Hi Dr Tasha!!! Though I could never express my true feelings that how immensively your research, TED Talks and much more about self-awareness changed my viewpoint about what is coming into my life by proposing the world simplest and cute recipe as "Asking for WHAT instead of WHY". You are truely a wonder woman, brave lady and inspiring soul. Keep it up with the same VIBES please!!!
I always ask why. Why did I say that, why did I think that, why did I do that, then I ask what. What was I feeling at that time that made me react in such a way? What was the environment I was in that made me feel like that? What was my internal dialogue!?
I'm not always the most self-aware, but I still think I was moderately aware of myself enough that I still ended up avoiding the biggest kind of blunders that you can encounter in a social situation. I've learned a lot about this topic over the last few years from curiosities sake, simply because it interested me, I genuinely enjoy trying to understand empathy, what it is, and how someone becomes empathetic, or what makes an empathetic person. I genuinely want to be someone who is a genuinely kind and caring person and that is why I enjoy learning about these things. Either way, I have more time on my hands nowadays since I no longer have to deal with one of the people who has been stalking me the most for years. Some like to say I'm "blind" because of my lack of awareness over people manipulating me, but I think that's the point of manipulators, either way I haven't been seeing the person who has been harassing me for years. Not sure if they've genuinely stopped or are lurking or coming near me undercover, but either way I haven't been seeing them, so I just figure they've stopped. I've actually started doing other things and my depression has vastly improved in general. I still get bullied by other people still so if I spend too much time online them insulting me still gets to me, but I haven't been acting as negatively as they think I've been. I have been feeling overall stressed lately. I've been minding my own business and had a good holiday. I'm not happy with who I am as a person, or my choices. I have noticed some being kinder to me, but it still frustrates me that people ignore that I want to be left alone. I kind of feel like it's not me people are reacting to sometimes. People are still gas lighting me. I've learned a lot about what kind of person I am from this experience, I think I've gotten worse in some ways, and better in others, but overall I'm not happy with who I've become and I miss the person I used to be. The old me was a better person. I still get abused, and yes, I'm a clumsy person, but I was still nicer than I am now. I also still get abused and I don't see anyone trying to make it stop.
Listening to Tasha, it took me a while to break the patterns. They are starting to break. What God keeps telling me is, “Mikey, you are not a hostage! Let go of people, forgive yourself, and move forward.”
From my experience in the workplace, people with no self-awareness are the most difficult to try to develop. Short of telling them to their faces that they have no self awareness, they really can’t take a hint I find.
I think one should be very cautious about asking feedback from other people . How other people see you is filtered by their own insecurities envies and their perception of reality. I think one should only ask very special people that you trust their judgement . It is sacred space. Think long and hard before asking such questions. If you have one or two people whose judgement you trust and have your best interest at heart you are very fortunate. The word is “self “awareness.
The first 2 points, I wholeheartedly agree with. However the 3rd, is concerning. What not why…puts it into an either/or category and is limiting. Maybe the context/tone/approach of “why” needs to be addressed, however, “why” is still enormously helpful. Let’s ask why AND what. Ask the why under the why, under the why, all the way to exploring the deep subconscious programming and core wounds. If “why” is asked in a shaming, accusatory, way…of course that won’t help. If “why” is asked in a deeply curious, interested, open way, then it can often direct a more meaningful “what”. Having worked in medicine, with thousands of people, and now exploring pursing a neuroscience degree…the “why” should never be substituted. It should be included.
Agreed. I had the same question in mind. People have a picture of you painted in their minds, not as you actually are but of who they think you are. I've been 'name called' countless times..I've been called selfish for instance. But what I have consistently noticed by looking at my actions and the intentions behind them; I find that I do not at all fit that description. I think external feedback can more often than not be inaccurate as people usually get to see a one dimensional version of you. They do not see the thought and intention that goes behind your actions.
I would ask the question as if its someone else you care about wants to know. This way they'll tend to be more objective. Asking for you they'll cover for your feelings so as not to hurt you.
Should ask people who are constantly with you , either working or doing activities etc. they must have a better insight which is based on what you are doing
I'm enchanted by this content. I recently read a similar book, and I was truly enchanted. "Mindful Mastery: Living Intentionally in a Chaotic World" by Kyle Ash
"Other people can see us far more objectively than we see ourself" lol no, other people are merely viewing an object, and you are not an object you are a viewer.
At 1:17 “why” is asking for root cause or what’s my motivation. “What” is asking for solutions or action to take. I really don’t see how asking what is the better question for self-awareness UNLESS you are simply looking for the solution to use problem in front of you.
Your second suggestion made me laugh, First, because people hate to give real feedbacks. Second, because the majority of them only knows you subjectively. You can’t drive people outside of themselves to self knowledge. Jung was a hermit for three years. Self-observation is the only way. Read Ouspenski, Gurdjieff and all the spiritualized people with contact with their higher selves. They had to integrate their shadow first. It’s all inner work.
1 you want to know the truth
2 ask for feedback
3 ask what not why
^ legend, dont have to watch this shit anymore
🙌🏽
Hi Dr Tasha!!! Though I could never express my true feelings that how immensively your research, TED Talks and much more about self-awareness changed my viewpoint about what is coming into my life by proposing the world simplest and cute recipe as "Asking for WHAT instead of WHY". You are truely a wonder woman, brave lady and inspiring soul. Keep it up with the same VIBES please!!!
simp
I always ask why. Why did I say that, why did I think that, why did I do that, then I ask what. What was I feeling at that time that made me react in such a way? What was the environment I was in that made me feel like that? What was my internal dialogue!?
I'm not always the most self-aware, but I still think I was moderately aware of myself enough that I still ended up avoiding the biggest kind of blunders that you can encounter in a social situation. I've learned a lot about this topic over the last few years from curiosities sake, simply because it interested me, I genuinely enjoy trying to understand empathy, what it is, and how someone becomes empathetic, or what makes an empathetic person. I genuinely want to be someone who is a genuinely kind and caring person and that is why I enjoy learning about these things. Either way, I have more time on my hands nowadays since I no longer have to deal with one of the people who has been stalking me the most for years. Some like to say I'm "blind" because of my lack of awareness over people manipulating me, but I think that's the point of manipulators, either way I haven't been seeing the person who has been harassing me for years. Not sure if they've genuinely stopped or are lurking or coming near me undercover, but either way I haven't been seeing them, so I just figure they've stopped. I've actually started doing other things and my depression has vastly improved in general. I still get bullied by other people still so if I spend too much time online them insulting me still gets to me, but I haven't been acting as negatively as they think I've been. I have been feeling overall stressed lately. I've been minding my own business and had a good holiday. I'm not happy with who I am as a person, or my choices. I have noticed some being kinder to me, but it still frustrates me that people ignore that I want to be left alone. I kind of feel like it's not me people are reacting to sometimes. People are still gas lighting me. I've learned a lot about what kind of person I am from this experience, I think I've gotten worse in some ways, and better in others, but overall I'm not happy with who I've become and I miss the person I used to be. The old me was a better person. I still get abused, and yes, I'm a clumsy person, but I was still nicer than I am now. I also still get abused and I don't see anyone trying to make it stop.
Great book and incredibly interesting discoveries
Listening to Tasha, it took me a while to break the patterns. They are starting to break. What God keeps telling me is, “Mikey, you are not a hostage! Let go of people, forgive yourself, and move forward.”
I loved the 3rd point of asking what instead of why. Although I'd say to ask both
From my experience in the workplace, people with no self-awareness are the most difficult to try to develop. Short of telling them to their faces that they have no self awareness, they really can’t take a hint I find.
Her ted talk is also very nice...Thanks a lot for sharing
I think one should be very cautious about asking feedback from other people . How other people see you is filtered by their own insecurities envies and their perception of reality. I think one should only ask very special people that you trust their judgement . It is sacred space. Think long and hard before asking such questions. If you have one or two people whose judgement you trust and have your best interest at heart you are very fortunate. The word is “self “awareness.
Once a genius said:- a wise man is always intuitive with a action based on the question " what's needed to be done?"
It seems like a super power to be able to answer the actual questions.
just watched your TED talk. Very simply thank you. Changing why to what...WORKS!
Wow it almost immediately worked! Thanks!
It is a amazing video.Thank you for sharing it with us
Amazing book and amazing research
Thanks for sharing!
Thank you, Tasha!:)
I love your book! Thank you.😁
The first 2 points, I wholeheartedly agree with.
However the 3rd, is concerning.
What not why…puts it into an either/or category and is limiting.
Maybe the context/tone/approach of “why” needs to be addressed, however, “why” is still enormously helpful. Let’s ask why AND what.
Ask the why under the why, under the why, all the way to exploring the deep subconscious programming and core wounds. If “why” is asked in a shaming, accusatory, way…of course that won’t help. If “why” is asked in a deeply curious, interested, open way, then it can often direct a more meaningful “what”.
Having worked in medicine, with thousands of people, and now exploring pursing a neuroscience degree…the “why” should never be substituted. It should be included.
Great work
If most ppl are delusional how can they give us feedback ?
Agreed. I had the same question in mind. People have a picture of you painted in their minds, not as you actually are but of who they think you are. I've been 'name called' countless times..I've been called selfish for instance. But what I have consistently noticed by looking at my actions and the intentions behind them; I find that I do not at all fit that description. I think external feedback can more often than not be inaccurate as people usually get to see a one dimensional version of you. They do not see the thought and intention that goes behind your actions.
I would ask the question as if its someone else you care about wants to know. This way they'll tend to be more objective. Asking for you they'll cover for your feelings so as not to hurt you.
Should ask people who are constantly with you , either working or doing activities etc. they must have a better insight which is based on what you are doing
First stop being lazy and type words properly. Do not ruin the English language. Thanks
We are more delusional w ourselves than others tbh
Hi. How do you ask someone for feedback without sounding a bit wired ?
I'm enchanted by this content. I recently read a similar book, and I was truly enchanted. "Mindful Mastery: Living Intentionally in a Chaotic World" by Kyle Ash
With the exception of the artificial and abstract thinker in you, you are pure Nature.
How can I connect with you Tasha?!
how in the world do you even go about measuring self-awareness, how could that data ever be accurate?
How can I talk to her
How much do you know about yourself? Take aways of self awareness ---
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Tasha marry me 😍
"Other people can see us far more objectively than we see ourself" lol no, other people are merely viewing an object, and you are not an object you are a viewer.
What is unicorn
At 1:17 “why” is asking for root cause or what’s my motivation.
“What” is asking for solutions or action to take.
I really don’t see how asking what is the better question for self-awareness UNLESS you are simply looking for the solution to use problem in front of you.
Your second suggestion made me laugh, First, because people hate to give real feedbacks. Second, because the majority of them only knows you subjectively.
You can’t drive people outside of themselves to self knowledge.
Jung was a hermit for three years. Self-observation is the only way. Read Ouspenski, Gurdjieff and all the spiritualized people with contact with their higher selves.
They had to integrate their shadow first.
It’s all inner work.
Sa My Orbicularis Oris 😘
Okay. So name a person who is NOT a "unicorn", by your definition.
I think she needs more self Awareness her self.. so confusing
The piece of hair on her side of the face annoyed me....
Do you realize your own potential? If not, it's never too late. Recognize & activate from now onwards -- th-cam.com/video/2nKu0qpdrbw/w-d-xo.html