How To Be An American

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 12 ก.ย. 2024
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    DIRECTED BY IFHT
    WRITTEN BY
    IFHT
    DIRECTOR OF PHOTOGRAPHY
    Matt Dennison
    EDITING, NARRATION, SOUND & COLOUR CORRECTION
    Matt Dennison
    RECORDED ON RODE MICROPHONES
    www.www.rode.com
    ----
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ความคิดเห็น • 9K

  • @bert3840
    @bert3840 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1490

    Not ONCE did he mention “Deep fry”, “Cheeseburger”, or “Apple Pie.”

  • @jarettiechroeb1399
    @jarettiechroeb1399 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2093

    "History began july 4th 1776. Everything before that was a mistake."

  • @glenmarmurallon6580
    @glenmarmurallon6580 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1295

    "If you don't have an American flag in your front yard you might be a commie" lol

    • @WanderingLoner1
      @WanderingLoner1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Well it's true, he also said "might be".

    • @heymemesaregreat551
      @heymemesaregreat551 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      He actually said “must be”

    • @mannygutierrez9192
      @mannygutierrez9192 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      They're most likely commies

    • @juliennguyen9518
      @juliennguyen9518 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      That's me lol=)) I dont have the flag and I am a commie lol

    • @juliennguyen9518
      @juliennguyen9518 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Frank Atavar I'm Viet actually=)))

  • @djlesinski7978
    @djlesinski7978 4 ปีที่แล้ว +869

    "do they have oil?" Most accurate part of this video

    • @avacatototo
      @avacatototo 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @Frank Atavar clearly don't act like lol

    • @likaboss7654
      @likaboss7654 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Lol, I think America is a net exporter

    • @sungh00nzz
      @sungh00nzz 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      more like “do they have guns”

    • @unclebruce3045
      @unclebruce3045 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      So....i guess you guys are gonna need some "freedom" to go with that oil. 🙃😄😂

    • @mikerasmusson8749
      @mikerasmusson8749 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@likaboss7654 It was until Biden destroyed the oil industry.

  • @jacksonkendrick943
    @jacksonkendrick943 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2579

    You’re measuring system is completely off we measure in Big Macs per bald eagle

    • @sarahk2722
      @sarahk2722 5 ปีที่แล้ว +75

      We measure everything in football fields and Hiroshima bombs. If it can’t be measured with those it’s not worth measuring.

    • @brysengarner1204
      @brysengarner1204 5 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      Those measurements put a flag on the Moon so....

    • @Stewpot864
      @Stewpot864 5 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      Dont forget diabetes per obese bald eagle

    • @dandy2824
      @dandy2824 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      ItsGama lol

    • @dandy2824
      @dandy2824 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Sarah Khorshidian Lol

  • @red3703
    @red3703 5 ปีที่แล้ว +964

    Wait, Canada exists? I thought that was one of those myths they told kids like how vegetables are healthy.

    • @narratamisenpai5226
      @narratamisenpai5226 4 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      I'm Canadian and this comment made my day...Ww𐤔ʷ 🤣ّ ʷ𐤔wW & I love vegetables!

    • @eunac3037
      @eunac3037 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Aw flip, I saw that somewhere before and I can't remember where it's from-

    • @WanderingLoner1
      @WanderingLoner1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Ha Ha... Very funny :/

    • @ibtsamahmad153
      @ibtsamahmad153 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Go_Boston man just f you

    • @Allandeverythingphotos
      @Allandeverythingphotos 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @mega smega just buy and M4 and bald eagle,Move to the south and that’s the American Dream.

  • @Vanalovan
    @Vanalovan 8 ปีที่แล้ว +491

    Fuck yeah, tUeSdAy is my favorite holiday of the year!

    • @nynysplosion3138
      @nynysplosion3138 8 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Tuesday! USA! Tuesday! USA!

    • @cherierondeau5284
      @cherierondeau5284 8 ปีที่แล้ว

      best comment rotlmao

    • @harry6894
      @harry6894 8 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Yaaass USA!!!

    • @eveningdim7167
      @eveningdim7167 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      +chérie rondeau Agreed

    • @DimishaRodgers
      @DimishaRodgers 8 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      I thought that was random until I saw this comment.. OH! That is soo smart. hahaha. Not only will I celebrate Friday Eve, but now Tuesday! Thanks guys!

  • @momo.netorare898
    @momo.netorare898 4 ปีที่แล้ว +198

    I’m stealing “of course I’m free this is America” whenever someone asks me if I’m available to do something

    • @WanderingLoner1
      @WanderingLoner1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Me too, i'd say "i'm always free".

    • @tonikronpass_15
      @tonikronpass_15 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I use this in Germany from now on, but mixed with Russia, so it's accurate: " Of course I'm free for my comrade!, this is socialism"

    • @everettbernard5741
      @everettbernard5741 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      i cant use that one

  • @Hello-ek7md
    @Hello-ek7md 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1947

    *Step 29:* When a cop approaches you, whip out your phone and scream, “I kNoW mY rIgHtS!”

    • @billymanson1790
      @billymanson1790 5 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      Hay we don’t talk bout that part of us those people are Liberals and should go... extinct.
      For you non Americans a liberal is a Nazi that doesn’t like guns and what’s the Govt to take our rights

    • @hamzasami8362
      @hamzasami8362 5 ปีที่แล้ว +62

      @@billymanson1790 Can't blame them.
      Us Canadian live in peace with very little amount of the public owning guns. It's pretty easy, public doesn't have guns, gun related incidents are very rare. The police have a sidearm but rarely ever need to use it. You like guns? Go spend a day in the shooting range or get yourself a license for one.

    • @billymanson1790
      @billymanson1790 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Hamza Sami a lot of gun “violence”/ gun deaths are citizens using there firearm to defend/ protect there property it’s just the social-media and the news show it in a bad way

    • @hamzasami8362
      @hamzasami8362 5 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      @@billymanson1790 well guess what, if the defender and the attacker didn't have access to weapons, the chances of anything happening will drop significantly in the first place. I understand your point of view but when comparing a country whom operates differently in terms of gun control; The liberals are correct. It's not a fun thing to swallow, but it's the reality.

    • @tdub6542
      @tdub6542 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      💀💀

  • @vatoperro249
    @vatoperro249 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3213

    This video is 1776% Accurate

    • @caesarvi1803
      @caesarvi1803 6 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      A lot of nasty comments. But you sir, just made my day🇺🇸

    • @randomman2452
      @randomman2452 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      T10A25M 1 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

    • @TheCrimsonLord
      @TheCrimsonLord 5 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      No it’s 2018% accurate

    • @KristenStPeter-xe5tj
      @KristenStPeter-xe5tj 5 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      @@TheCrimsonLord 1776 the year the revolutionary war started. You probably already knew that but yeet.

    • @KillerWolf-zy5rf
      @KillerWolf-zy5rf 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      T10A25M 1 I hate you

  • @cryptichex6943
    @cryptichex6943 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2319

    You forgot to add
    "Make fun of Canadians and how polite we are”

    • @ryanm2279
      @ryanm2279 8 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      It's fun though

    • @ryanm2279
      @ryanm2279 8 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      James B nah, pretty polite to everyone else still

    • @ryanm2279
      @ryanm2279 8 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      DJ Lime AniZar sloppy, thats new. Still pretty polite compared to what I've heard before.

    • @wasd7819
      @wasd7819 8 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      i'm not an american and my first canadian friend wasn't very polite and friendly

    • @marcog5163
      @marcog5163 8 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      ur dumb

  • @tylerkihut8328
    @tylerkihut8328 4 ปีที่แล้ว +139

    You forgot to add “brag about your military”

    • @runner05
      @runner05 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I’ve never once heard anyone in America brag about that

    • @yourneighborhoodwierdo8349
      @yourneighborhoodwierdo8349 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@runner05 same. nobody does it unless asked for

    • @MajorBoondoggle
      @MajorBoondoggle 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@yourneighborhoodwierdo8349 Really? Cause a lot of us have the impression that the us military is the only reason anyone is allowed to say the word freedom

    • @yourneighborhoodwierdo8349
      @yourneighborhoodwierdo8349 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@MajorBoondoggle it's not the only reason. but it's one of them

    • @lukedowney8212
      @lukedowney8212 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      America's military is fuckin badass

  • @calix7333
    @calix7333 6 ปีที่แล้ว +6677

    Um, excuse me, all Americans do not own a pet eagle.
    We each have thirteen pet eagles to represent the thirteen original colonies. Get your facts straight, Canada.

    • @calix7333
      @calix7333 6 ปีที่แล้ว +273

      I can't tell if I'm missing the sarcasm in your comment or if you're missing the sarcasm in my comment.

    • @suhgar
      @suhgar 6 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      I will take notes eh

    • @venomtang
      @venomtang 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Lmao u win

    • @mynemsad
      @mynemsad 6 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      At least I know that your just being sarcastic and supportive everyone else doesn’t know that that’s a joke comment

    • @timbuktu8069
      @timbuktu8069 6 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      We have one for each state. But I'm sad. I don't know what to do with the one that represents California.

  • @xinhengc
    @xinhengc 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1859

    Only know one language

    • @residentalien818
      @residentalien818 5 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      We speak American!

    • @redbrixanimations
      @redbrixanimations 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Henry C I’m American but I speak 3. Most kids in my class speak 2

    • @residentalien818
      @residentalien818 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @The Gay Dolphin Oh my, smart one indeed!

    • @crashandburnie5548
      @crashandburnie5548 5 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      Untrue. We speak fluent sarcasm

    • @Daniel-dj5pd
      @Daniel-dj5pd 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@crashandburnie5548 Ah ha, Britain might have you licked there.

  • @coolblast3
    @coolblast3 8 ปีที่แล้ว +512

    The Logic of the US
    Guns : Completely A-ok
    Kinder Eggs: Fuck you,your kids will choke on they toy parts inside the impossible to open capsule
    Tanks: COMPLETELY LEGAL if you remove the cannon

    • @jimlahey7634
      @jimlahey7634 8 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      What's your point? That is all logical thinking.

    • @coolblast3
      @coolblast3 8 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Jim Lahey
      Please be a troll .=.

    • @mfk12340
      @mfk12340 8 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      You can own a tank with a cannon. You just need a waver

    • @jacobseiberg9819
      @jacobseiberg9819 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      but thats true you can own a tank with the gun as long as you wait 20 days and sign a waver

    • @jimlahey7634
      @jimlahey7634 8 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      +Pedro The Grimm Santa my right to bear arms is a right. Kinder eggs are not a right, they are a want.

  • @Opal7777
    @Opal7777 4 ปีที่แล้ว +821

    Dont forget:
    kinder eggs are the most dangerous killing machines on Earth, but guns are safe fun for everyone

    • @rawleighsellers4525
      @rawleighsellers4525 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      yeahhhhhh

    • @billymanson1790
      @billymanson1790 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Exactly, I love guns I just bout a Armalite rifle chambers in 5.56 It is a beast.

    • @Odd_Ball69
      @Odd_Ball69 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Billymanson 1 nice bro I’m getting one for my b day

    • @billymanson1790
      @billymanson1790 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hero Hayden Sweet

    • @joeydr1497
      @joeydr1497 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Ha ha ha
      wait seriously

  • @venividivivi
    @venividivivi 6 ปีที่แล้ว +159

    I was about to comment about how false the suing thing was, until I remembered that there was a man who waited four hours for a large hanging "P" in a Walmart "Pharmacy" sign to fall on his head so he could sue them.
    You can go fact check that. It's true.

    • @vivacious-hq1bx
      @vivacious-hq1bx 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Did it ever fall on him?

    • @venividivivi
      @venividivivi 6 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      For the record, it did.

    • @thomaswaller8195
      @thomaswaller8195 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Vivian Wang you forgot about the lady who sued for 3 million dollars because she spilled coffee on herself

    • @gamerisrbija
      @gamerisrbija 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      T W,My god,this is why I don't like Americans,look up the case yourself,heck,Adam Ruins Everything has a whole episode on the campaign the companies led against the poor woman.

    • @aamgdp
      @aamgdp 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Does it sound utterly unprobable and ridiculous? was it in america? -yeah it happened

  • @petapeta752
    @petapeta752 6 ปีที่แล้ว +397

    Teacher: A bullet can travel at 300 miles per second
    Students: how fast is that?
    Teacher: about 2 and a half American football fields

    • @sidneysoup5969
      @sidneysoup5969 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I thought it was 3 and a half, my bad:(

    • @pi2z806
      @pi2z806 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      300 miles per second? dang

    • @RenTheGreat
      @RenTheGreat 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Pi2z more like bang.

    • @pi2z806
      @pi2z806 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      lol

    • @chricechiu3673
      @chricechiu3673 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I don't think a bullet is that fast as the velocity needed to enter space is only 5 miles a second. What you mean is probably 300 metres a second.

  • @jackeverett1023
    @jackeverett1023 7 ปีที่แล้ว +629

    I'm American and I'm not even offended
    this was beautiful 😂

    • @black-op345gaming5
      @black-op345gaming5 7 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      No one should be offend (cause it's all jokes and stereotypes)

    • @ananimationfan2729
      @ananimationfan2729 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Same

    • @User-xw6kd
      @User-xw6kd 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      most were actually positive things

    • @venomtang
      @venomtang 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      😂👌

    • @man-zv3zf
      @man-zv3zf 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Jade F. There is u. And then there are other people. You are the type of people people want around

  • @deepblue1987
    @deepblue1987 4 ปีที่แล้ว +486

    Im American and i find this...
    Completely accurate

    • @romancorey6796
      @romancorey6796 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Same!!

    • @kaiden9226
      @kaiden9226 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Same lmao

    • @chandlerscadden6717
      @chandlerscadden6717 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Except bald eagle part and accents pretty much

    • @echsemia
      @echsemia 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@chandlerscadden6717 wdym that part was completely accurate

    • @brycewhalen8521
      @brycewhalen8521 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yeah boiiis

  • @CBCFilms
    @CBCFilms 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1109

    You forgot about breakfast. Bacon, bacon, bacon, some more bacon, a .50 cal round, bacon.

    • @whovianwolf
      @whovianwolf 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      You missed that the fact that most of America descended from us great British people on the other side of the Atlantic and that we are the better country and should rule over the US again but giving them the supposed power to vote for their rights so they don't disobey and try to gain independence from the superior united Kingdom.
      Jk Jk being honest I would love to move to America for the big trucks and second amendment but your healthcare system needs improvement and I would have the union flag up instead of the stars and stripes

    • @CBCFilms
      @CBCFilms 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      whovian wolf, hahaha! And don't forget that everyone here thinks their penis is bigger than an aircraft carrier! (Yes, even the women) 😂😂

    • @CBCFilms
      @CBCFilms 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Dragoon Z, Amen to bacon!

    • @theofficialexpert
      @theofficialexpert 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      CCVFX - Cousteau Christopher VFX I'm on a kosher diet

    • @tommyg2543
      @tommyg2543 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      CCVFX - Cousteau Christopher VFX and sausage, big , thick, sausage.

  • @georgerodriguez2625
    @georgerodriguez2625 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1118

    I love celebrating Tuesday!

    • @stormthewolf4467
      @stormthewolf4467 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      SAME

    • @iamsueshii8529
      @iamsueshii8529 6 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I’m the only American who doesn’t know what happens on Tuesday

    • @JCBidoof
      @JCBidoof 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      It's da best holiday

    • @MrToasty4
      @MrToasty4 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      SAME

    • @jennyknopps1291
      @jennyknopps1291 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @ClassicFreak Umm No, the best Holiday would be Friday Night.

  • @kaiterich3336
    @kaiterich3336 5 ปีที่แล้ว +459

    Ok the accents cracked me up😂 cause it’s so true. My dads from Boston and that’s how he speaks and my moms from the south and that’s how me and her speak. 100% accurate 😂🇺🇸

    • @marshallboice6871
      @marshallboice6871 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yeah but they forgot to use fenway pak in every sentence

    • @gh0stly870
      @gh0stly870 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hawaii is also very accurate. Lived here for 3 years and every local talks like that.

    • @redbrixanimations
      @redbrixanimations 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Kaite Rich except California. I’ve lived here for 12 years and I have yet to hear someone talk like that

    • @gan3651
      @gan3651 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I’m Minnesotan and do not talk like that at all

    • @ayesp6188
      @ayesp6188 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@redbrixanimations unless you're in LA

  • @scorptile3137
    @scorptile3137 5 ปีที่แล้ว +427

    When you were naming the states you forgot to say
    Minnesota: the state that wants to be just like Canada

    • @inactiveaccount6884
      @inactiveaccount6884 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Minnesota: The Grand Theft Auto Online version of Canada without passive mode.

    • @super-ju9ew
      @super-ju9ew 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      and Wisconsin the cheese and beer state

    • @super-ju9ew
      @super-ju9ew 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      The Canada state

    • @liferestarter2.043
      @liferestarter2.043 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Canada, but it's American

    • @juliancastillo9570
      @juliancastillo9570 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Being from minnesota, i can confirm this

  • @commissar_3795
    @commissar_3795 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1085

    >Says drive a tank
    >shows a Canadian tank

    • @gregorsamsa52
      @gregorsamsa52 5 ปีที่แล้ว +59

      I see you are man of history as well

    • @abisairuiz8312
      @abisairuiz8312 5 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      glad im not the only one who noticed it

    • @villa1n663
      @villa1n663 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      lol

    • @Corsair872
      @Corsair872 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Yeah it’s the M5 Grizzly

    • @riograndelocos9639
      @riograndelocos9639 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      The cheapest one

  • @umenja6312
    @umenja6312 7 ปีที่แล้ว +373

    I stubbed my toe once, and it hurt for like a month, so I went to the doctor. I had to pay about $5,000 US.
    I wish I was joking.

    • @ATR2400-2
      @ATR2400-2 7 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      wait really?

    • @lovatojonasfan1
      @lovatojonasfan1 7 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Mother Greece Sounds like you broke it.

    • @icecubedirectorofshield6636
      @icecubedirectorofshield6636 7 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Yeaaah, bullshit.

    • @karhadd
      @karhadd 7 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Bullshit

    • @mygetawayart
      @mygetawayart 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      +Karam X you wish
      But as always, better this way than single payer, as the idiots say

  • @mimimarcus
    @mimimarcus 9 ปีที่แล้ว +67

    Step 29: Own a Costco membership.
    Step 30: Be grumpy for not yet having coffee in the morning.
    Step 31: Overpay for coffee at Starbucks.
    Step 32: Obsess over social parasites such as Kim Kardashian while disrespecting honest hard working professionals such as teachers.
    I could go on and on...

    • @mimimarcus
      @mimimarcus 9 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      ***** Yes, Sam's Club! It could be my Step 33: Shop at Walmart and Sam's Club to support evil corporations that shipped jobs oversea.

    • @HawOfSteel
      @HawOfSteel 9 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      BJ's cause that should be sold at wholesale!

    • @brookeworm18
      @brookeworm18 9 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yes. I approve.

    • @BranGrizz
      @BranGrizz 9 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      nah, you need to disrespect teachers all day. their unions, tenure, and apathy for children is a true travesty. they're the sole reason why our education is literally the worst out of all developed nations.

    • @offroad6901
      @offroad6901 9 ปีที่แล้ว

      Brandon Clark true

  • @hollowhoagie6441
    @hollowhoagie6441 4 ปีที่แล้ว +50

    3:06 *M'am that's quite the harry leg ya got there*

  • @lukevertin
    @lukevertin 7 ปีที่แล้ว +406

    As an American I say that this is pretty accurate

    • @itsthreat5057
      @itsthreat5057 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Luke Vertin except the boob and the tank part

    • @davidjordan5882
      @davidjordan5882 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Its Threat that and i live in the south we dont all talk like that geeze i know its a joke but comon do you honestly think that the accent in the south is that thick

    • @foolst0p
      @foolst0p 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      omg, this is supposed to be a joke

    • @bwhin2873
      @bwhin2873 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Thats right boy! Freaking 'Murica!!! We speak' Murican!

    • @kdrapertrucker
      @kdrapertrucker 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Luke Vertin well except for the disguising yourself overseas. And while the medicine is expensive, at least you don't have to wait 8 months to get in to see the doctor.

  • @MeatyBoyUnofficial
    @MeatyBoyUnofficial 5 ปีที่แล้ว +194

    "If you don't have an American flag in your front yard, you must be a commie."
    That made me laugh more than I have all this month. I'm not sure why, but thank you. :)

    • @stiffbuckets2511
      @stiffbuckets2511 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      X the Pineapple heheheeee

    • @peopleperson2387
      @peopleperson2387 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Well I guess I’m a communist now... well shit. It’s not like my yard is rocks anyway.

    • @thatonekid8119
      @thatonekid8119 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I’m also a commie

    • @thatonekid8119
      @thatonekid8119 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      FrostProZone Gamer 21 wait really?

    • @thatonekid8119
      @thatonekid8119 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      wow

  • @jcliff8415
    @jcliff8415 5 ปีที่แล้ว +98

    3:18 the most accurate of them all...

    • @ThatOneKimi
      @ThatOneKimi 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Yes.

    • @jakelibo8721
      @jakelibo8721 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Of course! It's the American way.

    • @csilc5897
      @csilc5897 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes

    • @abandonedchannel72929
      @abandonedchannel72929 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      MURICA 🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷

    • @theemperor-wh40k18
      @theemperor-wh40k18 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@abandonedchannel72929 nice flag of Liberia you got there.

  • @LadyRobertaL
    @LadyRobertaL 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Hearing Canadians speak in different US regional accents is my new favorite thing!!!I love it!!!

  • @nintendonerd4729
    @nintendonerd4729 8 ปีที่แล้ว +366

    you forgot that all Americans say 'MURICA FUCK YEAH

    • @doltish3126
      @doltish3126 8 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Yes, as an American, we do say that a lot.
      Before breakfast: MURICA, FUCK YEAH
      Lunch: MURICA
      McDonald's: MURICA
      Night Club: MURICA!! FCKING YEAH!!

    • @nintendonerd4729
      @nintendonerd4729 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Doing drugs:'MURICA FUCK YEAH
      also i am American

    • @doltish3126
      @doltish3126 8 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      +NintendoNerd Taking our bald eagle for a walk: MURICA FCK YA!!
      Good job being America

    • @nintendonerd4729
      @nintendonerd4729 8 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      thanks bro (takes big gulp of beer while walking out of 7 eleven) 'MURICA FUCK YEAH

    • @crashdreamz9144
      @crashdreamz9144 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      NintendoNerd yeah, well you forgot your other quotation

  • @brendanpham79
    @brendanpham79 8 ปีที่แล้ว +106

    Calling football soccer is how to be an american.

    • @kylem1112
      @kylem1112 8 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      canadians call it soccer too.

    • @Yo5463
      @Yo5463 8 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      +kylem1112 Doesn't make it any less disagreeable.

    • @wankuscrankus7755
      @wankuscrankus7755 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      calling any sport "football" is simply sport centric. association football, rugby football and gridiron football are all football. either use the full name or call it something else.

    • @kylem1112
      @kylem1112 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Wankus Crankus
      THANK YOU! jesus christ people are such fucking idiots. there's canadian football, australian football american football, all not related to "association football" (soccer). the day that people stop bitching about using the term"football" and it's usage is when i will start to believe in a god.

  • @kierawarner6894
    @kierawarner6894 6 ปีที่แล้ว +382

    1:52
    Me an American: That fLAG SHOULD NOT BE TOUCHING THE GROUND

    • @divinehazrd
      @divinehazrd 6 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      Kiera Warner Ikr. I was thinking the same thing. But then i got distracted with his commie joke.

    • @kierawarner6894
      @kierawarner6894 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Lil Slightly Bigger Nugget I said an American...

    • @capitalsfan7413
      @capitalsfan7413 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Kiera Warner, USA USA USA

    • @drakecolwell6205
      @drakecolwell6205 6 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Kiera Warner yeah your right even if there not American they should still be conscious about that

    • @strawberryeclipse920
      @strawberryeclipse920 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Yeah it's disrespectful in America 😡

  • @chunkbmx6639
    @chunkbmx6639 4 ปีที่แล้ว +49

    In Colorado, we don't just have mountains, we also have weed

  • @robertschalk2
    @robertschalk2 8 ปีที่แล้ว +179

    that super size is a medium or large

    • @Lucas-po6mn
      @Lucas-po6mn 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Medium

    • @robertschalk2
      @robertschalk2 8 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      +Lucas I wasn't asking I was stating

  • @scrampledegg-nj1bj
    @scrampledegg-nj1bj 5 ปีที่แล้ว +663

    wait, Canada exists?

    • @JustAHat
      @JustAHat 5 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      no

    • @celenanowak9143
      @celenanowak9143 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      What Canada

    • @kevinzhong5496
      @kevinzhong5496 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      When I was little I thought that everyone lived in Canada 😂

    • @owenfulkerson7291
      @owenfulkerson7291 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I know! I thought it was a mythical land. Like Narnia.

    • @gh0stly870
      @gh0stly870 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      PFFT! No.

  • @annnnnnnn394
    @annnnnnnn394 5 ปีที่แล้ว +374

    Use the word "like" in like every sentence like as much as possible, because it's not like anyone could be, you know like offended when you like a word like "like" so much. 🙄
    😂😂😂

    • @feartheghus
      @feartheghus 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Admittedly that’s only a Californian thing for the most part, that and anyone who is always high, but there’s so much overlap between those groups it’s hard to tell.

    • @YOLO-nx3xy
      @YOLO-nx3xy 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Kyle Roczniak shaggy be like:

    • @shuie.
      @shuie. 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      sweating nerveously* Hah, it's not a Californian thing....

    • @feartheghus
      @feartheghus 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      yeaaah boi it is solely a California thing.

    • @shuie.
      @shuie. 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@feartheghus come on we don't say like, like a lot- oh wait...

  • @gustavbiehl6550
    @gustavbiehl6550 4 ปีที่แล้ว +189

    Step 28: You need to own a truck to live in America

    • @_souldier
      @_souldier 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      and put american flags in the back of it

    • @rawleighsellers4525
      @rawleighsellers4525 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      This is 1000% accruate

    • @yourneighborhoodwierdo8349
      @yourneighborhoodwierdo8349 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@_souldier and have a sticker of every military branch on it

    • @abandonedchannel72929
      @abandonedchannel72929 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@rawleighsellers4525 *1776%

    • @_Https.maddie
      @_Https.maddie 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      If you don’t have a truck with a flag are you really American????? I don’t think so

  • @chipmunklukeskywalker6914
    @chipmunklukeskywalker6914 5 ปีที่แล้ว +739

    I found this very offensive i'm going to sue you for $7,500,000...

    • @grandmahumpguy5493
      @grandmahumpguy5493 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      ArE yOu SuRe AbOuT DaT

    • @mudput8441
      @mudput8441 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Yes

    • @gracewang6334
      @gracewang6334 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Great.

    • @btdpro752
      @btdpro752 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Have feminist ever sued people for being offensive? Thats is scary

    • @tonystark341
      @tonystark341 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Oh you can try, but lawyers don't work for free 💰💰💰

  • @cosmiczyx8428
    @cosmiczyx8428 5 ปีที่แล้ว +43

    You missed: "complain about how your drink takes too long at Starbucks even though you ordered the most extra shit ever, don't forget to not tip!"

  • @doczero1296
    @doczero1296 5 ปีที่แล้ว +919

    Step 29: Call football soccer

    • @numberq1134
      @numberq1134 5 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      Wrong. Soccer is an enjoyable sport played around the world, football is disappointing halftime shows

    • @gh0stly870
      @gh0stly870 5 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      @@numberq1134 They're not talking about American football... In other countries, soccer is called "football".

    • @wornmean1922
      @wornmean1922 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Step 29.5 explain how football is better than soccer

    • @numberq1134
      @numberq1134 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@gh0stly870 Nah man, I understand that, I'm just referencing the Superbowl halftime show. Now that I read my comment again, it didn't really make sense...

    • @gh0stly870
      @gh0stly870 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@numberq1134 Oh, okay.

  • @eliseerickson5994
    @eliseerickson5994 4 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    the hawaiian accent was so accurate i spit out my drink

  • @caxul3777
    @caxul3777 6 ปีที่แล้ว +85

    McDonalds...lots of McDonalds...

  • @MrTheblackopsdude
    @MrTheblackopsdude 7 ปีที่แล้ว +197

    To be honest, this is accurate.

    • @jmitterii2
      @jmitterii2 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Most of it. Except now when we say ""Mericu!" it's a joke, a meme.
      We know we're a fucking collapsing empire, as they all go, and while we go we're a fucking joke.
      The flag thing is a bit overdone though.

  • @marinafm8932
    @marinafm8932 6 ปีที่แล้ว +82

    3:06
    That’s a hairy woman

    • @hsuhorn
      @hsuhorn 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      GardenMoon she forgot to shave lol

    • @mickeythedogo703
      @mickeythedogo703 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      You're offending an American woman ! Imma sue you for 7M dollars ! *You'Re DiSrEspEctIng tHE uSA !*

    • @TuRTLe-CrepZdar
      @TuRTLe-CrepZdar 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      USA! USA! USA!

    • @doswheelsbetter8292
      @doswheelsbetter8292 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Haven't you heard? Men can be women now you racist, sexist, misogynistic, homophobe!

    • @marcusv9691
      @marcusv9691 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hahhahaha

  • @KrispyKitty66
    @KrispyKitty66 4 ปีที่แล้ว +42

    California is accurate, just need to say “like” and “totally” in every sentence

    • @TheIHVPNetwork
      @TheIHVPNetwork 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      😂like totally untrue not dude!!

  • @MarspeedCars
    @MarspeedCars 8 ปีที่แล้ว +703

    Bruh was that a man was giving birth! Wtf

    • @xtrememusic1732
      @xtrememusic1732 7 ปีที่แล้ว +57

      maybe that's just a hairy woman

    • @taliii8609
      @taliii8609 7 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Or a transvestite

    • @hugoharington263
      @hugoharington263 6 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Marspeed bro men can give birth! You regressive pig!

    • @sarahbenedict4338
      @sarahbenedict4338 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      That's America for you!😁

    • @kodamasdad9562
      @kodamasdad9562 6 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      DID YOU JUST ASSUME THEIR GENDER REEEEEEEEEE

  • @MichaelJesse
    @MichaelJesse 6 ปีที่แล้ว +427

    I'm an American... I never realized that paying for things with credit cards is considered weird in other countries XD

    • @jessalalacross239
      @jessalalacross239 6 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      Michael Jesse I live in Canada, and at work (I work at McDonald’s), most people pay using their bank debit cards or cash. For small transactions (anything under $5), I’ve had people apologize to me for not having cash on them

    • @annaanna6580
      @annaanna6580 6 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      The point is,They were saying that Americans always are using their credit card.Its not weird in other countries.

    • @All.textures.stylist
      @All.textures.stylist 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Michael Jesse is it weird?

    • @sylfixplayz2142
      @sylfixplayz2142 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I'm personally Canadian and a lot of people use cash to pay lol

    • @rishacici3366
      @rishacici3366 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Michael Jesse this guy is rude! He called the Canada "weird"? Ok fine,Canada is weird but the USA is a rude,have no respect and doesn't know how to discipline their children.canadians are weird YES but they are "POLITE,VERY FRIENDLY,and VERY HELPFUL,and they are always saying sorry for everything and I know it's boring but that's a very good thing,but Americans doesn't want to say "sorry",they are just going to curse at them and not say sorry,so please be patient,canadians are more good than the Americans ok...

  • @LogansDarling
    @LogansDarling 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1214

    McDonalds.

    • @No_timezone77
      @No_timezone77 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Logan Darling true that

    • @SoleShiester
      @SoleShiester 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Aaron Glisson if you like steroid meat

    • @bear11344
      @bear11344 6 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Walmart.

    • @moreaugaspard4893
      @moreaugaspard4893 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Ur so funny wow , i love u , u dicj

    • @kodamasdad9562
      @kodamasdad9562 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Logan Darling but Canadians love McDonald's just as much (if not more) than Americans

  • @ryebrooks2205
    @ryebrooks2205 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    "Okay I know what Australia is, but what the HECK is Dubai?" The way it abruptly cut off made me laugh too much

    • @jaddyd424
      @jaddyd424 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      I wish they could’ve given Scooter more screen time. He’s so funny!

  • @Caleb-bp8bm
    @Caleb-bp8bm 7 ปีที่แล้ว +73

    "Of corse I'm free, THIS IS AMERICA!!!"

    • @duckiesae
      @duckiesae 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Caleb N. are u American?

    • @emilynichole7222
      @emilynichole7222 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Caleb N. omg i was scrolling through the comments and saw this and thought "where tf did this even come from they haven't said that yet" then I look up and hear it 😂

  • @bandicootface5593
    @bandicootface5593 6 ปีที่แล้ว +555

    I'm an American this is 127% accurate and if that's bad statistics don't blame me blame our education system

    • @plutoporn
      @plutoporn 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Where tf do u live

    • @happypill5386
      @happypill5386 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Fucking commi

    • @friedrichnietzsche9767
      @friedrichnietzsche9767 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Education and adoption system and healthcare system and electoral college system brocc

    • @nylawilliams3420
      @nylawilliams3420 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Incorrect

    • @friedrichnietzsche9767
      @friedrichnietzsche9767 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@nylawilliams3420 This comment was not political at all both obamacare and this new plan aare broken so i3 mean you could give an argument to how it is wrong but you just said inncorrect are you like 5 or something

  • @KazLordOfLightWarriors
    @KazLordOfLightWarriors 8 ปีที่แล้ว +810

    You missed the fact that you have to drink at least one beer a day

    • @swarm9337
      @swarm9337 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Nahh here in Texas it's whisky

    • @8maxthemax8
      @8maxthemax8 8 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Lol, Americans thinking they drink a lot!

    • @swarm9337
      @swarm9337 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      +Maxim T Potvin Texan with parents from Ireland I drink more than the average person lmao

    • @8maxthemax8
      @8maxthemax8 8 ปีที่แล้ว

      Swarm More than Americans in general, that's my point!

    • @originalcharacterplznostea2749
      @originalcharacterplznostea2749 8 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      You mean Canadian water?

  • @adamneulander
    @adamneulander 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    "So you're from the state of Canada?" - DMV employee

  • @VulcanTrekkie45
    @VulcanTrekkie45 7 ปีที่แล้ว +50

    Also, vehemently hate everyone not from your home state and/or region. For no reason.

    • @dazaipetals
      @dazaipetals 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Spencer O'Dowd ikr😂😂😂

    • @chainsawmay
      @chainsawmay 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      NORTH CAROLINA IS MYCH BETTET THAN SOUTH CAROLINA THO. ITS BETTER ON TOP.

  • @veganfrybread
    @veganfrybread 6 ปีที่แล้ว +87

    woah alaska actually made it into the video??

    • @josephd53
      @josephd53 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      What the hell is alaska? Is it an ice cream store or something?

    • @jj-hf8jy
      @jj-hf8jy 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@josephd53 im pretty sure youre american ;))

    • @rammez
      @rammez 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Alabama? Is that in New York?

  • @datboyjo2617
    @datboyjo2617 5 ปีที่แล้ว +228

    I mean, he’s not wrong

    • @moxifica1924
      @moxifica1924 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      But he did forget that wyoming Is not a state.

    • @emjoi_joiemoni
      @emjoi_joiemoni 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      He is over doing it.😂

    • @dandy2824
      @dandy2824 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      bacara18 how

    • @buddybonbutt7510
      @buddybonbutt7510 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Except for when he is

  • @therealkingjack8715
    @therealkingjack8715 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    How many other Americans found out they were living American wrong?

    • @shyryTsr2k
      @shyryTsr2k 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Same fam, I don't drive a tank... I'm very disappointed in myself 😞

    • @kedarrana2747
      @kedarrana2747 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@shyryTsr2k do you keep guns all over your body?😂

    • @_Https.maddie
      @_Https.maddie 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@kedarrana2747 u dont????

    • @nowhatrice8568
      @nowhatrice8568 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      same

  • @deathnotelrox
    @deathnotelrox 10 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    I remember when I turned 13, I got my first bald eagle. My eagle ceremony was average, but because of my July 4th birthday, the national anthem brought not one, but two eagles, Freedom and Liberty. Together, we chanted the Pledge of Allegence and shot three bears with our fourth semiautomatics. afterwards, we all enjoyed our apple pie next to the soothing fireworks where my Uncle Sam got hurt and sued the fireworks company.

  • @mladue2
    @mladue2 5 ปีที่แล้ว +95

    I love how he's chanting USA while there's a GUY giving birth😂😂

    • @warpartyattheoutpost4987
      @warpartyattheoutpost4987 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      *how dare you assume the birth giver's gender*

    • @jakelibo8721
      @jakelibo8721 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Americans love to assume gender. lol

    • @rawleighsellers4525
      @rawleighsellers4525 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Like leterily that is such a steryotype

    • @triclopsgamer5934
      @triclopsgamer5934 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      3:05 OMG That's the hairiest pregnant woman I'v ever seen!!!

    • @mladue2
      @mladue2 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@rawleighsellers4525 i know im late but god i hope you were kidding

  • @aaronlandry3934
    @aaronlandry3934 7 ปีที่แล้ว +553

    My God! Those accents are atrocious!

    • @helencui7960
      @helencui7960 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      That's so true.

    • @jinjysbro
      @jinjysbro 7 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      He totally mastered the hawaiian one.

    • @bruh-bd1tr
      @bruh-bd1tr 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hahhhhhhhvad yaaaahhhhhhd

    • @bruh-bd1tr
      @bruh-bd1tr 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yahhhhhhh buoston accent was Also funny

    • @Ronakvevo
      @Ronakvevo 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      his texas accent sounded australian

  • @bbybih3893
    @bbybih3893 4 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    I'm Canadian and my best friend is American, I'm going to hell for sending her this 😂😂

  • @touchgamer3698
    @touchgamer3698 6 ปีที่แล้ว +47

    "Ok I Know what Australia Is, But what the HECK is Dubai" Dubai is where i currently live. also i want that quote repeated 100 times because its so funny

    • @Kay_213_
      @Kay_213_ 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Don’t worry, we know what Dubai is
      It’s totally a country.

  • @armorfid
    @armorfid 10 ปีที่แล้ว +54

    Also:
    - Eat beef. Lots of it. Doesn't matter how or when; the more, the better.
    - Drive a pickup or SUV. The more gallons per mile, the more 'Murican.
    - If you get in an argument with someone, involve 9/11. Winning is guaranteed.

  • @KatzrCynthia
    @KatzrCynthia 8 ปีที่แล้ว +136

    You forgot that to be American you must love fried things

    • @robdavidson4649
      @robdavidson4649 8 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      +KatzrCynthia Are you sure you're not talking about Scotland?

    • @KatzrCynthia
      @KatzrCynthia 8 ปีที่แล้ว

      +Rob Davidson ehh I'm pretty sure but I may be wrong :)

    • @theoptimisticmetalhead7787
      @theoptimisticmetalhead7787 8 ปีที่แล้ว

      Look up the Texas State Fair. Trust me, she means the US.

    • @BIGGIED1000
      @BIGGIED1000 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Everybody loves fried things

    • @KatzrCynthia
      @KatzrCynthia 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      oh yeah deep fried things

  • @gregoryliv
    @gregoryliv 5 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    Tuesday’s are for tacos!

  • @benhahn7105
    @benhahn7105 6 ปีที่แล้ว +63

    Bank loans? Credit Card!

    • @bikerider1007
      @bikerider1007 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Ben Hahn yep. Today i saw man at the post office pay 0.63 for a letter with a credit card.

  • @Hunter12396
    @Hunter12396 10 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    1:23 that's a Canadian tank, and you call yourself an Ameriacn

    • @Hunter12396
      @Hunter12396 10 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      oh and step 29: start wars with EVERYBODY, even if there completely innocent

    • @elschmiddo
      @elschmiddo 10 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Hunter12396
      you mean they're...

    • @michaelrutkowski7265
      @michaelrutkowski7265 10 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hunter12396 So the Taliban are innocent?

    • @fordprefectiii
      @fordprefectiii 10 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hunter12396 we went to war with the Taliban too. No, not everybody is innocent. Oh, yes, we declared war on Germany ... twice ... before the 'Muricans did.

    • @elschmiddo
      @elschmiddo 10 ปีที่แล้ว

      I can't follow your thinking. Please explain just a little more what you are trying to say.

  • @justingrant4860
    @justingrant4860 6 ปีที่แล้ว +285

    highly offended..... america was only said 76 times this video is 5 min long!!!!

    • @travisabt6805
      @travisabt6805 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Justin Grant should have been 1774 times

    • @pi2z806
      @pi2z806 6 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      1776 idiot

    • @danyamozdzen591
      @danyamozdzen591 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Americans.... ignorant and proud 😂😂😂

    • @pi2z806
      @pi2z806 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      how are we ignorant? it's obviously a joke

    • @hitman6787
      @hitman6787 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Pi2z your more stupid then ignorant. Canadians marched right into the US and burnt down your white house and marched right back during the war of 1812, and Americans didn't do much to stop them.

  • @samuelgall8019
    @samuelgall8019 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    7 years later and this video is still 100% accurate 😂

  • @turtletail313
    @turtletail313 6 ปีที่แล้ว +386

    Alaska: Western Canada
    Umm, actually I think Canada is Eastern Alaska. Keep your facts straight

    • @jelly3050
      @jelly3050 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Canada is its own country and so is Alasska we are not eastern Alaska I'm sorry if this offends you

    • @southern2532
      @southern2532 5 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      @@jelly3050 r/wooooooooooooopsh

    • @randommandoade1465
      @randommandoade1465 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@jelly3050 Alaska is a State i know cuz I live there

    • @saby568
      @saby568 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@jelly3050 it twaz a joke. Unless if ur being sarcastic

    • @crayonburry
      @crayonburry 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@randommandoade1465 dont you mean here (how dare you offend grammar rules)

  • @nsebinyang
    @nsebinyang 7 ปีที่แล้ว +106

    you forgot the fireworks on Friday

    • @mcprol2467
      @mcprol2467 7 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      And at 4pm.

    • @butter_weird
      @butter_weird 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      The only time people are doing fireworks are on july 4th and new years

  • @jamesmcarthur9138
    @jamesmcarthur9138 7 ปีที่แล้ว +197

    4:06 England is a city

    • @lumarite9029
      @lumarite9029 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      James McArthur, England is a city in Arkansas

    • @WiredWalter
      @WiredWalter 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Lymxa Arkansas doesnt exist

  • @Slowmodem1
    @Slowmodem1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Absolutely hilarious, y'all! I nearly fell out of my chair at "water board starter kit!" Beauty!

  • @hay11son67
    @hay11son67 7 ปีที่แล้ว +562

    Us Canadians aren't that nice
    Sorry for that

    • @bingboyify
      @bingboyify 6 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      i feel canadians are more serious than americans, just saying generally.

    • @bingboyify
      @bingboyify 6 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      yea I lived in both Canada and the US when I was in school. I feel Canadians might share more similarities to Europeans (especially British people) than Americans.

    • @andrewschmidt4969
      @andrewschmidt4969 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Kitty1234Cool i bet half of americans use there please and thank yous and are polite ive seen so many that have been so i cannot understand your reasoning

    • @jotario4344
      @jotario4344 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Your not that nice

    • @225savage0
      @225savage0 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hay11soN nope. yall are disrespectfull, judgemental and also pretty dumb. ive been to canada 1 time and it sucked. yall hardly have anything there. and i dont pay for my shit with a credit card. i work 50 hours a week and my bank account has plenty.

  • @Ironwalrus8989
    @Ironwalrus8989 8 ปีที่แล้ว +116

    Those were terrible American accents

    • @dakotafawson1223
      @dakotafawson1223 8 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      The Boston one literally gave me chlamydia

    • @dakotafawson1223
      @dakotafawson1223 8 ปีที่แล้ว

      The Boston one literally gave me chlamydia

    • @swarm9337
      @swarm9337 8 ปีที่แล้ว

      I've heard the southern one a lot here in Texas

    • @seaglassbc
      @seaglassbc 8 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      that.... that's the entire joke

    • @nightsbeatswitchgood
      @nightsbeatswitchgood 8 ปีที่แล้ว

      That's the point...

  • @irocthenation
    @irocthenation 9 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    My favourite is when Americans come to Canada on their Thanksgiving weekend and find it absolutely ridiculous that no restaurants in town are serving a turkey dinner. It's not Thanksgiving here, it's just Thursday.

    • @tommy2131234
      @tommy2131234 9 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Lol I didn't know that was a thing. But I could see that. #MDrepin #usa

    • @manningbartlett522
      @manningbartlett522 9 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Erin R I live in Sydney, and we've had Americans wondering why the 4th of July isn't a holiday.

    • @peeps211
      @peeps211 9 ปีที่แล้ว

      Erin R Thanksgiving weekend, yet it's thursday..?

    • @wesofx8148
      @wesofx8148 9 ปีที่แล้ว

      Oh shit... I never thought about that.

  • @monkii8874
    @monkii8874 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    As an American I can say this is 100% accurate.

  • @maggie7776
    @maggie7776 7 ปีที่แล้ว +45

    As an American I can confirm that this is a valid set of instructions

  • @AustinRyan2002
    @AustinRyan2002 7 ปีที่แล้ว +149

    You forgot that football is the only sport that matters

    • @Florida27Marlins
      @Florida27Marlins 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      The lonely Fapper How can you forget Baseball lol?? Yes boring to some, but still America's sport.

    • @jaydenrichards6767
      @jaydenrichards6767 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Brian Estelhomme oh they didn't forget. Baseball just sucks.

    • @shannonwarden4507
      @shannonwarden4507 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      being an American that likes hockey is hard because everyone talks about football and baseball

    • @hashimali4257
      @hashimali4257 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      The lonely Fapper yep

    • @jaydenrichards6767
      @jaydenrichards6767 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Go Hawks yeah go seahawks!

  • @turbske
    @turbske 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    always carry a cheeseburger in your back pocket in case you get a bit hungry

  • @ScooterMagruder
    @ScooterMagruder 10 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    WHAT #DAHECK IS DUBAI???

  • @jakethesnakelover
    @jakethesnakelover 7 ปีที่แล้ว +367

    Obesity, shotguns and burgers.

    • @jakethesnakelover
      @jakethesnakelover 7 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Also only say the America part of United States of America as the name of your country.
      And for good measure, be a diehard football fan. (Yes, I mean "American Football" not real football)

    • @zeperso9037
      @zeperso9037 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      branden it was a joke

    • @KanyeTheGayFish69
      @KanyeTheGayFish69 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      +jakethesnakelover you realise "real football" is called soccer in canada, and gridiron football (american and canadian) is called football there. in australia European football is called soccer as well.

    • @williamozell-landry7492
      @williamozell-landry7492 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      DJ TidalWave "just" 😂😂

    • @itsthreat5057
      @itsthreat5057 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      DJ TidalWave actually 2/3 of America is fat

  • @sunthismarch
    @sunthismarch 8 ปีที่แล้ว +294

    YOU MAY NOT SHOP AT TARGET
    THERE IS ONLY WALMART
    WALMART KNOWS ALL

    • @Polioooo0
      @Polioooo0 8 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      +Hazel Nut Walmart has everything...

    • @kahlernygard809
      @kahlernygard809 8 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      +Hazel Nut Walmart is for the plebs, target reigns supreme in Minnesota

    • @sunthismarch
      @sunthismarch 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      If you live in Wisconsin, you may as well call it Walmart.

    • @kahlernygard809
      @kahlernygard809 8 ปีที่แล้ว

      Chibi Chan cool story bro

    • @kahlernygard809
      @kahlernygard809 8 ปีที่แล้ว

      Chibi Chan pissed?

  • @elmashable9722
    @elmashable9722 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    “Do they have Oil” I am concerned of my society asking this hard hitting AMERICANNN Question

  • @dacoconutnut9503
    @dacoconutnut9503 5 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    Me: "oh nice I'm definetly travelling to Florida one day"
    Also me: *sees **3:53*
    Me: "oh, nevermind"

  • @justlily1209
    @justlily1209 7 ปีที่แล้ว +541

    It's actually illegal to own a bald eagle in America

    • @nIcholasbrAdy287
      @nIcholasbrAdy287 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Thekman26 exactly

    • @krasykay2294
      @krasykay2294 7 ปีที่แล้ว +79

      even more reason to own one! i fight for my freedom to own a freedom bird

    • @michealkarvelas5762
      @michealkarvelas5762 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      i was about to say that

    • @arbitor528
      @arbitor528 7 ปีที่แล้ว +69

      because you can't own FREEDOM

    • @arbitor528
      @arbitor528 7 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      when somebody lives in america and breaks the law then yes there freedom is taken away with good reason. I don't want a serial killer having freedom

  • @simultaneouslyimuserfriend1476
    @simultaneouslyimuserfriend1476 5 ปีที่แล้ว +114

    You forgot to add: Make sure to eat LOTS and LOTS of junk food, and LOTS of sugary sweets!
    (And also to make sure to not spell correctly at all in any situation whatsoever)
    I'm going to hell for this, I know...

    • @kingkairos2437
      @kingkairos2437 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Am America. Can’t spell.

    • @feartheghus
      @feartheghus 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Unless you think we spell incorrectly because you’re British I don’t get that statement.

    • @billymanson1790
      @billymanson1790 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      I is a american and I is good at speling and me gramer

    • @leviphilippines5588
      @leviphilippines5588 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Have your *PAYCHEQUE*
      Lovely, I can't spell in American.

    • @billymanson1790
      @billymanson1790 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Jessica Cookie it’s spelt pay check

  • @zainabali1233
    @zainabali1233 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    HOW TO BE AMERICAN:
    ~your favorite song is now the national anthem~
    hahaha i died

  • @Lil_Punk
    @Lil_Punk 5 ปีที่แล้ว +86

    He forgot
    : getting drunk all the time and complaining about everything
    : hookers, strippers and slot machines.
    Home state NEVADA!!

    • @theblabarmy
      @theblabarmy 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      The rest of nevada (other than las vegas) is a desert wasteland

    • @feartheghus
      @feartheghus 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      TheBlab Army not really but ok, that’s just the usual stupid thoughts of someone who lives either in Las Vegas or cities in California.

    • @WanderingLoner1
      @WanderingLoner1 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@feartheghus Nevada's a nice state

  • @wornmean1922
    @wornmean1922 5 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    Only thing you missed is our bacon and how much we love it

    • @Kylesb
      @Kylesb 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      WornMean 19 Peanut butter, too! And anything deep fried!

    • @wornmean1922
      @wornmean1922 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@Kylesb i forgot about them

    • @warpartyattheoutpost4987
      @warpartyattheoutpost4987 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      ... bacon at 4:20.

    • @3katfox
      @3katfox 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      We have Canadian bacon and it's better in every way 😁

  • @omersuliman8252
    @omersuliman8252 5 ปีที่แล้ว +565

    How to be American:
    Be born in America.

    • @mudput8441
      @mudput8441 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Wrong this is how to be an American: look up how to be an American

    • @emjoi_joiemoni
      @emjoi_joiemoni 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@mudput8441 no you have to be born here like me.

    • @haahahah28
      @haahahah28 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Who tf would want to be an american?

    • @sapientiamax
      @sapientiamax 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      hmmm.. I feel like im this person ;)

    • @persici9650
      @persici9650 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@haahahah28 True, I'm American and I don't want to be American lol

  • @pacificostudios
    @pacificostudios 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Today, I mentioned Manitoba to my neighbor, who moved from Louisiana to California. She had never heard of the place. I repeated the name a couple times. No dice. I grew up in Minnesota, so of course I know all about the Canadian provinces. At least BC, ONT, and all the three in between. Someday, I hope I get to visit Quebec and the Maritimes.

  • @small6887
    @small6887 6 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    Well first of all, we have 13,000 guns to represent the 13 original colonies. Second of all we have 50 eagles, to represent all the states, and third of all, Murcia.

    • @yeetusdeletus9193
      @yeetusdeletus9193 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      13,000 guns? Nope there are over 300 million guns in America.

  • @beliciapierre3538
    @beliciapierre3538 7 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    As an American I can confirm all of this

  • @roflcopter4388
    @roflcopter4388 9 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    If you're a Republican, you must listen to country music, drive a pickup truck, be able to recite the bible, watch NASCAR, and sleep with your cousins.

    • @swimmer8585
      @swimmer8585 9 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      If you're a liberal, you must chop your balls off. The rest will follow

    • @stephenhayden5448
      @stephenhayden5448 9 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Hey! We are the gun country. EMBRACE IT! Just shut up and buy a gun. I got myself a shotgun because it sounds cool. :D

    • @therealCodyCapps
      @therealCodyCapps 9 ปีที่แล้ว

      Ignorance is bliss

    • @clouster75
      @clouster75 9 ปีที่แล้ว

      ***** I am pretty sure you are.

    • @johnhughes361
      @johnhughes361 9 ปีที่แล้ว

      So true

  • @Arklay_98
    @Arklay_98 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    4:42 I literally said this to a friend today 😂

  • @delaneymontelli7913
    @delaneymontelli7913 6 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    Why did you bring up the Pledge Of Allegiance
    We had to sing it every day from kindergarten through high school
    Also thanks for mentioning Colorado we never get mentioned

    • @yeetusdeletus9193
      @yeetusdeletus9193 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yeah right, no one mentions Louisiana

    • @caesarvi1803
      @caesarvi1803 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Lol. Right!? I'm from Ohio😂

    • @hr8gyurg
      @hr8gyurg 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      What about New Hampshire?

    • @idrinkbleach1273
      @idrinkbleach1273 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      all I know is that I live in California and it sucks

    • @joym8830
      @joym8830 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Your mountains are beautiful