Why You Should STOP Blaming Your PARENTS

Welcome to a heartfelt exploration in Today's episode, where I delve into the reasons why blaming our parents may hinder our personal growth.
Why do we blame our parents, and what can we learn when we release this blame? Join me as I share my personal experience about moving from Russia to Greece, the stark contrasts of communism Russia and the abundance of the Athenian Riviera. I talk about my own mistakes of blaming my parents and how after many years I came to the realization that this is not the way forward.
I discovered the profound impact of viewing our parents' lives through a lens of compassion rather than judgment.
This episode is not just about finding peace with our past but also about unlocking pathways to our own emotional liberation. Whether you're on a journey of self-discovery or seeking to mend family ties, I hope that this discussion will offer you the keys to understanding and empathy.
Exercise: Your Time For Deeper Reflection
As promised I'm sharing these three questions to help you reflect on your own relationship with your parents. Remember to be compassionate with yourself during this exercise-everyone's life is different, and it's important not to compare yourself to others. Focus solely on your own path, acknowledging that your journey is uniquely yours.
1. List three things that you blame your parents for. Don't overthink it too much, just write down what comes to mind.
2. Now look at the answers you have written, take a moment to reflect and honestly write down your answer to this question: Are you being to harsh on your parents? If your answer is Yes move to the next question, if your answer is No, please write a few sentences about why you are feeling hurt. Then move on to the next question.
3. What are the three things that you are grateful for (things that your parents have done for you in the last week) - no matter how big or small, an act of kindness is always appreciated. Show gratitude for the little things.
Remember, there are no right or wrong answers here. This exercise is designed to help you grow into the best version of yourself.
👉If you want to share your reflections, I would love to hear from you.
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I’m just someone who wants to inspire you to do better by sharing my own experiences and struggles. I am not a licensed therapist, and this channel is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional.

[@stephlom]

This hits home for me. I have some anger and resentment towards my parents, that i mostly worked through. But the truth is my mum was one of 9 in a 2 bedroom home and my dad was an orphan by the age of 14. They both did the best they could and are not bad people.

[@elenasergeevaofficial]

Thank you for sharing your story Steph. Most people are good, sometimes they just loose their way and unfortunately we don't get to choose our surroundings when we are kids. I just found that looking at my parents from a place of love and taking away the judgement helped me. It's always easier to judge but we don't know how we would react if we were in their shoes. Sending you hugs and may you reach a point that you have a wonderful relationship with your parents. It takes work, all relationships do, but it is possible.

[@moonstrukk126]

@@elenasergeevaofficial OMG NO. My father is an abusive narcissist. Most people are not good, that's a dangerous and NAIVE position.Good lord 1 in 10 people has a diagnosed anti social personality disorder. Imagine how many are un-diagnosed. Sensitive empathetic individuals must be discerning. Trying to get difficult people to treat you well is the epitome of childhood trauma. People should focus on healing and undoing the damage. Forgiveness is not and should never be the goal. I hope you don't continue to give survivors of childhood trauma at the hand of their parents to continue to expose themselves to toxic abusive relationships under the guise of healing and forgiveness. I don't advise any survivor to prioritize why someone is abusive if they want to heal. I advise understanding why we feel obligated to be forgiving or understanding while being abused. Children are a product of their environment, and if a parent of an adult child cannot or will not change their abusive and toxic attitude the child should cut that parent out of their life and get some qualified assistance from a childhood trauma therapist. We cannot heal while being exposed to our abusers. Different if a parent understand the damage they caused and wants to make real amends and grow with their adult child. That is not the case for a majority of people. A lot of the time no contact is the healthier option. I feel like you mean well, and you think you are helping abuse victims but this is the absolute worst potentially harmful advice. Please do not come at me with platitudes and nonsense. Survivors should never seek to rebuild the opportunity for their abusive parents to abuse them some more.