I once saw an auntie who was fearful of riding on the escalator and she was hesitating on whether to get on the escalator. Her daughter I suppose was beside, encouraging her to get on but she was still hesitant. I did not think twice, walked up, offered her my arm and helped her onto the escalator to ride down to the level below. Her daughter and her were very pleasantly surprised that I stepped up to help her and were thankful and I just replied “my pleasure “ to them and went on my way. I believe it is down to the individual, whether they want to make a difference in another’s lives in small mundane things. Being helpful and polite is a personal choice. 😊
okay here's something i would like to share. i am in my 60s. it's during my mid primary school that we converted to intergrated school where you can choose between english and chinese classes. some of the teachers then were educated by the british system an so they emphasize on "please/thank you/excuse me/etc" and like if you don't mind instead of Okay or not. but as time goes by teachers are homegrown and all the niceties and polite speeches are eroded and not taught or forgo. so these politeness are lost. replaced by short and sharp way of speech to get the point across effectively equates to efficency. sorry are my english is not good and grammas are all over the places...... did not understand them well during my school days and still not now....
@@jontytan good to have but then at times it's so hypocritical that people do away with it. i personally am old school so i am plentiful with my please and thank you... cultivated habits.
I understand what your friend means. I'm a born and bred Singaporean. I do notice the courtesy and politeness decline over the years. I deal with teenagers and young adults in my line of work. Very very rare these youngsters give way to me whenever we enter the classroom. They would rush in first either to catch the best seats or to enjoy the aircon. If they are already in the classroom, they dont stand up to greet me when I enter. Most times I have to initiate the greetings first before they reluctantly stand up to greet back. And there are many occasions where I have to repeat my greetings before they respond. At times I will bring snacks for them. If I don't tell them to queue for their share, it will turn into a mini brawl for a few of them. They'll rush to my table and grab as many as they can and leave without a thank you. There are many more instances I can share. It saddens me how simple courtesy is eroding especially with our younger generations. Makes me wonder. Don't their parents teach them? Or are their parents like that and the kids mirror the behaviour? 🤔
Interesting thoughts! The parent factor is one I am very interested in, particularly as a parent myself and an educator… I often wonder about the amount of screen time I see children experiencing and the amount of helper involvement (feeding kids who are old enough to feed themselves, but are too distracted watching a phone!)…
Thanks Jonty ... As a person who has been to Singapore a number of times as a tourist, I have never felt that there has ever been rudeness. From the retailers to people at the bus stop I've never experienced anything like that. If anything, there might be a quiet reservedness (lol, is that even a word?😊) but definitely nothing negative
How u know they are Singaporeans? As long as a human stand on Singapore soil, they are Singaporean? I walked out, 90% I see are foreigners from China, Malaysia, India, Myamar, Vietnam, Cambodia, Blangadesh...etc Someone from Britain complained to me when he tried to take the baby stroller thru MRT lift, all the Singaporeans never give way, he has to wait for the next lift. Ya ya ya... All the population n human u met in Singapore, are born n raised "Singaporeans". I thought my kind is gg extinct... didn't realize everyone in Singapore is Singaporeans and they are rude.
@@jontytan I think your topic should be "are people in Singapore rude? Why?" Try not to use Singaporeans, it means born n raised in Spore. Note that many hawkers are msians PR, customer service are work permit, employment pass. It doesn't represent me (3rd generation Singaporean). Singlish are efficient. Not every language need to follow "English" as the Golden standard. Melayu doesn't have alot of these niceties but yet it's one fo the most friendly n cozy language. The rudeness u see in Singapore doesn't represent us.
maybe... also bear in mind that I am 3rd gen Singaporean too.. just been away a long time. I also stated that I haven't experienced rudeness, but instead gave examples of interactions I have been a part of to explain why I think there are linguistic and cultural implications too... thank you for responding - appreciate the clarity.
Very perceptive insights. I moved from SG to Metro Vancouver Canada 20 years ago and have seen it evolve. Much of the progress of its social conscience can be attributed to its many public campaigns and education. Metro Vancouver, being the magnet for international immigrants, has allowed me to see how different education and cultural backgrounds influence social etiquette. Rudeness is subjective, and pivots on the individual’s perspective.
I love this and I think it's very consistent with what I shared too - that it is subjective and use of language is culture based. I wonder whether recipients need to be more open to the idea that people do not intend to be rude and assume positive intentions?
I’m Malaysian imo ppl in this region (Malaysia Singapore) generally take other people kindness as granted. We don’t really have the concept that people helped because they want to not they need to.
@@jontytan I mean something very casual like holding the door open for ppl or things like that. But ppl here expect u to do this kinda thing if u didn’t they get irritated, if u did most ppl not showing appreciation. It’s like I have a obligation to do ppl a favor rather than out of pure kindness
Its culture. Think about the word “can” and “ok”in Singlish, the number of meanings it has to make an appointment. “Sunday lunch? Ok!” Or “now can? Can!’ Instead of “Hi how are you? May I know if would you be free on Sunday to meet up for lunch? Sure, I’m free on Sunday. Thank you that’s great, I’ll see you then.’ 3 words is not rude but in fact polite, fast and straight to the point. Early migrants were illiterate, poor, hardly knew English except their native language or dialect. Schools have not always been taught in English, it was only LKY made it a standard I think in the 80s. Simple words that everyone understands quickly like ‘can’ and ‘ok’ or ‘what you want? Dabao (and point to food you want)’ worked wonders. When travelling or working with global people I avoid Singlish and use English to be understood. My partner is French and found me rude at first too but these days we talk and joke in a mix of broken French, Chinese, English, Italian and German. None with proper grammar between us but it works 😂 Btw great content and rude people exist in every country, Singapore is not immune nor perfect.
Love this comment. Thank you. Totally agree and appreciate your examples! I’m thinking I might do a follow up episode and include some of these thoughts! Thanks again!
Based on empirical exoerience, I felt that some of the younger gen dint have good etiquette, I taught a group of adult students who didn't really have courtesy and walked in and left the classroom for the day without informing the instructor. In most groups that I teach, students would greet the instructor as they come in, and would just let the instructor know, "hey I'm leaving for the day". They gave a cold and aloof vibe probably unknowingly. However, certain aunties and uncles were really polite to me in hawker centres.
@@jontytan Im guessing a more individuaistic culture and stiff competition might have something to do with it. Also influences from USA perhaps. I almost wanted to reprimand them , 'did not your parents teach you courtesy and etiqutte ' .. coz if they were my kids, i woulld be reprimanding them so that they became better persons.
just my thoughts. could it be they come in and left quietly so as not to cause disruptions to the class? would that be being polite or rude? just topic to ponder on.
@@bk7322 if that is the case they are being rude and was not taught manners..... i should say poor ubpringing. these values has been lost anyway from my observation. in my opinon.
Actually, she is right... I am Singaporean btw. I would often hold the lift for prople and no one said thank you..but having said that, Singaporeans in general are willing to help, when needed
Hmm...abrupt yes at times. Customer Service is poor, again at times, especially when shopping. Considering long days, hot days, and hours, many seem uninterested as the day progresses. I've actually walked out of a shop I was willing to spend in.
@@jontytan Companies and the gov. The environment they created. They seek rapid growth while neglecting quality. They treat ground workers as expendables and lowly. If locals dun do then replace with foreigners. if foreigners bad, replace with other foreigners. No training, no clear structure, no support system. Result in people having no pride in their job. Unlike japan or other countries. You can see they take pride in whatever they do be it cleaners,movers, drivers, etc. They rather fire and replace the employee rather than give a fair investigation/consequence/compensation.
Would it be accurate to say that the pursuit of saving money (or making money!) is causing us to be less kind? Perhaps taking less time to invest in people and wanting to see the return financially?
It’s quite a thought provoking few points you’ve brought up. Singaporeans have a tendency to be more abrupt due to our embracing of efficiency. It’s partly a fairly Chinese thing (I feel) and also because we are in a rush to get to where we want so this is brought to a higher degree. Then there is again the language issue. As a Mandarin speaker (barely), there isn’t as much in the way of “Please may I” and “If you wouldn’t mind” as in English. There are the niceties there but not as much as English, which is sometimes considered “flowery”. I was in Australia for my undergraduate studies and I loved that people took time to say hi when passing by in the street and even a “thank you” to the bus driver when alighting from the bus. While I’ve done the “thank you” to the bus driver, I’ve found myself struggling with a “Good morning, how are you?” when I go to order my meal at the uni canteen. I felt it was slowing things down for the people behind the counter and holding up the queue. As for your dad’s thoughts about the use of English, I share his opinion. Maybe the idea of a common language is buried in my subconscious but it’s more a case of me wanting to know what language to use. I’m terrible with code switching and hate having to fumble with languages when I speak to someone. I do love English. It’s my first language so I would bristle if someone insisted on me using Mandarin. I would do so if I know that the other person isn’t able to speak English and needs help but if I were to be very rudely demanded “Why can’t you speak Mandarin?”, (I haven’t yet got that) I would shoot back “This is Singapore, speak English!” As a child, Singapore was grappling with not just the four official languages here but also with the various dialects and minority languages, I really looked forward to the time where l, with increased English-medium education, everybody would be able to speak English and everybody _would_ be speaking English. Alas, this has not been the case for various reasons (one of them being the then-SBC deciding to go into locally-produced Mandarin TV shows instead of English ones). But the situation is better now than it has been. Let’s see where this discussion takes us to. Thanks for the observation and the prompting.
Thank you for your thoughts and comment - very insightful and I appreciate it a lot! I like your acknowledgement of the contrast in language - I really feel this is the most significant element to Singaporeans seeming rude, particularly to foreigners. One thing I had not considered until reading people's comments is the idea that Singaporeans are in a rush, or don't have time. Is the pace of life too fast? Do we need to slow down? Thanks again!
@@jontytan I don' t think Singaporeans are in a rush all the time; it is more about being considerate to those who are standing in line behind you. I live in the US and having grown up in SG, it really frustrates me when I see a cashier at grocery store chatting with customers when there was a line of people waiting to pay. But over the years I have developed the 'necessary' patience to survive here lol Other times, I 'd just just put my items back when I see the line was too long.
Interesting! If placed in the same position, would you feel awkward and try to close the conversation if there were people behind you? Thanks for sharing - appreciate it!
Just came back from Bali and Singapore. I would say Singaporeans aren't as courteous as Indonesians. Of course it's just generalisation. I bumped into some friendly Singaporeans for sure. However overall, Indonesians are more polite and friendly.
It’s more of a culture, and lifestyle stress that people tend to appear in a certain manner. While our country liberally brings in more people, we have to note that assimilation and cultural preservation need to be addressed properly too. It is not all just economic benefits and assume that things will fall in place nicely. Our government needs to improve on this area.
@@jontytan would you say big city congestion plays a part too? I mean apparently I hear in London people are more in a rush and hence are more likely to display aloofness, whilst out in the Home Counties the boomers and everyone is willing to say ‘how are you’ in the bus stop. Have you lived out in the Home Counties before? Also as a Brit it would be interesting to hear you discuss the topic of ‘classism and social class identities in Singapore’ which is a very contentious topic (arguably the most pressing one now) knowing you are brought up in a country where social class is very engrained in the British psyche. Though I’d argue that while class is more engrained in the UK, they are more honest about it being a problem and are paying lip service to improve it (e.g. Oxford uni students are trying to get more working class students in).
Big city congestion is a really interesting point. I grew up in the home counties and from town to town the sense of safety and kindness can vary a lot. Social classes is a very interesting one as I think they are much more blended in the UK whereas, despite being a much smaller country, here in Singapore many of us keep to our own - I mean, my grandma’s neighbourhood for example don’t really venture even to the local mall. Lots to consider from this comment - thank you!
Hi. I used to say "siam" in hokkien. My supervisor always scolds me for being rude. I always reply I only be practical. "Siam" only 1 sound while excuse me uses 3 sound. N I get my intentions across faster.
Efficiency! In these situations would you feel that you ought to adapt to communicate your feelings though words, or do you think your supervisor ought to understand the linguistic nuances in your response? Thank you!
As a New Zealander, who apologises to the person that bumps into me!!!! I think a bit of that may be your colleague too! We are returning to Singapore tomorrow, for 10 days on our way home, after 3 weeks in Hong Kong. We had a week in Singapore on the way. We have noticed, particularly on the teains here, that Singaporeans are so much more polite, no one stands for anyone on trains, not even a pregnant woman! Taxi drivers in Singapore are so chatty, on the whole, we have had amazing trips on taxis with great yarns being told. Cell phones, but as a youngster, we read books on buses! Great post Jonty.
That’s some wonderful observations! I am super glad to hear it! I’m very interested in intent vs impact as sometimes people choose to receive it negatively, or even somehow can’t hear it in any other way! Have the best time in Singapore! What are your must-do’s for the trip?
We have just been to the Raffles Marina Lighthouse, got there as an astonishing electrical storm and torrential rain started. We hope to be doing some of the nature walks, weather permitting. We are going to hire an bike. Will go to the new Bird Park, last night we were here the old one was about to close.😊
Of the 5 million plus population in Singapore, there are estimated 4 million plus Singapore citizens and permanent residents, among these 4 million plus, according to the year 2021 renowned Pew Research Survey findings results conducted on Singaporeans, there are 1 million Singaporean citizens and permanent residents that are former Malaysia-born Malaysians that migrated to Singapore. In S'pore among all the different countries new citizens and permanent residents, Malaysians are the largest group of new citizens and permanent residents.
I guess the issue here is that Jonty and his NZ friend is trying to apply their cultural norms on Singapore. Chinese Singaporeans normally only greet people that they know. In the west, your neighbor can sue you for negligence if they fall and injured in front of your gate without even telling u. Though, they greet u every morning. I guess it depends on what u want, no right or wrong. On speaking english, a big portion of older generation have not received formal education and frankly u should not expect them to speak English to U. The fact that they are trying to understand u means that they are making an effort. Try to speak Chinese in London and I am not sure what will happen. I guess when U are here you need ti assimilate yourself in the local culture. There is no perfect world, UK, NZ or any country.
I don't think I was trying to apply my own cultural norms, just to explore where this idea comes from. In fact, I did also align with your thoughts in that I suggested it is a linguistic and cultural issue. I love the idea of honouring people for trying to understand. Bear in mind that I am also Singaporean, but wanting to bring openness and also to learn about my culture that I have been removed from for a long time. Thanks for engaging in conversation!
@@jontytan No right or wrong really, it is a matter of choice. It is about how u want to live your life. Good to go back if our pledge and history of nation building. Half of our population still not that well educated, we are the fortunate ones who have received tertiary education and speak relatively good English. Try to learn Chinese and Malay. I am learning Malay having learnt Chinese n English thru formal education. My two cents worth of thoughts
Appreciate your thoughts! My wife has been learning Chinese and I'm keen to start Malay soon - probably just using duolingo first of all... I have been late to jump on that bandwagon!
@@jontytan Good! Wish u guys have a present learning journey Multi lingual is in Singaporean DNA. LKY as baba learn Hokkien and Chinese. Now PM also learn Chinese n Malay.
Having grown up in the west, my multi-linguistic skills stretch as far as French and Italian (I even learned Latin at school!) but none of the Asian languages...
Thankyou for bring up this subject . Yes I do agree singlish do sounds rude especially to non locals. That’s why I have never been a fan of Singlish despite being a Singaporean. Speaking singlish is acceptable to local , but could cause misunderstandings among non locals. Its known as ‘broken English ‘ . Your good examples of “what you want or Huh? are basically ‘ dialect ‘ driven responses without any prejudice. So Singlish ought to be wisely and not to everyone, anywhere and everywhere.
Thanks for sharing! I do wonder whether Singapore suffers from external expectation more than other nations as we are a hyper modern cosmopolitan city and the expectation therefore is placed on us. As you say, there are many dialects and Singlish to me is charming and should be protected!
Don't feel inferior! If you go to UK, try speaking to a Scottish. You may not understand their accents and I don't think they feel they are rude to U. This is how they speak, if u want to communicate with them, u need to try to understand them by answering questions such as what do u mean by .... Same for a new Yorker, they will not call their subway as MRT.
@@jontytan A bit blunt and direct to say sense of inferiority. Those who feel sorry for singlish and feel rude to speak to foreigners or westerners using singlish feel Singlish is not good enough or not proud of Singlish. How about Singaporean Chinese/Mandarin？ Not as many feel so? Why? Frankly, our command of English in general is better than Chinese especially among the younger pop. International rankings also rank us quite high in English language proficiency. I don't think when u speak to foreigners u have to use lah bojio that kind of words. But, when u refer to the Ang Mo Kio town, you have to still call it Ang Mo Kio as it is named using Hokkien.
Personally, I feel we need to be proud of our Singlish. Having grown up abroad, I wish my Singlish was better and that I understood more. And think people coming into Singapore should appreciate it as culture.
Much like good and bad, rudeness exists everywhere. As a Singaporean, I too get awfully annoyed by the curt and brusque manners of some people I encounter every so often. By the same token, I have also had such similar encounters in many other western countries as well. One may recall however that masses of Singaporeans chose to rise to the occasion to reach out to help frontliners and the vulnerable during the height of Covid would speak volumes to show that Singaporeans are a people who are generally undemonstrative and reticent but who have the capacity have compassion. Singaporeans have a soul and an EQ. That said, graciousness should begin at home and we still have a long long way to go in inculcating this elusive attribute to the very young in school.
Thanks for sharing - I totally agree, we are indeed sensitive and thoughtful, but there are rude people out there! Graciousness is super important, yes - do you think it is the job of the schools or the parents?
Politeness is not = caring. Singlish is a language of efficiency, which is not = less caring. Empathy, respect, gratitude is our values. Politeness can be culturally biased ( eg: eating while walking is not Politeness in some culture). Politeness can be conveyed through actions and other means, and not through English language.
Courteous language begets courteous behaviour. This video is appropriate and timely. We Singaporeans should all be taught basic courtesy, for without a ready vocabulary of courteous language and it’s associated behaviours, we can scarce expect our regular citizens to act in a gradually instinctive manner to be nice upfront.
Thanks for sharing! Having grown up abroad, I didn't experience the local school system... Do you think we miss out on being taught courtesy in schools? What about at home? Are manners and courtesy part of the parenting format? Thank you!
@@jontytan We were taught manners in school but it is the home environment that either reinforce what the school teaches or negates its effects as children always look up to their parents as their true enablers. We need public reminders that goals to good living are found and reflected in intangible ways like good manners. It's one of the hallmarks of refinement of society.
Thanks for these thoughts! I'm curious of what you think... some would say that many Singaporean kids are brought up by their helpers - some who come and go. Do you think this is true? Does this contribute to the lack of reinforcement at home?
@@jontytan I do not think helpers have the gravitas in children's lives to have that much influence over how they see the world. The old adage goes, that when you see children misbehaving, it is because their adults (parents) are misbehaving. It shows how little foundational work has gone into upbringing here. It does not help that the sense of entitlement many young folks here, especially girls, are not corrected when the media (the mandarin channels) reinforces that kind of sentiment, that ladies should be pampered while men have to win their favours. You tend to see a lot of these in predominantly average-class Mandarin-speaking families.
Interesting - I had thought it was the influence of western movies, chick flicks etc, (I don't watch the Mandarin ones) but very interesting to hear it is coming from those streams. Do you think this contributes to making dating harder for young Singaporean males?
Hi Jonty. This is a very subjective topic. It all depends on one’s experiences. For me, the answer to your question is yes and no. As a Singaporean who have lived here all my 72 years, I have seen and experienced the good and the bad….in various situations,….on the train, the bus, lifts, restaurants, shops etc. At times, I feel that things have improved, perhaps because I personally have had many positive experiences, but there are still those who give us a bad name. It is a very mixed bag. So, I think it is unfair to tar everyone with the same brush just because you have had bad experiences. I think there must be better understanding of the culture and behaviours of Singaporeans from all walks of life. I don’t think it is fair to judge all Singaporeans by your standards that you have picked up after living in a country where that is the norm. As for the uncle in the cai png stall asking what do you want, I don’t think it’s rude. They are just translating what is said in Chinese to English. And I have to tell you, the Comfort taxi uncles, in my experience, are sweethearts, so to speak. They greet you, and thank you and wish you a good day! Always happens when I have to call for a Comfort cab.
I totally agree - and I didn't mean to tarnish everyone with the same brush, apologies if it came across that way. I was suggesting that the heart and intent is much more important than the words that are used, particularly as we consider language and culture. Hoping that some big influencers will watch this and realise they were wrong in their opinions!
IMO, one can find our fair share of good, bad, and ugly citizens/residents.F ortunately, there are kind and polite Singaporeans but perhaps not as many as we would hope for. There’s been some improvements but it has plateaued ie many of our young children are raise by domestic helpers that may not be equipped nor conscientious enough to inculcate politeness and/or courtesy. As for residents, we get another whole community of good, bad, and ugly. Some nationalities more than others. As for communication, many Singaporeans speak English but are really deeply influenced by their respective mother-tongue culture and language. Hence, the variety of Singlish in Singapore. Perhaps it will take a few more generations before we will be truly competent in our English language. But then, it will probably mean that we would have loss a part of our heritage and culture as it is already evident now.
This is incredibly insightful. The idea of the helpers bringing up our children is a concerning one that I think has deeper implications than manners... emotional security and long-term mental health issues are some things that concern me. Also, a very challenging thought that as we become more competent in our English we will inevitably loose a part of our heritage and culture. Makes me wonder whether globalisation is, in fact, westernisation...
@@jontytan I should also have mentioned that I have no intentions to discriminate or single-out any particular persons. Like many things, the cause often has multiple players/contributing factors. However, if we want to address it, an honest diagnosis will be necessary before we can determine what is the most leffective resolution. As a Singaporean, I’m embarrassed and angry whenever I witness such rude and/or uncivil behaviour. Unfortunately, I can only try not to succumb to it but hope to be at least a positive influence through my own behaviour albeit imperfectly
@@jontytan As for language, Singlish* and English spoken in Singapore can come across as “rude” largely (as I’ve briefly mentioned) due to language/dialect idiolect. Plus, as you may well know and as pointed by some here, what is broadly attributed as “Singaporeans” are 3.6 M Singapore citizens, 0.6 Permanent Resident, and almost 1.8M non-residents including foreign workers which most visitors can’t tell apart. *People/Foreigners often describe Singlish as Singaporeans being succinct or pragmatic in their English speaking style. Unfortunately, while there are good number highly competent English Language speakers among Singaporeans, many are influenced and/or thinking in their respective dialects.
I am interested in the courtesy campaigns that someone here mentioned. It seems they paused for a while and are now back. It tells me that there is need for courtesy to improve on a national level. I appreciate that you are looking to just be your own positive influence - hopefully more us will do the same!
When I was growing up in Singapore in the 70s there was the Courtesy Campaigns etc. I have been living in the West for the past 37 years and in that time I visited Singapore once and found Singaporeans were still polite and efficient 😊
I would rather say, the rudeness is due to that particular person. It’s not due to their nationality. Rude people are everywhere around the world. No country is exempted. Let’s counter rudeness with kindness. Start with ourselves. Kindness is contagious. A smile begets a smile.
I definitely agree with this and I always like to think that my kindness might change someone’s day for the better… it’s good motivation to keep being kind! 😊 Thanks for sharing 🙏🏼
Dear Jonty, You might not have realized how much Singapore has changed over the past 20 years. We've seen a significant increase in foreign workers, making up over half of our population. These individuals contribute to various industries, including transportation (like bus and lorry drivers), food services (coffee shops and restaurants), retail, medical nurses and hotel front desk staff. So, if tourists have encountered rudeness, it's important to remember that they were likely interacting with foreign workers. Don't let these isolated experiences cloud your judgment of Singapore.
Hello - thank you for your thoughts. Yes, there has been a huge shift in the past 20 years. Having grown up abroad, I only say cross sections of this change when we returned to see family and for holidays. Of course, these incidents do not cloud my thoughts, I am still very grateful to my country and proud of Singapore. When you say "they were likely interacting with foreign workers", do you perceive those coming to work here to be rude?
Singaporeans are often kurt and as economical with words and behavior as possible, but you gotta check their expressions and vocal tone to accurately gauge if they are actually being rude.
Efficiency. Singaporeans are too used to being efficient in time usage, and that includes conversations. Having lived in Australia for a decade in the past, I do not think Singaporeans are rude. However, they are impatient with inefficiencies in everyday life. That said, being polite and using "please", "thank you" and all the pleasantries does not mean you are not rude. Sometimes, such words can come out extremely snobbish and unpleasant, especially in places like England and Australia.
Thanks for your comment! I agree - I don't think we are rude, but I wonder whether, without the cultural context (and linguistic too), we are perceived that way to folks who have a language basis that is more flourished with the pleasantries, as you say.
Many of those in service industry are not Singaporeans. We cannot expect anyone to speak English and always respond. Many seniors do not speak English, also Singaporeans are reserved.
I guess what is seen by some as "rudeness" or "abruptness" can be seen as "economical" or "efficient" to others. Efficiency can be cold in many a business environment. Thats why Singlish is often seen as a very "economical" language. Just to use the NZ v SG example, I used to travel to and from NZ yearly when I was in University, and sometime I get to travel on Air NZ and other times on Singapore Airlines. On AirNZ you can certainly expect the friendliest most relaxed crew, who would spend time chatting and laughing with you. However, you may not get your meals on time. On SQ, meals are handed out like clockwork, requests met with precise accuracy. That leaves very little time for small talk. Depends on what one prefers...
yes cos EQ side not developed , feel sorry for you lot Nice,friendly - produces far better results in talking to half humans who have not activated the other side being... From China, due to your history ( 1000 years in iron fist rule)... So ancestral wounds ... which is ... Rude in interviews, rude at work- this is not hawkers only. Barbaric
Thanks for sharing your thoughts! Do you think that economical and efficient must happen in place of kindness and politeness? Another way of putting it… do you feel economical and efficient means rude?
This is how we spoke and this is how we speak now. No nicety words doesn't mean we are rude. We are open, to the point and not superficial. Nicety words are too superficial, too fake, though nice to hear. 😆
"No nicety words doesn't mean we are rude." - I agree! I think there are some presumptions based on cultural norms - but cultural norms vary from place to place!
@@joeteo6536 I reckon it stems from our Mr Harry Lee being a no-nonsense and straight talker. It might explain why we Singaporeans can be blunt in our conversations.
I really think it’s the intention that counts, it’s a culture norm in each country that is different that makes it unique. I lived in Australia for a year and it’s normal for customer service people there to say “Hi how are you?” before taking our orders. I remembered hearing that for the first time I literally thought they are trying to know more about me 😂 instead I was wrong, it’s simply just a “Hi”. That being said, there are people in the west who put in nice sentences too but don’t actually mean it, it’s just expected. If false positivity exists, there’s also false negativity. It’s just how we perceive them and the intention of the others that really matters.
People at markets and hawkers are almost always older generation and they definitely don’t bring out their queen’s english with you. They just know what you want and send you on your merry way. In general, Singapore does not have the culture to have conversation with people unlike in UK. It’s just not part of the culture. It may come off as curt or abrupt to people but that is how it is. Shopkeepers in Singapore are not just gonna strike up a conversation with you. It’s common for ur friend to think that though. Many westerners cannot get used to Singaporeans just wanting to get the point across.
Rude-yes. Japanese are the best in my opinion- polite, GENTLE,and first class economy... Cos the first 5 years in their childhood upbringing..is manners,behaviours,not Learning Maths, business to get "ahead" of others- Kiasuness 😂
I love your use of the word “gentle”. Don’t think that gentleness is a cultural quality? Perhaps tonal too? I’m thinking in Europe, how certain languages seem harsher than others - compare Italian and German, for example!
Imo in Malaysia/Singapore people are generally very entitled to other people providing convenience to them. They don’t understand that people helped them because they want to not they need to.
@@jontytan most people, not just Singaporeans are kind and by that I mean don't go out of their way to do harm. In terms of rudeness, if we define it as a mannerism that doesn't make others comfortable or soothing, well in the case of Singaporeans I guess it is the way they expressed themselves. You can contrast that between BA cabin crew and pilots on how they convey the message Vs Singapore Airlines Cabin Crew and pilots. BA crews used lots of soothing words like please, thank you, how can I be of service to you, kindly please lift the blinds, etc. SQ crew less so. They would use direct words like, lift you blind, wait, they would come over and stare at you, etc. It is not that they are not kind but very curt to the point it seemed rude. Maybe the exception is first class.
Interesting - our experience of the SIA attendants is that they are the most hospitable! Hmm… this is triggering some thoughts that I need to chew on before sharing….
@@jontytan I am not saying SIA crews are not hospitable. I am simply saying the way they expressed themselves can be curt. And this comes across less soothing. Just like you can be hospitable to your guest offering food by just saying, loudly, makan, makan! You can be just as Downton Abbey polite and hospitable - please, help yourself to this fine steak! Or Downton Abbey style criticism - I am sorry it would appear your figure is a tad unsuitable for this dress - but still unaware you are being told you are fat. This because the messages delivered are so soothing. As opposed to aiyo dress too small lah!
No one perfect, no countries are perfect. Singapore has too many foreigners workers n more people from different countries are migrating into Singapore for jobs n as citizens. Singapore use to be rojak. Now we More rojak then before. So people u meet outside may not be a Singaporen. 😅
Thanks for your thoughts! You mention that we have "too many" foreigners... I'm curious as to what makes it TOO many? I agree that people we meet may not be Singaporean, but the same is true the other way around - people hear my voice and ask me where I am from - they are surprised when I say "Singapore!"
if we compare to other nearby asian countries, there is definitely room for improvement for Singapore. Taiwanese, Japanese , and Thais are perceived as more friendly than Singaporeans. Hong Kongers, Koreans sometimes also give the impression as rude.... The tone and abruptness about how Singaporeans speak... do leave the impression as being rude. Actually, they are not. However we can be better. Remember, many years ago, we had courtesy campaign. Guess this should be launched again to educate and improve to be a more gracious society.
@jontytan th-cam.com/video/3Id_D1xn1mg/w-d-xo.htmlsi=kJQHTppK_2Z6GXDm. Sharing with you .....our PM Lee Kuan Yew was the advocate of this campagin...n started 1979. Courtesy campaign, Kindness Campaign have been actively promoted more than 10 years ago.....but not recently...
@jontytan th-cam.com/video/Ni4a60JAsRM/w-d-xo.htmlsi=-UxzP6Ic1vC6y4tu.....likewise, PM LSL..also spoke about it. It is one of our national campaigns constantly wanting to remind and encourage Singaporeans to be more conscientious to be courteous.th-cam.com/video/6cBLYWVkrI0/w-d-xo.htmlsi=b2KzbR2h6aYF9gcD
Thank you for the links! I'm looking forward to watching them. I'm wondering.. what is it about Singapore's start point (or history) that means courtesy needs to be campaigned for by the government?
when you want to get things done and to get the point across precisely, time is precious. you do away with the Ps and Qs otherwise how did sg. progress so fast? rude means things unpleasant..... i am sure nobody said or did anything unpleasant except not saying please and thank you or excuse me. does that labelled as being rude?
I don’t think it means rude, but I know that, for example, in many communities of the UK, having manners is held in such high regard… there’s a saying, “manners maketh man” which I think can lead to these conclusions that Singaporeans are rude… thanks for your thoughts!
On average, I would say Singaporeans lean toward rudeness. It varies person to person, but I am more likely to run into someone less than polite than someone overly courteous. For example, a couple days ago I was in Harbor Front MRT Station on my way back from Sentosa for the Food Truck Festival. While waiting for a train, I had a little auntie crash into me because she wasn't watching where she was going. I said "sorry, excuse me." She just glared at me. I was standing still, and yet she apparently thought the collision was my fault. I have also had people glare and even hiss at me for stepping on to a bus that was approaching full...never mind that there were people still getting on after me. Yeah, I am a big guy, but that does not justify that behavior. And my kid gets all kinds of dirty looks. They have long hair, wear rainbow clothing, and usually a rainbow mask. This generates a lot of derisive glares, shifting seats (people will stand up to get away from sitting next to them), and rude comments that they assume wont be understood. There are plenty of polite friendly people. And the idea that it is just directness or efficiency has some merit. But there are even more than are downright rude or bigoted. That said, my home country is even worse in its own ways.
Thanks for your comment and for sharing your experiences. I'm sorry to hear of your experiences and your kid's, too. That makes me sad. Any ideas why you think Singaporeans lean toward rudeness?
@@jontytan I think a lot of it is cultural expectations. For example. When ordering dinner delivery, I always say thank you to the delivery person. Most of them seem surprised by this, and a few of them respond in kind. For me, it is automatic, and a sign of appreciation and politeness. But given the reactions, it seems like it is rare. Same goes for waitstaff at restaurants, aunties and uncles at hawker centers, Grab drivers. Anyone in a service job, I thank them for their efforts and many of them are surprised by it. This tells me that showing what I would call common courtesy to someone helping you, regardless of being paid for it. But again, this is a difference of expectation...not so much outright rudeness, as indifference that can come across as rude to someone from another culture. it is the surface interactions that come across as rude. But get past that, once friends or even just regular acquaintances, then they are as friendly as any I have met, and generous and helpful.
I appreciate this - yes... surface can appear rude, but as you say, much of it is cultural expectations. I agree that thanking people can be surprising to those who receive the thanks!
Cultral dude Kiasu bro. Eg "Your looking great my man , but to bad your balding" "KLIA excellent airport how come no planes" The list could go on and on. I said to one Singaporean who asked me what I thought of the Sands Marina Bay Casino . I said "It looks a giant ironing board" He got pissed hahah.
@@jontytan it’s pure cultural for sure , you ask any Malaysian and they say the same . Singapore claims , laksa, chicken rice as theirs Singapore want even a country when these Malaysian dishes were created! Then you wonder why they split and find greener pastures. These are facts I’ve been living in Malaysia for 50 years
@@Photojouralist123 sg and msia share much similarity from culture to food to relationships. I constantly hear people say we stole Msia food. These are foods we ate since young and it has been around all these while. So what then can be called Singapore cuisine? Satay isn't exactly Singaporean too but we grew up eating these and I have not heard Indonesians commenting we stealing their food. Singapore is built with immigrants from all over the world. So what is Singapore? This is. Btw Sg Laksa is indeed created in Sg. Are you aware there are diff versions of laksa?
I don’t think Singaporeans are rude… I was asking the question and providing my ideas while asking the opinion of my viewers… as a Singaporean myself, I don’t consider this to be the case… I am merely asking whether there is a reason why some influencers think we come across this way 😊 Let me know your thoughts…
@@jontytan 😀 Good for you. The thing is influencers like to stir things up for more views and arguments. Occasionally, like this, I make a point that it is rude to judge others. Christians: Do not judge others. Buddhists : Do not judge others. Confucius : Do not judge others. 😀😀😀
It’s great to make the point, but when there is no judgement in the content, it may come across as if you were the one judging without watching the content fully… I hope you can see that I am not looking to stir, but to bring understanding and to generate a good conversation about this topic, as with all my videos. Thank you for watching and interacting 🙂🙏🏼
Singaporean driving in Malaysia- is attrocious ,dangerous and wreckless which they dont dare to do it in their own country The please,thank you- Asians compensate with their tone of voice,head nods ,smiles- communication is not limited to language,and what your inner energy is, we can affect others too thru energy
Yes - body language is important! But I guess it’s different from country to country too? I wonder whether the Singaporeans you have witnessed drive badly due to the open roads and lesser punishments than in Singapore… thanks for your thoughts!
I want to share some observations I made upon returning to Malaysia. Having lived in the UK for over 20 years and having a diverse group of Singaporean friends, I have gained insights from different perspectives. Despite my background in governance with a technical foundation, I have noticed specific trends. It appears that enforcement in Malaysia can vary and may be influenced by the current leadership. This is a matter of concern, particularly considering the relatively high ratio of government servants to the population. Additionally, national statistics indicate a significant deficiency in reading and writing skills among Malaysians. Malaysians read only half a page compared to the global average of 2 books. While the former Prime Minister has a library, his successors seem to engage in much less reading. Given these observations, there is a valid concern about ensuring that the general public is well-informed when essential reading and writing skills are not adequately developed and public servants know what to do. As for the private sector in Malaysia, it's not up there in terms of diversity, equality and politeness while delivering results. Malaysians are pretty " brutal ", for lack of a better word.. when I was working in Malaysia- race warfare was glaringly obvious...and childlike... So, not for me- even though I was a world-class employee- I packed my bags and never turned back... Lots of corruption from the all sides not just what the press says...
Sorry to hear this. Particularly the race warfare - I haven't heard many narratives on this and would be keen to read if you were happy to share more? Thank you!
I would rather say, the rudeness is due to that particular person. It’s not due to their nationality. Rude people are everywhere around the world. No country is exempted. Let’s counter rudeness with kindness. Start with ourselves. Kindness is contagious. A smile begets a smile.
I once saw an auntie who was fearful of riding on the escalator and she was hesitating on whether to get on the escalator. Her daughter I suppose was beside, encouraging her to get on but she was still hesitant.
I did not think twice, walked up, offered her my arm and helped her onto the escalator to ride down to the level below.
Her daughter and her were very pleasantly surprised that I stepped up to help her and were thankful and I just replied “my pleasure “ to them and went on my way.
I believe it is down to the individual, whether they want to make a difference in another’s lives in small mundane things. Being helpful and polite is a personal choice. 😊
I love that you did this - thank you for sharing. We need to share more of our good works. 😊❤️
okay here's something i would like to share. i am in my 60s. it's during my mid primary school that we converted to intergrated school where you can choose between english and chinese classes. some of the teachers then were educated by the british system an so they emphasize on "please/thank you/excuse me/etc" and like if you don't mind instead of Okay or not. but as time goes by teachers are homegrown and all the niceties and polite speeches are eroded and not taught or forgo. so these politeness are lost. replaced by short and sharp way of speech to get the point across effectively equates to efficency. sorry are my english is not good and grammas are all over the places...... did not understand them well during my school days and still not now....
Thanks for the thoughts and opinions! Don’t think the niceties are essential?
@@jontytan good to have but then at times it's so hypocritical that people do away with it. i personally am old school so i am plentiful with my please and thank you... cultivated habits.
Interesting ideas on hypocritical niceties... hmmm... Do you think these hypocritical niceties can create a less genuine society?
I understand what your friend means. I'm a born and bred Singaporean. I do notice the courtesy and politeness decline over the years. I deal with teenagers and young adults in my line of work. Very very rare these youngsters give way to me whenever we enter the classroom. They would rush in first either to catch the best seats or to enjoy the aircon. If they are already in the classroom, they dont stand up to greet me when I enter. Most times I have to initiate the greetings first before they reluctantly stand up to greet back. And there are many occasions where I have to repeat my greetings before they respond. At times I will bring snacks for them. If I don't tell them to queue for their share, it will turn into a mini brawl for a few of them. They'll rush to my table and grab as many as they can and leave without a thank you. There are many more instances I can share. It saddens me how simple courtesy is eroding especially with our younger generations. Makes me wonder. Don't their parents teach them? Or are their parents like that and the kids mirror the behaviour? 🤔
Interesting thoughts! The parent factor is one I am very interested in, particularly as a parent myself and an educator… I often wonder about the amount of screen time I see children experiencing and the amount of helper involvement (feeding kids who are old enough to feed themselves, but are too distracted watching a phone!)…
@@eszeezee6967 a lot depends on upbringing by the parents but there is also influence from their peers too.
Do you think parents miss this generally? Are there other values held higher?
Thanks Jonty ...
As a person who has been to Singapore a number of times as a tourist, I have never felt that there has ever been rudeness. From the retailers to people at the bus stop I've never experienced anything like that. If anything, there might be a quiet reservedness (lol, is that even a word?😊) but definitely nothing negative
Thank you, Anne, for your response. I am very pleased to hear of your experiences! I can see the quiet reservedness (yes, a word!) for sure.
No matter what race, what nationalities, what religion....there are always good and bad.
I totally agree with this. People are people!
How u know they are Singaporeans?
As long as a human stand on Singapore soil, they are Singaporean?
I walked out, 90% I see are foreigners from China, Malaysia, India, Myamar, Vietnam, Cambodia, Blangadesh...etc
Someone from Britain complained to me when he tried to take the baby stroller thru MRT lift, all the Singaporeans never give way, he has to wait for the next lift.
Ya ya ya... All the population n human u met in Singapore, are born n raised "Singaporeans".
I thought my kind is gg extinct... didn't realize everyone in Singapore is Singaporeans and they are rude.
I’m not sure you watched the whole video…
@@jontytan I think your topic should be "are people in Singapore rude? Why?" Try not to use Singaporeans, it means born n raised in Spore. Note that many hawkers are msians PR, customer service are work permit, employment pass. It doesn't represent me (3rd generation Singaporean). Singlish are efficient. Not every language need to follow "English" as the Golden standard. Melayu doesn't have alot of these niceties but yet it's one fo the most friendly n cozy language. The rudeness u see in Singapore doesn't represent us.
maybe... also bear in mind that I am 3rd gen Singaporean too.. just been away a long time. I also stated that I haven't experienced rudeness, but instead gave examples of interactions I have been a part of to explain why I think there are linguistic and cultural implications too... thank you for responding - appreciate the clarity.
Very perceptive insights. I moved from SG to Metro Vancouver Canada 20 years ago and have seen it evolve. Much of the progress of its social conscience can be attributed to its many public campaigns and education. Metro Vancouver, being the magnet for international immigrants, has allowed me to see how different education and cultural backgrounds influence social etiquette. Rudeness is subjective, and pivots on the individual’s perspective.
I love this and I think it's very consistent with what I shared too - that it is subjective and use of language is culture based. I wonder whether recipients need to be more open to the idea that people do not intend to be rude and assume positive intentions?
I’m Malaysian imo ppl in this region (Malaysia Singapore) generally take other people kindness as granted. We don’t really have the concept that people helped because they want to not they need to.
That’s interesting! Do you think we tend to only be kind out of a need for something in return?
@@jontytan I mean something very casual like holding the door open for ppl or things like that. But ppl here expect u to do this kinda thing if u didn’t they get irritated, if u did most ppl not showing appreciation. It’s like I have a obligation to do ppl a favor rather than out of pure kindness
I see! Yes, no need to wait for acknowledgement - just do it from the goodness of your heart!
Its culture. Think about the word “can” and “ok”in Singlish, the number of meanings it has to make an appointment. “Sunday lunch? Ok!” Or “now can? Can!’ Instead of “Hi how are you? May I know if would you be free on Sunday to meet up for lunch? Sure, I’m free on Sunday. Thank you that’s great, I’ll see you then.’ 3 words is not rude but in fact polite, fast and straight to the point.
Early migrants were illiterate, poor, hardly knew English except their native language or dialect. Schools have not always been taught in English, it was only LKY made it a standard I think in the 80s. Simple words that everyone understands quickly like ‘can’ and ‘ok’ or ‘what you want? Dabao (and point to food you want)’ worked wonders.
When travelling or working with global people I avoid Singlish and use English to be understood. My partner is French and found me rude at first too but these days we talk and joke in a mix of broken French, Chinese, English, Italian and German. None with proper grammar between us but it works 😂
Btw great content and rude people exist in every country, Singapore is not immune nor perfect.
Love this comment. Thank you. Totally agree and appreciate your examples! I’m thinking I might do a follow up episode and include some of these thoughts! Thanks again!
Based on empirical exoerience, I felt that some of the younger gen dint have good etiquette, I taught a group of adult students who didn't really have courtesy and walked in and left the classroom for the day without informing the instructor.
In most groups that I teach, students would greet the instructor as they come in, and would just let the instructor know, "hey I'm leaving for the day". They gave a cold and aloof vibe probably unknowingly.
However, certain aunties and uncles were really polite to me in hawker centres.
I have experienced many very kind hawker aunties and uncles… do you feel the classroom courtesy has not been taught?
@@jontytan Im guessing a more individuaistic culture and stiff competition might have something to do with it. Also influences from USA perhaps. I almost wanted to reprimand them , 'did not your parents teach you courtesy and etiqutte ' .. coz if they were my kids, i woulld be reprimanding them so that they became better persons.
just my thoughts. could it be they come in and left quietly so as not to cause disruptions to the class? would that be being polite or rude? just topic to ponder on.
@@porpoisesg if I was teaching and the person left quietly I understand. But that was not so.
@@bk7322 if that is the case they are being rude and was not taught manners..... i should say poor ubpringing. these values has been lost anyway from my observation. in my opinon.
Actually, she is right... I am Singaporean btw. I would often hold the lift for prople and no one said thank you..but having said that, Singaporeans in general are willing to help, when needed
Maybe there are different expectations on when to say "thank you" and not?
Hmm...abrupt yes at times. Customer Service is poor, again at times, especially when shopping. Considering long days, hot days, and hours, many seem uninterested as the day progresses. I've actually walked out of a shop I was willing to spend in.
Thanks for sharing and I’m sorry to hear of your experience! Do you have any ideas why you think this is?
Most of the retail staff are foreigners and older sgrean generation ppl have no customer service.
Why do you think this is?
@@jontytan
Companies and the gov.
The environment they created. They seek rapid growth while neglecting quality. They treat ground workers as expendables and lowly. If locals dun do then replace with foreigners. if foreigners bad, replace with other foreigners. No training, no clear structure, no support system. Result in people having no pride in their job.
Unlike japan or other countries. You can see they take pride in whatever they do be it cleaners,movers, drivers, etc.
They rather fire and replace the employee rather than give a fair investigation/consequence/compensation.
Would it be accurate to say that the pursuit of saving money (or making money!) is causing us to be less kind? Perhaps taking less time to invest in people and wanting to see the return financially?
It’s quite a thought provoking few points you’ve brought up.
Singaporeans have a tendency to be more abrupt due to our embracing of efficiency. It’s partly a fairly Chinese thing (I feel) and also because we are in a rush to get to where we want so this is brought to a higher degree.
Then there is again the language issue. As a Mandarin speaker (barely), there isn’t as much in the way of “Please may I” and “If you wouldn’t mind” as in English. There are the niceties there but not as much as English, which is sometimes considered “flowery”.
I was in Australia for my undergraduate studies and I loved that people took time to say hi when passing by in the street and even a “thank you” to the bus driver when alighting from the bus. While I’ve done the “thank you” to the bus driver, I’ve found myself struggling with a “Good morning, how are you?” when I go to order my meal at the uni canteen. I felt it was slowing things down for the people behind the counter and holding up the queue.
As for your dad’s thoughts about the use of English, I share his opinion. Maybe the idea of a common language is buried in my subconscious but it’s more a case of me wanting to know what language to use. I’m terrible with code switching and hate having to fumble with languages when I speak to someone.
I do love English. It’s my first language so I would bristle if someone insisted on me using Mandarin. I would do so if I know that the other person isn’t able to speak English and needs help but if I were to be very rudely demanded “Why can’t you speak Mandarin?”, (I haven’t yet got that) I would shoot back “This is Singapore, speak English!”
As a child, Singapore was grappling with not just the four official languages here but also with the various dialects and minority languages, I really looked forward to the time where l, with increased English-medium education, everybody would be able to speak English and everybody _would_ be speaking English. Alas, this has not been the case for various reasons (one of them being the then-SBC deciding to go into locally-produced Mandarin TV shows instead of English ones). But the situation is better now than it has been.
Let’s see where this discussion takes us to. Thanks for the observation and the prompting.
Thank you for your thoughts and comment - very insightful and I appreciate it a lot! I like your acknowledgement of the contrast in language - I really feel this is the most significant element to Singaporeans seeming rude, particularly to foreigners. One thing I had not considered until reading people's comments is the idea that Singaporeans are in a rush, or don't have time. Is the pace of life too fast? Do we need to slow down? Thanks again!
@@jontytan I don' t think Singaporeans are in a rush all the time; it is more about being considerate to those who are standing in line behind you. I live in the US and having grown up in SG, it really frustrates me when I see a cashier at grocery store chatting with customers when there was a line of people waiting to pay. But over the years I have developed the 'necessary' patience to survive here lol Other times, I 'd just just put my items back when I see the line was too long.
Interesting! If placed in the same position, would you feel awkward and try to close the conversation if there were people behind you? Thanks for sharing - appreciate it!
Just came back from Bali and Singapore. I would say Singaporeans aren't as courteous as Indonesians. Of course it's just generalisation. I bumped into some friendly Singaporeans for sure. However overall, Indonesians are more polite and friendly.
Thanks for the observation! In what way were Indonesians more friendly?
It’s more of a culture, and lifestyle stress that people tend to appear in a certain manner. While our country liberally brings in more people, we have to note that assimilation and cultural preservation need to be addressed properly too. It is not all just economic benefits and assume that things will fall in place nicely. Our government needs to improve on this area.
Interesting!! I am very interested in the local/foreigner divide… I find it very vivid in our culture.
@@jontytan would you say big city congestion plays a part too? I mean apparently I hear in London people are more in a rush and hence are more likely to display aloofness, whilst out in the Home Counties the boomers and everyone is willing to say ‘how are you’ in the bus stop. Have you lived out in the Home Counties before?
Also as a Brit it would be interesting to hear you discuss the topic of ‘classism and social class identities in Singapore’ which is a very contentious topic (arguably the most pressing one now) knowing you are brought up in a country where social class is very engrained in the British psyche. Though I’d argue that while class is more engrained in the UK, they are more honest about it being a problem and are paying lip service to improve it (e.g. Oxford uni students are trying to get more working class students in).
Big city congestion is a really interesting point. I grew up in the home counties and from town to town the sense of safety and kindness can vary a lot.
Social classes is a very interesting one as I think they are much more blended in the UK whereas, despite being a much smaller country, here in Singapore many of us keep to our own - I mean, my grandma’s neighbourhood for example don’t really venture even to the local mall. Lots to consider from this comment - thank you!
Some say that rudeness level of hawkers is directionally proportionate to quality of food served. 😅
New sub to join you on your amazing journey!
Interesting!! Hahaha. I wonder if I could actually collect this data?! Hahah. Thank you!!
Hi. I used to say "siam" in hokkien. My supervisor always scolds me for being rude. I always reply I only be practical. "Siam" only 1 sound while excuse me uses 3 sound. N I get my intentions across faster.
Efficiency! In these situations would you feel that you ought to adapt to communicate your feelings though words, or do you think your supervisor ought to understand the linguistic nuances in your response? Thank you!
As a New Zealander, who apologises to the person that bumps into me!!!! I think a bit of that may be your colleague too!
We are returning to Singapore tomorrow, for 10 days on our way home, after 3 weeks in Hong Kong. We had a week in Singapore on the way. We have noticed, particularly on the teains here, that Singaporeans are so much more polite, no one stands for anyone on trains, not even a pregnant woman!
Taxi drivers in Singapore are so chatty, on the whole, we have had amazing trips on taxis with great yarns being told.
Cell phones, but as a youngster, we read books on buses!
Great post Jonty.
That’s some wonderful observations! I am super glad to hear it! I’m very interested in intent vs impact as sometimes people choose to receive it negatively, or even somehow can’t hear it in any other way! Have the best time in Singapore! What are your must-do’s for the trip?
We have just been to the Raffles Marina Lighthouse, got there as an astonishing electrical storm and torrential rain started.
We hope to be doing some of the nature walks, weather permitting. We are going to hire an bike.
Will go to the new Bird Park, last night we were here the old one was about to close.😊
Amazing!! I love that lighthouse, not been in a long time. Is the Marina Bistro still there?
@@jontytan we actually didn't look properly, we were enthralled by the dark sky and thunder and lightning. Didn't hang about.
No worries! Have the best time / enjoy the rest of your stay!
Of the 5 million plus population in Singapore, there are estimated 4 million plus Singapore citizens and permanent residents, among these 4 million plus, according to the year 2021 renowned Pew Research Survey findings results conducted on Singaporeans, there are 1 million Singaporean citizens and permanent residents that are former Malaysia-born Malaysians that migrated to Singapore. In S'pore among all the different countries new citizens and permanent residents, Malaysians are the largest group of new citizens and permanent residents.
Thanks for the info.. is there a suggestion you have based on these stats regarding rudeness?
I guess the issue here is that Jonty and his NZ friend is trying to apply their cultural norms on Singapore. Chinese Singaporeans normally only greet people that they know. In the west, your neighbor can sue you for negligence if they fall and injured in front of your gate without even telling u. Though, they greet u every morning. I guess it depends on what u want, no right or wrong. On speaking english, a big portion of older generation have not received formal education and frankly u should not expect them to speak English to U. The fact that they are trying to understand u means that they are making an effort. Try to speak Chinese in London and I am not sure what will happen. I guess when U are here you need ti assimilate yourself in the local culture. There is no perfect world, UK, NZ or any country.
I don't think I was trying to apply my own cultural norms, just to explore where this idea comes from. In fact, I did also align with your thoughts in that I suggested it is a linguistic and cultural issue. I love the idea of honouring people for trying to understand. Bear in mind that I am also Singaporean, but wanting to bring openness and also to learn about my culture that I have been removed from for a long time. Thanks for engaging in conversation!
@@jontytan No right or wrong really, it is a matter of choice. It is about how u want to live your life. Good to go back if our pledge and history of nation building. Half of our population still not that well educated, we are the fortunate ones who have received tertiary education and speak relatively good English. Try to learn Chinese and Malay. I am learning Malay having learnt Chinese n English thru formal education. My two cents worth of thoughts
Appreciate your thoughts! My wife has been learning Chinese and I'm keen to start Malay soon - probably just using duolingo first of all... I have been late to jump on that bandwagon!
@@jontytan Good! Wish u guys have a present learning journey Multi lingual is in Singaporean DNA. LKY as baba learn Hokkien and Chinese. Now PM also learn Chinese n Malay.
Having grown up in the west, my multi-linguistic skills stretch as far as French and Italian (I even learned Latin at school!) but none of the Asian languages...
Thankyou for bring up this subject . Yes I do agree singlish do sounds rude especially to non locals. That’s why I have never been a fan of Singlish despite being a Singaporean. Speaking singlish is acceptable to local , but could cause misunderstandings among non locals. Its known as ‘broken English ‘ . Your good examples of “what you want or Huh? are basically ‘ dialect ‘ driven responses without any prejudice. So Singlish ought to be wisely and not to everyone, anywhere and everywhere.
Thanks for sharing! I do wonder whether Singapore suffers from external expectation more than other nations as we are a hyper modern cosmopolitan city and the expectation therefore is placed on us. As you say, there are many dialects and Singlish to me is charming and should be protected!
Don't feel inferior! If you go to UK, try speaking to a Scottish. You may not understand their accents and I don't think they feel they are rude to U. This is how they speak, if u want to communicate with them, u need to try to understand them by answering questions such as what do u mean by .... Same for a new Yorker, they will not call their subway as MRT.
I don’t think it’s a sense of inferiority… maybe Singapore’s eastern traits but western expectation is causing some of these tensions…
@@jontytan A bit blunt and direct to say sense of inferiority. Those who feel sorry for singlish and feel rude to speak to foreigners or westerners using singlish feel Singlish is not good enough or not proud of Singlish. How about Singaporean Chinese/Mandarin？ Not as many feel so? Why? Frankly, our command of English in general is better than Chinese especially among the younger pop. International rankings also rank us quite high in English language proficiency. I don't think when u speak to foreigners u have to use lah bojio that kind of words. But, when u refer to the Ang Mo Kio town, you have to still call it Ang Mo Kio as it is named using Hokkien.
Personally, I feel we need to be proud of our Singlish. Having grown up abroad, I wish my Singlish was better and that I understood more. And think people coming into Singapore should appreciate it as culture.
Much like good and bad, rudeness exists everywhere. As a Singaporean, I too get awfully annoyed by the curt and brusque manners of some people I encounter every so often. By the same token, I have also had such similar encounters in many other western countries as well. One may recall however that masses of Singaporeans chose to rise to the occasion to reach out to help frontliners and the vulnerable during the height of Covid would speak volumes to show that Singaporeans are a people who are generally undemonstrative and reticent but who have the capacity have compassion. Singaporeans have a soul and an EQ. That said, graciousness should begin at home and we still have a long long way to go in inculcating this elusive attribute to the very young in school.
Thanks for sharing - I totally agree, we are indeed sensitive and thoughtful, but there are rude people out there! Graciousness is super important, yes - do you think it is the job of the schools or the parents?
Politeness is not = caring. Singlish is a language of efficiency, which is not = less caring. Empathy, respect, gratitude is our values. Politeness can be culturally biased ( eg: eating while walking is not Politeness in some culture). Politeness can be conveyed through actions and other means, and not through English language.
Agreed - great thoughts here, thank you!
Courteous language begets courteous behaviour. This video is appropriate and timely. We Singaporeans should all be taught basic courtesy, for without a ready vocabulary of courteous language and it’s associated behaviours, we can scarce expect our regular citizens to act in a gradually instinctive manner to be nice upfront.
Thanks for sharing! Having grown up abroad, I didn't experience the local school system... Do you think we miss out on being taught courtesy in schools? What about at home? Are manners and courtesy part of the parenting format? Thank you!
@@jontytan We were taught manners in school but it is the home environment that either reinforce what the school teaches or negates its effects as children always look up to their parents as their true enablers. We need public reminders that goals to good living are found and reflected in intangible ways like good manners. It's one of the hallmarks of refinement of society.
Thanks for these thoughts! I'm curious of what you think... some would say that many Singaporean kids are brought up by their helpers - some who come and go. Do you think this is true? Does this contribute to the lack of reinforcement at home?
@@jontytan I do not think helpers have the gravitas in children's lives to have that much influence over how they see the world. The old adage goes, that when you see children misbehaving, it is because their adults (parents) are misbehaving. It shows how little foundational work has gone into upbringing here. It does not help that the sense of entitlement many young folks here, especially girls, are not corrected when the media (the mandarin channels) reinforces that kind of sentiment, that ladies should be pampered while men have to win their favours. You tend to see a lot of these in predominantly average-class Mandarin-speaking families.
Interesting - I had thought it was the influence of western movies, chick flicks etc, (I don't watch the Mandarin ones) but very interesting to hear it is coming from those streams. Do you think this contributes to making dating harder for young Singaporean males?
Hi Jonty. This is a very subjective topic. It all depends on one’s experiences. For me, the answer to your question is yes and no. As a Singaporean who have lived here all my 72 years, I have seen and experienced the good and the bad….in various situations,….on the train, the bus, lifts, restaurants, shops etc. At times, I feel that things have improved, perhaps because I personally have had many positive experiences, but there are still those who give us a bad name. It is a very mixed bag. So, I think it is unfair to tar everyone with the same brush just because you have had bad experiences. I think there must be better understanding of the culture and behaviours of Singaporeans from all walks of life. I don’t think it is fair to judge all Singaporeans by your standards that you have picked up after living in a country where that is the norm.
As for the uncle in the cai png stall asking what do you want, I don’t think it’s rude. They are just translating what is said in Chinese to English. And I have to tell you, the Comfort taxi uncles, in my experience, are sweethearts, so to speak. They greet you, and thank you and wish you a good day! Always happens when I have to call for a Comfort cab.
I totally agree - and I didn't mean to tarnish everyone with the same brush, apologies if it came across that way. I was suggesting that the heart and intent is much more important than the words that are used, particularly as we consider language and culture. Hoping that some big influencers will watch this and realise they were wrong in their opinions!
@@jontytan Sorry, Jonty, I didn’t mean you! But I often read comments by others who do that. Should have made myself clearer!
That's OK! I didn't take it personally, just wanted to clarify! It is very interesting to read the very varied comments on this post in particular!
it not that Singaporeans are rude. it just that people from UK are overly polite. :P
Quite possibly! Heheh - Brits apologise when someone else walks into them without looking!
IMO, one can find our fair share of good, bad, and ugly citizens/residents.F ortunately, there are kind and polite Singaporeans but perhaps not as many as we would hope for. There’s been some improvements but it has plateaued ie many of our young children are raise by domestic helpers that may not be equipped nor conscientious enough to inculcate politeness and/or courtesy. As for residents, we get another whole community of good, bad, and ugly. Some nationalities more than others. As for communication, many Singaporeans speak English but are really deeply influenced by their respective mother-tongue culture and language. Hence, the variety of Singlish in Singapore. Perhaps it will take a few more generations before we will be truly competent in our English language. But then, it will probably mean that we would have loss a part of our heritage and culture as it is already evident now.
This is incredibly insightful. The idea of the helpers bringing up our children is a concerning one that I think has deeper implications than manners... emotional security and long-term mental health issues are some things that concern me. Also, a very challenging thought that as we become more competent in our English we will inevitably loose a part of our heritage and culture. Makes me wonder whether globalisation is, in fact, westernisation...
@@jontytan I should also have mentioned that I have no intentions to discriminate or single-out any particular persons. Like many things, the cause often has multiple players/contributing factors. However, if we want to address it, an honest diagnosis will be necessary before we can determine what is the most leffective resolution. As a Singaporean, I’m embarrassed and angry whenever I witness such rude and/or uncivil behaviour. Unfortunately, I can only try not to succumb to it but hope to be at least a positive influence through my own behaviour albeit imperfectly
@@jontytan As for language, Singlish* and English spoken in Singapore can come across as “rude” largely (as I’ve briefly mentioned) due to language/dialect idiolect. Plus, as you may well know and as pointed by some here, what is broadly attributed as “Singaporeans” are 3.6 M Singapore citizens, 0.6 Permanent Resident, and almost 1.8M non-residents including foreign workers which most visitors can’t tell apart.
*People/Foreigners often describe Singlish as Singaporeans being succinct or pragmatic in their English speaking style. Unfortunately, while there are good number highly competent English Language speakers among Singaporeans, many are influenced and/or thinking in their respective dialects.
I am interested in the courtesy campaigns that someone here mentioned. It seems they paused for a while and are now back. It tells me that there is need for courtesy to improve on a national level. I appreciate that you are looking to just be your own positive influence - hopefully more us will do the same!
When I was growing up in Singapore in the 70s there was the Courtesy Campaigns etc. I have been living in the West for the past 37 years and in that time I visited Singapore once and found Singaporeans were still polite and efficient 😊
That's lovely to know! I have been looking into the Courtesy Campaigns - very interesting! Thanks for sharing!
I would rather say, the rudeness is due to that particular person. It’s not due to their nationality. Rude people are everywhere around the world. No country is exempted. Let’s counter rudeness with kindness. Start with ourselves. Kindness is contagious. A smile begets a smile.
I definitely agree with this and I always like to think that my kindness might change someone’s day for the better… it’s good motivation to keep being kind! 😊 Thanks for sharing 🙏🏼
Dear Jonty,
You might not have realized how much Singapore has changed over the past 20 years. We've seen a significant increase in foreign workers, making up over half of our population. These individuals contribute to various industries, including transportation (like bus and lorry drivers), food services (coffee shops and restaurants), retail, medical nurses and hotel front desk staff.
So, if tourists have encountered rudeness, it's important to remember that they were likely interacting with foreign workers. Don't let these isolated experiences cloud your judgment of Singapore.
Hello - thank you for your thoughts. Yes, there has been a huge shift in the past 20 years. Having grown up abroad, I only say cross sections of this change when we returned to see family and for holidays. Of course, these incidents do not cloud my thoughts, I am still very grateful to my country and proud of Singapore.
When you say "they were likely interacting with foreign workers", do you perceive those coming to work here to be rude?
@@jontytan I don't mean to be rude, however, many of them I've met are likely to be.
Why do you think this is?
@@jontytan If you notice carefully... A large percentage of our workforce is composed of inexperienced, undertrained, or temporary employees.
cheaper labour, I guess?
Singaporeans are often kurt and as economical with words and behavior as possible, but you gotta check their expressions and vocal tone to accurately gauge if they are actually being rude.
Yes, agreed - I am definitely of the opinion that Singaporeans may come across rude, despite best intentions. Thanks for sharing!
We will be rude if get irritated by annoying beings !
Haha! Do you think we are easily irritated?
Efficiency. Singaporeans are too used to being efficient in time usage, and that includes conversations. Having lived in Australia for a decade in the past, I do not think Singaporeans are rude. However, they are impatient with inefficiencies in everyday life.
That said, being polite and using "please", "thank you" and all the pleasantries does not mean you are not rude. Sometimes, such words can come out extremely snobbish and unpleasant, especially in places like England and Australia.
Thanks for your comment! I agree - I don't think we are rude, but I wonder whether, without the cultural context (and linguistic too), we are perceived that way to folks who have a language basis that is more flourished with the pleasantries, as you say.
@@jontytan This I guess this is down to societal and cultural context and norms.
Exactly - when we are abroad, we need to have openness to the fact that other societies have different norms too :)
@@jontytan Completely agree. As they say, "When in Rome, do as the Romans do".
Yes, but I guess we need to first understand what the Romans do! 😊
Many of those in service industry are not Singaporeans. We cannot expect anyone to speak English and always respond. Many seniors do not speak English, also Singaporeans are reserved.
Very true - I wonder whether this was considered by those commenting negatively. Thanks for the point!
I guess what is seen by some as "rudeness" or "abruptness" can be seen as "economical" or "efficient" to others. Efficiency can be cold in many a business environment. Thats why Singlish is often seen as a very "economical" language.
Just to use the NZ v SG example, I used to travel to and from NZ yearly when I was in University, and sometime I get to travel on Air NZ and other times on Singapore Airlines. On AirNZ you can certainly expect the friendliest most relaxed crew, who would spend time chatting and laughing with you. However, you may not get your meals on time. On SQ, meals are handed out like clockwork, requests met with precise accuracy. That leaves very little time for small talk. Depends on what one prefers...
yes cos EQ side not developed , feel sorry for you lot
Nice,friendly - produces far better results in talking to half humans who have not activated the other side being...
From China, due to your history ( 1000 years in iron fist rule)...
So ancestral wounds ... which is ...
Rude in interviews, rude at work- this is not hawkers only.
Barbaric
Thanks for sharing your thoughts! Do you think that economical and efficient must happen in place of kindness and politeness? Another way of putting it… do you feel economical and efficient means rude?
This is how we spoke and this is how we speak now. No nicety words doesn't mean we are rude. We are open, to the point and not superficial. Nicety words are too superficial, too fake, though nice to hear. 😆
"No nicety words doesn't mean we are rude." - I agree! I think there are some presumptions based on cultural norms - but cultural norms vary from place to place!
@@joeteo6536 I reckon it stems from our Mr Harry Lee being a no-nonsense and straight talker. It might explain why we Singaporeans can be blunt in our conversations.
Quite possibly... I wonder whether there's a balance between straight talking and coming across as kind, too? Rather than blunt, I mean...
I really think it’s the intention that counts, it’s a culture norm in each country that is different that makes it unique.
I lived in Australia for a year and it’s normal for customer service people there to say “Hi how are you?” before taking our orders. I remembered hearing that for the first time I literally thought they are trying to know more about me 😂 instead I was wrong, it’s simply just a “Hi”.
That being said, there are people in the west who put in nice sentences too but don’t actually mean it, it’s just expected. If false positivity exists, there’s also false negativity. It’s just how we perceive them and the intention of the others that really matters.
I love the idea of false positivity and false negativity! Definitely agree - even “how’s it going?” becomes awkward if you actually answer!
The Chinese speaking locals will translate directly from dialect to English - I don't think they mean to be rude.
Agree with this! It is so important to understand cultural contexts..
I think you should elaborate more on your friend how she encounters the rudeness from Singaporean
She mentioned people not saying thanks when she holds doors and the way she is spoken to in markets and hawkers…
People at markets and hawkers are almost always older generation and they definitely don’t bring out their queen’s english with you. They just know what you want and send you on your merry way.
In general, Singapore does not have the culture to have conversation with people unlike in UK. It’s just not part of the culture. It may come off as curt or abrupt to people but that is how it is. Shopkeepers in Singapore are not just gonna strike up a conversation with you.
It’s common for ur friend to think that though. Many westerners cannot get used to Singaporeans just wanting to get the point across.
Rude-yes.
Japanese are the best in my opinion- polite, GENTLE,and first class economy...
Cos the first 5 years in their childhood upbringing..is manners,behaviours,not Learning Maths, business to get "ahead" of others- Kiasuness
😂
I love your use of the word “gentle”. Don’t think that gentleness is a cultural quality? Perhaps tonal too? I’m thinking in Europe, how certain languages seem harsher than others - compare Italian and German, for example!
SINGAPORE PEOPLE HAVE DIFFICULTY IN OPENING THEIR MOUTH BY SAYING "THANK YOU" AND "EXCUSE ME" .
Why do you think this is?
Imo in Malaysia/Singapore people are generally very entitled to other people providing convenience to them. They don’t understand that people helped them because they want to not they need to.
Why do you think this is? Thanks for sharing!
It is - what you want, not what do you want. its too long, it will waste 0.5 milliseconds.
Haha - yes, important to be extra efficient!
@@jontytan courtesy and politeness is illegal in Singapore, efficiency comes first.
Do you think efficiency sometimes comes at the cost of being polite and courteous?
@@jontytan Singaporeans are never known to be polite and courteous, its was never part of the culture so nothing lost actually.
Why, would you say, has politeness never part of Singaporean society?
Maybe the word that best describe Singaporean is curt.
I see curt at brief, but also rude… I still feel like Singaporeans are generally kind, but come across as rude to some…
@@jontytan most people, not just Singaporeans are kind and by that I mean don't go out of their way to do harm.
In terms of rudeness, if we define it as a mannerism that doesn't make others comfortable or soothing, well in the case of Singaporeans I guess it is the way they expressed themselves.
You can contrast that between BA cabin crew and pilots on how they convey the message Vs Singapore Airlines Cabin Crew and pilots.
BA crews used lots of soothing words like please, thank you, how can I be of service to you, kindly please lift the blinds, etc.
SQ crew less so. They would use direct words like, lift you blind, wait, they would come over and stare at you, etc. It is not that they are not kind but very curt to the point it seemed rude. Maybe the exception is first class.
Interesting - our experience of the SIA attendants is that they are the most hospitable! Hmm… this is triggering some thoughts that I need to chew on before sharing….
@@jontytan I am not saying SIA crews are not hospitable. I am simply saying the way they expressed themselves can be curt. And this comes across less soothing. Just like you can be hospitable to your guest offering food by just saying, loudly, makan, makan!
You can be just as Downton Abbey polite and hospitable - please, help yourself to this fine steak!
Or Downton Abbey style criticism - I am sorry it would appear your figure is a tad unsuitable for this dress - but still unaware you are being told you are fat. This because the messages delivered are so soothing. As opposed to aiyo dress too small lah!
Interesting. Yes - I love the sound of "makan makan!!" hahaha.
No one perfect, no countries are perfect. Singapore has too many foreigners workers n more people from different countries are migrating into Singapore for jobs n as citizens. Singapore use to be rojak. Now we More rojak then before. So people u meet outside may not be a Singaporen. 😅
Thanks for your thoughts! You mention that we have "too many" foreigners... I'm curious as to what makes it TOO many? I agree that people we meet may not be Singaporean, but the same is true the other way around - people hear my voice and ask me where I am from - they are surprised when I say "Singapore!"
if we compare to other nearby asian countries, there is definitely room for improvement for Singapore. Taiwanese, Japanese , and Thais are perceived as more friendly than Singaporeans.
Hong Kongers, Koreans sometimes also give the impression as rude....
The tone and abruptness about how Singaporeans speak... do leave the impression as being rude. Actually, they are not. However we can be better. Remember, many years ago, we had courtesy campaign. Guess this should be launched again to educate and improve to be a more gracious society.
Thanks for these thoughts! I don’t remember the courtesy campaign - can you share a few more details as to how this was carried out? Thank you! 🙏🏼
@jontytan th-cam.com/video/3Id_D1xn1mg/w-d-xo.htmlsi=kJQHTppK_2Z6GXDm. Sharing with you .....our PM Lee Kuan Yew was the advocate of this campagin...n started 1979. Courtesy campaign, Kindness Campaign have been actively promoted more than 10 years ago.....but not recently...
@jontytan th-cam.com/video/Ni4a60JAsRM/w-d-xo.htmlsi=-UxzP6Ic1vC6y4tu.....likewise, PM LSL..also spoke about it. It is one of our national campaigns constantly wanting to remind and encourage Singaporeans to be more conscientious to be courteous.th-cam.com/video/6cBLYWVkrI0/w-d-xo.htmlsi=b2KzbR2h6aYF9gcD
Thank you for the links! I'm looking forward to watching them. I'm wondering.. what is it about Singapore's start point (or history) that means courtesy needs to be campaigned for by the government?
when you want to get things done and to get the point across precisely, time is precious. you do away with the Ps and Qs otherwise how did sg. progress so fast? rude means things unpleasant..... i am sure nobody said or did anything unpleasant except not saying please and thank you or excuse me. does that labelled as being rude?
I don’t think it means rude, but I know that, for example, in many communities of the UK, having manners is held in such high regard… there’s a saying, “manners maketh man” which I think can lead to these conclusions that Singaporeans are rude… thanks for your thoughts!
On average, I would say Singaporeans lean toward rudeness. It varies person to person, but I am more likely to run into someone less than polite than someone overly courteous. For example, a couple days ago I was in Harbor Front MRT Station on my way back from Sentosa for the Food Truck Festival. While waiting for a train, I had a little auntie crash into me because she wasn't watching where she was going. I said "sorry, excuse me." She just glared at me. I was standing still, and yet she apparently thought the collision was my fault. I have also had people glare and even hiss at me for stepping on to a bus that was approaching full...never mind that there were people still getting on after me. Yeah, I am a big guy, but that does not justify that behavior. And my kid gets all kinds of dirty looks. They have long hair, wear rainbow clothing, and usually a rainbow mask. This generates a lot of derisive glares, shifting seats (people will stand up to get away from sitting next to them), and rude comments that they assume wont be understood.
There are plenty of polite friendly people. And the idea that it is just directness or efficiency has some merit. But there are even more than are downright rude or bigoted.
That said, my home country is even worse in its own ways.
Thanks for your comment and for sharing your experiences. I'm sorry to hear of your experiences and your kid's, too. That makes me sad. Any ideas why you think Singaporeans lean toward rudeness?
@@jontytan I think a lot of it is cultural expectations. For example. When ordering dinner delivery, I always say thank you to the delivery person. Most of them seem surprised by this, and a few of them respond in kind. For me, it is automatic, and a sign of appreciation and politeness. But given the reactions, it seems like it is rare. Same goes for waitstaff at restaurants, aunties and uncles at hawker centers, Grab drivers. Anyone in a service job, I thank them for their efforts and many of them are surprised by it. This tells me that showing what I would call common courtesy to someone helping you, regardless of being paid for it. But again, this is a difference of expectation...not so much outright rudeness, as indifference that can come across as rude to someone from another culture.
it is the surface interactions that come across as rude. But get past that, once friends or even just regular acquaintances, then they are as friendly as any I have met, and generous and helpful.
I appreciate this - yes... surface can appear rude, but as you say, much of it is cultural expectations. I agree that thanking people can be surprising to those who receive the thanks!
not rude but toxicly Haolian
Interesting. In all cases?
Cultral dude Kiasu bro. Eg "Your looking great my man , but to bad your balding" "KLIA excellent airport how come no planes" The list could go on and on. I said to one Singaporean who asked me what I thought of the Sands Marina Bay Casino . I said "It looks a giant ironing board" He got pissed hahah.
" ironing board" with an attitude 😂
This is a good observation. Do you think it is purely cultural-kiasuism, or do you think some is linguistic?
@@jontytan it’s pure cultural for sure , you ask any Malaysian and they say the same . Singapore claims , laksa, chicken rice as theirs Singapore want even a country when these Malaysian dishes were created! Then you wonder why they split and find greener pastures. These are facts I’ve been living in Malaysia for 50 years
@Photojouralist123 how do u prove chicken rice is created by the Malaysians?
@@Photojouralist123 sg and msia share much similarity from culture to food to relationships. I constantly hear people say we stole Msia food. These are foods we ate since young and it has been around all these while. So what then can be called Singapore cuisine? Satay isn't exactly Singaporean too but we grew up eating these and I have not heard Indonesians commenting we stealing their food. Singapore is built with immigrants from all over the world. So what is Singapore? This is.
Btw Sg Laksa is indeed created in Sg. Are you aware there are diff versions of laksa?
Yes
Why do you think this is?
😂is it rude to judge Sporeans? Should they conform to a standard that you consider "not rude"?
I don’t think Singaporeans are rude… I was asking the question and providing my ideas while asking the opinion of my viewers… as a Singaporean myself, I don’t consider this to be the case… I am merely asking whether there is a reason why some influencers think we come across this way 😊 Let me know your thoughts…
@@jontytan 😀 Good for you. The thing is influencers like to stir things up for more views and arguments. Occasionally, like this, I make a point that it is rude to judge others.
Christians: Do not judge others.
Buddhists : Do not judge others.
Confucius : Do not judge others.
😀😀😀
It’s great to make the point, but when there is no judgement in the content, it may come across as if you were the one judging without watching the content fully… I hope you can see that I am not looking to stir, but to bring understanding and to generate a good conversation about this topic, as with all my videos. Thank you for watching and interacting 🙂🙏🏼
don’t like it here, can always leave. simple as.
I don’t think you watched the video… 🤦🏻♂️ please don’t contribute to the reason why people think we are rude.. it really doesn’t help!
@@jontytan could be worse, I mean look at Hong Kong!
I don’t know Hong Kong or its culture… I was talking about here..
Singaporean driving in Malaysia- is attrocious ,dangerous and wreckless
which they dont dare to do it in their own country
The please,thank you- Asians compensate with their tone of voice,head nods ,smiles- communication is not limited to language,and what your inner energy is, we can affect others too thru energy
Yes - body language is important! But I guess it’s different from country to country too? I wonder whether the Singaporeans you have witnessed drive badly due to the open roads and lesser punishments than in Singapore… thanks for your thoughts!
I want to share some observations I made upon returning to Malaysia. Having lived in the UK for over 20 years and having a diverse group of Singaporean friends, I have gained insights from different perspectives. Despite my background in governance with a technical foundation, I have noticed specific trends.
It appears that enforcement in Malaysia can vary and may be influenced by the current leadership. This is a matter of concern, particularly considering the relatively high ratio of government servants to the population. Additionally, national statistics indicate a significant deficiency in reading and writing skills among Malaysians. Malaysians read only half a page compared to the global average of 2 books. While the former Prime Minister has a library, his successors seem to engage in much less reading.
Given these observations, there is a valid concern about ensuring that the general public is well-informed when essential reading and writing skills are not adequately developed and public servants know what to do.
As for the private sector in Malaysia, it's not up there in terms of diversity, equality and politeness while delivering results.
Malaysians are pretty " brutal ", for lack of a better word.. when I was working in Malaysia- race warfare was glaringly obvious...and childlike...
So, not for me- even though I was a world-class employee- I packed my bags and never turned back...
Lots of corruption from the all sides not just what the press says...
Same to Malaysian driving in Singapore too, did not stop at zebra Cross to let pedestrian pass. Modify Loud exhaust pipe, reckless too. 😂😂😂
@@Sunny-yh3vf totally agree
Law enforcement and public outcry - tone deaf ... but public need education and vendors need education...
Sorry to hear this. Particularly the race warfare - I haven't heard many narratives on this and would be keen to read if you were happy to share more? Thank you!
I would rather say, the rudeness is due to that particular person. It’s not due to their nationality. Rude people are everywhere around the world. No country is exempted. Let’s counter rudeness with kindness. Start with ourselves. Kindness is contagious. A smile begets a smile.