hiding under stuff like furniture or covers and pillows while we cry about what we can't do anything else about...
      In real life, however, we don't have the option of hiding under a couch when someone darts into traffic in front of us, and we're afraid of hitting them with a car or motorcycle... We're still afraid, but it gets expressed as we hide it behind aggression and shout and swear and act angrily at them for making a silly and relatively little mistake... BUT we're afraid.
      We're afraid when someone challenges us at a bar or in a restaurant over having a little too much to drink or demanding we keep our noisy electronics quieter on a bus, or whatever else they might challenge us about, BUT again, since we don't have the blankets or a nearby piece of furniture to hide under, the fear gets a mask of aggression... OR since we've been challenged in a certain place before, maybe we just avoid that place in general... and now we're still afraid, but it's not puddles of tears, blanket burritos, and fetal positions like we'd expected...
      While we're masking our fear behind aggression, we might even lie to ourselves and think we "feel malicious" or "mean"... BUT we're afraid, and we may not even know it or recognize it. SO no, it's not crazy to think you've never recognized it until now... It's only good that you've started uncovering that about it. It's good to see it for what it is, and maybe now, you can deal with it as it is "really" and find your way clear to heal and move on. ;o)

    • @johndenver5015
      @johndenver5015 ปีที่แล้ว

      Thank you for taking the time to comment. It really does mean a lot to me. After I realized this yesterday. Then I had the thought ok now that I have discovered that I was was afraid ...now what? I've been praying about this for 10 years on this particular trauma and like you said... I thought about many things through out the years and other traumatic experiences. This last one took the last ounce of gas in me. I've become very bitter and angry. I basically gave up on life. I really hope you don't think I am seeking attention and poor pitiful me. I'm not looking for pity. I'm looking for solutions and something stable. I've been reading the Bible for about 40 years. What do you do when you believe God himself has let me down. The very thing I believe to be my rock and foundation of my being aloud this thing to happen. Is saying to me to trust him. My paradigm is this.... Let's say you have known me for a long time and you trusted me through out the years and I show up one day with people that you don't know and take your children from you hide them for 5 days and drag you into the court system take away your kids from you. Hold them over your head and the only way to get them back is to change your faith. Would you ever trust me again? This is only part of what happened to me. I've rehearsed this for 10 years and I can't think of anything I have done to deserve this. I've planned to take off work this week for sukkot. It's a Jewish holiday. ( No I'm not Jewish) I was trying to think of what I would to do during this time. But since I discovered this yesterday I came up with this idea 💡. Since this is a Jewish holiday for Thanksgiving day I will commit this week to get a few notebooks for me and my wife and only write in it the things to be thankful for. There is a few things in this I'm thankful for but sometimes blinded by other things so I plan to write them down. I know love and hate can't live together so I choose to try to ignore hate. In proverbs there's a passage that reads basically this. Where no wood is the fire goes out. So My attempt is to light a different fire and I guess I will see what happens. Sorry for the book I just wrote. But this could be another thing to be grateful for. I'm already grateful for you to take the time to message me and also taking the time to read this reply 😃. I truly hope you have a great day.

  • @Life_42
    @Life_42 ปีที่แล้ว

    Very helpful! Thank you!

  • @zivavi9064
    @zivavi9064 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thanks for sharing.

  • @vslifeofcycles5415
    @vslifeofcycles5415 ปีที่แล้ว

    I appreciate your videos!

  • @philipstephan5451
    @philipstephan5451 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I was getting better, having less instant flashbacks of my traumatic events. Recently I am having them more often again. I thought I was getting better.

  • @jdiaz4877
    @jdiaz4877 ปีที่แล้ว

    so good well done!

  • @travisbartholomay
    @travisbartholomay ปีที่แล้ว

    That's amazing. Thank you

  • @naturallyherb
    @naturallyherb ปีที่แล้ว

    Very well said!

  • @ommanipadmehung3014
    @ommanipadmehung3014 ปีที่แล้ว

    Brilliant as usual

  • @Mushroom321-
    @Mushroom321- ปีที่แล้ว

    Such life changing content... !! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻😌🥰

  • @JenniferNowlin-fv8qz
    @JenniferNowlin-fv8qz 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I'm really traumitized from my past and got hurt badly lots of times but by Grace of God still here

  • @emrealtun8842
    @emrealtun8842 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank you Emma. We are better thanks to you. Hi from Turkey❤

  • @SisterAudreyReagan
    @SisterAudreyReagan 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    This changed my life and body

  • @dianed5193
    @dianed5193 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I have used the NLP technique, the movie rewind. It is very effective in taking away the emotion of that memory. Still working on some....

  • @cristinaevans139
    @cristinaevans139 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you so much ❤❤❤

  • @J.DaviesArt
    @J.DaviesArt หลายเดือนก่อน

    I've been ranting online about traumatising events. I'm coming to the conclusion that i did it partly because im fed up of living through a phone. Through sharing on platforms ive caused a massive trigger content for myself now i dont want to not use any of it lol good idea but bit of a catch 22 either way im reducing my use of social media and my phone over all. 😉 stay strong everyone. Remember your survivor's and are capale of healing and living happy lives ❤

  • @RedgarJNR
    @RedgarJNR 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Thank you 🙏💚

  • @RobynLynn07
    @RobynLynn07 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    God bless you 💕

  • @onomatopoeia7505
    @onomatopoeia7505 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    You can never lose the experience, you can change the emotion that goes with it. I specialize in regression therapy that takes you back to that point in time, but with the knowledge of the now. This still amazes me to this day as it has so far worked for 100% of my clients.

    • @1browngirl29
      @1browngirl29 ปีที่แล้ว

      Regression therapy doesn’t bode well when the memory is childhood sexual trauma though

    • @kyamirin564
      @kyamirin564 ปีที่แล้ว

      That's really helpful, thank you for sharing

  • @saq1458
    @saq1458 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thanks for the video!, really helpful as i am struggling with remembering the feeling and a vivid memory of the trauma and yet still affects my whole life Until today, should i remember them clearly in order to heal/process them? Thats scary!

  • @angie_miki
    @angie_miki ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I need you as my therapist😞❤️ im going to chronic anxiety all day , depression last night i had another panic attack💔

  • @foxcalledneoii5023
    @foxcalledneoii5023 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Thanks for sharing :)

  • @JennLinsi
    @JennLinsi ปีที่แล้ว +6

    This is GREAT! I have a YT channel dedicated to supporting 20-somethings learn how to LOVE THEIR LIVES no matter what kind of ups & downs they’re experiencing… but I’m in the coaching world and I’m not a mental health professional. I love seeing this type of content out there to support people and it’s a great learning opportunity. Thanks!🌸

  • @heathermatthews7422
    @heathermatthews7422 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Thank you 😊

  • @TheKneeCrumbler
    @TheKneeCrumbler 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    thanks for your help

  • @juliekaalaas9071
    @juliekaalaas9071 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you. 🙏

  • @moonchild6115
    @moonchild6115 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Hi there , Can anyone put the link for Part 1 of this series or can you Emma? Thankyou

  • @sarthakaswal7023
    @sarthakaswal7023 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Such immense knowledge!!

  • @alicehatzoglou5683
    @alicehatzoglou5683 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Extremely helpful for sufferers, and for healthcare professionals. I am wondering, is it possible to develop PTSD symptoms when there is no explicit trauma memory? e.g. because of prenatal trauma. Thank you so much!

  • @DrGearHeadSS
    @DrGearHeadSS ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Thank you for this video. I have so much to work through. I hope I can do it without Retraumatizing myself.

    • @ts3858
      @ts3858 ปีที่แล้ว

      I hear your baby in the background ..😍

  • @cassiestevens8382
    @cassiestevens8382 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thanks❣️

  • @nessie.kittyyy
    @nessie.kittyyy 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I don’t have anyone to share with. So I’m sharing here. I’ve dealt with a lot of abuse in the past but, this one hurt a lot. My uncle abused me, and it haunts me. The way he touched me, how he bruised me. My parents didn’t even care. They let him do it more than once. He was emotionally abusive towards me too. I keep getting flashbacks everyday, and I don’t have anyone to tell, Or vent too.

    • @VincentDelbosque-ot9eo
      @VincentDelbosque-ot9eo 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I’m here you’re not alone at all I’m been through the same thing so we will find light

  • @teresa8287
    @teresa8287 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thanks!

  • @flynnzilla8796
    @flynnzilla8796 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I just want to say that finding a “skilled professional”, for many traumatized people or otherwise, is extremely difficult! Money/insurance, location, disability, not to mention actually finding someone who knows what they are doing and that you connect to! It is not nearly so simple as you express; is there another way other than the internet to find the guidance one needs?

  • @raffatperveen3150
    @raffatperveen3150 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you dear

  • @REBECCAOTIENO-dh7qz
    @REBECCAOTIENO-dh7qz 23 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Thank you

  • @aleidagonzalez9558
    @aleidagonzalez9558 ปีที่แล้ว

    This is great

  • @pieceofpeace2553
    @pieceofpeace2553 ปีที่แล้ว

    may i ask if there's any videos on dealing with impulsivity and irritability/anger issues?

  • @liabeachy
    @liabeachy 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I like your soothing ways . It’s so expensive to get therapy so what do you suggest if money is a problem?