Almond fact 3: Recently scientist were able to create a synthetic almond, it was identical to an almond in every way except for the fact that it wasn’t real.
I got through the entire video, counting, posted my identical comment and then saw yours and deleted it out of frustration. You have ruined my day, sir. But I still love you.
Now when you say that are you counting the first instead as a repeat or are you starting the count after the first utterance of the word? Depending on the answer we might be looking at a faulty statistic here.
Rumour has it that not only are decoy almonds real, but they're so effective at their job that they're completely indistinguishable from real almonds. Any of us may have had a decoy almond and never realized it even after it was too late.
Not enough people get this. It takes 1 1/2 gallons of water to make 1 almond. 80% of almonds come from California, 1 of the most drought-stricken states in the country. I suggest we plant almonds in Louisiana & Mississippi, which see too much water.
This is the first time I've watched content from this channel. I was fooled for almost two minutes, thinking this was an actual deep dive into almond life. Bravo :)
I just can't stop laughing at the method used to introduce decoy almonds at 1:45 "Here's a multiple choice question. Did you answer bamboozle? Well, you're wrong. The answer was double-bamboozle."
Man! This is a classic. A narrator making funny jokes that everyone loves to the point where this chanle actually get paid big boi money. Not that stuff that compares to loose change. Honestly this stuff is hilarious! You're chanle is great my dude!
This is the second time I’ve mistaken this channel’s videos for true videos on how something’s made. I’m ashamed that each time it has taken me longer than it should’ve to realize it’s purely comedic.
yellow almonds are sent straight to almond hell where they are updated on current world affairs and their fear is used to power the factory for all eternity
I just lost it when he said "high-income families can pay a substantial premium to have first dibs on the almonds they want. for a smaller fee, you can pull this level that makes some almonds spill out"
0:21 As a Californian, almonds are definitely not a guilt- free snack. For what they're worth (calorie and protein content) it takes WAY too much water to grow and maintain the trees. Made worse since farms tend to be in the dry desert areas that desperately need water (as opposed to the more fertile valleys that collect mountain water) since land prices are (were?) rising and desert land is cheaper.
I bet the room with all the shaking machines disoriented a few workers in a factory because whenever I thought it looked like the entire room was shaking
"there's no such thing as decoy almonds"
Sounds like something a decoy almond would say
Asian almonds
Liam M I opened the link and then I am not proud to say I continued to Browse amazon and found myself looking at fleshlights
Liam M OMG ITS DECOY ALMONDS EVERYONE DOWN
The big almond companies only want you to think that decoy almonds don't exist, don't accept their bourgeoisie lies.
@@insertmemorableusernameher6795 wise man
“The yellow almonds are sent to almond hell.”
What about reds? O-O
@Kyntiz I can adopt you
@@Voidlingstudiosofficial Mexico
@@jacaredosvudu1638 i guess
@jacaredosvudu1638 seems.................................................good.
I wish big eddy would soothe me with his gentle touch
Don’t we all
agree
I need big eddy's gentle touch
I thought I was asexual, but after this video I realized, I'm big eddy sexual
Big eddy should give big ed some relationship advice
"Decoy almonds don't exist..."
"Or do they..."
Hey, Vsauce. Michael here.
@Awesome Foxes shit they found out about the rat poi-I mean some are, that’s crazy
Why did i hear that
th-cam.com/video/TN25ghkfgQA/w-d-xo.html
"Do 'decoy almonds' really exist?"
hellow fellow Vsauce fan-
Almonds come in 2 varieties:
Real
&
Fake
but decoy almonds don't exist
@@sci_pain3409 or do they?
Real and also definitely real*
Almond fact 3: Recently scientist were able to create a synthetic almond, it was identical to an almond in every way except for the fact that it wasn’t real.
And pistachio
“Why is the grid vibrating?”
“idntknw.....”
¯\_༼ •́ ͜ʖ •̀ ༽_/¯
Seems legit
2:13
Whydntyuuse o's
One of life's greatest mysteries
Almond doesn't sound like a word anymore at this point
All I can hear is "ahmods"
It sounds like *the only word*
Almond.
@@puchu_5001 the word robe works too
Almonds are a way of life.
jaime vu
fun fact: the word "almond" is repeated 58 times throughout this video
lmao did you count it
I got through the entire video, counting, posted my identical comment and then saw yours and deleted it out of frustration. You have ruined my day, sir. But I still love you.
Also, I counted 58 as well
Is that with or without the plurals?
Now when you say that are you counting the first instead as a repeat or are you starting the count after the first utterance of the word? Depending on the answer we might be looking at a faulty statistic here.
if you werent listening this one is the most convincing out of all the episodes of how its actually made.
what about the april fools one
@@Templarfreak "one of"
@@TheRedNaxelaTH-cam?
@Jakub Klimczak I like the part where the camera zooms in on Big Eddie, showing his immaculately rendered pores
Nope, the laptop one is
Rumour has it that not only are decoy almonds real, but they're so effective at their job that they're completely indistinguishable from real almonds. Any of us may have had a decoy almond and never realized it even after it was too late.
I ate too many almonds and now I have 15 children
Happens
69th like ;)
it ain't called almond *milk* for nothin ;)
All I got was mild cyanide poisoning
AgentTasmania gimme
I’m glad to see that we’ve come so far in humanity. We’re no longer overfishing almonds. It’s much easier to make them.
"Decoy almonds dont exist"
*decoy almond teleports behind you*
"Mommy I want some almonds!"
"We have almonds at home."
Almonds at home:
...or do they?
Decoy almonds don't exist they can't hurt you
Decoy almonds: hehe
NUThing personal, kid
@@EmperorSal a decoy almond is just a rock painted and shaped to look like an almond, almost no one can tell the difference
"Almonds are a guilt-free snack"
_cries in hydrologist_
_cries in nevadan_
*cries*
Not enough people get this. It takes 1 1/2 gallons of water to make 1 almond. 80% of almonds come from California, 1 of the most drought-stricken states in the country.
I suggest we plant almonds in Louisiana & Mississippi, which see too much water.
@@CrayfishYAY we need a really big pipe😂
Damn I can’t believe Y’all got Big Eddie on the show, what an honor it must have been to meet him in person.
@@mistaowickkuh6249 Lies!! All lies!!
This is the first time I've watched content from this channel. I was fooled for almost two minutes, thinking this was an actual deep dive into almond life. Bravo :)
I also want to be soothed by Big Eddie's _gentle touch._
Don’t we all
I know i do
Me too
Those italics threaten me.
"Fun fact: this conveyor belt isn't actually moving at all. Our camera man just has Parkinson's Disease"
"In an effort to advance robotic science, this robot has been programmed to randomly eat almonds. So far it has advance nothing!"
One day
“ but decoy almonds don’t exist haha... “
“ . . . *or do they* “
Vsauce music hits
Hey, VSauce, Michael here.
Almond Fact :
where did all of the almonds go
can someone please find them
They’re in almond hell
I found the almonds!!! They are all staying at *[redacted]*
Hmm that's very interesting 🤔🤔 makes you think
brONZOS NOOOOO
they were illegally dumped into the almond sea
“And any yellow almonds are sent to almond hell” that caught me off guard, I laughed so hard.
Alright. Now it's time to do "How It's Made: Babies"
I feel i see this every video xD
Andrew get your ass to work
Alright, when a Mommy and Daddy love each other very much...............
@@zachatck64 I wanna see a video😈
Can't wait to see 👀👀😂😂
I just can't stop laughing at the method used to introduce decoy almonds at 1:45
"Here's a multiple choice question. Did you answer bamboozle? Well, you're wrong. The answer was double-bamboozle."
huggbees is the only thing that brings me happiness today
I'm sorry.
Big eddy’s soothing touch tho 😳
bum
What happened to dipper? Lmao
Oh same
God bless Eddie and his soft touch.
the most well known
varieties of almond are
-sweet
-bitter
-round
i am disappointed no one has seemed to understand the joke
You forgot decoy
You forgot that bitter is actually cyanide
and finally, special sanguine almonds.
Why do I see you everywhere?
- French
"They inject almonds with cyanide to ensure freshness and deathness."
when he said it sent a chill down my spine...
I work at the Almond Factory, and I can 100% confirm this is exactly how it's made.
Do decoy almonds exist?
Next episode of the podcast will be called "The Great Decoy Almond Conspiracy"
Jamiroquai, nice.
This is the greatest almond of all time.
Among Us: Almond edition
jamiroquai nice
Me: * eats almond*
Big Eddy: * laughs *
Me: * Looks Down at Almond Box * "ITS A SHAM!!!" * FLIPS TABLE *
Are you high? Wtf this mean?
Anyone feels like they're being watched by almonds?
Yes
yaboydylen552
Me too a feel their beady almond eyes wh-agghhffgffvvdfgbfh
*sound of death*
Only decoy almonds, which is weird because they do not exist.
That’s just nutty.
theyre not real
This guy sounds like me when I'm supposed to present something I didn't prepare for
Dammit I was so expecting the "or do they" in the end and it still caught me offguard because of the long pause
“Why is it vibrating? Idk”
That sounds like a welcome to Nightvale line
I screamed when I saw this in my recommended. This does put a smile on my face.
Man! This is a classic.
A narrator making funny jokes that everyone loves to the point where this chanle actually get paid big boi money. Not that stuff that compares to loose change.
Honestly this stuff is hilarious!
You're chanle is great my dude!
That bit about the almond eating robot hella got me.
I seriously love these videos, they always give me a good laugh.
1:57 “You're not just wrong, you're stupid”.
the “Decoy Almond” incident. June 4, 2021
Dude, whenever I'm having a bad day you turn up and make me smile
Just in time for my almond book report. Easy A+.
This is the second time I’ve mistaken this channel’s videos for true videos on how something’s made. I’m ashamed that each time it has taken me longer than it should’ve to realize it’s purely comedic.
"More than 80% of the world's almonds come from California, where conditions are ideal for shipping trucks."
Its the subtle jabs that hit the hardest.
Directions unclear,
I’m giving my pet almond salt baths regularly but his skin isn’t improving. Please help me!
The videos get better and funnier every time. Thumbs up for the creativity.
3:42 This robot has been programmed to randomly eat almonds
So far it has advanced *nothing*
"Here is a sample of the finest almonds"
*An assortment of things that are Definitely Not Almonds*
When he asked which were a decoy I was like they all are almonds don't exist.
for conditions best suited for delivery trucks
you got me quick on this vid
Cant wait for: How it's actually made - Almonds
I feel like saying decoy almonds arent real is exactly what you would say if they existed
Hello, i make decoy almonds for a living
This is probably the most tame out of all of these videos...
Lmfao “picked out by a human inspector with their filthy unwashed hands” 💀💀 did anyone not hear that?? 3:56
yellow almonds are sent straight to almond hell where they are updated on current world affairs and their fear is used to power the factory for all eternity
1:17 idk what it is but those machine, the way their shaking just doesnt look real like someone edited the footage.
bro you have to watch these high idk if im late but this is amazing
"Decoy almonds don't exist". That's what they want you to think...
I now live every day in fear of decoy almonds
The only thing I wanted to learn was how the shells were removed.
Good thing I found out it was magic! Mystery solved.
Honestly I gotta appreciate how you’re calling the employees out. Some of them aren’t even wearing gloves lol
The synth player is having too much fun at 2:47
I just lost it when he said "high-income families can pay a substantial premium to have first dibs on the almonds they want. for a smaller fee, you can pull this level that makes some almonds spill out"
2:15 *MOOD*
"In an effort to further robotic science, this robot has been programmed to eat almonds"
I-
My dumbass went "hey he sounds like Andrew from The Official-"
Since I'm highly allergic to almonds, they can all go to almond hell
The joke at 0:21 sounds like something that would actually be in the show
if decoy almonds did in fact exist, would they go to almond hell or would they have a special decoy almond hell?
0:49 Big Eddy is the og Big Ed
It took me way too long to figure out this was satirical
A perfect almond is also known as a “Cashew”
I could watch these videos non-stop all day long
4:11 b-but what happens to... the red almonds?
We don't talk about the red almonds.
This really activates my almonds
Heres a game:
Eat 6 almonds every time he says almond
If you eat 7, that's about a pound of almonds.
Big eddy soothed me with his gentle touch once...
The court date is next month.
0:21 As a Californian, almonds are definitely not a guilt- free snack. For what they're worth (calorie and protein content) it takes WAY too much water to grow and maintain the trees. Made worse since farms tend to be in the dry desert areas that desperately need water (as opposed to the more fertile valleys that collect mountain water) since land prices are (were?) rising and desert land is cheaper.
Prob should nab that desert land so you'll get beach front property when the big one hits...Or when Alex Luthor nukes the fault line.
“Any yellow Almonds are sent to ✨Almond Hell✨” is such an Awsome line
0:34
I know this isn't interesting, but I work for a company that makes these types of trailers
Maybe you can tell us how those are actually made
I guessed all of them were decoys having seen so many episodes of this, and I was still wrong. You have made me look foolish yet again.
that "P" was very crisp 👌🏾 3:25
I found your channel last night at 2am and i regret nothing.
Anyone else think huggbees sounded different like he was sick or something
He probably said almonds too many times and got sick of saying it
Depressed maybe
Sick of saying almonds
My favorite how it's actually made video so far, and that is a ridiculously high bar.
Shoulda played the vsauce theme at the end XD
4:55 "Or do they?" (Vcause music starts)
4:54
*vsauce music starts playing*
I like how "mMMmMM" as a response to his own question is in the script
"Almonds are guilt free"
Me, with a nut allergy:
Then it’s only guilt free once if you forget your Epipen
I like how Big Eddy can somehow change his race.
Fun fact: almonds contain cyanide
For a moment you had my mom convinced this was a very factual and informative video
*DISCLAIMER: THIS IS PROBABLY NOT HOW ITS MADE*
I bet the room with all the shaking machines disoriented a few workers in a factory because whenever I thought it looked like the entire room was shaking
I can't believe you left out the tree shaking machine and almond boat. The comedy writes itself!
I'm not entirely sure that he doesn't just start these videos with the actual video's introduction.