That it’s okay not to be in a relationship, you are in your twenties and you are not dating or seeing someone. Trust me, nothing is wrong with you....enjoy your life and take your time, you will be alright.
I concur! Smiles, No man I fancied for years. Didn’t mind. Slept in the church cos fell so deeply in love with GOD 😂 Dated and married 30s; Infact was proposed to with a live ring before even being asked to court. Develop self for selves’ sake, trust the development process, fix your eyes on GOD. You will still need that fixation even in marriage 😂
Yes, 20s can be a lot of struggle but once you clock 30 the pressure goes off and is like you have seen it all. At my 30s, I am loving myself the more and give less of a fuck to public opinions.
So this felt like I was listening to my older sister and I’m so grateful for you Dimma! My take home points were 1. Take money seriously. Budget effectively. Track where your money goes. 2. To never dim my light and always say what I mean and express myself on likes and dislikes. 3. To stay away from toxic people Kai! This one is deep. 4. To trust my gut feeling. Cuz that thing really knows stuff.. 5. Take note of my strengths🔥
Another one I'm dealing with right now in my early 20s is trying to understand that everyone's reality is different. we mustn't be at the same point in life just because we are the same age. We have different ambitions, aspirations and life paths. I am currently trying to understand that what's important is that I put in my best and focus on what I am aspiring to be and what I want to achieve.
I left an 18 year marriage for many reasons you mentioned in this video!! Guys, Dimma is seriously preaching right now...this right here can save you many years of heartache and feeling misunderstood!! Know yourself, be yourself, and make sure your life choices bring you peace and make you happy!! If you can’t be yourself cut it out! Cut out anything that makes you die a slow death. God bless. Thanks Dimma!!
Dimma I’m making 50 years old this year and some of the things you are talking about I’ve only come to learn in my 40’s you are a very wise young lady. For you younger ladies please take notes because if you have not encountered anything she is talking about I guarantee it you will. I can relate to everything Dimma said and I had to learn it all on my own and it took years for me to learn and it wasn’t easy. Love, love this video
I'm going through this now. I was losing my voice in my 30's. I'll be 40 next year and a switch has gone off! I'm living for MYSELF and have distanced myself from toxic people/job. I'm looking forward to new adventures😇
Happy birthday in advance "It's all in the Feeling":)! Yes, Dimma is a wise young woman, and I'm thinking to myself she was so in tune with herself at an early age. I'm happy for her. I will be turning 40 tomorrow and some of the things she was talking about in her video, I started learning in my mid to late 30s and to be honest, I'm still learning now. At first it was depressing because I wasted my youth trying to please other people, not speaking up for myself, and trying to keep the peace, but the person I was hurting was myself. We only have one to life and we need to live it well, first for God and then for ourselves. I have experienced a lot within these past 7 years that has been a hard lesson to learn, especially in the midst of the pandemic where we were forced to stay put which made us face out issues and think. Though my 20s are gone and I will be out of my 30s, I thank God for the opportunity to redirect my life and be purposeful about it.
@@ifym5455 we have the same experience. I will be turning 40 in Nov. Sometimes I feel I should take back my 20s and my 30s and do some things over again . But thank God I'm doing better now.
I actually struggled a lot with my self image and thinking I’m ‘ugly’ or mid. But something that has really helped me is deciding what I want to see even before looking at the mirror. Before I look in the mirror, I would repeat in my head “ I will see a beautiful girl, I will see a beautiful girl” and when I look in the mirror, I see myself looking beautiful. Not perfect but beautiful nonetheless. I’m 21 btw. Thankyou for this video
I'm grateful I was able to learn about making and saving money really early but the problem now is having that mindset of constantly chasing money and thinking of the 'next thing' which is also not healthy.
Just turned 24 and this is definitely something I needed to hear. I'm at the point where I'm trying to start pushing back against people and what I don't want and this was the encouragement I needed to continue
Love that part about growing apart especially when it comes to friendships. Not everyone will dislike you, not everyone will like you, there has to be a balance - some will like and some will dislike you.
Thinking about what people will say about you is a massive part of the Nigerian culture/society and it is TOXIC. It has ruin people's lives, caused anxiety and depression, silenced the oppressed, and lead to low self-esteem. I wish more people will be aware of this issue. Dimma, this was an amazing video:)
This is so true. Just being yourself, trusting your process even if it will take long is key Mental health is important and just being you without caring what others will say is important in life
"The glow up will come" Everything you said on this is currently happening in my life. And when people say am shining am like , I ain't where I wanna be so u wait. (Well in my mind oo)
Me too ! But I'm 16 and no where close to my dream of becoming a big TH-camr with lots of Subscribers like Dimma. I'm trying my best to grow my channel and Dimma inspires me to keep pushing and have faith ❤️
Nancy don’t sweat it. Give life time it will evolve. I think that there’s so much pressure that young people are putting on themselves and yet they ignore the process of growth that one must go through. So take your time and enjoy the process. Keep putting in the work and its a matter of time before the seeds you have sowed come to bear fruit
Great...celebrating you ahead dearly. I will advise you have a list of things you will like to achieve each year n in life time.. it help keep you on track. If you miss your steps for whatever reason don't live in regret rather look at ur mistakes learn from it a move..... God bless you n protect you too... much love from my end..❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤🥰🥰🥰🥰❤
I don't know but I'm okay with less friends. There's a time when people I called friends started spreading rumors about me in school. I'm thankful that these things don't get to me. I'm done with them already and looking forward to better days and a better me.
I used to beat myself up, and then began to loose confidence in myself, it was a struggle guys so please Its importance to be kind to yourself and say uplifting things to yourself
This was so reassuring to listen to! Earlier this year, I made the decision to put my best foot forward always, dress nicely because when you look good you feel good. I decided to upskill myself and read more to increase my confidence because Knowlege is power. I can say that that has been the best decision I have ever made, I feel less compelled to compare myself to others and face my lane. I have also started voicing my opinion more where it matters instead of shrinking myself. It feels liberating being the best me ❤️ so thank you for sharing Dimma!
Loved this! I’m turning 24 and I learned most of these when I hit 21 and decided to be serious with my life and intentional with people I bring around me. Love from the US 🤗
It’s so funny how we are so similar My name is Chidinma too, I’m from Anambra too, I’m studying Banking and Finance right now just because I love how bankers look and I hate accounting too Thank you so much for these advices Dinma❤️
I'm so passionate about women supporting other women and the first few minutes of this video speaks to my heart ❤️ thank you for sharing your thoughts.
Fam i wish I learnt all these things you mentioned in my early twenties Dimma. I folded myself so much like so much until last year like I started coming terms with alot of things in my life and the peace that came with that was bliss. Being physically challenged didn't even make it easier for me cuz alot was expected and everytime I did something out of line I would wish the ground to open so I could jump in it like I will continue to tell myself that I was not allowed to make any mistakes cuz alot has been given to me so I would find myself everyday putting so much pressure continuously folding myself ( no Dimma i folded and dimed my light so much i didn't recognize the person staring back at me no it was so bad) and like you said...it all came crashing on me at the end of the day and i drowned so quickly. Thank you for this like it just triggered alot right now 😢 Thank you❤
The biggest mistake I made in my 20s is opening a lot of credit cards after a break-up, I'm still cleaning that mess almost finish them, and wasting years on relationship that want nowhere.
The part where you said you keep pretending to like things you don't like was so loud 😢. I was in a relationship for 7 years pretending. 7. Years. 👀 What kept me there was: what will people say? Now in my late 20s I can safely say that sis is right. The glow up does come, the comfort you feel in your skin, body and even age is unreal. It's so peaceful I love it for me and everyone else who arrives at that self actualisation BC it's 👌🏾
What Abena said.. take time off to decompress. Be with people that truly make you happy. Do what really and honestly makes you happy. Most importantly, don't ever bottle up your feelings. Find good friends to talk to when you are feeling down. Sending you hugs ❤️❤️.
Everybody goes through, certain things in life, we are the soul creators of ourselves, if you don't like certain things, that is happening, slow down, take a deep breath & figure out what is it in life that you like, focus & get busy working on your life purpose, meditate, go to the beach, go to a park, go around children, take up a class start a class for whatever painting, yoga, exercising, singing, reading, cooking, baking cakes/ cookies, God gave us the ability to be creative, you can do it, don't be afraid to talk to people, when you help people that is a good feeling, God bless you, listen to the song, don't waste your life away!
Dimma you literally said so many things that i wish i have known and done in my twenties. Sometimes our African parents contribute alot to these mistakes. They will say that as a woman you can't live on your own except you are going to your husband's house. You can't do certain businesses and you can't have certain amount of money. Sometimes i wish i could turn back the hands of time . My mother even made studied a particular course in school because an auntie thinks its the best for me. Please if you are still in your twenties watching this video make good use it.
I feel like you were talking to me when you said 'do not fold'! I need to get over the fact that everyone should not like me. It's exhausting trying to please everyone. It's a disease and I'm getting cured by God's grace. Thanks for sharing, at least I know I'm not alone
That wanting everyone to like me was my thing and what people say or think about me really got to me back then. Even for my birthday I took it P when certain people don't send wishes or call. However, now ebi like say old age don kick in well, I don't send anybody, love keeping to myself and not very interested in making certain people close to me or them wanting to be my friend. Visiting family and friends is now a chore and I'm not offended if you don't visit, because I might not return the visit. Make we love each other from a far abeg.
Just felt like you were talking about me in my 20s and even in my 30s I still struggle with a number of these things😪.One sweet thing about you is the way your content is relatable for everyone. A million kisses to you for this video 😘
Was married at age 25,but still had issues and similar crises. In it all we Learn from our mistakes and become a better version of ourselves, besides Dim Dim you look Dashy
This was a really good video. Life is funny man. We all go through the same thing just at different times. My takeaways from this video were: 1. Own who you are and really love yourself. 2. Focus on what makes you feel good. The things and people that bring you joy. 3. Hustle! Believe in your craft. The sky isn’t the limit tbh Thanks D! We’ve heard you ❤️
I loveeeed this video! I'm about to turn 20 and I've been struggling with all these. From being a people pleaser, to unending insecurities. I cried so much watching this Love youuuuu big sisssss
I'm 20 watching this video and it's like I am learning all these things all at the same time, I can relate to this video too well for someone who is literally just starting their 20's😅. All of these thoughts were things I battled with and learnt from in my teens and I appreciate this video because it is helping me put things in perspective.
but I'm looking for a friend like you Dimma! cant find anyone. You described in one of your earlier videos your journey and how you got there and I could relate to so many things, I think a lot of the things you said in the video, I have already realized but because of my age, I don't have a lot of people that have realized the same things...so its hard for me to find friends. I try to keep educating myself sha and hopefully one day ill be surrounded by more high quality friends and be in more high quality relationships. I'm genuinely looking forward to it.
Oh Lord! The TRUTH in dimming your light for “peace to reign” As an Ada, that has been my BIGGEST struggle. I’ve had severe mental breakdowns and I keep pretending to be okay for the sake of my siblings etc. And I’m done doing that.
As an Ada myself, I can relate to what you said but I'm telling you, you can do it. I decided last year that I was done with taking a back seat with my siblings. I've given my whole life and I'm done doing that.
I am one year away from my 20s but something I am realising every day is that it is pointless to let people's opinions of you frame what you do. Since I was a child, I have loved dancing and always dance no matter how poorly it looked. As a child, my family would laugh with me when I danced and it brought me joy. As I aged, people pointed out how badly I danced and that really affected my desire to publicly dance. Now, I learn different afrobeat dances with ease and dance fairly well. People will still give their opinion and tell me I am a bad dancer. I have both told them to mind their business or ignored them. If I am now at a stage where I can teach people certain dance moves and yet, people still shame me because they remember me to be bad at doing things. I say all this because people who are unhappy with themselves will always remember you at your worst. People who remember when I was not that great a dancer constantly remind me that I am not good and when I tell them to point out where exactly I messed up, they are unable to. Additionally, when people constantly point out your flaws, you feel less willling to do and GROW in those things. This story has replicated itself in different aspects of my life; speaking my language, speaking pidgin, dancing, singing, my goals, my body image. These people fall in so many brackets and they would rather see your downfall than your success. Since I realised how much these people take away from me rather than add to me, I started trying to grow in the things I was ridiculed for which I enjoy. Now, I dance, sing, speak pidgin etc without a care for how anyone else feels about me. What brings you joy should not be cut out of your life as long as it is not damaging to people or your relationship with God and your favourite people. TL;DR - I have stopped letting how people percieve my passions when performed by me frame my feelings towards those things. Live freely, you should define yourself before anyone else tries to; define yourself and that helps (intelligent) people see who you are through those lenses.
Gush, the inner peace I have now is out of this world. The pressure I put on myself to get married some years back almost drove me to depression. Damn! I feel much better now cos I don't give a flying f*** what anyone thinks. I'm having a great time now.
Facts. I was always the kid that would do what my parents said to keep peace. But in college it became disrespectful because they were not considering me in decisions that concerned my life. Telling me I’m going to do the major they say I’ll do because they are paying the fees...So I put my foot down. And chileeeee my Ghanaian parents were furious. I got beat, slapped, everything in the book. I even ran away because things were getting MAD. Sometimes I would want to just stop putting my foot down but what kept me strong was remembering people like Martin Luther king and John Lewis. We wouldn’t have the rights we have today if they didn’t put their foot down and get beat for it. So please, if keeping peace is costing you your happiness, go through whatever you must go through to be happy in the end. I promise you, you will not regret it.
Just clocked 19 yesterday and I'm starting to get anxious that by next year I'll be a young adult and I haven't even achieved any thing particularly but watching this video has really given me a solid step to what to expect and how to deal with it, thank you Dimma for being the big sister I need.
Thanks Dimma, most of the things you highlighted are just what a lot of young girls deal with especially because societal pressure seem to make us all forget who we are.
Thank you so much Dimma. For me (21yr old female) I'm working on mastering the tip "realize what u have, stop comparing it to that of others and make it work for you"
This is the best advice for me at the moment. Relationship wise, money, content creation, monetizing my skills. Aunty Dim Dim literary advised me in this video🥺. I’m in my earliest 20’s awaiting NYSC. You’re the best ❤️❤️. Thank you. I love 😘
I'm 22 and I've legit made a those mistakes and more right from highschool, but right now am curving out a new path for myself. Initially I've always been a people pleaser , it hurt when people just didn't like me, but now am learning to say "no" respectfully and doing the things I really want to do. I'm also taking money seriously and finding ways of actually putting it to good use. Thanks for the tips, they've Really awakened me to reality
Pure wisdom❤️ My twenties were fraught with anxiety, especially in the workplace as I was subject to incessant bullying. Now I have the knowledge to speak out but it was rough for some years.
Everything you said was so on point sis! Thank you soo much for the gems. 20s can be hard but I find my peace in knowing that nothing/nobody is worth my mental health & wellbeing.
This video is IT! THIS IS IT! After being so unsuccessful with acting like Christ, I have come to the fact that I have to live my life. Nothing surprises me anymore. I'm thankful for growth and self love. Thank you so much DimDim.... I can't wait to meet you🤍
My Sister. This is exactly what my spirit needed to hear today, as I continue my healing journey. Thank you for sharing such a mindful and compassionate video. May The Most High God personally answer your most heartfelt prayer, and continue to increase your territory. Sending love from Toronto. 🇨🇦 P.S. When you wrote "thinking about all the money you spent on Chicken Republic", I nearly fell off my chair. 🤣🤣🤣 This life...
I am so looking forward to this year's intentional women's day because the theme says #choosetochallenge Our very own Okonjo Iweanla has shown us that we can do and be anything, so long we have the courage to do the work. We definitely need more women in power. 🙌
I’m just clocking 21 but I feel like I’ve actually seen it all because they said “A child with no guidances listen when children with parents are been advised by their parents “ thanks a lot for this, I feel so connected to it.💖💖💖
i can personally testify to that glow up part. when I began to be confident in myself and loving my beauty, people started complimenting me, even when i didn't put much effort
Ohh! DImma I can't thank you enough for sharing this it came so on time my teenage daughter Valensia said Dimma is talking about me, am dealing with everything she is saying. Thanks so much honey you motivate young one.🥰❤❤❤❤❤
I’ve been at that point where I used to be scared to speak up. Good thing I realized that it was holding me back from achieving things, I started working on it. Still working on it and yeah, I started saying no to things I don’t really have to do🙂
I love this. I’m in my 20s, not even 22 yet and I’m already going through all of this. It’s hard, it seems inevitable for all, but hopefully I can get myself on track soon.
This video was needed!!! I am about turning 25 this year and I was going through the crisis phase. I finally started accepting life and taking it a day at a time and I feel my mindset changing. This video just helps in so many ways!!
Dim Dim love, the video is so indepth and full of wisdom. I've saved it, and will watch it from time to time as a reminder. "Take not of your strengths especially in your early 20's". I'm almost thirty. As children growing up in Nigeria, our lives and worth revolves around our academic performance. Dimma, I sabi book o, but because I don't come first, or I didn't graduate with a 2'1, it's like my father's money for school fees wasn't put to good use. It distracted me, I became broken,I don't think about my strengths. But I'll start doing so. Thanks Dimma, you're inspirational. I love you and hope to meet you 😘
Toxic people!!! Gosh! You're so right! They downplay, criticize, are dismissive & condescending and mostly blow hot and cold!!! Dinma God Bless You! 💖 💖 💖
I feel like you were speaking to me directly . I’m about to turn 30 and I and just now realizing a lot of things or going through a lot of things you spoke about. This was enlightening and refreshing to know I’m not alone and I can’t turn things around . Thank you Dimma!
The first point!!! Stop entertaining fake friends! Had a friend that had a clique that didn’t like me. She’d always tell me what they say or how they feel and I was always like ??! How can you be friends with people that don’t like me ?? Cut her off COMPLETELY last year and the peace! Hallelujah ✨✨✨✨
I turned 20 in December, and I've dreaded almost every day after then. I have a friend who just turned 20 and I think she kind of has a focused point in life. I just feel like I'm headed nowhere.
This is really amazing and so helpful. I'm just 20 and acting is a very big passion for me. I feel like am not good enough and besides there are many wonderful and talented actress out there but not anymore. I feel so much better and more confident. All I need to work hard towards my dream and I can achieve anything 😍😍🥰🥰.
True talk, you will get to a point where your brain those not have time for nonsense at all. I'm telling you the glow up will come, people would start saying that you are beautiful.
How to take money and savings more seriously, not expecting too much from people and growing apart from friends is okay .. Like you said some people come into our lives for different seasons.. Things I wish I learnt earlier
I just turned 20 couple of months ago and I am thankful of universe for showing up this video on my recommendation! Im sure what u said up here gonna truly help me to survive me life.. One thing more you're GORGEOUS!! ❤️❤️
Dimma is such a brilliant woman, I really wish I knew all these even in my 30's, now in my mid 40's but I learned a lot through the yrs with experience. I pray the younger generation will come across this video and listen to this live saving advice. Bravo Dimdim
I often look in the mirror and thank God I he made me beautiful. I pick out what I like, and tell God thank you for making me beautiful. I'm 29 now, and have made the conscious effort for over a year now that I am honest with people how I honestly feel. My standards have been raised and anyone who can't meet them can leave. I'm teaching people to treat me how I want to be treated.
I'm turning 29 by next year, I kinda feel like I made lots of mistakes in my early 20s all this things I have gone through them and I'm seriously regretting. But well all thanks to you Dimma for this video, I feel so much better, and I'll start monetizing and taking money seriously. Thanks again Dimma
That it’s okay not to be in a relationship, you are in your twenties and you are not dating or seeing someone. Trust me, nothing is wrong with you....enjoy your life and take your time, you will be alright.
I concur! Smiles, No man I fancied for years. Didn’t mind. Slept in the church cos fell so deeply in love with GOD 😂
Dated and married 30s; Infact was proposed to with a live ring before even being asked to court. Develop self for selves’ sake, trust the development process, fix your eyes on GOD. You will still need that fixation even in marriage 😂
The pressure to get married before 30...is absurd and stupid...I couldn't agree with you more
Thanks
Yes, 20s can be a lot of struggle but once you clock 30 the pressure goes off and is like you have seen it all. At my 30s, I am loving myself the more and give less of a fuck to public opinions.
Me too
Here for this ENERGY!!!🙌
This is so true
Gbam....
Stop pretending to like things that you don't like just to maintain peace at the expense of your own happiness.
- Dimma
This statement was meant for me. Now I know better
Well said!
When I came to the realization that not everybody is going to like you - fam the peace that comes with this is mad.
Dangerous situation😂be yourself
🤩
I'm 19 and its so hard to come to terms with this 😩
It’s a beautiful place to be!
Lmfaooo
"There comes a time when your brain does not have time for nonsense again." YES and YES
😂
So this felt like I was listening to my older sister and I’m so grateful for you Dimma! My take home points were
1. Take money seriously. Budget effectively. Track where your money goes.
2. To never dim my light and always say what I mean and express myself on likes and dislikes.
3. To stay away from toxic people Kai! This one is deep.
4. To trust my gut feeling. Cuz that thing really knows stuff..
5. Take note of my strengths🔥
Another one I'm dealing with right now in my early 20s is trying to understand that everyone's reality is different. we mustn't be at the same point in life just because we are the same age. We have different ambitions, aspirations and life paths. I am currently trying to understand that what's important is that I put in my best and focus on what I am aspiring to be and what I want to achieve.
Thank you for this comment!!!🙏💚
I needed to hear this!!!! 💓💓💓💓
Wow!
That's one of the best lessons I learned in my 20s
I left an 18 year marriage for many reasons you mentioned in this video!! Guys, Dimma is seriously preaching right now...this right here can save you many years of heartache and feeling misunderstood!! Know yourself, be yourself, and make sure your life choices bring you peace and make you happy!! If you can’t be yourself cut it out! Cut out anything that makes you die a slow death. God bless. Thanks Dimma!!
Of course she feels better 😄
@@smilergal89 Should have left sooner😊
This is me right now, I just want to get out but no means
Hugs I can relate..
Dimma I’m making 50 years old this year and some of the things you are talking about I’ve only come to learn in my 40’s you are a very wise young lady. For you younger ladies please take notes because if you have not encountered anything she is talking about I guarantee it you will. I can relate to everything Dimma said and I had to learn it all on my own and it took years for me to learn and it wasn’t easy. Love, love this video
I'm going through this now. I was losing my voice in my 30's. I'll be 40 next year and a switch has gone off! I'm living for MYSELF and have distanced myself from toxic people/job. I'm looking forward to new adventures😇
thanks for this.
🤩
Happy birthday in advance "It's all in the Feeling":)! Yes, Dimma is a wise young woman, and I'm thinking to myself she was so in tune with herself at an early age. I'm happy for her. I will be turning 40 tomorrow and some of the things she was talking about in her video, I started learning in my mid to late 30s and to be honest, I'm still learning now. At first it was depressing because I wasted my youth trying to please other people, not speaking up for myself, and trying to keep the peace, but the person I was hurting was myself. We only have one to life and we need to live it well, first for God and then for ourselves. I have experienced a lot within these past 7 years that has been a hard lesson to learn, especially in the midst of the pandemic where we were forced to stay put which made us face out issues and think. Though my 20s are gone and I will be out of my 30s, I thank God for the opportunity to redirect my life and be purposeful about it.
@@ifym5455 we have the same experience. I will be turning 40 in Nov. Sometimes I feel I should take back my 20s and my 30s and do some things over again . But thank God I'm doing better now.
I actually struggled a lot with my self image and thinking I’m ‘ugly’ or mid. But something that has really helped me is deciding what I want to see even before looking at the mirror. Before I look in the mirror, I would repeat in my head “ I will see a beautiful girl, I will see a beautiful girl” and when I look in the mirror, I see myself looking beautiful. Not perfect but beautiful nonetheless. I’m 21 btw. Thankyou for this video
You’re actually really beautiful.
i struggle with this till this day its so hard for me.
As in... the g in gorgeous!
are u kidding us ... with this dp i'm seeing haa
I love this, thank you for taking the time out to post this 💞
I'm grateful I was able to learn about making and saving money really early but the problem now is having that mindset of constantly chasing money and thinking of the 'next thing' which is also not healthy.
Oh my God..me right now
Me! I’m learning to spend and enjoy the money I make but it’s still tough
Just turned 24 and this is definitely something I needed to hear. I'm at the point where I'm trying to start pushing back against people and what I don't want and this was the encouragement I needed to continue
Love that part about growing apart especially when it comes to friendships. Not everyone will dislike you, not everyone will like you, there has to be a balance - some will like and some will dislike you.
My brother just told me, he loves that I am listening to and watching your videos
He said, if I ever feel down, I should watch your videos😊😊😊🥰
Your brother is amazing to say the least. Help me tell him.
You have an awesome brother who cares about your mental health. Don't ever take this privilege for granted.
Awhhhh 🥺💝.
Thinking about what people will say about you is a massive part of the Nigerian culture/society and it is TOXIC.
It has ruin people's lives, caused anxiety and depression, silenced the oppressed, and lead to low self-esteem. I wish more people will be aware of this issue. Dimma, this was an amazing video:)
This is so true.
Just being yourself, trusting your process even if it will take long is key Mental health is important and just being you without caring what others will say is important in life
MUSLIMS NATION is a disaster bad MANAGERS ask their women ok thanks.
"Stop pretending to like things you do not like" and "taking people's displeasure to heart" so Apt.😇😇🤗🤗
🙌🏾
True
The part of keeping quiet for peace is soo mee. I hate how I am always afraid to speak up. Ugh this was so needed dimma.
"The glow up will come"
Everything you said on this is currently happening in my life. And when people say am shining am like , I ain't where I wanna be so u wait. (Well in my mind oo)
Needed this today, I'm turning 24 in three weeks and I feel like I am nowhere close to where I want to be...Thanks Dimma
You'll be fine Nancy💕
Me too ! But I'm 16 and no where close to my dream of becoming a big TH-camr with lots of Subscribers like Dimma. I'm trying my best to grow my channel and Dimma inspires me to keep pushing and have faith ❤️
Nancy don’t sweat it. Give life time it will evolve. I think that there’s so much pressure that young people are putting on themselves and yet they ignore the process of growth that one must go through. So take your time and enjoy the process. Keep putting in the work and its a matter of time before the seeds you have sowed come to bear fruit
we are on the same boat😫
Great...celebrating you ahead dearly. I will advise you have a list of things you will like to achieve each year n in life time.. it help keep you on track. If you miss your steps for whatever reason don't live in regret rather look at ur mistakes learn from it a move..... God bless you n protect you too... much love from my end..❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤🥰🥰🥰🥰❤
I don't know but I'm okay with less friends. There's a time when people I called friends started spreading rumors about me in school. I'm thankful that these things don't get to me. I'm done with them already and looking forward to better days and a better me.
I used to beat myself up, and then began to loose confidence in myself, it was a struggle guys so please Its importance to be kind to yourself and say uplifting things to yourself
This was so reassuring to listen to! Earlier this year, I made the decision to put my best foot forward always, dress nicely because when you look good you feel good. I decided to upskill myself and read more to increase my confidence because Knowlege is power. I can say that that has been the best decision I have ever made, I feel less compelled to compare myself to others and face my lane. I have also started voicing my opinion more where it matters instead of shrinking myself. It feels liberating being the best me ❤️ so thank you for sharing Dimma!
💕🌹
UNICAF was right to choose you for this video. 🤗
Loved this! I’m turning 24 and I learned most of these when I hit 21 and decided to be serious with my life and intentional with people I bring around me. Love from the US 🤗
It’s so funny how we are so similar
My name is Chidinma too, I’m from Anambra too, I’m studying Banking and Finance right now just because I love how bankers look and I hate accounting too
Thank you so much for these advices Dinma❤️
Same here! Except I studied Electrical Engineering ☺️
Chidinma Afamefuna Hi. I’m studying Electrical and Electronic engineering too
@@chidinmamuomah8392 what is this show off now.. My own name is Vanessa
Leemao..there has to be a thing about Chidinmas that we don't know 😂
Ok. Chidinma s are marking register here. Lol
I'm so passionate about women supporting other women and the first few minutes of this video speaks to my heart ❤️ thank you for sharing your thoughts.
🤩
Fam i wish I learnt all these things you mentioned in my early twenties Dimma. I folded myself so much like so much until last year like I started coming terms with alot of things in my life and the peace that came with that was bliss. Being physically challenged didn't even make it easier for me cuz alot was expected and everytime I did something out of line I would wish the ground to open so I could jump in it like I will continue to tell myself that I was not allowed to make any mistakes cuz alot has been given to me so I would find myself everyday putting so much pressure continuously folding myself ( no Dimma i folded and dimed my light so much i didn't recognize the person staring back at me no it was so bad) and like you said...it all came crashing on me at the end of the day and i drowned so quickly. Thank you for this like it just triggered alot right now 😢 Thank you❤
You are amazing
The biggest mistake I made in my 20s is opening a lot of credit cards after a break-up, I'm still cleaning that mess almost finish them, and wasting years on relationship that want nowhere.
I’m going through the same phase at 25. Quarter life crisis. Thank you so much for this video 🙏🏾❤️
You are doing great dear, sometimes I’ll be like God when will I blow like Vivian 🤗
Hello Vivian...just wanted to say you are doing extremely very well. Missed you on this TH-cam streets too. Hang in there, I am rooting for you ❤️
Whew Chile just turned 25 and I'm going through too! 😂
Vivian okezie 💓💓 and dinma umeh my favs
Who doesn't love to listen to an advice from a sweet sister like Dimma. I'm all glued to this 💞💞💞
I know right
🥰🙌🏽🥰
The part where you said you keep pretending to like things you don't like was so loud 😢.
I was in a relationship for 7 years pretending. 7. Years. 👀 What kept me there was: what will people say?
Now in my late 20s I can safely say that sis is right. The glow up does come, the comfort you feel in your skin, body and even age is unreal. It's so peaceful I love it for me and everyone else who arrives at that self actualisation BC it's 👌🏾
I’m tired of everything. Relationship, work.. I’m just exhausted from within 😞
It's hard but not impossible. Take in a deep breath, relax, re-strategize, and get up and move on! Yes you can 💖
What Abena said.. take time off to decompress. Be with people that truly make you happy. Do what really and honestly makes you happy. Most importantly, don't ever bottle up your feelings. Find good friends to talk to when you are feeling down. Sending you hugs ❤️❤️.
Take a vacay, I hope things get better for you🙏🙏
Everybody goes through, certain things in life, we are the soul creators of ourselves, if you don't like certain things, that is happening, slow down, take a deep breath & figure out what is it in life that you like, focus & get busy working on your life purpose, meditate, go to the beach, go to a park, go around children, take up a class start a class for whatever painting, yoga, exercising, singing, reading, cooking, baking cakes/ cookies, God gave us the ability to be creative, you can do it, don't be afraid to talk to people, when you help people that is a good feeling, God bless you, listen to the song, don't waste your life away!
Dimma you literally said so many things that i wish i have known and done in my twenties. Sometimes our African parents contribute alot to these mistakes. They will say that as a woman you can't live on your own except you are going to your husband's house. You can't do certain businesses and you can't have certain amount of money. Sometimes i wish i could turn back the hands of time . My mother even made studied a particular course in school because an auntie thinks its the best for me.
Please if you are still in your twenties watching this video make good use it.
I feel like you were talking to me when you said 'do not fold'! I need to get over the fact that everyone should not like me. It's exhausting trying to please everyone. It's a disease and I'm getting cured by God's grace. Thanks for sharing, at least I know I'm not alone
It’s the societal pressure, I’m there now 😅 but I refuse to be PRESSURED Nne
That wanting everyone to like me was my thing and what people say or think about me really got to me back then. Even for my birthday I took it P when certain people don't send wishes or call. However, now ebi like say old age don kick in well, I don't send anybody, love keeping to myself and not very interested in making certain people close to me or them wanting to be my friend. Visiting family and friends is now a chore and I'm not offended if you don't visit, because I might not return the visit. Make we love each other from a far abeg.
Still in my 20's though but I wish I educated myself in my early 20's
It's never too late, a degree is a degree regardless of when you got it
Just felt like you were talking about me in my 20s and even in my 30s I still struggle with a number of these things😪.One sweet thing about you is the way your content is relatable for everyone. A million kisses to you for this video 😘
🙌🏽
Everybody talking about age 25, I've been going through it since age 20 and still doing at 22.
I just turned 22 and i feel the same way
I really needed to hear this... My 20's crisis has started
I’m right smack in the middle of my crisis
Same with me
Same here
I just needed to see this. I'm turning 27 this year and I don't think I'm close to achieving my dreams, sometimes I feel like I'm not doing enough.
You can do it sis, chin up and keep going 💪🏾
I’m 27 already n I just got my first degree, I Just feel I’m left behind 😢 I just want more for myself, I pray God direct me to achieve more🙏
" i dont think i have ever been as beautiful as i consider myself to be now" made me so happy and so hype. I am exactly at the point of my life
Was married at age 25,but still had issues and similar crises. In it all we Learn from our mistakes and become a better version of ourselves, besides Dim Dim you look Dashy
some of us are way over our 20s and are still learning, thanks dim dim
This was a really good video.
Life is funny man. We all go through the same thing just at different times. My takeaways from this video were:
1. Own who you are and really love yourself.
2. Focus on what makes you feel good. The things and people that bring you joy.
3. Hustle! Believe in your craft. The sky isn’t the limit tbh
Thanks D! We’ve heard you ❤️
I loveeeed this video! I'm about to turn 20 and I've been struggling with all these. From being a people pleaser, to unending insecurities.
I cried so much watching this
Love youuuuu big sisssss
🤗 🥰
Thank mm
M. M
Z z
I'm 20 watching this video and it's like I am learning all these things all at the same time, I can relate to this video too well for someone who is literally just starting their 20's😅. All of these thoughts were things I battled with and learnt from in my teens and I appreciate this video because it is helping me put things in perspective.
"Pay attention to ur Guts Feeling" #KEY😉🙂😜SPOT ON Mma 👌🏾🤗
'Some people are seasonal'! Loud it Dinma🗣️
but I'm looking for a friend like you Dimma! cant find anyone. You described in one of your earlier videos your journey and how you got there and I could relate to so many things, I think a lot of the things you said in the video, I have already realized but because of my age, I don't have a lot of people that have realized the same things...so its hard for me to find friends. I try to keep educating myself sha and hopefully one day ill be surrounded by more high quality friends and be in more high quality relationships. I'm genuinely looking forward to it.
Oh Lord! The TRUTH in dimming your light for “peace to reign”
As an Ada, that has been my BIGGEST struggle. I’ve had severe mental breakdowns and I keep pretending to be okay for the sake of my siblings etc. And I’m done doing that.
As an Ada myself, I can relate to what you said but I'm telling you, you can do it. I decided last year that I was done with taking a back seat with my siblings. I've given my whole life and I'm done doing that.
"There is no amount of money that is your size" Word!!👌🔥
This was so helpful. But, before now I've always known that what people think of me isn't important.
i just turned 25 today (March 5th) and honestly I
enjoy this.
I am one year away from my 20s but something I am realising every day is that it is pointless to let people's opinions of you frame what you do. Since I was a child, I have loved dancing and always dance no matter how poorly it looked. As a child, my family would laugh with me when I danced and it brought me joy. As I aged, people pointed out how badly I danced and that really affected my desire to publicly dance.
Now, I learn different afrobeat dances with ease and dance fairly well. People will still give their opinion and tell me I am a bad dancer. I have both told them to mind their business or ignored them. If I am now at a stage where I can teach people certain dance moves and yet, people still shame me because they remember me to be bad at doing things.
I say all this because people who are unhappy with themselves will always remember you at your worst. People who remember when I was not that great a dancer constantly remind me that I am not good and when I tell them to point out where exactly I messed up, they are unable to. Additionally, when people constantly point out your flaws, you feel less willling to do and GROW in those things. This story has replicated itself in different aspects of my life; speaking my language, speaking pidgin, dancing, singing, my goals, my body image. These people fall in so many brackets and they would rather see your downfall than your success.
Since I realised how much these people take away from me rather than add to me, I started trying to grow in the things I was ridiculed for which I enjoy. Now, I dance, sing, speak pidgin etc without a care for how anyone else feels about me. What brings you joy should not be cut out of your life as long as it is not damaging to people or your relationship with God and your favourite people.
TL;DR - I have stopped letting how people percieve my passions when performed by me frame my feelings towards those things. Live freely, you should define yourself before anyone else tries to; define yourself and that helps (intelligent) people see who you are through those lenses.
Gush, the inner peace I have now is out of this world. The pressure I put on myself to get married some years back almost drove me to depression. Damn! I feel much better now cos I don't give a flying f*** what anyone thinks. I'm having a great time now.
Facts. I was always the kid that would do what my parents said to keep peace. But in college it became disrespectful because they were not considering me in decisions that concerned my life. Telling me I’m going to do the major they say I’ll do because they are paying the fees...So I put my foot down. And chileeeee my Ghanaian parents were furious. I got beat, slapped, everything in the book. I even ran away because things were getting MAD. Sometimes I would want to just stop putting my foot down but what kept me strong was remembering people like Martin Luther king and John Lewis. We wouldn’t have the rights we have today if they didn’t put their foot down and get beat for it. So please, if keeping peace is costing you your happiness, go through whatever you must go through to be happy in the end. I promise you, you will not regret it.
Just clocked 19 yesterday and I'm starting to get anxious that by next year I'll be a young adult and I haven't even achieved any thing particularly but watching this video has really given me a solid step to what to expect and how to deal with it, thank you Dimma for being the big sister I need.
Mid 20s and sis, you're right. You're sooooo right.
Tomorrow is my 23rd birthday. This is the video I needed!!!!
Happy birthday to you 🎊
Happy birthday 🥳
Thanks Dimma, most of the things you highlighted are just what a lot of young girls deal with especially because societal pressure seem to make us all forget who we are.
Thank you so much Dimma. For me (21yr old female) I'm working on mastering the tip "realize what u have, stop comparing it to that of others and make it work for you"
This is the best advice for me at the moment. Relationship wise, money, content creation, monetizing my skills. Aunty Dim Dim literary advised me in this video🥺. I’m in my earliest 20’s awaiting NYSC. You’re the best ❤️❤️. Thank you. I love 😘
Lol, how early is your 20s, let's know if we are caught in the same web
Please save during Nysc oh cause life after Nysc is a whole struggle,but I pray you don’t go through that stress. Amen
I turned 20 today. This video is really needed. Thank you 💓
I needed to hear about the money part. I was spending money as it came. I've come to regret those choices.
I'm 22 and I've legit made a those mistakes and more right from highschool, but right now am curving out a new path for myself.
Initially I've always been a people pleaser , it hurt when people just didn't like me, but now am learning to say "no" respectfully and doing the things I really want to do.
I'm also taking money seriously and finding ways of actually putting it to good use.
Thanks for the tips, they've Really awakened me to reality
Yes ... caring too much about what people think is a major problem, but I'm growing out of that now👍🏽
Am in my 20's so this video came in for me at the right time,
Thanks for sharing🙏🏾
Pure wisdom❤️
My twenties were fraught with anxiety, especially in the workplace as I was subject to incessant bullying.
Now I have the knowledge to speak out but it was rough for some years.
I went through the same thing as well.💜💜💜
Everything you said was so on point sis! Thank you soo much for the gems. 20s can be hard but I find my peace in knowing that nothing/nobody is worth my mental health & wellbeing.
This video is IT! THIS IS IT! After being so unsuccessful with acting like Christ, I have come to the fact that I have to live my life. Nothing surprises me anymore. I'm thankful for growth and self love. Thank you so much DimDim.... I can't wait to meet you🤍
My Sister. This is exactly what my spirit needed to hear today, as I continue my healing journey. Thank you for sharing such a mindful and compassionate video. May The Most High God personally answer your most heartfelt prayer, and continue to increase your territory. Sending love from Toronto. 🇨🇦
P.S. When you wrote "thinking about all the money you spent on Chicken Republic", I nearly fell off my chair. 🤣🤣🤣 This life...
I am so looking forward to this year's intentional women's day because the theme says #choosetochallenge Our very own Okonjo Iweanla has shown us that we can do and be anything, so long we have the courage to do the work. We definitely need more women in power. 🙌
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
I’m just clocking 21 but I feel like I’ve actually seen it all because they said “A child with no guidances listen when children with parents are been advised by their parents “ thanks a lot for this, I feel so connected to it.💖💖💖
i can personally testify to that glow up part. when I began to be confident in myself and loving my beauty, people started complimenting me, even when i didn't put much effort
One of the life skills we need is, to discover our strength and leverage it. life will be less complicated.
🥰
Ohh! DImma I can't thank you enough for sharing this it came so on time my teenage daughter Valensia said Dimma is talking about me, am dealing with everything she is saying. Thanks so much honey you motivate young one.🥰❤❤❤❤❤
I’ve been at that point where I used to be scared to speak up. Good thing I realized that it was holding me back from achieving things, I started working on it. Still working on it and yeah, I started saying no to things I don’t really have to do🙂
I love this. I’m in my 20s, not even 22 yet and I’m already going through all of this. It’s hard, it seems inevitable for all, but hopefully I can get myself on track soon.
This video was needed!!! I am about turning 25 this year and I was going through the crisis phase.
I finally started accepting life and taking it a day at a time and I feel my mindset changing. This video just helps in so many ways!!
🥰🤗 🥰
Dim Dim love, the video is so indepth and full of wisdom. I've saved it, and will watch it from time to time as a reminder. "Take not of your strengths especially in your early 20's". I'm almost thirty. As children growing up in Nigeria, our lives and worth revolves around our academic performance. Dimma, I sabi book o, but because I don't come first, or I didn't graduate with a 2'1, it's like my father's money for school fees wasn't put to good use. It distracted me, I became broken,I don't think about my strengths. But I'll start doing so.
Thanks Dimma, you're inspirational. I love you and hope to meet you 😘
This is really deep. This video just touched my major flaws.
You made so much sense that i am rethinking
.
I can tell this is going to be a video I will watch over and over. Soo many pearls of wisdom🥺💫✨ thank you for this video!
🤩
The glow up will come...... 💃
Mine is here already and more is on its way
Toxic people!!! Gosh! You're so right! They downplay, criticize, are dismissive & condescending and mostly blow hot and cold!!!
Dinma God Bless You!
💖 💖 💖
I feel like you were speaking to me directly . I’m about to turn 30 and I and just now realizing a lot of things or going through a lot of things you spoke about. This was enlightening and refreshing to know I’m not alone and I can’t turn things around . Thank you Dimma!
It’s like you made this video specifically for me cos you are speaking about things I’m struggling with right now. Thanks for this 🤎
The first point!!! Stop entertaining fake friends! Had a friend that had a clique that didn’t like me. She’d always tell me what they say or how they feel and I was always like ??! How can you be friends with people that don’t like me ?? Cut her off COMPLETELY last year and the peace! Hallelujah ✨✨✨✨
Very good decision you made 👏
I turned 22 today and I started feeling soo bad because I haven't achieved alot lol. Binge-watching Dimma is quite soothing. Haha.
I turned 20 in December, and I've dreaded almost every day after then. I have a friend who just turned 20 and I think she kind of has a focused point in life. I just feel like I'm headed nowhere.
This is me, I feel like I am just stuck
This is really amazing and so helpful. I'm just 20 and acting is a very big passion for me. I feel like am not good enough and besides there are many wonderful and talented actress out there but not anymore. I feel so much better and more confident. All I need to work hard towards my dream and I can achieve anything 😍😍🥰🥰.
I really needed this esp the not entertaining fake friends part. Thank you Dim Dim, you're the big sister I never had. 😘😘
True talk, you will get to a point where your brain those not have time for nonsense at all. I'm telling you the glow up will come, people would start saying that you are beautiful.
How to take money and savings more seriously, not expecting too much from people and growing apart from friends is okay .. Like you said some people come into our lives for different seasons.. Things I wish I learnt earlier
Saving and Investing - very important.
I just turned 20 couple of months ago and I am thankful of universe for showing up this video on my recommendation! Im sure what u said up here gonna truly help me to survive me life..
One thing more you're GORGEOUS!! ❤️❤️
Dimma is such a brilliant woman, I really wish I knew all these even in my 30's, now in my mid 40's but I learned a lot through the yrs with experience.
I pray the younger generation will come across this video and listen to this live saving advice. Bravo Dimdim
I often look in the mirror and thank God I he made me beautiful. I pick out what I like, and tell God thank you for making me beautiful. I'm 29 now, and have made the conscious effort for over a year now that I am honest with people how I honestly feel. My standards have been raised and anyone who can't meet them can leave. I'm teaching people to treat me how I want to be treated.
I'm turning 29 by next year, I kinda feel like I made lots of mistakes in my early 20s all this things I have gone through them and I'm seriously regretting. But well all thanks to you Dimma for this video, I feel so much better, and I'll start monetizing and taking money seriously.
Thanks again Dimma
Can we just talk about this womans beauty? She looks absolutely stunning wow😵💫