Wendy Behary is such an intelegent, loving and giving person I can only feel love and respect. My heart goes out to all the clúster B individuals. I include co-dependents in this group apart from accepted boxes at the time. Boxes are the desperate try do get controle, if it's done in a productive therapeutic intention it might be adequate to a degree. There are people who claim psychologie is a science, that's magical thinking and grandious. Therapy is often done in an entitlement to be the light in the dark, entitlement is the wall between conection. Supervision is the therapy of the therapist from a therapist who needs supervisión. Wendy does the only form of therapy, she brings her soul. In a human funcional society, productive heart work, labour, friends and family had done that a Long time ago. Now we need payed emotional hookers. I match all the boxes of clúster B. We have to define it as «co-morbidity». The truth is it is prove I don't suffer from a personality disorder. Nothing manifestó as a pattern. I can empathies with all cluster B's. It is such a dark, helpless space to be, dettached from reality and exausting, is the urge not to live. Shame is to most ugly feeling a man could have. There is no physical pain that could match it. Shame has to be felt like pain to change behaviour. Toxic shame is from the past, it produces no change, you can't change the past or shame from others, it is pain for no reason. It reminds me to be a German, toxic shame abused to dominate millons of disordered people there by an institution. It is dangerous to be not a sothiopath depending on the actual society. It might be not being a Nazi, to be that was defiend healty and pro social from 1933-1945. I am a man, 57, I was a Germán. As a baby they took me to child forsters. It was torture right in the 60ies. Twenty years after holocaust. Now they admit child forsters abuse, they wanted to pay me, but they didn't. I became some kinda rich, I don't need it. I deaply love peace, but I can't make it on my own, but I am okay with them. But I don't have to stay a German. I am at peace no more being a Germán. I am blessed from God. I have a very good memory. I can remember banging my head against the wall, shaking my head trying to sleep, cuz the pulse in my eras was so loud, in the morning waking up in galons of sweat as a two years old. I acted autistic, couldn't walk or speak as a 3 years old. I remember having electrodes around my head, finding the EEG was normal. I felt abused. They did IQ-Tests, I was many years ahead. I couldn't write or read up to 12 years old, they did further IQ-tests. They made me an Einstein and tourtured me with a élite school and a God I didn't know at that time. At 16 I ran away to France. I did it after looking at my baby fotos and my fotos of my infancy. I saw a beautiful handsome guy, the face did not smile, but his eyes were loughing. On some fotos there was a smirk, that I loved. The head was straight looking into a future, there was so much confidance and dignity in this little boy. I had such a deap sence of humor all my life. I had empathy for myself and I wanted to rescue that little guy. The slave now was strong enough to break the chains. I became a violent street kid from the élite school spelling several languages. I had only one contact with the police with out a passport in a foreign country. I never did alcohol or drugs and kept my body strong. I was intelligent enough to leave the streets. But I knew the worth of freedom now. I was very handsome and I went with middle aged women to sustain me, that was abuse on both sides and I learned what real insanity was. I needed a passport, I needed some work, my most exploiteable skill was fighting like a psychopath. I went to the legion. I went to combat in África. What I did was acting like a psychpath but I wasn't. I know this cuz there were many psychopaths on both sides. I appreciate them, they can be very loyal, they are not that dramatic and they are predictible. It is easy to survive and get along with them. In my off days I regressed to the autist I was in my infancy, I observed, didn't engage allways with my very own sense of humor. I didn't cought any cPTSD. I felt save cuz I was respected by psychopaths. I asked myself why to kill people for another country in a whole other contry? I went to qualify for special operation for more freedom. I was able to save lifes there cuz there was less controle. I was still a boy and I have proved to me there is a power in me, to change situations and my behaviour. Girls loved me to death, I needed love and intimicy. I acted out of character like a narc or borderline. I was highly abusive and aware, it hurt so much I loved them so much. Up to my early twenties I was like that. I left them cuz I loved them they couldn't leave me. This beautiful girls loved me, they made me a man. I can't say how thankful I am. I allways hated violance, I became a professional musician. I was technically mediocre, but all the pain and all the humor of my being was in it. I was in a giant door of succsess, I didn't go through it, I didn't want to share all this with so many people. I was able to be vulnerable but what the codependent doesn't understand is: You can't over share that with every one. The people I was with were extreme lefties and consum drugs, they were delutional. I was physically a fighting machine but I was allways a real lefty they were not they clarinete to be. I wanted to become a psychotherapist. It was even a bigger shock at University as in the military. It was a more delutional fake envirement. I saw people using drugs and alcohol not able to pass the little statistic examen over years. They were there cuz they thought they can hide from productividad and results. I was exited by Schema-Therapie (a very Germán Word) to help people to find the way out of pain like the little boy I was did a Long time ago. I was prepaired to suffer for that gol. I ended my first examen, but I couldn't bare the suffering being in this envirement any longer. I was very trained to leave, two professors bagged me to stay cuz I was writing a book with them. I wanted to become a medical doctor. I became a medical doctor. After that I heared nobody thought from the students I was able to do such a hard task. I stayed friends with one of the professors, he was the only one who knew I could do it, he was the only one who knew my whole story, like you dear reader, he knew I would become a great medical doctor. He was the father I never saw. If you are a great medical doctor you can't work in Germany, the crimes are more surviere than war crimes in that system. I did it for over 20 years and like a soldier I tryed to do no harm. Impossible. I have no cPTSD. A heart task to do if you don't want to end up in jail. I left a thousend times, this time Europe and my profession, even a system of psychopathy abusing disordered narcs to do the shity work. It is a story of inconsistancy. Calling it that way might hurt me, if it is intended to hurt me, I will give you that. I learned to embrace pain, I get so much power of change out of it. I invite you to read this again and go on this journey with me, you are allowed to take your empathy with you on board on OUR way. I see a man with smiling eyes, a big sense of humor and a boy who takes himself not that serious, who doesn't belive every thing he thinks, who allways hated violance and harm, who wanted to react on healthy shame to become a better version each day. I can't imaginé helping adults any more. I life in the freedom of South America. I have to support street kids, it is so much work to do, there is no energy left for adults. My sociopathy is grounded on a socialism that takes care of people who can't help themselfs, not of lazy people who should take care of themselfs with the further duty to help others. I am talking about adults. If there is energy left I have to care for animals, that can't help themselfs. I would love to have a family and 15 kids, I would love them, I would teach them all I know if they are interested, I would defend them, I would set them free when grown up. But I could not find a feminine woman that isn't currupted by the insane current system disapiring thies days. My talent as a doc isn't used for money or the great pharma, it is dedicated to kids and poor people. It touched my wired sense of humor, that I felt victim of a hot clúster B girl right in paradise, but she didn't cut that deap with the knife that was a gift of me for her, she didn't pull the trigger of my fully loaded 9 mm, not at her face not at my face for me leaving her. It is the core of humanity wanting to help, but we should dicide wisely, who to help first. With joy, happiness and wired humor Desde Sudamérica
Both of my Parents have Narcissistic Personality diosorder! They totally traumatized me and my Brother and destroyed our lives! Should I have empathy with them? They have zero insight and no accountability! ALL focus should be on their victims first and foremost imo!!! I don't care why they do what they do - they do it! And they hurt People Very badly!
Wendy Behary is such an intelegent, loving and giving person I can only feel love and respect.
My heart goes out to all the clúster B individuals.
I include co-dependents in this group apart from accepted boxes at the time.
Boxes are the desperate try do get controle, if it's done in a productive therapeutic intention it might be adequate to a degree.
There are people who claim psychologie is a science, that's magical thinking and grandious.
Therapy is often done in an entitlement to be the light in the dark, entitlement is the wall between conection.
Supervision is the therapy of the therapist from a therapist who needs supervisión.
Wendy does the only form of therapy, she brings her soul. In a human funcional society, productive heart work, labour, friends and family had done that a Long time ago. Now we need payed emotional hookers.
I match all the boxes of clúster B. We have to define it as «co-morbidity». The truth is it is prove I don't suffer from a personality disorder. Nothing manifestó as a pattern. I can empathies with all cluster B's. It is such a dark, helpless space to be, dettached from reality and exausting, is the urge not to live. Shame is to most ugly feeling a man could have. There is no physical pain that could match it. Shame has to be felt like pain to change behaviour. Toxic shame is from the past, it produces no change, you can't change the past or shame from others, it is pain for no reason. It reminds me to be a German, toxic shame abused to dominate millons of disordered people there by an institution. It is dangerous to be not a sothiopath depending on the actual society. It might be not being a Nazi, to be that was defiend healty and pro social from 1933-1945.
I am a man, 57, I was a Germán. As a baby they took me to child forsters. It was torture right in the 60ies. Twenty years after holocaust. Now they admit child forsters abuse, they wanted to pay me, but they didn't. I became some kinda rich, I don't need it. I deaply love peace, but I can't make it on my own, but I am okay with them. But I don't have to stay a German. I am at peace no more being a Germán. I am blessed from God. I have a very good memory. I can remember banging my head against the wall, shaking my head trying to sleep, cuz the pulse in my eras was so loud, in the morning waking up in galons of sweat as a two years old.
I acted autistic, couldn't walk or speak as a 3 years old. I remember having electrodes around my head, finding the EEG was normal. I felt abused. They did IQ-Tests, I was many years ahead. I couldn't write or read up to 12 years old, they did further IQ-tests. They made me an Einstein and tourtured me with a élite school and a God I didn't know at that time.
At 16 I ran away to France. I did it after looking at my baby fotos and my fotos of my infancy.
I saw a beautiful handsome guy, the face did not smile, but his eyes were loughing. On some fotos there was a smirk, that I loved. The head was straight looking into a future, there was so much confidance and dignity in this little boy. I had such a deap sence of humor all my life. I had empathy for myself and I wanted to rescue that little guy. The slave now was strong enough to break the chains. I became a violent street kid from the élite school spelling several languages. I had only one contact with the police with out a passport in a foreign country. I never did alcohol or drugs and kept my body strong. I was intelligent enough to leave the streets. But I knew the worth of freedom now. I was very handsome and I went with middle aged women to sustain me, that was abuse on both sides and I learned what real insanity was.
I needed a passport, I needed some work, my most exploiteable skill was fighting like a psychopath.
I went to the legion. I went to combat in África.
What I did was acting like a psychpath but I wasn't. I know this cuz there were many psychopaths on both sides. I appreciate them, they can be very loyal, they are not that dramatic and they are predictible. It is easy to survive and get along with them. In my off days I regressed to the autist I was in my infancy, I observed, didn't engage allways with my very own sense of humor. I didn't cought any cPTSD.
I felt save cuz I was respected by psychopaths.
I asked myself why to kill people for another country in a whole other contry? I went to qualify for special operation for more freedom. I was able to save lifes there cuz there was less controle. I was still a boy and I have proved to me there is a power in me, to change situations and my behaviour.
Girls loved me to death, I needed love and intimicy.
I acted out of character like a narc or borderline. I was highly abusive and aware, it hurt so much I loved them so much. Up to my early twenties I was like that. I left them cuz I loved them they couldn't leave me. This beautiful girls loved me, they made me a man. I can't say how thankful I am.
I allways hated violance, I became a professional musician. I was technically mediocre, but all the pain and all the humor of my being was in it. I was in a giant door of succsess, I didn't go through it, I didn't want to share all this with so many people. I was able to be vulnerable but what the codependent doesn't understand is: You can't over share that with every one. The people I was with were extreme lefties and consum drugs, they were delutional. I was physically a fighting machine but I was allways a real lefty they were not they clarinete to be. I wanted to become a psychotherapist.
It was even a bigger shock at University as in the military. It was a more delutional fake envirement. I saw people using drugs and alcohol not able to pass the little statistic examen over years. They were there cuz they thought they can hide from productividad and results. I was exited by Schema-Therapie (a very Germán Word) to help people to find the way out of pain like the little boy I was did a Long time ago. I was prepaired to suffer for that gol. I ended my first examen, but I couldn't bare the suffering being in this envirement any longer. I was very trained to leave, two professors bagged me to stay cuz I was writing a book with them.
I wanted to become a medical doctor. I became a medical doctor. After that I heared nobody thought from the students I was able to do such a hard task.
I stayed friends with one of the professors, he was the only one who knew I could do it, he was the only one who knew my whole story, like you dear reader, he knew I would become a great medical doctor. He was the father I never saw.
If you are a great medical doctor you can't work in Germany, the crimes are more surviere than war crimes in that system. I did it for over 20 years and like a soldier I tryed to do no harm. Impossible. I have no cPTSD. A heart task to do if you don't want to end up in jail.
I left a thousend times, this time Europe and my profession, even a system of psychopathy abusing disordered narcs to do the shity work.
It is a story of inconsistancy. Calling it that way might hurt me, if it is intended to hurt me, I will give you that. I learned to embrace pain, I get so much power of change out of it. I invite you to read this again and go on this journey with me, you are allowed to take your empathy with you on board on OUR way.
I see a man with smiling eyes, a big sense of humor and a boy who takes himself not that serious, who doesn't belive every thing he thinks, who allways hated violance and harm, who wanted to react on healthy shame to become a better version each day.
I can't imaginé helping adults any more. I life in the freedom of South America. I have to support street kids, it is so much work to do, there is no energy left for adults. My sociopathy is grounded on a socialism that takes care of people who can't help themselfs, not of lazy people who should take care of themselfs with the further duty to help others. I am talking about adults. If there is energy left I have to care for animals, that can't help themselfs.
I would love to have a family and 15 kids, I would love them, I would teach them all I know if they are interested, I would defend them, I would set them free when grown up. But I could not find a feminine woman that isn't currupted by the insane current system disapiring thies days.
My talent as a doc isn't used for money or the great pharma, it is dedicated to kids and poor people.
It touched my wired sense of humor, that I felt victim of a hot clúster B girl right in paradise, but she didn't cut that deap with the knife that was a gift of me for her, she didn't pull the trigger of my fully loaded 9 mm, not at her face not at my face for me leaving her.
It is the core of humanity wanting to help, but we should dicide wisely, who to help first.
With joy, happiness and wired humor
Desde Sudamérica
38:26 I don't agree. you are not an admirable human being because of your achievements
you are an admirable human because of you character and values!
Both of my Parents have Narcissistic Personality diosorder!
They totally traumatized me and my Brother and destroyed our lives!
Should I have empathy with them? They have zero insight and no accountability!
ALL focus should be on their victims first and foremost imo!!!
I don't care why they do what they do - they do it! And they hurt People Very badly!