I feel so heartbroken when I find someone who ressonates with this deepness and intensity inside, but for some reason they cannot meet me in the love field. I feel like it´s very difficult to connect with regular people, but it´s 10x harder to find someone who "gets you" and is also willing to put down their walls to let you in, because of all the trauma described in the video. It´s hard to accept the fact that you might never be trully seen and understood by your peers, and the loneliness might never go away.
I was wondering for a long time I’m a great guy and why it’s so hard to find someone and others are also surprised I’m single for a long time. Now tgat I realized I’m gifted, now I better understand why this is happening. Which solves a big puzzle and I already have long ago adjusted to being alone and it’s not that bad. Now I want to know what else I may have to look forward to or make more sense of the other things that may come with ppl. that are gifted and intense.
I feel that I absolutly can't build a relationship with someone, which mean the risk of the entire collapse of my world if I get used to that person and if she leaves. It could be impossible to survive the pain. I protect myself from it, staying well away, alone, safe. Grounded alone. Thank you so much for your work Imi Lo, you have such a just and profound comprehension and word it so well. You are a bright light in the dark. You bring a balm to my heart ♥
You pick up that the person someone lies to the most is themselves. This goes for most people. Other people either dont notice or dont bother to confront the person with the lie they tell themselves. I observe a lot of things. See patterns in behavior. Predict behavior. I have been diagnosed with autism. Maybe I put up walls around me because I picked up unresolved trauma around me in adults a could not do anything about it except shut it out. I went into my body to evoke the emotions stired in my body and break out.
It's perceptive of you.. Many people are either unaware of this self-deception or opt not to address it. Your diagnosis of autism may have influenced the way you interact with the world. Building emotional walls could be a coping mechanism, especially if you sensed unresolved trauma in adults around you. I hope you find the support an information you need!
You say don’t shield.. life is worth loving? How is that when every time I attempt to love people I’m treated like shit, dismissed and rejected. I’d rather be cold and shielded than to keep hurting like this.
I'm at the last step of an NPD abuse relationship. Being stuck in an "abandonment" state, being neglected, my reputation got damaged, and losing my moral control... In my head, I have pretty clear visions of my death, when and how. Only depends on what comes next to trigger the system. I'm glad that this article, not only reversed my suicidal system, but also taught me how to love to full, for myself.
I have been forced to accept that I'm a weirdo and will experience life alone. Society seems to suggest that we have personality problems. Maybe that is true but maybe it is more complicated. We just don't have much in common with others.
Don't give up. Remember that anyone not a weirdo in the world's eyes would never work for you. The fact that you exist is sufficient proof that someone complementary does, too. The only way you'll find them is to keep shining your light. It only takes one.
I like this in general, but the idea of settling for a life partner who is not also a soulmate makes me physically ill. I don’t even see how that’s possible, let alone desirable. I couldn’t even experience initial attraction. I feel that a partner ought to be a passion, not in a “silly” limerent way, but in a deep-soul-resonance way, much like my intellectual passions. I understand that I’ll potentially be single forever.
I love the clarity in your thinking!!! Indeed ‘settling’ for a life partner is not for everyone and I also don’t think that’s necessarily the more optimal choice. Personally I would also rather enjoy time by myself than to be with someone with whom there is misalignment on multiple levels. Thank you for your comment 🫶🏻
I am grateful to have my wife, although it is difficult to completely synergize, she keeps the loneliness at bay. Group dynamics are an entirely different beast, I can manage but feel so exhausted towards the end. It hurst because I love people and each one has a unique essence but after a certain time at a "dinner party" I start to feel overwhelmed; I try to self-coach and it works for a while, but the inevitable flight is already in motion. Is there a suggested regimen for planned isolation and socialization that Imi or anyone here has discovered?
Of course. But too big to be contained in the comment space… there are not a lot of resources for gifted adults out there but most resources on complex trauma would also to a degree be helpful
I feel so heartbroken when I find someone who ressonates with this deepness and intensity inside, but for some reason they cannot meet me in the love field. I feel like it´s very difficult to connect with regular people, but it´s 10x harder to find someone who "gets you" and is also willing to put down their walls to let you in, because of all the trauma described in the video. It´s hard to accept the fact that you might never be trully seen and understood by your peers, and the loneliness might never go away.
We are light years ahead intellectually...
"It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society."
Jidu Krishnamurti
Thank you for your work.
LOVE IT
I was wondering for a long time I’m a great guy and why it’s so hard to find someone and others are also surprised I’m single for a long time. Now tgat I realized I’m gifted, now I better understand why this is happening. Which solves a big puzzle and I already have long ago adjusted to being alone and it’s not that bad. Now I want to know what else I may have to look forward to or make more sense of the other things that may come with ppl. that are gifted and intense.
That is wonderful! I am so glad for you 🙂👊🏻
And when you find someone, and then it doesn't work out, the pain is totally blinding because it's so hard to find someone.
That’s true but that may not be a reason to give up entirely
@@ImiatEggshellTherapyCoaching i didn't imply that, nor did i think it.
I just often feel like I have dumb down. And always want more.
I feel that I absolutly can't build a relationship with someone, which mean the risk of the entire collapse of my world if I get used to that person and if she leaves. It could be impossible to survive the pain. I protect myself from it, staying well away, alone, safe. Grounded alone. Thank you so much for your work Imi Lo, you have such a just and profound comprehension and word it so well. You are a bright light in the dark. You bring a balm to my heart ♥
Whilst it’s a deeply painful experience you are describing you said it so eloquently and clearly.
Thank you for your kind words!! 🫶🏻
How about a video on such problems in non-intimate relationships, like friendships, etc.?
Suggestion taken!! Thank you 🙏
You pick up that the person someone lies to the most is themselves. This goes for most people. Other people either dont notice or dont bother to confront the person with the lie they tell themselves.
I observe a lot of things. See patterns in behavior. Predict behavior.
I have been diagnosed with autism. Maybe I put up walls around me because I picked up unresolved trauma around me in adults a could not do anything about it except shut it out. I went into my body to evoke the emotions stired in my body and break out.
It's perceptive of you.. Many people are either unaware of this self-deception or opt not to address it.
Your diagnosis of autism may have influenced the way you interact with the world. Building emotional walls could be a coping mechanism, especially if you sensed unresolved trauma in adults around you. I hope you find the support an information you need!
You say don’t shield.. life is worth loving? How is that when every time I attempt to love people I’m treated like shit, dismissed and rejected. I’d rather be cold and shielded than to keep hurting like this.
This is describes my entire life sadly.
Me too
I'm at the last step of an NPD abuse relationship. Being stuck in an "abandonment" state, being neglected, my reputation got damaged, and losing my moral control...
In my head, I have pretty clear visions of my death, when and how. Only depends on what comes next to trigger the system.
I'm glad that this article, not only reversed my suicidal system, but also taught me how to love to full, for myself.
I have been forced to accept that I'm a weirdo and will experience life alone. Society seems to suggest that we have personality problems. Maybe that is true but maybe it is more complicated. We just don't have much in common with others.
Don't give up. Remember that anyone not a weirdo in the world's eyes would never work for you. The fact that you exist is sufficient proof that someone complementary does, too. The only way you'll find them is to keep shining your light. It only takes one.
I like this in general, but the idea of settling for a life partner who is not also a soulmate makes me physically ill. I don’t even see how that’s possible, let alone desirable. I couldn’t even experience initial attraction. I feel that a partner ought to be a passion, not in a “silly” limerent way, but in a deep-soul-resonance way, much like my intellectual passions. I understand that I’ll potentially be single forever.
I love the clarity in your thinking!!! Indeed ‘settling’ for a life partner is not for everyone and I also don’t think that’s necessarily the more optimal choice.
Personally I would also rather enjoy time by myself than to be with someone with whom there is misalignment on multiple levels. Thank you for your comment 🫶🏻
Kinda wish I could just make a transcript of this my dating profile
Haha you can . Not that I suggest it 🤞😄
Thank you so much for this content. You have an amazing gift of instantiating deep experience into words.
Aww thank you so much for your kind words!!!!
I am grateful to have my wife, although it is difficult to completely synergize, she keeps the loneliness at bay. Group dynamics are an entirely different beast, I can manage but feel so exhausted towards the end. It hurst because I love people and each one has a unique essence but after a certain time at a "dinner party" I start to feel overwhelmed; I try to self-coach and it works for a while, but the inevitable flight is already in motion. Is there a suggested regimen for planned isolation and socialization that Imi or anyone here has discovered?
Thank you so much for this video. It really helps me understand myself better.
I am very glad to know that!
Thank you whole heartedly for this video! 🖤
You are so welcome!🤗 thank you wholeheartedly for stopping by!!
Is there advice for people who are gifted and have issues of intimacy due to childhood trauma?
Of course. But too big to be contained in the comment space… there are not a lot of resources for gifted adults out there but most resources on complex trauma would also to a degree be helpful
@@ImiatEggshellTherapyCoaching Yes, thank you.
He goes on about someones partner. Loneliness is not having a partner.
Any resources out there for two gifted adults in a romantic relationship?
Not that I can readily think of but I think there should be a demand!
Dating? Hahahaha!